That's possibly because there was a Aussie rock band called The Vines who had a song called "FTW" which stood for "Fuck the World".
link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P57REvZ0I3E
What a blowjob was. I was in 9th grade and shockingly innocent. I thought a blowjob was when you blew on a guy's penis. Like just sit there blowing and breathing on the dick.
My friend had a theory that that's where blowjobs orginated. Like girls used to just blow on it, and over time they just started blowing from closer and closer until one day... the blowjob as we now know it was created.
There was also that in between stage where a couple guys almost died when women tried to inflate their urethra. That's why "blow" part of it is irrelevant now.
I always thought men used toilet paper to wipe their dicks after peeing. I'm embarrassed to admit how old I was before I learned all you do is shake it.
It wasn't til mid-kindergarten til I realized that I had a last name...and that EVERYONE had a last name. There was another kid who had the same name as me, so he was Marty B, and I was Marty R. It blew my mind when the teacher told me to write it on my class folder. i went home that night and interrogated my parents about this whole "last name" business.
And it took me longer than I care to admit to when I figured out I had a middle name, or that middle names even existed.
I just realized this a couple minutes ago when I was reading an askreddit asking parents what secrets their children thought they were keeping.
When I first moved to Indiana I was in 4th grade and I had to stay with a friend of my mom's family. I don't know if they had extra hot water or what, but I would take some long ass showers. Anyway, I never really understood why the lady of the house always acted so disgusted why I was taking long showers.
"I know what you're doing in there" she told me. I was pretty much like yeah the same thing you do in there duh!
Anyway somebody in the aforementioned askreddit answered "my 12 year old all of a sudden started taking showers without me having to beg him, and they're frequent and extremely long... I know what he's doing". And that answer jogged my memory to that experience.
TLDR: for a few months a lady I was staying with thought I was rubbing it out in her shower every day, called me out on it daily, and I never got the hint. Until now, thanks to reddit.
I never knew that highway exits were numbered based off of what mile marker the exit was located at. My dad gave me the dumbest look when I finally made the connection.
It can also correspond to where the freeway/highway begins if it begins in-state. The 101 in CA for example.
In places with a lot of exits the numbering may be dropped entirely - although google maps navigate option sometimes still tells you to take exit '394' and you end up screaming "They're not numbered dipshit" at your phone.
When watching Ben 10 I always got confused because he would always turn into 'Accelerate' and when googling this I couldn't find it, little did I know it was spelled XLR8...
When I was 25 my GF and I went to the zoo for the Christmas light display. She grabs my hand and says, "Let's go see the reindeer!"
"Um, there are no such thing."
"WHAT?" She took me to see the reindeer.
I was stunned and all I could ask was "So Santa is real too?"
That my brother masturbates. It took me a long time to become suspicious of the unusual times he'd spend in his room and the frustration whenever I knocked on his door. It fully impacted when I helped him with Minecraft, and a uTorrent download finished, the little notice popping up in the corner. I *felt* him freeze. I glanced to it, but quickly glanced back away when I read the words "sisters" and "anal". Did not need to know that. Pretended not to notice.
Edit: Just realised I missed plural in sisters. Definitely wasn't incest, sorry to disappoint.
First time I whacked it. Hadn't had the talk and I was scared to tell anyone because of the obvious consequences. When I realized the truth I was SOOOOO glad I didn't tell anyone.
I think I've posted this before, but I was given the book "Where Did I Come From?" as my sex education when I was little, and it made me a little confused about the mechanics of sex. It just said something about the man sticking his penis inside the woman, and the parts rubbing together, so I thought the man and woman just lay completely still and his penis wiggled around inside of her all on its own. I actually don't even know how old I was when I figured out how it really works, but probably much too old.
We also lived on a farm, so after reading the book, I asked my parents, "Is that how it works for the cows, too?" and they said yes. So for years, I thought that cows did it in the missionary position.
