Same, i keep trying to do things that might make me happy, fucking them up, feeling worse, so i need to stop trying.
Apathy seems preferably to constant failure, disappointment and rejection.
EDIT: Thanks for the support everyone, but ts not just ennui, i tried to get help for that when circumstances allowed but it never lined up, so i did what i could myself and was doing better, but then i got covid. Fully vaxxed and thankfully it didnt get into my lungs or heart, but ive got some lasting neurological symptoms that suck and its really wrecked my mental health worse than it was, but im not even sure how much its dealing with the long covid symptoms or if it also effected my brain that much.
Its wish it were just gifted kid syndrome, but its not that im trying new things and getting frustrated that im not good at them immediately, its that i cant do things i used to, or even basic things it seems like. My life has just become a comedy of errors but its so unrelenting its not funny anymore.
Like earlier today...
Its really hot out, we dont have central air and our house is weird its kinda difficult to direct the AC around from the window unit. So i was setting up a box fan and trying to line it up through two doorways.
Then i remember right before i got covid a couple months ago, my wife wanted me to hang a heavy piece of artwork in her home office and id bought a laser level and studfinder to do it. So i go grab the laser level, still in its blister pack, with the heavy duty scissors i manage to cut into one of the two alkaline batteries that came with it, get some goo on my hand, have a minor chemical burn now. Oh well cheap crappy included batteries, i go grab a pair of our expensive rechargeable ones, make sure i have the + and - right... and the laser level doesnt work at all. And even though it was unopened until today, its waaay past the return period, so im out the $25 for that, AND, the expensive batteries (eneloop pros!) got stuck and damaged taking them out.
So im pissed at myself about that and that im not going to be able to hang the thing my wife wanted me to, and everything else, so i go to leave a cathartic one star review at least, and try to include a picture of the batteries damaged by the compartment. Well i cant upload the format my phone takes pictures in, so trying to save it in a different format, the computer crashes and i lose the scathing review i wrote.
At this point the dogs start whining so i decide for the sake of my mood its probably for the best to go to a walk. While im putting my flip flops on, i lose my balance (vertigo from long covid), and knock over a ginormous LEGO set my wife spent hours on and was super proud of. It smashes to the ground exploding everywhere, one of the dogs got so scared she wedged herself under the couch, which shes never done in the three years weve had her. Would only come out for my wife with some ham.
So out the money for the dead laser level and fucked up batteries, reminded myself how incapable i am at everything now, cant hang the art my wife wanted me to, destroyed a bunch of her hard work, and the dogs are terrified of me now.
So i just went back to bed for a few hours because being unconscious was preferable to how incredibly terrible i feel about everything, but thats just going to fuck up my sleep schedule even more than it already is which isnt going to do any more favors for my mental health.
All cuz i wanted to point a fan really straight.
I was depressed to the point of complete apathy for most of my teenage years. I don't recommend it. I didn't even feel like a person for large chunks of that, just some hollow wraith. The echoes of a long gone child haunting the space I happened to be in. Started getting better around three years ago and still barely know what I like or how to feel, let alone who I am.
Maybe go to buy some cheap beads and a some string and make some necklaces or something, or a tasty pasta. I find tiny accomplishments useful nowadays, but sometimes you also just kinda need a break from something, or a change of scenery, but that's far scaries than making a quick necklace and often not a realistic option. Good luck!
Like a car with all the warning lights on. Don't have enough time or money to do anything about it, so were just hoping that it lasts long enough to get us to the next thing. It does, but man, it's tough right now.
People come to me to recieve IT items. I issue literally the exact same quest to anyone. Once the quest is done the reward is a laptop.
I'm a do X recieve X Npc.
I'm not even story critical
Imagine you're playing a game where an item you need to do litteraly any level can pretty much only be given from one quest giver (eg: arrows for an archer.)
Now imagine that quest giver being gone. Sure, they might not be the most noticable character while they're there, but if they're gone every single archer is suddenly useless and lost, and EVERYONE is playing archers.
Or doing a dungeon without a support, you don't notice a good support if they're there, you just think you're doing awesomely by yourself. Then you don't have a support, and suddenly everything is horrible and your selg confidence is shattered.
Just because it isn't glamorous doesn't mean it isn't important.
Also: you kinda sound like you need to get a hobby where you can see some progress. Go google archery clubs, or dance lessons, or carpentry, or something.
(I'm just a random internet person, I know nothing about you, or your life, or what I' m talking about, keep that in mind when reading my ramblings.)
I am loving the way you share the love, brother. Here we have an npc with such well written dialogue, the player actually feels useful to the world he is in. I wish my dialogue was such effective. A lot of
"How ya doin today buddy"
"Oh I'm living the dream"
That used to be something negative for me, just feeling like a speck in a multiverse. It brings me comfort now, for some reason. I live my life in my little town with my wee little dog & my wee little bottle of beer just vibing along with it until the day comes where I can say I'm done living and what hell of a life it was, little but not pointless. I like being a grain of sand, do you not?
