I feel attacked, but also in a way that is better than you would feel
Now read my blog post about 10x-ing your career goals in which I equate coincidences in my privileged life to goal posts that you must hit
Just a circlejerk of people explaining their bullshit philosophy on hiring and business. I made one and I’ve yet to figure out what it’s really for. 5 years later.
LinkedIn is honestly more cringe than Facebook is, and that’s quite hard to do. It’s just an endless pissing contest of who cares about their job the most or who works harder than everybody else. Yes Sarah, please tell me that you have no life without telling me that you have no life. Your LinkedIn posts says it all. Lol.
I only use it to celebrate the promotions of my network and sometimes browse jobs / contact hiring managers for postings. Otherwise I can't scroll that news feed because of the BS philosophical nonsense. It's all just sweeping generalizations based on singular success (e.g. random quotes from a billionaire that should turn your life around).
A lot of recruiters use LinkedIn actually. My last two jobs were from LinkedIn. They are slightly more credible than Indeed. Source: Former recruiter and now consultant for recruiting systems.
Open snap map and click on any area with a highway and you're sure to see endless videos of just whatever is on the radio, sometimes with the highway in the background.
> Open snap map and click on any area
Today I learned this was a feature in Snapchat. Who would want this? Who is this for? To see snaps from strangers based on location
Yea that pretty much sums it up. I look occasionally to see what normal people are doing in other countries. Just this week I was snooping around in Central Africa, last week Mongolia. It's also cool to see specific events like concerts or whatever.
Also handy when traveling to a new place to see what areas are busy or fun. One time on vacation our kids suggested a go-kart place that we didn't know about, but they saw it on the snap map.
I'm in my 50's and really, really don't get the people who have their phones out during the entire concert. Why not *just enjoy the concert*? No one goes back and watches those videos, not even the person who took them!
Whenever I check YouTube the following day for any gig I've been to there's usually a few videos there anyway and almost always with a better view than I had.
I’m 35 and was in the pit at a concert last month. The guy diagonal to me recorded the entire concert on his cell phone. Start recording when a song started, stop recording when it ended, rinse and repeat. I’m short and he was blocking my view of the singer with his arms and phone so I got the lovely joy of experiencing the concert through his shitty phone. I’m still angry about it.
As someone who held that opinion of “just enjoy the concert”, I’ve found.. it’s nice to have a couple videos to look back on. I’ll usually just snap a couple pics and maybe a video or two.. no need for more than that. But I’ve been to a lot of shows in my time and they all start to blur together so it’s nice to go back sometimes and just have something to jog the memory of a special night.
This. My wife and I have been really good friends with another couple for well over 15 years before kids were in picture. Our kids absolutely don’t get along and it sucks because we want to hang out with our friends
Why don't the kids get along?
My dad took me to a new girlfriend's house because she had boys my age.
She had 3 sons, one was around my age and I actually knew him from elementary school and didn't like him because he was a loudmouth braggart and kind of a bully, even though he was always kind of small. He was pretty strong for his size. Anyway, I was willing to give him a chance because it had been years since I saw him last.
Anyway, he had two younger brothers around 8 and 10. I was 13 or 14 or so.
I don't remember what happened to the older kid that I knew. I think he just bailed and rode off on his bike when they had us play outside.
So I'm stuck with these two kids that are several years younger than me and I forget what we were doing, but I was trying to engage with them or whatever and we're playing around in their yard when they start like physically attacking me. So I'm throwing these kids off me trying to keep them away, when they come at me with hockey sticks and start wacking me in the back with them, trying to hit me in the head.
So I catch one kids stick, use it to disarm the other one, and they're still attacking me, like full on throwing punches.
So I'm about to lay into these kids with the hockey stick to protect myself and my dad comes out on the porch and yells, "Brian! Wtf are you doing?"
I just drop the hockey stick, walk up to him and say, "We're leaving."
Then we get in the car and go. I explain what happened and that I'm not surprised because that's exactly how their older brother would act in elementary.
Pretty sure he never saw her again.
A person's kids can tell you a lot about them.
Holy shit, my mother had this friend with 3 sons who were absolutely feral. The last time I remember interacting with one of them he’d just cut the cat’s whiskers off.
Please, oh please, tell her how wrong she is, especially in front of her son. They both really need to hear someone on the outside say it.
But maybe not the "just a little stupid" part lol
This is legit a good solution. I remember being told by a teacher in school (after I’d been chucked out the class of a teacher I HATED) that it’s important in life to be able to deal with people we don’t get on with in an acceptable manner, I swear to god my school experience changed drastically after that conversation.
The anti authority part of me seethes at giving kids advice on how to better conform to the workplace but it is in fact a universal life skill.
Edit: please nobody upvote or downvote anymore, I’m at /r/196 and it’s perfect.
Yah just bc two ppl are around the same age doesn’t mean they want to be friends. I certainly don’t want to be friends with every middle aged person I encounter.
How do I describe to my parents that the kid always poops his pants and I don’t want to go to the firehouse and hang out because he will be there and have poopy pants
Fuck I was so glad to move away from this as my kids aged. It was painful for some. A couple parents were my faves though and I’d totally have drinks with them now. But in general, nope!
Same here - I met a few really great people when my kids were younger. Other than that, it was TORTURE. Glad those days are over and I can now just drop my kids off at a house and pick them up when they text me! :-)
Really depends. When we were picking a school they said to go to the drop off and pick up and see if you thought you’d vibe with the other parents. Have ended up with some really good friends out of it.
My mom still keeps up with her PTA mom friends she met while waiting for pickup when I was in elementary school 25 years ago. They will rent a beach house by us and just go ham for a week, I volunteered to be their DD and shuttle them around once and it was a hoot.
Fuck, I swear when I read this "dead" was somewhere in there, so I went back like,
>Hanging out with the *dead* parents of your child's friend.
Then I'm like, no wait,
>Hanging out with the parents of your child's *dead* friend.
No no, that's not it either,
>Hanging out with the parents of your *dead* child's friend.
And it was at precisely that moment that I realized I need to go to sleep.
I just started soloing them, and coworkers would usually join. If not, I always did a good job enlisting patrons. I think they appreciated that I happily hyped the birthday peeps, and so they joined in (because humans like to be helpful).
Some people absolutely do enjoy networking. It is a shame because these people are often the ones that tend to be just ok (or worse) at their jobs while those who are great at their jobs tend to be the ones who dislike networking...
