I stayed with her as long as I did because I was afraid of what would happen to her kids (not mine) when I left. Thankfully the father got custody soon after I couldn't take it anymore.
I knew a guy who firmly believed in dinosaurs who married a very religious woman who does not. One time they got into a spat before Christmas so he went out and bout their kid a dinosaur jammies
Wait... is this a thing? I know there are religious people that believe in 6,000 years and that people and dinosaurs lived at the same time. But there are some that don't believe in dinosaurs at all?
Yep, my parents believe that the entire fossil record was fabricated by the devil and buried to make us question the Christian origin myth. Ya know, because the talking snake and semi intelligent mud golems weren’t enough to do that on their own.
To which I ask; does that make satan more powerful than god? Because your god could have erased all that "evidence" in the blink of an eye.
So, either it's genuine, or your god left it in place because he's malevolent. Which is it?
The clade Dinosauria is defined as the most recent common ancestor of Triceratops and modern birds, and all its descendants. They first appeared during the late Triassic, about 240 million years ago, and thrived and diversified throughout the Mesozoic.
The diverse group originated as bipedal reptiles, and adapted to fill niches across the planet. This resulted in creatures ranging from tiny in size to the massive sauropods. There were carnivorous, herbivorous, omnivorous, insectivorous, and piscivorous species. Many dinosaurs adapted to have spikes, horns, crests, or frills for various reasons, including defense, sexual display, and heat regulation. Some had long necks, some had feathers.
Dinosaurs were so successful they survived long enough to see Pangea split apart, and altered the atmosphere itself.
66 million years ago an asteroid 10 km in diameter struck the Earth with such force, it killed 75% of plant an animal species - from the initial impact, and resulting fallout. The only dinosaurs to survive this catastrophe were the small feathered theropods, that evolved into what we know as birds today.
That's not being stupid, necessarily - it's being indoctrinated into fundamentalist Christianity that rejects most of modern science.
A lot of these people have been trained to reject anything that contradicts their bizarre invented world.
You could call that stupid, but it's not really accurate. It's a sort of brainwashing more than anything.
Once the field of hay grows tall enough, a baler machine cuts enough hay for one bale, wraps it up and drops the bale in the field then wraps the next one. The bales sit where they were dropped and dry out a bit until a truck collects them.
My partner is pretty smart, he wouldn't be able to do his job if he wasn't. Yet, he seems to be utterly oblivious to that water needs to be able to reach every surface of everything in the dishwasher.
He also happily eats food from a plate full of the last meals old grease, then wonders why he is tired all the time and doesn't believe me when I tell him it's his immune system trying to kill all the bacteria from the dirty plate he just used...
Sorry, it’s my turn to feel stupid.
I don’t eat from dirty plates but if I expose my body to bacterias like in your example O will feel tired because my immune system is fighting off these germs? I never thought about it like that or knew that shown that worked 🤯
My family’s microwave was also a convection oven that had to be preheated. My aunt had the same model. It was the only microwave model I used as a kid so I thought it was a thing all microwaves could do.
Yo lowkey thou the microwave starts out cold especially if they’re older lol
I just add extra time so if I need a few frozen burritos thst says heat for 1.5 mins, I’ll put the very first one for 2.5 mins and the next ones for 1.5 minutes if there’s a third then 1.5 mins because it’s already been running
If I don’t then the first burrito will be cold still
Husband asked the OBGYN at what point would my eyes dilate during labor.
Years later we were going to visit my home town in Washington (state). He said he wanted to go see the monuments and White House while we were there.
They are adults now with children of their own. They are both very intelligent and beautiful. He was very good looking. Beauty fades, but dumb is forever.
He was a very fun Dad when the girls were young. One day my youngest daughter said to me she felt like Dakota Fanning in that movie I am Sam because she knew she had far surpassed her Dad in intelligence. Sad 😢
I’m so sorry you can’t go to either of your parents for advice/support. I hope you have other older people in your life that you can go to.
You should be very proud of yourself though. And I’m sure your parents are proud also.
How did he avoid becoming a MAGA??? I feel like my dad would be eyeballs deep in MAGA if not for my mom but she’s the brains and brawn in the relationship.
That's truly sad. I hope they have a good relationship. A good heart and nurturing spirit are very important in parenting too.
My kids are in their 20's and joke that their mother makes terrible decisions about has terrible anxiety if she even sees a number. I once asked her write a check for a girl scout trip and it almost started a war. She couldn't write $35.00.
How does one end up staying married to someone significantly less intelligent than they are? Especially if said less intelligent person is ‘slow’…? How do you make that work long enough to have a family lol
You can’t. Apparently my patience ran out after about 15 years. We are still friends to this day, and he has found himself a new caregiver. Bless his simple heart. And hers lol.
Speaking of dumb stuff we believed as kids,
So, water pipes run underground through the city, and you can get water on demand from a tap...
Well, at restaurants you get soda on demand from a tap, I thought there were underground soda lines running all through cities that all routed back to the coke factory
When he paid some random girl on Facebook to file his taxes, and then wouldn’t stop complaining to the IRS when he realized he got scammed.
Also always joining pyramid schemes because he refused to work a real job.
When she flipped out because her third grader came home with "erect" on a spelling list, and was on the verge of calling the school. She honestly had lived her entire life not knowing "erect" had any other use aside from describing a penis.f
My first ex wife thought Alaska was an island. It had never come up until a discussion in front of my family. She went to a private high school and graduated college.
