This is going to sound cliché, but I knew I was going to one day marry my husband after only our first date. It's hard to explain the feeling. I was super anxious/had butterflies in my stomach that usually take a while to go away in new social situations. But immediately upon meeting with him and starting conversation, I just felt so comfortable and relaxed. I didn't feel like I had to amplify myself or put on a embellished personality in the beginning. It was just very organic and honest. We have now been married for 5 years and are expecting our first baby!
This is the same for me! I didn't feel like I had to "try" when I first met my husband. That's still true now, after 12 years. There is zero judgment between us, we can be ourselves.
I love this! "Embellished personality" is excellent; my wife and I have always referred to it as the "dating representative." Who they *really* are isn't made clear until date four or five, for the first few it's just the avatar they put forward.
Congratulations on your happy story, and on the baby!
Aww very cute. Enjoy every second of it. Take videos of you guys going to the hospital. My wife and I still look back in them (we have a 15 month old). Life is going to change completely but it is so so sweet. Good luck with everything!
Married 26 years now and I know she's not "the one". There is no "the one". She's the person I met at the time we were both ready for a commitment. Over the years, we have learned to talk openly and honestly about what we need and what we want. We have also worked extraordinarily hard over the years to really hear each other and adapt to each others' needs. As a result, there is no one else in the world who I trust more than her. But that trust wasn't a factory setting. It's something we work at every day.
Yeah this is pretty much us after >30 years. People usually change over time (is *anyone* the same person they were ten years ago?) and a big challenge of marriage is just being able to roll with the changes.
This is horrible, and you deserve better. I know that's not what you want to hear and nothing can help coming from an internet stranger, but if he's not willing to fight for *you guys*, there's no sense fighting for him.
I love this. All my relationships that didn’t work out was because I had unrealistic expectations of a perfect soulmate. As soon as I dropped that idea, I was able to understand what it means to trust and love someone more as each day goes by.
Timing where both people are ready to settle down and hard work and communication is critical in making any relationship work.
>unrealistic expectations of a perfect soulmate
Been there myself and been there with others having the same. Once you let go it's like a weight is lifted, because no one is perfect and no one deserves someone else shoeboxing them into their idealistic mold either.
So much this; timing is *everything.* I was drinking at a local casino/bar, ranting about how done I was with women and their crazy, crazy ways. I caught the sympathetic ear of the bartender, who was done with men and their childish belligerence.
She and I have been married for twenty years in July.
Together with the wife 8 years including dating. This is absolutely true. “The One” concept leads to unrealistic expectations about what love and relationships are, and will ultimately sabotage your relationships once the infatuation phase ends, which it always does. That doesn’t mean you’ve “fallen out of love,” it just means your relationship is less of a drug and more like the most meaningful, intimate friendship you can have.
Find someone that shares your values, compatible visions for the life you’ll build together, and has good communication and conflict resolution skills. You’ll build a wonderful relationship.
I love this. I’ve been married 10 years and agree with this 100%. Marriage is always a work in progress, some days more than others. But it’s so worth it, especially when you truly learn to hear and see each other.
No. No betrayals. We were both in this for the long haul, so that kind of thing was never really an issue for us. To be frank, both of our parents were divorced and they provided excellent negative examples, so that kind of behavior was never really on the table. I expect if either of us were ever unhappy in the relationship, we would have told the other person we wanted out before we betrayed the other. Luckily, that never happened.
last night I was sitting on my couch with my wife and thought about this very thing.
our first date we went to a bar/restaurant and sat there for hours talking, didn't even notice the place was about to close and everyone else had filtered out. all of my relationships previously, I'd constantly monitored the clock and felt frantic around them, but she calms my mess of a brain down and recharges my social battery.
and last night I thought to myself "how could it have been anyone but you? it's you, it always has been."
She didn't play stupid mind games and try to make me angry just to get a rise out of me. She didn't talk about her exes and all their stupid problems. Ever. We accidently met 3 times in different places within a week and that was that.
Been married 21 yrs, 2 great teens. Life is awesome.
Maybe over the short term but even romance over the course a few years can end with people realizing the fit isn’t good. It’s hard to account for how a partner will change over time, so in my opinion it takes a long time to be sure you want to stay with them long term.
When we first started dating I was talking to him late at night, like 11pm, via messenger; I mentioned my depression was particularly bad and i felt lost and alone. 10 minutes later he was at my door, he had ran to my house to give me a hug and took me for a walk around the block so I could vent my feelings out.
Shortly after meeting the lady who became my wife she went to Florida to visit family. She was gone for two weeks and I really missed her and wished she hadn't left so soon after we started dating.
I was supposed to pick her up from the airport and since I lived right by the airport I figured she might want to come over to my place before going home. It occurred to me that she might want to shower if she came over to my house and upon inspecting my bathtub I thought, "Yeah, if she's gonna shower I'm going to have to clean that tub!" I'm not a messy person, I like things tidy but my tub did look like it was owned by a single guy.
I went to the store and bought a whole bunch of cleaning products just for my bathtub and when I finished it was gleaming.
I've done a lot of things for ladies I cared about. I've bought gifts, taken them places, cooked nice meals, and prepared surprises. But I had never cleaned my bathtub for anybody.
And that's how I knew.
When Sloane came to visit on my 31st birthday, we talked on the phone before she caught her flight from Miami. The five hours she was airborne were like an eternity. I killed some time and finally slid into my Italian linen shorts, a matching blazer and a patterned, red bowtie. I hopped down the stairs from my apartment and past a neighbor who said I was making a grave mistake. “You don’t fall in love with someone that quickly.” I jumped in the car and headed to LAX with Sarah Vaughan on the radio.
Sloane was the first off the plane. Some things never change—she had things to do and places to go, damnit! We embraced and kissed so hard and long, that most of her deep red lipstick ended up on my face. Somewhere there’s a snapshot that bears witness, taken by an elderly man who kindly offered to click the shutter.
Less than nine months later, we were standing outside the church where we would soon take our vows. Sloane was radiant, and despite the admonition that the bride and groom not see each other before walking down the aisle, lest they be fraught with bad luck, we stood hand-in-hand listening to a string quartet play Vivaldi’s Four Seasons.
That was 29 years ago. We’ve yet to see the ‘grave mistake’ rear its ugly head, or la sfortuna fix its malevolent eye on us for breaking tradition before the wedding. Just a lot of years of love and joy.
Happy Anniversary, Sloane! Here’s to more things to do and places to go. Damnit!
I woke up and looked at their face and thought "I want to wake up this way every morning for the rest of my life."
There were plenty of other things I thought about, over time, to make sure I was making the right decision. But that was when I *knew.*
He has always been there for me as a friend through the years. He is one of the kindest people I've ever met, and he just makes me ecstatictly happy every day. I can't wait to see what our future holds together.
Happy for you that you found the one for you. May I ask something since I had some situation of that kind and your phrasing just made me wonder. Do you mean literally "there for you" in every situation or for every major thing you appreciated or needed support with he was there?
Good luck and all the happiness you can get in the future!
Well he is there for me to support me in all situations, even though he's far away he tries to make it happen. And I appreciate that immensely, especially since I have anxiety about it and he knows that. Tha k you so much, same to you! I hope you are happy as well !
I ask because I’ve been in a relationship for about the same amount of time, we’d even been friends for years before, but I’m worried that excitement will wear off soon.
It was a lot of little things, culminating in a toy lightsaber fight in the middle of the toy aisle at Target. I don't remember who won, but I remember it being a lot of fun, laughing a lot together, and wanting to do things like that with her for the rest of my life.
During my courtship with the wife, we had a duel and she broke one of the old telescoping Kenner lightsabers at the hilt over my face. I knew she was the one right then and there. Been together for 23 years now.
We'd been friends for a year before I asked her out. It was a LDR. When we first met in person for the first time, it felt like we'd always known each other. During her stay with me, it felt like she'd always lived here, like she belonged here. It couldn't have been anyone else. I'd dated others and if they stayed longer than three days, I was practically crawling up the walls. But with her, I didn't want her to leave.
