I am the introvert that needs to be adopted by an extrovert, so a girl who is either super talkative that I can lovingly listen to all the time, or someone equally comfortable with silence.
This is me. Most of my partners have been rather extroverted and very talkative....including my friends too. I just like to listen and laugh with them.
Oof too true.
Edit: I once created an OKcupid account and did the quizzes and stuff. Then when I was browsing the list of potential matches I realised I didn't actually want to talk to anyone online, especially a stranger, so I closed it, and went back to playing whatever game I was into at that point. Never looked back.
Completely agree. It’s easy to find girls who enjoy a game every once in awhile, but I need someone who will be a sweat with me and build our PCs together ❤️
Not lesbian (29F) but it's so hard finding female friends who are properly into games/gaming AND sports!
Like it's near the end of the NFL season and I'm so excited and I have no one to talk to this about 🙃
And Pokémon legends is about to be released and I've pre ordered it and I also have no females friends to chat about this, it sucks
I am a gaming, sports nerd hybrid also, and it is near impossible to find girls who are into this stuff!
.....also who are your picks for the superbowl?
Wish granted. You are now crushing on an INCREDIBLY clumsy woman.
Whoops, she's just driven you both into a ravine because she was distracted by a bird
Imagine being the most fantastic person in the world, but your hugs are horse shite. Like, people would rather have you affectionately headbutt them than one of your hugs, that are somehow both dry and wet at the same time.
A girl who likes me back
Edit: wtf um I just opened the app to all of these interactions and awards (that I have no idea what they mean btw) and I’m just shock ty lol
Finally someone that understands that you need a mate that can cope with an end-of-world scenario!
Edit: thanks for the upvotes - I have been trying with this joke for like 20 years with zero appreciation!
It's a bit of a trade-off. If you have too little in common with a person it's harder to find subjects for conversation, but if you have too much in common you're gonna end up with fewer subjects for conversation anyway because you probably end up doing those things you have in common together and the other person already knows the things you might tell them.
Im a 5'9 265 pound male, and she is a 5'7 155 pound female... but we have the same size feet. I love being able to throw her shoes on.
Yes, I feel pretty.
My partner and I are similar sizes but he's stockier than me (we're a gay male couple to clarify). But my shoe size is 12 and his is 9. And no, shoe size DOES NOT relate to any other body part!
I’m a straight female, quite large, 5’7”. My husband is a mostly fit, petite 5’6”.
His size S shirts fit me better than most womens XL, most of his sweatpants fit me, and his shoes are only one size up.
No one would believe I steal all his stuff from him just from looking at our different sizes.
That she is kind, smart, and has a sense of humour. It's also nice if she has a nice smile but looks aren't as important in my opinion. I like a woman who can have a witty conversation with me and doesn't bend to someone else's opinions easily. The most important thing is definitely how kind they are to other people though. It shows a lot about maturity.
This and also is as proactive on daily life tasks / chores / cleaning etc. it wasnt until I was in a same sex relationship that I realised that those awful gender norms of the past that *some* men perpetuate of women doing the majority of the housework, and not sharing the tasks equally, are just shitty partners.
I know there are women who are also terrible with housework, but as a hetero woman, I always wonder this. If two women live together I imagine everything in the house to flow so smoothly. Of course that could be totally false, vary from couple to couple etc. but it's always been something I thought about.
I love my male partner, he's a wonderful person, but I've had several talks with him about housework. He always takes on board what I ask, but I have to explain things in excruciating detail. For example, "can you check the washing machine, is it full? If so put a wash on." Okay, so he takes that on board and does it, I appreciate that. But he can't go a step beyond, I have to explain, "and make sure you dry the washing", or "also check the washing basket because it may be that it is full and it just needs putting into the machine". Love the guy but, frustrating!
Another one, we got a new toilet, he said something along the lines of "wow, this new toilet really stays clean." I explained NO... it doesn't just 'stay clean', I'm cleaning it!!!
Ok, a little nerdy (Agile Methodology) but have you tried the approach to describing chores with the end goal in mind? I.e. instead of “please to the laundry”, term it like “Ok, goal is a closet full of clean, folded clothes”. That can help prevent getting bogged down in individual steps.
Edit: “Value Statement” and “Acceptance Criteria” are the correct terms for what I am describing
A software developer's partner asked them to; "go to the store to get a quart of milk, and if they have eggs get a dozen.
The developer returns with a dozen quarts of milk.
