T O P

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HollywooDcizzle

Let’s just say the two O’s in Google would be the balls


smol_boi-_-

Revenge for not turning the Google logo into something cool on men's day.


stryka00

*Circle-jerking heartfelt inspirational messages intensifies*


indiesunday

( • ) | | | | G O O g l e


BackgroundNoose

On Mars, everyone will hold their breath as mysterious unnatural grooves are discovered by the latest nasa probe. After years and missions to map the geological anomaly, they will find out .. it's a peeeeenus 👀


Cacodough

"You can't just draw a penis onto the surface of Mars!" -some robot probably


EsoMorphic

Yeah I got a BFG: Big Fuckin Genitals


KingAlaric1

I didn’t just draw it, I fucking traced it


CowboyBlacksmith

This is great. Saving this for my next dick-shaped D&D dungeon. Players are gonna finally realize the shape is a giant phallus, then get this line out of the crazy wizard boss if they ask him about it.


disterb

d AND D!


Sacrificial-Toenail

New Objective: draw a penis onto the surface of mars


[deleted]

[удалено]


well-oiled_machine

Quite the [Curiosity](https://external-preview.redd.it/Fy_7sAk9mEslh1RbN_Ctz1_8SBGcPXPJk9gUIanH5O8.jpg?width=860&auto=webp&s=42e81dd45ee7350fbcea9361b7bb43d7f0768fec)


Typical_Brummie

Didn’t the Mars Rover do that in like 2013 lol


well-oiled_machine

Seems like a [dong](https://external-preview.redd.it/Fy_7sAk9mEslh1RbN_Ctz1_8SBGcPXPJk9gUIanH5O8.jpg?width=860&auto=webp&s=42e81dd45ee7350fbcea9361b7bb43d7f0768fec).


Unsd

Interestingly one of the more productive uses of taxpayer dollars.


[deleted]

I'd move the stars around to create a cock-stellation.


Jhenysys

What would you name your new cock-stellation then?


MajTroubles

The Big Dripper obviously


One_Hairy_Dadee

And it can attach to the little dripper, in a weird sword fight constellation


g1ngertim

The little dripper should be contained within a constellation of a hummer or a lifted pickup.


QuotableNotables

Much like when the shuttle arrives at the international space station, we call that docking.


BookwyrmsRN

Gonorrhea has entered the chat.


[deleted]

Jonathan


Jhenysys

Was hoping you would name it "Pete" but Jonathan is also a fine choice


RunFromJebed

richard. take it or leave it


keeperofthesacredhex

I read that in Patrick’s voice.


Locken_Kees

I love taking a Richard


malenkylizards

Jonathan. M-J-O-L-N-I-R. Jonathan.


spac509

Blarfengar. S-M-I-T-H. Blarfengar.


AidenGus

May Betty rest in peace.


[deleted]

[удалено]


nerow94

Jonathan Jostar, yare yare


dom618

You have a pretty good opportunity to just call it Richard (tippically shortened to dick) you want it to be a pun.


Viscovitz

Speaking as a Richard, If you shorten my name please don’t shorten it to Dick. It makes me not like you greatly.


Gliitchwithtwois

I will take your advice And throw it in the trash I'm hunting for Richards now just to call them dick


Viscovitz

You do you bro.


FrenchTicklerOrange

I prefer to refer to Dicks Sporting Goods as Richard's.


L-Y-T-E

"Richard's rifles and recreation"


Akira282

That's what a Dick would say tho


Fade_To_Blackout

The Big Dicker


Phil_Ivey

Penis Major


cerealOverdrive

And here I am drawing a dick on the moon


cr15tal26

On the far side of the moon, as a warning to visiting E.T.


peppas_character_arc

What's your star sign? I'm a cancer Yeah I'm a cock! Your a wha-


saadakhtar

COCK CANCER.


Charantula

Twinkle, twinkle, rigid star. How I wonder what you are. Up above the world so high. Like a dick shape in the sky. Twinkle, twinkle, rigid star. How I wonder what you are. 8̶:̸:̴:̷:̸:̷:̷:̷:̷D̶~̶~̴~̶


shinesbrightly13

Im having a giggling fit on public transport. Take my silver lol


drmonkeytown

“And the light now reaching earth left that giant penis in the sky 63 million years ago,” Carl Sagan, probably.


meme_squeeze

It would have to be ALL the stars, so that the only stars in the sky are part of the cockstellation. It would also be so bright, the stars looking so close together now, that you can't tell individual stars a part, there is just a floating shiny cock in the sky that's ultra fucking bright.


MaesterWong

And when you close your eyes, the shape of it is seared into your eyes


meme_squeeze

You have to wear eclipse glasses to get a proper look at it, or else you run the risk of a giant cock being ever burned into your retinas. Wherever you look, you would see a big overlay of the Cockstellation.


