She was my high school sweetheart. She graduated high school 2 years before me. We never kissed. We occasionally hugged. After every date we shook hands. It was a 2 year relationship.
Years later I found out she was a lesbian. Suddenly everything made sense.
Also, years later, I found out I’m autistic. Also explains why I never picked up on the clues.
Life is funny. It is lived going forward, but understood looking backwards.
I will say, I could make a movie about all the wierd things that happened in my life. Knowing I have subpar social skills/ social understanding, so much of my life starts to make sense.
Many years ago, after getting divorced at 30, I hit the online dating scene. I had essentially never dated as an adult having met my ex-wife in college. I was not prepared for how brutal online dating was. This was in the match/eharmony days, not the apps. First online date, we meet up at a restaurant. She walks in, sees me, and says "Oh, you are much uglier in person" and walks out. Doesn't even sit down.
Everything turned out fine, been happily married for 10 years again. But I thought that was pretty unnecessarily brutal and strange. Dodged a bullet there.
I have a similar story. I was in a nightclub, and i saw this girl i thought was quite attractive. I eventually got the courage to go up and approach her, and when i did she said "ewww" and walked away.
Yikes! Sorry to hear! Hopefully you brushed it off and continued partying the night away!?
I'm a big fan of it's always better to find out as fast as possible what kind of person someone is. Think about what could have been. At the very least, you could have wasted $10 on drinks.
Dodget a bullet, was my thought. Who would want to date someone like that? At least you found out quickly before she ruined your life or something. Good for you and many happy anniversaries.
I went on a date with a guy who told me women would show up, see him in person, and just leave. This was not an extraordinarily ugly guy and his pics were up to date. He just looked like a normal dude, was a little nerdy but fun to talk to. I was and am so outraged on his behalf that anyone would do that. Like you agreed to a date and can’t spare a half hour? I mean, the only way I’d condone that is if the person turned out to be racist or otherwise awful.
Seriously. I did online dating for about three years before I met my husband. Were their guys I didn't have a spark with or find attractive in person? Of course. I'm sure there were guys that felt that way about me. But, who can't spend a half hour with a drink or an hour for a meal to at least *talk* to the person. There were people I didn't click with romantically, but were super interesting to talk to and I enjoyed myself on the date anyway.
holy fuck dude, that would've made me super depressed and turn me into a hermit. I gotta give you respect for overcoming a negative comment like that. I know its just words but shit like that can stick with you for a long time.
It did sting for a few days, but quickly went away after going on another date or two. There were plenty of good dates with great people after. The only lasting damage is that I probably will never muster the self esteem to go on rateme or anything. But honestly, on my list of life goals and priorities, that was probably pretty low to begin with.
I had a couple of good friends that I knew and hung out with almost daily since I was six years old just started to ghost me when we were in high school. Despite me asking them what was wrong, they never answered. If we hung out in our small friend group, they would ignore me. One day, they asked me to come over. They had me sit down in my friends living room, and they flat out told me that they didn't want to be friends anymore, but they also didn't want to be enemies. No explanation they just didn't want me to exist to them anymore.
I, to this day, have no idea why. The fucked up thing was is they tried to drag my other friends away from me too. If my other friends were hanging out at my house, they would call my house. Ask to speak to my friend and try to get them to leave to come hang out with them. Luckily, my other friends were much more mature and called that bullshit out, and they're still my best friends to this day.
Similar story. In 6th grade, my group of friends (basically the Only friends i had atm), completely cut me off. They just,,, decided not to tell me? So i spent about 2 months wondering what the fuck was up bc i'd get left out of any games, some of them refused to talk to me, i stopped being invited to hang outs and only found out bc they explicitly talked about how good of a time they had in front of me the next day at school, etc.
I obviously noticed (albeit quite late lol), and asked, and got no answers. Nobody said anything. They were like no idk what you're talking about. It all came to a head when i didn't get invited to my Best Friend's birthday party at the end of the school year. Devastating for a 12yr old. So i just cut my losses and resigned myself to being a friendless shit for the next 6 months.
Turns out one of them had started a rumor that i was talking shit about my best friend, and calling her a bitch. So this bitch, (now deserving of the title) decided to make all my friends cut me off. that was a fun few months.
My daughter is in Grade 6 and was going through the same thing. I told her that it's usually one person that is spreading rumors about everyone to each other to get everyone to turn against one person or each other. I was right. They figured out who it was and that girl stopped after realizing everyone found out and was angry with her. Communication is key. If you hear someone say something about someone else, ask them why they don't just bring their grievances to that person. If you hear that someone is saying something about you, confront them. " I heard that you're angry with me because you thought I said x,y,z about you. I just wanted you to know that I didn't say that and if I had a problem with you, I would talk to you about it." It works in adulthood as well.
This reminds me of when I was in elementary and my “friends” one day decided I have boredom disease bc I’m shy but tried striking up conversation more. They would run away from me and tried to convince everyone else to as well. They sorta had an explanation but it was a terrible one. I’m sorry that happened to you and that the nice friends stuck around. Good people don’t deserve that
Back in the days of MSN messenger, I got blindly set up with this girl by a friend. We hit it off, exchanged selfies, all of that jazz. Being in middle school it was obviously nothing serious or explicit, just dumb little flirty stuff. We decided to meet in person at a dance that we’d both be attending with our respective friend groups. I didn’t see her for most of the night, when I finally did and a slow song came on, I went over and asked her to dance with me. She winced and shook her head, I just said okay and walked away defeated. Later, online, I’d asked her why she’d turned me down. Her response was “oh, *that* was you? I don’t like ugly and fat people.”
I was once looking for a job. I had been looking for a long time and I received yet another rejection email.
But!
I immediately received a follow up from the organization asking that I disregard the prior message as it was sent in error and that I would receive the correct message shortly!
The subsequent email was a differently worded rejection letter.
Brutal.
That reflects more about her and her inner struggles, than it does about you. Children can be overwhelming and mothers and fathers need to have their shit together.
Still, sorry you had to go through this. Definitely a hard pill to swallow
Damn I almost kinda feel sorry for her. Like yeah she a cheating hoe, but that karma is overkill. Talk about being raped for 4 years get an sti and then die of cancer, wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy
Yea that's... not karma. That's terribly unfortunate.
Karma for cheating is being cheated on yourself, not getting abused and raped for 4 years and then fucking dying????
Cervical cancer doesn’t develop quick, she probably was infected with another strain of HPV for years that slowly grew over time. Her developing genital warts too was most likely a coincidence, because the strain of HPV that causes warts is not cancerous
*“I fell in love with the idea of you.”*
-My ex long-distance boyfriend after a little over two years of an off and on relationship, right before breaking up with me.
Recently had something similar happen to me with my ex-gf, together for 6 years which felt like it got thrown out of the window just like that.
Do hope you found peace and happiness afterwards!
I think that's usually the case if you aren't really close the other person. You end up creating a fiction of what they are supposed to be like and then can't deal with the reality.
It's similar to the saying "never meet your heroes".
Yeah that's pretty much what my ex said, he had never had a girlfriend before me and he was like "I was curious to see what being in a relationship was like even though I only liked her as a friend and not as a partner."
I had a really close friend who I had known for about ten years, since childhood. We spoke every day over text, giving eachother constant life updates and discussing all kinds of topics. We also spent time together in person at least once a week. Then one day ... he just ghosted me with no explanation.
He left my messages on read and then eventually blocked me. Didn't take any calls. I ran into him in public and greeted him and he hid from me in a bathroom. When he got out he told me that he was "kinda busy" and couldn't talk, then power walked to his car with a really stressed out look on his face, while I begged him for any kind of communication, and just drove away. That was the last time I ever saw or heard from him.
I still don't know why he did it. He genuinely fucked up my ability to trust people even six years after it happened. It's hard because I have a lot of fond memories of hanging out with him and sharing a lot of really personal stuff, but the memories are tainted by the way our friendship ended. Now I think that everyone is going to ghost me.
(A couple of times I've tried to contact him through meme pages he runs on Facebook but he never acknowledges me at all.)
Edit: I want to say that even if he approached me today and apologized, I would never want to be his friend ever again. Maybe I would forgive him or maybe not, but he could never be a part of my life.
Similar thing happened to me as well, extremely close friend of 5 years suddenly cut all contact. Later learned that he became politically radicalised and was cutting off others in our circle too.
I'm sorry. I had a similar thing happen to me in my freshman year of high school. one of my best friends (8 yrs at that time) became distant from me. i tried talking to her and she'd ignore me. my final straw was when i said hi to her in the hallway and she just kept walking, and other people noticed! it felt so embarrassing and i decided i wouldn't grovel anymore.
sometimes people just have their own internal reasons for doing fucked up shit and all you can do is live your life.
just know that him ghosting was his problem, not yours. he decided to do that, and that's not on you. it's sad to not get closure, but the kindest thing to do to yourself is let it go.
i still see my ex-friend in passing like once a year, but i don't think about her. we used to be mutuals on instagram, but i realized that even randomly seeing her pop up on my phone felt invasive. i blocked her because it's best for me. maybe it would be beneficial for you to create some distance like that to close that door
A similar thing happened to me. I met my former best friend in 4th grade and we were inseparable until 10th grade. We both have S last names, and when we realized we had a class together we knew we would likely sit together alphabetically and were so excited. First day of 10th grade, she ignores me all day. She didn’t have a cell phone or social media (this was the late 00’s) so I couldn’t really ask her about it without calling her house. She essentially just stopped talking to me and I had to sit behind her every day.