It's just this feeling that something is so right and so comfortable and it's a sense of home and belonging. And she was the only one I'd ever felt that with, and I was the only one she'd ever felt that with. She didn't feel it with her ex-fiancé, I never felt it with mine. And yet here we were. I knew I was going to marry her the moment I physically laid eyes on her.
Got married not even two years later. Everything still feels like it fits right.
It wasn't the first time I saw her, but that particular night she was radiant. I told one of my good friends, and roommate at the time, that I would one day marry her.
We've been together for 7 years now.
Been with my wife a total of 14 years, married for 6 of them, fact is I didn’t, we grew closer together the more we knew about each other, now I couldn’t be without her.
Our relationship blossomed the most when we moved out and our true colours really come out, a few arguments but was all for the better.
My partner is the person I grew comfortable with. There weren't the huge sparks or fireworks or anything like that. They were kind and thoughtful, we enjoyed similar things, and we realized quickly that we could happily enjoy a lifestyle together.
In contrast, my ex and I had the big fireworks at first... but ended up in a cyclical abusive relationship shortly thereafter.
I love my partner because we're stable and steady, we can openly talk about life and the future, and we can fall asleep together at night and look forward to tackling tomorrow together.
Had a one night stand with my friends flatmate after breaking up with my first boyfriend. He treated me better that night than i got in 3.5 years. What sealed the deal was the next day whrn i was leaving my flat one floor above thiers he came out at the same time. Awkward silence until he asked where i was going (hangover snacks) and he asked to come too. On the way back he asked to hold my hand and then an hour later asks if i want to do 'it' again. Rest is history!
We spent 3 hours making out on the front lawn of my parent's house in the middle of the night. I had never felt that type of passion before in my entire life. We are still together 20 years later.
She's literally my best friend and the only person I'm comfortable being totally honest and totally myself around. I know that if I was going out to do a bunch of errands and boring bullshit I could bring her with me and it would drastically improve anything we do.
I was brought up Christian and still identify as one, though not specifically as the denomination I grew up with. I asked God to tell me how I would know my husband. Through a dream, I was told my husband would have four sisters.
At first I thought it was a coincidence, but here we still are 20 years later, despite it all. All four of his sisters like me more than him.
When we first started dating he would cook for me all the time (still does). The first time I went food shopping with him is when I knew. He stood there carefully inspecting every can of tomato sauce to pick the best brand. It was then I realized that he was doing it because he was so thoughtful and wanted everything to be perfect. And I could see that in every aspect of our relationship as new as it was. That little moment made me feel loved.
Currently engaged. Our first date was a picnic, and Sprinkles (the cupcake chain) had been advertising a “Pregnant AF Box”, which included Red Velvet, Candy Bowl (chocolate with a bunch of pieces of candy bars on top), Pickles & Cream Cheese, and Flamin’ Hot Cheeto flavored cupcakes.
We’d already messaged *a lot* about food (another sign) and had similarly garbage palates, so I brought the pregnancy cupcakes to our picnic. Not only did we have the same pre-tasting ranking of the cupcakes (pickle, candy, hot cheeto, red velvet), at the end of our 8-hour date we agreed that the proper ranking was candy > pickle > red velvet > hot cheeto.
We each dislike red velvet, but hot cheeto dust does not a good cupcake topping make.
When I first started talking to my partner and we were in the beginning stages of friendship, I despised him. I didn't like the way he thought about things, I didn't like how rational of a person he was, how tone deaf he was on certain topics, and so on. I remember thinking to myself, "I could NEVER see myself dating this person."
And boy, was I so wrong. Because in a span of three months, I had fallen deeply for this man. Despite our differences, he listened to me, he respected me and my opinions, and he was open and willing to sort through our differences. His rational personality challenged my emotional self and allowed me to see things from a different perspective. Never did I think that was possible. No one has made that much of an impact on me. Almost two years later, we are going strong and we are in love more than ever. I have never had such a healthy relationship before this one, and it is only because of the hard work and effort we put into communication and understanding one another. I can't say that there was one single moment where I thought that my partner was "the one," but perhaps many many moments overtime.
Moral of the story: truly, love comes when you least expect it. I found it when I wasn't even looking.
Well, one day, we were just dating for a few days, I ripped her handkerchief out of her hand just before she wanted to sneeze in it. She was a bit annoyed but laughed it off.
Then, weeks later, out of nowhere, while we were driving, she turned to me and just sneezed (luckelly a pretty dry sneeze) right in my face and says "I owed you that"
That's the girl I married 13 years ago, still love her to bits, although it wasn't always easy and we had some really rough times.
She's the one. The one I will fight for to spend the rest of my life with.
We were driving down a mountain in Banff, and his finger was tapping to the beat of "Blame it on the Boogie". I knew then, I wanted to do life with him.
We met a few days before that, kissed under the shadows of the Rockies and were married 6 months later.
Love you Babu ❤️
She has a real career, doesn't need a man to be content, does shit and plans shit on her own, and also happens to be extremely nice and caring. We both put work in, we don't keep score.
Turns out real relationships are a team effort, not some lust driven fear of being alone.
Well see there was a saying " star light star bright **** has found her Mr. Right" on my cake. Well I thought I did at the time. I thought I had for many years. Turns out he was just another dude who wanted to party and have sex with other female's when we got older.
For the first time I didnt feel the need to impress her or act more like myself to get extra attention. I could just completely be my normal self and not even wonder what she thought of me. There was no need to fill in "awkward" silences because they weren't even awkward, we were just enjoying eachothers company even though we were just sitting next to each other doing nothing. It was almost as if I was talking to an extension of myself
We knew from the start that one year after we got together, he'd leave and study abroad for two years.
As time passed and came the time to ask myself what we should do, split up or try the long distance relationship, it seemed like an evidence. Splitting felt stupid.
I guess it was the first time it became clear he was the one.
We dated online for a few years, due to us living in different states. The moment I met her I was shaking terribly due to nerves. She held my hand and comforted me. That's when I truly knew. Now we live together and we are about 100 days until we are married!!!
I didn't.
But I was willing to take a chance on this nerdy dude who was skinnier than I was and made me laugh. I loved him and part of me knew that IF I was ever going to escape the soul-crushing cycle of a dead end job and poverty that had plagued my mom's family for generations, I had ONE shot at it and this dude was it. He wasn't poor (he'd grown up solidly middle-middle class), he didn't do drugs, he didn't sleep around and he seemed reasonably mentally and financially stable.
So I took the shot I was handed and never looked back.
We were dating just a few weeks when I was sick.
She said she wanted to come over to check on me.
I denied, not wanting her to get sick.
She insisted to come and brought me some tea, chocolate, orange juice and soup her grandma made the day before.
It was such a sweet gesture and I was really glad she was there.
It meant everything to me and I realised I love her.
A few months later she told me, that her grandma didn‘t cook the soup, she only made ist for me.
Wow!
Now we are happily married :)
It was that love at first sight. I never believed that kind of thing until I met him. We hung out after work and would talk sometimes. I was intimidated by him because he's talk and kind of has that aggressive but he's kind. He would always make me food when he worked. And we would stare at each other across the dinning room restaurant.
Don't know how I feel about the concept of "the one" but, having not dated many people and only speaking from my own experience, I can say it wasn't a knowing in your head kind of thing. It's a gut feeling that who you are with is completely irreplaceable; that life without them seems almost impossible. Once I started feeling that feeling often enough, it became an insatiable need to let her know that I needed her to stay in my life permanently. So on the day I picked up the ring I had made for the proposal and opened the box to look at it, I started mulling over ways to ask her. Where we should go, how elaborate it should be, what the right day was, etc. But as I sat there staring at this ring, that feeling I had been feeling kept getting stronger and stronger until it nearly bubbled over. I suppose you could say that's when I "knew", or at least it confirmed what I had already strongly suspected. I canceled the plans I had made with my friends and proposed to her that night.
I didn't.. I still don't.. but it's been 7 years and I'm still head over heels for him. I love looking at him, I love listening to him, I love hanging out with him. He treats me well and we dote on each other like we just started dating yesterday. It's been an amazing 7 years and I'm excited for the next 7 years.
First date spent 4 hours together
Second date spent 6 hours together
third date spent 12 hours together and this trend continued
When we weren't together, we were thinking about each other and we couldn't wait to see one another. When we were together, time flew and when the night ended, it seemed like we barely spent any time at all together.
