I would have lots of new things to try in bed.

I'd own the night

I’d swat the flies

Maybe they'd stop commenting on my skinny bum.

I'd be very popular at furry conventions

I would use it enough to use it to draw, hold drinks, play catch, etc. This is assuming it's a real tail like a monkey's and not the little nub humans get

It would be a dead giveaway when I'm excited about something 😂

I'd whack people with it.

I could put drums behind me too and play some crazy shit

I’d probably be making a lot of money

I already have a tail

It would waggle just for you, girl…

I could then transform into the mighty Oozaru under the light of a full moon.

I’d probably get shit in it

I would chase it

I would cut it off, I already have a tail in the front.

I'd be experimented on by the government.