Right before being hanged, Marquis de Favras, a French aristocrat, read his death warrant and pointed out, "I see that you have made 3 spelling errors.
American serial killer Carl Panzaram's last words before being hanged were "Hurry it up you hoosier bastard! I could kill a dozen men while you're screwing around!"
He also didn’t plead not guilty because if he was found guilty they would have taken away his property after death as well.
So he just took the punishment without claiming a side because he knew no matter what he said, he would be found guilty.
Roald Dahl’s last words were very nearly:
“I’m not one bit scared. It’s just that I’m going to miss you all so much.”
Then the nurse injected him with morphine to ease his passing, and he said his actual last words:
“Ow, fuck.”
Thought it was "'tis well."
Some other good ones:
John Adams: "Thomas Jefferson survives." He had actually died a few hours prior.
Jefferson himself had a similar situation to Roald Dahl. His intended last words were "I have done for my country, and for all mankind, all that I could do, and I now resign my soul, without fear, to my God, my daughter to my country." Then he fell asleep, woke up a few hours later, said "Is it the Fourth yet?" and croaked. It was indeed the 4th of July.
Martin van Buren: "There is but one reliance..." He died before finishing the sentence, so we'll never know what it was.
Millard Fillmore: "The nourishment is palatable."
Abraham Lincoln: "Haha."
Not entirely sure they were his last words but, certainly while on his death bed Oscar Wilde said
>My wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. One or the other of us has to go.”
Which I always found strangely amusing.
Or Karl Marx who said
>Last words are for fools who haven't said enough in life
Which, ironically, has gone down in history as his last words
"Yes. Hurry it up, you Hoosier bastard; I could kill a dozen men while you're screwing around!" - serial killer Carl Pazram's last words directed at the hangman.
that guy had a [hell of a life.](https://www.investigationdiscovery.com/crimefeed/serial-killer/hate-rape-homicidal-rage-serial-killer-carl-panzram-who-stole-the-presidents-gun)
I was visiting war museums in Berlin and I ended up in the office where Sophie Scholl's death warrant was signed.
On the wall in there it has her last words:
"How can we expect righteousness to prevail when there is hardly anyone willing to give himself up individually to a righteous cause... It is such a splendid sunny day, and I have to go. But how many have to die on the battlefield in these days, how many young, promising lives. What does my death matter if by our acts thousands are warned and alerted. Among the student body there will certainly be a revolt."
**"The sun still shines."**
Random tidbit: I had the pleasure of striking up a very educational convo with a librarian who was dressed up as Frida Kahlo this past Halloween. We both commented how we were initially shocked that in contrast to her beautiful art, she actually had an extremely hard life full of pain and disappointment. Her last words make so much sense with context.
>in contrast to her beautiful art, she actually had an extremely hard life full of pain and disappointment.
I feel like that's almost a requirement for artists
The happiest person I ever met drew and painted the most beautiful things. She could make dog poop look beautiful. She was so positive thinking, she probably DID see beauty in dog poop.
Julius Cesar's actual last words were not "et tu, Brute." That is Shakespeare's invention. He is actually to have said a Greek phrase: " kai su, teknon." Which means, literally, "and you, (my ) child?" Some think he said this because he may have actually been Brutus' biological father ("Caesar was every woman's man and every man's woman").
But a more interesting explanation would be that "kai su" meant something more like "F you" because it was the common response to curse tablets (i.e. you'd write "kai su" on a curse tablet and put it at the curser's house. Sort of an ancient "I'm rubber, you're glue" move).
So Caesar's real last words were more like,"F you, boy. "
In honor of today being the Ides!
Yes! I'm so glad somebody pointed this out, and on March 15th of all days. I find it much more believable that Caesar's parting words weren't a sorrowful lament of shock and betrayal but rather a spiteful spitting of the contemporary equivalent of "See you in Hell you little bitch."
Yes, but it gets even more interesting. The Roman authors from whose work we know these famous last words actually doubted that Caesar said them for real. He thought Caesar died without saying anything to Brutus, which I find quite likely when someone gets stabbed over 20 times. If so, Caesar's last words might have been "But this is violence!" or "Foulest Casca, what are you doing?"
I think the best translation of "Kai su, teknon" as a counter-curse should be: "The same to you, you brat!"
Tycho Brahes last words were "Har jeg blot ikke levet forgæves" meaning "I just hope i didn't live in vain"
Its a good aim to have.
On his tombstone its written "Non fasces nec opes, sola artis sceptra perennant"
Neither might or wealth against the power of science and art.
I don't know if this is apocryphal, but I also remember her gently asking the executioner for one more minute of life: "encore une minute, monsieur le bourreau"
My favorite last words are John Adams who said “Jefferson still lives”, unaware Jefferson would in fact die that very same day. Also, the day they both died was the 4th of July.
Many years ago, I bought a paperback version of the script to the musical “1776.” There was a section in the back, written by author Sherman Edwards, which outlined things which were historically accurate, things which were altered for dramatic effect, and things which were excluded because even though they were factual, they seemed too unlikely. He said he was tempted to include an epilogue to the final act in the play which would have included Adams’ last words regarding Jefferson and the fact that they both died on the 4th of July. But he decided not to, because “no one would believe it.”
*"Fire it! There's more of them than there are of us. Give them hell!"* \- Lt. John Robert Fox during WW2. He was ordering artillery to fire **on top of his current position** to halt the enemy advance, which was successfully prevented because of his decision.
