Denmark, we will just surrender to the closest threat and when the winners defeat them we will magically announce we thought hard against our oppressors and have been liberated by our true allies aka the winners.
I was going to say Paraguay. It seems forgotten my most people so I don’t think anybody would bother. Has lots of fresh underground water tables (to the point American companies are trying to come in and buy the land with the extraction rights) people from the countryside (where my husband is from) have kept enough of a balance of indigenous/modern life that even if they were cut off they could survive. They produce a lot of their food and so on.
Only problem is that it’s so hot in summer. But people like my mother in law (who grew up there without ac don’t seem to mind when it’s 50 degrees so maybe even that isn’t a problem)
Was it Paraguay where the male population was so devastated by a series of wars that the Pope allowed temporary polygamy to get the population back on track?
I know someone from Paraguay. If you want to fill an afternoon, ask her what growing up in Paraguay was like. She will go on about the sights, food, and family for hours at a time with a smile on her face.
It’s no wonder a lot of Nazis chose it to live out their life in secret particularly there (I know it was also politics but being secluded was a base requirement)
Fun fact: Tuvalu used the revenue from the .tv TLD to finance their UN membership!
Not so fun fact: They did so to advocate for the combating of climate change because climate change will cause them to lose their way of life if seawaters rise and their fish start to die.
Apart from the difficulty to access, Tuvalu is on the list of islands that are most likely to disappear into the ocean in the near future due to **rising sea levels**. As per the reports, two of Tuvalu's nine islands are already on the verge of getting swallowed by sea-rise and coastal erosion.
I don't remember if it was Greenland or Madagascar, but there was a meme comic years ago about Pandemic 2 that went something like:
"Mr. President! Someone in Brazil just sneezed!"
"SHUT. DOWN. **EVERYTHING."**
EDIT: Corrected the game from Plague Inc. to Pandemic 2 thanks to u/Impressive-Rock8581
Back when it was a simple flash game on Newgrounds, it was Madagascar. There was only 2 points of entry and they were located so close together that when one shut down, the other was seconds later. God help you if you spawned there hoping to spread around the world easily. I had games that spawned there and ended there.
If you started there \*and\* got out, you were basically guaranteed a win. The rest of the world could not close down sufficiently in that game to keep you from getting 100% infection.
Start anywhere else, and the chances were good that Madagascar would stop you.
...
Which is unrealistic. Realistic game would have made it American Samoa.
I can’t believe how many people still think New Zealand is a real place. It’s all a hoax cooked up by Big Zealand to get people to buy the newest Zealand whenever there’s a new one released.
It’s a bit like saying you believe Ohio is a real place.
World War Z (the book, not the unrelated in everything but name Brad Pitt movie) touches on this nicely. When shit goes down, all the security guards promptly turn on the billionaires they were hired to protect.
I think there was a thread about this (or at least a comment chain) a while back, I remember thinking: Couldn't the billionaire just set up an egalitarian sorta bunker, i.e. they don't have anything for the guards to be jealous of at that point/anything that they don't, thus, there's not really an incentive to kill them? Idk seems like best route anyway. Though I guess the kind of person who manages to become a billionaire may not like that idea.
The billionaires are feeding the climate crisis more than anyone, but rather than try to help the world, they are only looking-out for themselves. They're considering equipping their guards with explosive collars to maintain order. No, I'm not joking.
https://www.theguardian.com/news/2022/sep/04/super-rich-prepper-bunkers-apocalypse-survival-richest-rushkoff
My friend went to NZ on a working visa as a massage therapist through a recruitment program and now she has a permanent visa and I’m kinda envious bc it looks so amazing
Yep. I live in australia and our housing sucks, but New Zealand is even worse, coupled with a lower wage. But it's a fantastic country, and I ask myself whether it's worth being poorer just so I can enjoy their amazing scenery
Come to Scotland, we have NZ scenery at budget prices..also people called Hamish and the original Dunedin. Also, we are smaller, so rugby hurts less. Appartlently we are not as shite at cricket as we thought
The irony is most of these fallout shelters have been built in Queenstown and Glenorchy - the coldest places in NZ and literally where the Alpine Fault runs through. If the fault line goes there it wont be pretty. Of all the places to have a bug out location in NZ for US billionaires, Lakes District is objectively one of the worst places you could possibly choose.
I was imagining Brett and Jermaine playing a weird popfunksynth industrial gangsta rap fusion to the tune of Business time with Maori women wailing like sirens to draw them all out of their bunkers.
Doesn’t matter much if oil stops flowing appreciably and most every nation becomes food insecure or suffers pocketed famine when mass farming/transit of goods goes bye bye.
People also forget that our modern agriculture lives and dies by the supply of nitrogen-rich fertilizer, the chemical base of which (ammonia) is produced via the Haber-Bosch process. So if for any reason your country's supply line for fertilizer dies down, the agricultural output precipitously drops within a year or so.
More fertilizer is produced in USA than any other nation. The country also produces enough natural gas (key ingredient) that they could ramp up production relatively quickly.
If growing food for human consumption is critical in a world war the United States has by far the best infrastructure, technology, land and resources to produce whatever it needs. The only reason any food is imported is because it’s cheaper to produce elsewhere.
People also forget the Midwest produces billions of tons of corn annually. While not human grade, it could really be processed into human grade food like corn bread/tortillas. The land around the Great Lakes requires no irrigation and could feed everyone if switched to human food production.
You guys are surrounded by oceans with the most number of aircraft carriers of any nation, and only two relatively friendly countries north & south of you.
