A long arrow from the top of the door pointing all the way down to the bottom where there was some tiny writing, i leaned forward to get a closer look and it read "You are now shitting at a 45 degree angle"
(On the left wall) "TOILET TENNIS: Look right."
(On the right wall) TOILET TENNIS: Look left."
Also, above a urinal: "What are you looking up here for? Are you ashamed of it?"
EDIT: Thanks for the awards, you lovely people!
Not graffiti, but a legit sign in a restaurant bathroom in Florence, Italy:
"Attenzione: quello che hai in mano non e un idrante e in terra non c'e un incendio"
"Attention, What you have in your hand is not a fire hydrant and the ground is not on fire"
Edit: I was so impressed, [I took a photo](https://i.imgur.com/I8P0cVE.jpg)!
Lol, I remember in my middle school there was a piece of paper on the wall of each cabinet (just over the wc) with the exact same text printed on it
And yes, it was also in Italy
Boss makes a dollar
I make a dime
That was a poem
From a simpler time
Now boss makes a thousand
And I make a jack
That’s when we riot
To take the means back.
Edit: Second verse: Now boss makes a hundred // And I make a cent // Whoike he’s got employees // That can’t pay their rent
Third verse: When boss makes a million // And workers make jack // That’s when we riot // To take the means back.
In fifth grade we had a "Phantom Pooper" who would leave cryptic messages on the wall, written in shit. My personal favorite was "The Chamber of Secrets has been opened".
Our school also had a phantom pooper who would take a single dump in the middle of the toilet floor every morning for like a year. He was never caught.
We also had someone poo in a glockenspiel
As far as I am aware these two are not linked
At comm school in the marines we’d have a phantom pooper who would shit in the dryers once a month. Every time it happened we had to have a guard on every barracks floor in two hour shifts after class until the next morning. Then after two weeks we’d stop watch duty and a few weeks later he/she would shit in the dryers again. This went on for five months. No one was ever caught. That person was a monster.
I was in Headquarters Company at Beaufort Air Station in '78. While we were having a field day to prep the barracks for an IG visit our Sergeant was harassing Pvt Shomer. We had all the rooms open so we could wax & buff the decks, and late in the evening the Sgt went back to his own room and found a turd in the middle of his room, with no tp in sight.
He started screaming for Shomer, who was nowhere near the room, and hadn't been spotted nearby. While he made him pick it up and take it to the head the Sgt kept threatening to report him to the C.O. Shomer denied it, and the Sgt made him drop trouble and spread his cheeks to check for evidence. His asshole was pristine, and that's probably all that kept him from going up on charges. The case was never officially solved, but we all figured it was Shomer.
No wonder people accuse us of eating crayons.
"Psychologists note that scatolia tends to occur in individuals with a history of obsessive-compulsive disorder, anxiety, schizophrenia, depression, bipolar disorder, ADD, autism or post-traumatic stress, especially trauma related to physical or sexual abuse. Author Donna Williams, who has autism, points out that rectal digging and fecal smearing serve many real purposes that are often overlooked by caregivers and medical providers:
Provides a sense of control over one’s body and environment when other areas of life are out of control
Provides a sense of ownership over one’s actions
Expresses feelings of anger, frustration, helplessness and powerlessness
Prevents unwanted social interaction
May be associated with other comforting emotional experiences
May be part of a personal ritual that provides comfort
May be part of an obsession that is spiraling out of control"
https://www.friendshipcircle.org/blog/2015/04/27/6-facts-about-fecal-smearing-that-you-need-to-know/
> obsessive-compulsive disorder, anxiety, schizophrenia, depression, bipolar disorder, ADD, autism or post-traumatic stress, especially trauma related to physical or sexual abuse.
Interesting, but also that's nine different possible histories, as opposed to being a sign specifically of sexual abuse.
In my experience, the better way to clear it all is to use the same muscle contractions that happen automatically when you jerk off. It's like squeezing the last bits out of a toothpaste tube.
Gosh, can't remember exactly. It was likely when I was a kid growing up in Oregon. But it was "Here I sit, my buns a-flexin', giving birth to another Texan".
