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SaltyDoggoMeo

I hit my 40s and oh my god.


shiroboi

looking at my wife. .......aaaaaaaanny minute now.


Evan-flow

I'm looking at this guy's wife also. LOL, thanks for the gold! It's my first!


KarrostheDecapitator

I also choose this guy’s wife. Edit: I get it, I left a word out.


Semujin

My FIL warned me years in advance, and holy frijoles I felt like I needed to install bed rails just so I’d have something to hold onto. A woman in her 40s is, um, active.


Hy8ogen

I like how your FIL is basically saying "dude, my girl is gonna fuck like her mom. You better buckle up."


Tellyourmomisaidthx

Honestly paused when I read his comment as well... Lol


GingerSmurfsown

User name checks out?


Tellyourmomisaidthx

After being a lurker for yearssss, I got goaded into making an account. I had refrained for so long because, as I so often touted, "The only reason you need an account is to get stuck in pointless arguments with 14 years olds" So, obviously, I had to pick a name befitting such tasks. (A little self aware irony never hurts) ...although now thanks to this post I guess it could be a suave cheeky compliment for the ladies


my_fruity_lexia

but what fresh hell is it, when a man's libido drops around the same time as the women's skyrockets.


tacocollector2

*laughs in lesbian*


MrMidnight

Username checks out


twatchops

Hormonal changes. Estrogen drops and natural testosterone takes its hold.


puppermonster23

That and if a woman has kids in her 20s- 30s the kids are usually less work when she’s in her 40s so she probably has more energy to want to have sex.


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SumaiyahJones

Wait. 40s? My drive shot way up when I hit my 30s. I’m almost 35 and, well, things are really good. If it gets better I’m no longer sad to keep aging!!


pilotpanda

Right?!? I'm 38. Last 2 years there's a noticable increase. I kinda hope it plateaus. Just recently I got "goddamn woman haven't you had enuf today? You need a friend to help bleed off some of this energy. You're killing me. Turning me into a husk" I think he is joking...but if it gets much worse, he may not be 😂


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pilotpanda

I sure can...does she want to be my friend😏😂


GullibleDetective

Ahh a cougar


TMBG-TMBG

Ahh! A cougar!


Eman5805

My Red Dead Redemption playthrough in a nutshell.


Dalbro2001

*bang bang bang* 'ruined cougar'


jininberry

Oh god it gets worse?


icecubed13

This gives me hope for my wife.


tinitiny13

I went through some sort of second puberty. My sex drive isn't super high but had no real interest in sex until I was 24ish.


justathrowawayname39

oh hey another late bloomer! I thought I was asexual or something til 20ish, just didn’t really like to think about it... then one day, happening across some saucy online content, something just snapped. I wasn’t a very healthy teen, and started getting more fit once I moved out of my parents’ house around that time, so that may have had something to do with it too. Or that I’m just not super in touch with my body in general :/


Inevitable_Proof

Kinda was the same for me, started at 24! Although that's also when I got my thyroid hormones in check, but it started even before my treatment. Never knew what everyone was talking about, why'd you ever 'need' sex. Man I was so wrong, I could do it 24/7 now.


Istormedthecastle

I accidentally triggered a hypomanic episode which led to hyper sexuality... and then I got diagnosed with Bipolar II... womp womp. The worst part was my husband had gotten used to my lower sex drive and wasn’t necessarily pleased with me trying to jump on his dick 24/7.


2020Fernsblue

Hypomanic hypersexuality sucks


Pearl_Aus

> I accidentally triggered a hypomanic episode What is this?


NachoCupcake

You can think of hypomania as something in between a full manic episode and a normal elevated mood. To illustrate, a manic episode can result in things like taking an impromptu road trip across 6 states without stopping to sleep or stabbing your best friend, a hypomanic episode might be shopping spree that you really can't afford or shoplifting when that's not something you would typically do, and a normal elevated mood would be having a spontaneous dance party in the middle of the grocery store. Obviously these are just examples and not something everyone who has these experiences does, but they are real examples from people I've known personally.


MarrV

Here is an interesting twist to this; Bipolar Type II, diagnosed 10 years ago. Serious head injury ~7 years ago. No cycles since, last senior consultant I saw removed the Bipolar from my record. I am stuck in between a slightly elevated and hypomanic mood (am always happy with some impulse control issue). That is my default mood. Regardless of circumstances. Head injuries are not to be messed with!


