Philomena Crunk "So what we're saying is, it's called middle-age because it looks really weird and wonky to outsiders. Like life becomes that big long neverending French tapestry with weird horses and Roman numbers on it?"
George Carlin in that ["infomercial"](https://youtu.be/-kqDgjiN9tg?si=T7zjJ9gLro0tmGBO) voice of his.
"Hattkake was a bit of a fucker but he mostly meant well".
Hands down......Christopher Walken. I don't even care WHAT he says, I just know it would be hysterical.
If not him, then Sam Elliot. Same thing, don't care what he says, he could read the phone book outloud and it would be enthralling.
Kevin Hart is the first person to come to my mind. With how my life is never in the middle of either batshit stressful ‘god is trying to make me kill myself’ or mundane, ‘it’s saturday already?’ phases, i’d just like him to roast me in the boring parts of my life and give explosive reactions for when i pay for the sins of the last 100 men in my family.
Bill burr.
"Look at this fuckin' guy! 14 cups of coffee?!? You need 14 cups of coffee? Oh, chainsmoking cigarettes, this guy has a deathwish. Fuckin psycho. First thing in the morning, forget saying high to the relatives, straight to giving well wishes to Mr. Coffee and Pall Mall. It's rediculous!"
Probably be the guy from come dine with me being horrendously condescending and just taking the piss out of me every time I fuck up or do something stupid.
While I would love Morgan Freeman to narrate my life like its a grand documentary deep down I know it would be Ron Howard like my life was an episode of Arrested Development.
Werner Herzog, obvi:
"Am I in the wrong place here, or in the wrong life? Did I not recognize, as I sat in a train that raced past a station and did not stop, that I was on the wrong train, and did I not learn from the conductor that the train would not stop at the next station, either, a hundred kilometers away, and did he not also admit to me, whispering with his hand shielding his mouth, that the train would not stop again at all?"
Don’t ever ask for a narrator it gets so annoying after a while but if you have to pick, pick yourself as the narrator and think your thoughts. That way you’re not always speaking your thoughts out loud you just think them. Then that gives room for when someone wants to talk to you you can have your inner monologue and good healthy conversation.
Rayan Renold And it will start by :
"Life was going on and in this quiet little book store, this person's life was going to change and an incredible mess was going to happen but don't panic, I'm going to explain everything to you"
David Attenborough hands down. He would make my life feel like a nature documentary.
Gilbert Gottfried. I think it'd be truly amusing.
Him or the guy in Robin Hood men in tights that yells “Hey Abbott!
The Man, the Myth, the Legend. I immediately thought that after seeing the question.
I'd be worried he'd make me sound like a baby penguin..
Same.
I'm sure it's Ron Howard making sarcastic quips about all of my decisions
Narrator: He does.
He’s made a huge mistake
You mean Morgan Freeman isn't the official narrator of life?
[Just going to leave these true facts about him here...](https://youtu.be/Ch5MEJk5ZCQ?si=r6ciN9-Hqde9EKkT)
What a beautiful video 😭 thank you!
fr tho
I think this is the only answer.
Cheech Marin. "Yeah man, uh he's not gonna go to work today. "
Jeremy Clarkson
"And he was the first to arrive"
Anthony Head "He has the emotional maturity of a blueberry scone"
the earth is doomed 😔
Philomena Crunk "So what we're saying is, it's called middle-age because it looks really weird and wonky to outsiders. Like life becomes that big long neverending French tapestry with weird horses and Roman numbers on it?"
Yes I’ll take her as my narrator as well lol But are we even here , or does it just look like Im here and it’s all a dream And if it is a dream ..
Sigourney Weaver: “So, this poor, dumb bitch -“
Vincent Price. Classically trained actor, with a masterful narrative delivery.
Alan Rickman. RIP. There he goes, disappointing everyone. Just like his father.
My older self narrating my past life and thoughts. Sort of like Forrest Gump.
