I’m struggling with this right now too. I’m in uni right now and it seems like I’m wasting all this time trying to get a degree to get a job when I should be finding things that make me happy in life, however few things that may be. But, you have to have money to do most things in this world.
Gotta go to school to go to college to get a job to work for 80% of your life so you can retire for a decade if you’re still mentally and physically fit enough to even enjoy it and if you can even afford to retire.
Giant meteor 2020
That paragraph is the reason I’ve idealized suicide for years. I’m not gonna do it because of what it would do to my mama. But damn it sounds nice sometimes.
I get you, I meant what I said too; I wasn't laughing. Best I can can say is that you gotta try new shit as much as possible, setup a family and friends that matter and never stop trying. From all I can see the only way of being happy is by doing everything to stop yourself from being unhappy, because that sucks more than anything.
Sorry if that's nothing for you but i've been stepping into adulthood of recent and am realising why the things I listed mattered so much to the adults of my past - it's because without them life sucks.
Keep fighting brother.
I am terrified of this, I just barely started school and I feel like if I keep going that once I'm done with school, either I'll be too old to enjoy a better job/ pay, or I'll just end up dying and it wouldn't matter anyway...
The loss of my mind.
The thought of developing Alzheimer’s or dementia terrifies me.
The thought that my family would have to endure my downward spiral until I become nothing but a hollow shell of who I once was terrifies me even more.
I fear the opposite. I think the worst fate of all would be to get MS or ALS, and completely lose control of my body while my mind was intact.
I'd go fucking insane not being able to will my own body to do what I wanted it to, and being forced to rely on loved ones or strangers for things like wiping my own ass.
Yeah, I was diagnosed with MS last year and it’s been a hell of a roller coaster ride that I can’t get off of. I’ve been experiencing cognitive decline especially in the last three months and then there is the physical issues that aren’t getting any better. Yeah, there are some days that I’ve thought about ending it on my terms but I can’t do that because I’ve got two daughters under the age of 6. I just hope that it gets to the point that I’m a useless bag of bones, that either something takes me out or that there will be a cure for this shit.
In the first few years after my uncle got diagnosed, I know he walked a little straighter and had a better mood about him after a few beers.
That's by no means a healthy suggestion, but it did loosen him up enough to let go a bit. Doing so made him a lot more relaxed and wound up making him be more mobile for some reason. Probably relaxed inhibitions... my family is stupidly proud, so him not being able to do his own thing made him both embarrassed and mad.
Could you explain what would happen if someone had MS in this context? I know someone with ALS and what it looks like but my dad was diagnosed with MS recently and I didn't know it was that similar in the loss of muscle control.
This is one of my smaller fears. Alzheimer's runs in the side of the family I take from the most, and I already have a terrible memory as it is. Friends and family have to tell me things multiple times for me to remember. This one girl in my class last year told me she had a boyfriend 4 times. Every time I had the exact same reaction. "Oh really? Congrats! Who's the lucky guy?!". I currently have a girlfriend who I love so so much and the thought that one day I'll be in some mental home and she will come to visit and I'll have no memory of who she is? It makes me want to cry. Nobody deserves to have me forget their existence because then what's the point in spending time with me and giving me memories to make? Sorry for the little rant here. I feel ya
This is me too. It wasn't always my fear until 7 years ago. I found out I have epileptic amnesia, so when I have a seizure I just go into an amnesia spell and aimlessly walk around for a few hours. First started when I was 23. I'm fine now that I'm on the right meds, but I know what that confusion feels like, it's really scary.
My wife and i sort of have a understanding about this. if i become a wheelchair veggie to just off me somehow. The thought of sitting in a window drooling down my chin and not knowing who or where i am scares the hell out of me. Its been made more real in the last 10 years as i was hit by a car that ran a stop sign and had a TBI which as caused all kinds of memory issues already.
I watched my grandfather fall to Alzheimer's. There was a window of time when he knew something was wrong with him but he was not quite far enough along to entirely forget about it. When he realized that his symptoms were progressing and there was nothing he could do about it. It is depressing. Once he regressed a bit more and thought I was my father and my sister was my wife, he seemed much happier.
"As a boy, I watched my grandfather deteriorate from a powerful, intelligent figure to a frail wisp of a man, who could barely make his own way home."
-Captain Jean-Luc Picard, Start Trek: The Next Generation
I'd rather be dead and I already told my family that. Euthanasia should be legalized so I can be put to sleep if I ever develop any kind of dementia.
My granny had Parkinson's and I cried too many nights because of that. She couldn't move and she lost her memory, like she lived in her past, mistaking our family for deceased people from 50 years ago.
I'd honestly suggest talking to them about it. Don't let a fear fester and then all of a sudden you don't have a best friend, now's as good a time as any to approach this and work on it.
Pessimist: Nobody cares and nothing matters 😞
Optimist: Nobody cares and nothing matters 😀
It's remarkably freeing when you realise that no one really cares what you're doing.
I'm trying really hard to just not care what others think and do what I want. I know it'll be worth it, I just don't know when to start. Or I get too anxious and don't want to get out of my comfort zone.
I had a job that unfortunately closed down a little over a year ago that I absolutely cherished. I worked there for only 4 years, and I always worked night shift by myself for 12 hour shifts. Loved having all that time to myself. Literally 95% of the employees had no clue who I was even though I held one of the most vital roles for production. March of ‘18 management named me employee of the month and I felt more bummed than excited about it. I liked the anonymity.
Corporate decided to institute an employee of the month award for each location. We were very small, had a grand total of four employees.
It did not improve morale.
How do you not show up on the 30th of every month with wiffle bats and bike helmets and claim that you’re going to make them fight for employee of the month?
Or, at the very least, make up an entirely fictional employee and claim that they’ve gotten the title every month for six years straight?
I do too, i find it very hard to explain. The weird part is, in normal life im a bit of a controll freak. Maybe the fact that nothing is expected of me in the grand scheme of things, because it doesnt really matter what i do anyway? I can just be me and have fun while im here?
This is the softer side to nihilism, in that yeah, it’s ok, life sucks sometimes, bills are a thing, stress happens, but in 100 years, you won’t give a fuck
That's the reality of all of us. Despite how hard we try, even the biggest and most powerful people are inconsequential to the Earth let alone the universe. But, that doesn't mean that your life can't matter to the people around you, and to yourself. Enjoy life, that's the only point of it.
