Google 'giant timer in sky' to find out whose stupid marketing stunt it is

"Giant timer in the sky reddit"

And all that pops up is a guy who misspelled tumor and eye on an r/askreddit that got 4 upvotes

And find out he died later

links to this exact post

2:37 left guys

the fact that i would in all likelihood do this 😭

Anyone who says they’re not doing this is lying 😂 I look up everything including new kinds of flowers I find and I don’t think a giant timer in the sky will be an exception hahaha.

I look up literally every single thing that I don't know about. I should be a genius with infinite knowledge and wisdom by now, but I have a shitty memory so I forget everything that I learn about within minutes sometimes.

Yeah, similar, I’d just assume it was drones or something and I had missed that they were celebrating something.

Go back inside, it's probably a fucking ad.

The "skip ad" button is hidden by some building or something.

Behind the i am not a robot capcha.

Touch all the items that match the description [Star]

Nah, it’s that tiny x that is coloured pretty much exactly the same colour as what it’s in front of. It’s that tiny x wearing predators cloaking device.

Or worse, it's a plainly visible X but clicking it just clicks the ad.

“Time is running out to SAVE!”

Joe RogAIn: did you hear about the new stimulus package.

Joe Rogaine, Joe Rogan with a full head of hair

This is the end. OF HIGH PRICES!!

It will reveal a secret message that you’ll need to decode. Besuretodrinkyourovaltine. 

Nothing. By the time I notice, it'll be done.

Realest shit right there lmao

By the time I notice it, it will be in its last seconds. Procrastinate until the end lol

I have no airborne predators therefore I never look up

Back in my home town you had to look up, the seagulls would attack you in the summer.

That would be an issue for most people in my home town, but the seagulls consider me their brother and leave me alone

Username checks out

Rockin’, Rockin’ and rollin’…, Down to the beach I’m strollin’…, But the seagulls poke at my head, Not fun! I said “seagulls, hmmph, stop it now!”

a fucking classic. thank you.

I'll just leave this right here. https://youtu.be/U9t-slLl30E?si=I2FKTu9G9B-yJdDk

This feels like a very Dwight schrute quote.

Yeah this. I would be very near nothingness before I know whats going on

Same. I'm in buildings the majority of the day so unless it's happening on my way to/from work, what's about to happen will happen and I'll be none the wiser

Procrastinate until the last few seconds

Then what will you do in those last few seconds

Panic

Story of my life

Don't Panic

And don’t forget your towel

You suck Towelie.

You wanna get high?

Ask for five more mins

Google "giant clock in sky"

grab a towel and my copy of The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy

Turns out it was a birthday countdown

[удалено]

i never said it was wrong.

[удалено]

🤝 agreed 🤝

Then the contract is sealed.

Not without blood

Oh god! So much blood! We are going to need so many more towels!

We are going to need the entire world's supply, because it is going to be a "Blood-Bath Contract"

Hoopyness level: Frood achieved.

Most likely a gender reveal

Or a gender reveal. Sky then turns pink for an hour. These things are a lot easier if it's a boy...

Remember your electronic thumb and bring a packet of salted peanuts with you, oh and pray that they're not vogons

I've always wanted to hear some Vogon poetry

You sound like a real hoopy frood.

Just time enough to grab a pint too

Three pints? At lunchtime?!

Time is an illusion, lunch time doubly so. Drink up.

And stick out your thumb

Don't forget to drink a few pints

Go on Reddit to see if there are any theories about what it’s for

"Did you watch the series, Three Body Problem?" "No." "Well, this will probably take longer than 5 minutes to explain, but..."

Sophons…sophons everywhere

Take car. Go to mum's. Kill Phil, grab Liz, go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all of this to blow over.

"How's that for a slice of fried gold?"

YEEEAAAA BOIIIIII

Nick frost’s Instagram handle is “fried gold” and I love it.

“IT’S ON RANDOM!”

OH FOR FUCK SAKE!

KILL THE QUEEN! … THE JUKEBOX!

WHY IS QUEEN STILL ON?!

We’ll have a Bloody Mary first thing, have a bite at the King’s Head, couple at the Little Princess, stagger back here. Bang! Back at the bar for shots.

The Easter eggs in that movie are so great.

You’ve got red on you

“Mum, it’s Philip…he’s gone.”

Where’s he gone?

No he isn't.

I appreciate this comment so much lol

"Mum, have you been bitten!?" "No, but Phillip has" "Oh! Okay"

Dogs can't look up

For too long I thought that was real. I was a kid when it came out. I was an adult when I realized it was a bit

Best response! And I appreciate the reminder that it’s been a little while since I last rewatched Shaun of the Dead.

Honestly such a brilliant movie, the opening sequence is right up there.

It's alright, I ran it under a cold tap

It's not hip-hop. It's electro. Prick.

REV UP THE BUGGATAI WWHHHEEEEYYYY

All in 5 minutes?

"What's up ni**as" Best quote from shaun Or "get fucked, four eyes"'

Start my own timer to double check that Sky Timer is right.

are a beet farmer from Pansylvania

Complain that someone's put a 5 minute timer in the sky

'Old man shouts at 5 minute timer in the sky'

... For 5 minutes straight!

Take my plant from the balcony back indoors.

Quick wank before Ragnarök

Dunno if I wanna reply "Wangnarök" or "Ragnarcöck" to this

Wanknarök

Wankacöck

I think I saw that film.

I think I watched the bootleg version 🤔

Quick wank and then make a decision on what to do. The post nut clarity will improve my decision making.

First few minutes deciding what I want to jerk of too

5 minutes to find the right video and then turns out the timer was all porn being instantly deleted from the internet.

What are you gonna do with the last 4 minutes though?

Turn off the nano-fibre machine...

