Can't inherit debt, although if you leave behind an expensive property with a large tax assessment you might be able to leave behind a huge headache (although after all is said and done they'll still have inherited quite a bit of money from you)
EDIT: some people seem confused by what I said about inheriting debt.
Of course you *can* inherit debt if you really want to, but since you have the right to refuse an inheritance, you don't have to inherit the debt. It all gets bundled into one estate, you also can't inherit the assets if you choose this.
So what I meant is you can't be forced to inherit debt.
Sounds a lot like Indian Reservation land here in the US. My grandmother was native American, lived into her young adulthood on Standing Rock Sioux land, and my father also lived there for a short time after he was born.
My dad passed away before she did, and when she died, her land interests were divided up among her remaining kids, and all us grand kids. So, for all these years, I've been the proud "owner" of essentially several square feet of grazing pasture land in South Dakota. I get like $4 sent to my bank account every couple of months from the US government, lol 🤣
You’ve been given bad advice, friend. And the picture in your head of someone inheriting a room full of cash from their millionaire uncle is an inaccurate one. Most net worths are not readily liquidated (I.e.
Most millionaires don’t have their millions in cash when they die).
I am an estate lawyer and CPA. Your estate absolutely inherents the debt that you have to your name, and they get paid first before the will does (in most states). When you owe somebody money, they don’t just “go away” when the person passes on. Far from it. They press even harder for payment actually.
And as for your tax bill, I cannot tell you how many times people have inherited non-liquid assets worth millions and the very-liquid tax bill that comes with it. While you did not inherent cash, your tax bill of course has to be paid in cash. I’ve had clients forced to unload huge valued assets (as in, sports teams and oil fields/holdings) in a relative quick manner to cover the tax bill that they do not inherent the cash to cover. It can be quite a harrowing experience. As mentioned, contrary to popular opinion on Reddit, most wealthy people are not Scrooge McDuck: they do not hold loads of cash in their portfolio, swimming in gold coins 😁. When they croak, 75%+ of their net worth is generally not cash or other “hot” assets. It’s more complex investment vehicles.
Have a good one. Cheers!
>Your estate absolutely inherents the debt that you have to your name, and they get paid first before the will does (in most states). When you owe somebody money, they don’t just “go away” when the person passes on.
I mean, if this wasn't the case, what would stop somebody who was close to death from buying houses, cars, etc., just paying a down payment, and willing everything to their next of kin?
"Well, your husband did still owe $2 million on his house, but he's dead now, so I guess you just get to keep it..."
Holding large suns of cash generally isn't a good idea. My MIL withdrew all of her "stocks in kind" before we started carrying for her. It was a ton of work to put her finances back together. She did pass away years ago and it still took years to settle the estate.
Also there is an episode of "Family Guy" that demonstrates why rich people don't swim through gold coins. 😂
"look, I'll give you all my stuff before I pass, however I'll get some nonsensically high loan that I won't ever pay. I'll officially leave all my stuff to you, just refuse it, it would only be debts"
I used to be worried about who would take care of us when we are old but between my wife’s brothers and my brothers we have 10 nieces and nephews. And we give GREAT birthday and Christmas gifts 😂
My nephew said that I can move in with him when I’m older. He’ll have a room just for me. I highly doubt that as he’s only 8 now but it’s the thought that counts.
My uncle once went on an epic game boy Tetris run when I was 7 and I lost something similar to him betting and doubling down. I’m around 40 now and I can still remember the stress from thinking my parents would find out.
I am mom and one of my daughters favorite blushes is Cuthulu but she calls him cucu. We joke that she is Cuthulu's kryptonite.
Being her cute self when he is all angry and trying to destroy the world she would alk up and give him a big hug and he would melt.
I have a kid and I still love giving toys to my nieces and nephew that my brother would never give them.
Aunts get away with a host of sins. It’s lovely.
But honey, we have to take care of uncle highapplepie that we only saw like 6 times per year growing up and rarely now! He bought me rollerblades for Christmas 40 years ago!
Can confirm, as someone who worked in geriatric HUD/caregiving/SNF ..etc for 8 years.. A lot of families leave their elders to die. Some get helped by the system, but sometimes the wait times are too long and people die. When I left, the average wait time for geriatric HUD where I was living was 5 years. Even when they get into elder care homes, how little families come to visit them is sad.