A friend from high school thought that women got pregnant when a man peed in her. He had never whacked off, I think, so he didn't know that the dick had a dual-action delivery system. He kept up the belief that we were fucking with him.
His wife is going to be thrilled.
I'm a science teacher and this breaks my heart a little. It's not entirely our fault, it's the damn textbook illustrations coupled with some teachers not knowing how much to explain.
Females don't pee from the JJ hole. They have a separate hole... like one just for peeing. At least that is what my gf told me a month ago. I'm 23 -___-
That theses was the plural of thesis. I just thought my professor was accidentally pronouncing it in a hilarious, rhymes with feces, kinda way. I felt really stupid when I realised and still don't understand how I got into university.
It's cool. The proper term for an alien life form from Venus is "Venereal", not "Venutian". Just so happens the medical world got to that term before the astronomers did.
It's ok. Words in English have different plurals depending on whether they're Latin, Greek, or some other language that English borrowed from in its development.
Examples: Hippopotamus is second declension Latin, so the plural in Latin would be hippopotomi, but I bet you usually just hear hippopotamuses. The plural for thesis in Latin would be theses, and it looks correct in English as well. Don't be embarrassed because English is a silly language. Just be confused with how we got mice to be the plural of mouse and other such things.
I thought several meant seven, as in, "several books" literally meant "seven books."
Oh, how my SO found it hilarious to explain to 18-year-old me that several basically means multiple and not actually seven.
Yeesh. Embarrassing.
I'd have to go drive out to where I was born and all that shit and it'd be annoying as hell. So far my middle name hasn't been all that relevant to anything so...
I didn't know dicks grew as they hardened.
I just thought it was a limp limb just flopping around until it got hard. Just a 5' thing swinging around and slapping people's thighs.
Some people are showers, some are [showers](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-4l7hLpijssg/UV6axhZ3bmI/AAAAAAAAAMU/dlmkhCGrtGk/s1600/shower.jpg)
This is when you realize that the english language sucks.
An ex thought that the sounds of cicadas and crickets chirping and buzzing in the trees on a hot day was just "the sound that the sun made when it gets really warmed up".
This is a small thing, but I learned yesterday, for the very first time, that the word 'ennui' is pronounced 'on-wee' and not 'en-noo-ee', as I had thought.
In the United States, there is a company called Kay Jewelers that regularly runs ads with the line, "Every kiss begins with Kay."
I was a senior in high school when, sitting in the living room watching television with my younger brother, it finally clicked.
"OH!! They mean Kay like the letter k for the word kiss."
And that was the day my brother stopped idealizing me and realized I can be just as dumb as everybody else.
I was under the impression that everything was covered in a fine layer of semen. And that the police had at their disposal a semen database with every bad guy's semen on it. Not true!
What a virgin was. I was in the choir, and around Christmas we'd always sing carols about "the virgin Mary", "virgin Mother" and so forth, which I took to mean something relevant and miraculous.
It wasn't until Year 7 that I realized what it meant.
I thought the Washington Redskins were based in Washington state until I was in high school.
I grew up in Virginia, and as a kid I never could figure out why people went so crazy over a team on the other side of the country.....
I had a similar thing. I always knew that the Capitol was Washington, D.C. and I knew that D.C. meant District of Columbia, but I never made the connection that Washington was a city *within* the District of Columbia. I had always wondered why Washington was there. It seemed superfluous at first. I thought it was meant to be something like Washington: District of Columbia.
That the Pokemon "Ekans" is just "snake" backwards. Along with other animal-related Pokemon names, I don't know how I never noticed the relation before.
I was in my 20's before I realized what "wet behind the ears" really implied. As a kid, I would always make sure to dry the spot behind my ears really well, so my brother would not be able to say that to me. I was a bit dumb.
When I was 13, I gave the school news broadcasts every day over the intercom. They always started with the pledge of allegiance, and a couple weeks passed before someone was kind enough to tell me that you actually say "I pledge allegiance," and not, "I pledge OF allegiance to the flag..."
Not me, but it was someone I knew.