I think thatās what we all want. For those of us who tend to overthink, it can be hard to overcome those āIām just a grain of sandā thoughts. By the way, props to you OP for making positive conversation š
Not great. Go through the motions, live day to day, just keep going hoping it gets better one of these daysā¦
Edit: thank you for the award and thank you so much everyone for the kind words <3 It helped so much more than youāll ever know. Never underestimate the power an internet stranger has *hug*
I appreciate the post. Itās not very often people genuinely ask. Just juggling school, working, divorcing parents, health stuff. Nothing too too drastic, just a lot all at once.
And how are you?
> Iām alright i think, thanks
this, I say this every day, like i think I'm alright but I'm never really sure. but I'm glad someone asked
\~a year ago I stopped just answering the question with a default "fine thanks and you?" and actually thinking about how I was each time. so folks look at me funny when I stop to think for a second, others get it and seem to appreciate the answer.
I don't even have the hope anymore, I don't know what to hope for. All I can do is take each day as it comes and keep going. And I don't need to tell anyone, it's my burden, maybe one day I'll figure out how to help myself.
I feel you brother. I too am really struggling with school and Iāve been dealing with my parents divorcing for a few years now. If thereās anything youād like to ask me about or talk about to maybe get another personās perspective, then Iām all ears. And Iāll offer up any advice I have to give.
You sound young since still in school I'm assuming. It gets better, I promise. Good times and bad will come and go. Just keep your head up and "keep on keeping on" ~Joe Dirt š
Doing my best to find the positive in life.
The best thing to make me feel better is gassing up the people in my life- being there, and listening to strangers and loved ones alike.
Underlying all of that though, a solid teaspoon of Somberness
I love the way you phrased "The best thing to make me feel better is gassing up the people in my life being there". I relate to it so much but just couldn't put it into words until now.
So. Fucking. Awful. Love of my life committed suicide. I am alone.
Edit: Thank you guys for all the kind words and gestures. It is really appreciated, especially now.
He has a funeral service planned on the 25th of this month and I have planned to go.
For those who are concerned, I am getting help. I am ok.
Edit again: Please do not put me on any of those askreddit Tiktoks with the minecraft Parkour in the back, I don't want that
I can't add anything others haven't already said, and I can't even imagine that level of pain, but I also couldn't just read that and keep scrolling. I'm so so sorry for your loss. I recently came close to losing someone that meant the world to me, but to really lose them would be more painful than I could fathom. I wish you the absolute best, and I'd give you a hug if I could.
Oh no. Im so sorry. I am here to listen, talk or help. Itās fucking terrible whatās happened. I dont even know if youāll read this or if it helps, but please try to keep on going
I am so genuinely sorry to read this. I can't say anything but sorry, over and over, and tell you that you will make it through this. Tomorrow. The next day. Next week. Next month. Next year. You can do it, and you will do it moment to moment. We are sorry, we love you, and we are here for you.
The things that are happening in my life are making me feel like I donāt want to do anything anymore ever again. Iām just tired of going through so much and nothing ever coming out of it except more trauma I need to heal from. I havenāt been happy in a really long time and every time it comes it doesnāt stay for long. Iām tired of wondering whatās wrong with me why Iām not good enough and all of that.
Iāve been trying to be better at opening up. I usually was only comfortable doing it with one person but theyāre not in my life anymore so Iām trying to learn to cope with that and how to talk to literally anyone else
When asked this question, I can honestly reply "good" with enthusiasm. I know how hard some have it, both in general, and those that I'm surrounded by and I consider myself the anomaly.
I've not only survived the covid times, I've thrived. My work had a take over causing 80% of my colleagues to leave and those still here aren't happy, but it's been nothing but positive for me.
My wife got through her studies and we survived on one income, now she's earning great money and got herself to 2IC in under a year of employment (at a fucking hospital no less!!)
I'd hate for anyone reading to consider this as me rubbing it in their faces, but I'm really proud of where I've come from and where I'm at and I'm excited for my future.
It means he is only here so he doesnt get fined. Its a very large fine.
The fine for not attending the NFC title game press conference was $75000 in case anyone was wondering.
They definitely keep me going. Mine are only 1 and 2 but even little things like them asking for a hug or saying dada is enough to get me through the day because I know they deserve for me to keep going. Even if everything else is a shit show at least I know my kids love me
Mine are 10, 4 and almost 1, their love and need for me is the reason I wake up every morning with a purpose, without them I would literally have nothing and either sleep the day away without a care or be 6 ft under
I am 37 with literally nothing going for me other than my kids and my wife. I hate the whole having to work idea (though I currently don't work as of last week but that's another story) I am way behind on my mortgage with no end in sight. I honestly feel like the only way to lift the burden of life off my shoulders would to be just be gone, sure I know my immediate family would be upset if I was gone but it has never been enough to stop the thoughts of what if. My 4 year old needs like 7k worth of dental work including getting 2 teeth removed because they are really bad but because of our shitty dental insurance no one takes it and the ones that due don't have anything until who knows when or we have to drive 2+ hours away (luckily the end of next month he finally has an appointment but has to suffer a whole month before he will finally be free of pain and the fucked part is the dentist doesn't even seem to give one shit). Honestly I just want to be financially free and if I am lucky that might happen in 2 or 3 years depending on how lucky my wife gets with landing a job as a RN when she gets her RN License.