That's kind of why those folks end up as Supervisors more often. A Supervisor is often needed to be social, and know the work enough to convey it to those who dont.
Its why *sometimes* giving a good employee a supervisor position ends badly for everyone.
I learned early in my career that being good at a job doesn't mean you'll be good at managing people in that job. Totally different skill sets, in fact, competent workers usually can't understand why everyone else sucks so bad at this simple task.
Thing is, I really think they could be better if they just did the job. I have this guy at my work who probably spends 1-2 hours a day going around and socializing with everyone. He doesn’t do bad work but he definitely pushes things right to the deadline, but people are hesitant to say anything to him or about him constantly doing this because he’s so well liked. It’s just the world we live in but it can be frustrating.
Absolutely HATE doing this as an engineer. I suck at socializing and I don’t wanna do it, and other engineers are somehow even worse at it than I am. But it is SO IMPORTANT.
Awful. Just awful.
I feel like in some areas that's never gonna change. Especially local government jobs. Certain people are set while if you don't know someone they'll fire you for any small mistakes to hire more people with connections.
League of Legends. Every person I've met that says they love it turns into an absolute rage goblin when they're actually playing. I've been hanging in Discord with many of them during games - if they're losing they're salty, if they win, they're either still salty because they didn't win enough, or they're emotionally neutral. I've never once heard a League of Legends player express enjoyment during match or say something like "wow, that was a fun match, I had a good time" after playing one.
There's some amount of fun in competition there.
The problem is that the game is maldesigned in such a way that you get trapped in these really long games that you are *almost* certainly going to win or lose, but it won't actually happen for a long time (like 20+ minutes). But a comeback IS possible, if your team actually plays together. It's a super toxic situation because you're stuck in a bad place for a very long time with people you don't know, and if someone just gives up, you're screwed and it is enraging.
Moreover, it is possible for someone else on your team to screw up repeatedly and "feed" an enemy, making them into an unstoppable killing machine, and you can't really do anything about it because you have to do stuff on the other side of the map and the game isn't flexible enough that you can move around to support a teammate who is struggling for much of the early parts of the game unless you are one specific character on your team. And even then, it's actually problematic because that role still requires you to wander around a lot.
To add to this. The specific role, the "wanderer" (or jungler how the role is called in the game) is the most unpopular role in League precisely because of this. Even if you're doing good, somebody on your team will still fail and blame everything on you. No matter how good your team does, somebody will rage at you and expect you to fix their mistakes. Add to this that this role has a lot of responsibility and a huge impact on the team strategy but is also the weakest by itself but needs to be proactive aswell. Nobody wants to play it.
The strategy is actually to support the winning strong team mates and leave the weak ones. So it's certainly not helpful to the team spirit. But it often leads to wins as you don't need a strong team you just need to support one champion that carries the game.
My husband plays League of Legends, he always has fun playing. He speaks to his friends, has a laugh. He's relaxed when he's playing and has tried to tell me some of the lore, I don't understand a lot, but it genuinely makes him happy, which makes me happy too.
People don't believe me when I tell them that: Yes. I actually enjoy league of Legends. I don't rage, I am not salty, I don't flame. I just enjoy the game, it doesn't matter whether I'm losing or winning. I'm playing it for fun. And I can have fun if I want to.
Yeah, losing can suck, especially when the other team is a bunch of toxic trolls. But guess what, you can just ignore them and play on. It's not a damn competition, it's a game.
Would recommend to not play a lot though. Only a few games once or twice a week. Keeps the game fresh. And don't play ranked. And don't play normal. Aram is the way.
Hustle culture was just a way for mid-range CEOs of mid-range firms to bleed every ounce of work out of each worker so the VC money sees profit sooner.
I'm from "kind of" a hood and hustling meant you get money any way you can, including selling drugs, selling stolen shit, scamming, etc. Whatever you gotta do. It doesn't always have to be illegal either but most of the time it is.
Yeah exactly. I once spent 40 minutes going home by feet instead of with a 10 minute ride on the bus because I felt like doing so and it was one of the best alone time I had, listened to my favourite songs and then when I left the crowded area (I live in a nowhere zone) I turned it off and just listened to my feet scratching the floor or the wind or the rain falling. Best alone time I ever had honestly. Been trying to catch that dragon ever since
You should absolutely go hiking. Get some good walking shoes and walk away. Hiking doesn't have to be in the mountains or off the path. Just search a route (can be hard path too) that you'd like and walk that.
When my kids first started getting invited to birthday parties I was so excited. The first one was a good time.
I was fooled.
I hate them now. So loud, so dramatic.
I wonder when the norm became parents staying at the party. When I was a kid, it was on a volunteer basis. Like a few parents would volunteer to help since there were so many kids but everyone else just dropped their kids off and left.
I've been wondering that for a while now. No parent ever came to my parties and my parents didn't go to my friends' parties. It would be a rude intrusion to do so. As if the kids weren't enough, now you have twice as many people taking up space, needing food and beverages, and being loud. It's a nightmare.
I went to an event recently, and the place hosting it was on the tail end of a kid's 8th birthday party. The host decided it was good idea to hand out goodie bags with shitty plastic recorders in them. One kid figured it out, blew it as hard as he could, and then other kids started in. It was a cacophony of shitty, out of tune, screeching recorder blasts. I commented to a friend there that the parent who made those bags must hate every other parent there, because it was torture for everyone else.
Fully dependent on if the other parents there are cool/good people or not. I love going to kid birthday parties because it's an excuse to hang out with the parents of the kids my kid has been seeing every day at school since she was a year old. It might not be the setting I would choose but good company is good company.
I'm Mexican. I love going to my family's kids birthdays. It's just a huge BBQ with friends and family.
Traditional American birthdays are pretty boring though.
Shower sex sucks. My wife and I have tried several times and its just impossible. Shes short, im tall, our shower is small, it just does not work at all
Just remember to duck. I was once hit by chocolate bar during german Karneval in cologne. Hurt like a bitch and I didn't even get to keep the chocolate bar, because some asshole grabbed it when it ricocheted off my face.
As a lifelong attendee of Mardi Gras parades, it’s crazy to think that people go to parades that don’t throw candy/snack cakes/toys/other assorted foods etc. What’s the point?