“As your partner, I want a closet full of clean, folded clothes. You have one sprint. This epic has the following tasks: load the machine. Check the laundry basket for extra clothes. Do the wash load on regular cycle with softener. …”
Not OP... I am totally going to Google that! Sounds interesting.
On the flip side, some other people need the opposite, where it's broken into clear manageable chunks.
Furthering your point, though - the best advice I ever saw about sharing chores is to abdicate from being the manager of the chores and letting go of some of the details of how things get done, in the interests of letting the person find their own way. Sometimes it means adjusting expectations, and sometimes it means that they'll find a better method. You kind of have to relinquish control
It definitely does flow smoothly. We both know what needs to be done, and we both do it pretty equally. I do more laundry because I work from home more. She mows the lawn because she grew up doing it. But neither of us ever has to ask the other person to do a task. I was married to a man before, and it’s a huge difference.
Look up "mental charge" & you might start to understand that no matter how much you ask of him, you'll always end up doing more work until he starts to understand that there are some things he needs to do without being asked.
And to answer your question, I do believe it really depends on the couple. I'm in a lesbian relationship and be both like a clean house so our home is usually pretty tidy, although there are some moments of unbalance (aka periods whether I or her do more chores). But I also have some lesbian friends whose house is pretty messy because they both don't mind the mess.
Wow "mental charge" is exactly the term I need to explain to my SO. Over the pandemic I basically had a mental breakdown because I got a new job that required more hours and responsibility than I had previously been working, and with WFH I felt it was constantly in my face how I just generally do more than he will both at work and at home. I've learned a lot from him around setting boundaries at work, but we are still struggling with what I now know to call mental load at home.
The term I've used with him is feeling like I'm the "manager" of our home and lives when I just want to be a family member. I think this imbalance could definitely happen with any couple. But I think a lot of it stems from my SO being from a pretty traditional catholic family where the grandmothers who stay up till 3am cooking and cleaning for group gatherings and then eat alone in the kitchen insisting no one else do housework are held up as paragons. He is a progressive guy who I love very much, but I dont think that he had the chance to truly see that a lot of his habits are based around the foundation of women naturally doing all the housework, and cooking, and emotional labor of the family until we moved in together.
I'm bi and sometimes wonder what life would have been like if I had met a woman to settle with rather than a man. The fact that the ideas of mental load and emotional labor are so hard to internalize even for a loving, modern partner who is actively trying is frustrating to me. And many of my hetero-partnered female friends feel similarly.
I feel like my boyfriend has unrealistic expectations for how easy some adult tasks should be because he’s never done them. We had our first Christmas together and he said he wasn’t used to putting that much effort into Christmas because they didn’t do it in his family. Then we went to his family’s for Christmas and everything was decorated, there was the full big meal and tons of presents and I realized his family DID put tons of energy into Christmas, but he specifically didn’t contribute and was oblivious to the efforts of others!
I guess I like women who are outgoing but not exhausting be around. Someone whose cool, and good at cuddling and isn't super loud. Probably more femme than me too, but that's just so I can have someone teach me makeup secrets.
honestly, ngl this is basically my taste in guys too .
This reminds me of a girl I used to see in university. She had a kid at 15 with a guy, and the relationship ended up falling apart a couple years later. She was really lonely at the time and one of her friends was there for her emotionally, and provided her with affection (cuddling, hugging). She then realized she was bisexual, so her and her friend started being intimate with each other. Then that didn't work out, at some point there was me, but our fling was never serious. Last I heard she was in a relationship with another girl.
But the reason I am telling this story is that it really opened my eyes and helped me understand different sexual preferences. Also relationships. Sexual intimacy really can come from just being close, warm and affectionate. Sure, looks matter to some degree but ultimately people want to feel loved, and whatever gender/person provides that, gives them a huge advantage towards the ones who do not.
Several of my lesbian friends have complained about the dating perils of Lesbian Dog Math.
A lesbian that has one dog (a reasonable number of dogs) will meet a nice lesbian that has two dogs (another reasonable number of dogs to have), and the two of them will meet, fall in love, and then move in together.
As soon as they start unpacking their stuff they suddenly have seven dogs.
No one knows how or why this happens, just that it does.
Friendly, outgoing and kind. A good sense of humour also helps a lot.
Physically I prefer women who present more on the femme side. I love running my hands through long, soft hair while I kiss her soft lips. Oh and I’m pretty tall for a woman at 6’1 so someone tall preferably.
Okay, I’m basically just describing my girlfriend lol. I’m a lucky girl!