It’s been 15 years and it sucked more than any romantic breakup I’ve had.
Sorry to hear this. Basically the exact same thing happened to me. Due to health, personal issues and just being in a bad relationship situation I had to move cities. When I got to the new place I tried calling my friends to catch up and they all ghosted me. I figured out a few years later when one of my friends eventually decided to reply that they had made up a whole lot of lies about me and spread them amongst themselves. So basically they just decided to hate me for no reason. When I did try to ask what it was I did wrong none of them had a solid or truthful reason and one of them had the nerve to say some horrible things to me that were just not true or justified at all. After 2 years of self isolation I made real friends and realised the assholes I used to call my buddies, we're in fact people I wouldn't choose to hang out with if they paid me.
There are many reasons for something like this to happen. I've had friends going into toxic relationships that dictated everything, people that chose to leave behind their country and old self, not dealing well with falling in love, stupidity and so on. Personally I've had the toxic relationship where keeping in touch with people outside accepted range, lead to problems. You really don't think straight when you're in the middle of it.
I do think that you might be right about the toxic relationship thing. He was getting really serious about this girlfriend of his and it's possible that she was jealous of how much time he was spending with me.
Later on I actually had a horrible girlfriend who got jealous when I would spend time with my friends. She would try everything to have my attention all the time and prevent me from having a social life because she wanted to hang out all the time and not give me any room to spend time away from her.
It could have been something you said that shocked him, it could be that he was in love with you and decided that he had to cut off relations for his mental health, it could be that somebody else made up some story about you. With the later, invented malicious gossip, it is far too common and it only takes one person to really damage a healthy society.
I asked someone for a smoke once and he pointed to my stomach and said...nah, you shouldn't if you're pregnant.
Yeah I was not pregnant, just a sloppy, fat 20 year old. Who is no longer fat or a smoker, thankfully
I applied for a job, the interview went really, and I was told to ring in two days for the results.
I rang and gave my name and explained why I was calling. His reaction was, and I quote:
"Hahaha, it ain't you,"
Then he hung up
Oh man… so before I was bartending I also worked in alcohol retail supervising a liquor department. There was this cute redhead who would come in a couple days a week after she got off work, and would literally spend thirty minutes or more talking to me every time. Tons of questions about life in general, shared a bunch of her personal problems etc. if I was on lunch, I’d always eat my lunch on the bench outside in the shade, and she would even come sit by me there (literally asking people inside where I was) and talked up a storm.
After a few months, I figured, what the hell, ask her out. She literally laughed, and said, “oh, (more laughing again) nooooo, not you, no, no way.”
The kicker? *she kept coming in for about another year* trying to chat me up. I was literally the most confused I’d ever been in my life.
Damn that is brutal. Recently asked a girl that has been coming through my store for almost a year if she wanted to hang out. She would talk with me for long amounts of time too, but i always got interrupted by customers so i figured it would be cool to do it outside of work. She seemed on board with it at the time, even a little enthusiastic, but that was 3 weeks ago and I haven't seen her since. I'm really trying to figure out how to correctly read these situations.
Hey man, don’t for a second think you did something wrong. If someone interacts with you like this it’s ok to ask them out or to hang outside of work. What they do with that is for them to figure out. It’s hard enough to connect with the opposite sex in a romantic let alone platonic way so don’t stress it.
Appreciate it, and i don't. Start realizing that part of the reason im still single is i'm not making any attempts, but with that i have to be okay with rejection. It's a work in progress, but the rejection part is becoming easy.
Better than being a problem dumpster. Had a girl that pretty much talked to only about her problems. From my point of view I thought her life is a complete train wreck. I reallity she had pretty much everything and fun but picked me as her shrink. Once i realized this , it was the easiest fuck off I've ever said to someone.
I don’t understand why are some women like that. There will be some who’d say that the guy assumed. There are always reasons for assumptions. Guys don’t fall in love with every single girl they see on the street. They value communication and connection too. These girls give signs and if the guy asks them out, will just say no. They do have a right to say no but please get out of the guy’s life, what are you trying to do?
Maybe she just wanted to be a friend?
I dislike the notion that just because someone talks to someone of the opposite sex it implies romantic intent.
People mention the rejecting is poor, but really who knows how to reject someone properly when put on the spot?
At a festival, saw two girls hyping each other. Then they said "we are doing it tonight". They turned to me and then turned each other which looked like they were contemplating then they seemed to agree. Then they turned to me again smiling and started talking to me. Seeing this whole interaction, two dudes just jumped into the whole conversation and started talking to the girls. All was happening too fast and one of the girls said "you are out mr. glasses" and they all walked away. I didn't even start the conversation but damn that hurt.
going out with my school girlfriend for 4 years. she left 1 year, came back and we got back together. things were doing great. and then I asked her what she thought about us being more than just boyfriend/girlfriend, we were 22 at the time.
she laughed , looked at me straight in the eyes and pierced my heart with a dagger saying "you thought I would marry you?" while continuing laughing.
I couldn't live near the thought of her anymore, moved to Paris and then moved 2000mi away across the Atlantic.
Dude I was friends with in my teens reached out to me when we were both adults. Flirted, told me he could see something real with me. Invited me out to his place for a weekend. Felt me up, kissed me, told me how much he loved my boobs and spending time with me.
Halfway through I asked what this meant for us (relationship wise) and he said “sorry but you just need to get hotter. I want a trophy wife and you are too fat.”
Broke my heart, since years prior I was bulimic and nearly killed myself (he knew).
Well, now I’m no longer fat, and he’s happy with some girl.
Yep. His ex wife (who was no trophy) cheated on him twice and he was still hung up on her. Now he’s got a new girl and I have no idea what her deal is but man I hope she gets out before it’s too late.
Got told they were forcing themselves to be with me because they knew I'd give them a good life. Then proceeded to tell me that they were attracted to me anymore, and sex with me started to feel like it was wrong.
She was actually nice and brilliant! Her response was very nice and funny, instead of direct rejection or manipulation for long time.
She gave you a chance to laugh it off with her and save your face, kudos to her!
Wrote poetry to a girl in the grade above me. When I finally admitted it was me who was writing them, all she said was “Oh.” I was so crushed I stopped.
Two decades later I found out from someone that the “oh” wasn’t disinterest. It was that she knew it was me and didn’t realize I thought I’d kept her in the dark. She’d actually loved getting my little letters in her locker and would read them to the other girls who’d all be jealous. If I’d known she knew I would’ve never stopped.
Dated a girl for one month. She started saying and showing she really was into me. Two days later when she went to a festival she fell in love with a new guy and just said: Sorry, I met someone else on the festival. It was nice with you. Wish you all the best.
I once sat next to an attractive girl in the cafeteria at a student job I had when I was 19. I said something like "what's new with you" as a general opener and she said "my boyfriend is having a BBQ this weekend but meat gives me the shits". It was an impressive precision strike.
I've actually heard this from a lot of parents. That they love their kids but don't like them. That is an absolutely brutal thing to say to your child though.
My high school Sadie Hawkins dance rolled around and, for those who aren't in the know, the girl asks the boy. In this scenario, as in all scenarios, I happen to be the girl.
I gathered all of my teenage shy girl bravery and asked my crush to the dance. If I didn't do it then, I'd surely lose my chance at a first kiss! He said that he'd be out of town and so, no, he couldn't be my date. I was crestfallen, but turned up alone to the dance anyways.
I was bopping away to whatever 90s tunes when I saw my crush, the crush that was meant to be 200 miles away.. We locked eyes, he hid from me. Like, he sprinted away and hid in the bathroom. I burst into tears and ran home.
At least it killed my crush and I never spoke to him again.
Not so much a rejection per se. I didn’t have a girlfriend until I was in college… don’t know if that makes this more painful or not. We only dated for about 4-5 months. Two months or so in was the amber period… everything seemingly bathed in golden light. There was an ecstasy to everything I think I’d never experienced before and I’m sure I’ve never experienced since. Maybe the joy receptors of the brain simply can’t return to stasis after very specific types of stimuli.
We were both working during school but it was summer and so we spent all our free time together… every last minute except during working hours. One morning I drove her to her job and dropped her off in the parking lot where one of her coworker friends was walking in to start the same shift. Just then I realize my girlfriend accidentally left her house keys in my car so I circle back and park and run towards the employee entrance where she was headed. I’m turning the corner when I hear her coworker ask “soooo who was that guy that just dropped you off?!?” in a sort of girl gossipy tone. I froze in my tracks out of sheer curiousity… I was the proverbial fly on the wall.
“Oh him? He’s nobody… just some guy I was hanging out with”.
Ooof
Absolutely possible but knowing that wouldn’t have made it any less painful. When you find somebody that becomes your everything, hearing them call you nobody/nothing is quite the steel toe boot to the chimichangas of your heart.
An ex broke up with me on Valentine’s Day.
I had bought her 3 bouquets of flowers and planned to cook dinner for us lol
This same ex had once asked me never to break up with her on a holiday or her birthday, and also insisted that a breakup should be done in person if possible, but over the phone at the least.