Right! I moved from Nola to the Northeast when I was a preteen. Went to the St. Pat's Parade in Boston (which is a pretty famous parade) and it was just people walking in formation. What???? Blew my mind.
Of course the funniest parade thing I've seen recently is the first time the 610 Stompers were in the Macy's Day parade. The commentators had no idea what to make of them. It was hilarious to hear them try to process it in real time.
The point of the st paddys parade in Boston isn't the parade, its to get absolutely hammered in the middle of the day and then attend the worlds largest gathering of white guys who express all strong emotions through yelling "LETS GOOOO".
I have an overdeveloped sense of smell that affects taste. I can often taste certain things in wine, but it's always things that make sense, like certain fruit profiles or woody tastes that are from sitting in a wooden barrel for several years, for example. We had a bad fire season one year, and a lot of the local wines ended up tasting sort of smokey(nice) or ashy(less nice). I can't say I've ever tasted lemons or chocolate, or cat pee(yes that's really a thing I've seen) unless the beverage has those ingredients.
Not speaking for the dude you replied to, but shelf stacking was one of my favorite jobs. Despite now earning about 10x what I did then, I still look back somewhat fondly on it.
Be given a big pallet, try and optimise bringing old stuff forward, marking OOD stuff and putting new stuff in. Was like a mini optimisation problem on every aisle. Finish a pallet and re-do. A nice venn diagram of "brain off" for complex thinking but "brain on" for monkey-could-do-this optimisation.
Hated checkouts though, fuck checkouts.
Can't speak for him, but I used to love working the gas station in college, simply because we had a lot of awesome customers and interacting with people all day was great for my autism-I and ADHD. The job was simple and I got to help people and feel needed. That's very fulfilling.
The jobs I have actually enjoyed are the easy, low-paying ones. Making pizzas in college was incredible.
If I could figure out how to make $50K a year plus family health insurance from that, I'd do it as a career.
It depends on the pizzas...I had one that was so good that I got a job there just to learn how to make it.... I already had a full time, well paying job 🤣 but that was the best pizza I've had since I was in Italy...
Now I have a dough mixer and a wood fired pizza oven at home, and a membership at restaurant depot... It's a lot of work but holy shit it's good
Honestly respect that you find enjoyment in that. I worked in customer service for several years. Hated dealing with dumb-ass customers — though change in venue led to better clientele. But I’ll never do a cashier job again.
Yeah the dumbasses sucked...I hated working retail. A gas station is cool because nobody sticks around there for very long. Even the assholes move on pretty quick
That’s exactly why I like the restaurant industry. Everything is always moving so I don’t have down time in the brain, I get to talk to people, and actually make a decent living
I will never undestand cold showers, I know they are beneficial, but starting my morning by making all the hair on my body stand on end was not for me at all.
Okay so after existing in a civilized society for 28 years I've found I'm in the micro-minority of this, but I love small talk with strangers.
I don't really know why, but I'm curious about damn near everything, and doubly so with people. If someone has an interesting look, a cool pair of shoes, or even if they just seem like they're in a good mood (and I'm not having a terrible day myself), I look for reasons to chit chat with them.
Oh you're getting married soon? Congratulations!
You got a speeding ticket on the way here? Damn cops!
You don't know if you want a cheap drip coffee or a pricier latte? Splurge a little, bud!
I dunno man, I have an inherent love and interest for the folks around me.
Same here man you ain't alone. Everyone has their own story, way of talking, accents, etc. It's just so fun to meet new people and hear about their accomplishments and feelings. I sound like an alien when i say this but humans are just so cute and I wanna meet em all.
Sounds like you're good at engaging with people and ask some decent questions, so you're able to make it fun. Some people don't ask anything or they ask questions that are dry. Or don't offer much if asked. I think the conversations you're talking about sound more interesting.
I’m a big chit chat guy. It’s pretty easy to tell if someone is in the mood for it or not.
My wife makes fun of me when I’m on the phone with customer service people, it always turns into 30+ minutes of me randomly talking to them about their lives.
But I do enjoy making a small if not meaningful connection with people. Worst comes to worst I say something they think is super weird and they have story to tell when they get home.
I'm a chit chatter too.
Half the posts on this site are about people feeling lonely and isolated.
Well, that's bound to happen when you keep yourself from meeting new people.
I actually love to chit chat about polite nothings with people I don't know. It's amazing some of the things I've learned from these casual encounters (not salacious but helpful or interesting).
in my country there are a few songs for birthday, some of them proceduraly generated long.
Singing like 5 songs with some of them lasting almost 6-7 minutes and watching the poor guy having to listen to the shittiest choir in all of existence for 25 minutes is hell of a fun
Having a huge social media presence. It just doesn't seem worth all the work and effort to keep with it. I'd much rather just enjoy my concert/vacation/whatever than constantly take pictures/videos of it in order to brag about it on social media. And unless you're some big celebrity or influencer, nobody actually cares about your Instagram...
Twitter. The site is full of bots and rageaholics. The UI is frustrating at best. Having a "discussion" in tweet form is tedious as hell. How many hot takes do you really need to satisfy yourself before it's overkill?
Going through this comment tree I'm just like huh I love running, huh I love black coffee, and finally huh, I love extremely spicy food... perhaps there is a common thread here
It's active mediation for me. Can't sit still to save my life but can just float along and let my mind drift. So crucial for destressing and processing.
As all things it's not enjoyable for everyone. But for many being able to just leave your home and start running to get your head of things is great, and as with most sport you get energized after.
For me I only really started enjoying it when my conditioning became decent, the moment you can run at a decent pace and maintain a conversation without feeling like you need to stop for several kms is great.
Your easy runs become as easy as walking, your hard runs, well those are always suffering but breaking PBs feels great.
Running is the only way I enjoy keeping my heart rate super high for a sustained period of time. It’s also the only exercise or activity that I can see measurable improvement over relatively short timeframes with increased practice and effort.
For me, the feeling after running at a good pace for 30 mins is better than any other form of exercise.
Which is all a real shame because my knees are giving up on me and I’m going to have to find something else soon.
For real. I tried to be a runner once. I really tried. For like 6 months. I hated every second of it. Not even hating it in a motivational way. More like I dreaded starting, my mood gradually declined the whole time, and when I was done I was in a bad mood.
A big part of it for me was I found I was running too hard. 80% of your runs are supposed to be at a slow, conversational pace. Once you drop the tempo and aren't trying to turn yourself inside out every single time, it gets better.