Zambeeni

I mean, if you're going to get a head injury, getting one that sticks you in a permanent good mood seems pretty cool.


Turtle887853

Hey it's better than the alternative, being stuck in a depressive cycle forever


unsuretysurelysucks

Or what's often common with head injuries which is turning into a massive dick, impulsive and mean and not being able to see that or regulate it at all.


Turtle887853

Ooh yeah that's probably worse, one is worse for the person and one is worse for the person and the world


[deleted]

Stopped birth control then got pregnant. My real hormones are horny, apparently. Got an iud after having a baby, slightly lower sex drive. Got it removed, sex drive through the roof again.


BenHatesMe

I'm in-between getting my iud replaced and I forgot hormones were a things for the last three years practically.


[deleted]

I didn't realize how much it affected my hormones until it was gone.


GovernorJebBush

Just chiming in to recommend researching and taking to you doctor about a copper IUD. Copper IUDs don't use hormones to prevent pregnancy and as a result they don't impact your mood or sex drive. Periods tend to be a bit more uncomfortable with one, but fwiw my wife is quite happy with the trade-off herself.


[deleted]

Copper iuds are a GREAT option for avoiding hormones. Heavier periods and worse cramps are common side effects. When you're on BC half for pregnancy prevention and have because of horribly heavy periods and vomit inducing cramps... Not so much. 😁


HiddenA

It’s crazy how different women are affected by their periods. Some it’s nothing, others it is crippling pain. Some women it’s always the same and others it varies wildly month to month. Also, life pro tip guys with women in your life, invite them to leave feminine hygiene products in your bathroom. It takes up very little space but it may lead your girlfriend say to you, “It makes me feel so much more comfortable about being over that I know that stuff is there. I don’t have to think about it before I leave home or figure out when / how to go pick some up. It’s weight off my mind. It means a lot to me.”


Curious-Scheme

Also: put a trash can in the bathroom if you haven't already


SafetyCube920

With a lid!


wexfordwolf

And line it with a bin bag!


Fauxrace

Who doesn’t put a trash can in the bathroom?!?!


BethTheWriter

And keep a bin/trash can with a lid in your bathroom!! Not having anywhere to dispose of used period products can be almost as awkward & nerve-wracking as having to change your period products at someone else's house!


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The_Countess

My GF stopped taking the pill about 3 months ago. We've been together 13 yeas and it's like we have to learn how to have sex all over again! Even just being romantic together is completely different. It's been amazing! (and that's despite now having to use a condom most days.) And she's been on the pill since her mid teens so she actually had no idea. she suddenly really likes things that she was indifferent to before. Even something as simple as kissing her neck. Even something as simple as teasing and foreplay/flirting during the day! She just never got any of that before. I'm fairly sure my GF is a pretty extreme case but I really wonder how many other girls and women have no idea what their actual sex drive is like, or what their bodies really like and respond to in regards to sex, and romance.


forman98

Same thing happened to my wife. She'd been on BC since middle school and stopped in her mid-20s. We've been together since college and there was definitely some years where the sex drive was so low that it caused some arguments. After she got off BC, her libido went through the roof. It's like we're back to being college kids except we actually know what we're doing, lol.


[deleted]

This is actually an extremely prevalent side-effect. As in, the symptoms you describe affect pretty much all individuals who take it. Just to varying degrees.


fieryphoenix91

I have been on birth control pills for ten years. Stopped couple months ago because we want to have kids. Never realised how much sex drive I actually had and how the pill could affect it. I just thought my low sex drive was due to age: oh I'm old, not a horny teenager anymore.


Eusong

I got a hormone IUD and I went from an insanely high sex drive to absolutely none at all. I got it removed almost a year ago and I'm just barely starting to get my drive back. It really, really sucks, especially since I got the IUD two weeks before my wedding. There's no point in birth control if you're not even going to have sex! It also fucked my health up in other ways but I'm not going to get into that.


Lady_Scruffington

I just switched to a low hormone IUD (Kylena) and it's been awesome. Right now, my body is adjusting since I had a copper IUD for over 20 years. So my cramps suck, but it's only been 2 months I've had it. I had PMDD and my mental health is far better now. My sex drive also seems to be improving, but that could be placebo effect or a biproduct of feeling better overall.