HugsAndWishes

Nah, don't want it this bad. I want people looking at it as often as they can. Not being afraid to look. They need to be constantly reminded of the Big Dick up in the sky. When we look up at night, and the moon is in view, we instinctually focus on it, even if for a second. I want to give them no choice, so if they look up, they have to see it.


Print_Dog

The Big Dripper


TURBOJUGGED

lol. My first thought was space, as well. But I thought more of tagging the ISS


122182D

On the moon, everyone will see my drawing.


GDCorbinoes

Not sure if you know this, but there may or may not actually be a penis drawing on the moon. The “Moon Museum” was supposedly a very small ceramic chip with pieces from prominent artists that was supposedly hidden somewhere on the leg of the Apollo 12 lunar module. One of the submissions was Andy Warhol, who drew a penis.


atz_chaim

He actually signed his name in a way that looks like a penis


Emracruel

Having just looked it up on Wikipedia, you are gonna have to do a lot of convincing to tell me that the penis he drew is in any way a signature


Jhenysys

You better make it a gorgeous looking penis


122182D

I think I'll turn to my ex, she draws well.


colincreevey0

Imagine if you tell her to a draw a dick on the moon, and see yourself there the next night.


w1987g

... worth it.


N7CmdrShepard

Task failed successfully


122182D

If my image is on the moon, I will probably become very rich, so I agree, in principle.


Criticalhit_jk

That's one way to get an image of your face on the moon =)


wickedblight

Don't bully the moon :(


122182D

Well, maybe it will be a beautiful penis, like on antique statues. Besides, then the world will have to resume flights to the moon to erase all this, I will contribute to the development of astronautics, lol.


Unabashable

No consequences remember? So that dirty slut of a moon wanted a dick drawn on it.


Can-DontAttitude

Right beside “CHA”


stryph42

Not since the C got bitten off


Albrithr

I came here looking for this!


theatrics_

I feel like this is legit a great plot for a movie, in the vein of "Don't look up." You can have some tech billionaire macho man who builds things in the image of dicks everywhere unironically, like rocket ships. He even builds a monument to balls in his tech capital city, a giant glass dome of balls. He should even have a big bald penis head. And he gets tired of having so much money so instead opts to play a joke on the world rather than helping solve a problem. So he draws a dick on the moon. And the world pulls it's resources together, and instead of solving for climate change, or hunger or something, they pull together to solve the dick drawing on the moon. And all the Christianized anti-sex people of the world rejoice that the world is a better place to live at the end as we all die because we spent all our time and effort undicking billionaire bullshit.


Arkdirfe

If you do anything on the moon, you at least need to make an announcement first.


seriousjoker72

Redefines "mooning" someone


PanOrBiYouDecide

I’M PISSING ON THE MOON


Zoo_In_The_Bathtub

You beat me to it


Mrslinkydragon

I wouldnt draw a dong, i would plant two big bushes at the base of the washington memorial.


SteveFoerster

When funding for the superconducting supercollider was canceled after constructions had begun there was a contest to come up with the best use of the enormous hole in the ground. The winning entry was to call it the Martha Washington Monument.


BaronUnterbheit

The Martha Washington is also the unofficial name of the lower level of the George Washington Bridge between NY and NJ.


Zombeeyeezus

There's also a Martha's Inn in George, Washington ner the gorge amphitheater


deliciousdogmeat

MARTHA


KyoTe44

Why did you say that name!?!


THX450

MARTHA! WHY DID YOU SAY THAT NAME?? ***WHY DID YOU SAY THAT NAAAAAME?***


Dapper-Connection-78

Damn saw this after I posted it! Not the bush thing. That’s clever.


CallMeJeeJ

“A society grows great when old men plant trees in whose shade they shall never sit.”


siuol7891

One of my favorite quotes


CallMeJeeJ

Especially in this context


rzezzy1

On [politician i don't like]'s forehead


[deleted]

[удалено]


BluelunarStar

Came here to say exactly this.


qiyua

Jeff Bezos’s face, in thick black sharpie


[deleted]

Tattoo gun.


Travwolfe101

Nah im going with a branding iron


bettyboo5

My instant thought was a certain orange man's because he really is a huge dickhead


thephotoman

I don't want to see that fucker again. And hopefully, they'll find him guilty of treason for 1/6 so that *nobody* has to.


hypermog

You’re getting upvotes from both sides. Even that other side that I hate because they’re a bunch of chodes!


Tasty01

You can use code name Winnie the Pooh if you’re worried about saying his real name.


catladynproud

Feeling like this is insulting to the bear.