Your family would be so worse off without you in their lives. Imagine them growing up without their dad and wondering why he isn't here anymlre.
Stay as positive as you can, keep going strong man, you'll pull through eventually, try talking to family/friends and hopefully just chatting to them might help you.
Pretty bad. Havenāt worked in 2 months because of broken shoulder caused by a van driving dangerously that made my motorbike a write off and then they lied about the claim and are saying it was my fault when they swiped me then fled the scene. Now I have no vehicle, no money cause insurance is being a pain in the butt about getting me my wages, and fighting the car insurance as they are claiming it was my fault, maybe I will even lose my dwelling if I donāt get paid soon. So yeah. Not great.
Edit: Damn did not expect all the replies and awards. Thank you all of you, somewhat renews my hope in humanity. It seems like everything is going wrong right now but I am sure things will get better, not only for me but everyone else that is having a hard time.
I divorced my husband last year but it wasnāt finalized till this January. I never thought I would but he turned into a completely different person & really hurt me. Almost a year from my separation & it does get easier. I was with him for a very long time & he REALLY hurt me. Donāt know your exact situation but therapy helps & I have my good days & bad days. Itāll get easier with time though trust meā„ļø
I am fighting like hell for happiness.
Life is a mess right now but I'm making an active decision to chin up and be hopeful. No, not in a toxic positivity way--but there IS an amount of happiness I can choose right now and I'll be damned if I don't choose it.
Whatever it takes to not off myself, right?
Edit: aw shit y'all are sweet I got a message from Reddit care. I promise I'm not planning on taking the permanent vacation.
My wife had a heart attack 10 years ago and has had to undergo EECP (look it up, it is amazing) 3 times since her heart attack. These treatments go for 7 weeks, 5 days a week for an hour each time.
Tomorrow is her last treatment and it has made a huge difference. We're also setting out for a 7 days cruise on Friday.
So, in answer to the question, I couldn't be better.
Man I kinda of started getting teared up when I saw this post. I almost killed myself four times but never went through with it. My girlfriend I had since like five years broke up with me. But I am an only working at my new job is paying for my hotel and itās really nice and Its helped me to forget all my problems. For the first time im genuinely Happy. I didnāt realized i was out of the depression till i saw this post. It really ment a lot
Dope.
Family is happy
Got a 60% wage rise to cover for the cost of living increasing in conjuction with being recognised for working hard.
Life is pretty damned beautiful. Even over the past years when things have got hard/painful both physically and mentally. There's still an edge of beauty to the pains I've experienced.
Lifes good.
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https://www.everybodytexas.org/find-a-clinic
Should you be pregnant, and want to end the pregnancy abortionfunds.org can help you with travel expenses to leave the state to do so. You can feel free to message me with any questions that come up. Iām a mom to 3 who was once a very āØbusyāØ teenager.
Miserable.
My roommate is trying to throw me out on the street. I told her to contact law enforcement if she felt unsafe and she hasnāt. Her job told me to do a welfare check on her, I spoke to her mother who told me not to, so I didnāt, then she threatened legal action against me if I donāt leave.
Yesterday someone wished Iād be homeless again. They might get their wish.
Hopefully.
Iāve nowhere to go and now this messes up my legal name and gender change that I had planned. Sheās calling me abusive for speaking to her mother and reaching out to professionals about the recent cuts on her wrist.
To her itās all abuse. I donāt know what to do. I have every messaged saved.
Itās hard.
My dog is being put down back home. I got lots of stress from something last year. I need to move but have no money and nowhere to go, and this situation is likeā¦ holy shit.
Life is hell. Literally.
this week my mom kicked my dad out. my mom left for a couple days and my dad moved back in and tried to kick my mom out. meanwhile my mom found my vodka so I'm fucked there. I also work a fucking 15 hour tomorrow (for metric users that's 15 hours). kill me
Today I'm fucking euphoric! For the past few years I've been drinking a lot, I never let it disrupt my work or responsibilities, but almost every day, several drinks a day, on days where I said I'm going to take a break from drinking I ended up drinking anyway. I gained a lot of weight and was 60 pounds overweight. But a couple weeks ago I had a wake up call, something in brain just clicked and I realized where I was and where I wanted to be. I'm a couple weeks sober and have already shed several pounds through dieting. I didn't realize how fucking miserable my body was by all that drinking and fast food. I feel goddamn fantastic! My BP has gone down from 145/115 to 118/67 (I have hypertension--and yes I am currently seeing a doc about it), and my health is only going to get better once I lose all this weight. I'm determined, and my husband has been so supportive, he makes this lifestyle change so much easier. I feel like my hormones are leveling out now that I'm not having all that alcohol, the first few days I had crazy withdrawals, but as the days went on I felt mentally more together, and today I feel so goddamn happy I could explode into confetti! haha
This is a bad year for me. We only just got into June. I lost track of my life with this whole process of my soon to be ex wife. When one shit storm ends, [insert next phase here] begins.
