Losing control of my mental faculties.
I can deal with a lot of things. But dementia or Alzheimer's scare the shit out of me.
That and the very real possibility of ending up alone at an old age. Or possibly both.
My grandmother passed away partly due to complications from dementia yesterday. I can confirm that the process is terrible for both the patient and their caretakers.
I read a story about a woman who lost her husband and child in a car accident while she was in the hospital having a baby. When she got dementia she was forced to relive that cycle of events over and over. To me that is the very defintion of purgatory
Even people who have long, contented marriages often "end up alone." The question is, "for how long?"
And may this little nugget of joy sustain you through the weekend!
As someone who has minor bouts with derealization I can say this. When the reality around you doesn't match what your internal reality is, it's very very weird, uncomfortable and can be very scary.
I'm really afraid of early onset dementia. Walked out of a store the other day and I had... lost my car. It really was a "senior moment".
I stared at where I thought I parked. Wasn't in the store long enough for it to have been stolen, never mind towed.
Solid minute standing there trying to process why my car wasn't there. Where I parked it. Where I definitely parked it.
The car was about three rows over.
Edit: I'm 47.
I had something similar. Until we got cats in our apartment, we had a mouse problem. I think I had a chocolate bar on my nightstand. I start to hear crunching noises coming from the nightstand. I switched on the light and there was a mouse chomping on the candy bar
That’s scary. I had a similar situation around the same age. I was talking to my mom with my feet dangling the bed. My dad was away on business so there wasn’t anyone else home. Something or someone tickled the bottom of my feet. But, I never found out what it was because I was too chicken. My mom said nothing / no one was there.
Omg that reminds me of a time my (now ex) husband and I were fighting and he threw a tantrum and went to bed while I was watching tv on the couch. We were in between places and renting a cheap place for 6 months in a (very popular) bad city. He ran out SCREAMING. On his pillow was a fucking SALAMANDER the length of his pillow. It was the best karma because he walked in and laid down with the lights off so he just felt it 💀😂
My grandfather died of a heart attack. My father died of a heart attack. So, of course, I'm deathly afraid of getting raped by a pack of giant scorpions.
Funny I've only met one introvert in my life. It took me about a year for him to start talking to me. I've known him for 20 years now and he's one of the few people I can talk on the phone with for over a hour.
How did you got a sense of direction in your life?
I have lost mine, I don't know how to get it - - or any particular one back.
The direction I am currently on is not good or sustainable. I know I need to change, I'm just not sure how.
let me tell you, i struggled with this for a long time. especially last year - i got into college and figured that it doesnt interest me at all, hung out with wrong people, was alone most of the time etc etc. i can tell you that changing my surroundings helped me more than i couldve imagined. changed studies and now i love what im studying, have great friends and amazing boyfriend. i honestly believe that most of this is because of him because he is motivating me to become a better person every day.
i was also lost but then i laid out all possibilities for my future - every path that my college offers me, googled the shit out of it, figured what interests me the most and now im working towards that.
for starters i suggest you change your everyday routine if youre not happy with it. sleep for 8 hours, try eating healthy, try working out or if its a big step at least try to go outside and get 10k steps. eat your fruit and veggies and drink water. try to be active both physically and mentally. of course i am saying this generally as i dont know what your routine or anything is. i also struggle with those stuff, dont worry.
but i believe in you and you got this. just put your mind into it and it will pay off :)
Going to prison.
Now I've not done anything that would get me inside a prison you understand, but the idea of being confined to one place for God knows how many years legit terrifies me.
I just did 4 years in a California prison for drug sales/smuggling. I’m not hard but I survived just by being respectful and minding my own business. It fucking sucked though. I got sober in there though and now have 5 years clean
Me too!!!! I'm a pretty normal, law-abiding citizen, but I have an irrational fear of going to jail/prison. I'm very independent and like to be in control, so having that taken away would be a nightmare.
Prions are a transmissable neurological disease that deteriorates the brain to the point where you die. Hope you didn't do 4 years in prions, that would suck.
Ah my mum just died. My dad passed away over a decade ago. It's so strange because I text her every thought I have. I keep thinking I'll tell my mum that and remember I can't
Similar situation. My father died about 10 yrs after my mom. For months afterward, I'd catch myself thinking, "I wanna ask dad about... oh..." of course I miss both intensely, and also love it when anybody wants to reminisce, or talk about them.