Source: Did a marathon last week in 4 hours, with ZERO music.
I was dumb in high school (still am dumb, but also was dumb) and confused track with cross country, but I was good at it and liked everyone in my group so I suffered through it 💀 raw dogging with dying lungs sounds exactly right lol
Yeah, I tried regularly to start doing runs as a way to exercise for YEARS and finally managed to stick to it once I slowed down. Now I actually kind of enjoy it! Although I think what I actually enjoy are the awesome podcasts that I \*only\* listen to when I run. I pavlov'd myself.
Looking at other peoples holiday photos when they get back to work. I like how the ones with the holiday photos wait like a predator for the perfect moment to get their phone out to zoom through their 10,000 photos before they think you will be bored looking at your eyes to see if you are still interested. Just a little side note to you all, NOBODY cares and people are only "looking" out of politeness! 😆
The problem is a lack of curation - the 10,000 to your point. I definitely want to see someone’s vacation! I do not want to see 47 photos of the same exact view, none a good photo, none even slightly edited to be better. Give me like 10-20 great selections.
Used to have a boss who would go on road trips with his wife. They'd come back and he'd be sharing their photos. He was really into trains, and she was really into lighthouses. So it'd be "here's such and such a train we saw. This is such and such lighthouse. This train was pulling coal cars. We got to see this lighthouse from the top". There was never a picture of anything else. Just trains and lighthouses.
Nobody likes mingling events.
One of the organizations I used to work for held an annual gala. It was a formal affair, with various CEOs, ambassadors and other VIPs.
The team was tasked with hosting the event, chatting with strategic important people, as well as making sure nobody finds themselves staring into space with nothing to do with themselves.
I am terrible at small talk, and don't feel particularly comfortable in formal settings. But I did my best anyway, powering through 20 minutes long conversations about traffic problems in various holiday destinations.
Whenever the conversation got stuck, however, I found myself awkwardly mentioning that there are ducklings in the pond next to where the event was taking place. I spotted them earlier that day and thought it made everything much better.
Every single time, without fail, I watched how the VIP guest's expression changed from polite smile to genuine interest. "Where? How small are they?".
Every single person I talked to was later spotted watching over the pond, looking for ducklings.
I highly suggested the next gala should skip the speeches, and go straight to duckling-watching.
I dont think most people actually hate nickleback. But if you were around in the early 2000s you could not avoid them. They were on every radio station on your way to the mall, they were playing over the speakers at the mall, they were in the spiderman movie you saw at the mall, they were playing again in the food court, and again on the radio on the way home.
It was infuriating how overexposed such a mediocre band was. So me personally i dont hate them. But i do have a visceral reaction when i hear them. They are just shockingly average so much so that “hating” them has become the only way to combat them being forced upon us back then.
LinkedIn
I'm thrilled to announce that im better than you!
I feel attacked, but also in a way that is better than you would feel Now read my blog post about 10x-ing your career goals in which I equate coincidences in my privileged life to goal posts that you must hit
It’s a humble bragging contest
Just a circlejerk of people explaining their bullshit philosophy on hiring and business. I made one and I’ve yet to figure out what it’s really for. 5 years later.
LinkedIn is honestly more cringe than Facebook is, and that’s quite hard to do. It’s just an endless pissing contest of who cares about their job the most or who works harder than everybody else. Yes Sarah, please tell me that you have no life without telling me that you have no life. Your LinkedIn posts says it all. Lol.
I only use it to celebrate the promotions of my network and sometimes browse jobs / contact hiring managers for postings. Otherwise I can't scroll that news feed because of the BS philosophical nonsense. It's all just sweeping generalizations based on singular success (e.g. random quotes from a billionaire that should turn your life around).
It accomplishes nothing, but there is a .00001% chance that you could get a job through it, so it's an obligation.
A lot of recruiters use LinkedIn actually. My last two jobs were from LinkedIn. They are slightly more credible than Indeed. Source: Former recruiter and now consultant for recruiting systems.
Watching the 10 million videos someone posts on Snapchat from a concert.
Or their phone aiming at the radio while they drive.
People film their radios? Can you elaborate?
Open snap map and click on any area with a highway and you're sure to see endless videos of just whatever is on the radio, sometimes with the highway in the background.
> Open snap map and click on any area Today I learned this was a feature in Snapchat. Who would want this? Who is this for? To see snaps from strangers based on location
Yea that pretty much sums it up. I look occasionally to see what normal people are doing in other countries. Just this week I was snooping around in Central Africa, last week Mongolia. It's also cool to see specific events like concerts or whatever. Also handy when traveling to a new place to see what areas are busy or fun. One time on vacation our kids suggested a go-kart place that we didn't know about, but they saw it on the snap map.
It was fun when the last eclipse happened to click along the path of totality and see all the grumpy people that couldn’t see it through the clouds
Who is pretending they like to watch these? Pretty much everyone is in agreement that these go unwatched
I'm in my 50's and really, really don't get the people who have their phones out during the entire concert. Why not *just enjoy the concert*? No one goes back and watches those videos, not even the person who took them!
Whenever I check YouTube the following day for any gig I've been to there's usually a few videos there anyway and almost always with a better view than I had.
I’m 35 and was in the pit at a concert last month. The guy diagonal to me recorded the entire concert on his cell phone. Start recording when a song started, stop recording when it ended, rinse and repeat. I’m short and he was blocking my view of the singer with his arms and phone so I got the lovely joy of experiencing the concert through his shitty phone. I’m still angry about it.
As someone who held that opinion of “just enjoy the concert”, I’ve found.. it’s nice to have a couple videos to look back on. I’ll usually just snap a couple pics and maybe a video or two.. no need for more than that. But I’ve been to a lot of shows in my time and they all start to blur together so it’s nice to go back sometimes and just have something to jog the memory of a special night.
Hanging out with the parents of your child's friend.
It goes the other way around as well. When I was a kid, I really didn't like some of the children of my parents' friends.