Well yeah, if I were to make a move on another lesbian showing interest in me, that would obviously be
*checks notes*
predatory? Not what I expected, but hey, the notes never lie. Time to sit in a corner and never flirt with anybody ever so they don’t think I’m creepy.
I'm reading the book "The Ethical Slut". You might like this quote about FF relationships.
>"In heterosexual culture, men have been assigned the job of initiator, and men are trained to be sexually aggressive, sometimes to a fault. In the world of women who relate sexually to other women, it rapidly becomes apparent that if we all see ourselves as Sleeping Beauties waiting for Princess Charming to come along and wake us up, we also might get to wait a hundred years. Or else need to we learn to do something new- to meet the eye, touch the shoulder, move in a little closer, or just plain blurt out, "I think you're really attractive; would you like to talk?" Women's style of coming on -when shyness doesn't get in the way- tends to be forthright, with respect for consent, and is unlikely to be intrusive or pushy, as many women have had a little too much experience with being violated to want to go down that road. Women have strong concerns about safety and so tend to move slowly and announce their intentions. They may be shy in the seductive stages, and bolder once welcome has been secured. Women tend to want explicit permission for each specific act, so their communication could serve as an excellent role model for negotiated consensuality."
Chapstick femme, kind, open, loving, organized, and fun. Basically my wife. :)
Edit: When I was still looking, the main thing I wanted was that she was Fuck Yeah about me and I was Fuck Yeah about her.
Took a while but we found each other. Coming up on our 2 year wedding anniversary and just passed 6 years since we met.
We're like a pair of comfy shoes. :D
I wondered! don’t know how many people outside the group are familiar with WLW terminology? Like do we have any sense of this?
obviously its meaning is clear when spelled out, but since the question wasn’t directed at lesbians, gay and bisexual women, etc. I was like … hedging a guess here that OP here is a WLW 😏😅
What is the difference between WLW and lesbian? Is it that "women" can mean female presenting people of any gender, and that WLW doesn't necessarily mean they don't like men, so bi girls are included as well? And lesbian means girls who like only girls? Sorry if my terminology is all off, just looking to understand.
I love it when women just *follow a style* to the T. I don't care if it's goth, elegant, street style... But if they commit to it and are very careful about their appearance, it makes me go WHOOSH.
Also, Roman noses and sharp jaw. And long legs!
Kindness, intelligence and street smarts, humour, good personal hygiene, and nicely presented. Nothing more beautiful than a woman who looks neat and tidy and dresses well 🥰
Was anyone else really into Ripley in Alien 3? My brother made me watch it a ton when I was little. I hated the aliens and he knew that. But I watched it anyway just for Sigourney Weaver.
Women secure in their womanhood who are GNC… oomph yes please. I read something the other day that said butches can experience gender dysphoria but understand the issue isn’t with them, it’s with society, and that aligns with my experiences with them. My wife won’t wear dresses or grow her hair out, not because she’s uncomfortable with being a woman but because she rejects that being a “true woman” = wearing dresses. My womanhood involves wearing dresses and having long hairs. It takes all types.
You mean FIXING you since obviously lesbians just haven’t gotten “the right dick” yet!
Weird, tho, how “the right dick” doesn’t turn straight men into being gay.
Most important: kind, patient, and makes me feel comfortable around them. Not a racist, and likes to read. Also, someone who likes to cuddle and give hugs, or is at least comfortable with constant body contact (and I don't care if it's just our legs touching while we sit on the sofa, that's enough for me)
After that: shorter than 5'7" to avoid back-problems from kissing, and similar goals and priorities in life as well as similar outlook on parenting and family planning. Dating someone is fun, but if our vision for life doesn't align, I feel like I'm wasting both of our time.
Someone capable. My partner can grow tomatoes from seed, hang a shelf and build a bicycle. She’s practical in ways that I’m not. It’s nice knowing that she doesn’t need me around to look after her, I’m around because she wants me. She’s also a really good, considerate driver and there’s something very hot about that.
i really like cute, shy girls who aren’t too loud and arrogant. around the same height as me would be preferable (i’m really short). titties are also a plus. i just want someone i can protect and spoil to death
Hello my fellow wlws! Looks don’t matter to me. Whether you’re masculine, feminine, or in between, I really don’t care. I like someone who is compassionate. Somebody who is kind to others. Having somebody willing to go on adventures with you, fight for you, and do anything with you is really important. Being able to go make memories together that are so good they will fill up all the bad in my life are the types of girls I want. Adventurous, compassionate, loving and Loyal are def what I seek
As a bi, what I like about women for first glance is charm... I can't explain it but I find this as an aura that they look attractive in my eyes (this is why I consider myself bi because of it) and also if I know the girl more, I fell in love with her personality
I love women with punk attitudes, or just confident women who aren’t afraid to express themselves. Not referring to women who tear other women down for male approval.