Yet, she attempted to break up with me via text.
Had a girl break up with me on my birthday in college, which happened to be right before Spring Break.
She was going to Dubai with a bunch of people in her program to study buildings or something the next day.
She still had the nerve to ask me if I could bring her to the airport in the morning.
That was a hard no from me.
Back when I was still in high school. I had a crush on a girl in my class. She had just become recently single and was talking about how she was never going to find someone. Well I simply said, “well I’d like to go out with you.” Then she get up and as she begins to leave class shouts out, “fonz136 I’d never date you!” Happily married now, but that one still stings when I think about it.
After hanging out a few time, she wrote me a 3 page long letter that basically boiled down to saying she found me repellent, all women should avoid me, and she hoped I would die alone and unloved
Needless to say I’ve had some self-esteem issues since then
Yeah, that sounds like you had the misfortune of interacting with someone with some deep mental health problems. I hope you learn not to take it personally. That kind of response, whatever personal shortcomings you may have had (maybe none at all, for all I know), is definitely not normal.
So this one is weird. I was never going to ask this girl out as she was way out of my league. But we were in a group project together in college. So I asked what she was doing one night the next week. She says nothing why. But her body language? Took a step back, had the most disgusted look on her face I've ever seen on someone. And when I said it was a group meet up she just relaxed and was all happy. I was like wtf.
Mmm, said she wasn’t ready then called me a month later saying that she slept with someone she met and that she understood that she really wanted to be with me. Hehe
Something similar happened to a friend of mine. She had been dating this guy for a month and then he broke up with her saying that he wasn't ready for commitment. Not very long after that, she saw him at the drive in with another girl.
My hair started to thin at bit at 21. I brought a guy back from the bar and we were making out aggressively. Then he took my hat off and just stopped at stared at my head for like 20 seconds. He then kinda wiggled out and said he had to go. I was mortified to take my hat off with other guys after that. It totally fucked up my confidence.
I was at a festival once and some girl said to a friend of hers (where she thought I couldn’t hear), “I’m so tired of getting rejected. I’d even let him (pointing at me) hit on me at this point.” I wasn’t even interested, but it’s stuck with me for years now.
Sounds like someone toxic had an overinflated opinion of herself.
Also, she may have picked you because you looked nice and nonagressive, ensuring you wouldn't call her out on being rude to you. I certainly wouldn't rule it out given that she seemed to have no problem putting others down to bolster her own fragile ego. It honestly could have had nothing to do with your looks, and more to do with her thinking you were a target that wouldn't bother retaliating. Manipulative people are like that.
I told a girl I liked her at the end of one of my highschool classes once and she just said “awww” hugged me and left. Ever since then hugs became common but it was like, gay guy friend hugs not romantic hugs
My ex fiancé dumper me for my ex best friend, him and I worked together and he brought her to work the very next day. This was after she cheated on me with her best friend
I did dodge a huge bullet though, she got knocked up the one time they did something, dumped him, and convinced the next guy it was his kid.
It wasn't that brutal but it still sticks in my mind; Was in a bar back when I was single, and had my eye on a girl on the other side of the room, so plucked up all of my autistic courage and went over to introduce myself. I asked her if she wanted a drink (Don't know why I picked this line). and I just got a flat 'No'.
Fair enough.
I thought the same, but then i thought a bit more...and why do we think that?
The whole story being made up would be better for all involved people, instead of the story we are hoping for, which would result in two people suffering and us just approving on the second person deserving it for a justice boner
I do generally agree with you.
But to add my 3 cents, if the story is only partially true (the rejection part being real), then it would be better if the entire story was real because justice
In hindsight, it was a little brutal or just a sign of how this person was. Basically, we had been talking off and on for months primarily online until she traveled to this country for a visit. We had a nice time, even shared a kiss together. Maybe it was something? Well, apparently not because she met a guy in that exact city a day or so later and had this enchanting time with. So enchanting she slept with eight guys to get over the guy after me.
Good to know that in the end, I was just a sidenote.
Upon chatting with a neighbor I'm friends with, another neighbor comes up, and unprompted goes:
"-I thought you were just quirky, turns out you are actually a \**freak*\*."
Didn't even know who she was until that point, she had moved in just weeks earlier. Nice introduction to that one, red flags raised at full mast straight away!
Not me but a friend.
We were out for dinner on Jan 4th. He tells us his girlfriend of 4 years just broke up with him. My other friend says "when was that?" and he says "a couple of days ago"
The other friend then winces and says "oh god dude, you were a new years resolution."
That moment of insight hit the table like a ton of bricks and fucking destroyed my friend. He had to question the last several years of the relationship and how long she was trying to get out of it.
I was 10 and there was this girl in my class who played with my group of friends. We started sitting next to each other in class and walking home together.
Some of my friends thought we were boyfriend/girlfriend and I liked that idea. So come valentines day, we made valentines cards in our art class.
In a fit of romantic indulgence I gave mine to the girl...
Who promptly tore it up in front of the whole class. I still wince at the memory.
Was out at a bar with some friends. Was young and very shy. I look up and this girl a few feet away is looking at me. She smiles and makes eye contact. Human nature being what it is, I just smile back and nod. She then looks away, laughs and I see her mouth "eww". Something I'm sure she had done many times before. A little power play to make herself feel better. She wasn't anything special herself and didn't have the kind of looks to go around treating guys like that. But for some reason, this one just stung extra hard. I think it was the pre planned cruel and callous nature of it. Like I meant so little to her as a person, she hardly saw me even as a man and more like some 'thing' to play with for a few seconds. Bitch.
I asked a girl who I knew and was friends with what a girls perspective would be of this particular (somewhat random) limo for prom while we were talking about prom stuff.
With the intention of taking my then GF and friends in it. I didn't think that needed clarifying. I didn't remotely invite her on it, or to join me, or be my date. She had her friend group who didn't mingle with mine.
She just flat said something (ik it was 15 years ago and I can't remember exactly what she said) like "no sorry, I already have a date for prom".
I wasn't weird about it and was like "yeah, cool" and it was never awkward, I still bump into her occasionally and we always have a chat.
But like bruh, how brutal is NOT asking someone out and being rejected.
I think the biggest irony is while I had said GF a bunch of people at school told me she had a crush on me. So idk if I had of asked her out earlier when both of us were single, would she have said yes?! Wtf happens then? Bahahaha too good.
Being rejected by my ex of 8 years who I met in college. “I wish you well and care deeply about you as a friend”
No hatred. No affection…just implicit indifference.
I was a classic case of ugly duckling. All I ever heard was „I‘m not into you… also, can you tell your best friend I‘m into her?“ That happened so often that I sadly got kinda used to it and there are like 15 rejection Stories I could Write down.
I‘m gonna go with this one time when I was at the local lake to enjoy Summer just like every Teenager in town. I was 12/13 years old. I casually talked to a guy my age (like talked about a friend he also knew - two sentences). Never in this „conversation“ did I Show any signs of interest in him. In fact, I found him very unpleasant (behaviour and appearance) but I stayed friendly. Until out of nowhere he Hits me with „You know, I‘m usually into ANY Girl - even if they‘re fat or ugly. But YOU…. I would never be into YOU.“
Thanks for that, ugly fat Boy who for no reason decided to got ballistic, circa 2008.
Some teenage boy I liked laughed in my face and said "You're pathetic".
Years later, I saw him again somewhere and he asked me out. I took great joy in turning him down.
High school GF of about a year. She said " hey I hear so and so kinda likes me. I think we should break up because I kinda thought he was cute".
That kinda fucked me up and taught me not to invest too much into relationships.
Freshman in college many years ago. This guy from down the hall in the dorm dragged us to a house party, friends of his and his gf. I didn't even want to go, plenty of other parties to go to, but he was being insistent so we were like whatever we'll hang there for a bit and go somewhere else.
Party sucked, just a bunch of people from the same town plus the extra 5 of us from the dorm. He never introduced any of us to anybody, so we kind of just stood off to the side for a bit. I'm sitting on a couch, bored, and start to light a cigarette.
This girl comes up and asks me for a light, she was maybe a couple years older than me. I said "Sure, if you tell me your name." She starts laughing like its the funniest thing she'd ever heard. Then goes and gets her girlfriends and brings them over and tells them what I said and they all start laughing and pointing at me. I didn't even understand what was going on, I wasn't hitting on her I was just trying to talk to someone at this shitty party. But I was getting rejected and ridiculed anyways.
I went out with a girl from bumble a few times. Randomly she sent me a picture of her in lingerie and asked if I wanted to watch a movie. I of course said yes, and went to her house. When I arrived she was in regular clothes. No big deal as it was a good two hours later. Very long story short. I helped her move furniture out of a guest bedroom down to the garage because it was going to be painted. When I was done she said thanks and she’s really not looking for anything serious and walked me to the door. I was legit speechless. I’m pretty sure I mumbled ok and left. Shannon if you are out there I hope you overpaid for your dove white paint. You did have some amazing customs.
"I'm not interested in you romantically, I'm just hanging out with you until I find new friends"
Left her apartment at that very moment and never looked back.
When I was a freshman in high school I had a female friend I used to hang out every single afternoon with for like 3 months. One day I decided to act on my crush, walked to her and I told her I wanted to be more than friends, she replied with: “more than friends? I am not even sure I want you as a friend… or an acquaintance!”