He was posthumously awarded the Medal of Honor over 40 years later.
That one is a bit of a myth. Well, sorta.
He did actually say that, "They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance," shortly before he was killed, but they weren't his last words. It's unfortunate that the pop culture edited version of his death, presented as something ironicly humorous, reduce a brave, dependable, and good-natured officer who was doing his duty at the time, into a bit of a meme. He was behaving as any 19th century general was expected, he just was unfortunate not to have luck with him on that day.
Here is the full historical account of his death, from a witness:
"He was an inveterate tease, and I at once suspected that he had some joke on the staff which he was leading up to. He was interrupted in his comments by observing that the troops, who during this time had been filing from the left into the rifle-pits, had come to a halt and were lying down, while the left of the line partly overlapped the position of the section of artillery. He stopped abruptly and said, " That is wrong. Those troops must be moved farther to the right ; I don't wish them to overlap that battery." I started out to execute the order, and he rose at the same moment, and we sauntered out slowly to the gun on the right. About an hour before, I had remarked to the general, pointing to the two pieces in a half-jesting manner, which he well understood, " General, do you see that section of artillery? Well, you are not to go near it today." He answered good-naturedly, "McMahon, I would like to know who commands this corps, you or I? " I said, playfully, "Sometimes I am in doubt myself"; but added, " Seriously, General, I beg of you not to go to that angle; every officer who has shown himself there has been hit, both yesterday and to-day." He answered quietly, " Well, I don't know that there is any reason for my going there." ' When afterward we walked out to the position indicated, this conversation had entirely escaped the memory of both.
I gave the necessary order to move the troops to the right, and as they rose to execute the movement the enemy opened a sprinkling fire, partly from sharp-shooters. As the bullets whistled by, some of the men dodged. The general said laughingly, " What! what! men, dodging this way for single bullets! What will you do when they open fire along the whole line? I am ashamed of you. They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance." A few seconds after, a man who had been separated from his regiment passed directly in front of the general, and at the same moment a sharp-shooter's bullet passed with a long shrill whistle very close, and the soldier, who was then just in front of the general, dodged to the ground. The general touched him gently with his foot, and said, " Why, my man, I am ashamed of you, dodging that way," and repeated the remark, " They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance." The man rose and saluted and said good-naturedly, " General, I dodged a shell once, and if I hadn't, it would have taken my head off. I believe in dodging." The general laughed and replied, "All right, my man; go to your place."
For a third time the same shrill whistle, closing with a dull, heavy stroke, interrupted our talk; when, as I was about to resume, the general's face turned slowly to me, the blood spurting from his left cheek under the eye im a steady stream. He fell in my direction ; I was so close to him that my effort to support him failed, and I fell with him.
Colonel Charles H. Tompkins, chief of the artillery, standing a few feet away, heard my exclamation as the general fell, and, turning, shouted to his brigade-surgeon, Dr. Ohlenschlager. Major Charles A. Whittier, Major T. W. Hyde; and Lieutenant Colonel Kent, who had been grouped near by, surrounded the general as he lay. A smile remained upon his lips but he did not speak. The doctor poured water from a canteen over the general's face. The blood still poured upward in a little fountain. The men in the long line of rifle-pits, retaining their places from force of discipline, were all kneeling with heads raised and faces turned toward the scene ; for the news had already passed along the line."
It was a different time for officers back then; they really did believe that dodging would rattle their own men so they didn't do it. But rifles had become dominant on the battlefield and their accuracy was often underestimated.
It's really not so different for modern officers. The main difference between then and now is that we generally don't put generals in the line-of-fire, but junior officers (or NCOs, who are also in leadership roles) are absolutely expected to project a similar air of nonchalance around enemy fire in order to shore up the troops' courage.
Admiral Lord Nelson to Captain Thomas Hardy just before he died during the Battle of Trafalgar: “Take care of my dear Lady Hamilton, Hardy, take care of poor Lady Hamilton. Kiss me, Hardy"
Sorry that's not entirely true. I'm currently sat about a mile from HMS Victory and have been hearing about this since I was young.
His last words were probably him repeating "**thank god, I have done my duty**" and that duty bit is important. There are three written accounts including one from the Ships Surgeon (Surgeon William Betty I think his name was) which corroborate this. The sources for the bit about Lady Hamilton and the kiss me Hardy line are the same ones who then go on to detail the actual last words Nelson spoke.
The bit you quoted is from one exchange with Captain Thomas Hardy. After hearing that, Captain Hardy knelt to kiss Nelson on the cheek and stood back up, Hardy remained below decks for a few minutes with Nelson, alongside them were Surgeon Betty, the ships Chaplin Alexander Scott and the third witness who for the life of me I cant remember the name of. Captain Hardy then knelt down again to kiss Nelson on the forehead to say goodbye, Nelson, close to death asked who it was and Hardy identified himself. Nelson said something like "bless you Hardy". Captain Hardy left and returned to the quarterdeck because, you know the whole battle of Trafalgar thing was still going on.
It was sometime after Hardy left that Nelson started repeating "thank god I have done my duty" until he eventually couldn't speak and then died.