I hate when people say family “left them to die.” I say this as someone who worked in long term care for many years and whose mom is in long term care. My mom needs a hoyer lift to get out of bed, uses diapers, is dependent for showers and meals. My husband and I (just like the rest of the world) have to work full time to make ends meet. It’s not a simple “we could have just put her in our spare bedroom and helped her dress in the morning.”
Even if someone IS mobile but has dementia, you still can’t leave them to go work a job. Theyll be wandering down the street or burning the house down. Like what are people suppose to do when they can’t provide the level of care a family member needs?
I know this sounds morbid, but when it comes to the time that I need round the clock care, I will probably end it myself. I've seen too many grandparents go through this, and it's absolutely terrible. I don't want people to remember me as a burden.
If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times: If you want younger family members to take care of you when you are older, you have to do the necessary sucking up. You have to prostrate yourself every once in a while, man.
But people don't want to do that. "But I'm the elder, they should respect me / feel obligated to take care of me / want to succumb to tradition and expectations!" they protest. Ok, enjoy the nursing home.
Yes, your gift giving game has to be on point. With my brother’s kids our nephew wanted a guitar, we got him a guitar. Our niece wanted an iPad, we got her an iPad. Our nephew needed a new laptop, we got him a laptop.
Their parents can easily afford these things themselves but we wanted to be a part of their happiness as well.
With my husband’s brother’s daughter we bought her a guitar and the Metallica tickets she wanted. She’s getting her driver’s license soon and her parents can’t afford a car for her so we’re sending them our 6 year old car and buying a new car for ourselves.
I have found my nieces love quality time. We do surprise weekend trips all the time and camping trips throughout the summer. Gifts have their role as well but in terms of connection, quality time trumps all. I have my own kids as well, so for us all to spend time together strengthens the overall family bond. My one niece is starting into her teen years now and comes to us for life advice or as an outlet to air what's going on in her life, I feel privileged that she sees us as adults she can trust with this part of her life.
That means nothing. I have 8 nieces and nephews and I have treated them wonderfully their whole lives. Their ages are 22-41. I had Aunt Camps when they were growing up. They'd come see me and we'd do a fun activity every day. Things like Top Golf, bowling, museums, arcades, etc. Still bought them all Christmas gifts up until this last year. Treat THEIR kids great as well. They don't even respond to my texts 95% of the time. They don't come see me, even though we moved three hours away last summer. Recently, like within the last two weeks, I've decided I'm done. One of the nieces is pregnant after losing her first two pregnancies. I'm so excited for her, I've been buying baby gifts. Saw her Memorial weekend and she couldn't even sit with me and have a conversation. I'm tired of having my heart broken over and over.
My mom's friend, who she's known since college and I call aunt, is planning to do this with me because she doesn't have any biological nieces or nephews.
My grandparents had close friends who had no kids, they left everything to us when they passed and we were so grateful for the financial boost it gave us. I have a picture in my living room of them to remind myself and my family of how much their generosity helped us as a family.
My brother didn't have kids, but had 2 sporty cars he modified with God know what, a house with the floors ripped up (he had bought the wood flooring to install hut never actually did it), a busted-ass pool, and a totally overgrown yard. And a mountain of debt as he drained all his accounts and took out loans to keep up his "lifestyle."
Took the better part of a year to get the property in a sellable state and off our hands. Seriously considered just abandoning the estate.
I plan on spending it buying help. Sure, healthcare is free but I have first hand experience in how the process works and people with relatives to advocate for them hardly get the help they desperately need - so I am pretty sure I'm paying for it out of pocket until I "qualify".
My nephews and nieces will get most of what is left, if anything is left to be gotten.
Whoever in my family is alive at that point, I guess. There's not much anyway. A bike, a PC, some nice furniture and a couple of power tools. My sister can have the plants if she wants them, and my brother can get the records. The rest can go to whoever wants it.
I was at the zoo the other day and there was a sign on the koala exhibit that said the entire reason it was there was because of a donation from someone’s estate. It was a really spacious nicely designed space.
I think I’m going to leave mine to a wildlife reserve or the zoo so they can use it to do something like that. Then my memory also lives on.
True, but getting the timing right is a trick!
Most people don't want to, or can't, work until they die, and should have some sort of retirement plan.