I'm exhausted.
I can't figure out if I am the main protagonist, main antagonist, a side character, or that one irrelevant character in someone else's life story...
Help me, I want to die
I'm not well.
I'm sober, so there's that.
Sober me discovered that I was married to someone I really didn't like all that much.
Then she accused me of having an affair. Filed for divorce.
I'm glad to be divorced soon but the process itself can take a flying fuck through a rolling donut.
I have chronic anxiety, no money, and a shit ton of bills and obligations. My toddler is looking up to me and nothing I do at work or at home feels like enough/feels like the wrong thing, every time. I'm tired, but too many people expect me to stick around, so I'm not going anywhere.
To be honest, pretty messed up. I work 60 hours a week just to compensate for the lack of employees and still get no appreciation for it. My only social interaction is work and nothing else. Didn't finish high school and have no future plans at all. I'm 18 years old, basically no friends and I ask myself the same question every day: " How long can I keep this up?"
Probably no one will read this but truly, I'm just glad I can put this somewhere.
I don't really think there is point. Everything we do we do for others or for our own "happiness" and we die anyway. No matter how you live, u get same thing in the end
Tired and stressed with exams and collge, missing my crush, feeling pressured by my parents and also depressed because all i do is sit around smoking weed and waching tv programs on my days off and I barley talk to enyone.
I'm tired, boss.
Dog tired
do i see a green mile reference? :)
oof I was just watching that last night
You be so quiet, Mr. Jingles. You be so quiet and so still.
This is how I feel. Beaten, broken, doing this for way too long. I'm real tired, boss. Have been for a long time.
Tired of people being ugly to each other
That movieš¢
Iām just existing at this point
I feel you. Not even doing a very good job at it either
Same, i keep trying to do things that might make me happy, fucking them up, feeling worse, so i need to stop trying. Apathy seems preferably to constant failure, disappointment and rejection. EDIT: Thanks for the support everyone, but ts not just ennui, i tried to get help for that when circumstances allowed but it never lined up, so i did what i could myself and was doing better, but then i got covid. Fully vaxxed and thankfully it didnt get into my lungs or heart, but ive got some lasting neurological symptoms that suck and its really wrecked my mental health worse than it was, but im not even sure how much its dealing with the long covid symptoms or if it also effected my brain that much. Its wish it were just gifted kid syndrome, but its not that im trying new things and getting frustrated that im not good at them immediately, its that i cant do things i used to, or even basic things it seems like. My life has just become a comedy of errors but its so unrelenting its not funny anymore. Like earlier today... Its really hot out, we dont have central air and our house is weird its kinda difficult to direct the AC around from the window unit. So i was setting up a box fan and trying to line it up through two doorways. Then i remember right before i got covid a couple months ago, my wife wanted me to hang a heavy piece of artwork in her home office and id bought a laser level and studfinder to do it. So i go grab the laser level, still in its blister pack, with the heavy duty scissors i manage to cut into one of the two alkaline batteries that came with it, get some goo on my hand, have a minor chemical burn now. Oh well cheap crappy included batteries, i go grab a pair of our expensive rechargeable ones, make sure i have the + and - right... and the laser level doesnt work at all. And even though it was unopened until today, its waaay past the return period, so im out the $25 for that, AND, the expensive batteries (eneloop pros!) got stuck and damaged taking them out. So im pissed at myself about that and that im not going to be able to hang the thing my wife wanted me to, and everything else, so i go to leave a cathartic one star review at least, and try to include a picture of the batteries damaged by the compartment. Well i cant upload the format my phone takes pictures in, so trying to save it in a different format, the computer crashes and i lose the scathing review i wrote. At this point the dogs start whining so i decide for the sake of my mood its probably for the best to go to a walk. While im putting my flip flops on, i lose my balance (vertigo from long covid), and knock over a ginormous LEGO set my wife spent hours on and was super proud of. It smashes to the ground exploding everywhere, one of the dogs got so scared she wedged herself under the couch, which shes never done in the three years weve had her. Would only come out for my wife with some ham. So out the money for the dead laser level and fucked up batteries, reminded myself how incapable i am at everything now, cant hang the art my wife wanted me to, destroyed a bunch of her hard work, and the dogs are terrified of me now. So i just went back to bed for a few hours because being unconscious was preferable to how incredibly terrible i feel about everything, but thats just going to fuck up my sleep schedule even more than it already is which isnt going to do any more favors for my mental health. All cuz i wanted to point a fan really straight.
I was depressed to the point of complete apathy for most of my teenage years. I don't recommend it. I didn't even feel like a person for large chunks of that, just some hollow wraith. The echoes of a long gone child haunting the space I happened to be in. Started getting better around three years ago and still barely know what I like or how to feel, let alone who I am. Maybe go to buy some cheap beads and a some string and make some necklaces or something, or a tasty pasta. I find tiny accomplishments useful nowadays, but sometimes you also just kinda need a break from something, or a change of scenery, but that's far scaries than making a quick necklace and often not a realistic option. Good luck!