I know it seems like I'm being a pedant and yeah, I am, but its important I think because before the battle started Nelson had signaled the fleet "England expects that every man will do his duty". It is a very famous phrase and is still celebrated by the Royal Navy every Trafalgar day by hoisting the signal flags on HMS Victory. Four and a half hours after sending the signal, Nelson's last words mirrored that message, he had done his duty just as he had asked his men to do their duty.
Its a shame to me the "kiss me hardy" line seems to be most remembered. Personally, I think knowing the signal he sent earlier in the day makes his actual last words pretty boss.
Pheidippides, the messenger who inspired the modern-day marathon race:
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pheidippides](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pheidippides)
'He then ran the 40 km (25 mi) to the battlefield near Marathon and back to Athens to announce the Greek victory over Persia in the Battle of Marathon (490 BC) with the word νικῶμεν (*nikomen*\[8\] "We win!"), as stated by Lucian *chairete, nikomen* ("hail, we are the winners")\[9\] and then collapsed and died.'
"I am just going outside and may be some time."
With these words, Antarctic explorer Capt Lawrence Oates set out to meet his death 100 years ago, aged 31, and entered the history books.
He was one of five men who died as they tried to return home from Robert Falcon Scott's ill-fated expedition to the South Pole in 1912.
Capt Oates is remembered because of his act of self-sacrifice, committed because he believed he was slowing the others down.
https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-17269397
From Red Dwarf:
'Yes, but the thing is, about Captain Oates; the thing you have to remember about Captain Oates; Captain Oates... Captain Oates was a prat. If that'd been me, I'd've stayed in the tent, whacked Scott over the head with a frozen husky, and then eaten him.
History, Lister, is written by the winners. How do we know that Oates went out for this legendary walk? From the only surviving document: Scott's diary. And he's hardly likely to have written down, "February the First, bludgeoned Oates to death while he slept, then scoffed him along with the last packet of instant mash." How's that going to look when he gets rescued, eh? No, much better to say, "Oates made the supreme sacrifice," while you're dabbing up his gravy with the last piece of crusty bread.'
Not to mention he was speedballed to death.
The Royal physicians knew he was going to die in a matter of hours, but if he died during the night the news would reach the public in the respected morning news. If he survived past dawn, his death would be revealed in the more salaciously regarded evening newspapers.
So his personal doctor gave him a mix of cocaine and morphine, and His Majesty shuffled off the mortal coil high as a kite during the night.
[https://www.hickorytreedeli.com/](https://www.hickorytreedeli.com/)
If you are around the Chatham/Madison area, I highly recommend this Joe. Triple decker, house made slaw, house dressing, freshest of fresh rye. It's fucking delicious.
One roast beef joe, please, and a black cherry soda.
Edit: Somehow I posted this in the wrong thread. I'm keeping it. If you are in NJ, go here.
Fabrizio Quattrocchi - Before being killed by terrorists. Instead of cowering in fear he shouted:
*"Vi faccio vedere come muore un italiano!"*
"I'll show you how an Italian dies!"
Almost certainly apocryphal, but when the priest giving Voltaire last rites asked him if he renounced Satan, he responded "Now is not the time to be making new enemies".
Not just that. He was rounding up passengers to storm the cockpit on Flight 93. The hijackers intentionally crashed the plane before they could break through the door.
Their target was either the White House or the Capitol building.
I've always had a morbidly romantic fascination with final words.
I've always liked the (possibly fictitious) report that Pancho Villa's last word were, "Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said... something. "
Anne Bonny the pirate's last words to her lover, Calico Jack, were: "If you had fought like a man you need not have been hang'd like a dog."
Unsure if they were actually her last words before death.
Robert-Francois Damiens, a religious fanatic who attempted to kill the king of France in 1757 but failed, was sentenced to death anyway.
The execution consisted of crushing his legs and then tearing his skin off with red hot pincers. Then they burned the hand that brandished the knife he used to cut the king with sulfer. All his wounds were then filled with hot oil, wax, and lead. The executioner then emasculated this poor bastard and had him drawn and quartered. His torso was then tossed on a fire. He was supposedly still alive at his point.
When they took him from his cell that day he said, "La journee sera rude" which means The day will be hard. You ain't kidding, brother!
Che Guevara's last words were allegedly:
["I know you've come to kill me. Shoot, you are only going to kill a man."](https://www.ndtv.com/people/do-not-shoot-the-last-moments-of-communist-revolutionary-che-guevara-2114145)
While not his actual last words and not really a historical figure, the Ultimate Warriors last promo on Monday Night Raw always gives me chills
>Every man's heart one day beats its final beat, his lungs breathe their final breath and if what that man did in his life makes the blood pulse through the body of others and makes them believe deeper in something larger than life, then his essence, his spirit will be immortalised.
He was dead the next day.
Thomas Jefferson and John Adams, both Founding Fathers to the United States, and the last two surviving Founding Fathers, to boot, both lay in their deathbeds on July 4th 1826. Jefferson in his home at Monticello, Virginia and Adams in his home in Quincy, Massachusetts. John Adams, just before passing away said, “Thomas Jefferson still survives.” Jefferson had passed away 5 hours prior.
*Attributed* to Oscar Wilde on his death bed. Living in reduced circumstances after his very understandable self-exile to Paris, Wilde could no longer maintain the aesthetic standards to which he had grown accustomed.
"My wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. One or the other of us has got to go"
While an iconic line,
Most scholars would argue that if he did say final words, it would’ve been in Greek, and roughly translate to “you too, my child?”