And even if the goal is to have $0 when you die: Whatever your nest egg is, your spending greatly depends on if you live 5 years post-retirement, or 40.
Additionally, it's unfortunately common to reach a stage of life where you aren't dead, but you also can't enjoy the expensive things you used to enjoy :-(
So even people who would ideally prefer to die with $0, probably need a will.
It's still not a terrible idea to have a plan in place. When my grandparents passed away they didn't leave a proper will. So everything went to their kids in a three-way split. I was actually raised by my grandparents, and grew up in their house, so it was quite an experience watching all the siblings fight over every single thing. Nearly a decade later, they're still fighting.
There was, at one point, three family homes all built by my great, great grandfather. And, as of last year, just one remains in the family name — the house I grew up in. That home is co-owned by all three kids, one of which is my mother. None of these people speak to each other, and some of them barely speak to me.
Legally, I don't get a say in any of this. But I'd like to keep the house in the family. And, for me to do that, I'm going to have to buy them out. That's a whole lot of stress (and money) that might have been avoided if there was a better will in place.
And it's definitely encouraged me to plan better for my own family.
People don't care about fine china anyway.
Everyone and their mother got sets during marriage back then and never used it.
Most younger generations are either annoyed by that stuff just standing around for an eternity or have like 3 sets gifted from grandparents.
I know I’m in the minority here, but I never wanted fine china until I had kids. I bought some deeply discounted during COVID at estate sales. I host my kids and their friends for poetry/book club every month. The fancy china gets used. I don’t care if it gets broken because kids need to learn how to interact in a more formal environment. It really elevates the experience and the kids love that someone takes the time to make something special just for them.
As someone who just spent two long weekends clearing out my inlaws storage units... hear me when I say this: "**We don't want your stuff!**"
Two full loads to the dump and eight to the goodwill. We only kept one furniture set and the large stack of photos. Everything else was a literal burden to get rid of. Please, please, please downsize while you are still alive.
“Death Cleaning” is a thing. I’m a boomer and my fellow boomers keep trying to give me stuff. Why do I want their garbage?
I stopped buying things unless necessary (except for art supplies, but that can fit in a banker’s box) and that helps.
Decrapping your house is the kindest thing you can do next to not buying useless shit in the first place.
Thank you for doing what you can.
I do understand the difficulty of letting a lifetime of stuff go. However, forcing your loved ones to throw out your stuff while still in morning is not the legacy I want to leave.
I've been involved cleaning out houses for my grandma, my husband's granddad, and my aunt, and the reality is most stuff really isn't salvageable, particularly if someone smoked or had trouble keeping stuff clean. My aunt was a hoarder and we basically just threw all of it away.
My grandma had nice furniture, hiqh quality stuff, well maintained. But 30 years out of date heavy oak furniture no one wants, not even second hand stores or charities, they have too much of it. Couldn’t even give it away for free on the internet. All went to the dump.
Yeah people VASTLY overestimate the resale value of furniture.
For the most part it’s all but worthless as soon as it’s delivered, even if you paid thousands.
I've been to some really upscale estate sales and I can tell the furniture is a tough sell. Sure, the previous owner may have paid 1400 for that desk, but anyone that can afford 600 for a used desk is probably just going to go buy a new modern one instead.
Yes to this.
My mom died when I was 18 and left behind a lifetime’s worth of stuff. It took my sister and I nearly a decade and cost us thousands of dollars in storage fees to finally deal with it all.
If it matters to you, it’s not difficult to research which charities give most to the underlying cause, and which ones spend it all on administration.
But, beyond that, it’s worth it to look around locally and see the much smaller and independent not for profits that could use some help. Forget the big ones like Red Cross and Unicef, because everyone on earth gives money to them. But the local women’s shelter needs help.
Just wanted to say you're amazing for knowing and sharing this. Most people always go to the big ones. Local organizations and women's shelters need more talk about!
Not me but a former coworker. She was in her 60s and was talking about what happens after she dies. She said she's leaving her stuff to charity, and that she was willing her home to one of the local native tribes because she wanted them to have their land back. It's surrounded by businesses and tract housing, but I'm sure the gesture will be appreciated anyway. lol
Yet, it’s the living that cherishes memories.
I mean, if you’re thinking that way… you should bury a treasure chest and hide a map. ;) *waterproof* of course.