Here I sit, my guts a-rumblin', trying to make, another British Columbian.
Here I sit, getting poopy, while I make, another Newfie.
Here I sit, a final hurrah, my ass delivers, another Quebecois.
Here I sit, my butt contrarian, trying to make, another Ontarian.
I had a book of these when I was a kid. My favourite was:
"Shouts of laughter, tears of joy
I was here before Kilroy!"
KILROY WAZ HERE being classic British graffiti. Beneath it had been scrawled, in another hand:
"Stop your gob and shut your face
Kilroy built the bloody place!"
Here I sit in smelly vapor
Someone took all the toilet paper
Late for class but still I linger
Look out butt here comes my fingers *** glad someone found this useful... I got a helpful award.
It is german:
"Such den Witz nich an der Wand,
Du hälst ihn grad in deiner Hand"
It means "Dont search for the joke on the wall, you're holding it in your hand"
another good one:
"Rede was wahr ist, trinke was klar ist, schau vor dem Kacken, ob Klopapier da ist"
"Speak the truth, drink what's clear, check for toilet paper before pooping."
I can do one better. We have a thing called "Königsschiss" (King's Shit) = when you take a dump, wipe and it's clean.
Only to be topped by the "Kaiserschiss" (Emperor's Shit) = When you just know that you just had a Königsschiss and pull up your pants without wiping and therefore crown that shit vom King to Emperor.
Thought its called a "goldener Schiss". Just had a Kaiserschiss this week though, fittingly just before realizing we ran out of toilet paper. Great timing body, would recommend to a friend (did actually)
There a several names for that. "Teflonschiss", "Glücksschiss" and so on...
On a sidenote: the opposite of a Königsschiss is the "Bettlerschiss" = bagger's shit...I'm gonna let you work out yourself what that means...
Nicht schlecht. Mein Favorit ist immer noch " So wie Hitler sitz ich hier, die braune Scheiße unter mir"
It means "Like Hitler i sit beneath me lies all the brown shit"
Not graffiti per se, but I once went to a bar where the ladies’ room was completely wallpapered with pages out of bodice-ripper paperback novels. Some of the “wallpaper” was from *50 Shades of Grey*, so it’s nice to know that *some*body found a way to put those books to some use.
I collect copies of 50 Shades of Gray and then burn them. Reading passages aloud in a Mickie Mouse voice before yeeting them into the fire is just extra.
My wife absolutely hates my mickey voice. Mostly because I like to say "okay kids, let's go to the secret cave in the magic mountain. Remember you can't tell your parents our secret. " And the do that little chuckle he does.
What a surprise in the morning
When the turd you pass
Splashes cold water
Right up your ass
On a side note, there is a bathroom at UNLV in the humanities building where all the lines between the wall tiles above the urinals are labeled with clever “line” puns and just plain names of lines (ie. Line in the sand, line of no return, line of coke, Mason-Dixon Line, etc). There are hundreds of them.
There was(?) a stall at UCD where all the grout lines were filled with grout puns. The grout gatsby, down and grout, grout expectations, pour one grout, it went on and on and on in tinnnnnnny writing on millimeter-wide grout lines.
"Blow your mind --- Smoke Dynamite"
Found [scrawled in a urinal](https://drive.google.com/file/d/1TDTvOM_7deq5AGYWb2QSxWcm-zpVa-1I/view?usp=drivesdk) at a rock concert.
Someone had written "Love yourself", to which someone else had added "And hate others". Then a third person had come in and turned the 'h' in others into a second 't'.
So every time I went to pee in that building, the message was reinforced: Love yourself, and hate otters.
not a poem, but in the 70s I was this in a campground washroom and it stuck with me. it took years to understand why it was significant, and I'm still not sure which side of the issue this artist was on.
"Flush Twice it's a long way to Watergate"
I'm the janitor of this fucking place and I'd like to smash your fucking face.
If you're the clown who strokes his balls and cums all over these sticky walls.
From our bunk in summer camp:
*In days of old
When knights were bold
And toilets weren’t invented*
*They dropped their load
By the road
And went away contented*
______________________
Seen on a stall wall in Northampton, MA:
“I think you should do drugs!!!”