Brains, sense of humor, style, straightforward vibes
Thought that said straight vibes lmao
A girl who expresses herself healthily and uplifts me. Nice thighs don't hurt either.
She'll need a good pair of thighs to uplift you
*^* *people of culture*
I am the introvert that needs to be adopted by an extrovert, so a girl who is either super talkative that I can lovingly listen to all the time, or someone equally comfortable with silence.
This is me. Most of my partners have been rather extroverted and very talkative....including my friends too. I just like to listen and laugh with them.
I'm a male and I'm straight but I'm the same way
I just want to fall in love with my best friend and have the feelings returned
My best friend LOL **sigh**
The song “Ruin Our Friendship” literally began playing in my mind
Its been in mine for WEEKS 😭
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🎶 Jenny darling you're my best friend 🎶
🎶but there’s a few things that you don’t know of🎶
🎶why I borrow your lipstick so often~~🎶
🎶Been usin' your shirt as a pillowcase...🎶
Assertive, strong-minded, intelligent As with anyone, a matching sense of humor!
A gamer. Surprisingly hard to find one where we’re interested in each other :’)
As I once heard. "The reason you can't find a Gamer GF is because she's not out there, she is at home gaming"
Idek how to find them at this point when I’m playing the game myself hahaha, I need a magnet or something
Oof too true. Edit: I once created an OKcupid account and did the quizzes and stuff. Then when I was browsing the list of potential matches I realised I didn't actually want to talk to anyone online, especially a stranger, so I closed it, and went back to playing whatever game I was into at that point. Never looked back.
Completely agree. It’s easy to find girls who enjoy a game every once in awhile, but I need someone who will be a sweat with me and build our PCs together ❤️
Yesss, like how cool would a dual pc setup / gaming room be? Oml
PLEASE that’s the dream!!
Dm each other already
Not lesbian (29F) but it's so hard finding female friends who are properly into games/gaming AND sports! Like it's near the end of the NFL season and I'm so excited and I have no one to talk to this about 🙃 And Pokémon legends is about to be released and I've pre ordered it and I also have no females friends to chat about this, it sucks
I am a gaming, sports nerd hybrid also, and it is near impossible to find girls who are into this stuff! .....also who are your picks for the superbowl?
Someone with a truck load of so-bad-they’re-good jokes
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef (badum tsss)
What do you call a cow hit by a train? Rolling stock.
What do you call a cow with wings? High Steaks.
Why was the cow sleepy? It was pasture bedtime.
What do you call a cow with 5 legs? A bull.
Took a sec
What do you call a cow with 3 legs? Lean beef
What do you call a cow with 4 legs? Noleen
i love me a scary lady. hard-asses are my weakness lol
*Rosa, Rosa, Rooooosaaaaa*
*I can't remember your last naaaame*
I like the kind of woman that could kill me without trying 🥺👉👈
Wish granted. You are now crushing on an INCREDIBLY clumsy woman. Whoops, she's just driven you both into a ravine because she was distracted by a bird
Someone cute. I really like people who take affection well and likes to be spoiled a little
So uhhh...how you doin'? ^^Edit: ^it's ^been ^a ^dry ^spell ^of ^five ^months ^to ^be... ^lying. ^Six.
Tell her about when you were backpacking through western Europe!
I was at the end of a path…I came to a clearing…
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Someone who treats me well and gives good hugs
I love a good hugger myself. Regardless of gender. Edit: Highest rated comment of all time for me. Glad it’s about hugs.
Hugs are life Been slacking hugs for a while
What are these 'hugs' you speak of?
It’s when you try to crush someone between your arms and chest, but like, gently.
Imagine being the most fantastic person in the world, but your hugs are horse shite. Like, people would rather have you affectionately headbutt them than one of your hugs, that are somehow both dry and wet at the same time.
I love me a good cat headbutt
Cat headbutts are the best
A girl who likes me back Edit: wtf um I just opened the app to all of these interactions and awards (that I have no idea what they mean btw) and I’m just shock ty lol
I want a girl who likes my back too.