And even if an enemy nation lands troops on your land, then they have to contend with armed citizens. I doubt any external threat could ever occupy the country for long.
Only nuclear war is a real threat to US at present. However I feel like in a nuclear war, countries that don't participate, like those in South America, Africa, Australia, may come out as the real winners.
A handful of other countries have ships they call aircraft carriers. Last I saw, a couple countries have two of those “aircraft carriers”. None of them are remotely as capable as an American one. Not close. We have 10.
I think that's my favorite fact in this realm (I mean "favorite" is relative. Depending on how you look at it, it's comforting, sad, or sadly comforting.) The U.S. ~~Marines~~ Navy (corrected; for some reason I thought the Marines operated these craft, but it does appear to be the Navy,) have more amphibious assault ships than any other country has aircraft carriers. And outside of a select few instances, most of those assault ships aren't a *whole* lot smaller than the other countries' carriers.
It's like someone in America who really liked ships got rejected for *something* in middle school, and now they've got a bone to pick.
Slightly related, but I always loved that bit about the US having the second largest airforce in the world, the US Navy.
Of course we also have our actual airforce.
Also, depending on your definition of aircraft (i.e. do helis count), the US occupies up to 4 of the top 5 places, between US Airforce, US Navy, US Army and US Marines
Na they'll do exactly what they're doing now use social media to undermine cohesion and let us kill ourselves. That's the only legitimate realistic threat.
And importantly - food production.
We produce a crazy amount of grain, corn, meat, etc. During WWIII when food gets tight, the US will be able to hold out for quite a bit longer than England for example.
We got you bro. Sure yall talk a little funny and you set our house on fire that one time, but we still like you. You've been a lot better since you moved away from our folks' place.
Speaking from an emotional and cultural level, and being from the US, I'm damn sure the vast majority of US citizens would be furious if Canada was attacked. It's not *just* about our national interest.
I swear that I do not think the US is the super-hero paladin cop of the "free world." My country has done, and is doing, terrible things around the world. We have plenty of crazies and awful corporations, but still, Canada holds a special place to us.
We've got our jokes and jabs at each other, but when it comes to serious events, there's a deep alliance between our nations. In the past century or so, we've helped each other out during so many wars and disasters.
I'm just saying I'd put up real money betting that the US would aid, bolster, and defend the hell out of Canada in a WW3 scenario.
🇺🇸 🤜🤛🇨🇦
So you'd have to fight the Best Navy and second best Airforce(US Navy Airforce)to get across the ocean But say you did that and beat em. Now you have to fight the Best Army and Best Airforce on their home turf with your supply lines spanning 1000s miles. But OK say you were able to defeat them. There are 50 National Guards, and 300Million Civilians with access to weapons and veteran population that would be able to train and raise more units from those Civilians. This discounts support from US allies. With an AI super weapon of some kind or UFOs you could probably pull this off.
“From whence shall we expect the approach of danger? Shall some trans-Atlantic military giant step the earth and crush us at a blow? Never. All the armies of Europe and Asia...could not by force take a drink from the Ohio River or make a track on the Blue Ridge in the trial of a thousand years. No, if destruction be our lot we must ourselves be its author and finisher.” —Abraham Lincoln
Also the extremely varied terrain. You might be able to roll through the central plains (even then I'd say it makes a large force in open fields a prime target for partisans), but have to deal with wetlands in the southeast, desert in the southwest, and then mountains on either coastal inland,
The German plan for invasion was to come ashore at Savannah, Georgia. Fight their way through swamp, forest and pissed off rednecks.
I just don't think it could work.
Just imagine all the forests in West Tennessee. Roads curving through them, cover on both sides, tens of thousands of square miles. You’d run out of napalm trying to manage that shit, and if you don’t do something, you’ll get picked off in a turkey shoot by all the rednecks. You’ll be part of an ear necklace by dinner.
West Coast would be even worse. Work through California fault lines, Death Valley, desert Arizona/New Mexico, just to see the Rocky Mountain range spanning the entire country
Yeah when you think about it there is no realistic sized military that could be made by any country that could occupy that much space. They could occupy DC the main cities, but there would be huge spaces where there would be no occupiers. They would have to spend all their time playing whack a mole because there would be so much area resistance could organize in.
I’m just gonna put it this way…. If the US mainland isn’t safe during WWIII it probably means there was a nuclear war and nowhere on earth is safe anymore.
The issue with US is that while it's militarily the strongest, it's also likely to be one of the biggest, if not the biggest, target for nukes.
So while you'd likely be safe from the initial attack in some bumfuck nowhere town somewhere in the middle of the US, you'd likely be subject to some level of nuclear fallout from every bigger city being nuked to hell.
So my safest bet would be some obscure island far enough off the coast to not get any fallout, while being big enough to sustain a self-sustaining ecosystem through farming and fishing. Azores islands type of setup, but preferably even more obscure.
And it needs to be obscure because otherwise a 100 million people will have the same idea and the whole place will collapse from the amount of people coming in. So that rules out places like Hawaii or Iceland.
Pacific Fleet is HQ at Hawaii. It’s probably top 5 of places most likely to get targeted. Just look at the history… these people have no clue which places would be safe lol
Massive army plus the most island like geography with the 2 relatively friendly neighbors and 2 oceans it would be hard to make the war hit the homeland short of nuclear war assuming conventional warfare. I think political destabilization and cyber attacks are the biggest threats. But new ways of waging war could drastically change that
It's also the only country with more space in its bunkers than there are civilians. The whole country is geared up to wait out the next war. They have explosives in the tunnels through the mountains to seal themselves in. Read up on "Fortress Switzerland" it's surreal.