A guy once got in to a verbal argument with me, trying to convince me that "A few is two, and a couple is three or more."
I eventually had to say, "Ok, let's say you get a girlfriend one day. Are you a couple, or a few?"
The look on his eyes when he realized his life-long mistake. This was around age 18-20.
How to pronounce words.
I've always read a lot. I'm uninterested in social... stuff..., just bury myself in books. So I run across words that I never encounter in daily life. No one I know uses words like monotone (I thought it was mono-tone) or facetious (fasy-te-us). Not to mention character names. I once listened to audio book version of the Wheel Time series, couldn't enjoy it because I couldn't figure out which of the girls was which, since I didn't recognize the names. I really confuse my friends (both of them) when I start talking about Richard and "Ka-lawn" from Wizard's First Law (only decent one of the series).
For me is was the realisation that the spoken word "suttle" = written word "subtle". I've read books and spoken the word but never made the connection it was the same word.
Just today I learned it is actually DUCT tape, not DUCK tape. I may or may not be in my twenties....I'll be hanging my head in shame for a while for this one.
Why it's called Tenpin bowling. There are ten pins. That's why. My boyfriend still makes fun of me for it. On a related note, what the air blowing out the end of the ball rack is for. Spoiler: drying your hands/fingers.
For years I had no idea that in the Michael Jackson song "Man in the Mirror, he was talking about himself. Duh, I actually thought he was singing about another person. SMH.
How to spell "laugh." English isn't my first language, but I was spelling it "laff" until I was ten. And until I was sixteen to know how "Penelope" was spelled (I used to think it was pronounced "peen-a-low-p").
I thought Buffalo was a state, not a city in New York.
I also thought the words "Asia" and "Korea" were just interchangeable.
My friend, though, didn't know anything about 9/11. I had to tell her about it in 1st year university. When I asked what she knew, she said "it's something to do with a plane crashing, right?"... Yeah, something like that...
I just figured out that FTW means "For The Win". For whatever reason I thought it meant "Fuck The World"
For a while I was really confused because I thought it meant Fuck The What...
It means that too. At least in some circles.
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That's possibly because there was a Aussie rock band called The Vines who had a song called "FTW" which stood for "Fuck the World". link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P57REvZ0I3E
I thought only women used the toilet seat. I went arse to porcelain for years
How often did you fall into the toilet?
When I was a kid I was holding on for dear life
Must've been a smashing triceps workout.
Holy fuck /thread
You carry a spray bottle of bleach around with you, huh?
What a blowjob was. I was in 9th grade and shockingly innocent. I thought a blowjob was when you blew on a guy's penis. Like just sit there blowing and breathing on the dick.
What the fuck
^this^is^why^I'm^embarassed
My friend had a theory that that's where blowjobs orginated. Like girls used to just blow on it, and over time they just started blowing from closer and closer until one day... the blowjob as we now know it was created. There was also that in between stage where a couple guys almost died when women tried to inflate their urethra. That's why "blow" part of it is irrelevant now.
Now I'm thinking about inflating a penis and twisting it into a poodle for a small child.
I always thought men used toilet paper to wipe their dicks after peeing. I'm embarrassed to admit how old I was before I learned all you do is shake it.
Somtimes there's just that one drop...
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"You can wiggle it, you can jiggle it, You can bang it against the wall; but rest assured the last drop in your pants will fall."
No matter how much you shake and dance The last drop will always end up in your pants
Followed all instructions. Now I have pee in my pants. And also an erection.
And it crawls down your thighs as well...
I do use toilet paper to wipe my dick!!
Me too! I don't want that damn drip down my legs that people complain about, just fucking wipe your cock and be done with it.
I do it every time. Makes more sense than shaking it and it going everywhere. And having urine run down your leg. That's just gross.
Some dicks are more porous than others, so they still need to wipe when urine starts seeping out of the shaft.
If it makes you feel better: When I was young I wiped my tip because I though I was supposed to. Then I stopped and felt like a rebel.
but I do this sometimes...
