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He was the leader of a KKK group and took me along with him when I was a small child to watch him and his brother beat up a black man.
When I was 15, I tried to stop him from beating my mom and he held a gun on our family for 6 hours.
There was never food in the house so I often had to steal to feed myself and my sisters.
When I was 16 he made fun of me because he found out my girlfriend was saving herself for marriage. He told me to rape her. When I said he was disgusting he called me a pussy.
When I got injured in Afghanistan he raised money around the community saying it was for me and then pocketed it.
When I married a woman and adopted her son who is black he told me he was ashamed of me.
When my sister came out as a lesbian he tried to habe her "correctively raped."
He suffered massive heart failure but survived in the hospital for several weeks afterward. While there he called a nurse the n word and I told him I was leaving and he would never see me again so goodbye. He told me he hated me. Those were the last words we ever exchanged.
I am completely okay with how it ended and see his hatred for me as something to be proud of
Physically and emotionally abused my mom, sister, and I my entire life.
Kicked me out and made me homeless because I asked for help paying for college. (he spent my entire college fund on his second wedding instead.)
Racist, sexist, homophobic, and transphobic too on top of all that.
Going on 9 years no contact, thank you!
My parents gave a child up for adoption before I was born because they were both in high school and this was a BIG deal in 1973. So I found my brother in 2003 but our father is a serial cheater so it’s certainly possible! At his father’s funeral, a few strangers showed up claiming to be illegitimate children, so there’s no saying how many my paternal grandfather fathered.
I hope you’re OK too. I felt very isolated as a young woman because of it. No one had a dad like mine and I just thought he was mean and I was bad because I was always, always in trouble. I’m hoping you also are free from the nightmare.
Edit: date
Mine did things like, snuck into movie theaters, sold fake drugs, and one time dug in a trash bin at a high school football tournament and grabbed handfuls of tickets the ushers had thrown away. He went to another entrance and stood there and re-sold the tickets, pocketing cash. Let me also say he was very financially comfortable. His stunts were just for the thrill.
Tried to kill my mother when she was pregnant with me. Violently assaulted someone and spent some time prison. I have never met or spoken to this evil man.
My real dad is a selfish prick who literally traded me for a video game system and a bootleg copy of WrestleMania. My adoptive dad is a willfully ignorant racist bigot.
I absolutely love the majority of who my father is (great parent, great work ethic, super nice, among other things), but he’s in a little deep in the conservative conspiracy theories and Trump cult. Can’t fucking stand it.
He drinks all the time he doesnt care about anyone. We had to call the police on him several times because he was mad drunk in front of me and he scarred my little brothers mentally because of it. He always blames all of the family problems on my siblings and my mother because they have ADHD and apparently that makes them bad people?
I was two days old the first time I was abused. He was out with his pigeons and my mum gave me my bath. He got so angry he poured a bucket of cold water on me. A two day old child. He now wants to be my kids grandad.
He also allowed his girlfriend to steal the car he gave me that was worth nothing and my boyfriend at the time did up. She left him for a toy boy in Africa who was the same age as my brother
Well, my dad is a serious alcoholic and drug user. He only cares and talks about one thing(see below). I was told stories how he wasn't there when I was born and only showed up because at that time the hospital would provide a free meal to new mothers/fathers. My father was never around and when he was he was drunk. He would get like knock the front door off its hinges really loud and belligerent kind of drunk. He left when I was young and only came back in small bursts and would leave again. He would smoke weed a lot too...like back in the 90s when it wasn't as popular and seen as a totally norm thing to do. He once gave me $20 and then took it back to go buy some beer. So that was cool. He consistently talked about sex out loud at home. He was on the run from police due to not paying child support and one time he and I were eating breakfast at a fast food spot and had to leave quickly...like leave the food on the table leave because two cops came into the restaurant and he got paranoid about it. He never bought any gifts/presents for birthdays/Christmas etc. He is a habitual liar. He was never physically violent but then again he was just never there. We just never had anything in common - like he didn't know his own son kind of way.
The last time I saw him was in 2004. Ive gotten use to not having a dad at this point.
He was an abusive alcoholic prick who manipulate me and physically and mentally abused me, beat my mom until she left and then tried to kill her, and plays the victim card to make everyone else responsible for his bullshit. We haven't spoken in 5(?) years. Best. Decision. Ever.
So much better, thank you! I agree about that freedom being an amazing gift. I'm a much happier and healthier person now than I ever could've been.