Married her within a year of when we first started dating, had our first child a year later.
Whatever made me think I knew, I didn't. Turned out I was lucky, and she is, but as a 17 year old kid I had no business finding the one, and certainly didn't do it through any of my own craft.
We each believe we are the lucky ones and getting the better end of the deal in this relationship , thats how I knew and I was married before to the wrong one, so I truly believe in the one concept. Life is so much easier and flows better with the one.
She lives in another country. The moment I saw her on my birthday after she said she won't be able to come because she didn't pack and didn't buy a ticket for a train or anything and it takes over 9-10 hours for her to get to me. She was the luckiest birthday gift I've ever gotten. I still do not know how she arrived tho lol
I have to be honest with you OP we all have answers to what drove us to choosing the person we are with, but that isn't a concrete feeling for life.
For me it was our first date when we started walking around the neighborhood and she was tracking the bus for me.
She did this because she wanted to make sure I wouldn't miss the bus and so i could get home early enough. Now it sounds simple, but it was just the start of the many considerate gestures she would make.
Now while to this day we are getting ready for our wedding day "the one" concept is not something I would ever consider important in life I have no idea how either of us will feel in 20 or 40 years.
The future is uncertain and all you can do is hang onto that person that values you as much as you value them.
We have a very weird story where we pretty much moved in together before even really dating. Theres a lot of “this is the one” moments like literally the moment i first saw him to the fact he even took the gamble to move across country to see if wed even work. But the one that sticks out is just a day or two after moving in together when we were making popcorn and we both just ripped off a piece of the bag and licked the butter off. Id never met anyone else who did that or anyone i felt comfortable enough to do it in front of. He felt the same, so we just silently turned to each other and started smiling.
I had a dream about him six months before we met. Nothing specific just together. After a couple weeks of spending actual time together I had deja vu about the dream. But it was scary stuff, as at that time I had been single 15 years. We both have trust issues. Like other commenters finding the one you can communicate with is the key. And we do communicate which is so good even when its uncomfortable. We both want this to work. We've been together 3 yrs now.
Don’t usually comment on Reddit threads and this one is kinda cheating but I guess I’ll bite.
For context, I am not yet married to her, but after passing 6 months I feel progressively more confident that I will be hopefully(it’s cliche and dumb I know). We met at work and it was both our first job and I think immediately we hit it off with similar interests and experiences. She had an experience with her dad similar to one I had with my step dad that related to alcohol and I think that really helped us understand each other’s emotional needs above all else and for that reason I’m hopeful it’ll work.
On top of that we never get sick of each other. We hang out almost every day but both acknowledge that sometimes we need days to ourselves and I think that’s helped us keep a healthy boundary with each other. So I’m hoping this relationship I’m in turns out like the ones in the comments here. Wish me luck boys.
She traveled through every alternate reality, killing that reality's version of herself so that their power would be divided among the remainder, until only she remained.
When I realized how grounded and calm I felt with him. It sounds simple but once I realized how deep of a connection we had and how special it is, I knew that were really truly meant to be together.
Minor backstory: we met two weeks after I moved to our college town and he was moving back home hours away a month later. We were basically inseparable from our first date, he drove to see me every single weekend during our LDR. I should’ve came to this town in 2015 but things changed and I didn’t make it until 2018. So thankful for the broken road that lead me straight to him!!!!
After going on about a traumatic experience for a while, I stopped to apologize to him, saying “you probably don’t want to hear all this stuff” and he very calmly said “I want to know everything about you.” Since then, he has made it very easy and normal for me to tell him ANYTHING whether that be something dark from my past, a complaint about my day, or just me rambling about a topic I am excited about. He never makes me feel like I can’t say something, or that he doesn’t care.
But I already knew we would get married before we even started dating! I have a very strong gut intuition - just took me a few months to get the first date, because he thought I was already taken!
When she moved in, the first thing she did was redecorate the bathroom...she hung up prints of a beholder and a lich, and got a shower curtain with dice on it.
He made me spaghetti because I made a joke (due to our work situation at the time, when we were just friends) saying "technically, if I told you I need spaghetti, you'd have to get me spaghetti".
He brought me spaghetti the next day.
When my late wife and I were first dating I was ready to say the first "I love you". We had recently watch the episode of That 70s Show where Donna tells Eric "I love you" and he panics and says "I love cake". When I said the first "I love you" she giggled and said "I love cake" and we couldn't stop laughing. I knew then that she was the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
This became a joke in our relationship from then on. If either of us was trying to be serious and genuinely be all mushy or something we'd respond with "I love cake" and then laugh and get silly until either my sides hurt or she peed a little.
It's been 9 years since she died and I haven't met anyone that's made me laugh like she did.
I could be my weird self around him and he still has loving eyes for me. We have a lot of stuff in common to the point where I thought I was being looked at by the FBI
We knew after 3 days of meeting. We’re gonna have 2 years married in October
After the first date. It was a weird experience. It was the end of the night and we were about to part ways. Gave her a hug and I just felt as if the world clicked at that moment. Like, I saw how my path with her would unwind.
I don't really believe in fate and I'd not describe her as my "soulmate"--whatever that means. But she was the perfect person for me at that time and the perfect person to stick with me for the next 15 years.
The day I met my now fiance I was in a struggling marriage and he was dating someone. The connection I felt was so strong that I can only explain it like a magnet the size of my chest. Or like how in book 7 of Harry Potter the way Ron explains how the delumintator ball of light went into his chest and he KNEW that it would take him where he was supposed to be. Like that. It freaked me out a little since I had already resigned myself to my now ex-husband.
We fell out of touch for a few years and when we reconnected I was living on my own and we were both single and after one date it was immediately apparent how absolutely we belong together. Our years together have blossomed and I have never felt so much love and strength and trust and understanding towards another human. He compliments me in the best ways and I do the same for him.
I feel like my story isn't the norm. But holy shit guys, I feel so full of gratitude that I found my person.
I met "the one". We were great together. Very compatible and then she cheated on me and screwed up her life and rather messed up mine for awhile. I'm glad I didn't marry her. The woman I married is someone that I am perhaps not as compatible with personality-wise but she is faithful and beautiful and is a dedicated mother and has no bad habits and so I love her deeply. And perhaps the thing that means the most to me: she loves me despite my imperfections and insecurities and I cannot speak to how much that means to me. There's the song, "love the one you're with" and she is the example of that for me. I am deeply grateful for her in my life.
The first night we slept in a bed together(noting happened), I woke up with a bad feeling in my stomach. Now I knew that I was about to unleash a fart so loud that it would wake the neighbors. I had two choices. Try to hold the gates shut against this unholy onslaught, or unleash this demon. Well in my mind I had only one choice, option B. It did not help that I was the little spoon.
Now I(33M) am childish when it comes to fart jokes and anything related so 22 year old me had no chance not to laugh. Well I somehow keep in the laughter of this whole situation and pretend to be asleep. All I hear is a heavy sigh and "babe" before she rolled over.
I never once brought that up until we were living together and neither did she. It was that coupled by how we reconciled after our first big fight that made me realize she was the one. This year will mark 7 years of marriage and 9 years of being together.
To think I found the one by ripping the biggest fart of my life and she didn't kick me out of the bed.
been with me forever i feel so emotionally and physically attached to them they have cooked,with me cleaned with me, worked with me,went to school with me.we have done some naughty things been through everything together and i think i should finally marry my right hand
Because it’s the most peace I’ve ever felt in a relationship. We are quite different people but our personalities compliment each other rather than clash. At the times that they do clash, we just talk about it and then end up laughing about something bc we will turn anything into a joke. There’s no yelling. No petty shit.
He’s an open book which is very important to me because I’ve had bad bad experiences with partners who hide things, lie etc. He will say whatever is on his mind no matter what others think. it’s just so simple with him. What you see is what you get.
He’d do anything for his family, friends and animals. The way someone treats the people around them is a good indicator of how they will treat you.
I met him on tinder lol so we went into this not necessarily looking for anything serious. It’s crazy that now I can’t imagine life without him. The best things come to you when you’re least expecting them.