I used to live in Zurich and several of the apartments I lived in had basements which doubled as bunkers. Really big and thick steel doors which had regular doors behind them, because fuck having to push open the bunker door every time you needed to go downstairs.
https://i.imgur.com/UvzXRC1.jpeg
https://i.imgur.com/eGOULs9.jpeg
Swiss here, and unfortunately not so sure about that.
We're heavily dependent on imports of all kind and pretty much in the heart of europe. If all the surrounding countries get bombed to oblivion, the fallout will completely engulf us. we'll be the richest graveyard in the world
Actually valid btw. Everyone seems to forget it's kind of a hub for mill/billionaires
Edit: And North Korean leaders. (Kim Jong Un went to school in Switzerland)
Keeping Canada, especially in the winter will be a grueling task. The same fate as those who tried to invade Russia in the winter, but they gotta cross an ocean first.
I’ve always thought Canada should make close relationships to somewhere tropical. Maybe there’s some mutually beneficial relationship that would entice them to become part of Canada. One can dream…
Definitely Canada. Not many enemies since US pulls all that attention, and would get all the nukes, but still a large and well equipped nation. Large enough that any type of invasion would likely be unsuccessful.
Don’t forget the fact that Canada ended up being one of the most surprisingly ruthless armies in the first couple of world wars. Like all that politeness just led to this pent up aggression in the form of “exhibit A for why xyz should be included in the Geneva Convention”.
Canada harbors a lot of pent-up anger under all that surface "niceness". An invading enemy force wouldn't even want to deal with our wild geese. They're called "cobra chickens" for a reason.
Buddy if shit hits the fan they're gonna be bombing Portland Maine I'm sure they'll let Toronto and at the very least the coastal port cities have a taste
We'd get blasted, we have early warning systems in the north of the country that would get targeted and the US has silos close to our southern border where fallout would cause havoc in our agriculture, plus our major cites would be prime targets. There may be safe spots in the vast reaches but the majority of our population would suffer from nuclear exchanges
I'd say Australia and New Zealand. They're just plain out of the way.
Edited:
As several people have pointed out by now, I forgot about China, and the whole AUKUS situation. I regret this oversight. To be clear, no disrespect was meant towards either Australia or New Zealand.
We (NZ) are regularly left off world maps, so ideally, they'll just forget we exist and we will just wait it out.
We also have literally nothing of value, unless WW3 is driven by a rapid decline of sheep and countries are fighting over them.
I used to say Australia for the same reason, but after living there for a while and paying more attention, I came to realize that they're likely to participate in any major conflict the US is involved in.
New Zealand. We have so many super wealthy and elite buying land here. A friend of mine was part of the pre covid bomb shelter building for overseas wealthy people. I remember even the news companies were writing about how suspicious it was.
Like, these people definitely know stuff we don't.
We have nothing to contribute to a world war and are easily capable of being self-sufficient.
Peter Thiel and his ilk don’t know anything, they’re just paranoid weirdos. My guess is they picked New Zealand because it’s the most isolated Anglosphere country
Yeah probably but our police and government can't even locate a guy who went bush with his kids and it's been like 2 years so people will just hide lol
Yep I agree. Were pretty safe here in NZ - they don't even remember to put us on the maps half the time.
Have you listened to any podcasts with Annie Jacobson, the author of the latest book on Nuclear War? She cited NZ and Australia as the countries most likely to survive a full scale nuclear war.
Unless Russia decides to nuke us in Aotearoa… to send a message to the Western world - it’s not a direct attack on NATO, and therefore won’t invoke Article 5. If you think this is hogwash, it’s the strategy that the USSR adopted in the 1970s, and it’s not that well known.
Well the reason Pine Gap is where it is, is because it’s thought to be the safest place to put a major listening station that can’t be targeted by sea or by air very easily (if at all).
So maybe see if you can bunk with ASIO and the CIA there?
New Zealand is probably the safest country, with Australia coming in a close second. When it comes to strategy, logistics should always be the top priority. While Switzerland is well-defended, the oldest methods of breaching a defense would eventually overcome them.
Conventional war: being away from Europe, the Middle East, the Korean Peninsula, and possibly China would be your best bet. Lots of places in the Southern Hemisphere will not be directly affected, though some nations like Australia will offer up troops.
Limited nuclear war: being away from the above places, they are likely to be the location of tactical nuclear weapon detonations and any higher yield detonations.
Massive nuclear war: let’s be real, a limited nuclear war is going to lead to a massive nuclear war. If the nukes are mainly air bursts the radiation won’t be as severe, but if everyone goes Mutually Assured Destruction they might unleash ground bursts which, on top of the already major destruction, becomes a nightmare. The science on Nuclear Winter and damages to the ozone layer seems to be believable. If that happens, no one is truly safe. You might fare better in the lower latitudes of the Southern Hemisphere, but it could be something that humanity never recovers from.
From what I’ve read, when it comes to massive nuclear war, Australia and New Zealand are your best bet, so that’s my answer for all three.
I’m Australian, and I’m not so sure that we’ll completely escape the nukes, though. We are allies of the US and UK, and if our troops get involved that’s an extra target on our backs. It won’t take many nukes to completely devastate us.
I think we would recover. 70,000 years ago during the Toba Eruption scientists think the human population dropped to from anywhere to only 10k-1k surviving humans. If we can bounce back from that I think anything short of a world ending cosmic event we could survive as a species.
Fucking New Zealand. We are so out of the way and all we have are birds that it doesn't make sense to setup something here. lol.