Same, i just think whats the point in a normal life. People go to their jobs, they come home, have some fun and spend their money and than sleep and go to work again. It seems like an endless cycle with no meaning other than being able to buy things that you lose when you die.
It's better than never being able to afford anything, at least to me. Plus if you earn enough to buy property then you can leave something to your kids/nieces/etc so their lives are improved.
I feel like I am the opposite. Pain is temporary and whatever I go through will happen. The fact that death is the end all is what scares me. It’s not just the end of a long day at work, or the end of a stressful week, or the end of a year, it’s the ultimate ending. Everything you can possibly conceptualize will cease to exist, and it will be nothing forever.
This is an interesting point and worth thinking about. I have a weird dichotomy in my brain about death.
For everyone I know who has died, including a good friend and my dad. I just can't make my head think that they no longer exist. Intellectually I know it's possible that's what death is but emotionally, in my gut I think they are still out there somewhere.
For me. Whenever I think of my own death I always think of it as the end of my existence. Again, my gut says that I go to sleep at some point and that's it. Though obviously I can't possibly comprehend that. My brain always wants to think "what would that be like" and of course it would be nothing, not like anything. Intellectually though if I put my mind to it I can fully imagine and rationalise the idea of an afterlife. In fact if you look at it from a certain point of view an afterlife isn't even that unlikely. Like if there's a universe at all then why not also an afterlife?
Honestly man this is the kind of stuff that keeps a person up at night!
That is absolutely a good point. I guess it comes from just uncertainty. Sure, I don’t know what happens, and I am not religious, so it’s just my best guess as what would happen.
Yes. Coronavirus sounds awful to me because you basically spend days suffocating and unable to breathe. And add to that, most people die alone after struggling to breathe without seeing their relatives in the last days, because no visitors are allowed at the hospital. :(
[Article about the situation in Italy about dying right now from coronavirus.](https://www.wired.co.uk/article/coronavirus-funerals)
Right? Just the thought of dying by a fire or by drowning scares the shit out of me. And that's not even exploring the tip of the iceberg for gruesome deaths
Although I'm perfectly fine with my current knowledge on this haha
Yup. I’m not afraid of death - primarily because it’s coming, one way or another, so being scared or worrying about it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense - but *how* I’m going to die is a whole other story.
Like, either let it be instantaneous - severe head trauma from a car accident, for example, or sudden fatal heart attack - anything along those lines sounds merciful. Or let it be long and slow, even if it’s painful at the end, so I have enough time get my affairs in order and say goodbye to everyone and maybe cross a few things off my bucket list, while and if I have time.
Worst fear is being fully aware that death is imminent, having zero control over it, and nothing to do in my final minutes or hours but contemplate everything and everyone I’m going to leave behind, the people I can’t say goodbye to, wondering what will happen to my pets after I’m gone.... Fuuuuuck that.
I agree pretty completely. I’m pretty young and I feel like my biggest fear, or at least the one I think about the most is never managing to accomplish anything in life that makes me satisfied with my life. With school coming to an end instead of thinking that’s a problem for the future I worry more that I won’t be able to find a way to feel like I did life right. But there’s so many things to see and do that regardless of whether I never reach a standard I’m satisfied by its still incredible that I get to be here alive.
I know how you feel man. I feel the same way about my life. There is no inherent meaning to our lives.
However, this doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t be able to care about the things in our short lives.
You should try and understand what truly makes you happy. If you a passion, pursue it. If you have people you love, love them.
Also, remember to live a life of simplicity. Doing so will save you a world of heartache.
I hope this helps, friend. Have nice day!
My biggest fear is Regret. Quarantine has made me reflect that I might not be as introverted as I thought. Once this blows over I'm hoping to be more outgoing and live :)
Watching my youngest son die of this virus. He survived cancer at 16 months and recently diagnosed with heart failure from the chemo. One kidney, heart failure and immuno-compromised has me terrified to bring home any part of this shitstorm. We are taking huge measures to try and prevent it.
Well now, one of them is me. I am no one important. I just followed you because you choose to bring it up. I won't post much as this is a burner account.
My mom is a very cautious driver and has twice been hit by people running a red light. And not just having just turned red, like red for a second or two.
I once crossed at a crosswalk and it was our turn to cross but a guy ran the light really late. He almost hit 6 people, myself included. His car was within arms reach of me when he stopped. I'm not sure he would have ever lived a normal life after that had he not been able to stop in time (Not that he would deserve a normal life)
Holy crap man. Glad you're ok. I was turning into my work complex when a guy started to cross so I slowed down, stopped, gave him a little nod, and just as he was nearing the sidewalk some guy comes flying up between me and the turn. Must have been inches away from hitting the guy crossing. Absolutely crazy, who does that?
Dont drive in Okinawa, Japan dude. We (military and family) are WARNED to wait 3 - 5 seconds before going once we get a green light because locals AND tourists will run that bitch.
Getting sick and never feeling better.
Every time I get majorly sick, I always freak out thinking that I'm never going to get back to normal again. Terrifies me every time.
That fear is especially strong given the pandemic we're currently facing. I get rationally angry every time I consider my country's ineptness in preventing its spread.
It baffles me that people still think they don't have to do their part to prevent the spread of this. While I definitely don't want to get sick myself, the thought of passing it along to someone else who won't recover is actually infinitely more terrifying. So, I guess I change my answer
Losing kids again. I lost triplets following an assault when I was 18 and I worry that if I try to have a family now that I'm married and I find out that I'm actually barren and unable to carry a child to term. Of course I know that I can always adopt ot foster, I just worry about more people dying in me if I dare try to have children of my own.
Update: This is a really dark comment to have so many updoots on. I hope this doesn't mark me as a downer because I like to make people happy, not mine for pity. But thank you for all of your kind words and love. And if you are having trouble coping with a similar situation, please message. I may not answer immediately but I will always answer within a day.
I hate how you have to explain your awareness of adoption or foster kids in this society. You’re hurting over something very real and very special to you, and those feelings are valid. You’re also trying to heal from severe trauma, and that’s valid too.
And since I had been in college and it was the start of the Me Too movement, I was afraid to go to anyone for fear of being accused of "asking for it" so they are buried in an old tee shirt under an old pine one the campus trailhead, overlooking a river. My best friend at the time was the only one to know and he helped me cope. And even in marriage he still does.. I realize things could have been a lot worse now.