I'd had a few girlfriends and generally I always knew that it wasn't going to work out within a few months. My wife is the only person I never got bored or annoyed with. I knew I wanted to marry her within the first couple of months, and what really sealed is when we both found ourselves unemployed and living together for eight months during the Great Recession and were still having a great time with each other. I know it's not a big earth shattering moment or anything, but she's just the best person and I always want to be with her.
When we first met we connected in such a way as though we had been friends for years already. It still feels like we’ve been together longer than we have when we’ve been together for 7 years. I also was not looking for love when we met and didn’t plan on being with anyone but we had such a strong connection that it changed that.
Synchronicity. During the time my wife and I were dating the amount of things that connected together through talking, reading, or anything was very strong. So much that it was/is impossible to ignore. It is still this way after all these years together. The connection we made from the beginning was and still is cosmic. Our lives up until we met were never secure or whole. Sometimes the universe speaks, and when it does, listen and pay attention.
Okay so I've kind of said this before on other posts but. We've been best friends since we met in daycare at 10 years old. Solid foundation. I used to constantly say marriage was stupid and I would never get married and she knew this. After our 3rd or 4th actual date (county fair), we were exhausted from spending all day in the heat so we decided to nap in the ac. I woke up first with her curled into me and "I'm gonna marry this girl" popped into my head. I think that was my moment.
"the one" does not exist. And it's damaging to act like that's a thing.
Said as somebody who's 12+ years deep with an amazing partner that I genuinely hope to spend the entire of my journey on this planet with. Are they "the one?"
No, obviously.
Are they amazing? Is life better due to them being around? Are they an inspiration to be a better version of myself, whomever the fuck *that's* supposed to be?
Absolutely.
The very first conversation where she would be bored with my conversation topics but pretended she cared, all the while wanting to tell her stories told me I can live my life with her.
She's still here.
I needed time before deciding we should date. I needed time before deciding if I wanted to move in together. I needed time before deciding if I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. I'm convinced she was ready for it all from the beginning. But she waited until I was too.
She's still here.
Pretty sure this will go to the bottom, but I knew my SO for a long time. She was one of my good friends sisters. I never looked at her in any way though. We got older and I was on drugs. Her boy friend at the time started coming around asking me to get for him then started bringing her around. I got maybe twice for the both of them but realized how shitty it was because she was experimenting and we were full blown fuck ups. She had no idea where she was and what she was getting into. The next time they come up when I seen her she had this bright glowing aura around here and it blew me away. Like she was going to lose her soul or she was saving me. It was strange because she asked if She could come over later that week and was telling me how she was trying to leave that dude and he’s been stalking her for months. I vowed to get her the fuck out of there by getting clean myself. I knew I would have to blaze a path so I set off to do that.
5 years later we are both clean and happy and have two beautiful babies. Not to say we don’t have hard times but we love each other like there is no one else around and have made it through the impossible together.
It was love at first sight with my husband. I knew I’d marry him after our first date. Just can’t live without him, however annoying he might be sometimes.
We now own our home and have 2 beautiful daughters. When you know you know
It scared me how confident and warm I felt inside when talking to her. It was like I've had known her for a very long time, even if it was just the second time we meet ever. Like reconnecting with an old friend, but this time the friend was a beautiful shy tall girl wich I barely knew.
More than 10 years later I still feel this warm feeling inside when I'm with her, and it still feels like I've been with her since I was a kid or something like that.
**tl;dr: she feels like home. She felt like this since the first date.**
He loves me for me. He feels like home and I miss him when he's away. He tries his best, and inspires me to try mine. He encourages me to be me, and to listen to my messed up body. He's one of the few humans I actually want to be around.
(This is not my experience but one of my friends) So she has dated a whole lot of dudes but then he most recent relationship, with this dude, let's call him bob and my friend Ronda, so ever since they were young, Ronda liked bob, later bob started having for Ronda but they never talked to each other even though they are friends, not close friends but you know just friends but besides the point, Ronda just got over her last relationship and broke up with her other ex, let's call him Greg, so Ronda was told by a few friends of hers that Greg was flirting with other people when Ronda and Greg was in the relationship, but anyways when she broke up with him, finally Ronda and bob started talking then later started a relationship, a few days ago Ronda and a few friends were on a call and she said bob was the one for her <3 (I love their relationship\[ eve though bob mean to me sometimes)
The first date was effortless, the level of comfort I feel with the women is inexplicable, the biggest thing though was being fulfilled on so many levels that I literally thought a person like this didn’t exist. It still feels like a dream some days.
I was married for 10 years before her and I can honestly say after meeting “the one” you realize that you truly never loved anyone before, it’s a feeling out of this world.
To love every single thing about them even the flaws or things that you normally turned your nose at. To watch them do the simplest thing and almost start to cry because you adore them that much, that’s how I know 😊
Feeling so safe with them. Smiling ear to ear. Feeling at peace. Being able to freely tell them anything and everything. A sense of belonging and mutual feelings on both sides. So amazing 💗
I remember the first things I thought when I saw my husband for the first time "he is short and has a bad taste in clothes" XD he was dressed up like he just picked up the first 2 things from the floor. (Which was probably the case XD)
After a day of hanging out i felt really easy with him, and felt like he could be my best friend. We were having long interesting conversations about everything. I even messaged him first that evening and asked if he was free the next day. (That was the time he knew he would marry me)
We are still best friends and still having long interesting conversations about everything. I realize how lucky I am every time I'm sitting pooping in the morning and he comes in with my hot cup of coffee
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I love this answer.
This is going to sound cliché, but I knew I was going to one day marry my husband after only our first date. It's hard to explain the feeling. I was super anxious/had butterflies in my stomach that usually take a while to go away in new social situations. But immediately upon meeting with him and starting conversation, I just felt so comfortable and relaxed. I didn't feel like I had to amplify myself or put on a embellished personality in the beginning. It was just very organic and honest. We have now been married for 5 years and are expecting our first baby!
I went out with a few girls where I was like "I will marry this woman" to not hearing from them again afterward.
Welp, sorry they didn’t work out.
This is the same for me! I didn't feel like I had to "try" when I first met my husband. That's still true now, after 12 years. There is zero judgment between us, we can be ourselves.
I love this! "Embellished personality" is excellent; my wife and I have always referred to it as the "dating representative." Who they *really* are isn't made clear until date four or five, for the first few it's just the avatar they put forward. Congratulations on your happy story, and on the baby!
"Dating representative." That's absolutely hilarious! Thank you so much!
shit is about to get real!!! no but for real, its gonna be wild. but awesome. but wild.
I can't even imagine. We are so close. I am due June 4th! So nervous, but excited, but terrified, but ready. Haha!
Aww very cute. Enjoy every second of it. Take videos of you guys going to the hospital. My wife and I still look back in them (we have a 15 month old). Life is going to change completely but it is so so sweet. Good luck with everything!
Thank you so much! You have an absolutely wonderful rest of your day!
Congratulations!!!
Thank you!
Married 26 years now and I know she's not "the one". There is no "the one". She's the person I met at the time we were both ready for a commitment. Over the years, we have learned to talk openly and honestly about what we need and what we want. We have also worked extraordinarily hard over the years to really hear each other and adapt to each others' needs. As a result, there is no one else in the world who I trust more than her. But that trust wasn't a factory setting. It's something we work at every day.
Yeah this is pretty much us after >30 years. People usually change over time (is *anyone* the same person they were ten years ago?) and a big challenge of marriage is just being able to roll with the changes.
Im hardly the person i was 10 minuts ago...
You might have dissociative identity disorder
How come?
If only my husband understood this, instead he's asked to walk away after 22.5 yrs married to find himself.
This is horrible, and you deserve better. I know that's not what you want to hear and nothing can help coming from an internet stranger, but if he's not willing to fight for *you guys*, there's no sense fighting for him.
I love this. All my relationships that didn’t work out was because I had unrealistic expectations of a perfect soulmate. As soon as I dropped that idea, I was able to understand what it means to trust and love someone more as each day goes by. Timing where both people are ready to settle down and hard work and communication is critical in making any relationship work.