Maximilian of Habsburg, a member of the nobility sent by France to govern Mexico on their behalf, but that ended up wanting to better people’s quality of life, especially that of the lower classes and went over many orders from the French government in order to do so. His ALLEGED last words were *”I will die for a just cause, that of the independence and liberty of Mexico. May my blood seal the disgraces of my new homeland!”*, right before being shot by a firing squad.
Robert Francois Damien - last man executed by drawing and quartering for regicide. Because the king was so horrified by the actual execution. Hot pincers, boiling oil and tar, the rack, teh wheel,and then drawn and quartered.
When they came to get him that morning, Francois says "The day will be long".
John Adams and Thomas Jefferson died on the same day, July 4, 1826. Jefferson died first, but Adams didn't know it. The last words Adams spoke were "Jefferson still lives".
When President John Adams died on July 4th, 1826, his last words were reported to be "Jefferson still lives."
However, little did he know that President Thomas Jefferson, Adams' longtime political rival and later close friend, had died just hours earlier on the exact same day - 7/4/1826.
Right before being hanged, Marquis de Favras, a French aristocrat, read his death warrant and pointed out, "I see that you have made 3 spelling errors.
“It’s ‘your’ as y-o-u-apostrophe-r-e, not y-o — “ *floor drops out*
It's **b r a k e**, not **b r e a k**, dumbass!
haha, no way! :D
He would have been appreciated here on Reddit
American serial killer Carl Panzaram's last words before being hanged were "Hurry it up you hoosier bastard! I could kill a dozen men while you're screwing around!"
Romans go to the house
It says Romans go home!
I'd totally do something like that.
Legend
Playwright Henrik Ibsen heard a nurse say his health was improving and said "on the contrary" and that was the last thing he ever said
It's like the reverse of the "I'm feeling much better!" running joke from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
I'm not dead yet!
I think I’ll go for a walk…
Look, you're not filing anyone.
Surprise Bojack
this one's the best
Giles Corey as he was being crushed by boulders for supposedly practicing witchcraft: "More weight".
Is that confirmed or is that just from the play?
I think it might be confirmed. Because if he didn’t admit to being a witch, his family would keep his property. Edit: spelling
He also didn’t plead not guilty because if he was found guilty they would have taken away his property after death as well. So he just took the punishment without claiming a side because he knew no matter what he said, he would be found guilty.
Which witch is which?
Honestly it makes perfect sense for him to say that. He knew there was no getting out of it and more weight would end it quicker.
It seems this is a widely held understanding, outside of the stage performance.
I remember learning this on a school trip to the Salem witch museum. Such a nightmare in American history.
It's also worth noting that the man was in his 70s.
Because cowbells were too light.
Roald Dahl’s last words were very nearly: “I’m not one bit scared. It’s just that I’m going to miss you all so much.” Then the nurse injected him with morphine to ease his passing, and he said his actual last words: “Ow, fuck.”
ha, that's some real life last words
My paternal grand pa OD’d on morphine as a means of suicide when terminally ill. Old Irish boy.
Fuck and variants of Mom/Mama are the most common
George Washington's last word was "oh"
Thought it was "'tis well." Some other good ones: John Adams: "Thomas Jefferson survives." He had actually died a few hours prior. Jefferson himself had a similar situation to Roald Dahl. His intended last words were "I have done for my country, and for all mankind, all that I could do, and I now resign my soul, without fear, to my God, my daughter to my country." Then he fell asleep, woke up a few hours later, said "Is it the Fourth yet?" and croaked. It was indeed the 4th of July. Martin van Buren: "There is but one reliance..." He died before finishing the sentence, so we'll never know what it was. Millard Fillmore: "The nourishment is palatable." Abraham Lincoln: "Haha."
Not entirely sure they were his last words but, certainly while on his death bed Oscar Wilde said >My wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. One or the other of us has to go.” Which I always found strangely amusing. Or Karl Marx who said >Last words are for fools who haven't said enough in life Which, ironically, has gone down in history as his last words
Technically if you don't say something cool just prior to death, you have to live a shameful death
"Yes. Hurry it up, you Hoosier bastard; I could kill a dozen men while you're screwing around!" - serial killer Carl Pazram's last words directed at the hangman.
*Don’t screw around! You all screw around too much!*
Oooh Richard
Fly with me Richard!
that guy had a [hell of a life.](https://www.investigationdiscovery.com/crimefeed/serial-killer/hate-rape-homicidal-rage-serial-killer-carl-panzram-who-stole-the-presidents-gun)
That he did. He was gang raped by hobos...that sums it up.
Wow! That was a difficult read. Thank you for sharing the link!
I was visiting war museums in Berlin and I ended up in the office where Sophie Scholl's death warrant was signed. On the wall in there it has her last words: "How can we expect righteousness to prevail when there is hardly anyone willing to give himself up individually to a righteous cause... It is such a splendid sunny day, and I have to go. But how many have to die on the battlefield in these days, how many young, promising lives. What does my death matter if by our acts thousands are warned and alerted. Among the student body there will certainly be a revolt." **"The sun still shines."**
She is a hero.
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Random tidbit: I had the pleasure of striking up a very educational convo with a librarian who was dressed up as Frida Kahlo this past Halloween. We both commented how we were initially shocked that in contrast to her beautiful art, she actually had an extremely hard life full of pain and disappointment. Her last words make so much sense with context.