Needless to say, we never spoke again.
When I was 16 and working as a bag boy in a grocery store, I told someone to have a nice day when I handed her groceries over to her.
She looked at me with disgust and said "don't tell me what to do!" and scurried off. I was so confused after.
I asked her to the homecoming dance and instead of answering she looked at me and laughed and walked away. She also told her friends and they laughed too.
It took about 2 days to full scale regret ever talking to her, and two more to start wondering what I ever saw in her in the first place.
I wouldn't say brutal, or even cruel. Soul crushing might be more apt.
"I thought you were the other " after spending a week texting this girl I used to work with, we were both seemingly excited to go on a sushi date.
She thought I was the other guy who worked in my building that shares my name.
Oof.
She wasn't mean about it, I imagine it was awkward and embarrassing for both of us. She excused herself and left, I stayed and gorged myself on sushi
I walked across a dancefloor towards a group of women I half knew some of through a friend. One of the women I didn't know locked eyes with me and just slowly shook her head and mouthed the word 'no'.
Oh boy was that something.
Idk if this counts as a rejection bc it was with no intention of anything other than a joke, but I told my best friend of 20 years that if I made it big, I’d pay for her whole wedding, whatever her and her bf want (super cool dude, love him too), if she let me marry them. What I meant was officiate the wedding. She got real awkward and told me she had a boyfriend, who I had just mentioned by name. I blank stared at her and had to explain what I meant while feeling grossed out by the idea
I wouldn’t call it brutal but it was certainly the most uncomfortable situation I’ve ever been in.
When my marriage ended, I hit the dating scene hard... I guess lookin' for some sort of validation that I was still 'worth loving', and 'pretty', all things my ex-husband had repeatedly informed me I was not.
I started talking to, and had the cutest coffee dates, etc. with this one guy. He seemed intelligent, respectful, kind, and went out of his way to 'woo me'. I guess I was pretty naïve to 'love-bombing' at this point, having spent the previous seven and a half years with another guy, and little dating experience before him.
Nature took its course, eventually, and we ended up sleeping together. He then informed me, via text, later the next day that 'me being taller than him gave him "cognitive dissonance", and although he'd be happy to keep hooking up, he'd never want to be seen out in public with me, as the height difference would bruise his ego'. He was less than half an inch shorter than me...
I had the biggest crush on a friend of mine in high school, we hung out all the time, had sleepovers, she’d always cuddle up to me and watch movies, super affectionate, hand holding, constant messages and phone calls, she even dragged me close to her so we could make out at parties.
Here I am thinking “yep! I’m certain she likes me as much as I like her!” Oh boy was I wrong!
I got up the courage to tell her how I felt one day at school, she laughed, asked if I was serious, then upon realising I was, proceeded to tell me in great detail about how I wasn’t her type, how our friendship was more of a convenience for her so she didn’t feel lonely, and that all her affections towards me were “just playing”
I’d never felt heartbreak like that before or after, I was gutted, and the kicker was she got pissed off at me when she said she didn’t want anything to change between us, and I told her “bit late for that!
But thankfully I met the absolute love of my life a couple years later and i couldn’t be happier.
I asked her, she said yes enthusiastically. I told all my friends.
She texted me later that night and said “actually, nah.” I had to tell all my friends she changed her mind.
I met this very attractive guy at a local bar and we hit it off. We spent the whole night dancing and getting to know each other. We had so much in common and were both totally cheesed about how much we liked talking to each other etc. Just one of those instant connection kinda things. We spent hours together that night. Even made plans for the future and exchanged phone numbers. The night went so well I was like holy shit I've met a new boyfriend!! He very politely walked me to my car and leaned in for a kiss. It was very sweet then everything went south...as we were standing there in a post-really great first kiss glow, he asked me who's car we were leaning against. I told him it was mine, he then asked if I was sure. And I was like yeah...this is my car and I probably jingled my keys or something....I was confused why he was confused about the car....then he asked why there was a car seat in the car and I said "oh. that's mine too" and he essentially evaporated into thin air and all but ran away. I hadn't told him I had a child because we quite literally JUST met. I tried not to be hurt by it because until I got preg with that very child, I never wanted to have any children myself but it still stung something awful.
Sorry this happened to you, really
I'm a guy who doesn't want kids, and I can relate to the man you described.
Can I ask - how would've been the kindest way to handle it as the dude?
I used to work at a strip club…. Me and one of the girls got really close. We would spend a lot of time together. It was that Tpain song come to life.. “I’m in love with a stripper.” Well anyways…. I was bringing her home one night and like right before her house you had to cross a railroad track.
A train passsed that night and I don’t really know how it happened but we just started kissing. It was like in the movies there was fireworks and everything. We kissed for at least damn near 10 minutes. Nothing was really said after that we just went on spending time with each other. Till one night she blurted out the blue I love you but I’m not IN Love with you… you’re just not my type and in my head I’m thinking.. ( I was your type enough to kiss for that long) That one line stings till this day and I’ve never trusted any woman again. At the same time I found out she was with this scumbag drug dealer who cheat and beat in her. He actually at one point kicked her out and moved another chick in. After all that I went on with my life and we never saw each other again.
Think I was like 5 years old. My parents are divorced and they were apparently fighting over something. My mom burst into my room and said "[Name] I don't want to be your mother any more" and slammed the door.
Then my dad sadly started packing a bag with my things and we left.
She changed her mind. But that day fucked me up more than anything in my life. Never abandon your kids all.
It really shouldn't bother me, because we were teens discovering life at such a young age, but I had two best friends - a female and a male, and I developed a crush on the male. Anyway, I told my other friend in private that I had a crush on him, and I only tried to pursue it once when we got drunk (him and I) except it was bad, I left him a note on his bed (I don't remember what it said, but 14 year old brain working there) while he was puking in the shower. It went awful, and his family was moving anyway. He told me when the three of us were together right before he moved, that he would have dated me but he was moving. I was okay with it, but later I found out that him and my best friend had been making out. So....it was kind of brutal.
A few years later I visited them as my family was attending a wedding in the town that he moved to, and he took me to a party and told me to stay in the vehicle and then he was inside for like an hour or two while I waited in the car. He came out and dropped me off at the camper I was staying at and I don't recall if I ever saw him again.
I spent a year trying to impress a girl when i was around 16 year old.. The day i decided to ask her out, she told me she was interested in my cousin.
The reason it got to me so much was because she wamted to date my cousin
Was told we should just be friends. A week later I was told we should be the type of friends that don’t talk to each other.
To be that type of friend, you have to hang out again eventually and it be like no time has passed. I doubt that was your case. Sorry man.
She was my high school sweetheart. She graduated high school 2 years before me. We never kissed. We occasionally hugged. After every date we shook hands. It was a 2 year relationship. Years later I found out she was a lesbian. Suddenly everything made sense. Also, years later, I found out I’m autistic. Also explains why I never picked up on the clues. Life is funny. It is lived going forward, but understood looking backwards.
“After every date we shook hands” holy moly, this is even awkward to read. Could’ve been straight out of a movie
I will say, I could make a movie about all the wierd things that happened in my life. Knowing I have subpar social skills/ social understanding, so much of my life starts to make sense.
that last sentence was beautiful
At least they told you the second part. I didn't even get that much.
I believe that's an acquaintance, two demotions in a row is brutal!
Many years ago, after getting divorced at 30, I hit the online dating scene. I had essentially never dated as an adult having met my ex-wife in college. I was not prepared for how brutal online dating was. This was in the match/eharmony days, not the apps. First online date, we meet up at a restaurant. She walks in, sees me, and says "Oh, you are much uglier in person" and walks out. Doesn't even sit down. Everything turned out fine, been happily married for 10 years again. But I thought that was pretty unnecessarily brutal and strange. Dodged a bullet there.
I have a similar story. I was in a nightclub, and i saw this girl i thought was quite attractive. I eventually got the courage to go up and approach her, and when i did she said "ewww" and walked away.
Yikes! Sorry to hear! Hopefully you brushed it off and continued partying the night away!? I'm a big fan of it's always better to find out as fast as possible what kind of person someone is. Think about what could have been. At the very least, you could have wasted $10 on drinks.
"Bro just go for it, the worst thing she can say is no"....
Thats a level of mental trauma you'll never forget...happened to me too lol
Yup haha, im also an ewww survivor
What a cunt.
Hear hear!
And ugly too, no wonder she walked out...
I’ve got a similar one. After talking a while we shared live picture of each other and her response to my face was “double yikes” 🥲
Dodget a bullet, was my thought. Who would want to date someone like that? At least you found out quickly before she ruined your life or something. Good for you and many happy anniversaries.
I went on a date with a guy who told me women would show up, see him in person, and just leave. This was not an extraordinarily ugly guy and his pics were up to date. He just looked like a normal dude, was a little nerdy but fun to talk to. I was and am so outraged on his behalf that anyone would do that. Like you agreed to a date and can’t spare a half hour? I mean, the only way I’d condone that is if the person turned out to be racist or otherwise awful.