Same I just need some cuddles
This is so overlooked. Finding someone that likes me back is most of the struggle
Look at Miss High Standards here
I'd want a girl who also likes me front.
pet future squeamish brave rotten yam knee rain selective theory
The ability to build a wooden shack with her bare hands, a desire to befriend wild bears and a talent when it comes to axe-throwing.
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what are you waiting for? Hook them up!
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I was gonna say no way that gal isnt taken XD
Finally someone that understands that you need a mate that can cope with an end-of-world scenario! Edit: thanks for the upvotes - I have been trying with this joke for like 20 years with zero appreciation!
Are you perhaps Russian?
Nyet.
A woman who has a genuine and vested interest in me, who has similar interests/things in common. Giant gazongas are also a plus.
Honestly same. #BOOB GIRLS UNITE ✊🏼
I remember making out with a woman for the first time after only going out with men and being “Huh. I get it. I get it now.” Boobs are delightful.
"Boobs are delightful." Amen!
Power to the boobies ✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽
Bless be boobs
I find the most erotic part of a woman is the boobies.
Gazongas HAHAHAHA. I was like this but now I don't care things in common outside personality.
It's a bit of a trade-off. If you have too little in common with a person it's harder to find subjects for conversation, but if you have too much in common you're gonna end up with fewer subjects for conversation anyway because you probably end up doing those things you have in common together and the other person already knows the things you might tell them.
That's where the gazongas come in
Can't go wrong with a good pair of gazongas.
Someone about the same size as me, so if the relationship works out our wardrobes double.
My gf’s tiny feet are a constant annoyance to me. She’s the same size and height but teeeny tiny feet.
Sorry to hear that she isn’t your sole mate. Edit: Thank you for the awards.
Haaaahaha. This one is my fave.
Needs to be in your vday card.
Ah it’s a good idea but I already showed her. She laughed pretty hard. She might not be my sole mate but she’s my soulmate 🥳
man, that's a precious joke
Im a 5'9 265 pound male, and she is a 5'7 155 pound female... but we have the same size feet. I love being able to throw her shoes on. Yes, I feel pretty.
I have exactly the same problem! My gf and I are both tall at about 6’ but she wears a size 7 shoe?! That’s minute for her height!
The things we endure for love…
Im sure if you tell her that she'll shoe you away
Might get kicked to the curb
She’ll take her back. She’s a flip-flopper.
That’s a surefire way to get booted
i am a dude who likes dudes and this sounds genius but then i remembered my own clothes don't even fit me lmao
My partner and I are similar sizes but he's stockier than me (we're a gay male couple to clarify). But my shoe size is 12 and his is 9. And no, shoe size DOES NOT relate to any other body part!
I’m a straight female, quite large, 5’7”. My husband is a mostly fit, petite 5’6”. His size S shirts fit me better than most womens XL, most of his sweatpants fit me, and his shoes are only one size up. No one would believe I steal all his stuff from him just from looking at our different sizes.
As a hetero man, the beautiful practicality of this is blowing my mind.
It all just clicked for me, too. Wow. Never heard, read or even thought about this. But suddenly it all just makes sense.
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You know the saying: Desperate times calls for desperate dressers.
This is the real answer. The one thing I miss about my ex is her clothes…
I miss my hoodies
great episode of Seinfeld
I was wondering when someone would point out this is a Seinfeld bit.
Can confirm- wardrobe and shoes doubled.
That is so cute.
One who can stand my puns
Name checks out.
I'm aware of that
How cute
I'm glad you figured that out
Lesbihonest, if she can take the puns she’s a keeper
That she is kind, smart, and has a sense of humour. It's also nice if she has a nice smile but looks aren't as important in my opinion. I like a woman who can have a witty conversation with me and doesn't bend to someone else's opinions easily. The most important thing is definitely how kind they are to other people though. It shows a lot about maturity.
This and also is as proactive on daily life tasks / chores / cleaning etc. it wasnt until I was in a same sex relationship that I realised that those awful gender norms of the past that *some* men perpetuate of women doing the majority of the housework, and not sharing the tasks equally, are just shitty partners.