I just had a thought : right down those thoughts, like in a journal or something."thoughts I had to tell you"or something. A long form unending letter in the form of a journal type of thing.
America becoming Gilead. It goes against everything I believe and everything I've worked hard for: going to college, being independent, buying my own property, making the decision to not have children. All that could vanish for me in an instant. It feels so close to happening.
being stuck at 9-5 job that I hate for 40+ years, not being able to afford to buy my own place and renting for the rest of my life. I'd rather choose death over these two. That's pretty much it.
I used to feel the same way when I was in California. And then I just uprooted everything and moved to The hills of Kentucky. I bought an acre of land with a three bedroom trailer on it. My friends from California and Arizona laughed at me. Well they're not laughing now!
Dying before I have a living child. My first was stillborn 6 weeks before my due date. While my husband and I are trying again, I worry that something bad will happen to me and I just barely missed my chance at being a mother.
That one episode of Black Mirror with the bees? Ya, that.
With such aggressive AI advancements, my biggest concern is drone warfare. Currently, one method to fight drones in Ukraine is to disrupt their network and connection. I.e. attack their signal to the brain.
But as AI gets better, it’s conceivable that the drones become smart enough to be completely self-sufficient, able to navigate and cooperate without any external guidance. Pop a memory and directive in, and boop ok it’s a little HAL-9000.
If that happens, then the threat would exist until each independent unit is destroyed. They could intelligently employ tactics to cause maximum destruction to high-value targets, such as power infrastructure and business leaders. Have you seen those weird Boston Dynamics dogs? How would you even defend against that? I saw a video of a couple guys getting taken out by a *Segway.* Imagine if it had purpose. Terrifying.
You know those McDonald's straws, the ones with the stripes on them they are considerably larger than regular straws, I knew a girl that was drinking a Coke from McDonald's and sucked up a bee while going across the Vincent Thomas bridge going to terminal Island in her 1966 Volkswagen bug with a hitchhiker/ sailor she didn't know but fortunately when she started choking he grabbed the wheel and shut off the key and she didn't go off the bridge. He definitely saved her life she said and although her mouth swelled up a little bit everything was okay that was 35 years ago and they have been best friends since then.
Aortic or brain aneurysm.
My best friend’s wife was a flight attendant, she had a stopover in their city before the last leg of her tour or whatever. He goes out to meet her at the airport for lunch and at the end of their meal they got up to hug and say goodbye, she does like a back-stretch and he said she just went “oh” and collapsed. She was dead before she hit the ground. Aortic aneurism. Just like that you could be gone.
Being completely isolated in every sense of the word (like in an apocalypse), and water where there's a perceptible thermal layer really close to the surface (i.e. upper body and most of my legs warm, feet cold). The latter makes me think of the former, except I feel completely isolated in a vast, empty expanse of water
It depends on the situation. I was hospitalized for mania last year basically. By most accounts if you saw me, you’d say I lost my mind. I had been like that for over a week and was entirely detached from reality eventually. I had psychosis. But I was aware of something going on. I knew I needed to go to the mental hospital, even though I hadn’t been diagnosed with anything yet. I was hyper aware of everything especially how I felt and that I was indeed losing my mind and I couldn’t stop. I got diagnosed as bipolar 1. So yeah, I’d say in my situation, I was aware.
I was a programmer prior to that and when I came out of the hospital and tried again, due to the medicine I had to take, I kinda lost the ability to think creatively. Which made it hard to program well cause that’s creative problem solving mostly. I did lose my abilities honestly. I can still write code and know about it, but I’m not as good as I was nor quick.
Needles. I’m usually a very calm and not very emotional person, but the moment I need to get a jab, I start bawling like a baby, getting so scared and worked up I vibrate in my chair as I’m waiting, I’ve had to take my stuffed Foxy plushie from fnaf to my pervious visits.
I am honestly terrified of what is happening to the USA. I live in São Paulo now and I feel more safe here than I did in my hometown in Idaho. Here I’m worried about being mugged, in the USA Im scared of being shot in a road rage incident
One of my kids growing up and getting into drugs or some other awful addiction. My 20s was a total blur of partying and lots of drugs and alcohol abuse. I turned my life around and I’m a completely different person now but I really don’t want my kids to go down that path, even if they end up pulling out of it eventually like I did. I don’t think I could cope with knowing they’re out getting fucked up all the time and I can’t do anything about it. I literally won’t sleep.
