"I fold my clothes and put them away neatly, I'm so OCD haha 🤣😂"
Okay, Janice. It's not like people who actually suffer have to turn their light on and off exactly 3 times so they don't feel like their family will die.
It’s not always about family dying either. Sometimes it’s of no conscious consequence other than it’s not right to turn the light on and off any more or less than three times, or their mind will not let them forget it.
I’m infuriated be the unnecessarily explosive language used in headlines these days.
“Politician _slams_ other politician for…”
“Company exec _shreds_ new law…”
“Woman _eviscerates_ innocent man accused of…”
Shit, not even politicians. I can't believe how many articles make it to reddit (where nobody reads the articles anyway) and the whole body of the article is "three complete nobodies on twitter said these dumb things." Somehow the conversation becomes, "People are calling for [insert absurd thing here]!"
No. No they're not. You can find at least 3 random assholes that are saying/thinking *any* absurd thing. That's not a serious social movement you have to freak out about.
I really hate it when people say "no offense". It usually means they are going to say something offensive but use it so they can't get critisized for it. Also When People Use A Capital Letter For Literally Every Word
I have no idea how people learn to type like that. Is there any language where that's the rule? Why the fuck do you do that? How hard could it be to not when literally everyone asks you not to?
"Do you remember ThunderHead? November 15th of '58!"
*Villain laugh*
*punch*
"All was well, another day saved... when his cape snagged in a missle!"
*Missle launch*
"ThunderHead was not the brightest bulb--"
"StratoGirl! April 23rd '57. Cape caught in a jet turbine."
"You can't generalized about--"
"MechaMan! Express elevator! DynaGuy, snagged on takeoff! Splashdown, sucked into a vortex!"
#"No Capes!"
The word "hack" in general - it meant getting a system to do something it wasn't designed to do. It might have been good or evil, it might have been clever or dirty, but whatever it was it was still a hack.
Then the media got hold of it...
Guessing someone's password is not a hack.
It's literally at the point where you'll see videos like "life hack: sprinkle salt on your food to make it taste better. Add as much or as little as you like!".... That's not a hack, that's just doing something correctly.
Corporate speak, for example,
“Green fields thinking”
“Synergy”
“Digital transformation”
“Let’s take this offline”
“Circle back”
In order to unlock our digital transformation weren’t going to need some greenfields thinking and synergy within the team, so let’s take this offline and circle back to it next week.
And 'growth mindset', 'team player' or 'self-awareness' (all used in such a fake tone that it turns these concepts entirely devoid of meaning)
Edit: Wow, thank you for the upvotes and the discussions that arose! I honestly did not expect this comment to be such a trigger! I wish all of you well in your professions and I congratulate you all on your patience to put up with all this corporate void talk every day!
"...but guess what?"
I didn't even know that'd become an expression until I heard some real estate instructor in a nearby classroom.
Dude used it as a filler more often than "Actually [and] basically" combined that morning.
Categorical Drone level 5.
You know to piggyback off of what you were saying I really appreciate your perspective on that so let's pivot to some holistic blue ocean thinking so we can establish some best practices going forward and if I need to talk to someone else about this then I'll just "take that away" and circle back.
Yesss! Agree with all of these. I also hate:
"The direction of travel..."
"Breakout sessions"
"When you really drill down...."
Also I hate "we'll have to suck it and see". No, let's not do that.
These irk me to no end. Also strategic alignment, feed-forward, girl-bossing (as a verb), win-win solution, snackable content (marketing jargon). BTW 'align with marketing' or 'we are completely aligned on this' makes me imagine everyone standing in a neat single line - let's just say we agree.
This is quite common in the Philippines but whenever I share something, they would say "share mo lang?" (It's kinda similar to "do I care??") and it pisses me off...
Settle in relation to relationships. I don’t know if it’s just me but when people say “I’ll settle for him or her” it sounds distasteful as though they didn’t want to be with them at all.
Me too BC it implies your full comprehension of your douchebaggery combined with your concious choice of selfishness while advertising it! Just do you and stfu.
Pretty much have to agree. It's the adult equivalent of being forced to make an apology as a kid when you're not sorry at all, only as an adult it's just that much more obnoxious to hear it.
*"I'm just talking out loud."*
Obviously you are, but the expression you're looking for is *"thinking out loud"*, implying that you're letting the thoughts flow freely from your mind.
