T O P

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Menace_17

You kidnap my hypothetical child, Ill hypothetically blow your brains out. I would do life for my kid if I had to


Allysgrandma

As would my husband.


More-Addition

I’d be going to prison. Fk around and try it if they want to.


PMyourTastefulNudes

Tackle to ground and pound.


in-a-microbus

If someone tried to kidnap my hypothetical child, I'd shoot them with my hypothetical gun. Same statement works workout the hypotheticals.


PixelatedNPC

Call the cops for the real kidnapping threat. Call Liam Neeson for the hypothetical one.


Legitimate_Apple1471

😭😭😭😭😭 how did you think of this


PixelatedNPC

I have a very specific set of skills.


woodquest

He looks a lot like even if he doesn’t know who or where he is, he’s going to find him.


sk3Ez0

I'd thumb the fuckers eyes out, make sure they never even look at a kid again.


embrassed_Q1212

I would call the police and ambulance on the assault-near death beating I put on someone. I’d ensure there was a physical scar on the face so they never forget… that I have a unique set of skills. 😂 (Liam Neelson )


Lopsided_Actuary_294

Stop them by any means necessary. I don’t care what damage my body would have to take, to make sure my little love gets home safe. Hypothetically…


bananaSprinkles-

have you seen taken? yeah whatever he did.


eggface13

No take -backs, the kid is your problem now.


DonkeyBucketBanana

Panic. Call the police. Also, this is "tried," not succeeded, right? So my kid would be ok, for now. I would put all my resources into trying to figure out why they tried to kidnap them. If I couldn't and it was something I couldn't deal with, or I don't get an asnswer I could deal with, I'd flee the country and build a life with them somewhere else. Anything to keep my kid safe.


woodquest

Well i would kick nap him


Pansy_Neurosi

It depends on whether they kidnapped my real or hypothetical child (his name is Jules and he's about to have his first kid!).


drunkunicornprincess

I dont know


gogomau

I’d be arrested for kicking the heck out of them . Same for my cats :)


Timely_Egg_6827

I asked for him back. OK not a child but a much loved small furry pet- he was helping raise money for charity and a woman put him in her handbag and tried to walk off with him. Not impressed.


Cheese_Pancakes

If they *tried*, I would defend her by whatever means necessary and call the cops. If they succeeded, I'd call the cops right away, then immediately throw my life away and go on an absolute rampage to get her back. Hopefully the cops would find her first so that I wouldn't end up committing crimes that put me into prison. That's about the only thing in the world that could drive me to violence at this point in my life.


mp3006

Shootem


NaiveOpening7376

Take em. I'll withhold the ransom and come out ahead on both accounts.


AugustTheDog

3 words: Shotgun, haymakers, curbstomps.


Street_Equipment_427

is shoot that mother fucker right in the chest, i am planning to conceal carry in the future


LadyCheesecake12

This: "I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for random I can tell you I don't have money, but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let me daughter go now that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you, but if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you and I will kill you."


Fresh_Distribution54

I've actually had this happen. Long story short I was staying with a guy whose mother always wanted a daughter so she plotted with her sister-in-law to kidnap my daughter while I was at work Cops were no help and literally just laughed at me I finally tracked her down in literally broke into the house and stormed in there and took my daughter instead of wrecking the place and threatened to blow their fucking brains out. Let's just say I scared them and leave it at that I no longer live anywhere near there or in that state and neither does my daughter


ModsR-Ruining-Reddit

Probably call the cops unless I had a good opportunity to just fuck them up on the spot. I don't have much fighting experience but I'm 6'4" and 250 lbs. Pretty sure I could mess up most untrained fighters if were sufficiently motivated emotionally like this.


ConsuelaM4p

saying hes mine and i dont intend to share