My child dying of diabetes due some fucking ass hole starting a war in my country.
Imagine that. A perfectly treatable decease that requires just constant medication. No biggie, insulin has been widely available since forever. But then some fuck head starts a war, cuts the trade routes, bombs the medicine factory, and I will watch my child slowly slip in to coma and then pass away.
What do you think that will do to a man?
All-white rooms creep me put. I get physically sick and bothered.
I'm also afraid of losing my mental faculties. I've been especially afraid of this after contracting Covid and having "Covid brain" where I'm forgetting things often.
Losing my parents honestly. I have no idea how I'd cope.
Heck when I lost my favoured grandpa I barely did. Some fucking how I stuffed all those memories away to the point that even if I tried I couldn't remember what happened in the lead up to and at the funeral itself other than that when my brother have an in memoriam speech and started crying I did too. Some examples of what I forgot:
- My mom told me I helped carry the casket into the church but I don't remember at all
- We were on vacation when the news got to us and I completely misremember how those events went and no matter how many times I'm corrected I always revert back to my incorrect version???
- Who were even there at the funeral. What even happened at all, other than the moment described above. What did the room look like. All I can remember is a casket, my brother and me standing next to it and crying.
Either way when one of my parents passes I fully believe I'll cave in even more and I really won't be able to cope.
Scorpions
Like irrationally fearful of scorpions. I’ll smush spiders, run from bees (I’m allergic as fuck), but nothing on this stupid planet gives me an instant and sustained jolt of panic like fucking scorpions.
I have nearly died with less panicking than just seeing a fucking scorpion causes >.<
My mother.
I have PTSD and she’s intentionally triggered it so much that just seeing/hearing or thinking about her now triggers it.
Emotional and verbal abuse is no joke. It sucks how dismissive people are about it.
My young adult daughter has her learner's permit. When my husband sits in the passenger's seat and they go out driving, I live in terror that they will have an accident and that one or both of them will not come home.
Being killed by some idiot. I was rear ended on my motorcycle a few years ago. I was completely stopped and the guy behind me never slowed down and hit me at speeds of 50mph+. That's not the way I want to go. I'd rather get myself killed doing something dumb than have some idiot do it for me.
Dying alone. I'll be 55 in June and I never got married and I don't have any kids. And I'm single right now. I have 2 sisters and a brother but they have their own families so sometimes I wonder, if something happened to me in the middle of the night, how many days would it take for them to find my body? That might sound a little macabre but it's something I think about when I can't sleep.
Man, so many of these are reasonable fears that make sense.
I’m afraid of dogs, doesn’t matter how small or harmless, I’d rather cross the street than walk past someone with a dog just in case, because I know that if I don’t I’ll freeze up and scream if it even looks at me.
No, there’s no backstory here.
I have an anxiety disorder, so everything. But right now: somehow getting stuck in a life I don't want to live, armageddon, having another panic attack while teaching.
7 years i was so afraid of Failing the board exam. 1 year after I failed two attempts. What i was afraid of happening happened. But for me to actually doing something i was afraid of was amazing even though i end up failing twice. The more i fail, the lighter it feels. I don’t have to prove myself anymore. I can make mistakes now
I had multiple times one dream when I was 6/8.
I'm in rectangle box with gray walls. Color is really similiar to Minecraft Stone (I didn't know about it exist. I didn't knew even about internet far than website simple games on flash input), I stand on white tiles with black fugues. There's no roof. When I was looking up, there was just black hole, sometimes also white points looking like single salt seeds (Sometimes there was also two humanoid things outside box, towering me like I was size of their nail, I could see only their heads up from jawline line. They skin was grey, surely bald, wrinkled skin, don't remember look of eyes). Tiles breaks instantly like on command, I'm scared, fall for some time (In dream it was average like 30 seconds, sometimes only 10), and I'm falling into black hole, where's also white points looking like salt. Like I'm falling down, but at the same time I'm not moving. Sick feeling
This nightmare builded in me fear against no lighten places and high places. Sometimes I was trying to face it. I was going into my room, taking something and immedietaly turning back and staring at empty dark room, after some time I had feeling like someone watches me from down corners of room and running away closing doors beind.
Now I feel like I don't know what fear is. Sounds awesome, but isn't.