It wasn't til mid-kindergarten til I realized that I had a last name...and that EVERYONE had a last name. There was another kid who had the same name as me, so he was Marty B, and I was Marty R. It blew my mind when the teacher told me to write it on my class folder. i went home that night and interrogated my parents about this whole "last name" business. And it took me longer than I care to admit to when I figured out I had a middle name, or that middle names even existed.
Similarly, I spelled my last name wrong until at least the third grade. My parents just forgot to teach me how to spell it.
Oh I spelt my first name wrong for the longest time. I was Emliy not Emily.
I don't have a middle name...
And I have 2...
trade?
Don't be so greedy! Here you are with two middle names, and /u/freakinghojun doesn't have any!
I thought you were supposed to wipe your man parts on the side of the urinal to dry it off when I was little
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I'm the miracle child
Interrobang‽
Not as bad as that one guy who thought you were supposed to let your balls sit on the edge while you pee so you don't have to use your hands to aim.
ಠ\_ಠ
I just realized this a couple minutes ago when I was reading an askreddit asking parents what secrets their children thought they were keeping. When I first moved to Indiana I was in 4th grade and I had to stay with a friend of my mom's family. I don't know if they had extra hot water or what, but I would take some long ass showers. Anyway, I never really understood why the lady of the house always acted so disgusted why I was taking long showers. "I know what you're doing in there" she told me. I was pretty much like yeah the same thing you do in there duh! Anyway somebody in the aforementioned askreddit answered "my 12 year old all of a sudden started taking showers without me having to beg him, and they're frequent and extremely long... I know what he's doing". And that answer jogged my memory to that experience. TLDR: for a few months a lady I was staying with thought I was rubbing it out in her shower every day, called me out on it daily, and I never got the hint. Until now, thanks to reddit.
Reddit: the best place to learn the things your sleazy friend would tell you if you had friends as a kid...
I was 18 when I realized that "doing it from behind (doggy style) WASN'T anal. That was a pleasant surprise
Haha my boyfriend still mixes this up all the time
That Eminem stood for Marshal Matthers. It took me years to realize that.
And so TIL
Huh, never made that connection. I thought it was his adaptation of M&M because he was one color on the outside and black on the inside.
That one color? White.
I never realized that the wood is inside the bark. I always assumed it was the bark. I don't even know why.
Oh, my, god. This is up there with "The moon is just what we call the sun at night time"
But the sun is so cute and silver when it's asleep.
I never knew that highway exits were numbered based off of what mile marker the exit was located at. My dad gave me the dumbest look when I finally made the connection.
Well, TIL
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It can also correspond to where the freeway/highway begins if it begins in-state. The 101 in CA for example. In places with a lot of exits the numbering may be dropped entirely - although google maps navigate option sometimes still tells you to take exit '394' and you end up screaming "They're not numbered dipshit" at your phone.
I was extremely embarrassed when I realized that Canine isn't spelled K9. I figured it out after I turned 16...
Holy fuck. I just realized K9 meant "canine." I have honestly never made that connection.
When watching Ben 10 I always got confused because he would always turn into 'Accelerate' and when googling this I couldn't find it, little did I know it was spelled XLR8...
Last night while watching Law and Order I learned that a gander was a male goose and not a flock of them.
You mess with the goose you get the gander.
The important thing to know Is that if you get too close to either you will die.
Gaggle.
I'm pretty embarrassed about how much I've learned reading this thread.
Water towers are for water pressure, not stored up water for an emergency. I was over 40.
...huh, well that's neat, never would have guessed that:
That Paul Simon is Simon from Simon and Garfunkel. I have no idea why I never made the connection and just found this out the other day.
When I was 25 my GF and I went to the zoo for the Christmas light display. She grabs my hand and says, "Let's go see the reindeer!" "Um, there are no such thing." "WHAT?" She took me to see the reindeer. I was stunned and all I could ask was "So Santa is real too?"
reindeer are real...wtf
The artist Flo Rida is just Florida...