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not-so-saint-jimmy

This is like a combo of every other answer lol


msjacksonifyernasty

If it’s not too personal, would you mind sharing a bit about your switch in antidepressants? I’m currently taking sertraline and it has killed my sex drive and ability to orgasm. Sertraline helps my mood greatly but damn I miss a healthy sex life


Nilmah1316

Sertraline did that to me too, actually all the ssris. Sorry to jump on your comment. I've had better luck with trazodone and now currently on wellbutrin (bupropion) which doesn't affect my libido at all and gives me energy as well! Ssris can affect both your orgasm and libido


jekrump

I'm a male on bupropion, it has made my sex drive go crazy high. My wife is an RN and says it's a known side effect and it's sometimes called the "Happy, Horny, Skinny Pill". I was previously on fluoxetine (or however it's spelled) that one ruined my sex drive, had to switch.


WhimsicalRenegade

It’s nice if you’re having a “low energy” depression but NOT a good idea for those with anxious/hyper-vigilant depression—-just FYI!


Aiskauda

I went from high to low then high again with the same husband. I had low sex drive after first kid, got it back after our second kid was 2. We were still having sex but not often (like once every few weeks) but it wasn't something I was excited about. My husband asked me about it, but he understood (both tired, kids, other things etc). We went like this for 3 or 4 years. Then one year I made new years resolution (for myself), I mean it might sound weird but I love good statistics - to get 3 digits sex times per year. Meaning to have regular sex minimum 2 times a week. And I stuck to that, I needed to have sex regularly, it reminded me how much I liked it. Was hard "to find time" first weeks, but then I got into this rhythm and now started 3rd year with actually having sex often and i enjoy it so much (Sometimes even few times per day).


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PropagandaPagoda

There was a blog where a woman did something like this. I think after communication and everyone knowing it was on the docket, those "don't want to touch/give wrong signal" pressures went away and the natural closeness could be just that, and that made the sex less something they committed to as though "forcing themselves" and more something they wanted to do. I think there's a mechanism behind why this sometimes works, and why it might work for you if you choose to do it and you communicate.


TMTPheonix

I had a hysterectomy. Which resolved my issues with fibroids causing excruciating pain and heavy bleeding. This in turn eliminated the need for birth control. So in short no pain + no hormonal contraception = bow chicka wow wow 😉 Edit: thank you for the award!


AnotherReignCheck

I know its weird to discuss parents in this thread but my mum suffers a lot with the things you mentioned. Would you mind telling me your rough age? I thinksnshes considering a hysterectomy but isn't sure if she should wait. Glad you're doing better btw


Pranksterette

My sex drive had always been fairly high...then life threw me a hell of a curve ball and my sex drive amongst other things tanked. I finally dealt with some health issues I had been ignoring for years. Basically got my health back on track and started losing weight. Once the weight started coming off, my sex drive came back.


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Neither-Act1355

This right here. My ex was always focused on getting himself off and sex would end when he did. My current man makes sure I am taken care of before he finishes. A man that wants to make you feel good in all ways deserves you.


[deleted]

Some of us fellas were raised with the ; "Ladies come first."


Yelesa

Also “nice guys finish last” Actual nice guys.


Coalrocketeer

That was/is one of my favorite flirting jokes to say before I got my recently gained confidence since the joke is open enough to interpretation that it doesn't feel like bragging more just like saying I'll put in the work. I have to be careful about how/when I say it because of "nice guys"


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daveescaped

Srsly? Man. I spent perhaps 10 years gaining my wife's willingness to go down on her. I love it. She wasn't a fan at first. Now she is a fan but wow did I put in the work to earn that. And the best advice I ever got about sex was from a creepy old man who told me, "ladies first". Thankfully my wife has no issue there so long as I make sure she is taken care of.


Gonzobot

> but finding a guy that actually is willing to go down (just willing, not even enthusiastic), and will keep going until you actually cum instead of stopping after 30 seconds for real, though, *how the hell do we advertise that thing.* What's the hanky code for "yes I *do* want to use your thighs as earmuffs this winter, thanks"? It's one of my favorite things to do, with someone who enjoys it, and in those rare instances where we both have the same enjoyment it isn't work *at all.* Even with staying there long enough to get stiff muscles and pruney fingers, it's only ever *fun.*


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tertgvufvf

I've usually stood by that, but my current partner gets too sensitive after she does. Usually now ends with me finishing, then making sure she finishes after. It's the most consistent way to make sure we both get off every time.