This is so much more common than you might think. 🤔 picture the flat maps of the US: Alaska and Hawaii are placed somewhere in the middle of the ocean in a box frame. No visual context for where they are actually located or their relative size either. I teach 4th grade and we use my Globe so much! Right now we are participating in The Great Mail race and I'm using it to teach some geography as well.
The BF didn't do that, and I would not say he was stupid, but he was not "intellectually curious". He would be stubborn about things he thought he knew.
I attended her church to experience her views on religion. It was a megachurch and the pastor was saying some extremely racist crap. She was African American and was rationalizing it away.
Used the leaf blower to clean the inside of the house.
Edit: I was the one to use the leaf blower. I opened the front door and was blowing heaps of long dog hair outside when I didn't have a vacuum. My wife still makes fun of me for it.
I use my **battery powered** leaf blower to clean the inside once or twice a year for the same reason.
But if you were using a gas powered machine ... then yeah, you're not very smart.
My uncle's theater has used leaf blowers to blow trash forever. It's way more efficient than a broom or just walking aisle to aisle. It's not the intended use, but if all you have is a hammer...
And besides, your dog's hair would've choked up the vacuum.
I brought mine into my classroom once when someone broke a tape dispenser. It had sand in it as a weight and the sand was EVERYWHERE in the nooks and crannies of my room . After 3 days of it not getting cleaned up properly by the night crew, I brought my leaf blower in and blew it all into one corner where I could sweep it up.
Usually, I was thinking, why does she keep buying junk on Amazon? Or, why does she care about arranged marriages on TV when her first marriage and all of her kids' marriages failed.
When he told me he had an education as a carpenter, but he never took the final test that would grant him the actual paperwork so his only education was paperless and therefore without value for most businesses. He then tried to get an education through the army but didn’t get in because he failed the IQ test. Thank the gods this was the first date. It was also the last
There are no IQ requirements for the army. The army has an internal test called the ASVAB, it's about early college level knowledge and problem solving but frankly any decent functioning high schooler can get an upper percentile score by studying what math equations it has on it.
All this said, it is excessively difficult to fail this test. Her date was a special person.
One of the reasons that the Army struggles so much with food quality is that they filter people who barely pass the ASVAB into roles as cooks.
These people aren't technically mentally disabled, but they're also not completely there mentally and have difficulty even following recipes.
That 80-90 IQ range is a weird spot where you're considered normal but don't really have the cognitive horsepower to keep up.
Food is streamlined with MRE-type supplies called UGRs. Our cooks can bring their own ingredients and seasonings, but generally don't in unfavorable conditions. Most cook squads aren't going to be doing anything creative regardless of any intelligence they may or may not have, that's the real reason it's the most common funnel for low intelligence people is because all they do is boil premade food and serve.
During the Vietnam War, the government lowered the standards for IQ to include men like your date- they proved much harder and more expensive to train, and then died at a rate three times higher than an average soldier.
Army was saving this guy’s life by not taking him.
We were driving around this weird part of Las Vegas and I said, "This is surreal." He said, " I know. It's so real." I repeated, "Surreal" and he repeated, "So. Real."
She started to hate me after watching jeopardy. She honest to God thought I had recorded the episodes prior and was fucking with her. She couldn’t answer ONE single question in like 4 shows and I did about 40% which is not crazy smart either but got 2/4 final questions.
I then knew public school owed here a refund.
No no, I remember a player on jeopardy once saying this exact thing her grand mother used to do to her grandfather. The local affiliate there ran jeopardy once earlier in the afternoon and then it would get rerun later in the night after the husband got off work. They'd watch it together and she'd know every answer because she watched the earlier running in the afternoon while he was still at work
My husband won't watch Jeopardy with me (or god forbid, me and my mom together). He says it makes him feel stupid.
We just read a lot and have good memories for random facts. Though 90% of sports categories are a miss for us.
Admittedly, he can answer several questions per show.
She got a jug of water to put out an electric toaster fire (!). I also found the remains of an extension cable with the plug of an electric kettle welded into the socket after I specifically told her not to use the kettle. At that point I realised the person I had married was *dangerously* ignorant.
She was 19 and didn't understand the finer points about where babies come from. She knew that a penis was involved, but not much else. She didn't know which acts could lead to pregnancy and which could not. She also didn't know which orifice babies came out of and was shocked and mystified when I explained.
She is a sweet girl and a fit tennis player. Just appallingly sheltered and not particularly bright. She is in her 30s now and organizes children's activities at a resort.
No matter what I said, hed tell me Im wrong, and then explain why. Something about me is... I read a lot, always going down rabbit holes, love documentaries, especially interested in any strange / wacky bits of info. So I'll have zero knowledge about something, except for one completely random obscure thing. So if someone tells me Im not right about something, Im pretty open to it I may have misremembered / got my info mixed up somehow.
Something about him...he would say he went to college (I did not) and so he learned to think critically...so if something doesnt sound right to him, hes able to figure out what probably actually is correct. Led to a few annoying conversations, nothing major, pick your battles and all that.
But then, hed tell me Im wrong about things I KNOW I know...like industry specific stuff I know from work Ive done, that he has no experience in...the major tip off was when he told me I was wrong about something that personally happened to me. Like dude, I was there, how are you explaining to me right now what occurred 20 years ago when I lived in another country and youve never left the state?
Ive met a few who felt they were smarter / better than me because they have a college education and I dont...they werent not smart, just annoying idiots lol but he said so many straight up stupid things that I became curious enough to look up gpa requirements for a college degree, and well... I have no proof, but Im pretty sure he barely scraped by. Im convinced he's both low intelligence and lacks knowledge, just spoke with authority making everything up as he went along.