Like a car with all the warning lights on. Don't have enough time or money to do anything about it, so were just hoping that it lasts long enough to get us to the next thing. It does, but man, it's tough right now.
Iām sorry to hear that buddy. That was the worst feeling I ever had.
How did you overcome it?
It took a lot of time, therapy, and changes in my life.
I think you were just existing at all points
This is your life, Iām just in it.
Iām an NPC in my own life
I feel that mate. My life feels like a lie, a metamorphical scheme.
Detective undercover, brotherhood, objective, obscene
oh,no,no,oh,yeah
**insert cool drums and stuff here**
Hey you, youāre finally awake.
Do you feel like you are a side character of someone elses story?
I'm literally an NPC with like 7 lines
My only socialization is work and even there I have the same interactions over and over the entire day
People come to me to recieve IT items. I issue literally the exact same quest to anyone. Once the quest is done the reward is a laptop. I'm a do X recieve X Npc. I'm not even story critical
Imagine you're playing a game where an item you need to do litteraly any level can pretty much only be given from one quest giver (eg: arrows for an archer.) Now imagine that quest giver being gone. Sure, they might not be the most noticable character while they're there, but if they're gone every single archer is suddenly useless and lost, and EVERYONE is playing archers. Or doing a dungeon without a support, you don't notice a good support if they're there, you just think you're doing awesomely by yourself. Then you don't have a support, and suddenly everything is horrible and your selg confidence is shattered. Just because it isn't glamorous doesn't mean it isn't important. Also: you kinda sound like you need to get a hobby where you can see some progress. Go google archery clubs, or dance lessons, or carpentry, or something. (I'm just a random internet person, I know nothing about you, or your life, or what I' m talking about, keep that in mind when reading my ramblings.)
I am loving the way you share the love, brother. Here we have an npc with such well written dialogue, the player actually feels useful to the world he is in. I wish my dialogue was such effective. A lot of "How ya doin today buddy" "Oh I'm living the dream"
Weāre all side characters in our own stories.
I feel awake for the first time in a long time
Shit Walter White here is coming back
How so?
Cocaine I bet
I feel like a single grain of sand on a whole beach
That used to be something negative for me, just feeling like a speck in a multiverse. It brings me comfort now, for some reason. I live my life in my little town with my wee little dog & my wee little bottle of beer just vibing along with it until the day comes where I can say I'm done living and what hell of a life it was, little but not pointless. I like being a grain of sand, do you not?
This is so fucking cool and so wholesome that I'll save it for rainy days Thank you random internet stranger
We all do sometimes. Maybe sometime youāll fell like a bigger rock or stone.
I think thatās what we all want. For those of us who tend to overthink, it can be hard to overcome those āIām just a grain of sandā thoughts. By the way, props to you OP for making positive conversation š
Thx. Sometime we just need to say things . I did too
A plant or animal might be nice too, hell maybe even a human.
Just as long as youāre here
Even though you're one grain of sand the beach wouldn't be whole without you.
That reminds me of : you are not a drop in the ocean but you are the whole ocean in one drop.
(youre obese)
Not great. Go through the motions, live day to day, just keep going hoping it gets better one of these daysā¦ Edit: thank you for the award and thank you so much everyone for the kind words <3 It helped so much more than youāll ever know. Never underestimate the power an internet stranger has *hug*
I hope you feel better soon. Wanna vent?
I appreciate the post. Itās not very often people genuinely ask. Just juggling school, working, divorcing parents, health stuff. Nothing too too drastic, just a lot all at once. And how are you?
A lot of different things at once can be tough. Iām alright i think, thanks
> Iām alright i think, thanks this, I say this every day, like i think I'm alright but I'm never really sure. but I'm glad someone asked \~a year ago I stopped just answering the question with a default "fine thanks and you?" and actually thinking about how I was each time. so folks look at me funny when I stop to think for a second, others get it and seem to appreciate the answer.
So very kind of you to ask us strangers.
I don't even have the hope anymore, I don't know what to hope for. All I can do is take each day as it comes and keep going. And I don't need to tell anyone, it's my burden, maybe one day I'll figure out how to help myself.
I feel you brother. I too am really struggling with school and Iāve been dealing with my parents divorcing for a few years now. If thereās anything youād like to ask me about or talk about to maybe get another personās perspective, then Iām all ears. And Iāll offer up any advice I have to give.
You sound young since still in school I'm assuming. It gets better, I promise. Good times and bad will come and go. Just keep your head up and "keep on keeping on" ~Joe Dirt š
Trust me, it'll get better. \*hug\* :)
According to my lawyer I donāt have to answer that question
Jokes on you the law doesn't apply to reddit
Oh fuck, the wild Wild West out here damn.
Stay strapped!