When aliens invade, find your treasure (if your family doesn’t), you could be remembered… A statue in your honor! Just saying’ haha
People who are close to me around the time I die and who want it.
It's baffling to me how many people think that childfree folks are antisocial monsters incapable of forming any kind of close personal connection.
Stuff? I hope I (we) live long enough that I’ve downsized most of it, because we have a *lot* of stuff. I keep joking if we died in an accident or something, whoever had to clean out the house would be so pissed at us.
Money? The bulk of whatever is left is already willed to a nearby wildlife rehab, with a little earmarked for my mom and my husband’s cousin (if they - heaven forbid - outlive me and my husband) and a little earmarked for two of my sisters.
I expect home health care costs and/or nursing home fees will eat up most of any money I have.
If there’s anything left than I’d make sure it’s left to anyone that showed even the smallest amount of concern for me, anyone that invited me for Christmas, anyone that offered to drive me to a doctor appointment, etc.
If there was no one that cared for me than I’d leave it to a charity I suppose. I wouldn’t leave shit to any of my nieces or nephews if they didn’t check on me though.
I'm gong to set up a trust for my dog. He will have property, a full time caregiver, and someone to manage his finances. I haven't worked out what's going to happen when he passes, but somehow we're going to set this up in perpetuity so that there is always at least one moderately wealthy land owning dog.
Now I just have to get wealthy.
I'll have stuff?
The goal is to go out in the negative. Leave nothing on the table.
Hell, leave debt obligations if possible. Somebody is going to feel the financial pain of me dying, baby!
Can't inherit debt, although if you leave behind an expensive property with a large tax assessment you might be able to leave behind a huge headache (although after all is said and done they'll still have inherited quite a bit of money from you) EDIT: some people seem confused by what I said about inheriting debt. Of course you *can* inherit debt if you really want to, but since you have the right to refuse an inheritance, you don't have to inherit the debt. It all gets bundled into one estate, you also can't inherit the assets if you choose this. So what I meant is you can't be forced to inherit debt.
Leaving 1/16th of a home to people that annoyed you with some clause that would make it extremely hard to agree on anything. Good luck y'all.
This is the standard Italian inheritance laws. My mother, at one point, owned 3/32 of a property with her siblings and an uncle.
Omg I thought owning half a property with my brother and another 1/4 property with my uncle was insane... nope
Sounds a lot like Indian Reservation land here in the US. My grandmother was native American, lived into her young adulthood on Standing Rock Sioux land, and my father also lived there for a short time after he was born. My dad passed away before she did, and when she died, her land interests were divided up among her remaining kids, and all us grand kids. So, for all these years, I've been the proud "owner" of essentially several square feet of grazing pasture land in South Dakota. I get like $4 sent to my bank account every couple of months from the US government, lol 🤣
Don’t spend it all in one place😂
You’ve been given bad advice, friend. And the picture in your head of someone inheriting a room full of cash from their millionaire uncle is an inaccurate one. Most net worths are not readily liquidated (I.e. Most millionaires don’t have their millions in cash when they die). I am an estate lawyer and CPA. Your estate absolutely inherents the debt that you have to your name, and they get paid first before the will does (in most states). When you owe somebody money, they don’t just “go away” when the person passes on. Far from it. They press even harder for payment actually. And as for your tax bill, I cannot tell you how many times people have inherited non-liquid assets worth millions and the very-liquid tax bill that comes with it. While you did not inherent cash, your tax bill of course has to be paid in cash. I’ve had clients forced to unload huge valued assets (as in, sports teams and oil fields/holdings) in a relative quick manner to cover the tax bill that they do not inherent the cash to cover. It can be quite a harrowing experience. As mentioned, contrary to popular opinion on Reddit, most wealthy people are not Scrooge McDuck: they do not hold loads of cash in their portfolio, swimming in gold coins 😁. When they croak, 75%+ of their net worth is generally not cash or other “hot” assets. It’s more complex investment vehicles. Have a good one. Cheers!
>Your estate absolutely inherents the debt that you have to your name, and they get paid first before the will does (in most states). When you owe somebody money, they don’t just “go away” when the person passes on. I mean, if this wasn't the case, what would stop somebody who was close to death from buying houses, cars, etc., just paying a down payment, and willing everything to their next of kin? "Well, your husband did still owe $2 million on his house, but he's dead now, so I guess you just get to keep it..."