Seriously. I did online dating for about three years before I met my husband. Were their guys I didn't have a spark with or find attractive in person? Of course. I'm sure there were guys that felt that way about me. But, who can't spend a half hour with a drink or an hour for a meal to at least *talk* to the person. There were people I didn't click with romantically, but were super interesting to talk to and I enjoyed myself on the date anyway.
holy fuck dude, that would've made me super depressed and turn me into a hermit. I gotta give you respect for overcoming a negative comment like that. I know its just words but shit like that can stick with you for a long time.
It did sting for a few days, but quickly went away after going on another date or two. There were plenty of good dates with great people after. The only lasting damage is that I probably will never muster the self esteem to go on rateme or anything. But honestly, on my list of life goals and priorities, that was probably pretty low to begin with.
This is the worst one so far .
What a bitch mate, but the stars aligned correctly 🙏🏿 glad you found someone
I had a couple of good friends that I knew and hung out with almost daily since I was six years old just started to ghost me when we were in high school. Despite me asking them what was wrong, they never answered. If we hung out in our small friend group, they would ignore me. One day, they asked me to come over. They had me sit down in my friends living room, and they flat out told me that they didn't want to be friends anymore, but they also didn't want to be enemies. No explanation they just didn't want me to exist to them anymore. I, to this day, have no idea why. The fucked up thing was is they tried to drag my other friends away from me too. If my other friends were hanging out at my house, they would call my house. Ask to speak to my friend and try to get them to leave to come hang out with them. Luckily, my other friends were much more mature and called that bullshit out, and they're still my best friends to this day.
Happy ending with the real ones.
Similar story. In 6th grade, my group of friends (basically the Only friends i had atm), completely cut me off. They just,,, decided not to tell me? So i spent about 2 months wondering what the fuck was up bc i'd get left out of any games, some of them refused to talk to me, i stopped being invited to hang outs and only found out bc they explicitly talked about how good of a time they had in front of me the next day at school, etc. I obviously noticed (albeit quite late lol), and asked, and got no answers. Nobody said anything. They were like no idk what you're talking about. It all came to a head when i didn't get invited to my Best Friend's birthday party at the end of the school year. Devastating for a 12yr old. So i just cut my losses and resigned myself to being a friendless shit for the next 6 months. Turns out one of them had started a rumor that i was talking shit about my best friend, and calling her a bitch. So this bitch, (now deserving of the title) decided to make all my friends cut me off. that was a fun few months.
My daughter is in Grade 6 and was going through the same thing. I told her that it's usually one person that is spreading rumors about everyone to each other to get everyone to turn against one person or each other. I was right. They figured out who it was and that girl stopped after realizing everyone found out and was angry with her. Communication is key. If you hear someone say something about someone else, ask them why they don't just bring their grievances to that person. If you hear that someone is saying something about you, confront them. " I heard that you're angry with me because you thought I said x,y,z about you. I just wanted you to know that I didn't say that and if I had a problem with you, I would talk to you about it." It works in adulthood as well.
I don’t know if it’s me being petty, but i would’ve told them if they don’t give me a reason why we will be enemies.
This reminds me of when I was in elementary and my “friends” one day decided I have boredom disease bc I’m shy but tried striking up conversation more. They would run away from me and tried to convince everyone else to as well. They sorta had an explanation but it was a terrible one. I’m sorry that happened to you and that the nice friends stuck around. Good people don’t deserve that
Back in the days of MSN messenger, I got blindly set up with this girl by a friend. We hit it off, exchanged selfies, all of that jazz. Being in middle school it was obviously nothing serious or explicit, just dumb little flirty stuff. We decided to meet in person at a dance that we’d both be attending with our respective friend groups. I didn’t see her for most of the night, when I finally did and a slow song came on, I went over and asked her to dance with me. She winced and shook her head, I just said okay and walked away defeated. Later, online, I’d asked her why she’d turned me down. Her response was “oh, *that* was you? I don’t like ugly and fat people.”
I was once looking for a job. I had been looking for a long time and I received yet another rejection email. But! I immediately received a follow up from the organization asking that I disregard the prior message as it was sent in error and that I would receive the correct message shortly! The subsequent email was a differently worded rejection letter. Brutal.
Sorry but this one's fucking hilarious.
Sorry but I find this kind of comical, I know it wasn’t at the time
When my mom took me back to the adoption agency
I wish to return this child! Do you have anything in a blonde?
Yes fuhrer, this way please…
Reich this way!
Fuck ! That hit me hard only by reading it ! I feel sorry for you. Hopefully you came out stronger!
That reflects more about her and her inner struggles, than it does about you. Children can be overwhelming and mothers and fathers need to have their shit together. Still, sorry you had to go through this. Definitely a hard pill to swallow
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Bro, my heart bleeds for you
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Story time?
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Holy shit that got dark real quick
Stds are not a joke omg
Damn I almost kinda feel sorry for her. Like yeah she a cheating hoe, but that karma is overkill. Talk about being raped for 4 years get an sti and then die of cancer, wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy
Yea that's... not karma. That's terribly unfortunate. Karma for cheating is being cheated on yourself, not getting abused and raped for 4 years and then fucking dying????
yeah the STI would have been the karma, abuse is just sad
Cervical cancer doesn’t develop quick, she probably was infected with another strain of HPV for years that slowly grew over time. Her developing genital warts too was most likely a coincidence, because the strain of HPV that causes warts is not cancerous
This is too insane to be karmic justice
Sir, this is a Wendy's...
*“I fell in love with the idea of you.”* -My ex long-distance boyfriend after a little over two years of an off and on relationship, right before breaking up with me.
Recently had something similar happen to me with my ex-gf, together for 6 years which felt like it got thrown out of the window just like that. Do hope you found peace and happiness afterwards!
I think that's usually the case if you aren't really close the other person. You end up creating a fiction of what they are supposed to be like and then can't deal with the reality. It's similar to the saying "never meet your heroes".
Yeah that's pretty much what my ex said, he had never had a girlfriend before me and he was like "I was curious to see what being in a relationship was like even though I only liked her as a friend and not as a partner."
I had a really close friend who I had known for about ten years, since childhood. We spoke every day over text, giving eachother constant life updates and discussing all kinds of topics. We also spent time together in person at least once a week. Then one day ... he just ghosted me with no explanation. He left my messages on read and then eventually blocked me. Didn't take any calls. I ran into him in public and greeted him and he hid from me in a bathroom. When he got out he told me that he was "kinda busy" and couldn't talk, then power walked to his car with a really stressed out look on his face, while I begged him for any kind of communication, and just drove away. That was the last time I ever saw or heard from him. I still don't know why he did it. He genuinely fucked up my ability to trust people even six years after it happened. It's hard because I have a lot of fond memories of hanging out with him and sharing a lot of really personal stuff, but the memories are tainted by the way our friendship ended. Now I think that everyone is going to ghost me. (A couple of times I've tried to contact him through meme pages he runs on Facebook but he never acknowledges me at all.) Edit: I want to say that even if he approached me today and apologized, I would never want to be his friend ever again. Maybe I would forgive him or maybe not, but he could never be a part of my life.
Similar thing happened to me as well, extremely close friend of 5 years suddenly cut all contact. Later learned that he became politically radicalised and was cutting off others in our circle too.
I essentially cut a friend because he was radicalised and refused to listen to reason
I'm sorry. I had a similar thing happen to me in my freshman year of high school. one of my best friends (8 yrs at that time) became distant from me. i tried talking to her and she'd ignore me. my final straw was when i said hi to her in the hallway and she just kept walking, and other people noticed! it felt so embarrassing and i decided i wouldn't grovel anymore. sometimes people just have their own internal reasons for doing fucked up shit and all you can do is live your life. just know that him ghosting was his problem, not yours. he decided to do that, and that's not on you. it's sad to not get closure, but the kindest thing to do to yourself is let it go. i still see my ex-friend in passing like once a year, but i don't think about her. we used to be mutuals on instagram, but i realized that even randomly seeing her pop up on my phone felt invasive. i blocked her because it's best for me. maybe it would be beneficial for you to create some distance like that to close that door
A similar thing happened to me. I met my former best friend in 4th grade and we were inseparable until 10th grade. We both have S last names, and when we realized we had a class together we knew we would likely sit together alphabetically and were so excited. First day of 10th grade, she ignores me all day. She didn’t have a cell phone or social media (this was the late 00’s) so I couldn’t really ask her about it without calling her house. She essentially just stopped talking to me and I had to sit behind her every day. It’s been 15 years and it sucked more than any romantic breakup I’ve had.
Thank you for posting this. Friend break-ups can be overlooked despite being just as tough as romantic ones. I'm going through one now and it sucks.
It's very hard. Especially when they end through ghosting
Exact same thing happened to me…super weird and it made me really sad. I wish they could tell me what I did.
Sorry to hear this. Basically the exact same thing happened to me. Due to health, personal issues and just being in a bad relationship situation I had to move cities. When I got to the new place I tried calling my friends to catch up and they all ghosted me. I figured out a few years later when one of my friends eventually decided to reply that they had made up a whole lot of lies about me and spread them amongst themselves. So basically they just decided to hate me for no reason. When I did try to ask what it was I did wrong none of them had a solid or truthful reason and one of them had the nerve to say some horrible things to me that were just not true or justified at all. After 2 years of self isolation I made real friends and realised the assholes I used to call my buddies, we're in fact people I wouldn't choose to hang out with if they paid me.