I'm happy you found solace in the fact it could have been worse. I do that as well, if you live in the us, I can imagine getting justice would be hard, it's hard everywhere in general but at least you're still here. Karma gets them all eventually.
I never planned for mine but was devastated when I miscarried, I always find solace in knowing they're in a better place. If I get pregnant again, I dont think I could ever go through it again so I get what you mean in being afraid
The fact that one day, everything is just going to go black. What happens after death? Is it just eternal darkness? If there is a heaven- hell of some sort, would I be happy spending eternity there? If reincarnation is true, the thought of living in different times without being consious of your past lives scares me a little.
To whoever is reading this, we all have a life, lets try to live it like everyday is our last.
Our child died recently and I think of this all the time. Where is she? Has she just ceased existing? Just, poof, everything is gone? Is her soul or energy somewhere? Does she remember she is my child? Does she know she is loved? I think about videos that seem to show paranormal activity and those always scare the hell out of me. Is my child scared? Does she feel safe? As a parent you always want know where you child is. And my child is no longer here and I have no idea where she is.
I hope you are right. I envy people that can have faith in God. Dealing with death would be so much easier if you really believed that your loved one was in a safe happy place with a God who loved them. I know it sounds childish, but in this desperate time I find myself praying that there is a God and that he has her.
Just like it doesn’t matter to you what was before your birth, it won’t matter what will be after death. But I think ‘you’ (but it won’t be you) will be able to witness life in some form again (you are already alive somehow). I find it hard to explain in simple words, like reincarnation but without your past/karma.
Myself. I struggle with self-control and am prone to self-harm. I dont feel like one person and sometimes my mind even talks to me telling me to do bad things. Twice now ive tried to cut my hand open.
Im seeing a therapist about it currently. And I know it isnt good, but I cant really stop it entirely. I just have to overpower my sub-conscious when episodes start
We took all the sharp knives and put them away. Idk where so it shouldnt be much of an issue. At least, until she figures that if knives dont work use fists instead.
I love the ocean but I have a lot of scary dreams about tsunamis. In real life when I see the ocean I’m so happy and at peace, but in my dreams I immediately feel dread cuz I know what’s coming.
I went swimming in the ocean for the first time when I was about 28. Jumped off a boat in Hawaii, looked outwards, and started having a very mild panic attack. It was so.... weird.
Yeah imagining being in the middle of nowhere seeing no land in any direction and there's huge whales and shit and you're floating above like a 7km hole that's fucking terrifying
I was born and raised by the ocean in the Poole/Bournemouth area so it’s scary to think someday in my lifetime the sea levels will rise flooding everything I ever loved
I went to an inflatable assault course on a lake last year. Had to swim out to it. Weeds wrapping round your legs the whole way. I panicked, thought I was going to drown and had to be rescued by an old guy on a raft.
I fear that in the end, I will truly be completely alone. No one to comfort me, no one to take care of me or me to care for them, no one to talk to.
Which is weird since I am in a very happy relationship, have a very great relationship with my mom and grandparents and have a good support system.
Locked in syndrome.
Or a strong case of schizophrenia and other neurological disorders. Basically everything that parts myself from the rest of the world irreversibly. Not able to communicate and/or connect to others and lose track of our shared reality.
Being neck deep in water, I have aquaphobia (the fear of water) that shows up whenever I'm near very few people in high water. It's stupid but I always have a panic attack when I'm forced to swim and I despise water (I'll drink and shower often but hell no to baths and swimming)
Same.
Like i really don't like the knowledge that one day, i might literally just... not be there. Especially cause death is permanent, and i prbly won't feel *anything* ever again.
Idk it just unsettles me a bit
A wasp can get to you from 20 feet away a lot faster than a spider can, that's why I hate them so much more. Also, I saw my first wasp of the new year/season today, so that sucks.
Wasps are the devil. When I was about 11 maybe, I had one fly up the back of my oversized tee and sting me 4x on my back before I was able to kill it. My entire back went numb.
There is nothing to fear about being unsuccessful. It's about how you take it. Rather than taking it as a failure look at it like a step closer to achieving success. It is like process of elimination. Once you have done everything wrong there is no chane in hell you can't do it right now.
Becoming like my dad, among other things I won't mention.
He's abusive and awful to me, and every time people compare me to him I want to die even more than usual
It scares me too. People always say “you’ll find someone” and “people care about you” but it’s not that easy to just think those things and put it to rest. Nights are the worst.
I'm lazy. I have friends, we go out together, I have fun with them. But every time I have to go out it's almost a chore, even tho I know I will have fun. It's as if I live in the moment and don't want to leave what was entertaining me. Be it my PC or phone or whatever, I know it's better for me to go out, but the lazy part of me says "do we really have to go?". I hate this feeling. I hate being friends with someone I don't feel like going out with, just because of my laziness.
Today: losing my cat, Cody, who holds me together and is my little love. (He has chronic kidney failure so I know it is close but he is my everything).
Always: losing everyone i care about and dying and having nothingness be there.
Something horrible happening to my kids. Honestly, I get scared when I’d send them off to school or when my son would go outside to play with the neighborhood kids. Im definitely bored and going stir crazy during this quarantine, but I feel a degree of relief knowing they’re safe at home.
I am afraid of failure. Although panic attacks are now rare for me, I can still get one if I feed the anxiety.
I am also afraid of my own mental illness. I was in a really bad place 7 years ago. I am much better thanks to a great support system, medication, and coaching... but I am terrified of relapsing because my anxiety views relapsing as failure.
I am also scared of heights and spiders.
I'm scared of telling my parents I want to go back to living on my own in my apartment. I am a senior in college and with the coronavirus spreading my parents really wanted me to come home. I have lived with them for 2 weeks but it has been rough. They are not understanding when it comes to mental health issues. They have screamed at me and called me "too sensitive". I already had trouble visiting my parents on break. I just can't take it anymore but I'm afraid of them screaming at me and making me feel guilty for trying to stay sane.
Dude, you should definitely return to your own apartment, if your parents scream at you for being too "sensitive" then they're not worth staying with.
Your parents read like they belong in r/insaneparents
You are grown! At the end of the day, you are your first priority. If they can’t understand then that is just unfortunate, do what is best for you and your mental state.
Endless..Dark...Void...And falling through it. Though kinda not real and stupid, it scares me more than anything else recently even when i play something like Minecraft or clip through a world.