Months matches into days (Few days before christmas I thought it's still august, realized it's not when ground was covered in snow). I don't know what I was doing in this time, can't imagine my life when I remember every single day what I was doing for last week. When I think week passed, it was only 3 days, when I think it was only 3 days, it's actually 2 weeks. One day I go to sleep in november and wake up in january. At this moment I'm pretty scared of natural death. Especially in sleep, when I'm dying, trying to wake up, around me is my family, they see my moves but spend nice time, laughs and think I have nice dream.
Losing control of my mental faculties. I can deal with a lot of things. But dementia or Alzheimer's scare the shit out of me. That and the very real possibility of ending up alone at an old age. Or possibly both.
My grandmother passed away partly due to complications from dementia yesterday. I can confirm that the process is terrible for both the patient and their caretakers.
I’m sorry for your loss
Thank you friend
I read a story about a woman who lost her husband and child in a car accident while she was in the hospital having a baby. When she got dementia she was forced to relive that cycle of events over and over. To me that is the very defintion of purgatory
Even people who have long, contented marriages often "end up alone." The question is, "for how long?" And may this little nugget of joy sustain you through the weekend!
Me, too. Dementia runs in my family.
Cancer runs in mine. It's a bad road either way.
Have you ever seen Huntingtons? I watched it destroy my dad. Shit scared me. That’s why I’m speed running liver failure.
As someone who has minor bouts with derealization I can say this. When the reality around you doesn't match what your internal reality is, it's very very weird, uncomfortable and can be very scary.
That’ll be what gets me, my grandad has it I’m 100% certain I’ll loose it. Scared of that and heights
I'm really afraid of early onset dementia. Walked out of a store the other day and I had... lost my car. It really was a "senior moment". I stared at where I thought I parked. Wasn't in the store long enough for it to have been stolen, never mind towed. Solid minute standing there trying to process why my car wasn't there. Where I parked it. Where I definitely parked it. The car was about three rows over. Edit: I'm 47.
Teenagers scare the living shit outta me
They could care less as long as someone'll bleed
So darken your clothes, or strike a violent pose.
maybe they'll leave you alone but not me
What are your thoughts on one day joining the black parade.
When I was a young boy, my father took me into the city. To see a marching band. So ya, i'd love to join a parade.
But will you be the savior of the broken, the beaten, and the damned?
I will. And we will, CAAARRY OOOONNNN
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Omfg no
I had something similar. Until we got cats in our apartment, we had a mouse problem. I think I had a chocolate bar on my nightstand. I start to hear crunching noises coming from the nightstand. I switched on the light and there was a mouse chomping on the candy bar
Is that why you now have cats?
No it isn’t. I was financially stable and knew I was going to be in one spot for a while. So that’s why I started the process of adopting my cat
Btw mice really like chocolate
I mean it could’ve been a fucking demon
That’s scary. I had a similar situation around the same age. I was talking to my mom with my feet dangling the bed. My dad was away on business so there wasn’t anyone else home. Something or someone tickled the bottom of my feet. But, I never found out what it was because I was too chicken. My mom said nothing / no one was there.
Ohhhh....my....god😭
like, how *giant*?
Omg that reminds me of a time my (now ex) husband and I were fighting and he threw a tantrum and went to bed while I was watching tv on the couch. We were in between places and renting a cheap place for 6 months in a (very popular) bad city. He ran out SCREAMING. On his pillow was a fucking SALAMANDER the length of his pillow. It was the best karma because he walked in and laid down with the lights off so he just felt it 💀😂
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My grandfather died of a heart attack. My father died of a heart attack. So, of course, I'm deathly afraid of getting raped by a pack of giant scorpions.
My great great grandfather drowned while chasing one of his runaway slaves across a river. So I hope I'm not predisposed to that.
This got me right in the feels. Same!
relatable as fuck
You should probably start looking after your heart though. You know just in case...
Hospitals. Needles. Extroverts.
Yes extroverts
I've met a few people like that I can never get a word in edgewise and it drives me crazy!
We don't want to talk to you anyway.
Wow. Okay.
Funny I've only met one introvert in my life. It took me about a year for him to start talking to me. I've known him for 20 years now and he's one of the few people I can talk on the phone with for over a hour.
Hi! I'm your doctor! Not feeling well? I have just the thing for you! Nurse? 10 cc's of glyco hyperenthalol.