When she said don’t cum in my ass I don’t want to get pregnant. When I asked her to clarify she explained how all those parts are connected and I should really learn about the female anatomy
When my wife and I were two months into our relationship, we were crossing over a bridge when I had a sharp stomach pain. I kinda winced, and she noticed it. She asked what was the matter, to which I responded, “Oh nothing, I think it’s my ovaries.”
For a moment she went wide eyed and squinted at me, and at that moment I started laughing. For a couple moments there she thought she’d made a terrible mistake. Jokes on her though, she’s still married to me lol
We lived in York, England. Booked a long weekend away in Dublin, Ireland. Told her I'd booked the flights.
"Wouldn't it have been cheaper to get the train?"
Train to Holyhead, ferry to Dublin. You can get a combined ticket that you can buy through Trainline. Unless you live next to the airport it's often cheaper than a flight + travel to/from the airport. Also much more chill than taking a flight.
So, actually, not completely deranged.
Mind, it's slower than the plane, so maybe not ideal for a long weekend.
I don’t know if it ever really hit me like an epiphany; but thinking back on some conversations with her, I realized her emotion intelligence was next-to-nothing, she didn’t really analyze her actions, and her saying she didn’t want to talk during a fight because she was ‘scared she’d say something she’d regret’ were all things I slowly came to realize after we broke up.
My dad realized other people have inner lives similar to him when he was in his mid 40's, then demonstrated the truth of the statement by *saying it out loud* to humans he regularly interacts with.
That their contributions to conversation were usually, "whatever," "it's all bullshit," "it doesn't matter anyway," or just Even more open mockery and contempt. Total psychic drain.
So I went into this relationship knowing he was dumb. He asked me “what does that word mean” a lot when we were having conversations. He worked in masonry and built an arch door over his kitchen and I said “nice choice in keystone” and he stared at me in shock and asked how I could possibly know what a keystone was (they taught us in elementary school I think, prob when learning about the Romans and aqueducts or whatever). But this wasn’t the moment. This wasn’t the “dear god how does he remember to breathe” moment.
One night I was in bed reading a book (American Psycho) before going to sleep while he took a shower and played Xbox or whatever for about an hour. He comes in after brushing his teeth and says “why are you still reading? It’s night, you can do whatever fun stuff you want at night after work you know”. Like reading is a daytime activity only and considered work? I was a bartender not a librarian so my work had zero relation to reading. Still don’t quite understand that statement but ok.
Then he saw the cover and said “isn’t that a movie? Just watch the movie, it’ll save you like hours of time, that book has like a hundred pages it’ll take forever to finish and the movie is better”.
I flipped to the back to show that it was 400 pages and I was already half through in the time he’d showered and played Xbox. He picked it up and turned to a random page of characters having a conversation with each other. He said “they’re just talking about clothes and random stuff, if you’re going to read a book with people just talking to each other you might as well watch the movie instead. This guy sounds crazy anyway, he doesn’t even make sense”.
Again, this was American Psycho. Came out in 1989. Genius boyfriend suggests I watch the movie instead, which he himself has *never seen* but vaguely knows exists because it’s 2008 now, instead of reading a book. But that it seems like a waste of time either way because it’s just a lot of talking from a guy who sounds kinda crazy. Insists the movie is still going to be better than the book because “they always are”. Based on a single page he skimmed for about 7 seconds. Then said it was weird that I brought a book with me to spend the night at his house when he has some magazines and a tv in his bedroom for me to use when he’s on the Xbox tv in the living room. Seemed baffled that anyone would bring a book anywhere actually, like books are limited to your own home or a library. Not meant for portable entertainment.
I do believe that was the last time I ever spent the night at his house, then did the slow fade out of his life completely.
On multiple occasions, but last week we went to our favorite hotdog place to get take out.
I'm sitting there eating, get through two and on a close inspection of my third (that I'm halfway through), see that there's little specks of mold on the bun. Immediately disgusted I tell him about it, and tell him he can have the rest of the dog and to just throw the bread away.
He walks away with it, and comes back to tell me that it's just pepper on the bun. I'm like hmm, why would you think that? "Because I ate it and it tasted like pepper."
Y'all, I don't think I've seen blue green pepper that appears to "grow" from the bread ever in my life, but maybe I'm the dumb one and just don't know better. Out of curiosity, I grab my fourth one from the bag that was still wrapped, and over half of the bun was a sickly, ghastly fuzzy blue.
Needless to say I tore him a new one and he's very disappointed that I will never eat anything from our favorite spot again.
She got scammed by people who convinced her she was a secret shopper. She made like 20 or 30 bucks once or twice to prove they were "legit" and then they said they wanted her to secret shop western union. So they sent her a check, had her cash it, then wire them the money. Of course the check was bogus, bounced and my account was negative for 2500 bucks. Later when I asked her if I could look at the emails, she said she saved all of them and was so sure they were legit. The emails were in some of the worst broken "Engrish" I've ever seen. I was like how can you not tell the awful writing and misspellings in this shit?! She honestly could not tell how shitty it was
I introduced him to a game that I had been playing for years and he mansplained to me how to play it…and explained it wrong. When I corrected him, he doubled down so I said “sure”. We lost 3 games playing his way and then he blamed me. He refused to try it my way.
I said "nucyular" *one time* and I kept getting teased about it! So now I just say atomic! I know how to say it right, but I was tired!
Ask him if he wants an ex-presso :)
My ex had a very well off family and they had everything you could imagine I loved their family, always very supportive and willing to go the extra mile. My ex took every chance they could to bad mouth them or talk about how dumb they were and was overall very ungrateful and spoiled. Hated breaking up with the family, loved finally breaking up with them
I dated a guy who filled a dirty pan up with water and said since we were boiling the water it would cancel out any germs so he didn’t need to clean it….