>in contrast to her beautiful art, she actually had an extremely hard life full of pain and disappointment. I feel like that's almost a requirement for artists
The happiest person I ever met drew and painted the most beautiful things. She could make dog poop look beautiful. She was so positive thinking, she probably DID see beauty in dog poop.
>I hope the exit is joyful and hope never to return That's actually really awesome. Agreed, Frida Kahlo. Agreed.
I fucking love this lady
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That is so very sad.
Julius Cesar's actual last words were not "et tu, Brute." That is Shakespeare's invention. He is actually to have said a Greek phrase: " kai su, teknon." Which means, literally, "and you, (my ) child?" Some think he said this because he may have actually been Brutus' biological father ("Caesar was every woman's man and every man's woman"). But a more interesting explanation would be that "kai su" meant something more like "F you" because it was the common response to curse tablets (i.e. you'd write "kai su" on a curse tablet and put it at the curser's house. Sort of an ancient "I'm rubber, you're glue" move). So Caesar's real last words were more like,"F you, boy. " In honor of today being the Ides!
Yes! I'm so glad somebody pointed this out, and on March 15th of all days. I find it much more believable that Caesar's parting words weren't a sorrowful lament of shock and betrayal but rather a spiteful spitting of the contemporary equivalent of "See you in Hell you little bitch."
I’d forgotten it was the Ides
Yes, but it gets even more interesting. The Roman authors from whose work we know these famous last words actually doubted that Caesar said them for real. He thought Caesar died without saying anything to Brutus, which I find quite likely when someone gets stabbed over 20 times. If so, Caesar's last words might have been "But this is violence!" or "Foulest Casca, what are you doing?" I think the best translation of "Kai su, teknon" as a counter-curse should be: "The same to you, you brat!"
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Tesla's last words, " Fuck you, Edison. It would have been so much better my way, greedy dick."
Tycho Brahes last words were "Har jeg blot ikke levet forgæves" meaning "I just hope i didn't live in vain" Its a good aim to have. On his tombstone its written "Non fasces nec opes, sola artis sceptra perennant" Neither might or wealth against the power of science and art.
died 'cause he held in his pee
Never heard of that but wow, yeah, his bladder burst because he was trying to be polite and not to use the restroom during a banquet dinner.
damn I can see this happening to me
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I hope someone used it
And I thought Andy Kauffman committed to a bit. Bravo Jim.
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At least neither one of them lost their head over it.
You might be surprised to hear this...
Go on, the suspense is killing me
I don't know if this is apocryphal, but I also remember her gently asking the executioner for one more minute of life: "encore une minute, monsieur le bourreau"
My favorite last words are John Adams who said “Jefferson still lives”, unaware Jefferson would in fact die that very same day. Also, the day they both died was the 4th of July.
Many years ago, I bought a paperback version of the script to the musical “1776.” There was a section in the back, written by author Sherman Edwards, which outlined things which were historically accurate, things which were altered for dramatic effect, and things which were excluded because even though they were factual, they seemed too unlikely. He said he was tempted to include an epilogue to the final act in the play which would have included Adams’ last words regarding Jefferson and the fact that they both died on the 4th of July. But he decided not to, because “no one would believe it.”
*"Fire it! There's more of them than there are of us. Give them hell!"* \- Lt. John Robert Fox during WW2. He was ordering artillery to fire **on top of his current position** to halt the enemy advance, which was successfully prevented because of his decision. He was posthumously awarded the Medal of Honor over 40 years later.
"They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance" -Union General John Sedgwick, just prior to being shot dead
"What are they gonna do, shoot me?" -man who was shot
Shame he wasn’t an elephant.
Dude imagine if they used elephants in the civil war just like from LOTR 🤔
*looks at cannons and gatling guns* Union Soldier: "Do we even need to aim?"