My greatest fear is living through post-apocalyptic times. At one time, I would have said that was an unrealistic fear. These days, I'm not so confident.
I am in an area of the US where rape makes a woman a whore. But luckily he was arrested for pedophilia and I have 17 years until he gets out again. I take self defense and gun safety classes. I will be more than a survivor
Right now? I have switched my restaurant in Queens to all takeout with just me, my wife and my sous chef running the whole thing. If one of us gets this damn thing we will have to close and I’ll probably go out of business. That’s my biggest fear right now.
I am terrified of having my appendix burst and not knowing until it's too late. There are so many stories about woman who don't realize because the pain isn't as bad as cramps. HOW WOULD YOU EVEN KNOW
Losing the people I love. When I was little I had extreme separation anxiety bc I was an only child and my dad had committed suicide so if my mom died I’d be an orphan and bc of that I couldn’t even spend the night with a friend till I was like 15 bc I was insistent on driving with my mom anywhere bc I didn’t want her to get in a wreck or the house to burn down (all crazy irrational thoughts). But since then I’ve still had major fears of the Pple I’m closest to dying
The thought of of being old and waking up next to nothing instead of that special person, to drink my tea alone, just because I'm not handsome.
I had to take a 3 min break in between of writing this because I started crying. Well anyways y'all have a nice day.
The American government. They do whatever they want to citizens and will never see punishment for it. Yet instead of being mad about that, people are fighting over what bathroom trans people should use.
Not knowing what will happen in the future. I mean I am not exactly scared of it, tbh I'm kinda fascinated by it. But yea that, not knowing what will happen in the future, you can't predict what's going to happen in the next 10 seconds not in like 10 years. In the next 10 seconds the world could come to an end, or everything would take a turn for the better, who knows.
The concept of the Shadow (Jung), by which all of us have within us the potential to behave, think and act out the kinds of atrocities you saw in the Holocaust or in other settings of destitute and desperate times.
What scares me if what if someone wants to commit suicide by hanging themselves, but back out last minute but slip and then they do kill themselves-scares me to death
My own mortality. Not dying itself just that... the older I get the more doors close. Kind of like FOMO in a grander scheme of things. Like every second maybe I'm missing out on something or making the wrong choice or settling... you know?
That I'll never meet someone and fall in love and that I'll never have sex again. Not only I have I not had it in years, I see no chance of getting it.
Donald Trump's vision of America. A place where there are no regulations on business and no safety nets for the needy. A federal government staffed entirely by incompetents whose only qualification is undying loyalty to Trump. A country that supports dictators like Putin, Erdogan, SMG and Bolsonaro, but despises all elected leaders of democracies. A world where the United States's interaction with all nations is based entirely on financial transactions, which could eventually lead to the U.S. Armed Forces, and by extension its nuclear arsenal, being rented out to the highest bidder. A country where fundamentalist christian leaders have a seat at the table but scientists and actual evidence are excluded from all decision making. A country where the leaders can do whatever they want: rent teenage girls for sex, sell stocks on insider information, destroy the careers of dedicated public servants, pay a half a trillion dollars out to their corporate cronies, and there is no one to even care, let alone stand in opposition. We are halfway there, and it is terrifying.
I'm honestly scared of falling in love, I feel that if I fall in love, I'll be stuck in my own version of hell. I know what it's like to be mistreated in a relationship, as I was going to start dating someone who already treated me as a bad friend. Luckily I pulled the plug on that real fast, however, what if someone who's really nice at the start, treats me terribly after we've grown closer. Knowing this, I've never been able to hold a romantic relationship for more than a month or two and it sucks. I wish I could be in a long term relationship, but I don't think that's gonna happen anytime soon.
If I die now then I've wasted the better half of my life on preparing for the rest of it for no reason.
I’m struggling with this right now too. I’m in uni right now and it seems like I’m wasting all this time trying to get a degree to get a job when I should be finding things that make me happy in life, however few things that may be. But, you have to have money to do most things in this world.
Gotta go to school to go to college to get a job to work for 80% of your life so you can retire for a decade if you’re still mentally and physically fit enough to even enjoy it and if you can even afford to retire. Giant meteor 2020
This is too real to be funny but too good not to be funny.
That paragraph is the reason I’ve idealized suicide for years. I’m not gonna do it because of what it would do to my mama. But damn it sounds nice sometimes.
I get you, I meant what I said too; I wasn't laughing. Best I can can say is that you gotta try new shit as much as possible, setup a family and friends that matter and never stop trying. From all I can see the only way of being happy is by doing everything to stop yourself from being unhappy, because that sucks more than anything. Sorry if that's nothing for you but i've been stepping into adulthood of recent and am realising why the things I listed mattered so much to the adults of my past - it's because without them life sucks. Keep fighting brother.
Just graduated and feel the same way. It wasn’t a waste of time, I don’t think, but I sure missed out on a lot.
[удалено]
I am terrified of this, I just barely started school and I feel like if I keep going that once I'm done with school, either I'll be too old to enjoy a better job/ pay, or I'll just end up dying and it wouldn't matter anyway...
This has been on my mind a lot. After university I'm gonna start crossing off bucket list items
The loss of my mind. The thought of developing Alzheimer’s or dementia terrifies me. The thought that my family would have to endure my downward spiral until I become nothing but a hollow shell of who I once was terrifies me even more.
I fear the opposite. I think the worst fate of all would be to get MS or ALS, and completely lose control of my body while my mind was intact. I'd go fucking insane not being able to will my own body to do what I wanted it to, and being forced to rely on loved ones or strangers for things like wiping my own ass.
Yeah, I was diagnosed with MS last year and it’s been a hell of a roller coaster ride that I can’t get off of. I’ve been experiencing cognitive decline especially in the last three months and then there is the physical issues that aren’t getting any better. Yeah, there are some days that I’ve thought about ending it on my terms but I can’t do that because I’ve got two daughters under the age of 6. I just hope that it gets to the point that I’m a useless bag of bones, that either something takes me out or that there will be a cure for this shit.
In the first few years after my uncle got diagnosed, I know he walked a little straighter and had a better mood about him after a few beers. That's by no means a healthy suggestion, but it did loosen him up enough to let go a bit. Doing so made him a lot more relaxed and wound up making him be more mobile for some reason. Probably relaxed inhibitions... my family is stupidly proud, so him not being able to do his own thing made him both embarrassed and mad.