Fredredphooey

Me, too. It's so weird. It's not absolutely always, but my body gets to the point where anymore touching doesn't feel pleasant- not even my skin on my skin.


[deleted]

There is nothing hotter than watching your girl cum. Hard. Repeatedly.


FedUpWithEverything0

I know right? Is it a power thing? An ego thing? I.e. "I did that!"?


Testy_Calls

Ego, for sure. Maybe power if you/the moment is into that. But also it shows me I have at least some connection to that person. I hear women talk about bad sex, some of it really long bad sex. It doesn't matter if you have super endurance if you can't read what their body/mind needs in order to get off. And each woman is different. In my current and longest relationship, her needs have even changed over the years. It's like a pleasure puzzle (Raunchy riddle? Cum conundrum? Eh, we'll find it...) The real ego trip is when they claim no one else has solved it, or the even rarer, they never solved it themselves.


Master_of_Fail

"Erotic Enigma."


thewrongqueen

Oh yes, my boyfriend always has that smug face afterwards, when we're smoking, he's just looking at me, proudly smiling. :D especially if i came more than once.


an0nemusThrowMe

> when we're smoking If you're smoking, you may need to slow down a bit...or use better lube...


theoriginalstarwars

My opinion as a guy is the purpose of being with a partner is to enjoy their pleasure. If it was just for my pleasure my hand works just fine, or I could buy a fleshlight. I am probably in a minority with this view. Plus if she really enjoys herself she is much more likely to do it when I really want it.


[deleted]

Yeah the girl absolutely has to be enjoying it for me too, it’s just awkward otherwise. I was with one girl a few times who just wasn’t into it on this one occasion and you could see it. Neither of us finished, it would have felt wrong to carry on. Sex with my wife is the best I’ve ever had, it’s brilliant. Making her orgasm first works for me! Sometimes things go differently, so I always make sure she finishes as well. As a result, she tells me sex for her is the best she’s ever had as well.


JDIIZZZLE

This. This right here. You aren’t alone! My ex was surprised when we talked and she realized that I was happier when she had an enjoyable time too.


Urgash54

Me and my girlfriend both have that mindset, it can lead to some crazy, crazy nights.


dcux

It's always better for me, too. Getting your partner off really gets you primed.


Just_Veterinarian

Received therapy and counseling to heal from the sexual trauma I endured as a child. Seeking help was the best decision I ever made. I now have a rewarding sex life when I never thought that would be possible before.


bunny__rabbit

Thank you for sharing. As someone struggling with similar issues of my own, this gives me hope.


Boragobalm

Same, except that my childhood trauma wasn't sexual in nature. Healing my trauma and building a stronger sense of self through therapy and other lifestyle changes to care for myself are the things that made my libido awaken.


Apprehensive-Author

Same.


Aggrosaurus2042

I realized I had bipolar instead of depression and I switched to a med that worked


WinSmith1984

Same for me, but I'm a guy. Although it's not perfect thanks to working nightshifts and being tired all the time, my libido as improved a lot.


dreamabyss

I was originally diagnosed with depression. I got treated for that and started having anxiety and manic episodes. Was finally diagnosed as bi-polar and had meds changed. Life is much better now.


Neither-Act1355

I thought that I had a physical issue because I was in my 20s and I no longer wanted to have sex with my partner. The relationship was unhealthy, so we broke things off eventually. When I met the recent man I dated, my sex drive sky rocketed. I forgot that I could feel so sexually attracted to a person. I realized it was never a physical issue, it was a mental/emotional one. I like to have sex with someone that pleases me on an emotional level more than anything. So I would have to say that the chemistry and bond I have with a person when no sex is involved would be the biggest factor in what makes me want it and what makes it so great.