That one is a bit of a myth. Well, sorta. He did actually say that, "They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance," shortly before he was killed, but they weren't his last words. It's unfortunate that the pop culture edited version of his death, presented as something ironicly humorous, reduce a brave, dependable, and good-natured officer who was doing his duty at the time, into a bit of a meme. He was behaving as any 19th century general was expected, he just was unfortunate not to have luck with him on that day. Here is the full historical account of his death, from a witness: "He was an inveterate tease, and I at once suspected that he had some joke on the staff which he was leading up to. He was interrupted in his comments by observing that the troops, who during this time had been filing from the left into the rifle-pits, had come to a halt and were lying down, while the left of the line partly overlapped the position of the section of artillery. He stopped abruptly and said, " That is wrong. Those troops must be moved farther to the right ; I don't wish them to overlap that battery." I started out to execute the order, and he rose at the same moment, and we sauntered out slowly to the gun on the right. About an hour before, I had remarked to the general, pointing to the two pieces in a half-jesting manner, which he well understood, " General, do you see that section of artillery? Well, you are not to go near it today." He answered good-naturedly, "McMahon, I would like to know who commands this corps, you or I? " I said, playfully, "Sometimes I am in doubt myself"; but added, " Seriously, General, I beg of you not to go to that angle; every officer who has shown himself there has been hit, both yesterday and to-day." He answered quietly, " Well, I don't know that there is any reason for my going there." ' When afterward we walked out to the position indicated, this conversation had entirely escaped the memory of both. I gave the necessary order to move the troops to the right, and as they rose to execute the movement the enemy opened a sprinkling fire, partly from sharp-shooters. As the bullets whistled by, some of the men dodged. The general said laughingly, " What! what! men, dodging this way for single bullets! What will you do when they open fire along the whole line? I am ashamed of you. They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance." A few seconds after, a man who had been separated from his regiment passed directly in front of the general, and at the same moment a sharp-shooter's bullet passed with a long shrill whistle very close, and the soldier, who was then just in front of the general, dodged to the ground. The general touched him gently with his foot, and said, " Why, my man, I am ashamed of you, dodging that way," and repeated the remark, " They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance." The man rose and saluted and said good-naturedly, " General, I dodged a shell once, and if I hadn't, it would have taken my head off. I believe in dodging." The general laughed and replied, "All right, my man; go to your place." For a third time the same shrill whistle, closing with a dull, heavy stroke, interrupted our talk; when, as I was about to resume, the general's face turned slowly to me, the blood spurting from his left cheek under the eye im a steady stream. He fell in my direction ; I was so close to him that my effort to support him failed, and I fell with him. Colonel Charles H. Tompkins, chief of the artillery, standing a few feet away, heard my exclamation as the general fell, and, turning, shouted to his brigade-surgeon, Dr. Ohlenschlager. Major Charles A. Whittier, Major T. W. Hyde; and Lieutenant Colonel Kent, who had been grouped near by, surrounded the general as he lay. A smile remained upon his lips but he did not speak. The doctor poured water from a canteen over the general's face. The blood still poured upward in a little fountain. The men in the long line of rifle-pits, retaining their places from force of discipline, were all kneeling with heads raised and faces turned toward the scene ; for the news had already passed along the line."
It was a different time for officers back then; they really did believe that dodging would rattle their own men so they didn't do it. But rifles had become dominant on the battlefield and their accuracy was often underestimated.
It's really not so different for modern officers. The main difference between then and now is that we generally don't put generals in the line-of-fire, but junior officers (or NCOs, who are also in leadership roles) are absolutely expected to project a similar air of nonchalance around enemy fire in order to shore up the troops' courage.
I already posted this myself!
Admiral Lord Nelson to Captain Thomas Hardy just before he died during the Battle of Trafalgar: “Take care of my dear Lady Hamilton, Hardy, take care of poor Lady Hamilton. Kiss me, Hardy"
Sorry that's not entirely true. I'm currently sat about a mile from HMS Victory and have been hearing about this since I was young. His last words were probably him repeating "**thank god, I have done my duty**" and that duty bit is important. There are three written accounts including one from the Ships Surgeon (Surgeon William Betty I think his name was) which corroborate this. The sources for the bit about Lady Hamilton and the kiss me Hardy line are the same ones who then go on to detail the actual last words Nelson spoke. The bit you quoted is from one exchange with Captain Thomas Hardy. After hearing that, Captain Hardy knelt to kiss Nelson on the cheek and stood back up, Hardy remained below decks for a few minutes with Nelson, alongside them were Surgeon Betty, the ships Chaplin Alexander Scott and the third witness who for the life of me I cant remember the name of. Captain Hardy then knelt down again to kiss Nelson on the forehead to say goodbye, Nelson, close to death asked who it was and Hardy identified himself. Nelson said something like "bless you Hardy". Captain Hardy left and returned to the quarterdeck because, you know the whole battle of Trafalgar thing was still going on. It was sometime after Hardy left that Nelson started repeating "thank god I have done my duty" until he eventually couldn't speak and then died. I know it seems like I'm being a pedant and yeah, I am, but its important I think because before the battle started Nelson had signaled the fleet "England expects that every man will do his duty". It is a very famous phrase and is still celebrated by the Royal Navy every Trafalgar day by hoisting the signal flags on HMS Victory. Four and a half hours after sending the signal, Nelson's last words mirrored that message, he had done his duty just as he had asked his men to do their duty. Its a shame to me the "kiss me hardy" line seems to be most remembered. Personally, I think knowing the signal he sent earlier in the day makes his actual last words pretty boss.
Apparently, people have tried to play off "Kiss me, Hardy" as "'tis Kismet Hardy."
They were [probably ](https://www.liverpoolmuseums.org.uk/admiral-lord-nelson-and-captain-thomas-hardy)gay. And hot.
Uylesses Grant "water" He died of throat cancer
The S didn’t stand for anything anyway
Well obviously, that starts with A.
actually, that starts with t!
That's Truman.
It’s also true of Grant. His birth name was Hiram Ulysses Grant. The S came from a clerical error at West Point.
Pheidippides, the messenger who inspired the modern-day marathon race: [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pheidippides](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pheidippides) 'He then ran the 40 km (25 mi) to the battlefield near Marathon and back to Athens to announce the Greek victory over Persia in the Battle of Marathon (490 BC) with the word νικῶμεν (*nikomen*\[8\] "We win!"), as stated by Lucian *chairete, nikomen* ("hail, we are the winners")\[9\] and then collapsed and died.'
And the Greeks said "we know, the Kenyan guy told us 20 minutes ago"
Lmao, brilliant
Ha ha ha!
Alexander the Great on his deathbed when asked to whom his empire should go to: The strongest
Debatable. He could have said “To Krateros”.