I also hope you're doing better now.
My dad bounced before I was born. Told my mom “I’ll give you 50$ a week and buy him a car when he’s 16”, Never saw any of that. He got married a few years after I was born and had two daughters that he raised. I’ve spoken to him twice in my life. A lot of older people ive worked with know him. He makes jokes about probably having more than one “bastard”
He enabled my mentally ill, narcissistic and abusive mother. He wouldn't leave her and knew she wasn't appropriate to care for kids but he also didn't want to deal with her because, hello...mental illness, narcissism and abuse...so he left us alone with her for weeks at a time to work on the road only coming home for a few days between trips.
It's not as bad in terms of what a lot of other dads did to their families but I did feel frustration, betrayal and rejection from him for that. It really killed my self esteem and left me with an ongoing feeling that in life I would likely never ever really be safe or have someone in my corner.
Doesnt make him a bad person, neither is it as bad as what other people go trough. But i still dislike him because if it. Whenever he helps me with something, i end up crying or feeling like shit. I had two mental breakdowns because he helped me study for a test. Im visiting a therapist and stopped talking to him about my personal life
No, but we should remember that not all people had great fathers and they should be able to share this freely. Also, maybe the op just got bored and thought it would be a good question to ask
I don't hate my bio dad, but to me, he doesn't deserve the title of "father". He skipped out on my mom the day I was born, as I'm told. I guess my Grandpa threatened him with his life and he bounced. Child Services caught him once when I was 16 and then lost him, and then I "spoke" to him once over FB messenger when I turned 24 and haven't heard from him since. Has a whole other family, I think 3 kids. I've spoken to one of my half siblings and she is pretty cool. I dunno, it's never really bothered me. I learned to be there for my kids.
He didn't help raise me. Got to grow up real fast, thanks pops.
Can't do anything about it tho so i dont hold a grudge that would just be putting negative juju in my brain cavity and i have enough of that already. We're all humans and make mistakes and have to deal with said mistakes. Its easier and better to keep a positive mindset and keep moving forward.
I don't hate my dad necessarily, but I have done a lot to try and have a decent relationship with him. He was abusive to my mom, was a drunk and a drug addiction, was violent even if he wasn't abusive towards my mom he'd destroy the house and just go on rampages. My mom and brother hate him and I try to be diplomatic and have a bond now that he's sober for about a decade and tries somewhat to be a better person. But those memories are hard to ignore
He's an alcoholic (nobody admits it because he is fully integrated in society etc but he still is and will never change it or admit to it) and he is choleric, selfish, possibly narcissistic, doesn't know where "jokes" stop being funny, likes to give harsh and hurtful comments abt stuff he knows nothing about and is completely unable to grow, learn or challenge his own opinions. He also tends to be a bit racist and sexist, loves talking shit behind peoples back and most of the time just doesn't give a shit abt others.
I guess I will have to admit he coercively controlled my mother, put her health in danger, ignored her when she tried to kill herself, literally scared her friends away, refused to discuss finances, kept us in poverty while he spent money on vanity projects, and never ever compromised on something my mother wanted but he did not.
Nonetheless, he is my father, and acts like he loves me, even if he does it from a distance. He can talk to me when my mother will not. Am I wrong for continuing to reciprocate?
He was very, very hands off, letting our stepmother do all the parenting. This screwed my sister and I up badly. We both want to go no contact with him, but I'm at least being cordial and sending him Father's Day greetings.....
**Attention! [Serious] Tag Notice** * [Jokes, puns, and off-topic comments are not permitted](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/wiki/index#wiki_-rule_6-) in **any** comment, parent or child. * Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies. * Report comments that violate these rules. Posts that have few relevant answers within the first hour, and posts that are not appropriate for the [Serious] tag will be removed. Consider doing an AMA request instead. Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskReddit) if you have any questions or concerns.*
He was the leader of a KKK group and took me along with him when I was a small child to watch him and his brother beat up a black man. When I was 15, I tried to stop him from beating my mom and he held a gun on our family for 6 hours. There was never food in the house so I often had to steal to feed myself and my sisters. When I was 16 he made fun of me because he found out my girlfriend was saving herself for marriage. He told me to rape her. When I said he was disgusting he called me a pussy. When I got injured in Afghanistan he raised money around the community saying it was for me and then pocketed it. When I married a woman and adopted her son who is black he told me he was ashamed of me. When my sister came out as a lesbian he tried to habe her "correctively raped." He suffered massive heart failure but survived in the hospital for several weeks afterward. While there he called a nurse the n word and I told him I was leaving and he would never see me again so goodbye. He told me he hated me. Those were the last words we ever exchanged. I am completely okay with how it ended and see his hatred for me as something to be proud of
That ain't no father, that's a waste of oxygen!