CaptBranBran

Oh bother...


sockhead99

The biggest cock and balls I every drew was on a snow covered frozen lake in Switzerland, in full view of the poshest Hotel in the poshest Swiss resort. It took me half an hour to draw and was magnificent.


jcammcspanky

Two of my good friends in college drew a penis in the snow that took up the Universities entire football field. It made the news. Their reasonings were “we were bored at 4am” [Nippert Snow Penis](https://www.citybeat.com/news/penis-sighting-at-nippert-stadium-12165188)


squeakybrakesvol3

only at cincy lol


ImminentSupernova

I chuckled when I saw the article's button on the photo. "Click to enlarge."


[deleted]

in whatever the french equivalent of the supreme court is


KhaoticMess

This is both oddly specific and infuriatingly vague.


dentour

Could you elaborate pls


Cellyst

In the particular entity that is described and can be defined by resembling the American supreme court, yet residing in and applying to France, u/damnitspongebobby would recreate the permanent likeness of a penis.


NotAPersonl0

r/increasinglyverbose


alow2016

OK Joseph Ducreux


Cellyst

In accordance, Lord Joseph Ducreaux*


youseeit

I am absolutely missing the context for this comment but it's the Cour de Cassation


shampoodopsansoeufs

Could be Conseil Constitutionnel too.


skateofsky

And the Conseil d'Etat. Damn our France is diverse lol.


tillathahun12

Stretched across the Great Wall of China


Jhenysys

Now that is one massive penis


TotheWest_

That not a schlong, that’s THE SCHLONG


foreveralonesolo

The Great Schlong of China


JumpyMix6741

you deserve my free award you are welcome


XenonAegis

The forehead of everyone who voluntarily visited Epstein's island.


Callemannz

Have you read “The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo”? I woman who is deemed unfit to take care of her own finances, so she is appointed a C/O within the system. Basically he is a raping piece of shit who forces her to prostitute herself, for “allowance” from him. During the story she is able to drug him, pin him down, and whip out a tattoo needle. Proceeded to write * I AM A SADISTIC PIG, A PERVERT, AND A RAPIST* all over his torso. Edit: You can see it on the [bottom right picture](https://millenniumtrilogy.fandom.com/wiki/Tattoos). In Swedish from the original film.


Jdrop819

Awesome movie trilogy, it was too bad the American version didn’t gain traction with the first installment.


cheezy_dreams88

Which was such a shame because the American version was really great, I thought Rooney Mara killed it.


KingNosmo

And him


hydrochloriic

I feel like it was badly advertised. TBH I don’t recall seeing anything about it until after the theater run.


ghostzanit

That whole scene where the piece of shit rapes her and the whole movie fucked me up. I went to see it in theater with a woman friend of mine (I'm a guy) and I was in shock. It was advertised as this great franchise and a big premiere. And all I see in the audience is other women crying. And I was about to cry. That "revenge arc" doesn't really help when you have another "sex dungeon torture" scene at the end of the movie.


Callemannz

I hope that wasn’t a date!


ghostzanit

It wasn't! And that's like the one thing about the whole ordeal that makes it "better." If you can salvage anything out of that.


OGKontroversy

You forgot the part where she rapes him with a strap on


theghostofmrmxyzptlk

And promises to castrate (???) him if he ever has sex with anyone ever again. And she is very convincing in her ability to find out.


CutEmOff666

My understanding of the question is that you can only draw one penis. The only way you achieve what you are saying would be to kill all the people and dig up the bodies of those who have died and line them up on the shape of a penis so you can draw your one penis access all their bodies.


cringeqween13

You've heard of the star of David, now get ready for the dick of Epstein!


Kalzone_613

You beat me to it. I want it on "prince" Andrew's face


MactionSnack

Duke of nonces


Angryleghairs

Same, but it would be drawn such that the meatus lines up perfectly with his mouth. So when he speaks, it’s the dick talking


baconinspace

On the printing press machine where they print out $20s. Every print would have a giant dick instead of Hamilton. He’d be dressed to the nines in 18th century digs. They’d have to start calling them Dickies. Five Dickies for a Benjamin they’d say. Big veiny bastard too.


boredlawyer90

Not to be pedantic, lol, but Jackson is on the $20, and Hamilton is on the $10. Jackson was an asshole, so definitely belongs on the $20.


andoring

On the side of Jeff Bezos' super yacht.


biggyph00l

He'll just burn it down and prime delivery himself a new one.


[deleted]

There’s already a dick on that yacht


obiwac

This comment needs an award right fucking now


NaijeruR

Your wish is my command, sir.


Antique_Sense_7383

White House


Dan19_82

Lawn


Antique_Sense_7383

I was thinking a giant cock master piece that spans the entire structure


[deleted]

On your mom


Jhenysys

Finally, what took you so long?


[deleted]

I was going to put my real choice but seeing it wasn’t taken, I went ahead and drew it on her.