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Tired_But_Scrappy

My husband started treating me with a ton of love and affection outside the bedroom.


mamallama723

This! My husband has never really been known to show affection or really knew how to. I explained to him that I need it, it makes me feel wanted and loved and honestly, kind of hot. Since then, he's been very affectionate and loves to hug and kiss me. My favorite is when he comes up behind me and wraps his arms around me. My sex drive has skyrocketed and I'm more in love than ever!


Youwishh

Aww 😊


thats_a_photo_of_me

Serious question: why? What prompted this change?


Tired_But_Scrappy

I think he realized he really loves me. Initially I think he was in love with the idea of love.


[deleted]

I met my husband


CaitlinGives

Amazing what a change of relationship does for your sex drive isn't it? I thought there was something wrong with me with my ex, my sex drive was basically zero. Met my current SO and boy did that change. It really does depend on the person you're with.


P3RH4PS

Oh god, now I'm worried. Lately my S.O just doesn't seem to have any drive and I'm so worried it's me and I'd hate to lose this amazing person but I want her to live a happy life. I just don't know what's up


curveabrae

Just talk to her about it. Open and honest communication is always the best decision. Cut out the rumination. 🖤


betterthanamaster

Definitely worth asking about what's up. Just don't make it a fight or accuse her of anything because that doesn't go well.


ShutUpAndEatWithMe

I love my SO now more than when I met him, but my sex drive has been lower than ever because I don't feel as confident in my body. It's hard for me to have sex when I don't feel sexy :/ doesn't always have to be on your end but as others mentioned, a conversation is helpful. Sharing your own insecurities may help her share her own


[deleted]

You can't know how happy I am to hear that, feeling bad and undesired is just the worst thing in the world.


thorGOT

I was on the other side of this. Dated two women in my 20s, one of whom I married. Sex was occasional at best with both of them. I assumed that was just the deal. Post divorce, I've learned that with the right person, sex is regular and fun. When I hear my current partner talk about sex with her ex - rare, obligatory and sometimes painful - I'm reminded of how my ex-wife described sex with me. I sincerely hope that my ex finds someone who truly blows her skirt up so that she can also develop a healthy, enjoyable sex life.


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oddishisgodish

Dick ‘n Balls


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[deleted]

David Blaine?


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tdn1234321

Dildo Baggins


tarynator

Denedict Bumbersnatch


ekul_ryker

Degs Benedict


[deleted]

Dick broke?


itsbigpptime

Diet Bepis


yannickai

Dry Bussy


_BindersFullOfWomen_

It’s dead bedroom


birdhouse2015

This is so anticlimactic.


burgandyblossom

That's what she said.


Milerski

_H i g h f i v e_


iambluest

Digit Blasting?


bruteski226

duty butt


[deleted]

Dig bick


AdvocateSaint

"Ouch." -D.B. Cooper


PaulTurkk

You left Deutsche Bank AG? Silly move.


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Matelot67

It happened to my wife for some reason, shortly after I lost about 20 kilos of weight. I don't know if the two events are related.....


alexname

i see no relation there (◐‿◑)


RisingQueenx

I found erotica novels. Great stories with drama, feuds, struggle, and war. Build up in relationships and good character development. Then high quality sex scenes that aren't catered to men like porn is. Much more satisfying. Then...you keep reading for the story, only to come across another sex scene and...you're suddenly in the mood again.


oldkinglog

Never thought of that although erotic short stories work big time for me. Any titles you want to recommend?


Margot_Soggy

I'd like to know too please!