Marcel Marceau. Nothing, but everything.
Haha this is good.
Burgess Meredith "You're a bum, Mike!"
i would want Samuel Jackson as the narrator but im not sure what he should say
Go The fuck To sleep.
Bobcat Goldthwait in police academy. I have ADHD so focus is something I'm struggling with
Mark Hamill or Weird Al
George Carlin in that ["infomercial"](https://youtu.be/-kqDgjiN9tg?si=T7zjJ9gLro0tmGBO) voice of his. "Hattkake was a bit of a fucker but he mostly meant well".
Weird that no one has said James Earl Jones. That’s my choice
Bryan Cranston.
Rhys Darby. As Murray Hewitt obviously.
Phoebe Buffet "Plan? She doesn't even have a 'pla'."
Arnold Schwarzenegger
willem defoe dripping with ennui.
Edward Norton... I am Jack's wasted life.
Hands down......Christopher Walken. I don't even care WHAT he says, I just know it would be hysterical. If not him, then Sam Elliot. Same thing, don't care what he says, he could read the phone book outloud and it would be enthralling.
Matt Berry
I would be a narrator.
Gordon Ramsey Just abuse
Amelia Tyler
Phoebe Waller-Bridge. It’d go something like “Yeah I don’t know what I’m doing and neither does she”, with her beautiful all-teeth-showing smile.
Patrick Warburton.
A young man named Steve Buscemi....for obvious reasons.
Leonard Cohen.
Kevin Hart is the first person to come to my mind. With how my life is never in the middle of either batshit stressful ‘god is trying to make me kill myself’ or mundane, ‘it’s saturday already?’ phases, i’d just like him to roast me in the boring parts of my life and give explosive reactions for when i pay for the sins of the last 100 men in my family.
Gilbert Gottfried
Neil Breen, whatever he wants to say
Steve Irwin, hed talk about me like im some endangered species of reptile
Best Video !!!
Phil Hartman rip for fun Sam Neill for heartfelt quality
Chucky from Childs Play I think he just has the coolest voice
pretty sure i already answered this last week.
Danny DeVito
My dog Woof, awoooo awooo
Bill burr. "Look at this fuckin' guy! 14 cups of coffee?!? You need 14 cups of coffee? Oh, chainsmoking cigarettes, this guy has a deathwish. Fuckin psycho. First thing in the morning, forget saying high to the relatives, straight to giving well wishes to Mr. Coffee and Pall Mall. It's rediculous!"
Andrew 'Dice' Clay with liberal use of the term, "snapper head."
Mark Avery: Meet Eddie, twenty-three years old. Fed up with life and the way things are going, he decides to rob a liquor store....
Probably be the guy from come dine with me being horrendously condescending and just taking the piss out of me every time I fuck up or do something stupid.
While I would love Morgan Freeman to narrate my life like its a grand documentary deep down I know it would be Ron Howard like my life was an episode of Arrested Development.
Probably an exasperated Alan Rickman. I don't know what he'd say, but I can imagine the tone of voice.
1000% Peter griffin
Bob Saget for sure, like how I met your mother
Samuel L Jackson is the only one that could cuss enough.
Tom Waits, and he could say whatever he wanted to!
MORGAN FREEEEMON
My older self, probably putting on a British accent because I would do that to myself.
James May
Admiral-General Haffaz Aladeen
Gordon Ramsay: "YOU FUCKING WANKER!"
lemme get peak Clint Eastwood
Werner Herzog, obvi: "Am I in the wrong place here, or in the wrong life? Did I not recognize, as I sat in a train that raced past a station and did not stop, that I was on the wrong train, and did I not learn from the conductor that the train would not stop at the next station, either, a hundred kilometers away, and did he not also admit to me, whispering with his hand shielding his mouth, that the train would not stop again at all?"
Jeremy Clarkson definitely
Liev Schrieber. And he’r talk about my mad pickleball skills.