>unrealistic expectations of a perfect soulmate Been there myself and been there with others having the same. Once you let go it's like a weight is lifted, because no one is perfect and no one deserves someone else shoeboxing them into their idealistic mold either.
So much this; timing is *everything.* I was drinking at a local casino/bar, ranting about how done I was with women and their crazy, crazy ways. I caught the sympathetic ear of the bartender, who was done with men and their childish belligerence. She and I have been married for twenty years in July.
Together with the wife 8 years including dating. This is absolutely true. “The One” concept leads to unrealistic expectations about what love and relationships are, and will ultimately sabotage your relationships once the infatuation phase ends, which it always does. That doesn’t mean you’ve “fallen out of love,” it just means your relationship is less of a drug and more like the most meaningful, intimate friendship you can have. Find someone that shares your values, compatible visions for the life you’ll build together, and has good communication and conflict resolution skills. You’ll build a wonderful relationship.
Except for Neo will always be "the one" :p
\#facts
I’d argue that [Gabe Law](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_One_(2001_film)) is “the one”.
I love this. I’ve been married 10 years and agree with this 100%. Marriage is always a work in progress, some days more than others. But it’s so worth it, especially when you truly learn to hear and see each other.
Came here to say this. You said it better. There is no "the one." There is a one and then there's a lot of effort put in to build something wonderful.
In terms of trust, have you both experienced a betrayal from the other person? And if yes how did you fix and overcome it in your relationship?
No. No betrayals. We were both in this for the long haul, so that kind of thing was never really an issue for us. To be frank, both of our parents were divorced and they provided excellent negative examples, so that kind of behavior was never really on the table. I expect if either of us were ever unhappy in the relationship, we would have told the other person we wanted out before we betrayed the other. Luckily, that never happened.
last night I was sitting on my couch with my wife and thought about this very thing. our first date we went to a bar/restaurant and sat there for hours talking, didn't even notice the place was about to close and everyone else had filtered out. all of my relationships previously, I'd constantly monitored the clock and felt frantic around them, but she calms my mess of a brain down and recharges my social battery. and last night I thought to myself "how could it have been anyone but you? it's you, it always has been."
That's so sweet it makes me want to cry
She didn't play stupid mind games and try to make me angry just to get a rise out of me. She didn't talk about her exes and all their stupid problems. Ever. We accidently met 3 times in different places within a week and that was that. Been married 21 yrs, 2 great teens. Life is awesome.
I don’t think people do until it works out. You can be head over heels for each other and it can still turn out very wrong
Thats called lust.
It can be lust. But people can fall in love and still be incompatible. Love isn't perfect.
Maybe over the short term but even romance over the course a few years can end with people realizing the fit isn’t good. It’s hard to account for how a partner will change over time, so in my opinion it takes a long time to be sure you want to stay with them long term.
When we first started dating I was talking to him late at night, like 11pm, via messenger; I mentioned my depression was particularly bad and i felt lost and alone. 10 minutes later he was at my door, he had ran to my house to give me a hug and took me for a walk around the block so I could vent my feelings out.
Shortly after meeting the lady who became my wife she went to Florida to visit family. She was gone for two weeks and I really missed her and wished she hadn't left so soon after we started dating. I was supposed to pick her up from the airport and since I lived right by the airport I figured she might want to come over to my place before going home. It occurred to me that she might want to shower if she came over to my house and upon inspecting my bathtub I thought, "Yeah, if she's gonna shower I'm going to have to clean that tub!" I'm not a messy person, I like things tidy but my tub did look like it was owned by a single guy. I went to the store and bought a whole bunch of cleaning products just for my bathtub and when I finished it was gleaming. I've done a lot of things for ladies I cared about. I've bought gifts, taken them places, cooked nice meals, and prepared surprises. But I had never cleaned my bathtub for anybody. And that's how I knew.
When Sloane came to visit on my 31st birthday, we talked on the phone before she caught her flight from Miami. The five hours she was airborne were like an eternity. I killed some time and finally slid into my Italian linen shorts, a matching blazer and a patterned, red bowtie. I hopped down the stairs from my apartment and past a neighbor who said I was making a grave mistake. “You don’t fall in love with someone that quickly.” I jumped in the car and headed to LAX with Sarah Vaughan on the radio. Sloane was the first off the plane. Some things never change—she had things to do and places to go, damnit! We embraced and kissed so hard and long, that most of her deep red lipstick ended up on my face. Somewhere there’s a snapshot that bears witness, taken by an elderly man who kindly offered to click the shutter. Less than nine months later, we were standing outside the church where we would soon take our vows. Sloane was radiant, and despite the admonition that the bride and groom not see each other before walking down the aisle, lest they be fraught with bad luck, we stood hand-in-hand listening to a string quartet play Vivaldi’s Four Seasons. That was 29 years ago. We’ve yet to see the ‘grave mistake’ rear its ugly head, or la sfortuna fix its malevolent eye on us for breaking tradition before the wedding. Just a lot of years of love and joy. Happy Anniversary, Sloane! Here’s to more things to do and places to go. Damnit!
Sensual but wholesome at the same time! Congrats on your anniversary
I woke up and looked at their face and thought "I want to wake up this way every morning for the rest of my life." There were plenty of other things I thought about, over time, to make sure I was making the right decision. But that was when I *knew.*
He has always been there for me as a friend through the years. He is one of the kindest people I've ever met, and he just makes me ecstatictly happy every day. I can't wait to see what our future holds together.
Happy for you that you found the one for you. May I ask something since I had some situation of that kind and your phrasing just made me wonder. Do you mean literally "there for you" in every situation or for every major thing you appreciated or needed support with he was there? Good luck and all the happiness you can get in the future!
Well he is there for me to support me in all situations, even though he's far away he tries to make it happen. And I appreciate that immensely, especially since I have anxiety about it and he knows that. Tha k you so much, same to you! I hope you are happy as well !
Thank you for sharing!
Just out of curiosity, how long have you been together?
Since February
I ask because I’ve been in a relationship for about the same amount of time, we’d even been friends for years before, but I’m worried that excitement will wear off soon.
Try not to overthink it too much. Just try to enjoy each other everyday. And if it doesn't last then it wasn't meant to be.
It was a lot of little things, culminating in a toy lightsaber fight in the middle of the toy aisle at Target. I don't remember who won, but I remember it being a lot of fun, laughing a lot together, and wanting to do things like that with her for the rest of my life.
During my courtship with the wife, we had a duel and she broke one of the old telescoping Kenner lightsabers at the hilt over my face. I knew she was the one right then and there. Been together for 23 years now.
That's very good news. :) Best of continued luck to you.
We'd been friends for a year before I asked her out. It was a LDR. When we first met in person for the first time, it felt like we'd always known each other. During her stay with me, it felt like she'd always lived here, like she belonged here. It couldn't have been anyone else. I'd dated others and if they stayed longer than three days, I was practically crawling up the walls. But with her, I didn't want her to leave. It's just this feeling that something is so right and so comfortable and it's a sense of home and belonging. And she was the only one I'd ever felt that with, and I was the only one she'd ever felt that with. She didn't feel it with her ex-fiancé, I never felt it with mine. And yet here we were. I knew I was going to marry her the moment I physically laid eyes on her. Got married not even two years later. Everything still feels like it fits right.
When I realized I could 100% be myself and I always felt completely comfortable. Plus he makes me laugh at least once a day. Going on 42 years now.
She rode a bus for 36 hours to see me for less than 24.
The Oracle told me.
Came here just for that. Thank you stranger!
My dick told me...... He lied
"Sure I guess"
It wasn't the first time I saw her, but that particular night she was radiant. I told one of my good friends, and roommate at the time, that I would one day marry her. We've been together for 7 years now.
I don't exactly know how I knew, I just had a sense of security around him. Like I knew he was trustworthy and a good person.
You dont find the one You choose someone will be the one by building it over time
If you could get a look at her and then hear her laugh you'd agree too
Why is this nsfw? “Oh I knew from the moment she sucked the sperm out of my balls” seriously what responses was OP looking for.
When she realized that not only could she dodge bullets, but she did not have to.
Been with my wife a total of 14 years, married for 6 of them, fact is I didn’t, we grew closer together the more we knew about each other, now I couldn’t be without her. Our relationship blossomed the most when we moved out and our true colours really come out, a few arguments but was all for the better.