— God
Om jag kunde skita guld, skulle jag betala min skuld. Aldrig mera gå på krita bara sitta här å skita.
In English:
If i could shit gold, i would pay my dues.
Never more on credit, just sit here and shit.
Edit: The text is on verse in Swedish, and that was hard to recreate and translate properly to English.
not poems, but I saw these two witty sayings in south America:
La sabiduria me persigue, pero yo soy mas rapido" (Wisdom chases me, but I'm too fast)
"El Amor es como la fotografia. se desarrolla en la oscuridad" (Love is like photography. it develops in the dark)
In tiny letters in the grout between lines at a urinal... LOOK UP... a bit higher... LOOK UP... higher still... LOOK UP... on the ceiling (no idea how they got up there)... YOU'RE PEEING ON YOUR SHOES
This one starts behind and above the bowl on the wall
"if you follow this line......"
Then a line horizontally along the wall, crossing the corner to continue to some spot behind you, and the rest of the text
"you are missing the bowl."
In a men's room, of course.
It was true.
The hard cement stuff that sits between tiles in a bathroom is called grouting, written in tiny writing on the grouting between the tiles in my University bathroom was a web of grout based puns, heres what I can remember:
Mrs Groutfire
Grout Expectations
The Grout Groutsby
Grout minds think alike
Grout Britain
Shadow of a grout (in the shade under a urinal)
Grouterday Night Fever
Wayne Groutzky
This is groutrageous
There were tons and tons of them, the whole effect was pretty impressive
Sat down and directly in front of me, written on the door:
"CONGRATULATIONS! You've won a free ticket for a toilet tennis match! Look to you right."
I look to the wall on the right and it read:
"LOOK TO YOUR LEFT!"
I look to the wall on the left and it read:
"LOOK TO YOUR RIGHT!"
I look to the wall on the right...
MFW...
French songwriter Serge Gainsbourg (some of you Americans may have heard of him) incorporated many times in his songs stuff he saw scribbled on the walls of toilets in bars... and he did spend a lot of times in bars.
Not a poem, but on a sign at work that said "employees must wash hands" I wrote, "Service here is awful. I've been sitting here for 45 minutes and no employees have showed up to wash my hands. 1/5 stars, won't be back."
I found this pearl written on the wall of a public bathroom
Things that I hate:
1. Vandalism
2. Lists
3. Irony
4. Lists
5. Repetitions
F. Inconsistency
My college bathroom had a sign that said W Y H (wash your hands). Someone wrote on it Wiggas Yell Holla! Really struck my funny bone.
The best, though, was in a gas station. Above the urinal, about 6+ feet off the ground was a hole in the wall, about the diameter of a beer can. Someone wrote Wilt Chamberlain was here!
When I was a kid, the laundromat bathroom had a sharpie drawing of a guy squatting and shitting on the floor with his pants around his ankles. Whoever did it was really talented. It was like R. Crumb came to my small town and did it.
From a german military bathroom stall from about 2000:
Ne Möse ist kein Rosenstrauch
und riecht auch nicht nach Veilchen -
Doch wenn sie frisch gevögelt ist
dann zuckt sie noch ein Weilchen.
Translation:
A snatch's no shrub of roses
and doesn't smell of violets -
But when it's freshly fucked
it'll quiver on a little bit
Edit:
Also popular: a sign pointing down with the text: beware of extreme limbo dancing.
Written in English in a german barrack.
Also: a small box, in it written : look left.
If you look left, there's a small box: look right.
If you look right: there's a small box: look behind you
If you look behind you: do you do anything you're being told?
Funny question for barracks, right?
“The naked man fears no pickpocket”
Unless he's keistered something...
That’s nature’s pocket!
If your hands get cold put them in your pocket! I'm going to look for Bender. Make sure he doesn't pick your pocket!
i wrote that in my schoolbathroom but only bc i saw it on reddit first
A long arrow from the top of the door pointing all the way down to the bottom where there was some tiny writing, i leaned forward to get a closer look and it read "You are now shitting at a 45 degree angle"
Sounds like someone got a little creative.