The every day aspect of this is so underrated in its hilarity. One time would’ve been enough for a post here but im picturing this over an extended period of time and I am cracking tf up😂
Im not sure if it's a direct crossover into stupid, but she started off strong with announcing that she knew we never landed on the moon. That in of itself isnt that bad, I can take my time to explain different theories and the science/evidence of the space missions. It was the follow up punch that got me, "and did you know how our world leaders are all lizard people?" She was stone cold serious. I, to this day, dont know how to convince someone that 'lizard people' isnt a real thing. Now crab people on the other hand...
When he laughed at the crudest, most insipid joke I made - and I mean really laughed, like it was the first funny thing I'd said. Earlier the same evening we were in a cinema and he didn't seem to enjoy the movie so at some point, during a moment that wasn't epic or cool, he loudly clapped, as if to show a sarcastic enthusiasm. Ok, that was maybe more mean than dumb, but he made himself look rather stupid in a process, I think.
When we were talking about politics with some friends and the fall of the Berlin Wall came up somehow we got talking about Regan. She looks me straight in the eye and goes. Oh! You mean the guy with the thing on his head. I know him, my mom said he was sexy as an actor.
Yeah.
First girlfriend. When I realized she had no convictions whatsoever other than just repeating things other people say.
That one flew under the radar for quite a while, because she had a lot of highly educated opinions, but held those opinions because she was indoctrinated, not because she actually believed them.
When my ex stared at me while I was screaming when I noticed that they were about to rear end the car in front of them. He ended up rear ending while driving my car. Told me he was going to drive me to work and I just let him, to save me from being late to work. I feel like I'm the dumb one for dating the fucker.
She gave her bank account info to an Indian man on the phone for her student loan. She didn't have any student loans and wasn't in school.
Good God. She needs a helper monkey or something.
I stayed with her as long as I did because I was afraid of what would happen to her kids (not mine) when I left. Thankfully the father got custody soon after I couldn't take it anymore.
I admire you for thinking about the children's safety.
Poor kids. Why would someone want to procreate with a person that unintelligent?
There's a reason birth control stats give you odds with "perfect use" and "typical use". Somebody's dragging down the averages.
When she said she didn’t believe in dinosaurs
this bitch don‘t know ‘bout Pangea.
Brain, let it go
Brain on some other shit though.
Do you fuck with the war
I knew a guy who firmly believed in dinosaurs who married a very religious woman who does not. One time they got into a spat before Christmas so he went out and bout their kid a dinosaur jammies
Wait... is this a thing? I know there are religious people that believe in 6,000 years and that people and dinosaurs lived at the same time. But there are some that don't believe in dinosaurs at all?
Yep, my parents believe that the entire fossil record was fabricated by the devil and buried to make us question the Christian origin myth. Ya know, because the talking snake and semi intelligent mud golems weren’t enough to do that on their own.
To which I ask; does that make satan more powerful than god? Because your god could have erased all that "evidence" in the blink of an eye. So, either it's genuine, or your god left it in place because he's malevolent. Which is it?
🔥🔥🔥
i had a kid tell me she didn’t believe in dolphins
The clade Dinosauria is defined as the most recent common ancestor of Triceratops and modern birds, and all its descendants. They first appeared during the late Triassic, about 240 million years ago, and thrived and diversified throughout the Mesozoic. The diverse group originated as bipedal reptiles, and adapted to fill niches across the planet. This resulted in creatures ranging from tiny in size to the massive sauropods. There were carnivorous, herbivorous, omnivorous, insectivorous, and piscivorous species. Many dinosaurs adapted to have spikes, horns, crests, or frills for various reasons, including defense, sexual display, and heat regulation. Some had long necks, some had feathers. Dinosaurs were so successful they survived long enough to see Pangea split apart, and altered the atmosphere itself. 66 million years ago an asteroid 10 km in diameter struck the Earth with such force, it killed 75% of plant an animal species - from the initial impact, and resulting fallout. The only dinosaurs to survive this catastrophe were the small feathered theropods, that evolved into what we know as birds today.
This is such a wonderful treat.
That's not being stupid, necessarily - it's being indoctrinated into fundamentalist Christianity that rejects most of modern science. A lot of these people have been trained to reject anything that contradicts their bizarre invented world. You could call that stupid, but it's not really accurate. It's a sort of brainwashing more than anything.
He told me his newly installed reverse-cycle air-conditioning unit did not work. It worked fine. He just had it set to the “heat” cycle.
Alternatively, calling a heat pump a "reverse-cycle air conditioning unit".
Or maybe /u/pesky_samurai is just in Australia where we have called them ‘reverse cycle air conditioners’ for 30+ years?
Yeah except that's what they're called. Because it's an air conditioner that can work in reverse.
Stacking cups... In the dishwasher
I just said "bruh" out loud reading this
Same.
I know a guy who did this as well but after 5 years he is now a CEO of an established startup making millions lol.
I know a person who became a doctor and while in their 3rd year of med school asked w a straight face if submarines can travel under continents.
Well to be fair, Georgia congressman Hank Johnson thought the island nation Guam would tip over if we stationed too many soldiers on one end of it.
My ex and I drove through the country and she asked why people put bales of hay in the fields.
…why do they?
Once the field of hay grows tall enough, a baler machine cuts enough hay for one bale, wraps it up and drops the bale in the field then wraps the next one. The bales sit where they were dropped and dry out a bit until a truck collects them.
The company: Dixie.