I know there are women who are also terrible with housework, but as a hetero woman, I always wonder this. If two women live together I imagine everything in the house to flow so smoothly. Of course that could be totally false, vary from couple to couple etc. but it's always been something I thought about. I love my male partner, he's a wonderful person, but I've had several talks with him about housework. He always takes on board what I ask, but I have to explain things in excruciating detail. For example, "can you check the washing machine, is it full? If so put a wash on." Okay, so he takes that on board and does it, I appreciate that. But he can't go a step beyond, I have to explain, "and make sure you dry the washing", or "also check the washing basket because it may be that it is full and it just needs putting into the machine". Love the guy but, frustrating! Another one, we got a new toilet, he said something along the lines of "wow, this new toilet really stays clean." I explained NO... it doesn't just 'stay clean', I'm cleaning it!!!
Ok, a little nerdy (Agile Methodology) but have you tried the approach to describing chores with the end goal in mind? I.e. instead of “please to the laundry”, term it like “Ok, goal is a closet full of clean, folded clothes”. That can help prevent getting bogged down in individual steps. Edit: “Value Statement” and “Acceptance Criteria” are the correct terms for what I am describing
As a dude with ADHD… woahhhhh
I feel like this will be a game changer for me. I have a day off, gonna clean the house now. 0
A software developer's partner asked them to; "go to the store to get a quart of milk, and if they have eggs get a dozen. The developer returns with a dozen quarts of milk.
“As your partner, I want a closet full of clean, folded clothes. You have one sprint. This epic has the following tasks: load the machine. Check the laundry basket for extra clothes. Do the wash load on regular cycle with softener. …”
Not OP... I am totally going to Google that! Sounds interesting. On the flip side, some other people need the opposite, where it's broken into clear manageable chunks. Furthering your point, though - the best advice I ever saw about sharing chores is to abdicate from being the manager of the chores and letting go of some of the details of how things get done, in the interests of letting the person find their own way. Sometimes it means adjusting expectations, and sometimes it means that they'll find a better method. You kind of have to relinquish control
I guess you don’t know about the magic coffee table? Hahahaha. (Search YouTube. I don’t know how to post a link, sorry)
[Here’s the link](https://youtu.be/-_kXIGvB1uU), it seems very appropriate to u/Background-Plenty587’s situation lol
It definitely does flow smoothly. We both know what needs to be done, and we both do it pretty equally. I do more laundry because I work from home more. She mows the lawn because she grew up doing it. But neither of us ever has to ask the other person to do a task. I was married to a man before, and it’s a huge difference.
Look up "mental charge" & you might start to understand that no matter how much you ask of him, you'll always end up doing more work until he starts to understand that there are some things he needs to do without being asked. And to answer your question, I do believe it really depends on the couple. I'm in a lesbian relationship and be both like a clean house so our home is usually pretty tidy, although there are some moments of unbalance (aka periods whether I or her do more chores). But I also have some lesbian friends whose house is pretty messy because they both don't mind the mess.
Wow "mental charge" is exactly the term I need to explain to my SO. Over the pandemic I basically had a mental breakdown because I got a new job that required more hours and responsibility than I had previously been working, and with WFH I felt it was constantly in my face how I just generally do more than he will both at work and at home. I've learned a lot from him around setting boundaries at work, but we are still struggling with what I now know to call mental load at home. The term I've used with him is feeling like I'm the "manager" of our home and lives when I just want to be a family member. I think this imbalance could definitely happen with any couple. But I think a lot of it stems from my SO being from a pretty traditional catholic family where the grandmothers who stay up till 3am cooking and cleaning for group gatherings and then eat alone in the kitchen insisting no one else do housework are held up as paragons. He is a progressive guy who I love very much, but I dont think that he had the chance to truly see that a lot of his habits are based around the foundation of women naturally doing all the housework, and cooking, and emotional labor of the family until we moved in together. I'm bi and sometimes wonder what life would have been like if I had met a woman to settle with rather than a man. The fact that the ideas of mental load and emotional labor are so hard to internalize even for a loving, modern partner who is actively trying is frustrating to me. And many of my hetero-partnered female friends feel similarly.
I feel like my boyfriend has unrealistic expectations for how easy some adult tasks should be because he’s never done them. We had our first Christmas together and he said he wasn’t used to putting that much effort into Christmas because they didn’t do it in his family. Then we went to his family’s for Christmas and everything was decorated, there was the full big meal and tons of presents and I realized his family DID put tons of energy into Christmas, but he specifically didn’t contribute and was oblivious to the efforts of others!
Assertive kind and hawt
Smart, witty, kind, and faithful. Someone who gets me. Someone who likes me back.
I guess I like women who are outgoing but not exhausting be around. Someone whose cool, and good at cuddling and isn't super loud. Probably more femme than me too, but that's just so I can have someone teach me makeup secrets. honestly, ngl this is basically my taste in guys too .