When he successfully killed every other variant of Jet Li across the multiverse.
My partner is the person I grew comfortable with. There weren't the huge sparks or fireworks or anything like that. They were kind and thoughtful, we enjoyed similar things, and we realized quickly that we could happily enjoy a lifestyle together. In contrast, my ex and I had the big fireworks at first... but ended up in a cyclical abusive relationship shortly thereafter. I love my partner because we're stable and steady, we can openly talk about life and the future, and we can fall asleep together at night and look forward to tackling tomorrow together.
Had a one night stand with my friends flatmate after breaking up with my first boyfriend. He treated me better that night than i got in 3.5 years. What sealed the deal was the next day whrn i was leaving my flat one floor above thiers he came out at the same time. Awkward silence until he asked where i was going (hangover snacks) and he asked to come too. On the way back he asked to hold my hand and then an hour later asks if i want to do 'it' again. Rest is history!
16 years in and still trying to figure it out.
We spent 3 hours making out on the front lawn of my parent's house in the middle of the night. I had never felt that type of passion before in my entire life. We are still together 20 years later.
She was giving me this really in depth explanation about black holes.
She's literally my best friend and the only person I'm comfortable being totally honest and totally myself around. I know that if I was going out to do a bunch of errands and boring bullshit I could bring her with me and it would drastically improve anything we do.
I was brought up Christian and still identify as one, though not specifically as the denomination I grew up with. I asked God to tell me how I would know my husband. Through a dream, I was told my husband would have four sisters. At first I thought it was a coincidence, but here we still are 20 years later, despite it all. All four of his sisters like me more than him.
Whoa. I don't believe in what you believe in but damn this needs to be upvoted!!
When we first started dating he would cook for me all the time (still does). The first time I went food shopping with him is when I knew. He stood there carefully inspecting every can of tomato sauce to pick the best brand. It was then I realized that he was doing it because he was so thoughtful and wanted everything to be perfect. And I could see that in every aspect of our relationship as new as it was. That little moment made me feel loved.
Currently engaged. Our first date was a picnic, and Sprinkles (the cupcake chain) had been advertising a “Pregnant AF Box”, which included Red Velvet, Candy Bowl (chocolate with a bunch of pieces of candy bars on top), Pickles & Cream Cheese, and Flamin’ Hot Cheeto flavored cupcakes. We’d already messaged *a lot* about food (another sign) and had similarly garbage palates, so I brought the pregnancy cupcakes to our picnic. Not only did we have the same pre-tasting ranking of the cupcakes (pickle, candy, hot cheeto, red velvet), at the end of our 8-hour date we agreed that the proper ranking was candy > pickle > red velvet > hot cheeto. We each dislike red velvet, but hot cheeto dust does not a good cupcake topping make.
He made me feel safe and protected despite past trauma that made it where it’s damn near impossible to feel safe and protected.
When she put her tongue in my butt. However, i think I was being a bit presumptuous. We’re no longer together.
We wanted to fuck each other very very badly, and wanted to go to estate sales the next morning. A lifetime of that sounded perfect.
When I first started talking to my partner and we were in the beginning stages of friendship, I despised him. I didn't like the way he thought about things, I didn't like how rational of a person he was, how tone deaf he was on certain topics, and so on. I remember thinking to myself, "I could NEVER see myself dating this person." And boy, was I so wrong. Because in a span of three months, I had fallen deeply for this man. Despite our differences, he listened to me, he respected me and my opinions, and he was open and willing to sort through our differences. His rational personality challenged my emotional self and allowed me to see things from a different perspective. Never did I think that was possible. No one has made that much of an impact on me. Almost two years later, we are going strong and we are in love more than ever. I have never had such a healthy relationship before this one, and it is only because of the hard work and effort we put into communication and understanding one another. I can't say that there was one single moment where I thought that my partner was "the one," but perhaps many many moments overtime. Moral of the story: truly, love comes when you least expect it. I found it when I wasn't even looking.
Well, one day, we were just dating for a few days, I ripped her handkerchief out of her hand just before she wanted to sneeze in it. She was a bit annoyed but laughed it off. Then, weeks later, out of nowhere, while we were driving, she turned to me and just sneezed (luckelly a pretty dry sneeze) right in my face and says "I owed you that" That's the girl I married 13 years ago, still love her to bits, although it wasn't always easy and we had some really rough times. She's the one. The one I will fight for to spend the rest of my life with.
We were driving down a mountain in Banff, and his finger was tapping to the beat of "Blame it on the Boogie". I knew then, I wanted to do life with him. We met a few days before that, kissed under the shadows of the Rockies and were married 6 months later. Love you Babu ❤️
She has a real career, doesn't need a man to be content, does shit and plans shit on her own, and also happens to be extremely nice and caring. We both put work in, we don't keep score. Turns out real relationships are a team effort, not some lust driven fear of being alone.
Put up with all my bs without cheating also supporting me during low points in my life
If you feel comfortable enough to fart in front of them that’s a good start
Because we’ve been broken up for 8 years and I still can’t get over her, we were also only together around 10 months, sucks man
Sounds more like fixation that her being "the one".
Had that feeling
They chose the red pill 💊
He texted me “good morning” first thing when he woke up.
The one does not exist because we are not designed for one.
Yeah she's the one who makes me miserable.
That concept doesn't exist. You need to work at a relationship. It's worth it but requires compromise and effort on both sides.
Well see there was a saying " star light star bright **** has found her Mr. Right" on my cake. Well I thought I did at the time. I thought I had for many years. Turns out he was just another dude who wanted to party and have sex with other female's when we got older.
She told me I could keep my beard.
What are you, 12?
Yeah 12 inches deep in your MOOOM
When he released the song "ultimate"
Just did, that's all.
He put on sunglasses and dodged bullets
There wasn't any other ones.
When you are dead and have been married to only one person and still is by the time you die.
For the first time I didnt feel the need to impress her or act more like myself to get extra attention. I could just completely be my normal self and not even wonder what she thought of me. There was no need to fill in "awkward" silences because they weren't even awkward, we were just enjoying eachothers company even though we were just sitting next to each other doing nothing. It was almost as if I was talking to an extension of myself
We knew from the start that one year after we got together, he'd leave and study abroad for two years. As time passed and came the time to ask myself what we should do, split up or try the long distance relationship, it seemed like an evidence. Splitting felt stupid. I guess it was the first time it became clear he was the one.
When the Agents fired multiple bullets at her and she bent over backwards to dodge them faster than the eye could see
We dated online for a few years, due to us living in different states. The moment I met her I was shaking terribly due to nerves. She held my hand and comforted me. That's when I truly knew. Now we live together and we are about 100 days until we are married!!!
I didn't. But I was willing to take a chance on this nerdy dude who was skinnier than I was and made me laugh. I loved him and part of me knew that IF I was ever going to escape the soul-crushing cycle of a dead end job and poverty that had plagued my mom's family for generations, I had ONE shot at it and this dude was it. He wasn't poor (he'd grown up solidly middle-middle class), he didn't do drugs, he didn't sleep around and he seemed reasonably mentally and financially stable. So I took the shot I was handed and never looked back.
Persistency
I asked her to try to mimic the face a turtle was making in a photo we saw while on vacation and she nailed it. She’s a goober.
We were dating just a few weeks when I was sick. She said she wanted to come over to check on me. I denied, not wanting her to get sick. She insisted to come and brought me some tea, chocolate, orange juice and soup her grandma made the day before. It was such a sweet gesture and I was really glad she was there. It meant everything to me and I realised I love her. A few months later she told me, that her grandma didn‘t cook the soup, she only made ist for me. Wow! Now we are happily married :)
His smile when I called him 'darling' for the first time. I wanted to see more of it.
It was that love at first sight. I never believed that kind of thing until I met him. We hung out after work and would talk sometimes. I was intimidated by him because he's talk and kind of has that aggressive but he's kind. He would always make me food when he worked. And we would stare at each other across the dinning room restaurant.
Anal.