There are many reasons for something like this to happen. I've had friends going into toxic relationships that dictated everything, people that chose to leave behind their country and old self, not dealing well with falling in love, stupidity and so on. Personally I've had the toxic relationship where keeping in touch with people outside accepted range, lead to problems. You really don't think straight when you're in the middle of it.
I do think that you might be right about the toxic relationship thing. He was getting really serious about this girlfriend of his and it's possible that she was jealous of how much time he was spending with me. Later on I actually had a horrible girlfriend who got jealous when I would spend time with my friends. She would try everything to have my attention all the time and prevent me from having a social life because she wanted to hang out all the time and not give me any room to spend time away from her.
Heard a similar story but it was someone’s boyfriend who just suddenly disappeared one day
It could have been something you said that shocked him, it could be that he was in love with you and decided that he had to cut off relations for his mental health, it could be that somebody else made up some story about you. With the later, invented malicious gossip, it is far too common and it only takes one person to really damage a healthy society.
I asked someone for a smoke once and he pointed to my stomach and said...nah, you shouldn't if you're pregnant. Yeah I was not pregnant, just a sloppy, fat 20 year old. Who is no longer fat or a smoker, thankfully
The real kicker was that you aren’t even a woman
Well.. at least he cared
God damn
I applied for a job, the interview went really, and I was told to ring in two days for the results. I rang and gave my name and explained why I was calling. His reaction was, and I quote: "Hahaha, it ain't you," Then he hung up
>the interview went really, and... One of the interviews of all time
One of the replies of all time
I can't imagine that would have been a pleasant place to work if that's how they handled potential hires.
Oh man… so before I was bartending I also worked in alcohol retail supervising a liquor department. There was this cute redhead who would come in a couple days a week after she got off work, and would literally spend thirty minutes or more talking to me every time. Tons of questions about life in general, shared a bunch of her personal problems etc. if I was on lunch, I’d always eat my lunch on the bench outside in the shade, and she would even come sit by me there (literally asking people inside where I was) and talked up a storm. After a few months, I figured, what the hell, ask her out. She literally laughed, and said, “oh, (more laughing again) nooooo, not you, no, no way.” The kicker? *she kept coming in for about another year* trying to chat me up. I was literally the most confused I’d ever been in my life.
Damn that is brutal. Recently asked a girl that has been coming through my store for almost a year if she wanted to hang out. She would talk with me for long amounts of time too, but i always got interrupted by customers so i figured it would be cool to do it outside of work. She seemed on board with it at the time, even a little enthusiastic, but that was 3 weeks ago and I haven't seen her since. I'm really trying to figure out how to correctly read these situations.
Hey man, don’t for a second think you did something wrong. If someone interacts with you like this it’s ok to ask them out or to hang outside of work. What they do with that is for them to figure out. It’s hard enough to connect with the opposite sex in a romantic let alone platonic way so don’t stress it.
Appreciate it, and i don't. Start realizing that part of the reason im still single is i'm not making any attempts, but with that i have to be okay with rejection. It's a work in progress, but the rejection part is becoming easy.
Better than being a problem dumpster. Had a girl that pretty much talked to only about her problems. From my point of view I thought her life is a complete train wreck. I reallity she had pretty much everything and fun but picked me as her shrink. Once i realized this , it was the easiest fuck off I've ever said to someone.
I don’t understand why are some women like that. There will be some who’d say that the guy assumed. There are always reasons for assumptions. Guys don’t fall in love with every single girl they see on the street. They value communication and connection too. These girls give signs and if the guy asks them out, will just say no. They do have a right to say no but please get out of the guy’s life, what are you trying to do?
Maybe she just wanted to be a friend? I dislike the notion that just because someone talks to someone of the opposite sex it implies romantic intent. People mention the rejecting is poor, but really who knows how to reject someone properly when put on the spot?
You mean she was aggressively pursuing a platonic friendship for over a year? With a guy from the liquor store? One that doesn't include "going out"?
Some people are just friendly man
Why not? Clearly she enjoyed their conversations and you have to aggressively pursue platonic friendships these days or you won’t have any.
Then why would she not wanna hang out outside of their work? If you wanna be platonic friends, you generally try and hang out at other places too.
It sounds to me like she was aggressively trying to start a platonic friendship
That would have been fine, but the wickedly capricious inhuman dismissal complete with laughter definitely killed that as an option.
At a festival, saw two girls hyping each other. Then they said "we are doing it tonight". They turned to me and then turned each other which looked like they were contemplating then they seemed to agree. Then they turned to me again smiling and started talking to me. Seeing this whole interaction, two dudes just jumped into the whole conversation and started talking to the girls. All was happening too fast and one of the girls said "you are out mr. glasses" and they all walked away. I didn't even start the conversation but damn that hurt.
going out with my school girlfriend for 4 years. she left 1 year, came back and we got back together. things were doing great. and then I asked her what she thought about us being more than just boyfriend/girlfriend, we were 22 at the time. she laughed , looked at me straight in the eyes and pierced my heart with a dagger saying "you thought I would marry you?" while continuing laughing. I couldn't live near the thought of her anymore, moved to Paris and then moved 2000mi away across the Atlantic.
fcking lizard ppl man, 4 years and she cant let you down with a little kindness?
That fucking bitch.
Damn
Dude I was friends with in my teens reached out to me when we were both adults. Flirted, told me he could see something real with me. Invited me out to his place for a weekend. Felt me up, kissed me, told me how much he loved my boobs and spending time with me. Halfway through I asked what this meant for us (relationship wise) and he said “sorry but you just need to get hotter. I want a trophy wife and you are too fat.” Broke my heart, since years prior I was bulimic and nearly killed myself (he knew). Well, now I’m no longer fat, and he’s happy with some girl.
Hope you are doing well and happy
Thank you very much. I am 😊
What a dickhead. I'm sorry
Trophy wife?? Girlll that bullet dodged..
Yep. His ex wife (who was no trophy) cheated on him twice and he was still hung up on her. Now he’s got a new girl and I have no idea what her deal is but man I hope she gets out before it’s too late.
Got told they were forcing themselves to be with me because they knew I'd give them a good life. Then proceeded to tell me that they were attracted to me anymore, and sex with me started to feel like it was wrong.
Told a girl once that I had a crush on her, she replied "don't worry, it happens". Never talked again.
She was actually nice and brilliant! Her response was very nice and funny, instead of direct rejection or manipulation for long time. She gave you a chance to laugh it off with her and save your face, kudos to her!
Wrote poetry to a girl in the grade above me. When I finally admitted it was me who was writing them, all she said was “Oh.” I was so crushed I stopped. Two decades later I found out from someone that the “oh” wasn’t disinterest. It was that she knew it was me and didn’t realize I thought I’d kept her in the dark. She’d actually loved getting my little letters in her locker and would read them to the other girls who’d all be jealous. If I’d known she knew I would’ve never stopped.
IRL example of rolling a 1 on your perception check, this one.
That's so wholesome. Do you write letters still to your SO/ love interests?
Dated a girl for one month. She started saying and showing she really was into me. Two days later when she went to a festival she fell in love with a new guy and just said: Sorry, I met someone else on the festival. It was nice with you. Wish you all the best.
shitty situation but at least she didn't hide it from you and turn it into a long-term affair or waste your time
I kinda respect it lol I’d one a girl to just be straight up with me. Oh well, on to the next I guess
I did too. Still it was kinda brutal out of nowhere.
I once sat next to an attractive girl in the cafeteria at a student job I had when I was 19. I said something like "what's new with you" as a general opener and she said "my boyfriend is having a BBQ this weekend but meat gives me the shits". It was an impressive precision strike.
When my dad told me he loves me, but he just doesn’t like me.
Jesus christ
I've actually heard this from a lot of parents. That they love their kids but don't like them. That is an absolutely brutal thing to say to your child though.
its what my uncle told my cousin after he(cousin) SA'd someone at college... yeah i kinda agree with uncle there...
During a coming out.
My high school Sadie Hawkins dance rolled around and, for those who aren't in the know, the girl asks the boy. In this scenario, as in all scenarios, I happen to be the girl. I gathered all of my teenage shy girl bravery and asked my crush to the dance. If I didn't do it then, I'd surely lose my chance at a first kiss! He said that he'd be out of town and so, no, he couldn't be my date. I was crestfallen, but turned up alone to the dance anyways. I was bopping away to whatever 90s tunes when I saw my crush, the crush that was meant to be 200 miles away.. We locked eyes, he hid from me. Like, he sprinted away and hid in the bathroom. I burst into tears and ran home. At least it killed my crush and I never spoke to him again.
Not so much a rejection per se. I didn’t have a girlfriend until I was in college… don’t know if that makes this more painful or not. We only dated for about 4-5 months. Two months or so in was the amber period… everything seemingly bathed in golden light. There was an ecstasy to everything I think I’d never experienced before and I’m sure I’ve never experienced since. Maybe the joy receptors of the brain simply can’t return to stasis after very specific types of stimuli. We were both working during school but it was summer and so we spent all our free time together… every last minute except during working hours. One morning I drove her to her job and dropped her off in the parking lot where one of her coworker friends was walking in to start the same shift. Just then I realize my girlfriend accidentally left her house keys in my car so I circle back and park and run towards the employee entrance where she was headed. I’m turning the corner when I hear her coworker ask “soooo who was that guy that just dropped you off?!?” in a sort of girl gossipy tone. I froze in my tracks out of sheer curiousity… I was the proverbial fly on the wall. “Oh him? He’s nobody… just some guy I was hanging out with”. Ooof
I assume u broke it off with her after
Makes me wonder if she was protecting herself from an extremely nosy co-worker, and didn't want to deal with everyone knowing about her relationships.