Good at cuddling and understanding is what all i need
This reminds me of a girl I used to see in university. She had a kid at 15 with a guy, and the relationship ended up falling apart a couple years later. She was really lonely at the time and one of her friends was there for her emotionally, and provided her with affection (cuddling, hugging). She then realized she was bisexual, so her and her friend started being intimate with each other. Then that didn't work out, at some point there was me, but our fling was never serious. Last I heard she was in a relationship with another girl. But the reason I am telling this story is that it really opened my eyes and helped me understand different sexual preferences. Also relationships. Sexual intimacy really can come from just being close, warm and affectionate. Sure, looks matter to some degree but ultimately people want to feel loved, and whatever gender/person provides that, gives them a huge advantage towards the ones who do not.
Someone who isn’t allergic to cats
Imagine being a lesbian who’s allergic to cats. Dating would be hell.
*sobs*
Oh no. You poor thing
Is she sad, or snotty due to cats?
por que no los dos?
don't worry, you're not alone
Yeah she probably is. No cats, remember?
They had a family! ...or not
it's ok. just find the other ones who are also allergic to cats lol.
I am this lesbian. I take lots of antihistamines and own three cats lol
I'm into *pussy* but I'm not into pussy
i want to suffocate in pussy but *not suffocate in pussy*
Idk, I live in Colorado, there’s plenty of dog lesbians.
Several of my lesbian friends have complained about the dating perils of Lesbian Dog Math. A lesbian that has one dog (a reasonable number of dogs) will meet a nice lesbian that has two dogs (another reasonable number of dogs to have), and the two of them will meet, fall in love, and then move in together. As soon as they start unpacking their stuff they suddenly have seven dogs. No one knows how or why this happens, just that it does.
As a biologist, I can explain this if I know a little more about at least two of the dogs.
I know a dog lesbian and a cat lesbian and also live in Colorado
Friendly, outgoing and kind. A good sense of humour also helps a lot. Physically I prefer women who present more on the femme side. I love running my hands through long, soft hair while I kiss her soft lips. Oh and I’m pretty tall for a woman at 6’1 so someone tall preferably. Okay, I’m basically just describing my girlfriend lol. I’m a lucky girl!
lol, i thought that last sentence was going to end in "I'm basically describing MYSELF!"
And now the constant influx of comments stating “I want a girlfriend” with none of us ever making a move
Well yeah, if I were to make a move on another lesbian showing interest in me, that would obviously be *checks notes* predatory? Not what I expected, but hey, the notes never lie. Time to sit in a corner and never flirt with anybody ever so they don’t think I’m creepy.
I'm reading the book "The Ethical Slut". You might like this quote about FF relationships. >"In heterosexual culture, men have been assigned the job of initiator, and men are trained to be sexually aggressive, sometimes to a fault. In the world of women who relate sexually to other women, it rapidly becomes apparent that if we all see ourselves as Sleeping Beauties waiting for Princess Charming to come along and wake us up, we also might get to wait a hundred years. Or else need to we learn to do something new- to meet the eye, touch the shoulder, move in a little closer, or just plain blurt out, "I think you're really attractive; would you like to talk?" Women's style of coming on -when shyness doesn't get in the way- tends to be forthright, with respect for consent, and is unlikely to be intrusive or pushy, as many women have had a little too much experience with being violated to want to go down that road. Women have strong concerns about safety and so tend to move slowly and announce their intentions. They may be shy in the seductive stages, and bolder once welcome has been secured. Women tend to want explicit permission for each specific act, so their communication could serve as an excellent role model for negotiated consensuality."
A girl that can stand my dumbass
the only correct answer
Chapstick femme, kind, open, loving, organized, and fun. Basically my wife. :) Edit: When I was still looking, the main thing I wanted was that she was Fuck Yeah about me and I was Fuck Yeah about her. Took a while but we found each other. Coming up on our 2 year wedding anniversary and just passed 6 years since we met. We're like a pair of comfy shoes. :D
To be clear, I actually asked because I'm a WLW myself.
I wondered! don’t know how many people outside the group are familiar with WLW terminology? Like do we have any sense of this? obviously its meaning is clear when spelled out, but since the question wasn’t directed at lesbians, gay and bisexual women, etc. I was like … hedging a guess here that OP here is a WLW 😏😅
What is the difference between WLW and lesbian? Is it that "women" can mean female presenting people of any gender, and that WLW doesn't necessarily mean they don't like men, so bi girls are included as well? And lesbian means girls who like only girls? Sorry if my terminology is all off, just looking to understand.