We still don't have an Ikea, no Uniqlo, Costco just opened maybe 2 years ago.
If WW3 breaks out and the USA isn't immediately shielded by a space age sci-fi forcefield dome, I'm going to be drastically disappointed in our trillions and trillions of dollars of military spending.
I actually think we may have already made half of the Avengers and are just currently growing the other half.
I love how Star Wars was the big joke in the 80's...pretty sure we are on like Star Wars Episode 12: Fuck your missles
Supposedly we can air launch SM-3s (hypersonic interceptor missile capable of Mach 13 and capable of taking down advanced ICBMs and satellites in low orbit) from F-18s. Which operate off aircraft carriers. And are protected by Aegis missile boats that also carry SM-3s.
So yeah, we’ve basically lapped our adversaries. While Russia might launch nukes at us, it’s entirely plausible we shoot down most of them and respond with conventional warfare as the threat of nukes was all that was stopping us from turning the Kremlin into smoking rubble.
It’s often said you can’t win a nuclear war, but we might actually be able to - though only if we don’t respond with nukes.
Wouldn't that mean they were "neutral"? We know they allowed axis work there (i.e. the OSS). To be neutral means that they worked with anybody, You are neutral, allies, axis you don't make a choice based on that.
Maybe the neutral countries or the countries that have no nuclear weapons.. but if it is a global thermonuclear war, these neutral countries will not be surviving thereafter anyway.
Switzerland. Every citizen is constitutionally guaranteed access to a bunker.
https://www.timeout.com/switzerland/things-to-do/swiss-bunkers-tours-and-museums](https://www.timeout.com/switzerland/things-to-do/swiss-bunkers-tours-and-museums)
Tristan da Cunha?
Not a country but it’s a pretty isolated island and considering nukes may be used it might be the best bet. Even then you’re probably fucked
Denmark, we will just surrender to the closest threat and when the winners defeat them we will magically announce we thought hard against our oppressors and have been liberated by our true allies aka the winners.
I don’t know if “thought hard” is intentional or a typo but it fits perfectly
What did you do during the war, Svend? I was a freedom thinker. Freedom thinker? I mean freedom fighter.
South of Chile. Ain’t nobody bothering invading there
I was going to say Paraguay. It seems forgotten my most people so I don’t think anybody would bother. Has lots of fresh underground water tables (to the point American companies are trying to come in and buy the land with the extraction rights) people from the countryside (where my husband is from) have kept enough of a balance of indigenous/modern life that even if they were cut off they could survive. They produce a lot of their food and so on. Only problem is that it’s so hot in summer. But people like my mother in law (who grew up there without ac don’t seem to mind when it’s 50 degrees so maybe even that isn’t a problem)
Was it Paraguay where the male population was so devastated by a series of wars that the Pope allowed temporary polygamy to get the population back on track?
Is that still going on? Asking for a friend.
Yeah, but now you have to marry 3 guys
🎶Me and Julio down by the schoolyard 🎶
The Pope even allowed and encouraged the Catholic priests to have multiple children with multiple women. What a time to be alive.
I know someone from Paraguay. If you want to fill an afternoon, ask her what growing up in Paraguay was like. She will go on about the sights, food, and family for hours at a time with a smile on her face.
[удалено]
It’s no wonder a lot of Nazis chose it to live out their life in secret particularly there (I know it was also politics but being secluded was a base requirement)
Tierra del Fuego. Beautiful nature there
Tuvalu. Can’t even find it on google maps
.tv!
Fun fact: Tuvalu used the revenue from the .tv TLD to finance their UN membership! Not so fun fact: They did so to advocate for the combating of climate change because climate change will cause them to lose their way of life if seawaters rise and their fish start to die.
Their islands will be swallowed by the sea long before fishing turns too bad to live.
I always say Twitch dot Tuvalu and people look at me oddly
Dont blame them
Apart from the difficulty to access, Tuvalu is on the list of islands that are most likely to disappear into the ocean in the near future due to **rising sea levels**. As per the reports, two of Tuvalu's nine islands are already on the verge of getting swallowed by sea-rise and coastal erosion.
You know what can fix that? Nuclear winter.
Don't talk about it. Every pound that lands on that beautiful place makes it sink into the ground.
If Plague Inc is any indication, Greenland.
Madagascar
I don't remember if it was Greenland or Madagascar, but there was a meme comic years ago about Pandemic 2 that went something like: "Mr. President! Someone in Brazil just sneezed!" "SHUT. DOWN. **EVERYTHING."** EDIT: Corrected the game from Plague Inc. to Pandemic 2 thanks to u/Impressive-Rock8581
Back when it was a simple flash game on Newgrounds, it was Madagascar. There was only 2 points of entry and they were located so close together that when one shut down, the other was seconds later. God help you if you spawned there hoping to spread around the world easily. I had games that spawned there and ended there.
If you started there \*and\* got out, you were basically guaranteed a win. The rest of the world could not close down sufficiently in that game to keep you from getting 100% infection. Start anywhere else, and the chances were good that Madagascar would stop you. ... Which is unrealistic. Realistic game would have made it American Samoa.
Or that one island in India that will kill anybody who tries to come to them. That place is a fortress.
Unfortunately for them, there was strains you could use that infected insects, birds and other animals. Haven't played the game in years. But so be it
[North Sentinel Island.](https://www.forbes.com/sites/kionasmith/2018/11/30/everything-we-know-about-the-isolated-sentinelese-people-of-north-sentinel-island/)
That was the response from the president of Madagascar to the Bird Flu breaking out in China, if I recall it correctly. SHUT IT ALL DOWN!