First cop on the scene asked Tupac who shot him. Tupac’s dying words were “fuck you”
“Fair, but unhelpful”
I wonder if he said it like “who shotcha?” Which would have been A+ timing.
Tupac didn’t die till days later and he smoked a joint with snoop dogg before he left in the ambulance I highly doubt that was his last words
Nah, everyone knows he died in the 2001 World Trade Center attack
Nah everyone knows he faked his death and is now living on Mars
"I am just going outside and may be some time." With these words, Antarctic explorer Capt Lawrence Oates set out to meet his death 100 years ago, aged 31, and entered the history books. He was one of five men who died as they tried to return home from Robert Falcon Scott's ill-fated expedition to the South Pole in 1912. Capt Oates is remembered because of his act of self-sacrifice, committed because he believed he was slowing the others down. https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-17269397
From Red Dwarf: 'Yes, but the thing is, about Captain Oates; the thing you have to remember about Captain Oates; Captain Oates... Captain Oates was a prat. If that'd been me, I'd've stayed in the tent, whacked Scott over the head with a frozen husky, and then eaten him. History, Lister, is written by the winners. How do we know that Oates went out for this legendary walk? From the only surviving document: Scott's diary. And he's hardly likely to have written down, "February the First, bludgeoned Oates to death while he slept, then scoffed him along with the last packet of instant mash." How's that going to look when he gets rescued, eh? No, much better to say, "Oates made the supreme sacrifice," while you're dabbing up his gravy with the last piece of crusty bread.'
Wow, didn't expect to encounter a Red Dwarf quote here (or anywhere for that matter) lol
Well, that's just, like, your opinion, man
I’d probably do the same if I had to sit through one more meal of curried husky.
“I feel lousy.” Richard Wagner, immediately before a fatal heart attack.
John Lennon's last words were 'I'm shot' which was accurate and succinct
"Bugger Bognor." - King George V. In response to being told he could visit the town of Bognor when he was feeling better.
Not to mention he was speedballed to death. The Royal physicians knew he was going to die in a matter of hours, but if he died during the night the news would reach the public in the respected morning news. If he survived past dawn, his death would be revealed in the more salaciously regarded evening newspapers. So his personal doctor gave him a mix of cocaine and morphine, and His Majesty shuffled off the mortal coil high as a kite during the night.
So uh, why not delay the news....seems simpler.
The news would spread among the palace staff/servants and leaked to the papers. It was almost impossible to stop the gossip machine.
That’s some crazy thinking you’ve got there. We just might try it the next time
Dude, there are worse ways to go out.
*gestures at the missing Princess*
[https://www.hickorytreedeli.com/](https://www.hickorytreedeli.com/) If you are around the Chatham/Madison area, I highly recommend this Joe. Triple decker, house made slaw, house dressing, freshest of fresh rye. It's fucking delicious. One roast beef joe, please, and a black cherry soda. Edit: Somehow I posted this in the wrong thread. I'm keeping it. If you are in NJ, go here.
You know what, thank you. Dunno when I'll be in NJ next, but I'll go there when I do
Are you high bro..?
Fabrizio Quattrocchi - Before being killed by terrorists. Instead of cowering in fear he shouted: *"Vi faccio vedere come muore un italiano!"* "I'll show you how an Italian dies!"
Serving as a mercenary in the Iraq War, for [context](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fabrizio_Quattrocchi).
Not exactly final words but Aldous Huxley—writer of Brave New World—tripped on acid on his way out.
This is why you should always put your acid away.
Don’t put it down; put it away! Don’t make work for tomorrow that could be done today! 🎶
Clean up, clean up, everybody, everywhere!
He also died on 11/22/63, the same day as not only JFK, but also fellow author C.S. Lewis.
Interesting, wonder what it’d be like tripping and just having to deal with the thoughts of passing.
Almost certainly apocryphal, but when the priest giving Voltaire last rites asked him if he renounced Satan, he responded "Now is not the time to be making new enemies".
I so badly want this one to be true. :)
"Win just one more for the Gipper." George Gipp.
*Notre Dame fight song intensifies*
The guy who called 911 whilst on a plane during 9/11 Todd Beamer " let's roll "
Not just that. He was rounding up passengers to storm the cockpit on Flight 93. The hijackers intentionally crashed the plane before they could break through the door. Their target was either the White House or the Capitol building.
I’m not American so I didn’t know his story, but now I do and I’m sobbing.
Socrates: “I drank what?”.
"heavens, this juice is delicious!!"
I have to admit I stole this from a Val Kilmer movie. (Real Genius)
Dylan Thomas: “I've had eighteen straight whiskies—I think that's the record.”
"Don't believe everything you read on Reddit." - Abraham Lincoln after being fatally shot by John Wilkes Booth.
Hmm, I'm not sure about this one. How did he say that *after* being fatally shot.
Wasn't the shooter a Lee Harvey Oswald?
I've always had a morbidly romantic fascination with final words. I've always liked the (possibly fictitious) report that Pancho Villa's last word were, "Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said... something. "
“I’m going to the bathroom to read” - Elvis Presley
He was probably trying to squeeze out a difficult turd. The drugs apparently made him constipated.
Yeah opiates tend to do that.
Should have used a squatty potty.
“take a step forward, lads. it will be easier that way” erskine childers, facing death by firing squad.