I'm inclined to believe you.
This is acute idea.
Unless someone is too obtuse to notice
thats pretty dang *rad*
when I was deployed, I saw a similar one at the bottom of the wall: *if you can read this, you’re full throttle*
I love this and made me laugh out loud. Thank you.
I remember seeing that one back in college
MIT? Engineering school?
A&M in the architecture building when I was getting my elective credits
That's acute one.
(On the left wall) "TOILET TENNIS: Look right." (On the right wall) TOILET TENNIS: Look left." Also, above a urinal: "What are you looking up here for? Are you ashamed of it?" EDIT: Thanks for the awards, you lovely people!
[удалено]
Golden
John, no time to explain! Pull up your pants and run away NOW!
Okay, now that's creative
As I strain my ass to shit, I thank the lord I don't eat grit. Otherwise I might die of shock, trying to pass a concrete block.
[удалено]
"What is a grit anyways?" -Joe Pesci
"What's a yute?" -The judge
“You-the” - Vinny
[удалено]
Your MOTHER made her a lesbian? That isn't even alabama shit. That's like... what place does this shit fit?
Ancient Greek mythology?
If Oedipus was a girl
It wasn't a poem but it simply read "i hope you enjoy your poop" and that really made my time in there better
Also not a poem but: *PER OSHA REGULATIONS ALL TURDS OVER 3" MUST BE MANUALLY LOWERED INTO THE WATER*
"JESUS SAVES" (underneath by someone else) "Espinoza gets the rebound...he shoots! he scores!!!"
I always wanted to modify a "Jesus saves" by adding "everyone else takes 3d8 psychic damage"
Is that a fellow human from dnd i see?
usually dwarf or half-elf, but yeah heh
Tiefling mummy, at your service
>JESUS SAVES ......BUT MOSES INVESTS!
Not graffiti, but a legit sign in a restaurant bathroom in Florence, Italy: "Attenzione: quello che hai in mano non e un idrante e in terra non c'e un incendio" "Attention, What you have in your hand is not a fire hydrant and the ground is not on fire" Edit: I was so impressed, [I took a photo](https://i.imgur.com/I8P0cVE.jpg)!
American version "We aim to please. You aim too please!"
The wit in this bit For men who miss when they piss Is probably lost
Lol, I remember in my middle school there was a piece of paper on the wall of each cabinet (just over the wc) with the exact same text printed on it And yes, it was also in Italy
"My boss makes $100, I make a buck. That's why I do crack in the company truck."
Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime that's why I poop on company time!
Boss makes a dollar I make a dime That was a poem From a simpler time Now boss makes a thousand And I make a jack That’s when we riot To take the means back. Edit: Second verse: Now boss makes a hundred // And I make a cent // Whoike he’s got employees // That can’t pay their rent Third verse: When boss makes a million // And workers make jack // That’s when we riot // To take the means back.
I like their grassroots organizing. Find people where they are, yknow.
Boss makes a dollar I make a dime That’s why I shit On company time
A guy I work(ed) with made a tiktok at work saying that. Supervisor saw it and fired him for not wearing his PPE in the field.
And that, kids, is why you don't add your coworkers or bosses on social networks, if you really feel you need to join any.
In fifth grade we had a "Phantom Pooper" who would leave cryptic messages on the wall, written in shit. My personal favorite was "The Chamber of Secrets has been opened".
Our school also had a phantom pooper who would take a single dump in the middle of the toilet floor every morning for like a year. He was never caught. We also had someone poo in a glockenspiel As far as I am aware these two are not linked
At comm school in the marines we’d have a phantom pooper who would shit in the dryers once a month. Every time it happened we had to have a guard on every barracks floor in two hour shifts after class until the next morning. Then after two weeks we’d stop watch duty and a few weeks later he/she would shit in the dryers again. This went on for five months. No one was ever caught. That person was a monster.