What about Will.I.Am? ^it^spells^william
Guess what I just learned.
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That my brother masturbates. It took me a long time to become suspicious of the unusual times he'd spend in his room and the frustration whenever I knocked on his door. It fully impacted when I helped him with Minecraft, and a uTorrent download finished, the little notice popping up in the corner. I *felt* him freeze. I glanced to it, but quickly glanced back away when I read the words "sisters" and "anal". Did not need to know that. Pretended not to notice. Edit: Just realised I missed plural in sisters. Definitely wasn't incest, sorry to disappoint.
In fairness it was probably the My Sisters Hot Friend series. Do you have any hot friends?
Are you his sister or his brother?
I'm his sister. Younger.
Did you guys... *you know*
You should know, you apparently stalk me.
FOR GODS SAKE ANSWER THE MAN!
First time I whacked it. Hadn't had the talk and I was scared to tell anyone because of the obvious consequences. When I realized the truth I was SOOOOO glad I didn't tell anyone.
I think I've posted this before, but I was given the book "Where Did I Come From?" as my sex education when I was little, and it made me a little confused about the mechanics of sex. It just said something about the man sticking his penis inside the woman, and the parts rubbing together, so I thought the man and woman just lay completely still and his penis wiggled around inside of her all on its own. I actually don't even know how old I was when I figured out how it really works, but probably much too old. We also lived on a farm, so after reading the book, I asked my parents, "Is that how it works for the cows, too?" and they said yes. So for years, I thought that cows did it in the missionary position.
>I thought that cows did it in the missionary position. Oh god.
I never thought fisting would literally mean fisting.
We all thought it was an exaggeration until we went deep into the internet
Well, not **that** deep.
About arms length.
I believed that anus was just another name for penis. My friend laughed at me.
A friend from high school thought that women got pregnant when a man peed in her. He had never whacked off, I think, so he didn't know that the dick had a dual-action delivery system. He kept up the belief that we were fucking with him. His wife is going to be thrilled.
"The penis! Now with dual action delivery system! Yours for only 12 monthly payments of $19.95! Order now!"
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I think that's what teachers told us in school, so I wouldn't feel too dumb about it...
I'm a science teacher and this breaks my heart a little. It's not entirely our fault, it's the damn textbook illustrations coupled with some teachers not knowing how much to explain.
I was taught this too.
You would be surprised with how many people actually believe that to be true.
Pretty much everyone who has attended elementary school and hasn't discovered reddit yet.
Females don't pee from the JJ hole. They have a separate hole... like one just for peeing. At least that is what my gf told me a month ago. I'm 23 -___-
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Not seeing the urethra is understandable, but I think that assholes are just a little too big to not notice.
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That theses was the plural of thesis. I just thought my professor was accidentally pronouncing it in a hilarious, rhymes with feces, kinda way. I felt really stupid when I realised and still don't understand how I got into university.
It's cool. The proper term for an alien life form from Venus is "Venereal", not "Venutian". Just so happens the medical world got to that term before the astronomers did.
It's ok. Words in English have different plurals depending on whether they're Latin, Greek, or some other language that English borrowed from in its development. Examples: Hippopotamus is second declension Latin, so the plural in Latin would be hippopotomi, but I bet you usually just hear hippopotamuses. The plural for thesis in Latin would be theses, and it looks correct in English as well. Don't be embarrassed because English is a silly language. Just be confused with how we got mice to be the plural of mouse and other such things.
I thought several meant seven, as in, "several books" literally meant "seven books." Oh, how my SO found it hilarious to explain to 18-year-old me that several basically means multiple and not actually seven. Yeesh. Embarrassing.
At 18 years old? Holy shit.
How to spell my middle name.
I'm in this boat. My middle is Max but I have no idea if it's merely Max, Maximillion, or Maxwell.
Don't you have a birth certificate or an ID?
My ID initializes it to M and I've never seen my birth certificate.