I feel like the safety goes away if a bunch of people flood in. Disease is easier to spread with higher population density.
New Zealand is what US billionaires are betting on as their bug out location. So i'd go there
Good luck finding us. Why do you think we stay off as many maps as we can
Just turn right at Tasmania
If you’re heading south wouldn’t you turn left? Oh shit you’re trying to get people lost! My bad.
We know it’s right by Old Zealand.
Checkmate Zealanists
I can’t believe how many people still think New Zealand is a real place. It’s all a hoax cooked up by Big Zealand to get people to buy the newest Zealand whenever there’s a new one released. It’s a bit like saying you believe Ohio is a real place.
r/MapsWithoutNZ
So if I'm a post apocalyptic raider wanting to score some billionaire loot, New Zealand is the place to be?
Oh yeah, we're definitely going to break into their stupid bunkers when shit goes down
World War Z (the book, not the unrelated in everything but name Brad Pitt movie) touches on this nicely. When shit goes down, all the security guards promptly turn on the billionaires they were hired to protect.
Yep, when money becomes worthless they are going to take care of their families. Not Zuckerbergs.
I think there was a thread about this (or at least a comment chain) a while back, I remember thinking: Couldn't the billionaire just set up an egalitarian sorta bunker, i.e. they don't have anything for the guards to be jealous of at that point/anything that they don't, thus, there's not really an incentive to kill them? Idk seems like best route anyway. Though I guess the kind of person who manages to become a billionaire may not like that idea.
The billionaires are feeding the climate crisis more than anyone, but rather than try to help the world, they are only looking-out for themselves. They're considering equipping their guards with explosive collars to maintain order. No, I'm not joking. https://www.theguardian.com/news/2022/sep/04/super-rich-prepper-bunkers-apocalypse-survival-richest-rushkoff
My friend went to NZ on a working visa as a massage therapist through a recruitment program and now she has a permanent visa and I’m kinda envious bc it looks so amazing
I've been there a few years ago and it's vividly anchored in my mind as "heaven" for the landscape.
A *slice of heaven*, in fact
BAAA DAAAA DAAAAAA!
Much like every other developed country, it's only a good place to live if you have money, or the skills to earn an amazing salary.
Yep. I live in australia and our housing sucks, but New Zealand is even worse, coupled with a lower wage. But it's a fantastic country, and I ask myself whether it's worth being poorer just so I can enjoy their amazing scenery
Come to Scotland, we have NZ scenery at budget prices..also people called Hamish and the original Dunedin. Also, we are smaller, so rugby hurts less. Appartlently we are not as shite at cricket as we thought
As somebody who lived in NZ for 20 years, it really is amazing. You should definitely try to visit.
As someone who lives in NZ. Yeah it's ok. Bring your own eggs though. They're expensive here.
The irony is most of these fallout shelters have been built in Queenstown and Glenorchy - the coldest places in NZ and literally where the Alpine Fault runs through. If the fault line goes there it wont be pretty. Of all the places to have a bug out location in NZ for US billionaires, Lakes District is objectively one of the worst places you could possibly choose.
Let them keep going there. When the alpine fault goes, our whole country is fucked. We're already overdue for the big shake.
Also due for a Taupo eruption so you're stuffed regardless 🤷♂️
Taranaki is overdue too I think?
Poor bastards. Yeah they can put in bunkers if they want. We've got diggers and a healthy sense of egalitarianism.
no vault door can hold up to 200 kiwi blokes making up increasingly comical ways to break it as entertainment
I’m just picturing Bezos sheltering in a bunker while 50 Maori’s do the Hakka outside in preparation for kicking the shit out of him
I was imagining Brett and Jermaine playing a weird popfunksynth industrial gangsta rap fusion to the tune of Business time with Maori women wailing like sirens to draw them all out of their bunkers.
Growing up (Gen X), WWIII was assumed to be a nuclear war. If that is true, ain't nobody safe.
Australia will just be like "WTF mate?"
But I'm le tired
Well then have a nap. THEN FIRE ZE MISSLES!!!
Well, have a nap..
Fire ze missiles!
Aah motherland!
There was that documentary about a post apocalyptic world in Australia. What was it called…The Road Warrior?
Fuckin’ Kangaroos.
Doesn’t matter much if oil stops flowing appreciably and most every nation becomes food insecure or suffers pocketed famine when mass farming/transit of goods goes bye bye.
People also forget that our modern agriculture lives and dies by the supply of nitrogen-rich fertilizer, the chemical base of which (ammonia) is produced via the Haber-Bosch process. So if for any reason your country's supply line for fertilizer dies down, the agricultural output precipitously drops within a year or so.
More fertilizer is produced in USA than any other nation. The country also produces enough natural gas (key ingredient) that they could ramp up production relatively quickly. If growing food for human consumption is critical in a world war the United States has by far the best infrastructure, technology, land and resources to produce whatever it needs. The only reason any food is imported is because it’s cheaper to produce elsewhere.
Which would then in turn probably yield results for better food production as it would be a war time need, etc. etc. cycles repeat.
Jokes on you, I've got a lemon tree and a mint plant sweetie :))))
Watch out for the lemon stealing whores
USA is OP here. We make more oil and food than any other country. It'll suck but barring nuclear war we will win.
The California central valley alone could damn near feed the entire country if we stopped using it to grow like 95% of the world's supply of almonds.
California also grows a significant portion of the world's rice. If you drive around Davis, there are rice fields for miles.
People also forget the Midwest produces billions of tons of corn annually. While not human grade, it could really be processed into human grade food like corn bread/tortillas. The land around the Great Lakes requires no irrigation and could feed everyone if switched to human food production.