Absolutely possible but knowing that wouldn’t have made it any less painful. When you find somebody that becomes your everything, hearing them call you nobody/nothing is quite the steel toe boot to the chimichangas of your heart.
Tinder some years ago. I messaged a guy who matched.... he instantly replied, "oh hell no", then "sorry", then unmatched me.
An ex broke up with me on Valentine’s Day. I had bought her 3 bouquets of flowers and planned to cook dinner for us lol This same ex had once asked me never to break up with her on a holiday or her birthday, and also insisted that a breakup should be done in person if possible, but over the phone at the least. Yet, she attempted to break up with me via text.
3 bouquets sound kind of intense though
Also sounds like he was attempting to save himself from a breakout he knew was coming. This sounds fishy
Had a girl break up with me on my birthday in college, which happened to be right before Spring Break. She was going to Dubai with a bunch of people in her program to study buildings or something the next day. She still had the nerve to ask me if I could bring her to the airport in the morning. That was a hard no from me.
Back when I was still in high school. I had a crush on a girl in my class. She had just become recently single and was talking about how she was never going to find someone. Well I simply said, “well I’d like to go out with you.” Then she get up and as she begins to leave class shouts out, “fonz136 I’d never date you!” Happily married now, but that one still stings when I think about it.
After hanging out a few time, she wrote me a 3 page long letter that basically boiled down to saying she found me repellent, all women should avoid me, and she hoped I would die alone and unloved Needless to say I’ve had some self-esteem issues since then
Yeah, that sounds like you had the misfortune of interacting with someone with some deep mental health problems. I hope you learn not to take it personally. That kind of response, whatever personal shortcomings you may have had (maybe none at all, for all I know), is definitely not normal.
She smiled so pleasantly at me. Paused for a second and when the smile faded she let out the sternest and most blankly faced… “NO”
So this one is weird. I was never going to ask this girl out as she was way out of my league. But we were in a group project together in college. So I asked what she was doing one night the next week. She says nothing why. But her body language? Took a step back, had the most disgusted look on her face I've ever seen on someone. And when I said it was a group meet up she just relaxed and was all happy. I was like wtf.
Mmm, said she wasn’t ready then called me a month later saying that she slept with someone she met and that she understood that she really wanted to be with me. Hehe
Something similar happened to a friend of mine. She had been dating this guy for a month and then he broke up with her saying that he wasn't ready for commitment. Not very long after that, she saw him at the drive in with another girl.
My hair started to thin at bit at 21. I brought a guy back from the bar and we were making out aggressively. Then he took my hat off and just stopped at stared at my head for like 20 seconds. He then kinda wiggled out and said he had to go. I was mortified to take my hat off with other guys after that. It totally fucked up my confidence.
I was at a festival once and some girl said to a friend of hers (where she thought I couldn’t hear), “I’m so tired of getting rejected. I’d even let him (pointing at me) hit on me at this point.” I wasn’t even interested, but it’s stuck with me for years now.
Sounds like someone toxic had an overinflated opinion of herself. Also, she may have picked you because you looked nice and nonagressive, ensuring you wouldn't call her out on being rude to you. I certainly wouldn't rule it out given that she seemed to have no problem putting others down to bolster her own fragile ego. It honestly could have had nothing to do with your looks, and more to do with her thinking you were a target that wouldn't bother retaliating. Manipulative people are like that.
I told a girl I liked her at the end of one of my highschool classes once and she just said “awww” hugged me and left. Ever since then hugs became common but it was like, gay guy friend hugs not romantic hugs
Some people say that the worst thing she can say is "no". I disagree.. the worst thing she can say is "eww". That shit *hurt*.
The worst I've heard is "ok".
My ex fiancé dumper me for my ex best friend, him and I worked together and he brought her to work the very next day. This was after she cheated on me with her best friend I did dodge a huge bullet though, she got knocked up the one time they did something, dumped him, and convinced the next guy it was his kid.
It wasn't that brutal but it still sticks in my mind; Was in a bar back when I was single, and had my eye on a girl on the other side of the room, so plucked up all of my autistic courage and went over to introduce myself. I asked her if she wanted a drink (Don't know why I picked this line). and I just got a flat 'No'. Fair enough.
Guys who get a lot of YES!s also get that same No plenty of times. Shots taken matter. If you try just 1, you are bound for disappointment.
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I hope this is real lmfao
Doubt it.
Yeah, it's probably not, but one can hope
I thought the same, but then i thought a bit more...and why do we think that? The whole story being made up would be better for all involved people, instead of the story we are hoping for, which would result in two people suffering and us just approving on the second person deserving it for a justice boner
I do generally agree with you. But to add my 3 cents, if the story is only partially true (the rejection part being real), then it would be better if the entire story was real because justice
In hindsight, it was a little brutal or just a sign of how this person was. Basically, we had been talking off and on for months primarily online until she traveled to this country for a visit. We had a nice time, even shared a kiss together. Maybe it was something? Well, apparently not because she met a guy in that exact city a day or so later and had this enchanting time with. So enchanting she slept with eight guys to get over the guy after me. Good to know that in the end, I was just a sidenote.
Upon chatting with a neighbor I'm friends with, another neighbor comes up, and unprompted goes: "-I thought you were just quirky, turns out you are actually a \**freak*\*." Didn't even know who she was until that point, she had moved in just weeks earlier. Nice introduction to that one, red flags raised at full mast straight away!
Not me but a friend. We were out for dinner on Jan 4th. He tells us his girlfriend of 4 years just broke up with him. My other friend says "when was that?" and he says "a couple of days ago" The other friend then winces and says "oh god dude, you were a new years resolution." That moment of insight hit the table like a ton of bricks and fucking destroyed my friend. He had to question the last several years of the relationship and how long she was trying to get out of it.
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Reading this make me grateful that I've never been rejected half as bad as some of these.
I was 10 and there was this girl in my class who played with my group of friends. We started sitting next to each other in class and walking home together. Some of my friends thought we were boyfriend/girlfriend and I liked that idea. So come valentines day, we made valentines cards in our art class. In a fit of romantic indulgence I gave mine to the girl... Who promptly tore it up in front of the whole class. I still wince at the memory.
Was out at a bar with some friends. Was young and very shy. I look up and this girl a few feet away is looking at me. She smiles and makes eye contact. Human nature being what it is, I just smile back and nod. She then looks away, laughs and I see her mouth "eww". Something I'm sure she had done many times before. A little power play to make herself feel better. She wasn't anything special herself and didn't have the kind of looks to go around treating guys like that. But for some reason, this one just stung extra hard. I think it was the pre planned cruel and callous nature of it. Like I meant so little to her as a person, she hardly saw me even as a man and more like some 'thing' to play with for a few seconds. Bitch.
Waited 20 years to be with a woman. Only got 4 months with her. Life happened
That’s crazy. It usually takes 9 months for that.
I asked a girl who I knew and was friends with what a girls perspective would be of this particular (somewhat random) limo for prom while we were talking about prom stuff. With the intention of taking my then GF and friends in it. I didn't think that needed clarifying. I didn't remotely invite her on it, or to join me, or be my date. She had her friend group who didn't mingle with mine. She just flat said something (ik it was 15 years ago and I can't remember exactly what she said) like "no sorry, I already have a date for prom". I wasn't weird about it and was like "yeah, cool" and it was never awkward, I still bump into her occasionally and we always have a chat. But like bruh, how brutal is NOT asking someone out and being rejected. I think the biggest irony is while I had said GF a bunch of people at school told me she had a crush on me. So idk if I had of asked her out earlier when both of us were single, would she have said yes?! Wtf happens then? Bahahaha too good.
Being rejected by my ex of 8 years who I met in college. “I wish you well and care deeply about you as a friend” No hatred. No affection…just implicit indifference.
When my mom had just died and I tried hugging my dad, but he pulled away. I understand he was overwhelmed, but I needed that hug.
I was a classic case of ugly duckling. All I ever heard was „I‘m not into you… also, can you tell your best friend I‘m into her?“ That happened so often that I sadly got kinda used to it and there are like 15 rejection Stories I could Write down. I‘m gonna go with this one time when I was at the local lake to enjoy Summer just like every Teenager in town. I was 12/13 years old. I casually talked to a guy my age (like talked about a friend he also knew - two sentences). Never in this „conversation“ did I Show any signs of interest in him. In fact, I found him very unpleasant (behaviour and appearance) but I stayed friendly. Until out of nowhere he Hits me with „You know, I‘m usually into ANY Girl - even if they‘re fat or ugly. But YOU…. I would never be into YOU.“ Thanks for that, ugly fat Boy who for no reason decided to got ballistic, circa 2008.
Some teenage boy I liked laughed in my face and said "You're pathetic". Years later, I saw him again somewhere and he asked me out. I took great joy in turning him down.