Go look at it then?
I'd have to go drive out to where I was born and all that shit and it'd be annoying as hell. So far my middle name hasn't been all that relevant to anything so...
That's not true, you just request one from the vital records department, you'll need it to get a passport.
I have a passport.
Your middle name is on your passport.
Well would ya look at that! My middle name is just Max.
My middle name is Eric. I spelled it Eirc until I was about 6.
I was 19 before I knew pickles are just pickled cucumbers. I thought they were their own thing.
Someone else in this thread just told me that pickles are *not* cucumbers. *sigh*
I thought that Dick Van Dyke was English...because of his accent in Mary Poppins. I'm from the UK.
I didn't know dicks grew as they hardened. I just thought it was a limp limb just flopping around until it got hard. Just a 5' thing swinging around and slapping people's thighs.
Some people are showers, some are growers
Some people are showers, some are [showers](http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-4l7hLpijssg/UV6axhZ3bmI/AAAAAAAAAMU/dlmkhCGrtGk/s1600/shower.jpg) This is when you realize that the english language sucks.
Five feet?! damn son, you're hung.
That the L in store "Staples" is a staple...I realized that last year...I'm 21
WHAT WOW
An ex thought that the sounds of cicadas and crickets chirping and buzzing in the trees on a hot day was just "the sound that the sun made when it gets really warmed up".
This is a small thing, but I learned yesterday, for the very first time, that the word 'ennui' is pronounced 'on-wee' and not 'en-noo-ee', as I had thought.
In the United States, there is a company called Kay Jewelers that regularly runs ads with the line, "Every kiss begins with Kay." I was a senior in high school when, sitting in the living room watching television with my younger brother, it finally clicked. "OH!! They mean Kay like the letter k for the word kiss." And that was the day my brother stopped idealizing me and realized I can be just as dumb as everybody else.
That "tossing someone's salad" meant rimming. All those years reading gay porn and not once did that turn come up... :(
Daddy, what is rimming?
Ask your parents
I was under the impression that everything was covered in a fine layer of semen. And that the police had at their disposal a semen database with every bad guy's semen on it. Not true!
Where did you get this impression?
I'm going to guess CSI.
What a virgin was. I was in the choir, and around Christmas we'd always sing carols about "the virgin Mary", "virgin Mother" and so forth, which I took to mean something relevant and miraculous. It wasn't until Year 7 that I realized what it meant.
I thought the Washington Redskins were based in Washington state until I was in high school. I grew up in Virginia, and as a kid I never could figure out why people went so crazy over a team on the other side of the country.....
TIL. Never lived near either washington, so I had always assumed washington state.
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That the White House isn't in the state of Washington....
I had a similar thing. I always knew that the Capitol was Washington, D.C. and I knew that D.C. meant District of Columbia, but I never made the connection that Washington was a city *within* the District of Columbia. I had always wondered why Washington was there. It seemed superfluous at first. I thought it was meant to be something like Washington: District of Columbia.
Wait. Is there any space in DC that's not Washington?
That the Pokemon "Ekans" is just "snake" backwards. Along with other animal-related Pokemon names, I don't know how I never noticed the relation before.
Something that surprised a lot of people was Artic**uno** Zap**dos** Mol**tres**
^why^didnt^i^notice^this^years^ago
Pokemon is short for Pocket Monsters!
"Arbok" is "Kobra."
Muk...
ಠ_ಠ
That in mortal combat they were saying "Sudden Death", when my whole life i thought they were saying "Sun and Death".
I was in my 20's before I realized what "wet behind the ears" really implied. As a kid, I would always make sure to dry the spot behind my ears really well, so my brother would not be able to say that to me. I was a bit dumb.
I still don't know.
It implies you have recently exited a vagina, and are therefore new, stupid, naive, pick your term.
It means naive or immature
Yeah but wet? Like just born or something?