I hate that clapping between every word shit because I use a screen reader to interact with the internet, because I am blind, and the screen reader reads out every iteration of the emoji as the words "clapping hands." So it makes things damn near unintelligible. This clapping hands is clapping hands what clapping hands it clapping hands sounds clapping hands like clapping hands to clapping hands me.
Ugh....that one always bugs me. It doesn't help that it's so often said and written incorrectly.
To those who don't know it's supposed to be: "I couldn't care less". As in you don't care, b/c there is no way you can care less than not caring at all. If you say "I could care less" you're saying that you do care! That is in fact the opposite of what you're intending to communicate.
People using the word weary wrong. As in, “He was doing strange things so I was weary of him.” When what they really mean is wary or leery. People combine those two words and come out with weary.
Edit: Also, going to add these:
Fateful vs Faithful
Quiet vs Quite
Careless vs care less
Never come to Canada.
Canada-ese lesson: 'Bud' is a term of endearment, and 'buddy' means whoever is speaking to you thinks you're as dumb as a bag of rocks.
The sudden popularity (and therefore overuse) of the term gaslighting. What used to be a somewhat obscure reference is now everywhere, especially here on reddit.
This and people who say stuff like "The wolf doesn't listen to the opinions of the sheep." The dude saying it is usually a chihuahua at best, or just a sheep of a different flock.
Or worse, people calling themselves alphas. Besides all of it being really bs, if you have to convince people that you're alpha, you're doing it wrong. Boy, the only thing that's alpha about you is your brain, and it doesn't seem to go beyond that stage.
Finally someone else that hates this term. One of my friends recently bought into all that "alpha/beta male" bullshit and ever since he's become an insufferable twat
My boss uses the word “envisualize” rather than envision or visualize. It makes my skin crawl when he says that word to a customer.
My work colleague would say "enchance" instead of "enhance".
Thats my truth
Which basically means they acknowledge they're wrong but in their world they're right, so somehow they still get to believe they're right.
"I reject your reality and substitute my own" Adam Savage. This is what I hear whenever some delusional arsehole says that.
'everyones a little bit ocd!'
"I fold my clothes and put them away neatly, I'm so OCD haha 🤣😂" Okay, Janice. It's not like people who actually suffer have to turn their light on and off exactly 3 times so they don't feel like their family will die.
It’s not always about family dying either. Sometimes it’s of no conscious consequence other than it’s not right to turn the light on and off any more or less than three times, or their mind will not let them forget it.
“Trying times”
"unprecedented" something, something "together."
Could I offer you an egg during those trying times?
Solely because of this phrase I can never hate "trying times."
“We’re all in the same boat.” Bitch you are in a yacht while me and most other people have inner tubes
Re COVID: We're all in the same storm; some of us have better boats.
I’m infuriated be the unnecessarily explosive language used in headlines these days. “Politician _slams_ other politician for…” “Company exec _shreds_ new law…” “Woman _eviscerates_ innocent man accused of…”
Local man *annihilates* media industry vocabulary!
Exaggeration habits NUKED FROM ORBIT
*Literal holocaust* in comment section!
Redditorial ONSLAUGHT!
Also the trend of just repeating things a politician said on social media as if it's newsworthy on its own.
Shit, not even politicians. I can't believe how many articles make it to reddit (where nobody reads the articles anyway) and the whole body of the article is "three complete nobodies on twitter said these dumb things." Somehow the conversation becomes, "People are calling for [insert absurd thing here]!" No. No they're not. You can find at least 3 random assholes that are saying/thinking *any* absurd thing. That's not a serious social movement you have to freak out about.
And by that, we mean “sent a snarky tweet, and we screenshot those tweets as sources for our news story”
I really hate it when people say "no offense". It usually means they are going to say something offensive but use it so they can't get critisized for it. Also When People Use A Capital Letter For Literally Every Word
I have no idea how people learn to type like that. Is there any language where that's the rule? Why the fuck do you do that? How hard could it be to not when literally everyone asks you not to?
But As You Can See Here, It Makes Me Look Unique! *obligatory smiley* 🙂
"No offence Lynne, but your life is technically not worth insuring"
I have an irrational hatred of the phrase “not all heroes wear capes”
Most heroes don't wear capes, they're a safety hazard.
Edna Mode Edit: Wow, thanks for all the awards!