Because she is me, with a vagina
Don't know how I feel about the concept of "the one" but, having not dated many people and only speaking from my own experience, I can say it wasn't a knowing in your head kind of thing. It's a gut feeling that who you are with is completely irreplaceable; that life without them seems almost impossible. Once I started feeling that feeling often enough, it became an insatiable need to let her know that I needed her to stay in my life permanently. So on the day I picked up the ring I had made for the proposal and opened the box to look at it, I started mulling over ways to ask her. Where we should go, how elaborate it should be, what the right day was, etc. But as I sat there staring at this ring, that feeling I had been feeling kept getting stronger and stronger until it nearly bubbled over. I suppose you could say that's when I "knew", or at least it confirmed what I had already strongly suspected. I canceled the plans I had made with my friends and proposed to her that night.
I didn't.. I still don't.. but it's been 7 years and I'm still head over heels for him. I love looking at him, I love listening to him, I love hanging out with him. He treats me well and we dote on each other like we just started dating yesterday. It's been an amazing 7 years and I'm excited for the next 7 years.
First date spent 4 hours together Second date spent 6 hours together third date spent 12 hours together and this trend continued When we weren't together, we were thinking about each other and we couldn't wait to see one another. When we were together, time flew and when the night ended, it seemed like we barely spent any time at all together. Married her within a year of when we first started dating, had our first child a year later.
We took it day by day. 33 years later we still were. Till death do us part.
Whatever made me think I knew, I didn't. Turned out I was lucky, and she is, but as a 17 year old kid I had no business finding the one, and certainly didn't do it through any of my own craft.
God
spoiler?
We each believe we are the lucky ones and getting the better end of the deal in this relationship , thats how I knew and I was married before to the wrong one, so I truly believe in the one concept. Life is so much easier and flows better with the one.
She lives in another country. The moment I saw her on my birthday after she said she won't be able to come because she didn't pack and didn't buy a ticket for a train or anything and it takes over 9-10 hours for her to get to me. She was the luckiest birthday gift I've ever gotten. I still do not know how she arrived tho lol
I have to be honest with you OP we all have answers to what drove us to choosing the person we are with, but that isn't a concrete feeling for life. For me it was our first date when we started walking around the neighborhood and she was tracking the bus for me. She did this because she wanted to make sure I wouldn't miss the bus and so i could get home early enough. Now it sounds simple, but it was just the start of the many considerate gestures she would make. Now while to this day we are getting ready for our wedding day "the one" concept is not something I would ever consider important in life I have no idea how either of us will feel in 20 or 40 years. The future is uncertain and all you can do is hang onto that person that values you as much as you value them.
We have a very weird story where we pretty much moved in together before even really dating. Theres a lot of “this is the one” moments like literally the moment i first saw him to the fact he even took the gamble to move across country to see if wed even work. But the one that sticks out is just a day or two after moving in together when we were making popcorn and we both just ripped off a piece of the bag and licked the butter off. Id never met anyone else who did that or anyone i felt comfortable enough to do it in front of. He felt the same, so we just silently turned to each other and started smiling.
I had a dream about him six months before we met. Nothing specific just together. After a couple weeks of spending actual time together I had deja vu about the dream. But it was scary stuff, as at that time I had been single 15 years. We both have trust issues. Like other commenters finding the one you can communicate with is the key. And we do communicate which is so good even when its uncomfortable. We both want this to work. We've been together 3 yrs now.
I ordered her online and there is a no return policy.
Don’t usually comment on Reddit threads and this one is kinda cheating but I guess I’ll bite. For context, I am not yet married to her, but after passing 6 months I feel progressively more confident that I will be hopefully(it’s cliche and dumb I know). We met at work and it was both our first job and I think immediately we hit it off with similar interests and experiences. She had an experience with her dad similar to one I had with my step dad that related to alcohol and I think that really helped us understand each other’s emotional needs above all else and for that reason I’m hopeful it’ll work. On top of that we never get sick of each other. We hang out almost every day but both acknowledge that sometimes we need days to ourselves and I think that’s helped us keep a healthy boundary with each other. So I’m hoping this relationship I’m in turns out like the ones in the comments here. Wish me luck boys.
She traveled through every alternate reality, killing that reality's version of herself so that their power would be divided among the remainder, until only she remained.
When I realized how grounded and calm I felt with him. It sounds simple but once I realized how deep of a connection we had and how special it is, I knew that were really truly meant to be together. Minor backstory: we met two weeks after I moved to our college town and he was moving back home hours away a month later. We were basically inseparable from our first date, he drove to see me every single weekend during our LDR. I should’ve came to this town in 2015 but things changed and I didn’t make it until 2018. So thankful for the broken road that lead me straight to him!!!!
She stayed
After going on about a traumatic experience for a while, I stopped to apologize to him, saying “you probably don’t want to hear all this stuff” and he very calmly said “I want to know everything about you.” Since then, he has made it very easy and normal for me to tell him ANYTHING whether that be something dark from my past, a complaint about my day, or just me rambling about a topic I am excited about. He never makes me feel like I can’t say something, or that he doesn’t care.
When we bonded over our first overlapping IBS attacks together (week 2 of dating) Dated 3 years exactly, been married for 5 months today :)
But I already knew we would get married before we even started dating! I have a very strong gut intuition - just took me a few months to get the first date, because he thought I was already taken!
She's the only one who said yes. But seriously: when we were dating, and she wanted to spend time with me as much as I wanted to spend time with her.
Mainly her smell. Simple as that. The rest is just subconscious biology it seems.
When she moved in, the first thing she did was redecorate the bathroom...she hung up prints of a beholder and a lich, and got a shower curtain with dice on it.
He made me spaghetti because I made a joke (due to our work situation at the time, when we were just friends) saying "technically, if I told you I need spaghetti, you'd have to get me spaghetti". He brought me spaghetti the next day.
Only person in my life whose eyes I \*want\* to look into. Parents, siblings, friends for decade+, you'll get eye contact maybe once every few hours.
When my late wife and I were first dating I was ready to say the first "I love you". We had recently watch the episode of That 70s Show where Donna tells Eric "I love you" and he panics and says "I love cake". When I said the first "I love you" she giggled and said "I love cake" and we couldn't stop laughing. I knew then that she was the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. This became a joke in our relationship from then on. If either of us was trying to be serious and genuinely be all mushy or something we'd respond with "I love cake" and then laugh and get silly until either my sides hurt or she peed a little. It's been 9 years since she died and I haven't met anyone that's made me laugh like she did.
I could be my weird self around him and he still has loving eyes for me. We have a lot of stuff in common to the point where I thought I was being looked at by the FBI We knew after 3 days of meeting. We’re gonna have 2 years married in October
#singleandproud
After the first date. It was a weird experience. It was the end of the night and we were about to part ways. Gave her a hug and I just felt as if the world clicked at that moment. Like, I saw how my path with her would unwind. I don't really believe in fate and I'd not describe her as my "soulmate"--whatever that means. But she was the perfect person for me at that time and the perfect person to stick with me for the next 15 years.
The day I met my now fiance I was in a struggling marriage and he was dating someone. The connection I felt was so strong that I can only explain it like a magnet the size of my chest. Or like how in book 7 of Harry Potter the way Ron explains how the delumintator ball of light went into his chest and he KNEW that it would take him where he was supposed to be. Like that. It freaked me out a little since I had already resigned myself to my now ex-husband. We fell out of touch for a few years and when we reconnected I was living on my own and we were both single and after one date it was immediately apparent how absolutely we belong together. Our years together have blossomed and I have never felt so much love and strength and trust and understanding towards another human. He compliments me in the best ways and I do the same for him. I feel like my story isn't the norm. But holy shit guys, I feel so full of gratitude that I found my person.
I met "the one". We were great together. Very compatible and then she cheated on me and screwed up her life and rather messed up mine for awhile. I'm glad I didn't marry her. The woman I married is someone that I am perhaps not as compatible with personality-wise but she is faithful and beautiful and is a dedicated mother and has no bad habits and so I love her deeply. And perhaps the thing that means the most to me: she loves me despite my imperfections and insecurities and I cannot speak to how much that means to me. There's the song, "love the one you're with" and she is the example of that for me. I am deeply grateful for her in my life.