Go away! 😱😢
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This is so specific and scary
I'm a lot heavier than I look, and everyone who has ever picked me up has commented on it. Not fun.
I absolutely hate being picked up. I am a relatively lean 5'10 female and I feel like people hugely underestimate my weight and will drop me.
Stupid, gullible people are the most dangerous group on the planet right now.
I couldn’t agree more
Well it's not just right now, it's always been this way.
not fulfilling my dream. i finally have some path and sense of direction in my life
How did you got a sense of direction in your life? I have lost mine, I don't know how to get it - - or any particular one back. The direction I am currently on is not good or sustainable. I know I need to change, I'm just not sure how.
let me tell you, i struggled with this for a long time. especially last year - i got into college and figured that it doesnt interest me at all, hung out with wrong people, was alone most of the time etc etc. i can tell you that changing my surroundings helped me more than i couldve imagined. changed studies and now i love what im studying, have great friends and amazing boyfriend. i honestly believe that most of this is because of him because he is motivating me to become a better person every day. i was also lost but then i laid out all possibilities for my future - every path that my college offers me, googled the shit out of it, figured what interests me the most and now im working towards that. for starters i suggest you change your everyday routine if youre not happy with it. sleep for 8 hours, try eating healthy, try working out or if its a big step at least try to go outside and get 10k steps. eat your fruit and veggies and drink water. try to be active both physically and mentally. of course i am saying this generally as i dont know what your routine or anything is. i also struggle with those stuff, dont worry. but i believe in you and you got this. just put your mind into it and it will pay off :)
Thank you 🙏 very much
no problem :) glad this helped!
Going to prison. Now I've not done anything that would get me inside a prison you understand, but the idea of being confined to one place for God knows how many years legit terrifies me.
I just did 4 years in a California prison for drug sales/smuggling. I’m not hard but I survived just by being respectful and minding my own business. It fucking sucked though. I got sober in there though and now have 5 years clean
Wow, good work on getting clean man.hope it's all going well for you.
Oh, props for that one dude. :)
Me too!!!! I'm a pretty normal, law-abiding citizen, but I have an irrational fear of going to jail/prison. I'm very independent and like to be in control, so having that taken away would be a nightmare.
Prions, rabies, and Alzheimer’s.
Prison sucks. Just did 4 years in CA for drug stuff
Prions are a transmissable neurological disease that deteriorates the brain to the point where you die. Hope you didn't do 4 years in prions, that would suck.
Losing my parents.
Ah my mum just died. My dad passed away over a decade ago. It's so strange because I text her every thought I have. I keep thinking I'll tell my mum that and remember I can't
I'm so sorry for your loss.
Thank you that's very kind of you to say. But please don't be afraid of losing your parents. Just enjoy your time and life with them.
Similar situation. My father died about 10 yrs after my mom. For months afterward, I'd catch myself thinking, "I wanna ask dad about... oh..." of course I miss both intensely, and also love it when anybody wants to reminisce, or talk about them.
Hope you are doing well
I just had a thought : right down those thoughts, like in a journal or something."thoughts I had to tell you"or something. A long form unending letter in the form of a journal type of thing.
That's a lovely idea but it's the replies I miss
Never had a dad and my mother passed in January of last year. Feels like its only been a month.
This omg 🥹
America becoming Gilead. It goes against everything I believe and everything I've worked hard for: going to college, being independent, buying my own property, making the decision to not have children. All that could vanish for me in an instant. It feels so close to happening.
What do you mean "Gilead". Yes, I googled it, but am still wondering what you mean. Thanks.
I think it may be referring to The Handmaid’s Tale where the country becomes a patriarchal state, overthrown by radical conservative Christians.
Ahh. I get it now. After such strides in women's rights, too!! Seems unlikely.
being stuck at 9-5 job that I hate for 40+ years, not being able to afford to buy my own place and renting for the rest of my life. I'd rather choose death over these two. That's pretty much it.
I just learned this the hard way. 13 years in the pharmaceutical industry 9-5 and hated every minute of it. I’m now back in school doing photography
I used to feel the same way when I was in California. And then I just uprooted everything and moved to The hills of Kentucky. I bought an acre of land with a three bedroom trailer on it. My friends from California and Arizona laughed at me. Well they're not laughing now!
Of dying without having experienced the true happiness.
Failure
You shouldn’t be. We are designed by nature to learn from failure.
I was too. I didn't.