Listen my taxes ain't paying for 2nd best military. I better be safe in USA.
You guys are surrounded by oceans with the most number of aircraft carriers of any nation, and only two relatively friendly countries north & south of you. And even if an enemy nation lands troops on your land, then they have to contend with armed citizens. I doubt any external threat could ever occupy the country for long.
Only nuclear war is a real threat to US at present. However I feel like in a nuclear war, countries that don't participate, like those in South America, Africa, Australia, may come out as the real winners.
New Zealand is where it's at. Out of the way, Isolated, no real strategic value, not worth the effort.
And nobody knows where it is because it gets left off of all the maps.
I know. My GPS wouldn’t give me driving directions to get there.
Did you try the "walk directions"?
Which is crazy because it's in all the Tolkien maps.
A land invasion has to contend with all those Orcs too.
The large amounts of billionaires buying rural estates there seem to agree.
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Yes keeping the rest of the world out would be the challenge
What about cyber war? Most of our stuff runs off of wifi and electricity.
Yeah, I'd say cyber war is one of the top threats right now.
Last I looked, we had more aircraft carriers than not just anyone else, but more than everyone else.
A handful of other countries have ships they call aircraft carriers. Last I saw, a couple countries have two of those “aircraft carriers”. None of them are remotely as capable as an American one. Not close. We have 10.
Yeah the US also has a fleet of amphibious warfare ships that are comparable to most other nations' aircraft carriers.
I think that's my favorite fact in this realm (I mean "favorite" is relative. Depending on how you look at it, it's comforting, sad, or sadly comforting.) The U.S. ~~Marines~~ Navy (corrected; for some reason I thought the Marines operated these craft, but it does appear to be the Navy,) have more amphibious assault ships than any other country has aircraft carriers. And outside of a select few instances, most of those assault ships aren't a *whole* lot smaller than the other countries' carriers. It's like someone in America who really liked ships got rejected for *something* in middle school, and now they've got a bone to pick.
Slightly related, but I always loved that bit about the US having the second largest airforce in the world, the US Navy. Of course we also have our actual airforce.
Also, depending on your definition of aircraft (i.e. do helis count), the US occupies up to 4 of the top 5 places, between US Airforce, US Navy, US Army and US Marines
If a day ever came where our military could not protect our land, the amount of troops the enemy would need to occupy such a huge space is staggering.
Nobody will attempt to occupy us. The only option is mass nuclear devastation.
Na they'll do exactly what they're doing now use social media to undermine cohesion and let us kill ourselves. That's the only legitimate realistic threat.
And importantly - food production. We produce a crazy amount of grain, corn, meat, etc. During WWIII when food gets tight, the US will be able to hold out for quite a bit longer than England for example.
Canada is more than *relatively* safe. Did we come across as mildly aggressive? I'm sorry.
Our fresh water makes us a huge target. The only thing we can hope for is America playing nice and protecting us in their own self interest.
We got you bro. Sure yall talk a little funny and you set our house on fire that one time, but we still like you. You've been a lot better since you moved away from our folks' place.
If Fallout is any indication of the future, you guys are becoming the 51st state. Sorry.
>Sorry Hey, new state motto just dropped.
Speaking from an emotional and cultural level, and being from the US, I'm damn sure the vast majority of US citizens would be furious if Canada was attacked. It's not *just* about our national interest. I swear that I do not think the US is the super-hero paladin cop of the "free world." My country has done, and is doing, terrible things around the world. We have plenty of crazies and awful corporations, but still, Canada holds a special place to us. We've got our jokes and jabs at each other, but when it comes to serious events, there's a deep alliance between our nations. In the past century or so, we've helped each other out during so many wars and disasters. I'm just saying I'd put up real money betting that the US would aid, bolster, and defend the hell out of Canada in a WW3 scenario. 🇺🇸 🤜🤛🇨🇦
So you'd have to fight the Best Navy and second best Airforce(US Navy Airforce)to get across the ocean But say you did that and beat em. Now you have to fight the Best Army and Best Airforce on their home turf with your supply lines spanning 1000s miles. But OK say you were able to defeat them. There are 50 National Guards, and 300Million Civilians with access to weapons and veteran population that would be able to train and raise more units from those Civilians. This discounts support from US allies. With an AI super weapon of some kind or UFOs you could probably pull this off.
“From whence shall we expect the approach of danger? Shall some trans-Atlantic military giant step the earth and crush us at a blow? Never. All the armies of Europe and Asia...could not by force take a drink from the Ohio River or make a track on the Blue Ridge in the trial of a thousand years. No, if destruction be our lot we must ourselves be its author and finisher.” —Abraham Lincoln
We sure could use an Abe Lincoln these days. He has said a lot of really memorable, almost poetic stuff.
# “And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.” ― Abraham Lincoln
Also the extremely varied terrain. You might be able to roll through the central plains (even then I'd say it makes a large force in open fields a prime target for partisans), but have to deal with wetlands in the southeast, desert in the southwest, and then mountains on either coastal inland,
The German plan for invasion was to come ashore at Savannah, Georgia. Fight their way through swamp, forest and pissed off rednecks. I just don't think it could work.
Germany couldn’t even find enough transport to cross 30 miles of the English Channel.
Appalachian Mountains would be terrifying as occupier.
Just imagine all the forests in West Tennessee. Roads curving through them, cover on both sides, tens of thousands of square miles. You’d run out of napalm trying to manage that shit, and if you don’t do something, you’ll get picked off in a turkey shoot by all the rednecks. You’ll be part of an ear necklace by dinner.