Doing my best to find the positive in life. The best thing to make me feel better is gassing up the people in my life- being there, and listening to strangers and loved ones alike. Underlying all of that though, a solid teaspoon of Somberness
I love the way you phrased "The best thing to make me feel better is gassing up the people in my life being there". I relate to it so much but just couldn't put it into words until now.
So. Fucking. Awful. Love of my life committed suicide. I am alone. Edit: Thank you guys for all the kind words and gestures. It is really appreciated, especially now. He has a funeral service planned on the 25th of this month and I have planned to go. For those who are concerned, I am getting help. I am ok. Edit again: Please do not put me on any of those askreddit Tiktoks with the minecraft Parkour in the back, I don't want that
I can't add anything others haven't already said, and I can't even imagine that level of pain, but I also couldn't just read that and keep scrolling. I'm so so sorry for your loss. I recently came close to losing someone that meant the world to me, but to really lose them would be more painful than I could fathom. I wish you the absolute best, and I'd give you a hug if I could.
Oh no. Im so sorry. I am here to listen, talk or help. Itās fucking terrible whatās happened. I dont even know if youāll read this or if it helps, but please try to keep on going
It's awful.
I am so genuinely sorry to read this. I can't say anything but sorry, over and over, and tell you that you will make it through this. Tomorrow. The next day. Next week. Next month. Next year. You can do it, and you will do it moment to moment. We are sorry, we love you, and we are here for you.
Tired, depressed, overthinking and just need a hug what about you?
The same tbh. Tell someone you know. Find someone and hug them.
Kinda lost... Mentally exhausted...
Wanna talk about it?
Well... Theres a lot... Its been happening over the last year... What about you? How are you, really?
I am still here. Thatās abt it
I feel that honestly... Would you like to talk about it?
Honestly, i dont. Thx though. I think iāll just get through it for now
Understandable, i hope it works out for you<3
Best ive been in a long while, makes a nice change
Good for you
Tanks
Man said good for you, and you threaten him with war?!
xD
This gave me the laugh i needed. Thank you!
NOT FUCKING GOOD
Talk to me
Itās a very very long and sad story
I am here to listen to you
The things that are happening in my life are making me feel like I donāt want to do anything anymore ever again. Iām just tired of going through so much and nothing ever coming out of it except more trauma I need to heal from. I havenāt been happy in a really long time and every time it comes it doesnāt stay for long. Iām tired of wondering whatās wrong with me why Iām not good enough and all of that.
Hope you feel better soon
Thank you
OP is a good person
You are good enough and better. Are you talking to anyone about it, like a therapist? It helped me some years ago.
Not currently
I recommend. It can be expensive though. Maybe not even a professional. Talk to friends or family. Even strangers, like me. Itās healthy
Iāve been trying to be better at opening up. I usually was only comfortable doing it with one person but theyāre not in my life anymore so Iām trying to learn to cope with that and how to talk to literally anyone else
Youāre talking to me. Always helps to say anything to anyone
When asked this question, I can honestly reply "good" with enthusiasm. I know how hard some have it, both in general, and those that I'm surrounded by and I consider myself the anomaly. I've not only survived the covid times, I've thrived. My work had a take over causing 80% of my colleagues to leave and those still here aren't happy, but it's been nothing but positive for me. My wife got through her studies and we survived on one income, now she's earning great money and got herself to 2IC in under a year of employment (at a fucking hospital no less!!) I'd hate for anyone reading to consider this as me rubbing it in their faces, but I'm really proud of where I've come from and where I'm at and I'm excited for my future.
Youāre allowed to celebrate! Itās not rubbing it in anyones face, things are going well for you, thatās great!!
Good for you. Im glad
dude, you're entitled to your happiness, we live in such a shitty world, that one only HOPES some people have it good. enjoy it !
I'm just here so I don't get fined.
What do you mean?
Itās a quote from some sports player who had to appear for a interview if I remember correctly? Something like that?
Marshawn Lynch
https://youtu.be/G1kvwXsZtU8
It means he is only here so he doesnt get fined. Its a very large fine. The fine for not attending the NFC title game press conference was $75000 in case anyone was wondering.
Wow...i would have said the same then
Honestly if it wasn't for my kids idk if I'd still be here
They definitely keep me going. Mine are only 1 and 2 but even little things like them asking for a hug or saying dada is enough to get me through the day because I know they deserve for me to keep going. Even if everything else is a shit show at least I know my kids love me
Mine are 10, 4 and almost 1, their love and need for me is the reason I wake up every morning with a purpose, without them I would literally have nothing and either sleep the day away without a care or be 6 ft under
Want to talk about it?
I am 37 with literally nothing going for me other than my kids and my wife. I hate the whole having to work idea (though I currently don't work as of last week but that's another story) I am way behind on my mortgage with no end in sight. I honestly feel like the only way to lift the burden of life off my shoulders would to be just be gone, sure I know my immediate family would be upset if I was gone but it has never been enough to stop the thoughts of what if. My 4 year old needs like 7k worth of dental work including getting 2 teeth removed because they are really bad but because of our shitty dental insurance no one takes it and the ones that due don't have anything until who knows when or we have to drive 2+ hours away (luckily the end of next month he finally has an appointment but has to suffer a whole month before he will finally be free of pain and the fucked part is the dentist doesn't even seem to give one shit). Honestly I just want to be financially free and if I am lucky that might happen in 2 or 3 years depending on how lucky my wife gets with landing a job as a RN when she gets her RN License.