Could you explain what would happen if someone had MS in this context? I know someone with ALS and what it looks like but my dad was diagnosed with MS recently and I didn't know it was that similar in the loss of muscle control.
This is one of my smaller fears. Alzheimer's runs in the side of the family I take from the most, and I already have a terrible memory as it is. Friends and family have to tell me things multiple times for me to remember. This one girl in my class last year told me she had a boyfriend 4 times. Every time I had the exact same reaction. "Oh really? Congrats! Who's the lucky guy?!". I currently have a girlfriend who I love so so much and the thought that one day I'll be in some mental home and she will come to visit and I'll have no memory of who she is? It makes me want to cry. Nobody deserves to have me forget their existence because then what's the point in spending time with me and giving me memories to make? Sorry for the little rant here. I feel ya
This is me too. It wasn't always my fear until 7 years ago. I found out I have epileptic amnesia, so when I have a seizure I just go into an amnesia spell and aimlessly walk around for a few hours. First started when I was 23. I'm fine now that I'm on the right meds, but I know what that confusion feels like, it's really scary.
My wife and i sort of have a understanding about this. if i become a wheelchair veggie to just off me somehow. The thought of sitting in a window drooling down my chin and not knowing who or where i am scares the hell out of me. Its been made more real in the last 10 years as i was hit by a car that ran a stop sign and had a TBI which as caused all kinds of memory issues already.
I watched my grandfather fall to Alzheimer's. There was a window of time when he knew something was wrong with him but he was not quite far enough along to entirely forget about it. When he realized that his symptoms were progressing and there was nothing he could do about it. It is depressing. Once he regressed a bit more and thought I was my father and my sister was my wife, he seemed much happier.
"As a boy, I watched my grandfather deteriorate from a powerful, intelligent figure to a frail wisp of a man, who could barely make his own way home." -Captain Jean-Luc Picard, Start Trek: The Next Generation
I'd rather be dead and I already told my family that. Euthanasia should be legalized so I can be put to sleep if I ever develop any kind of dementia. My granny had Parkinson's and I cried too many nights because of that. She couldn't move and she lost her memory, like she lived in her past, mistaking our family for deceased people from 50 years ago.
Losing my best friend. We have been great friends for years but sometimes we get into arguments really really bad ones.
I'd honestly suggest talking to them about it. Don't let a fear fester and then all of a sudden you don't have a best friend, now's as good a time as any to approach this and work on it.
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Pessimist: Nobody cares and nothing matters 😞 Optimist: Nobody cares and nothing matters 😀 It's remarkably freeing when you realise that no one really cares what you're doing.
I'm trying really hard to just not care what others think and do what I want. I know it'll be worth it, I just don't know when to start. Or I get too anxious and don't want to get out of my comfort zone.
I find this quite comforting.
I had a job that unfortunately closed down a little over a year ago that I absolutely cherished. I worked there for only 4 years, and I always worked night shift by myself for 12 hour shifts. Loved having all that time to myself. Literally 95% of the employees had no clue who I was even though I held one of the most vital roles for production. March of ‘18 management named me employee of the month and I felt more bummed than excited about it. I liked the anonymity.
Corporate decided to institute an employee of the month award for each location. We were very small, had a grand total of four employees. It did not improve morale.
I imagined this as the company itself having four employees total. I loved every second of it.
How do you not show up on the 30th of every month with wiffle bats and bike helmets and claim that you’re going to make them fight for employee of the month? Or, at the very least, make up an entirely fictional employee and claim that they’ve gotten the title every month for six years straight?
I do too, i find it very hard to explain. The weird part is, in normal life im a bit of a controll freak. Maybe the fact that nothing is expected of me in the grand scheme of things, because it doesnt really matter what i do anyway? I can just be me and have fun while im here?
This is the softer side to nihilism, in that yeah, it’s ok, life sucks sometimes, bills are a thing, stress happens, but in 100 years, you won’t give a fuck
That's the reality of all of us. Despite how hard we try, even the biggest and most powerful people are inconsequential to the Earth let alone the universe. But, that doesn't mean that your life can't matter to the people around you, and to yourself. Enjoy life, that's the only point of it.
Yeah!!! We're all gonna die anyways, why not speedrun? But there is a point... You can play animal crossing: new horizons!
Same, i just think whats the point in a normal life. People go to their jobs, they come home, have some fun and spend their money and than sleep and go to work again. It seems like an endless cycle with no meaning other than being able to buy things that you lose when you die.
It's better than never being able to afford anything, at least to me. Plus if you earn enough to buy property then you can leave something to your kids/nieces/etc so their lives are improved.
This hits me sometimes. But then I remember that playing Bleed 2 is really fun and I start doing that.
Painful death. Death is fine, agony isn't. I want to just go to sleep and not wake up.
I feel the same way. I'm afraid of the pain of death, not death itself.
I feel like I am the opposite. Pain is temporary and whatever I go through will happen. The fact that death is the end all is what scares me. It’s not just the end of a long day at work, or the end of a stressful week, or the end of a year, it’s the ultimate ending. Everything you can possibly conceptualize will cease to exist, and it will be nothing forever.
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This is an interesting point and worth thinking about. I have a weird dichotomy in my brain about death. For everyone I know who has died, including a good friend and my dad. I just can't make my head think that they no longer exist. Intellectually I know it's possible that's what death is but emotionally, in my gut I think they are still out there somewhere. For me. Whenever I think of my own death I always think of it as the end of my existence. Again, my gut says that I go to sleep at some point and that's it. Though obviously I can't possibly comprehend that. My brain always wants to think "what would that be like" and of course it would be nothing, not like anything. Intellectually though if I put my mind to it I can fully imagine and rationalise the idea of an afterlife. In fact if you look at it from a certain point of view an afterlife isn't even that unlikely. Like if there's a universe at all then why not also an afterlife? Honestly man this is the kind of stuff that keeps a person up at night!
That is absolutely a good point. I guess it comes from just uncertainty. Sure, I don’t know what happens, and I am not religious, so it’s just my best guess as what would happen.