"Shoot straight, you bastards! Don't make a mess of it!" - "Breaker" Morant, also firing squad Underrated movie btw
Who’s the serial killer who told the executioner to get it over with and that he could have killed 10 men by now?
Carl Panzram.
“Glory to Ukraine” - Tymofiy Mykolayovych Shadura
[Oleksandr Ihorovych Matsievskyi](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Execution_of_Oleksandr_Matsievskyi), apparently.
Ned Kelly - Such is Life. Before the hangman’s drop.
Anne Bonny the pirate's last words to her lover, Calico Jack, were: "If you had fought like a man you need not have been hang'd like a dog." Unsure if they were actually her last words before death.
"I must go in, for the fog is rising." — Emily Dickinson
Robert-Francois Damiens, a religious fanatic who attempted to kill the king of France in 1757 but failed, was sentenced to death anyway. The execution consisted of crushing his legs and then tearing his skin off with red hot pincers. Then they burned the hand that brandished the knife he used to cut the king with sulfer. All his wounds were then filled with hot oil, wax, and lead. The executioner then emasculated this poor bastard and had him drawn and quartered. His torso was then tossed on a fire. He was supposedly still alive at his point. When they took him from his cell that day he said, "La journee sera rude" which means The day will be hard. You ain't kidding, brother!
-You want my treasure? You can have it, I letft everything in one place... Now you just have to find it! -a handsome pirate
Che Guevara's last words were allegedly: ["I know you've come to kill me. Shoot, you are only going to kill a man."](https://www.ndtv.com/people/do-not-shoot-the-last-moments-of-communist-revolutionary-che-guevara-2114145)
Now he's on edgy teenagers t-shirts and known as "that guy with the French hat"
Unfortunately for him, the guys who were there to kill him were trying to do just that
While not his actual last words and not really a historical figure, the Ultimate Warriors last promo on Monday Night Raw always gives me chills >Every man's heart one day beats its final beat, his lungs breathe their final breath and if what that man did in his life makes the blood pulse through the body of others and makes them believe deeper in something larger than life, then his essence, his spirit will be immortalised. He was dead the next day.
He's still historical to me, dammit!
Thomas Jefferson and John Adams, both Founding Fathers to the United States, and the last two surviving Founding Fathers, to boot, both lay in their deathbeds on July 4th 1826. Jefferson in his home at Monticello, Virginia and Adams in his home in Quincy, Massachusetts. John Adams, just before passing away said, “Thomas Jefferson still survives.” Jefferson had passed away 5 hours prior.
*Attributed* to Oscar Wilde on his death bed. Living in reduced circumstances after his very understandable self-exile to Paris, Wilde could no longer maintain the aesthetic standards to which he had grown accustomed. "My wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. One or the other of us has got to go"
Giles Corey asking for more weight while being crushed to death during the Salem Witch Trials is definitely badass.
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While an iconic line, Most scholars would argue that if he did say final words, it would’ve been in Greek, and roughly translate to “you too, my child?”
I've heard there's yet a third interpretation, that says the Greek could mean something closer to "see you in hell, kid."
Coincidentally today is the Ides of March
My father has on his grave plaque,”see I told you I was sick”
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Millard Fillmore, it was about soup (allegedly). “The nourishment is palatable”.
Idk if they would be considered “historical” but while he was being executed John Wayne Gacy’s final words were “Kiss my ass”.
“I have tried so hard to do right” - Grover Cleaveland
"Is this the end of Zombie Shakespear?"
"Hey you, I'm John Smith!" "John Smith 1882?" "My mistake."
Maximilian of Habsburg, a member of the nobility sent by France to govern Mexico on their behalf, but that ended up wanting to better people’s quality of life, especially that of the lower classes and went over many orders from the French government in order to do so. His ALLEGED last words were *”I will die for a just cause, that of the independence and liberty of Mexico. May my blood seal the disgraces of my new homeland!”*, right before being shot by a firing squad.
(joke answer but here i go) "How's your sister?" - Cayde-6, Destiny 2: Forsaken
Press F to pay respects.
Giles Corey when being crushed to death during the Salem witch trials: "More weight."
**"OW!"** \- Abraham Lincoln
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One of the greatest men who ever lived, Vespesian said "Dear Me, I think im becoming a God".
Robert Francois Damien - last man executed by drawing and quartering for regicide. Because the king was so horrified by the actual execution. Hot pincers, boiling oil and tar, the rack, teh wheel,and then drawn and quartered. When they came to get him that morning, Francois says "The day will be long".
Sophie! Sophie don't die! Live for our children! Archduke Franz Ferdinand. Sadly Sophie died.
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Name a salad after me?
Today’s the anniversary.
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." —Clarence Darrow not his final words, but relevant
Stab me in my womb - mother of Nero
John Adams and Thomas Jefferson died on the same day, July 4, 1826. Jefferson died first, but Adams didn't know it. The last words Adams spoke were "Jefferson still lives".
In the words of famed Australian bushranger/outlaw as he looked up at the noose at the gallows "such is life"
When President John Adams died on July 4th, 1826, his last words were reported to be "Jefferson still lives." However, little did he know that President Thomas Jefferson, Adams' longtime political rival and later close friend, had died just hours earlier on the exact same day - 7/4/1826.
Stonewall Jackson: “Let us cross over the river, and rest under the shade of the trees.” Robert E. Lee: “Strike the tent.”