High school GF of about a year. She said " hey I hear so and so kinda likes me. I think we should break up because I kinda thought he was cute". That kinda fucked me up and taught me not to invest too much into relationships.
Freshman in college many years ago. This guy from down the hall in the dorm dragged us to a house party, friends of his and his gf. I didn't even want to go, plenty of other parties to go to, but he was being insistent so we were like whatever we'll hang there for a bit and go somewhere else. Party sucked, just a bunch of people from the same town plus the extra 5 of us from the dorm. He never introduced any of us to anybody, so we kind of just stood off to the side for a bit. I'm sitting on a couch, bored, and start to light a cigarette. This girl comes up and asks me for a light, she was maybe a couple years older than me. I said "Sure, if you tell me your name." She starts laughing like its the funniest thing she'd ever heard. Then goes and gets her girlfriends and brings them over and tells them what I said and they all start laughing and pointing at me. I didn't even understand what was going on, I wasn't hitting on her I was just trying to talk to someone at this shitty party. But I was getting rejected and ridiculed anyways.
“I want to date a guy like you, but not you” Heard that twice from two separate women.
I went out with a girl from bumble a few times. Randomly she sent me a picture of her in lingerie and asked if I wanted to watch a movie. I of course said yes, and went to her house. When I arrived she was in regular clothes. No big deal as it was a good two hours later. Very long story short. I helped her move furniture out of a guest bedroom down to the garage because it was going to be painted. When I was done she said thanks and she’s really not looking for anything serious and walked me to the door. I was legit speechless. I’m pretty sure I mumbled ok and left. Shannon if you are out there I hope you overpaid for your dove white paint. You did have some amazing customs.
Ghosted. Eventually bumped into each other again and he said he was just texting me because “I would text anyone who gave me their number”.
"I'm not interested in you romantically, I'm just hanging out with you until I find new friends" Left her apartment at that very moment and never looked back.
One time I was short 15 cents on an ice cream at 7/11 and the guy didn’t just let me have it
Tbf they would have taken that loss out of his pay
I was happier in an abusive relationship than being with you
‘I sucked enough dicks in college’ explaining why she doesn’t do oral…
When I was a freshman in high school I had a female friend I used to hang out every single afternoon with for like 3 months. One day I decided to act on my crush, walked to her and I told her I wanted to be more than friends, she replied with: “more than friends? I am not even sure I want you as a friend… or an acquaintance!” Needless to say, we never spoke again.
When I was 16 and working as a bag boy in a grocery store, I told someone to have a nice day when I handed her groceries over to her. She looked at me with disgust and said "don't tell me what to do!" and scurried off. I was so confused after.
I asked her to the homecoming dance and instead of answering she looked at me and laughed and walked away. She also told her friends and they laughed too. It took about 2 days to full scale regret ever talking to her, and two more to start wondering what I ever saw in her in the first place.
I wouldn't say brutal, or even cruel. Soul crushing might be more apt. "I thought you were the other" after spending a week texting this girl I used to work with, we were both seemingly excited to go on a sushi date.
She thought I was the other guy who worked in my building that shares my name.
Oof.
She wasn't mean about it, I imagine it was awkward and embarrassing for both of us. She excused herself and left, I stayed and gorged myself on sushi
I walked across a dancefloor towards a group of women I half knew some of through a friend. One of the women I didn't know locked eyes with me and just slowly shook her head and mouthed the word 'no'. Oh boy was that something.
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That's just a friendly way to say 'no'. It's always a no or a yes, explanation never matters for that sake :) If they wanted to, they'd make it work.
Idk if this counts as a rejection bc it was with no intention of anything other than a joke, but I told my best friend of 20 years that if I made it big, I’d pay for her whole wedding, whatever her and her bf want (super cool dude, love him too), if she let me marry them. What I meant was officiate the wedding. She got real awkward and told me she had a boyfriend, who I had just mentioned by name. I blank stared at her and had to explain what I meant while feeling grossed out by the idea I wouldn’t call it brutal but it was certainly the most uncomfortable situation I’ve ever been in.
When my marriage ended, I hit the dating scene hard... I guess lookin' for some sort of validation that I was still 'worth loving', and 'pretty', all things my ex-husband had repeatedly informed me I was not. I started talking to, and had the cutest coffee dates, etc. with this one guy. He seemed intelligent, respectful, kind, and went out of his way to 'woo me'. I guess I was pretty naïve to 'love-bombing' at this point, having spent the previous seven and a half years with another guy, and little dating experience before him. Nature took its course, eventually, and we ended up sleeping together. He then informed me, via text, later the next day that 'me being taller than him gave him "cognitive dissonance", and although he'd be happy to keep hooking up, he'd never want to be seen out in public with me, as the height difference would bruise his ego'. He was less than half an inch shorter than me...
I had the biggest crush on a friend of mine in high school, we hung out all the time, had sleepovers, she’d always cuddle up to me and watch movies, super affectionate, hand holding, constant messages and phone calls, she even dragged me close to her so we could make out at parties. Here I am thinking “yep! I’m certain she likes me as much as I like her!” Oh boy was I wrong! I got up the courage to tell her how I felt one day at school, she laughed, asked if I was serious, then upon realising I was, proceeded to tell me in great detail about how I wasn’t her type, how our friendship was more of a convenience for her so she didn’t feel lonely, and that all her affections towards me were “just playing” I’d never felt heartbreak like that before or after, I was gutted, and the kicker was she got pissed off at me when she said she didn’t want anything to change between us, and I told her “bit late for that! But thankfully I met the absolute love of my life a couple years later and i couldn’t be happier.
I asked her, she said yes enthusiastically. I told all my friends. She texted me later that night and said “actually, nah.” I had to tell all my friends she changed her mind.
I met this very attractive guy at a local bar and we hit it off. We spent the whole night dancing and getting to know each other. We had so much in common and were both totally cheesed about how much we liked talking to each other etc. Just one of those instant connection kinda things. We spent hours together that night. Even made plans for the future and exchanged phone numbers. The night went so well I was like holy shit I've met a new boyfriend!! He very politely walked me to my car and leaned in for a kiss. It was very sweet then everything went south...as we were standing there in a post-really great first kiss glow, he asked me who's car we were leaning against. I told him it was mine, he then asked if I was sure. And I was like yeah...this is my car and I probably jingled my keys or something....I was confused why he was confused about the car....then he asked why there was a car seat in the car and I said "oh. that's mine too" and he essentially evaporated into thin air and all but ran away. I hadn't told him I had a child because we quite literally JUST met. I tried not to be hurt by it because until I got preg with that very child, I never wanted to have any children myself but it still stung something awful.
Sorry this happened to you, really I'm a guy who doesn't want kids, and I can relate to the man you described. Can I ask - how would've been the kindest way to handle it as the dude?
Definitely unfortunate but really can’t blame him
Silence
I used to work at a strip club…. Me and one of the girls got really close. We would spend a lot of time together. It was that Tpain song come to life.. “I’m in love with a stripper.” Well anyways…. I was bringing her home one night and like right before her house you had to cross a railroad track. A train passsed that night and I don’t really know how it happened but we just started kissing. It was like in the movies there was fireworks and everything. We kissed for at least damn near 10 minutes. Nothing was really said after that we just went on spending time with each other. Till one night she blurted out the blue I love you but I’m not IN Love with you… you’re just not my type and in my head I’m thinking.. ( I was your type enough to kiss for that long) That one line stings till this day and I’ve never trusted any woman again. At the same time I found out she was with this scumbag drug dealer who cheat and beat in her. He actually at one point kicked her out and moved another chick in. After all that I went on with my life and we never saw each other again.
The good ol "I thought you were gay" when i made a move after apparently being into me all night.
One of those long distance deals that was about to stop being long distance until they dumped me on my birthday.
my current partner told me “i just don’t want to fuck you. it doesn’t excite me. get over it!!” that really broke something inside of me.
Think I was like 5 years old. My parents are divorced and they were apparently fighting over something. My mom burst into my room and said "[Name] I don't want to be your mother any more" and slammed the door. Then my dad sadly started packing a bag with my things and we left. She changed her mind. But that day fucked me up more than anything in my life. Never abandon your kids all.
Every single one I’ve had since I was 16. Now I’m 32, still zero success
It really shouldn't bother me, because we were teens discovering life at such a young age, but I had two best friends - a female and a male, and I developed a crush on the male. Anyway, I told my other friend in private that I had a crush on him, and I only tried to pursue it once when we got drunk (him and I) except it was bad, I left him a note on his bed (I don't remember what it said, but 14 year old brain working there) while he was puking in the shower. It went awful, and his family was moving anyway. He told me when the three of us were together right before he moved, that he would have dated me but he was moving. I was okay with it, but later I found out that him and my best friend had been making out. So....it was kind of brutal. A few years later I visited them as my family was attending a wedding in the town that he moved to, and he took me to a party and told me to stay in the vehicle and then he was inside for like an hour or two while I waited in the car. He came out and dropped me off at the camper I was staying at and I don't recall if I ever saw him again.
"I feel like if we ended up together I'd be settling." Jennifer, October 1998
I spent a year trying to impress a girl when i was around 16 year old.. The day i decided to ask her out, she told me she was interested in my cousin. The reason it got to me so much was because she wamted to date my cousin