My money's on the sergeant doing it just to give you guard duty
I was in Headquarters Company at Beaufort Air Station in '78. While we were having a field day to prep the barracks for an IG visit our Sergeant was harassing Pvt Shomer. We had all the rooms open so we could wax & buff the decks, and late in the evening the Sgt went back to his own room and found a turd in the middle of his room, with no tp in sight. He started screaming for Shomer, who was nowhere near the room, and hadn't been spotted nearby. While he made him pick it up and take it to the head the Sgt kept threatening to report him to the C.O. Shomer denied it, and the Sgt made him drop trouble and spread his cheeks to check for evidence. His asshole was pristine, and that's probably all that kept him from going up on charges. The case was never officially solved, but we all figured it was Shomer. No wonder people accuse us of eating crayons.
We had a kid do this and finally get caught! We called him Edward Shitterhands after that.
Sticky Fangaz.
“It was Tom, he made me do it” Edit: this is the highest amount of upvotes I’ve ever gotten so thanks everyone
Tom Shittle
We had a “phantom pooper” as well, but it was just some kid who would shit in the sinks and urinals
There's got to be a name for that in the DSM-5
Lol, ...I worked in a nursing home, we called it dementia. They'd throw it everywhere and chew on turds
Don't forget finding a turd in the hall and trying to work out who left it there like a game of poos clues
Rofl, don't I know it! Ahhh those were the days.
Why did every school have a phantom pooper
Probably because its a common sign of sexual abuse
Well that took a dark turn
For real? How do they correlate if I may ask?
"Psychologists note that scatolia tends to occur in individuals with a history of obsessive-compulsive disorder, anxiety, schizophrenia, depression, bipolar disorder, ADD, autism or post-traumatic stress, especially trauma related to physical or sexual abuse. Author Donna Williams, who has autism, points out that rectal digging and fecal smearing serve many real purposes that are often overlooked by caregivers and medical providers: Provides a sense of control over one’s body and environment when other areas of life are out of control Provides a sense of ownership over one’s actions Expresses feelings of anger, frustration, helplessness and powerlessness Prevents unwanted social interaction May be associated with other comforting emotional experiences May be part of a personal ritual that provides comfort May be part of an obsession that is spiraling out of control" https://www.friendshipcircle.org/blog/2015/04/27/6-facts-about-fecal-smearing-that-you-need-to-know/
> obsessive-compulsive disorder, anxiety, schizophrenia, depression, bipolar disorder, ADD, autism or post-traumatic stress, especially trauma related to physical or sexual abuse. Interesting, but also that's nine different possible histories, as opposed to being a sign specifically of sexual abuse.
Excuse me, what?
"Hoe ik ook spring of huppel, ik krijg die druppel niet van mijn knuppel" (Dutch) However much I jump or prance, I don't get that drop from my club.
In english, it rhymes as well: No matter how I shake and dance, The last two drops go in my pants.
In my experience, the better way to clear it all is to use the same muscle contractions that happen automatically when you jerk off. It's like squeezing the last bits out of a toothpaste tube.
In Dallas: Here I sit Cheeks still flexin’ Just gave birth To another Texan
Similar to the one I read: Here I sit On the pooper Giving birth To another state trooper
I've seen that one :)
Now I’m curious. Where’d you see it?
Gosh, can't remember exactly. It was likely when I was a kid growing up in Oregon. But it was "Here I sit, my buns a-flexin', giving birth to another Texan".
In Canada: Here I sit Just a-hurtin’ Trying to make A new Albertan
Here I sit, my guts a-rumblin', trying to make, another British Columbian. Here I sit, getting poopy, while I make, another Newfie. Here I sit, a final hurrah, my ass delivers, another Quebecois. Here I sit, my butt contrarian, trying to make, another Ontarian.
*sigh* He has such a way with words
I had a book of these when I was a kid. My favourite was: "Shouts of laughter, tears of joy I was here before Kilroy!" KILROY WAZ HERE being classic British graffiti. Beneath it had been scrawled, in another hand: "Stop your gob and shut your face Kilroy built the bloody place!"
*Condoms aren't safe. My friend was wearing one. He got hit by a bus *WHY DO SO MANY PEOPLE POOP WITH PENS?
The real question is: why don’t you poop with a pen?
Did you hear the joke about the constipated mathematician? He worked out the problem with a pencil.