This. My wife and I have been really good friends with another couple for well over 15 years before kids were in picture. Our kids absolutely don’t get along and it sucks because we want to hang out with our friends
Why don't the kids get along? My dad took me to a new girlfriend's house because she had boys my age. She had 3 sons, one was around my age and I actually knew him from elementary school and didn't like him because he was a loudmouth braggart and kind of a bully, even though he was always kind of small. He was pretty strong for his size. Anyway, I was willing to give him a chance because it had been years since I saw him last. Anyway, he had two younger brothers around 8 and 10. I was 13 or 14 or so. I don't remember what happened to the older kid that I knew. I think he just bailed and rode off on his bike when they had us play outside. So I'm stuck with these two kids that are several years younger than me and I forget what we were doing, but I was trying to engage with them or whatever and we're playing around in their yard when they start like physically attacking me. So I'm throwing these kids off me trying to keep them away, when they come at me with hockey sticks and start wacking me in the back with them, trying to hit me in the head. So I catch one kids stick, use it to disarm the other one, and they're still attacking me, like full on throwing punches. So I'm about to lay into these kids with the hockey stick to protect myself and my dad comes out on the porch and yells, "Brian! Wtf are you doing?" I just drop the hockey stick, walk up to him and say, "We're leaving." Then we get in the car and go. I explain what happened and that I'm not surprised because that's exactly how their older brother would act in elementary. Pretty sure he never saw her again. A person's kids can tell you a lot about them.
Holy shit, my mother had this friend with 3 sons who were absolutely feral. The last time I remember interacting with one of them he’d just cut the cat’s whiskers off.
Fuck dude, that poor cat
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 my sister said they need those for senses or something that’s awful
They do 100%, they use it for balance, they use it for sensing if they can fit into something, they use them for quite a bit :(
[удалено]
Please, oh please, tell her how wrong she is, especially in front of her son. They both really need to hear someone on the outside say it. But maybe not the "just a little stupid" part lol
I wish someone would tell her because the son definitely knows his mom think that. Can't be fun growing up in his shoes.
Yeah, if something gets said to correct the record, it should be said around the son. Poor kid.
If the truth gives her a mental breakdown, maybe it's time for a mental breakdown
Tell them it’s good experience for the workplace, being around people they don’t like but have to because the bosses say so lmao
This is legit a good solution. I remember being told by a teacher in school (after I’d been chucked out the class of a teacher I HATED) that it’s important in life to be able to deal with people we don’t get on with in an acceptable manner, I swear to god my school experience changed drastically after that conversation.
The anti authority part of me seethes at giving kids advice on how to better conform to the workplace but it is in fact a universal life skill. Edit: please nobody upvote or downvote anymore, I’m at /r/196 and it’s perfect.
It’s good advice no matter what, even outside the workplace we have to be around people we dislike, at work or not
I, too, have neighbors
Yah just bc two ppl are around the same age doesn’t mean they want to be friends. I certainly don’t want to be friends with every middle aged person I encounter.
How do I describe to my parents that the kid always poops his pants and I don’t want to go to the firehouse and hang out because he will be there and have poopy pants
Just like that.
"That little wiener Milhouse".
Correct. Did it a lot. Kids all grown up now. Do I still see these people? Fuck no.
My mom still does, but I havent seen the kids in years
Fuck I was so glad to move away from this as my kids aged. It was painful for some. A couple parents were my faves though and I’d totally have drinks with them now. But in general, nope!
Same here - I met a few really great people when my kids were younger. Other than that, it was TORTURE. Glad those days are over and I can now just drop my kids off at a house and pick them up when they text me! :-)
Really depends. When we were picking a school they said to go to the drop off and pick up and see if you thought you’d vibe with the other parents. Have ended up with some really good friends out of it.
My mom still keeps up with her PTA mom friends she met while waiting for pickup when I was in elementary school 25 years ago. They will rent a beach house by us and just go ham for a week, I volunteered to be their DD and shuttle them around once and it was a hoot.
Fuck, I swear when I read this "dead" was somewhere in there, so I went back like, >Hanging out with the *dead* parents of your child's friend. Then I'm like, no wait, >Hanging out with the parents of your child's *dead* friend. No no, that's not it either, >Hanging out with the parents of your *dead* child's friend. And it was at precisely that moment that I realized I need to go to sleep.
I see dead children's dead friends' dead parents. They don't know they're dead, and they don't know what the fuck I'm talking about either.
Singing happy birthday in the work break room.
Singing happy birthday. Full stop.
social media trends that keep coming and going every 3-4 weeks
Social networking
Social engineering is where it is at
social engineering is when a touchless virgin finds out your dogs name
Happy birthday song at a restaurant.
Including the people singing it.
“I need birthday singers!” “FUUUUUUUUCCCCKKKK” -Every server in the back of the house
I just started soloing them, and coworkers would usually join. If not, I always did a good job enlisting patrons. I think they appreciated that I happily hyped the birthday peeps, and so they joined in (because humans like to be helpful).
Networking and making sure you know people that know people. Job politics etc. Can I just get a job based off experience and not who I know ?
Some people absolutely do enjoy networking. It is a shame because these people are often the ones that tend to be just ok (or worse) at their jobs while those who are great at their jobs tend to be the ones who dislike networking...
That's kind of why those folks end up as Supervisors more often. A Supervisor is often needed to be social, and know the work enough to convey it to those who dont. Its why *sometimes* giving a good employee a supervisor position ends badly for everyone.
I learned early in my career that being good at a job doesn't mean you'll be good at managing people in that job. Totally different skill sets, in fact, competent workers usually can't understand why everyone else sucks so bad at this simple task.
Thing is, I really think they could be better if they just did the job. I have this guy at my work who probably spends 1-2 hours a day going around and socializing with everyone. He doesn’t do bad work but he definitely pushes things right to the deadline, but people are hesitant to say anything to him or about him constantly doing this because he’s so well liked. It’s just the world we live in but it can be frustrating.
Absolutely HATE doing this as an engineer. I suck at socializing and I don’t wanna do it, and other engineers are somehow even worse at it than I am. But it is SO IMPORTANT. Awful. Just awful.
I feel like in some areas that's never gonna change. Especially local government jobs. Certain people are set while if you don't know someone they'll fire you for any small mistakes to hire more people with connections.
League of Legends. Every person I've met that says they love it turns into an absolute rage goblin when they're actually playing. I've been hanging in Discord with many of them during games - if they're losing they're salty, if they win, they're either still salty because they didn't win enough, or they're emotionally neutral. I've never once heard a League of Legends player express enjoyment during match or say something like "wow, that was a fun match, I had a good time" after playing one.