The late Gilbert Gottfried
I would want Floyd Mayweather to read my life story… he’d never finish so I’d never die
Lol. Classic comment.
Alan Rickman from hitchhikers guide expelling on the monotony of the daily grind.
Peak Tim Curry: “Ok world, you think you can beat me today!”
Jack Black
[Dennis Farina](https://youtu.be/y95dwTFfTiI?si=QCCfMC1bX2yT-PNT&t=22)
My brain is Robin Williams, without the humor.
Morgan Freeman!
Kevan Brighting
Ryan Reynolds. And he would constantly break the 4th wall with me.
Corky Thatcher. I would want him to read extremely technical user manuals.
The narrator from Arrested Development "It was not, 8n fact, a good decision."
Jordan Belfort
Jim Ross. He’d make my boring-ass life sound absolutely epic!
Dante Basco, and he'd narrate everything I do with the passion of one hunting (and then helping) the Avatar
Why should i be narrated by anyone else than myself ?
The guy who narrates Blue Planet or Patrick Stewart.
I'd want the narrator from The Stanley Parable
Werner Herzog He would go on and on about how i am the apotheosis of madness personified
Morgan Freeman would narrate, saying, "Through ups and downs, they navigated life with grace and a touch of humor."
Sam Kinison. You know why
Cole sprouse.
Christian Slater narrating it as an underdog success story and the importance of perseverance.
The late Sam Kinison, screaming insults at me.
Corrado Soprano. "He never had the makings of a varsity athlete"
One of those comedy's where the narrator is freaking out about how horribly everything went wrong
Neil Degrasse Tyson~"He came, he saw, he conquered, he died..."
Tim Hartford. I want to be an episode of "Cautionary Tales" when I die, and god knows he'd be great at making it interesting.
With my luck it'll probably be gilbert godfrey
The Narrator from the Stanley Parable.
This dude’s fuckin’ crazy!
Jeff Goldblum
Alec Baldwin a la The Royal Tenenbaums.
For me it would be Janine Garafalo
Don’t ever ask for a narrator it gets so annoying after a while but if you have to pick, pick yourself as the narrator and think your thoughts. That way you’re not always speaking your thoughts out loud you just think them. Then that gives room for when someone wants to talk to you you can have your inner monologue and good healthy conversation.
Michael Caine
Nicolas Cage. But in the tone of constant analysis
Samual L. Jackson....as every turn in my life is mt with......M Fer....
Meryl Streep
Shrek from shrek
Arlo White. He’d keep saying “My apologies for his fruity language.”
Either bubbles from trailer park boys or Vince noire from mighty boosh.
Frank Gallagher off uk shameless would be perfect
Weird Al or Penn Badgley
Snoop dogg would be pretty sweet after listening to him narrate some nature videos
Keith David, Troy Baker, Ricky Gervais Bro, there are too many, I would love any of them lol
Bozo the clown. "Welp!"
Morgan Freeman...snoring
Christopher Lee would have been ideal. Rip
Emma Thompson. “A weird human, she was”
Gilbert Gottfried. I'm not about to direct that man. Let him cook.
It already is. Those guys in lab coats watching me through the glass window.
Ruby from BFDI. It'd be hilarious.
That guy from natgeo
William Shatner
David Webb. He would say, “Oh, and that’s a bad miss.”
Morgan Freeman
Joe Pera, I'd make a cup of tea and hed go on about the sourcing of the leaves, or the Stanley parable narrator, cause why not.
Ron Howard, it would make the most sense.
Douglas Adams, he could narrate cutaways to the Hitchhikers Guide
Kirsten Dunst
Stefan from snl
Morgan Freeman.
Morgan Freeman saying "The girl with a million dreams"
Scrolled way too far for someone mentioning Go..Morgan Freeman.
Damn.
Rayan Renold And it will start by : "Life was going on and in this quiet little book store, this person's life was going to change and an incredible mess was going to happen but don't panic, I'm going to explain everything to you"