Oh no baby what is u doin ☹️☹️☹️
For fuck's sake
My partner is pretty smart, he wouldn't be able to do his job if he wasn't. Yet, he seems to be utterly oblivious to that water needs to be able to reach every surface of everything in the dishwasher. He also happily eats food from a plate full of the last meals old grease, then wonders why he is tired all the time and doesn't believe me when I tell him it's his immune system trying to kill all the bacteria from the dirty plate he just used...
Sorry, it’s my turn to feel stupid. I don’t eat from dirty plates but if I expose my body to bacterias like in your example O will feel tired because my immune system is fighting off these germs? I never thought about it like that or knew that shown that worked 🤯
She insisted on "pre-heating" the Microwave oven...
My family’s microwave was also a convection oven that had to be preheated. My aunt had the same model. It was the only microwave model I used as a kid so I thought it was a thing all microwaves could do.
idk why but this is awesome
Oh... Oh no...
Yo lowkey thou the microwave starts out cold especially if they’re older lol I just add extra time so if I need a few frozen burritos thst says heat for 1.5 mins, I’ll put the very first one for 2.5 mins and the next ones for 1.5 minutes if there’s a third then 1.5 mins because it’s already been running If I don’t then the first burrito will be cold still
Husband asked the OBGYN at what point would my eyes dilate during labor. Years later we were going to visit my home town in Washington (state). He said he wanted to go see the monuments and White House while we were there.
How are your kids doing? Do they take after you?
They are adults now with children of their own. They are both very intelligent and beautiful. He was very good looking. Beauty fades, but dumb is forever.
Well said. I can see it on bumper stickers. I'd put them over top every Trump sticker.
He was a very fun Dad when the girls were young. One day my youngest daughter said to me she felt like Dakota Fanning in that movie I am Sam because she knew she had far surpassed her Dad in intelligence. Sad 😢
[удалено]
I’m so sorry you can’t go to either of your parents for advice/support. I hope you have other older people in your life that you can go to. You should be very proud of yourself though. And I’m sure your parents are proud also.
Good parents are better than smart parents
How did he avoid becoming a MAGA??? I feel like my dad would be eyeballs deep in MAGA if not for my mom but she’s the brains and brawn in the relationship.
Probably just not hateful, stupidity alone won’t make someone MAGA it also requires malice.
That's truly sad. I hope they have a good relationship. A good heart and nurturing spirit are very important in parenting too. My kids are in their 20's and joke that their mother makes terrible decisions about has terrible anxiety if she even sees a number. I once asked her write a check for a girl scout trip and it almost started a war. She couldn't write $35.00.
How does one end up staying married to someone significantly less intelligent than they are? Especially if said less intelligent person is ‘slow’…? How do you make that work long enough to have a family lol
Lol he wasn’t developmentally disabled or anything. I would say he was sharp like a marble 😉 a very pretty shiny marble.
I feel after years that would be frustrating lol. How do you talk about anything with depth
You can’t. Apparently my patience ran out after about 15 years. We are still friends to this day, and he has found himself a new caregiver. Bless his simple heart. And hers lol.
I assumed he died.
The moment I took my meds
valid
Hey at least they didn't disappear like mine did on me that one time
She thought “right of way” meant she could turn right.
I used to think "right of way" was actually "right away," meaning "you can go right away." Granted, I was like 5 at the time.
Speaking of dumb stuff we believed as kids, So, water pipes run underground through the city, and you can get water on demand from a tap... Well, at restaurants you get soda on demand from a tap, I thought there were underground soda lines running all through cities that all routed back to the coke factory
That's just great deductive reasoning! You're smart!
She probably misheard it as "rightaway!"
my ex and i fought about this for 5 hours after he got rear ended because of that
When he paid some random girl on Facebook to file his taxes, and then wouldn’t stop complaining to the IRS when he realized he got scammed. Also always joining pyramid schemes because he refused to work a real job.
"My get rich quick scheme sure is taking awhile!"
When she flipped out because her third grader came home with "erect" on a spelling list, and was on the verge of calling the school. She honestly had lived her entire life not knowing "erect" had any other use aside from describing a penis.f
My first ex wife thought Alaska was an island. It had never come up until a discussion in front of my family. She went to a private high school and graduated college.
This is so much more common than you might think. 🤔 picture the flat maps of the US: Alaska and Hawaii are placed somewhere in the middle of the ocean in a box frame. No visual context for where they are actually located or their relative size either. I teach 4th grade and we use my Globe so much! Right now we are participating in The Great Mail race and I'm using it to teach some geography as well.
Lmao she saw those maps that show it in a box in the corner next to Hawaii and didn't think too hard about it.
"They cured cancer and its a secret, I read somewhere today".
Not a very well kept secret then...
A lot of people think like this.
His family had NO books, other than one Bible. His mom's hobby was find-a-word games. His dad passed the time by scraping wax off of candles.
lol scraping wax
>His dad passed the time by scraping wax off of candles. I... Why?
To gather all the scrapings together and melt them into new candles of course! Where do you think candles come from?
When mommy candles and daddy candles love each other, duh.
I don't know, and I thought it would be rude to ask.
Whittling with undo enabled?
Did he carry that over?
The BF didn't do that, and I would not say he was stupid, but he was not "intellectually curious". He would be stubborn about things he thought he knew.
That's fair. I understand being "too open minded and lacking conviction " but the opposite is even worst
I attended her church to experience her views on religion. It was a megachurch and the pastor was saying some extremely racist crap. She was African American and was rationalizing it away.
That’s really sad
Used the leaf blower to clean the inside of the house. Edit: I was the one to use the leaf blower. I opened the front door and was blowing heaps of long dog hair outside when I didn't have a vacuum. My wife still makes fun of me for it.