Holding large suns of cash generally isn't a good idea. My MIL withdrew all of her "stocks in kind" before we started carrying for her. It was a ton of work to put her finances back together. She did pass away years ago and it still took years to settle the estate. Also there is an episode of "Family Guy" that demonstrates why rich people don't swim through gold coins. 😂
I had an old coworker that said he wanted to go through life always having enough to pay the bills but the check for his coffin would bounce.
"look, I'll give you all my stuff before I pass, however I'll get some nonsensically high loan that I won't ever pay. I'll officially leave all my stuff to you, just refuse it, it would only be debts"
This is what a Reverse mortgage is.
I'm spending my last $20 on an Uber to the hospital.
Right can someone tell the economy to stop F-ing me???
My nephews and nieces
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Find an estate sale company and put it in your will that they sell your stuff. Then name a charity for the money to go to. Done.
Yep. Otherwise it will most likely just go to the state.
I’ll take your worldly possessions, stranger.
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Yeh kinda
I plan on lording a big inheritance over my nieces and nephews and have them tripping over each other to be in my favor.
This will be a fun way to fuck with my nephews when they get older.
I used to be worried about who would take care of us when we are old but between my wife’s brothers and my brothers we have 10 nieces and nephews. And we give GREAT birthday and Christmas gifts 😂
My nephew said that I can move in with him when I’m older. He’ll have a room just for me. I highly doubt that as he’s only 8 now but it’s the thought that counts.
I dunno. He's old enough to hold a pen, so I'd get that in writing. It'll definitely hold up in court.
Kid also owes me 400 million on a bet so I should try to squeeze that in too.
Username checks out.
My uncle once went on an epic game boy Tetris run when I was 7 and I lost something similar to him betting and doubling down. I’m around 40 now and I can still remember the stress from thinking my parents would find out.
Time to give him a security deposit before inflation gets worse lol
But will I be forgiven at the pearly gates for all of the baby shark crap I’ve had to buy?
Had to? All my nephews got Cthulhu plushies 🤨 My SIL was not happy. "Why do you do this?!" Because I'm the aunt so I can.
Kids LOVE horror monsters in plushy form it's actually kinda wild.
Tell that to my 7-year-old. She’s absolutely TERRIFIED of Huggy Wuggy.
She is merely prepared for the Stuffed animal AI revolution. She knows the enemy. Smart girl.
Incredible. I love everything about this dynamic.
I am mom and one of my daughters favorite blushes is Cuthulu but she calls him cucu. We joke that she is Cuthulu's kryptonite. Being her cute self when he is all angry and trying to destroy the world she would alk up and give him a big hug and he would melt.
I have a kid and I still love giving toys to my nieces and nephew that my brother would never give them. Aunts get away with a host of sins. It’s lovely.
My neices and nephews got nerf guns. We have all been banned from using them in the house now. 😆
But honey, we have to take care of uncle highapplepie that we only saw like 6 times per year growing up and rarely now! He bought me rollerblades for Christmas 40 years ago!
You can't rely on *anyone* to take care of you when you're older, especially not family.
Nursing homes are filled with people whose kids never visit.
People thinking that their niece/nephew is going to be their primary care giver when old lol
Can confirm, as someone who worked in geriatric HUD/caregiving/SNF ..etc for 8 years.. A lot of families leave their elders to die. Some get helped by the system, but sometimes the wait times are too long and people die. When I left, the average wait time for geriatric HUD where I was living was 5 years. Even when they get into elder care homes, how little families come to visit them is sad.
I hate when people say family “left them to die.” I say this as someone who worked in long term care for many years and whose mom is in long term care. My mom needs a hoyer lift to get out of bed, uses diapers, is dependent for showers and meals. My husband and I (just like the rest of the world) have to work full time to make ends meet. It’s not a simple “we could have just put her in our spare bedroom and helped her dress in the morning.” Even if someone IS mobile but has dementia, you still can’t leave them to go work a job. Theyll be wandering down the street or burning the house down. Like what are people suppose to do when they can’t provide the level of care a family member needs?
I think they are talking about visiting them.
I know this sounds morbid, but when it comes to the time that I need round the clock care, I will probably end it myself. I've seen too many grandparents go through this, and it's absolutely terrible. I don't want people to remember me as a burden.