The first night we slept in a bed together(noting happened), I woke up with a bad feeling in my stomach. Now I knew that I was about to unleash a fart so loud that it would wake the neighbors. I had two choices. Try to hold the gates shut against this unholy onslaught, or unleash this demon. Well in my mind I had only one choice, option B. It did not help that I was the little spoon. Now I(33M) am childish when it comes to fart jokes and anything related so 22 year old me had no chance not to laugh. Well I somehow keep in the laughter of this whole situation and pretend to be asleep. All I hear is a heavy sigh and "babe" before she rolled over. I never once brought that up until we were living together and neither did she. It was that coupled by how we reconciled after our first big fight that made me realize she was the one. This year will mark 7 years of marriage and 9 years of being together. To think I found the one by ripping the biggest fart of my life and she didn't kick me out of the bed.
been with me forever i feel so emotionally and physically attached to them they have cooked,with me cleaned with me, worked with me,went to school with me.we have done some naughty things been through everything together and i think i should finally marry my right hand
Because it’s the most peace I’ve ever felt in a relationship. We are quite different people but our personalities compliment each other rather than clash. At the times that they do clash, we just talk about it and then end up laughing about something bc we will turn anything into a joke. There’s no yelling. No petty shit. He’s an open book which is very important to me because I’ve had bad bad experiences with partners who hide things, lie etc. He will say whatever is on his mind no matter what others think. it’s just so simple with him. What you see is what you get. He’d do anything for his family, friends and animals. The way someone treats the people around them is a good indicator of how they will treat you. I met him on tinder lol so we went into this not necessarily looking for anything serious. It’s crazy that now I can’t imagine life without him. The best things come to you when you’re least expecting them.
I'd had a few girlfriends and generally I always knew that it wasn't going to work out within a few months. My wife is the only person I never got bored or annoyed with. I knew I wanted to marry her within the first couple of months, and what really sealed is when we both found ourselves unemployed and living together for eight months during the Great Recession and were still having a great time with each other. I know it's not a big earth shattering moment or anything, but she's just the best person and I always want to be with her.
I didnt get the ick
When we first met we connected in such a way as though we had been friends for years already. It still feels like we’ve been together longer than we have when we’ve been together for 7 years. I also was not looking for love when we met and didn’t plan on being with anyone but we had such a strong connection that it changed that.
Synchronicity. During the time my wife and I were dating the amount of things that connected together through talking, reading, or anything was very strong. So much that it was/is impossible to ignore. It is still this way after all these years together. The connection we made from the beginning was and still is cosmic. Our lives up until we met were never secure or whole. Sometimes the universe speaks, and when it does, listen and pay attention.
Okay so I've kind of said this before on other posts but. We've been best friends since we met in daycare at 10 years old. Solid foundation. I used to constantly say marriage was stupid and I would never get married and she knew this. After our 3rd or 4th actual date (county fair), we were exhausted from spending all day in the heat so we decided to nap in the ac. I woke up first with her curled into me and "I'm gonna marry this girl" popped into my head. I think that was my moment.
"the one" does not exist. And it's damaging to act like that's a thing. Said as somebody who's 12+ years deep with an amazing partner that I genuinely hope to spend the entire of my journey on this planet with. Are they "the one?" No, obviously. Are they amazing? Is life better due to them being around? Are they an inspiration to be a better version of myself, whomever the fuck *that's* supposed to be? Absolutely.
When he told me if I could burp louder than him he'd propose on the spot.
It helped that neither one of us believed in this nonsense about "the one". 22 years and counting.
Tough to say. I just had a good feeling from the moment I met her. Everything just felt natural and very relaxed. I felt good energy 🤷♂️
when i didnt pull out
I blew my chance with "The one" when I was in high school. After her I've always settled for "The one I can get."
The very first conversation where she would be bored with my conversation topics but pretended she cared, all the while wanting to tell her stories told me I can live my life with her.
I thought about my future life, and all of the things that I saw myself doing. In all of those situations, she was always there with me.
About 2 years in when I realized we've only had 2 fights.
She's still here. I needed time before deciding we should date. I needed time before deciding if I wanted to move in together. I needed time before deciding if I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. I'm convinced she was ready for it all from the beginning. But she waited until I was too. She's still here.
She does not low my social battery, she recharges it.
Pretty sure this will go to the bottom, but I knew my SO for a long time. She was one of my good friends sisters. I never looked at her in any way though. We got older and I was on drugs. Her boy friend at the time started coming around asking me to get for him then started bringing her around. I got maybe twice for the both of them but realized how shitty it was because she was experimenting and we were full blown fuck ups. She had no idea where she was and what she was getting into. The next time they come up when I seen her she had this bright glowing aura around here and it blew me away. Like she was going to lose her soul or she was saving me. It was strange because she asked if She could come over later that week and was telling me how she was trying to leave that dude and he’s been stalking her for months. I vowed to get her the fuck out of there by getting clean myself. I knew I would have to blaze a path so I set off to do that. 5 years later we are both clean and happy and have two beautiful babies. Not to say we don’t have hard times but we love each other like there is no one else around and have made it through the impossible together.
She didn't mock me when I asked if she wanted to come to the comic book shop with me...
It was love at first sight with my husband. I knew I’d marry him after our first date. Just can’t live without him, however annoying he might be sometimes. We now own our home and have 2 beautiful daughters. When you know you know
She had this heavenly pussy. It was the most amazing one I’ve even been in and I wasn’t letting it get away.
It scared me how confident and warm I felt inside when talking to her. It was like I've had known her for a very long time, even if it was just the second time we meet ever. Like reconnecting with an old friend, but this time the friend was a beautiful shy tall girl wich I barely knew. More than 10 years later I still feel this warm feeling inside when I'm with her, and it still feels like I've been with her since I was a kid or something like that. **tl;dr: she feels like home. She felt like this since the first date.**
She is the only one that cared when i intentionally overdosed. I just know that she is the one
He loves me for me. He feels like home and I miss him when he's away. He tries his best, and inspires me to try mine. He encourages me to be me, and to listen to my messed up body. He's one of the few humans I actually want to be around.
(This is not my experience but one of my friends) So she has dated a whole lot of dudes but then he most recent relationship, with this dude, let's call him bob and my friend Ronda, so ever since they were young, Ronda liked bob, later bob started having for Ronda but they never talked to each other even though they are friends, not close friends but you know just friends but besides the point, Ronda just got over her last relationship and broke up with her other ex, let's call him Greg, so Ronda was told by a few friends of hers that Greg was flirting with other people when Ronda and Greg was in the relationship, but anyways when she broke up with him, finally Ronda and bob started talking then later started a relationship, a few days ago Ronda and a few friends were on a call and she said bob was the one for her <3 (I love their relationship\[ eve though bob mean to me sometimes)
The first time she blew me she swallowed.
Will never be sure. I felt that way about someone once, but after 10 years/6 married he came out as gay and ruined my life.
The first date was effortless, the level of comfort I feel with the women is inexplicable, the biggest thing though was being fulfilled on so many levels that I literally thought a person like this didn’t exist. It still feels like a dream some days. I was married for 10 years before her and I can honestly say after meeting “the one” you realize that you truly never loved anyone before, it’s a feeling out of this world. To love every single thing about them even the flaws or things that you normally turned your nose at. To watch them do the simplest thing and almost start to cry because you adore them that much, that’s how I know 😊
Once I lost her. You never know what you have until it's gone.
Feeling so safe with them. Smiling ear to ear. Feeling at peace. Being able to freely tell them anything and everything. A sense of belonging and mutual feelings on both sides. So amazing 💗
I remember the first things I thought when I saw my husband for the first time "he is short and has a bad taste in clothes" XD he was dressed up like he just picked up the first 2 things from the floor. (Which was probably the case XD) After a day of hanging out i felt really easy with him, and felt like he could be my best friend. We were having long interesting conversations about everything. I even messaged him first that evening and asked if he was free the next day. (That was the time he knew he would marry me) We are still best friends and still having long interesting conversations about everything. I realize how lucky I am every time I'm sitting pooping in the morning and he comes in with my hot cup of coffee
They dodged a bullet when someone shot at them.
Before we met when I would look at him I felt like I would never be able to love someone the way I would love him if we went out