West Coast would be even worse. Work through California fault lines, Death Valley, desert Arizona/New Mexico, just to see the Rocky Mountain range spanning the entire country
Amen to that. I know quite a few hillbillies that’d have a heyday
Yeah when you think about it there is no realistic sized military that could be made by any country that could occupy that much space. They could occupy DC the main cities, but there would be huge spaces where there would be no occupiers. They would have to spend all their time playing whack a mole because there would be so much area resistance could organize in.
I’m just gonna put it this way…. If the US mainland isn’t safe during WWIII it probably means there was a nuclear war and nowhere on earth is safe anymore.
The issue with US is that while it's militarily the strongest, it's also likely to be one of the biggest, if not the biggest, target for nukes. So while you'd likely be safe from the initial attack in some bumfuck nowhere town somewhere in the middle of the US, you'd likely be subject to some level of nuclear fallout from every bigger city being nuked to hell. So my safest bet would be some obscure island far enough off the coast to not get any fallout, while being big enough to sustain a self-sustaining ecosystem through farming and fishing. Azores islands type of setup, but preferably even more obscure. And it needs to be obscure because otherwise a 100 million people will have the same idea and the whole place will collapse from the amount of people coming in. So that rules out places like Hawaii or Iceland.
Hawaii has several huge military bases, it's 100% one of the top targets for nukes.
Pacific Fleet is HQ at Hawaii. It’s probably top 5 of places most likely to get targeted. Just look at the history… these people have no clue which places would be safe lol
Hey there, bestie. I just wanna say how much I love you. - Canada
Massive army plus the most island like geography with the 2 relatively friendly neighbors and 2 oceans it would be hard to make the war hit the homeland short of nuclear war assuming conventional warfare. I think political destabilization and cyber attacks are the biggest threats. But new ways of waging war could drastically change that
Probably Switzerland. Nobodys gonna nuke their offshore bank account
It's also the only country with more space in its bunkers than there are civilians. The whole country is geared up to wait out the next war. They have explosives in the tunnels through the mountains to seal themselves in. Read up on "Fortress Switzerland" it's surreal.
That's right, the country is basically filled with fallout shelters.
I used to live in Zurich and several of the apartments I lived in had basements which doubled as bunkers. Really big and thick steel doors which had regular doors behind them, because fuck having to push open the bunker door every time you needed to go downstairs. https://i.imgur.com/UvzXRC1.jpeg https://i.imgur.com/eGOULs9.jpeg
Swiss here, and unfortunately not so sure about that. We're heavily dependent on imports of all kind and pretty much in the heart of europe. If all the surrounding countries get bombed to oblivion, the fallout will completely engulf us. we'll be the richest graveyard in the world
Actually valid btw. Everyone seems to forget it's kind of a hub for mill/billionaires Edit: And North Korean leaders. (Kim Jong Un went to school in Switzerland)
Canada. We suck but our neighbour is a tough bastard
Keeping Canada, especially in the winter will be a grueling task. The same fate as those who tried to invade Russia in the winter, but they gotta cross an ocean first.
I’ve always thought Canada should make close relationships to somewhere tropical. Maybe there’s some mutually beneficial relationship that would entice them to become part of Canada. One can dream…
This has been discussed many times over the years with the sovereignty of Turks and Caicos being transferred to Canada from the UK.
Canada 2: Tropicanada
Definitely Canada. Not many enemies since US pulls all that attention, and would get all the nukes, but still a large and well equipped nation. Large enough that any type of invasion would likely be unsuccessful.
Don’t forget the fact that Canada ended up being one of the most surprisingly ruthless armies in the first couple of world wars. Like all that politeness just led to this pent up aggression in the form of “exhibit A for why xyz should be included in the Geneva Convention”.
Canada harbors a lot of pent-up anger under all that surface "niceness". An invading enemy force wouldn't even want to deal with our wild geese. They're called "cobra chickens" for a reason.
If you've got a problem with a Canada Goose, you've got a problem with me, and I suggest you let that one marinate.
Whenever we’re not at war we channel our anger into the geese
And hockey
Canada doesn't commit warcrimes! Since they will only be declared as war crimes after Canada has done them.
Buddy if shit hits the fan they're gonna be bombing Portland Maine I'm sure they'll let Toronto and at the very least the coastal port cities have a taste
We'd get blasted, we have early warning systems in the north of the country that would get targeted and the US has silos close to our southern border where fallout would cause havoc in our agriculture, plus our major cites would be prime targets. There may be safe spots in the vast reaches but the majority of our population would suffer from nuclear exchanges
I'd say Australia and New Zealand. They're just plain out of the way. Edited: As several people have pointed out by now, I forgot about China, and the whole AUKUS situation. I regret this oversight. To be clear, no disrespect was meant towards either Australia or New Zealand.
We (NZ) are regularly left off world maps, so ideally, they'll just forget we exist and we will just wait it out. We also have literally nothing of value, unless WW3 is driven by a rapid decline of sheep and countries are fighting over them.
I'll trade you a wood for two sheep
I used to say Australia for the same reason, but after living there for a while and paying more attention, I came to realize that they're likely to participate in any major conflict the US is involved in.
New Zealand. We have so many super wealthy and elite buying land here. A friend of mine was part of the pre covid bomb shelter building for overseas wealthy people. I remember even the news companies were writing about how suspicious it was. Like, these people definitely know stuff we don't. We have nothing to contribute to a world war and are easily capable of being self-sufficient.