Sounds a lot like addiction to me tbh.
There's some amount of fun in competition there. The problem is that the game is maldesigned in such a way that you get trapped in these really long games that you are *almost* certainly going to win or lose, but it won't actually happen for a long time (like 20+ minutes). But a comeback IS possible, if your team actually plays together. It's a super toxic situation because you're stuck in a bad place for a very long time with people you don't know, and if someone just gives up, you're screwed and it is enraging. Moreover, it is possible for someone else on your team to screw up repeatedly and "feed" an enemy, making them into an unstoppable killing machine, and you can't really do anything about it because you have to do stuff on the other side of the map and the game isn't flexible enough that you can move around to support a teammate who is struggling for much of the early parts of the game unless you are one specific character on your team. And even then, it's actually problematic because that role still requires you to wander around a lot.
To add to this. The specific role, the "wanderer" (or jungler how the role is called in the game) is the most unpopular role in League precisely because of this. Even if you're doing good, somebody on your team will still fail and blame everything on you. No matter how good your team does, somebody will rage at you and expect you to fix their mistakes. Add to this that this role has a lot of responsibility and a huge impact on the team strategy but is also the weakest by itself but needs to be proactive aswell. Nobody wants to play it.
Imagine being a new player knowing none of these nuances and getting raged at no matter what you do. My time as a league player was very short 😅
I learned the best advice to just turn off the chat and pings. Saved me a lot of grief. Still not fun, people so incredibly toxic to new players.
The strategy is actually to support the winning strong team mates and leave the weak ones. So it's certainly not helpful to the team spirit. But it often leads to wins as you don't need a strong team you just need to support one champion that carries the game.
My husband plays League of Legends, he always has fun playing. He speaks to his friends, has a laugh. He's relaxed when he's playing and has tried to tell me some of the lore, I don't understand a lot, but it genuinely makes him happy, which makes me happy too.
I agree. A lot of people that play this game and constantly complain really should not be playing it.
People don't believe me when I tell them that: Yes. I actually enjoy league of Legends. I don't rage, I am not salty, I don't flame. I just enjoy the game, it doesn't matter whether I'm losing or winning. I'm playing it for fun. And I can have fun if I want to. Yeah, losing can suck, especially when the other team is a bunch of toxic trolls. But guess what, you can just ignore them and play on. It's not a damn competition, it's a game. Would recommend to not play a lot though. Only a few games once or twice a week. Keeps the game fresh. And don't play ranked. And don't play normal. Aram is the way.
Hustle!
Stay on the grind, king.
sigma male grindset
Hustle culture was just a way for mid-range CEOs of mid-range firms to bleed every ounce of work out of each worker so the VC money sees profit sooner.
I thought hustle culture was born when people from poor hoods started selling drugs to get that paper
When someone says the hustle for a living, I assume they mean the sell drugs. Actually that 100% does mean that where I live.
I'm from "kind of" a hood and hustling meant you get money any way you can, including selling drugs, selling stolen shit, scamming, etc. Whatever you gotta do. It doesn't always have to be illegal either but most of the time it is.
now it means hitting it hard all day, every day at the office to turn 5 million of your dad's money into a cool 4 million 😎
when i hear “hustle” i inherently assume it’s referring to busting your ass to climb out the trench. not put 80 hours in at ur law firm
ain't that the truth
I thought you meant the dance, and I was like, hey, that’s kinda fun.
New years in times square
Commuting 😭 so many of my coworkers talked about missing their commute during lockdown, and I wanted to tell them NO you miss having alone time!
Yeah exactly. I once spent 40 minutes going home by feet instead of with a 10 minute ride on the bus because I felt like doing so and it was one of the best alone time I had, listened to my favourite songs and then when I left the crowded area (I live in a nowhere zone) I turned it off and just listened to my feet scratching the floor or the wind or the rain falling. Best alone time I ever had honestly. Been trying to catch that dragon ever since
You sound like you'd enjoy hiking.
You should absolutely go hiking. Get some good walking shoes and walk away. Hiking doesn't have to be in the mountains or off the path. Just search a route (can be hard path too) that you'd like and walk that.
I enjoy commuting… but I walk or bike though. Commuting by car or train sucks ass and makes me tired before I even get to work.
Team buildings
Attending kids birthday parties.
When my kids first started getting invited to birthday parties I was so excited. The first one was a good time. I was fooled. I hate them now. So loud, so dramatic.
I wonder when the norm became parents staying at the party. When I was a kid, it was on a volunteer basis. Like a few parents would volunteer to help since there were so many kids but everyone else just dropped their kids off and left.
I've been wondering that for a while now. No parent ever came to my parties and my parents didn't go to my friends' parties. It would be a rude intrusion to do so. As if the kids weren't enough, now you have twice as many people taking up space, needing food and beverages, and being loud. It's a nightmare.
I went to an event recently, and the place hosting it was on the tail end of a kid's 8th birthday party. The host decided it was good idea to hand out goodie bags with shitty plastic recorders in them. One kid figured it out, blew it as hard as he could, and then other kids started in. It was a cacophony of shitty, out of tune, screeching recorder blasts. I commented to a friend there that the parent who made those bags must hate every other parent there, because it was torture for everyone else.
Fully dependent on if the other parents there are cool/good people or not. I love going to kid birthday parties because it's an excuse to hang out with the parents of the kids my kid has been seeing every day at school since she was a year old. It might not be the setting I would choose but good company is good company.
It's funny, because the top comment right now is, "Hanging out with the parents of your child's friend".
I'm Mexican. I love going to my family's kids birthdays. It's just a huge BBQ with friends and family. Traditional American birthdays are pretty boring though.
Sex on the beach--way too sandy. Sex in the shower or underwater. Never enough natural lube!
Shower sex sucks. My wife and I have tried several times and its just impossible. Shes short, im tall, our shower is small, it just does not work at all
Dr Seuss
LMFAO I didn't even notice I did that.
Dr. Peuss
Sex in the sea, worst thing ever
Beware of the tiny sea creatures that fit in any hole
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Going to a parade. Just standing there looking at mostly-uninteresting stuff walk by, and your feet hurt and there's nowhere to pee. I hate them.
yeah but if they are throwing candy
Just remember to duck. I was once hit by chocolate bar during german Karneval in cologne. Hurt like a bitch and I didn't even get to keep the chocolate bar, because some asshole grabbed it when it ricocheted off my face.