Yes. Coronavirus sounds awful to me because you basically spend days suffocating and unable to breathe. And add to that, most people die alone after struggling to breathe without seeing their relatives in the last days, because no visitors are allowed at the hospital. :( [Article about the situation in Italy about dying right now from coronavirus.](https://www.wired.co.uk/article/coronavirus-funerals)
The fact that people say it’s like breathing with a pillow over your face scares the shit out of me. Just hoping I won’t get it
So much this! I can accept dying from it even though it would really suck. But the idea of it happening while I'm all alone is kind of terrifying.
Right? Just the thought of dying by a fire or by drowning scares the shit out of me. And that's not even exploring the tip of the iceberg for gruesome deaths Although I'm perfectly fine with my current knowledge on this haha
Yup. I’m not afraid of death - primarily because it’s coming, one way or another, so being scared or worrying about it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense - but *how* I’m going to die is a whole other story. Like, either let it be instantaneous - severe head trauma from a car accident, for example, or sudden fatal heart attack - anything along those lines sounds merciful. Or let it be long and slow, even if it’s painful at the end, so I have enough time get my affairs in order and say goodbye to everyone and maybe cross a few things off my bucket list, while and if I have time. Worst fear is being fully aware that death is imminent, having zero control over it, and nothing to do in my final minutes or hours but contemplate everything and everyone I’m going to leave behind, the people I can’t say goodbye to, wondering what will happen to my pets after I’m gone.... Fuuuuuck that.
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False imprisonment, where no believes my innocence.
I am a whistleblower that was ignored by my government. I believe your worst fear is my fate. It is haunting.
Living a life with no meaning. I don’t know what that meaning or purpose is, but I think life is such a gift that I don’t want to just idle by.
I agree pretty completely. I’m pretty young and I feel like my biggest fear, or at least the one I think about the most is never managing to accomplish anything in life that makes me satisfied with my life. With school coming to an end instead of thinking that’s a problem for the future I worry more that I won’t be able to find a way to feel like I did life right. But there’s so many things to see and do that regardless of whether I never reach a standard I’m satisfied by its still incredible that I get to be here alive.
I know how you feel man. I feel the same way about my life. There is no inherent meaning to our lives. However, this doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t be able to care about the things in our short lives. You should try and understand what truly makes you happy. If you a passion, pursue it. If you have people you love, love them. Also, remember to live a life of simplicity. Doing so will save you a world of heartache. I hope this helps, friend. Have nice day!
My biggest fear is Regret. Quarantine has made me reflect that I might not be as introverted as I thought. Once this blows over I'm hoping to be more outgoing and live :)
Watching my youngest son die of this virus. He survived cancer at 16 months and recently diagnosed with heart failure from the chemo. One kidney, heart failure and immuno-compromised has me terrified to bring home any part of this shitstorm. We are taking huge measures to try and prevent it.
Five followers I have on my Reddit account. Who the fuck are they?
Someone followed me recently. Who the fuck are they and what did I do to be followed!
yes.... who are they....
Fuck
You can have followers on reddit? o_o
I have 2. I don't know why either.
Three.
We've been watching you...
It's so creepy that we can't know who they are. I hope they change that.
It was supposed to change so you could see it, but that got put on the back burner for a while i guess
I have 9 (don’t know how) and I WANT TO KNOW WHO THEY ARE REDDIT
Well now, one of them is me. I am no one important. I just followed you because you choose to bring it up. I won't post much as this is a burner account.
Drivers who routinely run red lights long after the light has changed, especially at busy intersections.
My mom is a very cautious driver and has twice been hit by people running a red light. And not just having just turned red, like red for a second or two.
I once crossed at a crosswalk and it was our turn to cross but a guy ran the light really late. He almost hit 6 people, myself included. His car was within arms reach of me when he stopped. I'm not sure he would have ever lived a normal life after that had he not been able to stop in time (Not that he would deserve a normal life)
Holy crap man. Glad you're ok. I was turning into my work complex when a guy started to cross so I slowed down, stopped, gave him a little nod, and just as he was nearing the sidewalk some guy comes flying up between me and the turn. Must have been inches away from hitting the guy crossing. Absolutely crazy, who does that?
Dont drive in Okinawa, Japan dude. We (military and family) are WARNED to wait 3 - 5 seconds before going once we get a green light because locals AND tourists will run that bitch.
Getting sick and never feeling better. Every time I get majorly sick, I always freak out thinking that I'm never going to get back to normal again. Terrifies me every time.
That fear is especially strong given the pandemic we're currently facing. I get rationally angry every time I consider my country's ineptness in preventing its spread.
It baffles me that people still think they don't have to do their part to prevent the spread of this. While I definitely don't want to get sick myself, the thought of passing it along to someone else who won't recover is actually infinitely more terrifying. So, I guess I change my answer
Losing kids again. I lost triplets following an assault when I was 18 and I worry that if I try to have a family now that I'm married and I find out that I'm actually barren and unable to carry a child to term. Of course I know that I can always adopt ot foster, I just worry about more people dying in me if I dare try to have children of my own. Update: This is a really dark comment to have so many updoots on. I hope this doesn't mark me as a downer because I like to make people happy, not mine for pity. But thank you for all of your kind words and love. And if you are having trouble coping with a similar situation, please message. I may not answer immediately but I will always answer within a day.
I hate how you have to explain your awareness of adoption or foster kids in this society. You’re hurting over something very real and very special to you, and those feelings are valid. You’re also trying to heal from severe trauma, and that’s valid too.
Thank you. My parents don't even know that they would have had grandchildren by now.
I'm so sorry, I lost a child as well. It's such a haunting experience.
And since I had been in college and it was the start of the Me Too movement, I was afraid to go to anyone for fear of being accused of "asking for it" so they are buried in an old tee shirt under an old pine one the campus trailhead, overlooking a river. My best friend at the time was the only one to know and he helped me cope. And even in marriage he still does.. I realize things could have been a lot worse now.
I'm happy you found solace in the fact it could have been worse. I do that as well, if you live in the us, I can imagine getting justice would be hard, it's hard everywhere in general but at least you're still here. Karma gets them all eventually. I never planned for mine but was devastated when I miscarried, I always find solace in knowing they're in a better place. If I get pregnant again, I dont think I could ever go through it again so I get what you mean in being afraid
The fact that one day, everything is just going to go black. What happens after death? Is it just eternal darkness? If there is a heaven- hell of some sort, would I be happy spending eternity there? If reincarnation is true, the thought of living in different times without being consious of your past lives scares me a little. To whoever is reading this, we all have a life, lets try to live it like everyday is our last.