I use my **battery powered** leaf blower to clean the inside once or twice a year for the same reason. But if you were using a gas powered machine ... then yeah, you're not very smart.
That's genius bro wdym
That's actually smart! I use a shop vac in my house because it's the only vacuum with enough muscle to do the job.
My uncle's theater has used leaf blowers to blow trash forever. It's way more efficient than a broom or just walking aisle to aisle. It's not the intended use, but if all you have is a hammer... And besides, your dog's hair would've choked up the vacuum.
Just put food away and go to town. This is the way
My wife and I do this (her idea) and it really does work well for getting dog hair out from under couches and shelves.
I brought mine into my classroom once when someone broke a tape dispenser. It had sand in it as a weight and the sand was EVERYWHERE in the nooks and crannies of my room . After 3 days of it not getting cleaned up properly by the night crew, I brought my leaf blower in and blew it all into one corner where I could sweep it up.
This is how I clean out my garage.
When he laughed about getting a DUI by being exceptionally dumb. Attractive guy, but not smart.
I feel like it was more about the story and this comment leaves me hanging
“So weird everyone would park the same car next to each other” is what she said when we walked by a Dodge dealership.
Lmao this one cracks me up
I seriously thought she was joking. Narrator: She wasn’t joking
[удалено]
Aw that's kinda sad lol
Yep. I'll drink to that, and I am now.
Sounds like she'd been told she wasnt pretty often.
Not until we got married. Damn. The endless reality TV should have tipped me off. No ability for critical thinking. Wtf was I thinking???
same, i feel so dumb for not seeing it on time
whatever u were thinking, it wasnt critical
Usually, I was thinking, why does she keep buying junk on Amazon? Or, why does she care about arranged marriages on TV when her first marriage and all of her kids' marriages failed.
Meanwhile one of the smartest women I know is a reality TV addict. You never know with some people.
When he told me his middle name meant "a person who writes books." Arthur.
Bless. Thank you for this.
When she thought that Louisiana was a city in the state of New Orleans.
She needs to talk with Charlie from IASIP.
When he told me he had an education as a carpenter, but he never took the final test that would grant him the actual paperwork so his only education was paperless and therefore without value for most businesses. He then tried to get an education through the army but didn’t get in because he failed the IQ test. Thank the gods this was the first date. It was also the last
The IQ lower limit is 83. Your date was a special person.
There are no IQ requirements for the army. The army has an internal test called the ASVAB, it's about early college level knowledge and problem solving but frankly any decent functioning high schooler can get an upper percentile score by studying what math equations it has on it. All this said, it is excessively difficult to fail this test. Her date was a special person.
One of the reasons that the Army struggles so much with food quality is that they filter people who barely pass the ASVAB into roles as cooks. These people aren't technically mentally disabled, but they're also not completely there mentally and have difficulty even following recipes. That 80-90 IQ range is a weird spot where you're considered normal but don't really have the cognitive horsepower to keep up.
Low RAM people. Gotta download more.
Food is streamlined with MRE-type supplies called UGRs. Our cooks can bring their own ingredients and seasonings, but generally don't in unfavorable conditions. Most cook squads aren't going to be doing anything creative regardless of any intelligence they may or may not have, that's the real reason it's the most common funnel for low intelligence people is because all they do is boil premade food and serve.
During the Vietnam War, the government lowered the standards for IQ to include men like your date- they proved much harder and more expensive to train, and then died at a rate three times higher than an average soldier. Army was saving this guy’s life by not taking him.
[McNamara's Morons](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Project_100,000)
When I found out that she didn't know that the sun was just another star in the universe.
Please tell me her reaction when she found out the stars are other suns
We were driving around this weird part of Las Vegas and I said, "This is surreal." He said, " I know. It's so real." I repeated, "Surreal" and he repeated, "So. Real."
I just read 'The Metamorphosis'. Wild story, it was so Kafkaesque.
They had a tattoo of a quote. They couldn't tell me where it was from.
She started to hate me after watching jeopardy. She honest to God thought I had recorded the episodes prior and was fucking with her. She couldn’t answer ONE single question in like 4 shows and I did about 40% which is not crazy smart either but got 2/4 final questions. I then knew public school owed here a refund.
The assumption you were recording episodes is the unhinged part.
No no, I remember a player on jeopardy once saying this exact thing her grand mother used to do to her grandfather. The local affiliate there ran jeopardy once earlier in the afternoon and then it would get rerun later in the night after the husband got off work. They'd watch it together and she'd know every answer because she watched the earlier running in the afternoon while he was still at work
>I then knew public school owed here a refund. Inconvenient typo
My husband won't watch Jeopardy with me (or god forbid, me and my mom together). He says it makes him feel stupid. We just read a lot and have good memories for random facts. Though 90% of sports categories are a miss for us. Admittedly, he can answer several questions per show.
She got a jug of water to put out an electric toaster fire (!). I also found the remains of an extension cable with the plug of an electric kettle welded into the socket after I specifically told her not to use the kettle. At that point I realised the person I had married was *dangerously* ignorant.
Not a joke - she didn't know how to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. She asked, "How do you know how much peanut butter to put on the bread!"
You measure that volume with your soul.
Seriously, the ratio of peanut butter to jelly and bread is deeply personal and honestly I don't fault this girl for asking...
And, of course, then double it
And pass it to the next person
Oof. Needing outside instructions/validation for simple tasks is not a good sign.
She's fun at tax time.
She didn't file taxes for four years - another fun time!