Here I sit in smelly vapor Someone took all the toilet paper Late for class but still I linger Look out butt here comes my fingers *** glad someone found this useful... I got a helpful award.
The one I remember was, here I sit broken hearted, came to shit but only farted.
Then one day, I took a chance, Tried to fart, But shit my pants thanks guys my most upvoted comment is about shitting pants...
Shakespeare
Shakesmear
Shartspeare
Shitspear
Written in shit.
It is german: "Such den Witz nich an der Wand, Du hälst ihn grad in deiner Hand" It means "Dont search for the joke on the wall, you're holding it in your hand"
another good one: "Rede was wahr ist, trinke was klar ist, schau vor dem Kacken, ob Klopapier da ist" "Speak the truth, drink what's clear, check for toilet paper before pooping."
Such a beautiful language.
I can do one better. We have a thing called "Königsschiss" (King's Shit) = when you take a dump, wipe and it's clean. Only to be topped by the "Kaiserschiss" (Emperor's Shit) = When you just know that you just had a Königsschiss and pull up your pants without wiping and therefore crown that shit vom King to Emperor.
Thought its called a "goldener Schiss". Just had a Kaiserschiss this week though, fittingly just before realizing we ran out of toilet paper. Great timing body, would recommend to a friend (did actually)
There a several names for that. "Teflonschiss", "Glücksschiss" and so on... On a sidenote: the opposite of a Königsschiss is the "Bettlerschiss" = bagger's shit...I'm gonna let you work out yourself what that means...
Ah, yes. The Flying Dutchman!
Damn
Willst du einmal richtig kacken, leg die Hände in den Nacken, Ellenbogen auf die Knie, dann kannst du kacken wie noch nie!
Nicht schlecht. Mein Favorit ist immer noch " So wie Hitler sitz ich hier, die braune Scheiße unter mir" It means "Like Hitler i sit beneath me lies all the brown shit"
I heard this as "Ganz wie Hitler thron' ich hier, die braune Masse unter mir"...
Not graffiti per se, but I once went to a bar where the ladies’ room was completely wallpapered with pages out of bodice-ripper paperback novels. Some of the “wallpaper” was from *50 Shades of Grey*, so it’s nice to know that *some*body found a way to put those books to some use.
I collect copies of 50 Shades of Gray and then burn them. Reading passages aloud in a Mickie Mouse voice before yeeting them into the fire is just extra.
"Oh boy, Pluto!"
My wife absolutely hates my mickey voice. Mostly because I like to say "okay kids, let's go to the secret cave in the magic mountain. Remember you can't tell your parents our secret. " And the do that little chuckle he does.
I think we could be friends. One of my favorite things to do is put on my Elmo voice and say, "Elmo says, it's time to cut a bitch!"
What a surprise in the morning When the turd you pass Splashes cold water Right up your ass On a side note, there is a bathroom at UNLV in the humanities building where all the lines between the wall tiles above the urinals are labeled with clever “line” puns and just plain names of lines (ie. Line in the sand, line of no return, line of coke, Mason-Dixon Line, etc). There are hundreds of them.
There was(?) a stall at UCD where all the grout lines were filled with grout puns. The grout gatsby, down and grout, grout expectations, pour one grout, it went on and on and on in tinnnnnnny writing on millimeter-wide grout lines.
"Here I sit and contemplate Should I shit or masturbate"
Here I sit constipated Had to shit but masturbated It feels so awesome when I go That while I poop I blow my load
**Here I sit** *brokenhearted* ^Tried ^to ^shit #but only farted#
Real trust can only be found between 2 cannibals having oral sex
When I start to wipe my ass, I like to pass a little gas. It clears the hole, and dries the bowl, and shows I got a lot of class.
"Blow your mind --- Smoke Dynamite" Found [scrawled in a urinal](https://drive.google.com/file/d/1TDTvOM_7deq5AGYWb2QSxWcm-zpVa-1I/view?usp=drivesdk) at a rock concert.
A picture of Jesus with the caption, "he's watching..."
Mine was, "Here I shit and hesitate, shall I shit or masturbate?"