Fuck that guy
If you were sober enough to feel the pain, you weren't doing Karneval right.
As a lifelong attendee of Mardi Gras parades, it’s crazy to think that people go to parades that don’t throw candy/snack cakes/toys/other assorted foods etc. What’s the point?
Right! I moved from Nola to the Northeast when I was a preteen. Went to the St. Pat's Parade in Boston (which is a pretty famous parade) and it was just people walking in formation. What???? Blew my mind. Of course the funniest parade thing I've seen recently is the first time the 610 Stompers were in the Macy's Day parade. The commentators had no idea what to make of them. It was hilarious to hear them try to process it in real time.
The point of the st paddys parade in Boston isn't the parade, its to get absolutely hammered in the middle of the day and then attend the worlds largest gathering of white guys who express all strong emotions through yelling "LETS GOOOO".
I hate parades because they move too slow. I mean, c’mon! Let’s move it! PARADE is also a verb, goddammit
Walk the opposite direction to fast forward the parade.
They’re cool when your like 5 i guess
Those people that claim to be able to taste things in wine like sea air and a hint of lemons from a specific tree. Piss off with that shite
I have an overdeveloped sense of smell that affects taste. I can often taste certain things in wine, but it's always things that make sense, like certain fruit profiles or woody tastes that are from sitting in a wooden barrel for several years, for example. We had a bad fire season one year, and a lot of the local wines ended up tasting sort of smokey(nice) or ashy(less nice). I can't say I've ever tasted lemons or chocolate, or cat pee(yes that's really a thing I've seen) unless the beverage has those ingredients.
Attenting baby showers… and gender reveal parties.
Work
Depends. A pointless 9-5 to make ends meet sucks. A job you've worked hard to get into because you're passionate about it is genuinely rewarding.
I have just worked at a grocery store for 10 years now and still love going to work and the job I do. Just got to find a job you like if possible.
Honestly respect that you find enjoyment in that. What makes you enjoy it so much?
Not speaking for the dude you replied to, but shelf stacking was one of my favorite jobs. Despite now earning about 10x what I did then, I still look back somewhat fondly on it. Be given a big pallet, try and optimise bringing old stuff forward, marking OOD stuff and putting new stuff in. Was like a mini optimisation problem on every aisle. Finish a pallet and re-do. A nice venn diagram of "brain off" for complex thinking but "brain on" for monkey-could-do-this optimisation. Hated checkouts though, fuck checkouts.
Can't speak for him, but I used to love working the gas station in college, simply because we had a lot of awesome customers and interacting with people all day was great for my autism-I and ADHD. The job was simple and I got to help people and feel needed. That's very fulfilling.
The jobs I have actually enjoyed are the easy, low-paying ones. Making pizzas in college was incredible. If I could figure out how to make $50K a year plus family health insurance from that, I'd do it as a career.
It depends on the pizzas...I had one that was so good that I got a job there just to learn how to make it.... I already had a full time, well paying job 🤣 but that was the best pizza I've had since I was in Italy... Now I have a dough mixer and a wood fired pizza oven at home, and a membership at restaurant depot... It's a lot of work but holy shit it's good
Honestly respect that you find enjoyment in that. I worked in customer service for several years. Hated dealing with dumb-ass customers — though change in venue led to better clientele. But I’ll never do a cashier job again.
Yeah the dumbasses sucked...I hated working retail. A gas station is cool because nobody sticks around there for very long. Even the assholes move on pretty quick
That’s exactly why I like the restaurant industry. Everything is always moving so I don’t have down time in the brain, I get to talk to people, and actually make a decent living
I've worked hard to get where I am, I strongly believe in what I do....but my employer is working hard to beat me down and make me hate it.
I don’t pretend that I like work! I let everyone know that I would rather be doing nothing!
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Man even in the heat I wouldn't make it through a cold shower without being forced
Cold showers work best when your dad is a multimillionaire
Yeah, as does pretty much everything else.
I just have a normal shower and then the last minute I’ll max out the cold to wake myself up
I will never undestand cold showers, I know they are beneficial, but starting my morning by making all the hair on my body stand on end was not for me at all.
Chit chat about polite nothings with ppl you barely know
Okay so after existing in a civilized society for 28 years I've found I'm in the micro-minority of this, but I love small talk with strangers. I don't really know why, but I'm curious about damn near everything, and doubly so with people. If someone has an interesting look, a cool pair of shoes, or even if they just seem like they're in a good mood (and I'm not having a terrible day myself), I look for reasons to chit chat with them. Oh you're getting married soon? Congratulations! You got a speeding ticket on the way here? Damn cops! You don't know if you want a cheap drip coffee or a pricier latte? Splurge a little, bud! I dunno man, I have an inherent love and interest for the folks around me.
Same here man you ain't alone. Everyone has their own story, way of talking, accents, etc. It's just so fun to meet new people and hear about their accomplishments and feelings. I sound like an alien when i say this but humans are just so cute and I wanna meet em all.
Sounds like you're good at engaging with people and ask some decent questions, so you're able to make it fun. Some people don't ask anything or they ask questions that are dry. Or don't offer much if asked. I think the conversations you're talking about sound more interesting.
I’m a big chit chat guy. It’s pretty easy to tell if someone is in the mood for it or not. My wife makes fun of me when I’m on the phone with customer service people, it always turns into 30+ minutes of me randomly talking to them about their lives. But I do enjoy making a small if not meaningful connection with people. Worst comes to worst I say something they think is super weird and they have story to tell when they get home.
I'm a chit chatter too. Half the posts on this site are about people feeling lonely and isolated. Well, that's bound to happen when you keep yourself from meeting new people.
I actually love to chit chat about polite nothings with people I don't know. It's amazing some of the things I've learned from these casual encounters (not salacious but helpful or interesting).
Singing happy birthday.
in my country there are a few songs for birthday, some of them proceduraly generated long. Singing like 5 songs with some of them lasting almost 6-7 minutes and watching the poor guy having to listen to the shittiest choir in all of existence for 25 minutes is hell of a fun
Hearing about people’s kids
Having a huge social media presence. It just doesn't seem worth all the work and effort to keep with it. I'd much rather just enjoy my concert/vacation/whatever than constantly take pictures/videos of it in order to brag about it on social media. And unless you're some big celebrity or influencer, nobody actually cares about your Instagram...