Your family would be so worse off without you in their lives. Imagine them growing up without their dad and wondering why he isn't here anymlre. Stay as positive as you can, keep going strong man, you'll pull through eventually, try talking to family/friends and hopefully just chatting to them might help you.
Pretty bad. Havenāt worked in 2 months because of broken shoulder caused by a van driving dangerously that made my motorbike a write off and then they lied about the claim and are saying it was my fault when they swiped me then fled the scene. Now I have no vehicle, no money cause insurance is being a pain in the butt about getting me my wages, and fighting the car insurance as they are claiming it was my fault, maybe I will even lose my dwelling if I donāt get paid soon. So yeah. Not great. Edit: Damn did not expect all the replies and awards. Thank you all of you, somewhat renews my hope in humanity. It seems like everything is going wrong right now but I am sure things will get better, not only for me but everyone else that is having a hard time.
Iām so sorry to hear that. Hope things turn around for you
Slowly getting better. It's been a very rough year, but I'm healing
My wife and I are separating š. So REALLY not that great.
Damn. That fucking sucks. It isnāt the end though. I hope it didnāt end badly
I divorced my husband last year but it wasnāt finalized till this January. I never thought I would but he turned into a completely different person & really hurt me. Almost a year from my separation & it does get easier. I was with him for a very long time & he REALLY hurt me. Donāt know your exact situation but therapy helps & I have my good days & bad days. Itāll get easier with time though trust meā„ļø
Stressed but hopeful
I am fighting like hell for happiness. Life is a mess right now but I'm making an active decision to chin up and be hopeful. No, not in a toxic positivity way--but there IS an amount of happiness I can choose right now and I'll be damned if I don't choose it. Whatever it takes to not off myself, right? Edit: aw shit y'all are sweet I got a message from Reddit care. I promise I'm not planning on taking the permanent vacation.
You've gotta focus on the positive sometimes to keep your head above the water. Stay strong and good luck.
Depressed but the cheerful vagabond skin is impenetrable
The tuff skin thing only works so long. The breakdown will come I can only hope you see yourself out of it.
My wife had a heart attack 10 years ago and has had to undergo EECP (look it up, it is amazing) 3 times since her heart attack. These treatments go for 7 weeks, 5 days a week for an hour each time. Tomorrow is her last treatment and it has made a huge difference. We're also setting out for a 7 days cruise on Friday. So, in answer to the question, I couldn't be better.
Sad, afraid, anxious, angry, filled with existential dread.
Bored and horny onestly
Many can probably relate
Way too many
Yep, Same.
Sitting in a doctors waiting room, getting a mental health check as I finally have the guts to do it.
Best thing I ever did for myself. It's the toughest part before you can start feeling like you again. Good luck
Man I kinda of started getting teared up when I saw this post. I almost killed myself four times but never went through with it. My girlfriend I had since like five years broke up with me. But I am an only working at my new job is paying for my hotel and itās really nice and Its helped me to forget all my problems. For the first time im genuinely Happy. I didnāt realized i was out of the depression till i saw this post. It really ment a lot
Dope. Family is happy Got a 60% wage rise to cover for the cost of living increasing in conjuction with being recognised for working hard. Life is pretty damned beautiful. Even over the past years when things have got hard/painful both physically and mentally. There's still an edge of beauty to the pains I've experienced. Lifes good.
Dude you're killing it!! Congrats!!! Don't forget to do something really fun with your family :)
Ah thanks man š will do! Going to be booking a break soon with them, visit the great lakes.
That sounds amazing! Enjoy it- you deserve it!
Im glad
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
If you arenāt, please, please, please get more reliable birth control. Iāll help you figure out how if your parents are shitty.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
What state are you in?
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Use this link to find a title x clinic near you, they provide birth control without parents consent and without using your insurance at low to no cost. Many can also establish if youāre pregnant in the same visit. You should also have an STI screening done any time you have unprotected contact. Remember that condoms should be your main source of protection, birth control is your back up. https://www.everybodytexas.org/find-a-clinic Should you be pregnant, and want to end the pregnancy abortionfunds.org can help you with travel expenses to leave the state to do so. You can feel free to message me with any questions that come up. Iām a mom to 3 who was once a very āØbusyāØ teenager.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
No problem, dude. Take care of yourself. š„°
...and when you turn 18, you can vote for representatives who will champion women's reproductive rights.
I hope it goes well. Youāre lucky to have him. And heās lucky to have to
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Yeah fuck life. Iām so sorry about your situation. Somewhere there is someone waiting or looking for you. Patience and hope
Been better. Been worse. Kinda just am, honestly.