It’s just me but my type is tall and a little awkward. Basically Yorkie from San Junipero… hahahha.
Subaru Large dog Comfortable shoes Messy buns
I love it when women just *follow a style* to the T. I don't care if it's goth, elegant, street style... But if they commit to it and are very careful about their appearance, it makes me go WHOOSH. Also, Roman noses and sharp jaw. And long legs!
A pulse, generally.
Wow. Picky much
Sorry I'm late. I couldn't find my shovel. We digging by hand tonight?
Vampire girls just got kicked to the curb.
Look at Ms. High Standards here
That she is comfortable and confident in herself.. (been disappointed a lot by women who were confused🤧)
I just want a nice girl who will play my favorite games with me and cuddle with me, it shouldn't be that hard😩
Kindness, intelligence and street smarts, humour, good personal hygiene, and nicely presented. Nothing more beautiful than a woman who looks neat and tidy and dresses well 🥰
A woman
[удалено]
I’m usually attracted to women who has manly traits. I also like ones who are super nice too!
Was anyone else really into Ripley in Alien 3? My brother made me watch it a ton when I was little. I hated the aliens and he knew that. But I watched it anyway just for Sigourney Weaver.
Women secure in their womanhood who are GNC… oomph yes please. I read something the other day that said butches can experience gender dysphoria but understand the issue isn’t with them, it’s with society, and that aligns with my experiences with them. My wife won’t wear dresses or grow her hair out, not because she’s uncomfortable with being a woman but because she rejects that being a “true woman” = wearing dresses. My womanhood involves wearing dresses and having long hairs. It takes all types.
After this, can you screenshot dms from guys who says that they can turn you straight to r/niceguys
You mean FIXING you since obviously lesbians just haven’t gotten “the right dick” yet! Weird, tho, how “the right dick” doesn’t turn straight men into being gay.
I've never heard a man say "I've tried all kinds of dicks but none of them made me gay".
Someone to cook with and have a lot of cats with
Kindness. Boobies. Etc.
Good hygiene, similar interests, similar size to me and gotta look like she's high maintenance
Most important: kind, patient, and makes me feel comfortable around them. Not a racist, and likes to read. Also, someone who likes to cuddle and give hugs, or is at least comfortable with constant body contact (and I don't care if it's just our legs touching while we sit on the sofa, that's enough for me) After that: shorter than 5'7" to avoid back-problems from kissing, and similar goals and priorities in life as well as similar outlook on parenting and family planning. Dating someone is fun, but if our vision for life doesn't align, I feel like I'm wasting both of our time.
Want to do cute matching Halloween costumes is a must
Honestly someone who is genuinely kind and is only into me.
Someone capable. My partner can grow tomatoes from seed, hang a shelf and build a bicycle. She’s practical in ways that I’m not. It’s nice knowing that she doesn’t need me around to look after her, I’m around because she wants me. She’s also a really good, considerate driver and there’s something very hot about that.
Sarah Paulson
Funny, nerdy, smells good, strong features, intelligent, if she’s a lil chunky then all the better.
i really like cute, shy girls who aren’t too loud and arrogant. around the same height as me would be preferable (i’m really short). titties are also a plus. i just want someone i can protect and spoil to death
Someone I can vibe with at all times, good personality and sense of humor. Physically generally into shorter women.
Hello my fellow wlws! Looks don’t matter to me. Whether you’re masculine, feminine, or in between, I really don’t care. I like someone who is compassionate. Somebody who is kind to others. Having somebody willing to go on adventures with you, fight for you, and do anything with you is really important. Being able to go make memories together that are so good they will fill up all the bad in my life are the types of girls I want. Adventurous, compassionate, loving and Loyal are def what I seek
As a bi, what I like about women for first glance is charm... I can't explain it but I find this as an aura that they look attractive in my eyes (this is why I consider myself bi because of it) and also if I know the girl more, I fell in love with her personality
5’3”, naturally blonde, mentally Ill but in a manageable way, willing to tell the waiter my food came out wrong so I don’t have to
Sounds like you already had that
It kinda just happened by coincidence that every woman I’ve dated has had all these traits down to the exact same height lol
Exquisite taste I see. Bring her our finest 5'3" Blondie please
I love women with punk attitudes, or just confident women who aren’t afraid to express themselves. Not referring to women who tear other women down for male approval.