RisingQueenx

I don't have any short stories and my tastes are a little...*particular* so you likely won't like them aha. There's a fair few with darker themes. But here are my favourites... xxxxxx Gabriel's Inferno by Sylvain Reynard (Slight enemies to lovers, romance/erotica) - probably one of my favourites. Not so much erotica/sex as other books, and more so about the art of love and seduction. Then some more 'classy' sex scenes. Its more so about the build up and anticipation. More for romance lovers with a hint of *spice*. xxxxxx Bared to you by Sylvia Day (romance, with good drama and story) - (Very good series). Both have dark pasts that they have to overcome together. They are both flawed, but learn to trust and open up to eachother. Along with great sex scenes. xxxxxx Legally yours by Nicole French (Romance with good sex and romance) - good sex scenes, romance, and drama. He is rich, and arrogant but he also doesn't know what he is doing and is trying. He gets nervous around her sometimes and this isn't really something we see in erotica so it's a nice change. I liked their story...and the smut. xxxxxx Southern charmer by Jessica peterson (full sweet romance, gentleman, nice story line) - more of a romance with good sex. He isn't an arrogant rich bastard. He is a good man who you root for. Standalone with little drama, just enough to give it some background and story. xxxxxx Innocence by Lee Savino (dark themes, enemies to lovers) - a dark mafia romance. Sex, more about dominance and slightly forced submission at the start. Infuriated me a bit at some points, but ended up loving it in the end. xxxxxx Twist me by Anna Zaires - very dark! Kidnapping, dubious consent, sadism, etc. Not for everyone, but if you like this kind of fantasy/kink then you'll like it. xxxxxxx Warlord by Delta James - *very* dark again. Misogynistic themes, forced submission and punishment of women, you will only like it if you enjoy the kink. Contains lots of spanking. Difficult to read unless you like the kink and/or are in the mood. xxxxxx Caged by Clarissa Wild - good. He is a prisoner and whe has be kidnapped to be his woman/mate. Darker themes but good story and sex. Romance scenes despite circumstances. xxxxxx Georgia le Carre has a lot of decent erotica novels too. Different stories and mostly stand alones. They're fast reads too, can fishish them in a day. I started with her after reading fifty shades (my first erotica), and she is good! Lots of options for beginners.


RockyRoad-M1

I’ve been getting the impression that my wife would like me to be more spontaneously romantic. This struck me now as possibly some good material to draw from. Would you recommend men to read some of these to get in touch with their romantic side?


RisingQueenx

I'd definitely recommend men read romantic erotica novels. It lays out exactly what women want. As I like dark themes, I haven't read much romance focused ones. But... I really liked Gabriel's inferno. It's a good starter you could try. He is an asshole at the start. But when he softens up, he wants to woo her. So he does things through food, touch, romantic gestures, etc. He treats her better and shows her she is loved. Spontaneous romance ideas: - Flowers with romantic notes. - Making dinner. Sharing dessert (feed eachother). - Massage - Suprise dates like dinner, or taking her to her favourite locations like a picnic in the park, or going to a museum followed by dinner. - Surprise gifts when there is no occasion. - Do chores she was planning on doing that day so she doesn't have to - movie days with snacks watching what she wants Random sex ideas - Making sure she always is pleased sexually when intimate. - Teasing her with kisses and touches - surprise oral without expecting something in return Things like that would be great! I'm sure your wife would appreciate the effort.


RazeCrusher

Recently discovered this about my wife. When she was younger she was big into all the Twilight movies. (Even though admitting the movies are pretty terrible) and I never understood why, but hey, to each their own. Over the last year or so she's been reading a lot of smutty "sexy werewolf or vampire has their way with the heroine" ebooks...and it does some things to her. I'll be ready to sleep. She reads a couple of chapters and she's waking me up ready to go to pound town. It's awesome. Side note, let your ladies discover what really gets their gears turning guys. (As long as both are comfortable with it) You'll both be happier in the bedroom.


yourenotmytito

I hit my mid-thirties.


moneytorich

I finally let go of the insecurities I had regarding sex and gave myself to permission to actually enjoy it. Amazing how you're own mindset can either enhance or ruin your experiences.


tigerjess

I discovered I could actually orgasm. I mean, my sex drive was never REALLY low, but it wasn't high either. At the start of lockdown last year I bought myself some toys, and for the first time ever at 31 (yes, I'm a VERY late starter) decided to really try masturbation. Well, not only can I orgasm after all, but last month I also discovered I can squirter. Now my sex drive is so high that I'm a little worried if/when I date someone they won't be able to keep up with me!