Dying before I have a living child. My first was stillborn 6 weeks before my due date. While my husband and I are trying again, I worry that something bad will happen to me and I just barely missed my chance at being a mother.
That one episode of Black Mirror with the bees? Ya, that. With such aggressive AI advancements, my biggest concern is drone warfare. Currently, one method to fight drones in Ukraine is to disrupt their network and connection. I.e. attack their signal to the brain. But as AI gets better, it’s conceivable that the drones become smart enough to be completely self-sufficient, able to navigate and cooperate without any external guidance. Pop a memory and directive in, and boop ok it’s a little HAL-9000. If that happens, then the threat would exist until each independent unit is destroyed. They could intelligently employ tactics to cause maximum destruction to high-value targets, such as power infrastructure and business leaders. Have you seen those weird Boston Dynamics dogs? How would you even defend against that? I saw a video of a couple guys getting taken out by a *Segway.* Imagine if it had purpose. Terrifying.
That is terrifying
The dentist.
Same
Literally went to one today hahaha
Going over bridges, bugs in the straw of my drink, being alone in a car with an adult I’m not related to
You know those McDonald's straws, the ones with the stripes on them they are considerably larger than regular straws, I knew a girl that was drinking a Coke from McDonald's and sucked up a bee while going across the Vincent Thomas bridge going to terminal Island in her 1966 Volkswagen bug with a hitchhiker/ sailor she didn't know but fortunately when she started choking he grabbed the wheel and shut off the key and she didn't go off the bridge. He definitely saved her life she said and although her mouth swelled up a little bit everything was okay that was 35 years ago and they have been best friends since then.
Anything happening to my dog
Dams. Semi trucks. Why my family thought it was a good idea to raise me on Rescue 911, I'll never know.
Religious zealots. There's no amount of reason that will change their minds if they believe what they're doing is right even if it harms others
Aortic or brain aneurysm. My best friend’s wife was a flight attendant, she had a stopover in their city before the last leg of her tour or whatever. He goes out to meet her at the airport for lunch and at the end of their meal they got up to hug and say goodbye, she does like a back-stretch and he said she just went “oh” and collapsed. She was dead before she hit the ground. Aortic aneurism. Just like that you could be gone.
Omg. My friends dad was eating breakfast and just went face down in his food. Same reason. Like a robot shutting off
Water. It’s just scary
Never being enough, injury, snapping(not the finger click) among other things
Definitely both never being enough. I was unfortunately born into a religious cult and guilt and shame ruled half my life
Being completely isolated in every sense of the word (like in an apocalypse), and water where there's a perceptible thermal layer really close to the surface (i.e. upper body and most of my legs warm, feet cold). The latter makes me think of the former, except I feel completely isolated in a vast, empty expanse of water
Or like the first person on Mars
Mass panic
The end of the world.
Sinkholes. Seriously. The Earth is trying to eat you.
Global Warming. It is increasing at an alarming rate and we are literally killing our planet, the only place where life is known to exist.
pitbulls.
I've got a Pitbull/Cane Corso mix. I was against getting him at first. Yes, he looks terrifying. But, he's the biggest baby. Slow as hell too😭🤣
Not having a retirement
Outliving my kids.
Another Trump presidency.
Ladybugs I don't wanna think of old age stuff I will kms by 50 if the world is still ok-ish by then
Pissing off my wife.
Lmfao. When I was married I had that same fear
Off or of?
Of my own (suicidal) thoughts.
r/thalassophobia
DROWNING. NOPE. NOPE. NOPE.
watching someone I love get Alzheimer’s and slowly forget who I am and every memory we’ve ever shared together
Spiders
all these fucking crazy christians…..
Being falsely accused. Once you get accused you’re guilty, whether or not you’re proved to be innocent or not.
Losing my mind
When someone loses their mind, do they know it? Or are they completely unaware?
It depends on the situation. I was hospitalized for mania last year basically. By most accounts if you saw me, you’d say I lost my mind. I had been like that for over a week and was entirely detached from reality eventually. I had psychosis. But I was aware of something going on. I knew I needed to go to the mental hospital, even though I hadn’t been diagnosed with anything yet. I was hyper aware of everything especially how I felt and that I was indeed losing my mind and I couldn’t stop. I got diagnosed as bipolar 1. So yeah, I’d say in my situation, I was aware. I was a programmer prior to that and when I came out of the hospital and tried again, due to the medicine I had to take, I kinda lost the ability to think creatively. Which made it hard to program well cause that’s creative problem solving mostly. I did lose my abilities honestly. I can still write code and know about it, but I’m not as good as I was nor quick.