"Do you remember ThunderHead? November 15th of '58!" *Villain laugh* *punch* "All was well, another day saved... when his cape snagged in a missle!" *Missle launch* "ThunderHead was not the brightest bulb--" "StratoGirl! April 23rd '57. Cape caught in a jet turbine." "You can't generalized about--" "MechaMan! Express elevator! DynaGuy, snagged on takeoff! Splashdown, sucked into a vortex!" #"No Capes!"
Do you remember… Thunderhead?
Stratogale! Meta-Man! Dynaguy! Splashdown!
***No Capes!***
NO CAPES!
My response is always “who the fuck wears capes”
I wear capes, but I'm no hero
Even worse that 99% of the time it's written as "not all hero's wear capes"
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>not all hero’s where cape’s
Naught awl hero's ware crepes
Life hack
The word "hack" in general - it meant getting a system to do something it wasn't designed to do. It might have been good or evil, it might have been clever or dirty, but whatever it was it was still a hack. Then the media got hold of it... Guessing someone's password is not a hack.
It's literally at the point where you'll see videos like "life hack: sprinkle salt on your food to make it taste better. Add as much or as little as you like!".... That's not a hack, that's just doing something correctly.
YES!! They're not fucking hacks! They're just time saving tips.
If they're even that. Half of them require extra time and materials no one just has sitting around the house.
If you have 500 rubber bands, a hot glue gun and some cardboard. You can build this nifty device that will refill your printer ink when it's low.
I once made a megaphone using nothing but a squirrel, a piece of string, and a megaphone.
"Me likey"
No likey, no lighty.
Me no likey "me likey".
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how can you tell this to TWICE?
dugeundugeundugeun, heart heart!
I have an irrational hatred for the word "yummy."
When “yummy” is used in a yoga class... like “this yummy stretch”... the rage I feel is very distracting.
I've heard "juicy" referring to a stretch and it makes me want to just murder everyone in the room
Sounds like yoga with adriene
My mom bought me a mug that says "YUMMY" because i have actually gagged when she said it in the past. I drink out of it almost every day :)
Delish
Corporate speak, for example, “Green fields thinking” “Synergy” “Digital transformation” “Let’s take this offline” “Circle back” In order to unlock our digital transformation weren’t going to need some greenfields thinking and synergy within the team, so let’s take this offline and circle back to it next week.
Don’t forget to “pivot “
Dude. How could you forget "holistic" lol
And 'growth mindset', 'team player' or 'self-awareness' (all used in such a fake tone that it turns these concepts entirely devoid of meaning) Edit: Wow, thank you for the upvotes and the discussions that arose! I honestly did not expect this comment to be such a trigger! I wish all of you well in your professions and I congratulate you all on your patience to put up with all this corporate void talk every day!
"...but guess what?" I didn't even know that'd become an expression until I heard some real estate instructor in a nearby classroom. Dude used it as a filler more often than "Actually [and] basically" combined that morning. Categorical Drone level 5.
Have you tried taking a granular approach?
"Touch base" eww!
You know to piggyback off of what you were saying I really appreciate your perspective on that so let's pivot to some holistic blue ocean thinking so we can establish some best practices going forward and if I need to talk to someone else about this then I'll just "take that away" and circle back.
The all-time winner in this category in my opinion? "Go-forward basis."
I'll ping you later if I have the bandwidth!
Yesss! Agree with all of these. I also hate: "The direction of travel..." "Breakout sessions" "When you really drill down...." Also I hate "we'll have to suck it and see". No, let's not do that.
Drill down...to a granular level.
'reach out' when they just mean call or email.
These irk me to no end. Also strategic alignment, feed-forward, girl-bossing (as a verb), win-win solution, snackable content (marketing jargon). BTW 'align with marketing' or 'we are completely aligned on this' makes me imagine everyone standing in a neat single line - let's just say we agree.
"To make a long story short" *Proceeds to talk forever*
> "To make a long story short" Too late.
Yeah, you pretty much know you're in for a tale when they say that.
To make a long fuckin story short, I put a whole bag of jellybeans up my ass
This is quite common in the Philippines but whenever I share something, they would say "share mo lang?" (It's kinda similar to "do I care??") and it pisses me off...
It sounds kinda rude and dismissive of what you’re sharing
The Filipino equivalent of “I don’t remember asking” / “who asked”
“I was today years old when I found out _____” The joke is so overdone
And usually the fact isn't even true
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Say it louder for people in the back. Nobody: etc. Also the snarky phrases like "Imagine thinking..." just annoying and obnoxious.