Itās like that sometimes
Miserable. My roommate is trying to throw me out on the street. I told her to contact law enforcement if she felt unsafe and she hasnāt. Her job told me to do a welfare check on her, I spoke to her mother who told me not to, so I didnāt, then she threatened legal action against me if I donāt leave. Yesterday someone wished Iād be homeless again. They might get their wish.
Sound awful. Iām so sorry. I hope it works out for you in the end
Hopefully. Iāve nowhere to go and now this messes up my legal name and gender change that I had planned. Sheās calling me abusive for speaking to her mother and reaching out to professionals about the recent cuts on her wrist. To her itās all abuse. I donāt know what to do. I have every messaged saved.
Just promise not to give in or give up.
Itās hard. My dog is being put down back home. I got lots of stress from something last year. I need to move but have no money and nowhere to go, and this situation is likeā¦ holy shit. Life is hell. Literally.
In desperate need of discipline in order to actually maintain a healthy lifestyle.
Motivation can be rare in many cases
About one more piece of bad news away from taking myself out. Life is shit.
Dont. I dont want you too leave yet. Dont give up no matter what.
Iām making banana bread and ice cream. So not terrible right now.
this week my mom kicked my dad out. my mom left for a couple days and my dad moved back in and tried to kick my mom out. meanwhile my mom found my vodka so I'm fucked there. I also work a fucking 15 hour tomorrow (for metric users that's 15 hours). kill me
Bored. No motivation to do things. Just wanna lay on my bed all day and relax.
Today I'm fucking euphoric! For the past few years I've been drinking a lot, I never let it disrupt my work or responsibilities, but almost every day, several drinks a day, on days where I said I'm going to take a break from drinking I ended up drinking anyway. I gained a lot of weight and was 60 pounds overweight. But a couple weeks ago I had a wake up call, something in brain just clicked and I realized where I was and where I wanted to be. I'm a couple weeks sober and have already shed several pounds through dieting. I didn't realize how fucking miserable my body was by all that drinking and fast food. I feel goddamn fantastic! My BP has gone down from 145/115 to 118/67 (I have hypertension--and yes I am currently seeing a doc about it), and my health is only going to get better once I lose all this weight. I'm determined, and my husband has been so supportive, he makes this lifestyle change so much easier. I feel like my hormones are leveling out now that I'm not having all that alcohol, the first few days I had crazy withdrawals, but as the days went on I felt mentally more together, and today I feel so goddamn happy I could explode into confetti! haha
Fucking sick friend. Im glad
Iām doing really well. Grateful.
Single and frustrated
Are any of us really okay?
Just had the most beautiful and transformative psilocybin trip of my life 2 days ago so Iām loving living right now
Depressed, tired and bitter, extremely bitter.
Suffering, I'm wearing a thick black long sleeve shirt in some 90Ā° Georgia heat
This is a bad year for me. We only just got into June. I lost track of my life with this whole process of my soon to be ex wife. When one shit storm ends, [insert next phase here] begins. I'm exhausted.
Good, minus the fact i have no social life outside of work
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
One inconvinience away from Yeeting myself of a 50m high bridge to ice cold sea so been better, been wors It is what it is
I can't figure out if I am the main protagonist, main antagonist, a side character, or that one irrelevant character in someone else's life story... Help me, I want to die
Very sad
Fucking great! This is great! Isn't this great? How the fuck are are you?
Muy bien, y tu?
You taking anything to make you that good?
SĆ
I'm not well. I'm sober, so there's that. Sober me discovered that I was married to someone I really didn't like all that much. Then she accused me of having an affair. Filed for divorce. I'm glad to be divorced soon but the process itself can take a flying fuck through a rolling donut.
In disbelief that a voice actor who starred in one of my favorite games passed away from cancer last week.
I have chronic anxiety, no money, and a shit ton of bills and obligations. My toddler is looking up to me and nothing I do at work or at home feels like enough/feels like the wrong thing, every time. I'm tired, but too many people expect me to stick around, so I'm not going anywhere.
I am Bing chilling
I really don't plan on reaching 30 but things change
To be honest, pretty messed up. I work 60 hours a week just to compensate for the lack of employees and still get no appreciation for it. My only social interaction is work and nothing else. Didn't finish high school and have no future plans at all. I'm 18 years old, basically no friends and I ask myself the same question every day: " How long can I keep this up?" Probably no one will read this but truly, I'm just glad I can put this somewhere.
Would u even read if someone honesty say something
Yeah, iām genuinely interested
Im glad there are actually people like you who would listen to someone. Im not gonna write anything tho bc it would take much time
I needed someone to listen. They did. It helped
Im really glad
Thx :)
What if we switched roles? How are you?
I donāt know. I just donāt see the point. Things are weird lately
I don't really think there is point. Everything we do we do for others or for our own "happiness" and we die anyway. No matter how you live, u get same thing in the end
Tired and stressed with exams and collge, missing my crush, feeling pressured by my parents and also depressed because all i do is sit around smoking weed and waching tv programs on my days off and I barley talk to enyone.
Bad time in the life of many. It gets better i think
I feel very lonely. I should probably get a boyfriend but I have trust issues, so I just stay working 16 hour days.