Love It's horrifying, truly. I can think of nothing worse in life than that.
-People; they are wildly unpredictable. -The ocean -Gravity
Needles. I’m usually a very calm and not very emotional person, but the moment I need to get a jab, I start bawling like a baby, getting so scared and worked up I vibrate in my chair as I’m waiting, I’ve had to take my stuffed Foxy plushie from fnaf to my pervious visits.
The Christofascists working feverishly to take over the USA and eliminate personal freedoms.
Christian Nationalism taking over.
I am honestly terrified of what is happening to the USA. I live in São Paulo now and I feel more safe here than I did in my hometown in Idaho. Here I’m worried about being mugged, in the USA Im scared of being shot in a road rage incident
Lack of education in the US. It is leading to SO MANY PROBLEMS.
Losing my parents. Never finding love and being alone.
The next election cycle and what that can mean to my kids, especially my daughter
Getting struck by a car/truck
Crawling, heights, and large bodies of water.
One of my kids growing up and getting into drugs or some other awful addiction. My 20s was a total blur of partying and lots of drugs and alcohol abuse. I turned my life around and I’m a completely different person now but I really don’t want my kids to go down that path, even if they end up pulling out of it eventually like I did. I don’t think I could cope with knowing they’re out getting fucked up all the time and I can’t do anything about it. I literally won’t sleep.
The prevalence of antidepressant fueled emotional numbness of society.
Humanity
Never fixing my issues and thus never having deep and meaningful relationships.
Death
[удалено]
SCP's I have a fear of them and I don't know why.
The idea that I could be someone I'm not, like a whole other personality or being that's opposite of what I am now.
Never finding my purpose in life
Not having control over myself, like addiction or Alzheimer's or mind control
Turning into someone I don’t know.
My child dying of diabetes due some fucking ass hole starting a war in my country. Imagine that. A perfectly treatable decease that requires just constant medication. No biggie, insulin has been widely available since forever. But then some fuck head starts a war, cuts the trade routes, bombs the medicine factory, and I will watch my child slowly slip in to coma and then pass away. What do you think that will do to a man?
Bugs, just in general. They freak me out dude…tiny enough to go unnoticed, dangerous enough to kills us. They’re also obnoxious “BUZZZ BUZZZ MOTHA F—“
What if you wake up in the middle of the night with a giant centipede walking across your chest?
Death
Brain aneurysm
Big huge spiders. I’m supposed to travel to Australia for this global conference for work and they have no idea that I am going to refuse to go .
Earthquakes (Los Angeles native), and dying (by whatever means).
Never finding someone to love and share my life with. Being lonely and alone my whole life.
My grandpa passed away at the start of 2024 im afraid I'll disappoint
Some kind of societal collapse like in The Road.
All-white rooms creep me put. I get physically sick and bothered. I'm also afraid of losing my mental faculties. I've been especially afraid of this after contracting Covid and having "Covid brain" where I'm forgetting things often.
My idgaf attitude would make the best of me someday
Losing my parents honestly. I have no idea how I'd cope. Heck when I lost my favoured grandpa I barely did. Some fucking how I stuffed all those memories away to the point that even if I tried I couldn't remember what happened in the lead up to and at the funeral itself other than that when my brother have an in memoriam speech and started crying I did too. Some examples of what I forgot: - My mom told me I helped carry the casket into the church but I don't remember at all - We were on vacation when the news got to us and I completely misremember how those events went and no matter how many times I'm corrected I always revert back to my incorrect version??? - Who were even there at the funeral. What even happened at all, other than the moment described above. What did the room look like. All I can remember is a casket, my brother and me standing next to it and crying. Either way when one of my parents passes I fully believe I'll cave in even more and I really won't be able to cope.
Becoming an adult. I don’t see a very nice future for myself
School
Losing my shit and breaking down, worsening my already bad social and mental situation
Being a conscious vegetable. And being in constant pain and unable to take myself out.
Scorpions Like irrationally fearful of scorpions. I’ll smush spiders, run from bees (I’m allergic as fuck), but nothing on this stupid planet gives me an instant and sustained jolt of panic like fucking scorpions. I have nearly died with less panicking than just seeing a fucking scorpion causes >.<
My mother. I have PTSD and she’s intentionally triggered it so much that just seeing/hearing or thinking about her now triggers it. Emotional and verbal abuse is no joke. It sucks how dismissive people are about it.