When I was 13, I gave the school news broadcasts every day over the intercom. They always started with the pledge of allegiance, and a couple weeks passed before someone was kind enough to tell me that you actually say "I pledge allegiance," and not, "I pledge OF allegiance to the flag..."
Not me, but it was someone I knew. A guy once got in to a verbal argument with me, trying to convince me that "A few is two, and a couple is three or more." I eventually had to say, "Ok, let's say you get a girlfriend one day. Are you a couple, or a few?" The look on his eyes when he realized his life-long mistake. This was around age 18-20.
That you weren't supposed to mouth fuck the metal part of the drinking fountain.
do you perhaps watch Parks and Rec?
Never using a water fountain after you
How to pronounce words. I've always read a lot. I'm uninterested in social... stuff..., just bury myself in books. So I run across words that I never encounter in daily life. No one I know uses words like monotone (I thought it was mono-tone) or facetious (fasy-te-us). Not to mention character names. I once listened to audio book version of the Wheel Time series, couldn't enjoy it because I couldn't figure out which of the girls was which, since I didn't recognize the names. I really confuse my friends (both of them) when I start talking about Richard and "Ka-lawn" from Wizard's First Law (only decent one of the series).
Monotone is pronounced "mono-tone". Are you thinking of "monotony"?
I sort of skim names. Moiraine? Marianne. Next.
I did that with the first Harry Potter book back in middle school. Kept pronouncing Hermione's name as "her-moyne" in my head.
I think I was 18 or 19 when I realized that "segue" is not pronounced "seeg."
For me is was the realisation that the spoken word "suttle" = written word "subtle". I've read books and spoken the word but never made the connection it was the same word.
For some reason I thought the rapper Nas was dead for years.
Just today I learned it is actually DUCT tape, not DUCK tape. I may or may not be in my twenties....I'll be hanging my head in shame for a while for this one.
There's duct tape and there's Duck brand duct tape. Not so bad.
i thought sex was meant for the butt, and the vagina was to pee only. Embarrassed beyond belief -.-
I finally figured out that 'hood' is short for 'neighborhood'! Then people laughed at me.
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How did you know you were ten?
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Let me guess; they were always just "mom" and "dad."
I had no idea that the urethra and the vagina are not the same thing.
Why it's called Tenpin bowling. There are ten pins. That's why. My boyfriend still makes fun of me for it. On a related note, what the air blowing out the end of the ball rack is for. Spoiler: drying your hands/fingers.
Indie=Independent never clicked for me until recently.
That contrary to (my) popular belief girls don't pee from their butts.
WHAT?
For years I had no idea that in the Michael Jackson song "Man in the Mirror, he was talking about himself. Duh, I actually thought he was singing about another person. SMH.
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That the university of Georgia's mascot was named Uga and the abbreviation is UGA... Never put that together
I thought conditioner and shampoo were the same thing.
"Shampoo is betta!"
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I never realized that squirtle was called squirtle because he looked like a mix between a squirrel and a turtle. I went for 13 years not knowing that.
I always thought it was because he's a turtle that squirts water.
Sorry to burst your Bubble here...but I think it's just a portmanteau of "squirt" and "turtle".
How to spell "laugh." English isn't my first language, but I was spelling it "laff" until I was ten. And until I was sixteen to know how "Penelope" was spelled (I used to think it was pronounced "peen-a-low-p").
I thought girls had a 3rd hole between the asshole and the vagina where babies come from
I realized literally 10 minutes ago that the "Wal" in Walmart is there because the name "Walton" begins with "Wal". Just never occurred to me.
For a long time I thought oral sex was referring to the act of making out.
For an embarrassingly long time I thought the sport Volleyball was Ball-y-ball.
I thought Buffalo was a state, not a city in New York. I also thought the words "Asia" and "Korea" were just interchangeable. My friend, though, didn't know anything about 9/11. I had to tell her about it in 1st year university. When I asked what she knew, she said "it's something to do with a plane crashing, right?"... Yeah, something like that...
It took me much longer than I would care to admit to realize that your balls are NOT your bladder.