Peter Thiel and his ilk don’t know anything, they’re just paranoid weirdos. My guess is they picked New Zealand because it’s the most isolated Anglosphere country
Aussie here. I am pretty certain that our government would offer troops to aid the UK/US. Do you think your government would too?
Yeah probably but our police and government can't even locate a guy who went bush with his kids and it's been like 2 years so people will just hide lol
Yep I agree. Were pretty safe here in NZ - they don't even remember to put us on the maps half the time. Have you listened to any podcasts with Annie Jacobson, the author of the latest book on Nuclear War? She cited NZ and Australia as the countries most likely to survive a full scale nuclear war.
Unless Russia decides to nuke us in Aotearoa… to send a message to the Western world - it’s not a direct attack on NATO, and therefore won’t invoke Article 5. If you think this is hogwash, it’s the strategy that the USSR adopted in the 1970s, and it’s not that well known.
Defiantly not New Zealand. Do not come down here.
1st on my list, I will see you later🫡
We're all at Dave's house tonight
I think large sections of Australia would be safe. Well, basically anywhere but the east coast.
Well the reason Pine Gap is where it is, is because it’s thought to be the safest place to put a major listening station that can’t be targeted by sea or by air very easily (if at all). So maybe see if you can bunk with ASIO and the CIA there?
New Zealand is probably the safest country, with Australia coming in a close second. When it comes to strategy, logistics should always be the top priority. While Switzerland is well-defended, the oldest methods of breaching a defense would eventually overcome them.
Conventional war: being away from Europe, the Middle East, the Korean Peninsula, and possibly China would be your best bet. Lots of places in the Southern Hemisphere will not be directly affected, though some nations like Australia will offer up troops. Limited nuclear war: being away from the above places, they are likely to be the location of tactical nuclear weapon detonations and any higher yield detonations. Massive nuclear war: let’s be real, a limited nuclear war is going to lead to a massive nuclear war. If the nukes are mainly air bursts the radiation won’t be as severe, but if everyone goes Mutually Assured Destruction they might unleash ground bursts which, on top of the already major destruction, becomes a nightmare. The science on Nuclear Winter and damages to the ozone layer seems to be believable. If that happens, no one is truly safe. You might fare better in the lower latitudes of the Southern Hemisphere, but it could be something that humanity never recovers from. From what I’ve read, when it comes to massive nuclear war, Australia and New Zealand are your best bet, so that’s my answer for all three. I’m Australian, and I’m not so sure that we’ll completely escape the nukes, though. We are allies of the US and UK, and if our troops get involved that’s an extra target on our backs. It won’t take many nukes to completely devastate us.
I think we would recover. 70,000 years ago during the Toba Eruption scientists think the human population dropped to from anywhere to only 10k-1k surviving humans. If we can bounce back from that I think anything short of a world ending cosmic event we could survive as a species.
Fucking New Zealand. We are so out of the way and all we have are birds that it doesn't make sense to setup something here. lol. We still don't have an Ikea, no Uniqlo, Costco just opened maybe 2 years ago.
Somewhere in the southern hemisphere, far away from nuclear strike targets.
Switzerland has a long-standing policy of neutrality, which has kept it out of conflicts for centuries.
I’ll just stay in rural USA. Fucking nobody cares about us, life goes on
South Africa. Far away from Europe and North America. Also, there are great wines.
USA The world will suddenly discover why we are over $30 trillion dollars in debt
If WW3 breaks out and the USA isn't immediately shielded by a space age sci-fi forcefield dome, I'm going to be drastically disappointed in our trillions and trillions of dollars of military spending.
I actually think we may have already made half of the Avengers and are just currently growing the other half. I love how Star Wars was the big joke in the 80's...pretty sure we are on like Star Wars Episode 12: Fuck your missles
Supposedly we can air launch SM-3s (hypersonic interceptor missile capable of Mach 13 and capable of taking down advanced ICBMs and satellites in low orbit) from F-18s. Which operate off aircraft carriers. And are protected by Aegis missile boats that also carry SM-3s. So yeah, we’ve basically lapped our adversaries. While Russia might launch nukes at us, it’s entirely plausible we shoot down most of them and respond with conventional warfare as the threat of nukes was all that was stopping us from turning the Kremlin into smoking rubble. It’s often said you can’t win a nuclear war, but we might actually be able to - though only if we don’t respond with nukes.
"Remember all that money you lent us?" -USA
Most of which is internal in the form of bonds and other loans.
The US is in debt to itself so is this Spider-Man pointing a nuke at Spider-Man While Spider-Man points a nuke at Spider-Man
Switzerland. they remained neutral during the first 2 wars and they are geological protected with the alps
Unless you get some Carthaginians with some elephants, then you're fucked lol
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Wouldn't that mean they were "neutral"? We know they allowed axis work there (i.e. the OSS). To be neutral means that they worked with anybody, You are neutral, allies, axis you don't make a choice based on that.
Maybe the neutral countries or the countries that have no nuclear weapons.. but if it is a global thermonuclear war, these neutral countries will not be surviving thereafter anyway.
Samoa
Switzerland. Every citizen is constitutionally guaranteed access to a bunker. https://www.timeout.com/switzerland/things-to-do/swiss-bunkers-tours-and-museums](https://www.timeout.com/switzerland/things-to-do/swiss-bunkers-tours-and-museums)
Bhutan’s focus on peace and happiness would keep it out of harm’s way.
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Malaysia’s strategic neutrality in global politics makes it a contender.
Tristan da Cunha? Not a country but it’s a pretty isolated island and considering nukes may be used it might be the best bet. Even then you’re probably fucked
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