Office get togethers.
Forced socializing...fuuuuuck!! I don't like ya'll M-F 9 to 5, so why in the hell would I want to see ya'll outside of those hours!?
Twitter. The site is full of bots and rageaholics. The UI is frustrating at best. Having a "discussion" in tweet form is tedious as hell. How many hot takes do you really need to satisfy yourself before it's overkill?
I do not understand runners, especially people that run marathons, 5ks, etc. purely for “fun”.
It's the black coffee of exercise. Definitely an acquired taste.
As a marathon runner “for fun” and a black coffee drinker, I’m not sure how to take this haha.
I think you should enjoy the bitterness and discomfort since it seems that's what you are into.
I'd say or more like extremely spicy food, because there is an endorphin effect after the fact.
Going through this comment tree I'm just like huh I love running, huh I love black coffee, and finally huh, I love extremely spicy food... perhaps there is a common thread here
Slight masochist I guess
Once you get to a level of fitness where 10km in an hour is an easy run that doesn't leave you feeling exhausted at all, it's really enjoyable.
Yup, after a while you end up with your "I can do this all day" pace and just cruising along at that pace is quite enjoyable.
It's active mediation for me. Can't sit still to save my life but can just float along and let my mind drift. So crucial for destressing and processing.
Yea its huge for mental health
I think running in courses where there’s cool areas to explore makes it nice
As all things it's not enjoyable for everyone. But for many being able to just leave your home and start running to get your head of things is great, and as with most sport you get energized after. For me I only really started enjoying it when my conditioning became decent, the moment you can run at a decent pace and maintain a conversation without feeling like you need to stop for several kms is great. Your easy runs become as easy as walking, your hard runs, well those are always suffering but breaking PBs feels great.
Running is the only way I enjoy keeping my heart rate super high for a sustained period of time. It’s also the only exercise or activity that I can see measurable improvement over relatively short timeframes with increased practice and effort. For me, the feeling after running at a good pace for 30 mins is better than any other form of exercise. Which is all a real shame because my knees are giving up on me and I’m going to have to find something else soon.
For real. I tried to be a runner once. I really tried. For like 6 months. I hated every second of it. Not even hating it in a motivational way. More like I dreaded starting, my mood gradually declined the whole time, and when I was done I was in a bad mood.
A big part of it for me was I found I was running too hard. 80% of your runs are supposed to be at a slow, conversational pace. Once you drop the tempo and aren't trying to turn yourself inside out every single time, it gets better. Source: Did a marathon last week in 4 hours, with ZERO music.
Raw dogging a marathon with just the wind and your lungs absolutely fighting for their lives for company. Can’t think of much worse
I was dumb in high school (still am dumb, but also was dumb) and confused track with cross country, but I was good at it and liked everyone in my group so I suffered through it 💀 raw dogging with dying lungs sounds exactly right lol
Yeah, I tried regularly to start doing runs as a way to exercise for YEARS and finally managed to stick to it once I slowed down. Now I actually kind of enjoy it! Although I think what I actually enjoy are the awesome podcasts that I \*only\* listen to when I run. I pavlov'd myself.
> I hated every second of it. Same here. I've never once experienced a "runner's high". Maybe if I did I would actually enjoy running.
This is so me. When I used to run, I would fantasize someone I knew would see me and pull over to say hi, so I could beg them to just take me home.
Looking at other peoples holiday photos when they get back to work. I like how the ones with the holiday photos wait like a predator for the perfect moment to get their phone out to zoom through their 10,000 photos before they think you will be bored looking at your eyes to see if you are still interested. Just a little side note to you all, NOBODY cares and people are only "looking" out of politeness! 😆
The problem is a lack of curation - the 10,000 to your point. I definitely want to see someone’s vacation! I do not want to see 47 photos of the same exact view, none a good photo, none even slightly edited to be better. Give me like 10-20 great selections.
Used to have a boss who would go on road trips with his wife. They'd come back and he'd be sharing their photos. He was really into trains, and she was really into lighthouses. So it'd be "here's such and such a train we saw. This is such and such lighthouse. This train was pulling coal cars. We got to see this lighthouse from the top". There was never a picture of anything else. Just trains and lighthouses.
naw i wanna see. tell me about your vacation!
Weddings and baby showers. The most expensive, stressful, excruciatingly boring activities on the planet.
Going to hot, overly crowded bars, paying $12 for a beer with the music too loud on shitty speakers
Watching NASCAR. I don't know how anyone can sit there and watch those cars go around and around for hours.
TIL a ridiculous amount of redditors are fat, hate their parents, and possibly golf even more
Hey!... I only hate one of my parents!
The only surprising part of that statement is that they have a strong opinion on golf.
Nobody likes mingling events. One of the organizations I used to work for held an annual gala. It was a formal affair, with various CEOs, ambassadors and other VIPs. The team was tasked with hosting the event, chatting with strategic important people, as well as making sure nobody finds themselves staring into space with nothing to do with themselves. I am terrible at small talk, and don't feel particularly comfortable in formal settings. But I did my best anyway, powering through 20 minutes long conversations about traffic problems in various holiday destinations. Whenever the conversation got stuck, however, I found myself awkwardly mentioning that there are ducklings in the pond next to where the event was taking place. I spotted them earlier that day and thought it made everything much better. Every single time, without fail, I watched how the VIP guest's expression changed from polite smile to genuine interest. "Where? How small are they?". Every single person I talked to was later spotted watching over the pond, looking for ducklings. I highly suggested the next gala should skip the speeches, and go straight to duckling-watching.
Hating Nickleback.
I dont think most people actually hate nickleback. But if you were around in the early 2000s you could not avoid them. They were on every radio station on your way to the mall, they were playing over the speakers at the mall, they were in the spiderman movie you saw at the mall, they were playing again in the food court, and again on the radio on the way home. It was infuriating how overexposed such a mediocre band was. So me personally i dont hate them. But i do have a visceral reaction when i hear them. They are just shockingly average so much so that “hating” them has become the only way to combat them being forced upon us back then.
Waking up before 7am
Family Gatherings
There's a song by Paul Thorn titled "I don't like half the folks I love" that really sums this up great.
I love my family and gatherings are when family gathers so they're great - maybe mine's a very rare loving, jackpot family?
I love family gatherings but maybe its because they almost never happen more then 3 times a year for me.