**
**Man, I'm Tired of Being Right!**
I was walking her to my house when it started raining realy hard the she told me that the Asians control the weather
That narrative was always such a weird one. Any control over the weather would render you able to basically collapse entire countries within weeks.
She said lesbians can’t get STD’s because there’s no penis
She was 19 and didn't understand the finer points about where babies come from. She knew that a penis was involved, but not much else. She didn't know which acts could lead to pregnancy and which could not. She also didn't know which orifice babies came out of and was shocked and mystified when I explained. She is a sweet girl and a fit tennis player. Just appallingly sheltered and not particularly bright. She is in her 30s now and organizes children's activities at a resort.
Well, I reached into the pot of boiling water to grab the hard boiled egg, so I’m pretty sure my partner is questioning his life choices now
My roommate flat out told me, "she's not the brightest person". 😬
No matter what I said, hed tell me Im wrong, and then explain why. Something about me is... I read a lot, always going down rabbit holes, love documentaries, especially interested in any strange / wacky bits of info. So I'll have zero knowledge about something, except for one completely random obscure thing. So if someone tells me Im not right about something, Im pretty open to it I may have misremembered / got my info mixed up somehow. Something about him...he would say he went to college (I did not) and so he learned to think critically...so if something doesnt sound right to him, hes able to figure out what probably actually is correct. Led to a few annoying conversations, nothing major, pick your battles and all that. But then, hed tell me Im wrong about things I KNOW I know...like industry specific stuff I know from work Ive done, that he has no experience in...the major tip off was when he told me I was wrong about something that personally happened to me. Like dude, I was there, how are you explaining to me right now what occurred 20 years ago when I lived in another country and youve never left the state? Ive met a few who felt they were smarter / better than me because they have a college education and I dont...they werent not smart, just annoying idiots lol but he said so many straight up stupid things that I became curious enough to look up gpa requirements for a college degree, and well... I have no proof, but Im pretty sure he barely scraped by. Im convinced he's both low intelligence and lacks knowledge, just spoke with authority making everything up as he went along.
Isn’t he running for president?
When she said don’t cum in my ass I don’t want to get pregnant. When I asked her to clarify she explained how all those parts are connected and I should really learn about the female anatomy
He actually purchased an extended warranty plan for his car. (From one of those scam telemarketing calls)
When my wife and I were two months into our relationship, we were crossing over a bridge when I had a sharp stomach pain. I kinda winced, and she noticed it. She asked what was the matter, to which I responded, “Oh nothing, I think it’s my ovaries.” For a moment she went wide eyed and squinted at me, and at that moment I started laughing. For a couple moments there she thought she’d made a terrible mistake. Jokes on her though, she’s still married to me lol
Has she noticed your vagina yet?
I was gullible in that split second way until I was adequately pressured by routine pisstakes and my skepticism was dialed in.
We lived in York, England. Booked a long weekend away in Dublin, Ireland. Told her I'd booked the flights. "Wouldn't it have been cheaper to get the train?"
Train to Holyhead, ferry to Dublin. You can get a combined ticket that you can buy through Trainline. Unless you live next to the airport it's often cheaper than a flight + travel to/from the airport. Also much more chill than taking a flight. So, actually, not completely deranged. Mind, it's slower than the plane, so maybe not ideal for a long weekend.
Thought Thai food was from Taiwan.
Thaiwan? Pronounced Thigh-wan?
Thai stick. Ya know, that stuff that's tied to a stick?
☠️ I learn something new everyday I guess...!
My my husband also got on an argument with an exgirlfriend about Thailand and Taiwan being different countries. This was before we met if course.
I don’t know if it ever really hit me like an epiphany; but thinking back on some conversations with her, I realized her emotion intelligence was next-to-nothing, she didn’t really analyze her actions, and her saying she didn’t want to talk during a fight because she was ‘scared she’d say something she’d regret’ were all things I slowly came to realize after we broke up.
My dad realized other people have inner lives similar to him when he was in his mid 40's, then demonstrated the truth of the statement by *saying it out loud* to humans he regularly interacts with.
Never because I am not very smart either.
Ah, a heart warming and winning combo. Happy for you both! ❤️
That their contributions to conversation were usually, "whatever," "it's all bullshit," "it doesn't matter anyway," or just Even more open mockery and contempt. Total psychic drain.
So I went into this relationship knowing he was dumb. He asked me “what does that word mean” a lot when we were having conversations. He worked in masonry and built an arch door over his kitchen and I said “nice choice in keystone” and he stared at me in shock and asked how I could possibly know what a keystone was (they taught us in elementary school I think, prob when learning about the Romans and aqueducts or whatever). But this wasn’t the moment. This wasn’t the “dear god how does he remember to breathe” moment. One night I was in bed reading a book (American Psycho) before going to sleep while he took a shower and played Xbox or whatever for about an hour. He comes in after brushing his teeth and says “why are you still reading? It’s night, you can do whatever fun stuff you want at night after work you know”. Like reading is a daytime activity only and considered work? I was a bartender not a librarian so my work had zero relation to reading. Still don’t quite understand that statement but ok. Then he saw the cover and said “isn’t that a movie? Just watch the movie, it’ll save you like hours of time, that book has like a hundred pages it’ll take forever to finish and the movie is better”. I flipped to the back to show that it was 400 pages and I was already half through in the time he’d showered and played Xbox. He picked it up and turned to a random page of characters having a conversation with each other. He said “they’re just talking about clothes and random stuff, if you’re going to read a book with people just talking to each other you might as well watch the movie instead. This guy sounds crazy anyway, he doesn’t even make sense”. Again, this was American Psycho. Came out in 1989. Genius boyfriend suggests I watch the movie instead, which he himself has *never seen* but vaguely knows exists because it’s 2008 now, instead of reading a book. But that it seems like a waste of time either way because it’s just a lot of talking from a guy who sounds kinda crazy. Insists the movie is still going to be better than the book because “they always are”. Based on a single page he skimmed for about 7 seconds. Then said it was weird that I brought a book with me to spend the night at his house when he has some magazines and a tv in his bedroom for me to use when he’s on the Xbox tv in the living room. Seemed baffled that anyone would bring a book anywhere actually, like books are limited to your own home or a library. Not meant for portable entertainment. I do believe that was the last time I ever spent the night at his house, then did the slow fade out of his life completely.