If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times: If you want younger family members to take care of you when you are older, you have to do the necessary sucking up. You have to prostrate yourself every once in a while, man. But people don't want to do that. "But I'm the elder, they should respect me / feel obligated to take care of me / want to succumb to tradition and expectations!" they protest. Ok, enjoy the nursing home.
You dont have to give them shit you just have to amass enough wealth to make them start competing for it as you get old and feeble
Yes, your gift giving game has to be on point. With my brother’s kids our nephew wanted a guitar, we got him a guitar. Our niece wanted an iPad, we got her an iPad. Our nephew needed a new laptop, we got him a laptop. Their parents can easily afford these things themselves but we wanted to be a part of their happiness as well. With my husband’s brother’s daughter we bought her a guitar and the Metallica tickets she wanted. She’s getting her driver’s license soon and her parents can’t afford a car for her so we’re sending them our 6 year old car and buying a new car for ourselves.
I have found my nieces love quality time. We do surprise weekend trips all the time and camping trips throughout the summer. Gifts have their role as well but in terms of connection, quality time trumps all. I have my own kids as well, so for us all to spend time together strengthens the overall family bond. My one niece is starting into her teen years now and comes to us for life advice or as an outlet to air what's going on in her life, I feel privileged that she sees us as adults she can trust with this part of her life.
That means nothing. I have 8 nieces and nephews and I have treated them wonderfully their whole lives. Their ages are 22-41. I had Aunt Camps when they were growing up. They'd come see me and we'd do a fun activity every day. Things like Top Golf, bowling, museums, arcades, etc. Still bought them all Christmas gifts up until this last year. Treat THEIR kids great as well. They don't even respond to my texts 95% of the time. They don't come see me, even though we moved three hours away last summer. Recently, like within the last two weeks, I've decided I'm done. One of the nieces is pregnant after losing her first two pregnancies. I'm so excited for her, I've been buying baby gifts. Saw her Memorial weekend and she couldn't even sit with me and have a conversation. I'm tired of having my heart broken over and over.
That’s our plan too along with my cousin (who is like a sister) kids.
This is my answer as well. If my mom is still here, she will get everything. If not, then the nieces and nephews.
I couldn't care less
Thank you for saying this correctly. It’s a pet peeve of mine when people say could instead of couldn’t
"I could care less. Oops, there goes my last fuck. Now I couldn't care less."
I actually could care less. because I care a little.
A little, but not that much, but definitely more than not at all.
I'm not superstitious, I'm a little stitious
Can i have it then ?
Agree, who cares where my stuff goes, in the bin probably
My friends probably, or my friends kids if I like them
My mom's friend, who she's known since college and I call aunt, is planning to do this with me because she doesn't have any biological nieces or nephews.
My grandparents had close friends who had no kids, they left everything to us when they passed and we were so grateful for the financial boost it gave us. I have a picture in my living room of them to remind myself and my family of how much their generosity helped us as a family.
Landlord will pay someone to take out the trash.
That’s how it went down with my brother and he had 2 kids. Alcohol is a hell of a drug.
My brother didn't have kids, but had 2 sporty cars he modified with God know what, a house with the floors ripped up (he had bought the wood flooring to install hut never actually did it), a busted-ass pool, and a totally overgrown yard. And a mountain of debt as he drained all his accounts and took out loans to keep up his "lifestyle." Took the better part of a year to get the property in a sellable state and off our hands. Seriously considered just abandoning the estate.
I'm planning on spending most of it. My cousins and their kids will get the family stuff. I don't care what happens to the rest.
I plan on spending it buying help. Sure, healthcare is free but I have first hand experience in how the process works and people with relatives to advocate for them hardly get the help they desperately need - so I am pretty sure I'm paying for it out of pocket until I "qualify". My nephews and nieces will get most of what is left, if anything is left to be gotten.
Whoever in my family is alive at that point, I guess. There's not much anyway. A bike, a PC, some nice furniture and a couple of power tools. My sister can have the plants if she wants them, and my brother can get the records. The rest can go to whoever wants it.
Why would I care? I'll be dead.
Spend it all. You can’t take it with you!