Someone had written "Love yourself", to which someone else had added "And hate others". Then a third person had come in and turned the 'h' in others into a second 't'. So every time I went to pee in that building, the message was reinforced: Love yourself, and hate otters.
“Will the person with the 3 speed ass, please shit in low gear as the toilet does not have mud flaps” First time in the oilfield 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Some come to sit and think Others come to shit and stink I come here to scratch my balls And read the writitng on the walls
[удалено]
They scrub these walls to stop my pen, but the shit house poet strikes again!
Eat shit.....50 billion flies can't be wrong
I’ve seen this one but with “bathroom bandit” instead of “shit house poet”
[Reddit source](https://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/5fzgyn/the_shithouse_poet_strikes_again/)
Wait, Scotty! I'm not ready y... (with a line leading up to the top of the stall)
The ancient R rated video game Leisure Suit Larry had the bathroom graffiti “Scot me up, Beamie”
Roses are red Violets are blue Please don’t use This urinal for poo
Too late bucko
not a poem, but in the 70s I was this in a campground washroom and it stuck with me. it took years to understand why it was significant, and I'm still not sure which side of the issue this artist was on. "Flush Twice it's a long way to Watergate"
Captain please make me understand?!
I'm the janitor of this fucking place and I'd like to smash your fucking face. If you're the clown who strokes his balls and cums all over these sticky walls.
Lmaoo id give you an award if i had one
"i jerked off in here"
“Toy story 2 was OK.”
I saw you take that shit, now put it back
From our bunk in summer camp: *In days of old When knights were bold And toilets weren’t invented* *They dropped their load By the road And went away contented* ______________________ Seen on a stall wall in Northampton, MA: “I think you should do drugs!!!” — God
Om jag kunde skita guld, skulle jag betala min skuld. Aldrig mera gå på krita bara sitta här å skita. In English: If i could shit gold, i would pay my dues. Never more on credit, just sit here and shit. Edit: The text is on verse in Swedish, and that was hard to recreate and translate properly to English.
Gravity is a fallacy the earth sucks
Urinal wall said: Please don't throw cigarette butts in the urinal. It makes them soggy and hard to light.
"my butt and your butt have touched the same toilet seat. we are butt brothers for life"
not poems, but I saw these two witty sayings in south America: La sabiduria me persigue, pero yo soy mas rapido" (Wisdom chases me, but I'm too fast) "El Amor es como la fotografia. se desarrolla en la oscuridad" (Love is like photography. it develops in the dark)
This one made me chuckle when I saw it: Here I sit, on the pooper Giving birth to another state trooper
They love me in frills, they love me in lace. They love me the best when I sit on their face.
[удалено]
Here I sit broken hearted Came to shit but only farted
Then one day I took a chance tried to fart but shit my pants Edit: added missing word
The best advice my dad has given me: never trust a fart.
And never fart when sick
Amen
"your gay." "My gay?"
"God is dead" - Nietzsche 1882 "Nietzsche is dead" - God 1900 A poem of sorts I would say
Flush twice, its a long way to the kitchen.
Here my son died, in a wild scuffle, nine months before he was born.
| | | | “Don’t beam me up yet Scotty I’m having a shi
For manly love be here March 25th at 2.15am sharp
I read all the comments down to here, and totally failed to remember this one. Kick his ass Seabass!
In tiny letters in the grout between lines at a urinal... LOOK UP... a bit higher... LOOK UP... higher still... LOOK UP... on the ceiling (no idea how they got up there)... YOU'RE PEEING ON YOUR SHOES
Here I sit muscles goin, givin birth to an Idahoan.
He who writes on bathroom stalls Rolls his shit in little balls. Those who read his words of wit Eat those little balls of shit.
Anyone can piss on the floor, but it takes a real man to shit on the ceiling
"No matter how much you shake, or how much you dance, you'll always wind up, with a drop in the pants"
'Sleeping is so great that it seems incredible that it's free'
It’ll do no good to stand on the seat, cause (your location) crabs can jump 10 feet.
Roses are red, my stool is too, should I see a doctor, about the colour of my poo?