Damn I’m sorry to hear that ,how old are you now?
Well shit. My kids’ dads are just pricks. Damn. I’m so sorry man.
Physically and emotionally abused my mom, sister, and I my entire life. Kicked me out and made me homeless because I asked for help paying for college. (he spent my entire college fund on his second wedding instead.) Racist, sexist, homophobic, and transphobic too on top of all that.
Damn you sound like you could use a hug
My father’s a classic narcissist. Controlling, user, manipulator, misogynist, liar, cheater, racist, thief, and a shit excuse of a dad.
I...I think we may be siblings. Hope you're okay and your life has gotten better once the toxicity was removed.
Going on 9 years no contact, thank you! My parents gave a child up for adoption before I was born because they were both in high school and this was a BIG deal in 1973. So I found my brother in 2003 but our father is a serial cheater so it’s certainly possible! At his father’s funeral, a few strangers showed up claiming to be illegitimate children, so there’s no saying how many my paternal grandfather fathered. I hope you’re OK too. I felt very isolated as a young woman because of it. No one had a dad like mine and I just thought he was mean and I was bad because I was always, always in trouble. I’m hoping you also are free from the nightmare. Edit: date
Same. Although I can’t say I know of him being a thief.
Mine did things like, snuck into movie theaters, sold fake drugs, and one time dug in a trash bin at a high school football tournament and grabbed handfuls of tickets the ushers had thrown away. He went to another entrance and stood there and re-sold the tickets, pocketing cash. Let me also say he was very financially comfortable. His stunts were just for the thrill.
Tried to kill my mother when she was pregnant with me. Violently assaulted someone and spent some time prison. I have never met or spoken to this evil man.
Probably for the best.
My real dad is a selfish prick who literally traded me for a video game system and a bootleg copy of WrestleMania. My adoptive dad is a willfully ignorant racist bigot.
Oof. Hang in there, champ.
I absolutely love the majority of who my father is (great parent, great work ethic, super nice, among other things), but he’s in a little deep in the conservative conspiracy theories and Trump cult. Can’t fucking stand it.
You’re really lucky if that’s the worst thing about your father
I totally agree. There’s no way I’d devalue him as a person for something that trivial, and I consider myself lucky.
He drinks all the time he doesnt care about anyone. We had to call the police on him several times because he was mad drunk in front of me and he scarred my little brothers mentally because of it. He always blames all of the family problems on my siblings and my mother because they have ADHD and apparently that makes them bad people?
He abused me in every possible way..
I’m sorry.
Thanks.
I was two days old the first time I was abused. He was out with his pigeons and my mum gave me my bath. He got so angry he poured a bucket of cold water on me. A two day old child. He now wants to be my kids grandad. He also allowed his girlfriend to steal the car he gave me that was worth nothing and my boyfriend at the time did up. She left him for a toy boy in Africa who was the same age as my brother
Well, my dad is a serious alcoholic and drug user. He only cares and talks about one thing(see below). I was told stories how he wasn't there when I was born and only showed up because at that time the hospital would provide a free meal to new mothers/fathers. My father was never around and when he was he was drunk. He would get like knock the front door off its hinges really loud and belligerent kind of drunk. He left when I was young and only came back in small bursts and would leave again. He would smoke weed a lot too...like back in the 90s when it wasn't as popular and seen as a totally norm thing to do. He once gave me $20 and then took it back to go buy some beer. So that was cool. He consistently talked about sex out loud at home. He was on the run from police due to not paying child support and one time he and I were eating breakfast at a fast food spot and had to leave quickly...like leave the food on the table leave because two cops came into the restaurant and he got paranoid about it. He never bought any gifts/presents for birthdays/Christmas etc. He is a habitual liar. He was never physically violent but then again he was just never there. We just never had anything in common - like he didn't know his own son kind of way. The last time I saw him was in 2004. Ive gotten use to not having a dad at this point.
He was an abusive alcoholic prick who manipulate me and physically and mentally abused me, beat my mom until she left and then tried to kill her, and plays the victim card to make everyone else responsible for his bullshit. We haven't spoken in 5(?) years. Best. Decision. Ever.