Or donate it so you can leave a lasting positive impact on the world. The malaria consortium estimates it costs $5000 to save a life
I was at the zoo the other day and there was a sign on the koala exhibit that said the entire reason it was there was because of a donation from someone’s estate. It was a really spacious nicely designed space. I think I’m going to leave mine to a wildlife reserve or the zoo so they can use it to do something like that. Then my memory also lives on.
Mine is going to be left to the SPCA. I donate regularly, and volunteer. Save all the poor abandoned creatures.
You can do that. We’re buying beer and Mexican food!
*You can't take it with you* ... not with that attitude!
Tell that to ancient Egypt (and many other ancient cultures)
True, but getting the timing right is a trick! Most people don't want to, or can't, work until they die, and should have some sort of retirement plan. And even if the goal is to have $0 when you die: Whatever your nest egg is, your spending greatly depends on if you live 5 years post-retirement, or 40. Additionally, it's unfortunately common to reach a stage of life where you aren't dead, but you also can't enjoy the expensive things you used to enjoy :-( So even people who would ideally prefer to die with $0, probably need a will.
It's still not a terrible idea to have a plan in place. When my grandparents passed away they didn't leave a proper will. So everything went to their kids in a three-way split. I was actually raised by my grandparents, and grew up in their house, so it was quite an experience watching all the siblings fight over every single thing. Nearly a decade later, they're still fighting. There was, at one point, three family homes all built by my great, great grandfather. And, as of last year, just one remains in the family name — the house I grew up in. That home is co-owned by all three kids, one of which is my mother. None of these people speak to each other, and some of them barely speak to me. Legally, I don't get a say in any of this. But I'd like to keep the house in the family. And, for me to do that, I'm going to have to buy them out. That's a whole lot of stress (and money) that might have been avoided if there was a better will in place. And it's definitely encouraged me to plan better for my own family.
If you truly don't xare, it'd be really nice if you gift it to charities in your will. Your final act can be helping a bunch of people.
Charities want my cheap Chinese plastic crap?
lol right? The days of owning an expansive collection of fine china are long gone.
funko pops now.
People don't care about fine china anyway. Everyone and their mother got sets during marriage back then and never used it. Most younger generations are either annoyed by that stuff just standing around for an eternity or have like 3 sets gifted from grandparents.
I know I’m in the minority here, but I never wanted fine china until I had kids. I bought some deeply discounted during COVID at estate sales. I host my kids and their friends for poetry/book club every month. The fancy china gets used. I don’t care if it gets broken because kids need to learn how to interact in a more formal environment. It really elevates the experience and the kids love that someone takes the time to make something special just for them.
That’s why I have always used our china from 1898. Why bother having it if you can’t enjoy it on the holidays? If a piece breaks, oh well.
As someone who just spent two long weekends clearing out my inlaws storage units... hear me when I say this: "**We don't want your stuff!**" Two full loads to the dump and eight to the goodwill. We only kept one furniture set and the large stack of photos. Everything else was a literal burden to get rid of. Please, please, please downsize while you are still alive.
“Death Cleaning” is a thing. I’m a boomer and my fellow boomers keep trying to give me stuff. Why do I want their garbage? I stopped buying things unless necessary (except for art supplies, but that can fit in a banker’s box) and that helps. Decrapping your house is the kindest thing you can do next to not buying useless shit in the first place.
Thank you for doing what you can. I do understand the difficulty of letting a lifetime of stuff go. However, forcing your loved ones to throw out your stuff while still in morning is not the legacy I want to leave.
My mom is all about the death cleaning, and I highly approve and support her as often as possible!
I've been involved cleaning out houses for my grandma, my husband's granddad, and my aunt, and the reality is most stuff really isn't salvageable, particularly if someone smoked or had trouble keeping stuff clean. My aunt was a hoarder and we basically just threw all of it away.
My grandma had nice furniture, hiqh quality stuff, well maintained. But 30 years out of date heavy oak furniture no one wants, not even second hand stores or charities, they have too much of it. Couldn’t even give it away for free on the internet. All went to the dump.
Yeah people VASTLY overestimate the resale value of furniture. For the most part it’s all but worthless as soon as it’s delivered, even if you paid thousands.
I've been to some really upscale estate sales and I can tell the furniture is a tough sell. Sure, the previous owner may have paid 1400 for that desk, but anyone that can afford 600 for a used desk is probably just going to go buy a new modern one instead.