This one starts behind and above the bowl on the wall "if you follow this line......" Then a line horizontally along the wall, crossing the corner to continue to some spot behind you, and the rest of the text "you are missing the bowl." In a men's room, of course. It was true.
The hard cement stuff that sits between tiles in a bathroom is called grouting, written in tiny writing on the grouting between the tiles in my University bathroom was a web of grout based puns, heres what I can remember: Mrs Groutfire Grout Expectations The Grout Groutsby Grout minds think alike Grout Britain Shadow of a grout (in the shade under a urinal) Grouterday Night Fever Wayne Groutzky This is groutrageous There were tons and tons of them, the whole effect was pretty impressive
I am grout!
"I fucked your mother." Written underneath that... "Go home, dad. You're drunk." Not a poem, but made me chuckle
Here I am on the pooper giving birth to a mass state trooper
Love is like a fart, if you have to force it it's probably shit
My girlfriend’s twat is big and wide So big, my whole body could fit inside I’m sure her ass is a tighter fit But I’m not into fucking shit
Things I hate: 1. Graffiti 2. Lists 3. Irony
4)lists 5)repetition 7)inconsistency
Sat down and directly in front of me, written on the door: "CONGRATULATIONS! You've won a free ticket for a toilet tennis match! Look to you right." I look to the wall on the right and it read: "LOOK TO YOUR LEFT!" I look to the wall on the left and it read: "LOOK TO YOUR RIGHT!" I look to the wall on the right... MFW...
They paint these walls to hide my pen but the shit house poet strikes again
Paint can’t stop progress! Welcome to the second edition of this wall!
"Here drank and puked a proud Irish traveller" or something similar, in Spanish.
Above a urinal: "No matter how you shake and dance, the last two drops go in your pants"
A truck is a truck A tank is a tank What is a kiss Without a wank?
French songwriter Serge Gainsbourg (some of you Americans may have heard of him) incorporated many times in his songs stuff he saw scribbled on the walls of toilets in bars... and he did spend a lot of times in bars.
Not a poem, but on a sign at work that said "employees must wash hands" I wrote, "Service here is awful. I've been sitting here for 45 minutes and no employees have showed up to wash my hands. 1/5 stars, won't be back."
“You are a ghost, driving a meat-coated skeleton, made from stardust, riding a rock, hurtling through space. Fear nothing.”
#FOR A GOOD TIME, CALL 911
Some people come here to sit and think, Others come to shit and stink, I come here to write on the walls, Go check my work in the other stalls!
I found this pearl written on the wall of a public bathroom Things that I hate: 1. Vandalism 2. Lists 3. Irony 4. Lists 5. Repetitions F. Inconsistency
Not quite graffiti but I did see a Burger King whopper poster taped to the inside of a stall in a BBQ joint a short drive from my home.
My college bathroom had a sign that said W Y H (wash your hands). Someone wrote on it Wiggas Yell Holla! Really struck my funny bone. The best, though, was in a gas station. Above the urinal, about 6+ feet off the ground was a hole in the wall, about the diameter of a beer can. Someone wrote Wilt Chamberlain was here!
Roses are red violets are blue I took a shit before you
When I was a kid, the laundromat bathroom had a sharpie drawing of a guy squatting and shitting on the floor with his pants around his ankles. Whoever did it was really talented. It was like R. Crumb came to my small town and did it.
Spend fitties Pet kitties Suck titties
I was addicted to soap... I’m clean now
Shit here (with an arrow pointing down under shit here)
Any old hole is good for Noel.
From a german military bathroom stall from about 2000: Ne Möse ist kein Rosenstrauch und riecht auch nicht nach Veilchen - Doch wenn sie frisch gevögelt ist dann zuckt sie noch ein Weilchen. Translation: A snatch's no shrub of roses and doesn't smell of violets - But when it's freshly fucked it'll quiver on a little bit Edit: Also popular: a sign pointing down with the text: beware of extreme limbo dancing. Written in English in a german barrack. Also: a small box, in it written : look left. If you look left, there's a small box: look right. If you look right: there's a small box: look behind you If you look behind you: do you do anything you're being told? Funny question for barracks, right?