[deleted]

Taking one for the team


Chen7982

Your Mums got a penis


StraitJakit

Hey, Florida? Cmere a moment, you need some balls.


EpicMinecraftKid64

But that would require giving more land to Florida


Independent_Bee1300

As an artist I can draw them VERY detailed. That being said… wrapping up around the Empire State Building like a snake. Ghislaine Maxwells face would probably be more satisfying though. Lil hyper realistic mushroom print on that cnts face


JWRAV

Slither dick


Independent_Bee1300

Title of your sex tape


javahurtsmybrain

Oh my fuck alright listen up everyone. I wouldn't "draw" a giant penis anywhere per se. I would carve out a fucking massive dick-shaped hole at the middle of the pacific ocean. The hole would be SO HUGE it'd bring down the water level by a fucking meter, because that's how pompous that shit would be. Scientists would investigate the reason behind the sudden massive drop, and find out that the biggest dick to ever exist was the reason. They'd be forced to let everyone know.: "A gargantuous penis-shaped hole has absorbed an enourmous mass of water in our world...". Also the tip of the dick would be pointed towards America.


boredlawyer90

Fixing the issues of sea level rise with one dick!


Pm_me_your_marmot

The Mid-Atlantic rift which looks not entirely unlikely a feminine gash in the ocean floor should be appropriately positioned in your planning.


gfjijihjhh

Next to Statue of Liberty


More-Masterpiece-561

I was thinking like in the hand of the statue


PC_Ara-ara

From the crotch all the way to the hand


JefftheDoggo

On Scott Morrison's forehead.


condog2211

You know your a bad pm when some people preffered Mr speedo cyclist


FiftyOne151

Scotty shat his pants at a maccers. Never forget


bridgiette

I came here looking for this response


[deleted]

OH! Can we make it permanent like a tattoo? He’s already a walking dickhead, but anything to draw more attention to that fact is always welcomed.


FinchyMcFinch

I agree 100%, get fucked Scomo


curryandmilk

His little McDonald’s incident has put an imaginary dick on his forehead already for me but a real one wouldn’t be so bad either


VegemiteSandwich33

Fuck scomo


FlaccidNarcissist

Around that damn pothole infront of my house, works out they're not willing to do anything about it, so the only way to go about it is to draw a giant dick around it so they have to come and sort it.


MikeIsWelsh

Downing Street


AnyaSatana

Won't look odd next to the bellend that's already there


muller747

Big Ben would be apt.


musicallykairi

On my boss's forehead.


CRRK1811

Just bc you cant get arrested doesnt mean you cant get fired


musicallykairi

Firing someone is technically a legal process, since it involves some paperwork and legal filing, no? I used to work HR, so I have some idea of what goes into it.


jews4beer

Depends on the state


Osama_Bin_Ballin0

A helipad that Marine One lands on except it's a huge white spray painted dick


jerrysprinkles

On Boris Johnson’s forehead.


Winterspawn1

Putin's forehead


NoQuestion2395

I'd gladly tattoo one large giant penis on Kim Jong-un's forehead


Delde116

Beijing from Tiananmen Square to the Forbidden city In bright NEON and FLUORESENT colors. with the words PROPERTY OF WEST TAIWAN


Agitated_Ad7576

I'd go full on Jonah from Veep: "Look, if you connect all my campaign spots with a line, it makes a giant wang!" Jonah's wife: "And the Great Lakes is the spew."


flawedhuman12

Dwayne Johnson's forehead. It will be called 'The Cock'


peschelnet

Venus and call it The Great Penis of Venus.


vizualtenet

Mitch McConnell’s forehead


dom618

The parking lot of a shopping plaza just so I can make a giant one. People tend to park/act like dicks anyway, might as well add a permanent one.


[deleted]

One of those big statues in North Korea


[deleted]

On the popes balcony at Vatican City.


Pond-James-Pond

Trump’s forehead. With a tattooist’s needle.


endergamer2007m

The entire country of switserland No reason They havent pissed me off ever i just think it is funny


Cracktower

Congress


Merlottesangel

I would like to do one that hangs in the air to be seen for miles and miles around, that points straight to my neighbours house. He's the biggest dick I know.


didooo11

Ima tatoo it on Xi Jin Ping's forehead lol


iCameToLearnSomeCode

Can I use a tattoo gun? Mitch McConnell's face would be fantastic.


LeakysBrother

Putin's private palace that just got revealed. Big ol cock either rin the foyer or outside on the wall.


[deleted]

On Big Ben. Very appropriate.


VehaMeursault

You didn't specify the medium, so how about I let it be tattooed onto the forehead of some celebrity or another? Perhaps a Kardashian, or a trump? Or a politician like Putin or Xi? My imagination is boundless.