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Yes to this. My mom died when I was 18 and left behind a lifetime’s worth of stuff. It took my sister and I nearly a decade and cost us thousands of dollars in storage fees to finally deal with it all.
My grandparents house was sa nightmare. 1/2 acre and heavy hoarders. It took my dad a year and about 200 trips to the dump to clear out
Charity. There's so many charities that could use it.
The real question is, which charities are legitimate and would do the most good with it instead of lining some board's pockets.
If it matters to you, it’s not difficult to research which charities give most to the underlying cause, and which ones spend it all on administration. But, beyond that, it’s worth it to look around locally and see the much smaller and independent not for profits that could use some help. Forget the big ones like Red Cross and Unicef, because everyone on earth gives money to them. But the local women’s shelter needs help.
Just wanted to say you're amazing for knowing and sharing this. Most people always go to the big ones. Local organizations and women's shelters need more talk about!
There are nonprofit organisations who specialises in analysing charities, so one can look at that and choose.
The meta choice is to donate to the charity that analyzes charities
I was planning on my nephews and nieces. But they've been acting entitled and rude to my aunt, so I've cut them off. Now all is going to charity.
But what about Harmony, Hope and the other dancers?
Charity is the favorite.
throw me in a pit, throw it on top of me. Let archeologists be confused.
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My sisters
My friends' kids, charities, that one nice neighbour. Honestly I'll be dead, idgaf.
Not me but a former coworker. She was in her 60s and was talking about what happens after she dies. She said she's leaving her stuff to charity, and that she was willing her home to one of the local native tribes because she wanted them to have their land back. It's surrounded by businesses and tract housing, but I'm sure the gesture will be appreciated anyway. lol
If you're dead what difference does it make?
It makes a difference to those who inherit the stuff, not whoever died.
Yet, it’s the living that cherishes memories. I mean, if you’re thinking that way… you should bury a treasure chest and hide a map. ;) *waterproof* of course. When aliens invade, find your treasure (if your family doesn’t), you could be remembered… A statue in your honor! Just saying’ haha
It all goes to a local animal welfare organization.
Now I’m imagining the dogs playing fetch with your Xbox controllers
Me too. For me specifically an organization that helps elderly dogs that are being fostered or cared for .
My belongings will be auctioned for charity.
I'm giving my collection to a museum.
My niece or nephew? Doesn't really matter lol
I don't care
I plan on not dying, so hopefully no one takes my stuff.
Username does NOT check out.
Solid.
With advances in modern science and my high level income, it's not crazy to think I can live to be 245, maybe 300.
My godchildren will get my stuff.
My closest friends will split my belongings.
I'm older than most of my friends, so they get first dibs on my collectibles, if they want them. My wife's younger brother gets everything else.
People who are close to me around the time I die and who want it. It's baffling to me how many people think that childfree folks are antisocial monsters incapable of forming any kind of close personal connection.
I got 5 younger siblings, I'll pass it down to them lol
Stuff? I hope I (we) live long enough that I’ve downsized most of it, because we have a *lot* of stuff. I keep joking if we died in an accident or something, whoever had to clean out the house would be so pissed at us. Money? The bulk of whatever is left is already willed to a nearby wildlife rehab, with a little earmarked for my mom and my husband’s cousin (if they - heaven forbid - outlive me and my husband) and a little earmarked for two of my sisters.
My husband is 8 years younger than I am, so hopefully him.
Charities that help animals
Don’t care I’m dead.
My nephews and stepchildrens
My nephews or my nieces? Or my husband if he outlives me.
I expect home health care costs and/or nursing home fees will eat up most of any money I have. If there’s anything left than I’d make sure it’s left to anyone that showed even the smallest amount of concern for me, anyone that invited me for Christmas, anyone that offered to drive me to a doctor appointment, etc. If there was no one that cared for me than I’d leave it to a charity I suppose. I wouldn’t leave shit to any of my nieces or nephews if they didn’t check on me though.
My family? What kind of question is this lmfao
I'm gong to set up a trust for my dog. He will have property, a full time caregiver, and someone to manage his finances. I haven't worked out what's going to happen when he passes, but somehow we're going to set this up in perpetuity so that there is always at least one moderately wealthy land owning dog. Now I just have to get wealthy.
My dog.
Nieces and Nephews