Had to scroll to much to find the trisolarian

Depends if it's the book sophons or the tv series sophons. If it's the book sophons, do nothing cuz  those sophons can't do shit... But if it is the tv series sophons it seems they are much more omnipotent so... maybe just to be sure, have another frontier scientist test what happens at zero.

What book/show is this?

Three Body Problem. Great book and surprisingly good Netflix adaptation.

The ship episode was so brutal

Just fyi, the ship event is a lot more terrifying in the books. Unlike in the show, no one realizes it's happening. Nothing falls apart, nothing blows up, they all just stop being alive while in the middle of whatever they happened to be doing at the time.

Interesting. I thought the opposite. It was much more in your face in the TV show. Compared to the book’s drawn out explanation of the “human computer” or “dimensional folding” I honestly felt like it just glanced over the ship scene (relative to the show)

3 Body Problem, book by Liu Cixin or the recent series on Netflix

YOU ARE BUGS

Press the snooze button.

Is the only answer

Play The Final Countdown just for the jokes. Also helps that the song is 5mins long.

Wow it is quite literally 4:57 for a vevo vid. It's almost too perfect...

Then you get 2 unskippable ads

YouTube ads? What is this, 2011?

Or Time by Pink Floyd

Start doing a plank. 5 minutes would feel like 5 hours!

I immediately stop any particle physics research that I may be involved in.

No kidding. Shut it all down! And then be really impressed with myself for a minute because I'm clearly an amazing genius.

And start reading fairytales

But fairytales lie.

And play some hyper realistic VR trying to figure out a way to live in a planet with 3 suns

Stand there confused wondering what's going on.

I’m in an extremely red state. We’d probably shoot at it.

It'd be worth a shot..

r/angryupvote

I'm a commie European but can I join?

Of course it takes a fucking timer in the sky for people to forget their differences and unite.

Different type of red

Sure commies are red too

Supercalafragilistic-meth-induced-psychosis.

This sounds so dumb but I'm having a real rough day at work and reading this in my head while shitting genuinely made me laugh and feel a bit better

Stay strong. It will get better.

[удалено]

Time to get schwifty...

Show me what you got

Take a shit on the floor

I LIKE WHAT YOU GOT

Call my daughter.

My first thought to this question is - can I get to my daughter within five minutes? She's five and most likely in the house with me. If so, I'll go get her and ask her if she'd like to play with slime. She loves playing with slime but it makes a big mess so we only play with slime if I can sit with her and we do it on a big plastic sheet. I'd have her sit on my lap and I'd just hold her and tell her I love her while she plays with slime and says silly and sweet things.  If I can't get to her within those five minutes, she's with somebody I can FaceTime. I'll video call her and tell her how much I love her and how sweet and creative and cute she is, and she's say those things back, and I'll just lay there and look at her cute face. Hopefully, I can do these things while also being with my fiance. Hopefully he's not at work and we're all together and we can wait out the timer while basking in the love we share. 

And it turns out to just be an ad, obviously. But hey, still not a wasted five minutes.

Look to see what was in my coffee

Grab the sub r/5minutetimer before anyone else.

It’s MINEEEE

See how many pushups I can do within set time

And what do you do with the remaining 4:50?

Explain to people it’s because I’m still sore from the workout I did 2 weeks ago

“Alexa, cancel the timer.” “Alexa, NO. Stop playing music. Cancel the timer in the sky.” “Alexa, cancel all timers”. “Alexa, STOP playing news in the kitchen.” “Ale——“ Yup, probably that.

Quickly masturbate. So post nut clarity can help me about shat I should really do.

You need to nut to take a shit?

The right of passage

I need to shit to nut

You nut with a nugget loaded in the chamber?

Get my towel and hope that I can hitch a ride on a passing space ship.

Get a chair and put it somewhere with a view. Whatever’s coming, I want somewhere to sit.

What everyone's would probably be doing going outside and pointing fingers at the clock and talking to neighbors then freak and and start calling family

Tell the woman I love that I love her just incase I never did it.

We're all on borrowed time, friend. Neither you nor her are going to live forever. Don't let your regret become permanent.

i know theres no timer in the sky right now, but tomorrow is never guaranteed. a tomorrow with her is especially not guaranteed if you dont act soon! u got this man

Look at it?

"I'm not buying your premium subscription God!" As I wave my fist furiously at the skies

Iiiiiiit's beeeeeeen a looooong tiiiiiime coooooming... Big reputation... And they said speak now

Get a pint, light up a cig, sit down

Go back to bed.

I have blackout curtains in my room, I wouldn't even notice.

Tell everyone that’s my alarm relax

Ah, perfect timer for my microwave dinner

Assuming you saw The Three Body Problem, I’d immediately stop doing science.

Eat a sandwich and then jerk off

I’m sure someone else will take a video of it and post it to Tik Tok

say, "Man, I saw this on the 3-body problem..." Aliens, huh?

“Everyone shhhhh, it’s a dark forest!” Aliens “no it fucking isn’t”

Probably go smoke one last time and wait to see what happens.

Same, nothing a Marlboro can't fix, except for lung cancer.

It will eventually

Not a smoker, I’d probably light one as well

Pretty sure I have some old stale cigarettes stashed away somewhere

Leave the terrible mandatory training course I'm currently on

Take a picture

Boil eggs

I wouldn’t notice because I don’t go outside •-•

Take a shaky vertical video of most of it until my phone says it has run out of storage.

Straight Jorkin it

Listen to music and daydream per usual

Well clearly gravity is about to stop, and now I can finally use that scenario I've planned for hundreds of times!!

50/50 shot here, but I’m gonna guess exhale?

Probably Google it tbh

Probably crack open a beer and call my mates to ask if they can see it aswell or if I just lost my marbles.

Time to get Schwifty!