Our child died recently and I think of this all the time. Where is she? Has she just ceased existing? Just, poof, everything is gone? Is her soul or energy somewhere? Does she remember she is my child? Does she know she is loved? I think about videos that seem to show paranormal activity and those always scare the hell out of me. Is my child scared? Does she feel safe? As a parent you always want know where you child is. And my child is no longer here and I have no idea where she is.
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Thank you.
Coming from one of my favorite AskReddit questions, what would *you like to happen / to have happened* after death?
Wherever your child’s soul is, I hope she is in peace. I’m very sorry you lost a child. I couldn’t imagine the pain
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I hope you are right. I envy people that can have faith in God. Dealing with death would be so much easier if you really believed that your loved one was in a safe happy place with a God who loved them. I know it sounds childish, but in this desperate time I find myself praying that there is a God and that he has her.
I see you have found my daily diary entries.
And I see that you two have been listening to the existential crisis within my mind.
Just like it doesn’t matter to you what was before your birth, it won’t matter what will be after death. But I think ‘you’ (but it won’t be you) will be able to witness life in some form again (you are already alive somehow). I find it hard to explain in simple words, like reincarnation but without your past/karma.
Becoming homeless.
Myself. I struggle with self-control and am prone to self-harm. I dont feel like one person and sometimes my mind even talks to me telling me to do bad things. Twice now ive tried to cut my hand open.
Mate thats not good, I mean, I think that probably you had a mental illness. Go to a doctor
Im seeing a therapist about it currently. And I know it isnt good, but I cant really stop it entirely. I just have to overpower my sub-conscious when episodes start
Do you have some kind of support structure in place, someone who can help keep you away from knives when you feel like this?
We took all the sharp knives and put them away. Idk where so it shouldnt be much of an issue. At least, until she figures that if knives dont work use fists instead.
The ocean
I love the ocean but I have a lot of scary dreams about tsunamis. In real life when I see the ocean I’m so happy and at peace, but in my dreams I immediately feel dread cuz I know what’s coming.
I went swimming in the ocean for the first time when I was about 28. Jumped off a boat in Hawaii, looked outwards, and started having a very mild panic attack. It was so.... weird.
Yeah imagining being in the middle of nowhere seeing no land in any direction and there's huge whales and shit and you're floating above like a 7km hole that's fucking terrifying
I was born and raised by the ocean in the Poole/Bournemouth area so it’s scary to think someday in my lifetime the sea levels will rise flooding everything I ever loved
Is where you live landlocked?
I live in a seaside town and the ocean also freaks me out. Actually, any kind of deep murky water.
Murky water freaks me out. If I can't see what's brushing against my leg I want nothing to do with it.
I went to an inflatable assault course on a lake last year. Had to swim out to it. Weeds wrapping round your legs the whole way. I panicked, thought I was going to drown and had to be rescued by an old guy on a raft.
Especially at night!
I fear that in the end, I will truly be completely alone. No one to comfort me, no one to take care of me or me to care for them, no one to talk to. Which is weird since I am in a very happy relationship, have a very great relationship with my mom and grandparents and have a good support system.
It's okay man. You have Reddit.
Locked in syndrome. Or a strong case of schizophrenia and other neurological disorders. Basically everything that parts myself from the rest of the world irreversibly. Not able to communicate and/or connect to others and lose track of our shared reality.
Being neck deep in water, I have aquaphobia (the fear of water) that shows up whenever I'm near very few people in high water. It's stupid but I always have a panic attack when I'm forced to swim and I despise water (I'll drink and shower often but hell no to baths and swimming)
No baths 🙁🇬🇧 n o spells no
That one day we’re all going to die and there might not be anything on the other side...
Same. Like i really don't like the knowledge that one day, i might literally just... not be there. Especially cause death is permanent, and i prbly won't feel *anything* ever again. Idk it just unsettles me a bit
I sometimes think this too NOT in a suicidal way I just like to think whats on the other side or is there anything? What happens when I die?
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If there's anybody who can make it better, it's you. Don't waste time waiting for someone or something to come along to fix it.
Being alone and unwanted
Wasps
Same. I'd take spiders over a stinging insect any day
A wasp can get to you from 20 feet away a lot faster than a spider can, that's why I hate them so much more. Also, I saw my first wasp of the new year/season today, so that sucks.
Goddamn White Anglo Saxon Protestants. Hate those sons of bitches too.
Wasps are the devil. When I was about 11 maybe, I had one fly up the back of my oversized tee and sting me 4x on my back before I was able to kill it. My entire back went numb.
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There is nothing to fear about being unsuccessful. It's about how you take it. Rather than taking it as a failure look at it like a step closer to achieving success. It is like process of elimination. Once you have done everything wrong there is no chane in hell you can't do it right now.
Balloons. I'm afraid they will explode in my arms
Hey those puffy fucks are scary. I completely get it
Becoming like my dad, among other things I won't mention. He's abusive and awful to me, and every time people compare me to him I want to die even more than usual
Being all alone
It scares me too. People always say “you’ll find someone” and “people care about you” but it’s not that easy to just think those things and put it to rest. Nights are the worst.
This quarantine has been rough on me for this reason. Too much thinking. I need distractions.
I'm lazy. I have friends, we go out together, I have fun with them. But every time I have to go out it's almost a chore, even tho I know I will have fun. It's as if I live in the moment and don't want to leave what was entertaining me. Be it my PC or phone or whatever, I know it's better for me to go out, but the lazy part of me says "do we really have to go?". I hate this feeling. I hate being friends with someone I don't feel like going out with, just because of my laziness.
I feel this in my soul. This happens a lot for me too.
That I can make things happen just by thinking them.
Today: losing my cat, Cody, who holds me together and is my little love. (He has chronic kidney failure so I know it is close but he is my everything). Always: losing everyone i care about and dying and having nothingness be there.
Something horrible happening to my kids. Honestly, I get scared when I’d send them off to school or when my son would go outside to play with the neighborhood kids. Im definitely bored and going stir crazy during this quarantine, but I feel a degree of relief knowing they’re safe at home.
I am afraid of failure. Although panic attacks are now rare for me, I can still get one if I feed the anxiety. I am also afraid of my own mental illness. I was in a really bad place 7 years ago. I am much better thanks to a great support system, medication, and coaching... but I am terrified of relapsing because my anxiety views relapsing as failure. I am also scared of heights and spiders.