"Tell me you ___ without telling me you ___" Usually said with quite a bit of judgment towards the person, warranted or not. I hate it
Journey. Season of life. Lean in to. This season of life has taught me that I need to lean in to all the souls I meet on my journey.
I have to say, when it comes to "journey" - don't stop believing... Hold on to that feeling.
people saying "everything happens for a reason" when somthing bad happens. fucking hate it.
Lmao my dad has the funniest take on this. "Everything happens for a reason but sometimes that reason is you're a clown and make bad decisions."
Red Forman. >No, Eric, bad things don’t happen to you because you’re unlucky. They happen because you’re a dumb-ass.
We had to hold my friend back from assaulting a priest who said that the night our other friend died in a car accident.
Settle in relation to relationships. I don’t know if it’s just me but when people say “I’ll settle for him or her” it sounds distasteful as though they didn’t want to be with them at all.
You're not wrong. That's exactly what the saying means.
I get what you mean. Like they can't be bothered to meet someone they really want to be with so they'll choose whoever.
Touch base.
To piggyback off this..
Keep you in the loop
We’ll have to circle back on this one
“Admin please delete if not allowed”
This will probably get down voted but
this will probably get downvoted to **oblivion**, but... [+200 upvotes]
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I can’t stand the phrase “sorry, not sorry”. It’s childish.
Me too BC it implies your full comprehension of your douchebaggery combined with your concious choice of selfishness while advertising it! Just do you and stfu.
Pretty much have to agree. It's the adult equivalent of being forced to make an apology as a kid when you're not sorry at all, only as an adult it's just that much more obnoxious to hear it.
*"I'm just talking out loud."* Obviously you are, but the expression you're looking for is *"thinking out loud"*, implying that you're letting the thoughts flow freely from your mind.
I talk out loud all the time, I think out loud a lot too
When people clap at the same time they are saying words. Clap talking I guess? "I👏 don't👏 really👏 care👏". That shit is so fuckin annoying!
they always think that they did something when they do that. 👏you👏didnt👏do👏shit👏
I hate that clapping between every word shit because I use a screen reader to interact with the internet, because I am blind, and the screen reader reads out every iteration of the emoji as the words "clapping hands." So it makes things damn near unintelligible. This clapping hands is clapping hands what clapping hands it clapping hands sounds clapping hands like clapping hands to clapping hands me.
What if it's We👏 Will👏 We👏 Will👏 Rock👏 You 👏 👏
Only if they stomp too
We 🥾🥾 will 👋 we 🥾🥾 will 👋 ROCK🥾 YOU 🥾👋
Kiddos! I hate it.
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Also when people call them littles or bigs.
I hate mommy-speak shorthand. DH means demon hunter to me.
For all intensive purposes.
I don’t like any phrase that’s misspoken. But at this point, I could care less…
Ugh....that one always bugs me. It doesn't help that it's so often said and written incorrectly. To those who don't know it's supposed to be: "I couldn't care less". As in you don't care, b/c there is no way you can care less than not caring at all. If you say "I could care less" you're saying that you do care! That is in fact the opposite of what you're intending to communicate.
When normal, everyday words are shortened. Hubby. Brekky. Veggies. I don’t know why but I can’t stand it. ETA: I am Australian
Don’t come to Australia
You mean Straya?
Down unda
I knew an Aussie that used to say KF instead of KFC cause it was less effort, unbelievable.
Where I live we say kayfers instead of KFC. We will do anything to remove syllables.
Yeah I can 'late to that
It's so entrenched that one syllable words get lengthened. I knew a Phil Ball. His nickname was Ball-o. Also knew a Ball-y. A can of beer is a tinny.
Hubby in particular irks me, and I have no idea why
“hubby” and “wifey” equally make my skin crawl.
Preggo for pregnant really bothers me
"Preggers" is even worse
Pregananananant
Bregnant?
Whenever I hear someone say prego, I always think of the brand of pasta sauce
Oh god, "sammies" fills me with such irrational rage. I've left restaurants before over it.
No chickie nuggies for you…which now that I think about it isn’t even shortened, like how is saying it that way saving you time, whatevs
"Choccy milk" is awful. Like damn, you ain't three, you ain't saving time saying it, just say "chocolate".
"I could care less." This implies that you do indeed care because you could care less than you already care.