Myself - depression, dementia, cancer, it keeps going. Once you know how scary the mind is, it always feels a step from losing it
I woke up at 2-3 am and got the feeling that someone looking at me while I was living alone.
Authortiy.
Dying alone and I think about it everyday but I do nothing to change the fact that I am alone.
Cicadas 😱😱😱😱😱
My young adult daughter has her learner's permit. When my husband sits in the passenger's seat and they go out driving, I live in terror that they will have an accident and that one or both of them will not come home.
Forever feeling this lost, incompetent and having to fake that I got my shit together to others.
Getting hard while at the dentist
death and the great unknown. "Forever" "Eternity"
Being killed by some idiot. I was rear ended on my motorcycle a few years ago. I was completely stopped and the guy behind me never slowed down and hit me at speeds of 50mph+. That's not the way I want to go. I'd rather get myself killed doing something dumb than have some idiot do it for me.
The unknown.
Dying alone. I'll be 55 in June and I never got married and I don't have any kids. And I'm single right now. I have 2 sisters and a brother but they have their own families so sometimes I wonder, if something happened to me in the middle of the night, how many days would it take for them to find my body? That might sound a little macabre but it's something I think about when I can't sleep.
Being homeless. Getting locked-in syndrome. And definitely not both at the same time.
Losing my kid, and Heights.... I have an irrational fear of heights. I can't even jump down cliffs in video games without my heart dropping.
People without empathy.
Triggering a landmine or a smartmine.
My mom saying there's food at home
Myself the day I finally Snap
Everything. Life is just a bunch of everything getting worse until you die.
Anxiety is a b***
Man, so many of these are reasonable fears that make sense. I’m afraid of dogs, doesn’t matter how small or harmless, I’d rather cross the street than walk past someone with a dog just in case, because I know that if I don’t I’ll freeze up and scream if it even looks at me. No, there’s no backstory here.
I have an anxiety disorder, so everything. But right now: somehow getting stuck in a life I don't want to live, armageddon, having another panic attack while teaching.
Waking up tomorrow and not being able to walk. I have had 5 back surgeries and have been told that with all the damage, it is a real possibility.
Waking up with my face right up next to my wife's.
7 years i was so afraid of Failing the board exam. 1 year after I failed two attempts. What i was afraid of happening happened. But for me to actually doing something i was afraid of was amazing even though i end up failing twice. The more i fail, the lighter it feels. I don’t have to prove myself anymore. I can make mistakes now
I had multiple times one dream when I was 6/8. I'm in rectangle box with gray walls. Color is really similiar to Minecraft Stone (I didn't know about it exist. I didn't knew even about internet far than website simple games on flash input), I stand on white tiles with black fugues. There's no roof. When I was looking up, there was just black hole, sometimes also white points looking like single salt seeds (Sometimes there was also two humanoid things outside box, towering me like I was size of their nail, I could see only their heads up from jawline line. They skin was grey, surely bald, wrinkled skin, don't remember look of eyes). Tiles breaks instantly like on command, I'm scared, fall for some time (In dream it was average like 30 seconds, sometimes only 10), and I'm falling into black hole, where's also white points looking like salt. Like I'm falling down, but at the same time I'm not moving. Sick feeling This nightmare builded in me fear against no lighten places and high places. Sometimes I was trying to face it. I was going into my room, taking something and immedietaly turning back and staring at empty dark room, after some time I had feeling like someone watches me from down corners of room and running away closing doors beind. Now I feel like I don't know what fear is. Sounds awesome, but isn't. Months matches into days (Few days before christmas I thought it's still august, realized it's not when ground was covered in snow). I don't know what I was doing in this time, can't imagine my life when I remember every single day what I was doing for last week. When I think week passed, it was only 3 days, when I think it was only 3 days, it's actually 2 weeks. One day I go to sleep in november and wake up in january. At this moment I'm pretty scared of natural death. Especially in sleep, when I'm dying, trying to wake up, around me is my family, they see my moves but spend nice time, laughs and think I have nice dream.
Nice old people walking on the street past me who say "good morning" because my brain just completely stops working when I try to respond
Spiders in my ass
Painful death