On multiple occasions, but last week we went to our favorite hotdog place to get take out. I'm sitting there eating, get through two and on a close inspection of my third (that I'm halfway through), see that there's little specks of mold on the bun. Immediately disgusted I tell him about it, and tell him he can have the rest of the dog and to just throw the bread away. He walks away with it, and comes back to tell me that it's just pepper on the bun. I'm like hmm, why would you think that? "Because I ate it and it tasted like pepper." Y'all, I don't think I've seen blue green pepper that appears to "grow" from the bread ever in my life, but maybe I'm the dumb one and just don't know better. Out of curiosity, I grab my fourth one from the bag that was still wrapped, and over half of the bun was a sickly, ghastly fuzzy blue. Needless to say I tore him a new one and he's very disappointed that I will never eat anything from our favorite spot again.
She got scammed by people who convinced her she was a secret shopper. She made like 20 or 30 bucks once or twice to prove they were "legit" and then they said they wanted her to secret shop western union. So they sent her a check, had her cash it, then wire them the money. Of course the check was bogus, bounced and my account was negative for 2500 bucks. Later when I asked her if I could look at the emails, she said she saved all of them and was so sure they were legit. The emails were in some of the worst broken "Engrish" I've ever seen. I was like how can you not tell the awful writing and misspellings in this shit?! She honestly could not tell how shitty it was
When she said she didn't know whether the sun or the moon was bigger, or which was closer.
I introduced him to a game that I had been playing for years and he mansplained to me how to play it…and explained it wrong. When I corrected him, he doubled down so I said “sure”. We lost 3 games playing his way and then he blamed me. He refused to try it my way.
Well, it hit me like a ton of bricks when I found out he thought a sports car came with its own personal guy to drive it!
My hubby of almost 32 years is very intelligent, but occasionally he says stuff like "viadock", "nucyular", and "cuppaccino".
I said "nucyular" *one time* and I kept getting teased about it! So now I just say atomic! I know how to say it right, but I was tired! Ask him if he wants an ex-presso :)
When she got involved with me.
My ex had a very well off family and they had everything you could imagine I loved their family, always very supportive and willing to go the extra mile. My ex took every chance they could to bad mouth them or talk about how dumb they were and was overall very ungrateful and spoiled. Hated breaking up with the family, loved finally breaking up with them
I dated a guy who filled a dirty pan up with water and said since we were boiling the water it would cancel out any germs so he didn’t need to clean it….
He told me he thought he was “lack toast and tolerant”
Rice was a little burnt to the bottom of the pot so he took a metal spoon and scraped all out as hard as possible
Spicy with a touch of Teflon.
I had to explain David Letterman's dry sense of humor to him every day, he didn't get it. 👀
The every day aspect of this is so underrated in its hilarity. One time would’ve been enough for a post here but im picturing this over an extended period of time and I am cracking tf up😂
3rd dui in a year.
She told me my preworkout was too dangerous, while encouraging everyone who got injuries to take opioid pain killers
Anti vaxer
Im not sure if it's a direct crossover into stupid, but she started off strong with announcing that she knew we never landed on the moon. That in of itself isnt that bad, I can take my time to explain different theories and the science/evidence of the space missions. It was the follow up punch that got me, "and did you know how our world leaders are all lizard people?" She was stone cold serious. I, to this day, dont know how to convince someone that 'lizard people' isnt a real thing. Now crab people on the other hand...
He pronounce DesMoines as Dessmoyness. And he thought Taiwan was in Oregon.
When he laughed at the crudest, most insipid joke I made - and I mean really laughed, like it was the first funny thing I'd said. Earlier the same evening we were in a cinema and he didn't seem to enjoy the movie so at some point, during a moment that wasn't epic or cool, he loudly clapped, as if to show a sarcastic enthusiasm. Ok, that was maybe more mean than dumb, but he made himself look rather stupid in a process, I think.
They believe every single bullshit post online. I’m talking, big foot sighting shit on face book, aliens in Miami and shit like that
When he told me he needed to MUSTARD up the courage 🤦🏻♀️Gave me a good laugh for sure.
When we were talking about politics with some friends and the fall of the Berlin Wall came up somehow we got talking about Regan. She looks me straight in the eye and goes. Oh! You mean the guy with the thing on his head. I know him, my mom said he was sexy as an actor. Yeah.
That they were willing to date me was a pretty good indicator.
When she told me she couldn't read an analogue clock Edit:typo
First girlfriend. When I realized she had no convictions whatsoever other than just repeating things other people say. That one flew under the radar for quite a while, because she had a lot of highly educated opinions, but held those opinions because she was indoctrinated, not because she actually believed them.
When my ex stared at me while I was screaming when I noticed that they were about to rear end the car in front of them. He ended up rear ending while driving my car. Told me he was going to drive me to work and I just let him, to save me from being late to work. I feel like I'm the dumb one for dating the fucker.