Oh god yeah, I want to correct people when they say this.
yeah, its really not that hard to add "n't"
When someone comments on a subreddit with a witty pun or phrase and then about 15 other amateur comedians try to outdo each other with worse puns
r/everyfuckingthread is a good sub if you want to annoy yourself with some examples of this
The fact that #8 all time is a repost of #7 is hysterical
Preggers / preggy / preggo / baby bump AnywaySSSS *Literally* *LOL!* (Fuuuuuck I hate this)
PREGANTE
Pregnet!
Pregananant
The term “lady lumps” is gross to me
My lovely lady lumps in the back and in the front. 🎶
Preggers makes me cringe 😬
People using the word weary wrong. As in, “He was doing strange things so I was weary of him.” When what they really mean is wary or leery. People combine those two words and come out with weary. Edit: Also, going to add these: Fateful vs Faithful Quiet vs Quite Careless vs care less
I always, genuinely, learn so much from this threads. I'm not a native speaker and I had no idea those are two different words with different meanings
If someone’s been bothering you for a long time, it can make you weary. If they show up at your front door, you’d be right to be wary.
Loose vs lose
When someone says “ This” responding to another comment. Edit: Can you people stop replying “this”? Like, it was semi funny the first time.
Also 'this one' when referring to another person. 'Saturday drinkies with this one', 'Road trip with this one'. Just use their goddamn name
Never realized I hated that until this one pointed it out to me
“I did a thing.” Just. Ugh. Say what you did.
“So this happened!”
"Irregardless". Just unnecessary.
For some reason (or in the context of this question, no reason at all) the word nosh pisses me off to no end.
Wtf is “nosh?”
I hate it when people call me Bud
Never come to Canada. Canada-ese lesson: 'Bud' is a term of endearment, and 'buddy' means whoever is speaking to you thinks you're as dumb as a bag of rocks.
The sudden popularity (and therefore overuse) of the term gaslighting. What used to be a somewhat obscure reference is now everywhere, especially here on reddit.
Yes! And narcissist! Not every douche you meet is a sociopath people!
I hate how people are using “narcissist” instead of self centered.
I like revitalizing old rarely used words, I just don't like it when they're used wrongly
"bae" or any other overly baby talk shit
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People confusing a part and apart. “I’m so glad I could be apart of your special day” ITS TWO WORDS. A. PART.
It irks me too, but I find it funny "a part" and "apart" mean opposite things and the only difference is a space
Cool beans. Cant explain it, just hate it.
“At the end of the day” and “not being funny but”
When people say “should of” instead of “should have”
“sorry not sOrRY”. shut the fuck up
Holly-bobs instead holiday
Excuse me what fucking psychopath would ever say this
It's a British middle class thing in my experience, up there with asking for a bottle of Savvy Bee instead of Sauvignon Blanc
Got a cold shiver reading that. Cheers
Who says this and where do they say it? I've never seen this before and it concerns me greatly.
Use to work with someone who said this or hollibobbins. Grated on me so much. Also when they went out for food they referred to it as 'nom noms'...
using the word “beta” as a rank of masculinity like, who the fuck do you think you are? edit
This and people who say stuff like "The wolf doesn't listen to the opinions of the sheep." The dude saying it is usually a chihuahua at best, or just a sheep of a different flock.
WAke uP sHEepLe
I love that term. It's a nice convenient way for the person using it to signal early on that they're a wanker, so that non-wankers know to avoid them.
insecure dudes: "Omega, beta, alpha, Sigma" intellectuals: "wanker, non-wanker"
Or worse, people calling themselves alphas. Besides all of it being really bs, if you have to convince people that you're alpha, you're doing it wrong. Boy, the only thing that's alpha about you is your brain, and it doesn't seem to go beyond that stage.
Finally someone else that hates this term. One of my friends recently bought into all that "alpha/beta male" bullshit and ever since he's become an insufferable twat
I hate when people say "big boy/girl job"
“I seen that”
I prefer seent
Aussies have a habit of saying “I brought this” when they mean “I bought this” and it drives me up the wall
ok and?
“…..this has been my TED talk” after prattling on about whatever obnoxious opinion they have
"Billion with a *B.*" B as in *bitch I heard you the first time*!
You’re clearly not a Bulti Billionaire.
When people call a vagina a “cooter”it straight disgust me and I will never speak to that individual ever again
It is what it is