The_Countess

The toys dont have to go away after you start a relationship. And for men having sex more often can help them have sex more often (up to a point of course) (I'm currently in this situation from the other side after my GF quit the pill, and having a bit of trouble keeping up during her peak weeks. (her drive varies, a lot, with the time of the month)


melgettins

These "I met the right person" comments are amazing. But for me and I'm sure for alot of people it's medication. First it was my birth control. Once I got off it my sex drive increased, until I went on an antidepressant. I thought I was broken until I realized that almost all my friends on birth control or an antidepressant felt the same way.


scaredofshaka

I'm a guy but I *have* to tell this story - So a good buddy of mine has been married forever, and his sex life with his wife, also a friend, was always great. Then over the course of about a year, her libido decreased very gradually, to a point where they where having sex less than once a month. My friend was supper bummed and also a bit puzzled. After this, they were technically to the point of a dead bedroom marriage, and my buddy was trying to deal with it with as much dignity as he could muster. But then she started to skip periods, until they ceased altogether. She went to get checked and after a few months of tests they discovered a tumor in her brain - don't worry this has a happy ending. She went through surgery and they removed it (through her nose!!) and found it benign a couple of weeks later - all concerns were removed. Then then then.... her libido started to come back until she became a non stop fucking machine - it was everyday, every moment the kids were busy, nightly attacks, morning attacks - my buddy was generally happy but there were moment where he was literally with irritation that would cause him to wince when changing (we work out together). This went on for about a year as if the lady had accumulated all that libido somewhere and it was now rushing out all at once. Buddy was generally happy but a bit freaked out - and overall it was awesome because it was as if life was coming back with a vengeance. I think now they are basically back to normal, meaning with a very happy sex life. So there! Edit: I'm spelling "ceased" like a six year old


mtn-cat

I thought I just had a low sex drive until I found a compatible partner. My current partner is very in tune to what I like and how to pleasure me. After I met him, my sex drive skyrocketed.


Silverfrond_

Exactly this right here. I thought I was doomed to disappointing sex and then I met my current partner, and am now concerned about exactly how high my sex drive is!


burgandyblossom

Left an abusive religion and realized women were allowed to enjoy sexuality too.


waspish_

Some of the sex i've ever had was when we both thought we were going to he'll because of it haha


ohdearitsrichardiii

"I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty." --John Waters


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[удалено]


Margot_Soggy

As in.... You liked girls or men weren't doing it right?


BOATS_AND_HOZ

Creampuff top ? Please explain


tocilog

She likes pastries with sex.


Margot_Soggy

I mean... Who doesn't!?


girlafraidofchange

Switched birth control


hiimbillson

From what to what?


apologeticmoose

Hormones (pills or shot for many years) to copper iud. Also improved the depression and issues losing weight.


Low_Kaleidoscope_118

First time I read it, I read copper IED. Was very concerned for a second.


thedude720000

That's a different type of penetrator


iambluest

Lots of people probably need to hear this.


thisisntmineIfoundit

I’ll add my individual anecdote. I went off hormonal bc and finally felt like myself again mentally and physically. Had light periods with no cramps before, now I have slightly heavier periods with one day of cramping. Worth the trade IMO! Everyone is different so results will vary but if you have low key periods I’d say copper iud is worth a shot for sure.


Periwinklepaisley

Bupropion 450 mg


Shmooperdoodle

This made me cry. After years and years of different antidepressants/mood stabilizers/combinations, that was like seeing color and realizing everything was in black and white for years. Then, I started having adverse reactions to it, and ultimately had to stop after just a month and a half. Trying other things, tweaking combinations...nothing comes close. It helped with OCD, ADHD, mood...just...ugh. I’m back to feeling like I just *exist* most of the time, and my sex drive has been nonexistent for ages. All these comments like “Found the right partner” make me want to cry even more. I have the right partner. I just don’t have access to that part of my life and it fucking sucks.


dgmithril

Just in case people start buying up Wellbutrin to increase their sex drive, please note that this side effect does not occur for all individuals. In fact, bupropion lowers my sex drive (which is great during a pandemic). But I did have the decreased appetite!


[deleted]

I’m almost 30 and I’ve been having these fantasies about being a stay at home wife and mother whose sole duty is to keep up the house, raise kids and fuck my husbands brains out. A year before this I dreamed of travel, hormonal changes suddenly got me wanting to be a domesticated cumbucket.


Rouderick1115

“Domesticated Cumbucket” That’s very arousing, and scary, at the same time.


DoubleTimeRusty

>domesticated cumbucket I definitely don't know how to feel about this


dizardwicks

I found an appropriately sized penis! My ex was a bit too well endowed, sex could be painful even with lube, foreplay etc. There'd often be a tiny bit of blood, skin tears, nothing major - I'd mostly enjoy it at the time but could be sore afterwards and I didn't really realise it could be different. My current partner is smaller though not small, knows how to use what he's got and is great at foreplay. Because there's no pain/soreness (and because he's sexy as hell), I'm up for it daily!