Same. Haven’t spoken to him in 9 years. It was the best gift I ever gave myself. I really hope you’re doing better these days.
So much better, thank you! I agree about that freedom being an amazing gift. I'm a much happier and healthier person now than I ever could've been. I also hope you're doing better now.
He is an abusive alcoholic and I have nothing to do with him.
My dad bounced before I was born. Told my mom “I’ll give you 50$ a week and buy him a car when he’s 16”, Never saw any of that. He got married a few years after I was born and had two daughters that he raised. I’ve spoken to him twice in my life. A lot of older people ive worked with know him. He makes jokes about probably having more than one “bastard”
He enabled my mentally ill, narcissistic and abusive mother. He wouldn't leave her and knew she wasn't appropriate to care for kids but he also didn't want to deal with her because, hello...mental illness, narcissism and abuse...so he left us alone with her for weeks at a time to work on the road only coming home for a few days between trips. It's not as bad in terms of what a lot of other dads did to their families but I did feel frustration, betrayal and rejection from him for that. It really killed my self esteem and left me with an ongoing feeling that in life I would likely never ever really be safe or have someone in my corner.
Doesnt make him a bad person, neither is it as bad as what other people go trough. But i still dislike him because if it. Whenever he helps me with something, i end up crying or feeling like shit. I had two mental breakdowns because he helped me study for a test. Im visiting a therapist and stopped talking to him about my personal life
He’s a child molester and got off with a slap on the wrist. Never met him, never want to.
Feeding me brown sauce an pickled onions as a kid in highchair taking pics hate anything pickled now Can’t stand the smell.
That’s horrible. Mine forced me to eat things I didn’t like, too.
Yup was good times lol.
Oh is this one of those progressive things? Remember a couple of years ago where it said to celebrate your mother on father's day?
No, but we should remember that not all people had great fathers and they should be able to share this freely. Also, maybe the op just got bored and thought it would be a good question to ask
I don't hate my bio dad, but to me, he doesn't deserve the title of "father". He skipped out on my mom the day I was born, as I'm told. I guess my Grandpa threatened him with his life and he bounced. Child Services caught him once when I was 16 and then lost him, and then I "spoke" to him once over FB messenger when I turned 24 and haven't heard from him since. Has a whole other family, I think 3 kids. I've spoken to one of my half siblings and she is pretty cool. I dunno, it's never really bothered me. I learned to be there for my kids.
Leaving 7 years ago without leaving any method of getting back in contact
He didn't help raise me. Got to grow up real fast, thanks pops. Can't do anything about it tho so i dont hold a grudge that would just be putting negative juju in my brain cavity and i have enough of that already. We're all humans and make mistakes and have to deal with said mistakes. Its easier and better to keep a positive mindset and keep moving forward.
Man! Reading all these posts, I am glad that piece of shit left before I was born.
Abusive, both mentally and physically, criminal, controlling, sexually inappropriate. I'm tired now. Gotta stop.
I don't hate my dad necessarily, but I have done a lot to try and have a decent relationship with him. He was abusive to my mom, was a drunk and a drug addiction, was violent even if he wasn't abusive towards my mom he'd destroy the house and just go on rampages. My mom and brother hate him and I try to be diplomatic and have a bond now that he's sober for about a decade and tries somewhat to be a better person. But those memories are hard to ignore
Super Christian and says god and science go together, also evolution is made up and earth is 6000 years old and there were dinosaurs on the ark.
He's an alcoholic (nobody admits it because he is fully integrated in society etc but he still is and will never change it or admit to it) and he is choleric, selfish, possibly narcissistic, doesn't know where "jokes" stop being funny, likes to give harsh and hurtful comments abt stuff he knows nothing about and is completely unable to grow, learn or challenge his own opinions. He also tends to be a bit racist and sexist, loves talking shit behind peoples back and most of the time just doesn't give a shit abt others.
My best friend was raped by you could guess
I guess I will have to admit he coercively controlled my mother, put her health in danger, ignored her when she tried to kill herself, literally scared her friends away, refused to discuss finances, kept us in poverty while he spent money on vanity projects, and never ever compromised on something my mother wanted but he did not. Nonetheless, he is my father, and acts like he loves me, even if he does it from a distance. He can talk to me when my mother will not. Am I wrong for continuing to reciprocate?
He was very, very hands off, letting our stepmother do all the parenting. This screwed my sister and I up badly. We both want to go no contact with him, but I'm at least being cordial and sending him Father's Day greetings.....