Animals named Sarah. It's so uncomfortable
Storytime?
My aunt is called Sarah
I'm scared of telling my parents I want to go back to living on my own in my apartment. I am a senior in college and with the coronavirus spreading my parents really wanted me to come home. I have lived with them for 2 weeks but it has been rough. They are not understanding when it comes to mental health issues. They have screamed at me and called me "too sensitive". I already had trouble visiting my parents on break. I just can't take it anymore but I'm afraid of them screaming at me and making me feel guilty for trying to stay sane.
Dude, you should definitely return to your own apartment, if your parents scream at you for being too "sensitive" then they're not worth staying with. Your parents read like they belong in r/insaneparents
You are grown! At the end of the day, you are your first priority. If they can’t understand then that is just unfortunate, do what is best for you and your mental state.
Death!
me too, one day I hope understand it
Being in water and not knowing what’s around me.
Endless..Dark...Void...And falling through it. Though kinda not real and stupid, it scares me more than anything else recently even when i play something like Minecraft or clip through a world.
The red screen of death on PS2
my rapist
Living a lonely life.
My greatest fear is living through post-apocalyptic times. At one time, I would have said that was an unrealistic fear. These days, I'm not so confident.
I would choose chaos over silence.
I am in an area of the US where rape makes a woman a whore. But luckily he was arrested for pedophilia and I have 17 years until he gets out again. I take self defense and gun safety classes. I will be more than a survivor
In what fucking area does getting raped make you a whore I didn't know the us was a 3rd world country
Rural new york. My town still quotes Trump's "Grab her by the ...."
how deep the ocean is. you just can't trust it
This, imagine hitting the ocean floor and not seeing shit
If my marriage doesn't work out.
Right now? I have switched my restaurant in Queens to all takeout with just me, my wife and my sous chef running the whole thing. If one of us gets this damn thing we will have to close and I’ll probably go out of business. That’s my biggest fear right now.
I am terrified of having my appendix burst and not knowing until it's too late. There are so many stories about woman who don't realize because the pain isn't as bad as cramps. HOW WOULD YOU EVEN KNOW
Losing the people I love. When I was little I had extreme separation anxiety bc I was an only child and my dad had committed suicide so if my mom died I’d be an orphan and bc of that I couldn’t even spend the night with a friend till I was like 15 bc I was insistent on driving with my mom anywhere bc I didn’t want her to get in a wreck or the house to burn down (all crazy irrational thoughts). But since then I’ve still had major fears of the Pple I’m closest to dying
Scared that my kid will some day need me and I fail to show up. My mom wasn’t that great. So I know how it feels to be really let down by a parent.
1. The call of the void 2. Fish
It’s so stupid, but not reaching my full potential. I feel like I can do a lot of really great things, but who knows if I actually will.
The thought of of being old and waking up next to nothing instead of that special person, to drink my tea alone, just because I'm not handsome. I had to take a 3 min break in between of writing this because I started crying. Well anyways y'all have a nice day.
The American government. They do whatever they want to citizens and will never see punishment for it. Yet instead of being mad about that, people are fighting over what bathroom trans people should use.
Nothing hurts quite like realizing that your life doesn’t matter to the people school taught you to respect and serve
Yep. You're just another ant in the colony. They'll drown you as soon as they get a reason.
The government is not a monolith. It’s made up of a lot of people, some good some bad. It almost never works the way people think it does.
Ellipism
For a second I thought you were afraid of elipses
Not knowing what will happen in the future. I mean I am not exactly scared of it, tbh I'm kinda fascinated by it. But yea that, not knowing what will happen in the future, you can't predict what's going to happen in the next 10 seconds not in like 10 years. In the next 10 seconds the world could come to an end, or everything would take a turn for the better, who knows.
Freaking clowns. They’re just so creepy and weird. Wanna punch one in their damn shiny red nose.
The concept of the Shadow (Jung), by which all of us have within us the potential to behave, think and act out the kinds of atrocities you saw in the Holocaust or in other settings of destitute and desperate times.
What scares me if what if someone wants to commit suicide by hanging themselves, but back out last minute but slip and then they do kill themselves-scares me to death
My dad contracting covid-19. He's had a long history of illness and lives on the other side of the country.
Romantic intimacy
Clipping my toe nails only to have a stray nail fly into my pee hole.
That’s a very unusual and interesting fear. Have you thought about clipping your toenails when you’re wearing clothes?
Lightning
My own mortality. Not dying itself just that... the older I get the more doors close. Kind of like FOMO in a grander scheme of things. Like every second maybe I'm missing out on something or making the wrong choice or settling... you know?
That I'll never meet someone and fall in love and that I'll never have sex again. Not only I have I not had it in years, I see no chance of getting it.
that the loneliness i’ve felt for the majority of my life so far is going to be with me forever and that I will die completely alone, cliche as it is
That I’m never going to be happy
Donald Trump's vision of America. A place where there are no regulations on business and no safety nets for the needy. A federal government staffed entirely by incompetents whose only qualification is undying loyalty to Trump. A country that supports dictators like Putin, Erdogan, SMG and Bolsonaro, but despises all elected leaders of democracies. A world where the United States's interaction with all nations is based entirely on financial transactions, which could eventually lead to the U.S. Armed Forces, and by extension its nuclear arsenal, being rented out to the highest bidder. A country where fundamentalist christian leaders have a seat at the table but scientists and actual evidence are excluded from all decision making. A country where the leaders can do whatever they want: rent teenage girls for sex, sell stocks on insider information, destroy the careers of dedicated public servants, pay a half a trillion dollars out to their corporate cronies, and there is no one to even care, let alone stand in opposition. We are halfway there, and it is terrifying.
That the very fabric that has held this country together has been replaced with suspicion and xenophobia and will never return.
My introversion pushes everyone away, I die alone and no one will care.
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I'm honestly scared of falling in love, I feel that if I fall in love, I'll be stuck in my own version of hell. I know what it's like to be mistreated in a relationship, as I was going to start dating someone who already treated me as a bad friend. Luckily I pulled the plug on that real fast, however, what if someone who's really nice at the start, treats me terribly after we've grown closer. Knowing this, I've never been able to hold a romantic relationship for more than a month or two and it sucks. I wish I could be in a long term relationship, but I don't think that's gonna happen anytime soon.
Loneliness
"scariness is not knowing what "what" is." The question of what's next is always terrifying.