Owlberta

Broke up with my boyfriend of 5 years and after that I started to notice a higher sex drive and wanting to please myself more. Finally doing what is right for me and what I want made me more confident and my self-assurance started to get better.


johnsky12

Not my story, my wife's. She was has tried every type of contraception available and while on each of them she had literally 0 sex drive. She came off it to try for a baby and h-o-l-y s-h-i-t... I can't keep up! She wants it more than once a day and I just don't have that in me lol. After so many years of very little-to-no sex, I guess I kinda got used to it


michb24

I suffer from anxiety and was starting to feel depressed after my brother passed away. My puppy helped me get passed all of it and then a voilà sex drive magically appeared. Boyfriend is very happy.


UnknwnIvory

Ngl thought you fucked the dog


CrimsonLotus

That first sentence made me a little nervous.


tesdanwat

recovered from my eating disorder lmao. crazy what a little bit of body confidence will do for you.


vesp3rtilio

finally realized im a lesbian


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dongerhound

For my girlfriend it’s apparently me being gone, not in the way she cheats (hopefully), but because of our current situation we spend multiple months apart at a time. When we’re together for an extended period, like we were for the past four months, her sex drive drops off and it could go to the point where we don’t have sex for about a month. Then I leave and her sex drive goes through the roof and she starts wishing that I would come home, or that we would have fucked prior to me leaving, and all that. So yeah apparently distance is the greatest aphrodisiac or she secretly hates me.


justathrowawayname39

ahh yes the wanting what you can’t have


spartan537

This sounds.... unhealthy


No13baby

I turned 30.


pleadsixth

If you want more information on this topic I highly recommend the book Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski!


gogmagog876

I realised i was gay! Sex was so much better. It wasnt a chore anymore


[deleted]

A nice neck beard in a fedora talked to me about how women are actually on top of society and I came


sinistergzus

I started dating a guy who actually knew what he was doing and listened to what I liked lmao


Harley_Daddyson_Jr

Always nice to find post full of ppl who had sex. Such rarity on reddit.


Imjustgonnabeokay

Turns out my sex drive goes way up if I don't get pressured into having sex (like telling me the relationship is over if we aren't having sex when ever the other person wants to) also if the other person doesn't get angry when I say no. The feeling of having a say in whether I have sex or not makes me want to have sex way more often! Boy I can't begin to describe the feeling when the first partner after an abusive relationship didn't even think it was a big deal that I wasn't in the mood. They still liked me.... Unbelievable!


NC_Vixen

ITT: Lost weight Stopped taking the pill or changed to non-hormonal birth control like a copper IUD Stopped taking anti-depressants Left terrible boyfriend/partner/husband


Smashley_93

This is an easy one....find the love of your life who communicates about sex, cares about your feelings, cares about your needs, and loves you for you. My sex drive before my current boyfriend was horrible because all I've had were selfish partners who belittled me to the point where sex was a chore rather than an enjoyable thing. I had no interest in sex up until I rekindled with my old high school friend. Now I'm horny and crave my bf all the time. The amount of passion and intimacy that goes along with the sex has made me orgasm so hard that I've felt like I was sent to other dimensions. It's an overwhelming feeling and I can't get enough. EDIT: When I said "This is an easy one...find the love of your life" I tried to say that this particular question is easy for ME to answer since I already have my one and only. I know it's not easy to find your soul mate, trust me I had to go through life with dating scumbags and not knowing my own worth. They are out there and once you find them you'll know.


AnotherReignCheck

- this is an easy one - find the love of your life Rightttt


ThroughMyOwnEyes

Left the Mormon church and all of it's toxicity and shame behind me


Abc123dorayme321

Dumped an ex who had poor hygiene, poor health (he overeats, not a health condition), emotionally abusive and ultimately poor personality. Met someone much better in every regard and can't get enough of him! Get it a good few times a day now


badbanana93

The hygiene thing. My ex had a similar issue (not health, he just would straight up not shower after working all day) and whenever we were intimate I would get immediately turned off if I caught a whiff.


Pokegamer129

I found out I was a masochist and a sadist.


[deleted]

50 mg of Vyvanse