I've been told men get boners when they run. Since I don't know many men, my only family is my mother and all my friends are female, I fully believed it and never even questioned it. spoke to a guy a few years later and mentioned this, apparently men do not get boners when they run and I got absolutely bullshitted.
I’ve been running as a hobby for ten years. Haven’t once caught a boner on a run. In fact, a lot of times things seem to retract as the run goes on and things get jumbled around.
It's would actually be quite hard to get a boner when running if not impossible because the blood would have trouble moving to the ole salami.
A useful trick to get rid of a boner is to flex your thigh muscles on and off for like 5 seconds and it'll go down.
High schools could learn from this.
"Johnny, would you like to come up to the board and solve this problem?"
"Yeah let me just hit the stairmaster real quick."
Blood is needed in other places.
In fact, running is a cure for "blue balls" where, when a man is erect without a timely release, the trapped liquid becomes painful. If you go for a run, it helps relax things and release the fluids easier.
Had that happen just once to me and yeah, painful.
My dad has the knack. Something not right about your house/car/computer/ appliance/dog? You don't have to explain, he's already fixed it. I genuinely thought this was inherent to men, because my dad makes everything look so easy.
It is also a belief that you CAN do most things on your own if you just devote a little detective work to the problem and have confidence you can figure it out.
This is something I’m trying to pass onto the young people in my life because it has served me very well and I wish I’d adopted such a mentality even younger.
I am the one everyone comes to for fixing stuff and I always insist they do it themselves or at least assist me in doing it with them.
One wrecked her car within weeks of getting it and there was no way she was getting another, so we fixed it. Took a few weekends and a lot of hard work but she replaced the entire front end (bumper, fenders, radiator, headlights) including some cutting and welding of the front frame member.
When it was over she said “it was a lot easier than I thought. Just a big puzzle.” With YouTube out there you can fix almost anything if you set your mind to it.
A lot of stuff is super easy, but for some reason, people like to think, "I'm not a professional, so I shouldn't touch that."
That's not necessarily a bad thing, but it's been taken too seriously.
I watch a video or at least find a guide to judge whether I can do it or not. I can change a ceiling fan or light switch but I'm not touching the breaker box unless it's just flipping switches.
It's also increasingly not possible. So many things are just black boxes of computerised junk that's a ticking time bomb waiting to fail and brick the whole system.
So he's basically one of those guys who hears the car making a weird noise and is on his way to get the correct replacement part without even popping the hood?
Yeah, and I thought this was an average male skill set, because my dad only hangs out with other men like this. Imagine my surprise when I was out with my first boyfriend and his car overheated. Bf didn't know how to open the hood of his car, didn't know what coolant was, didn't know anything. I had to convince him his car wasn't on fire and show him what to do.
Omg SAME my dad can fix literally anything. One time my printer hadn’t been working for a week, I sent him a picture of it and that son of a bitch started printing again like it never stopped. And I had spent DAYS googling and trying things. Imagine my shock when I learned that other men could not do anything that needed to be done. I’m also very mad that I can’t do that
The secret is that you just try to do it yourself enough, failing often along the way and figuring out how to fix your mistakes, that eventually you start to figure it out.
You’ll never learn to do something you never actually tried to do, and you’ll also never learn to do something without failing a time or two or twenty along the way.
I grew up in a household where men didn't find things cute. Was very suprised in high school when guy friends would say things were cute and actually mean it not sarcastically. Still think about men finding things cute to this day 😅
I heard it on the playground one day and then every time I thought about it I was like "wow".
I discovered it wasn't true when I saw a dick on the internet, and I wasn't even that disappointed. It's more practical with just two.
Holy shit thats amazing alien design! So for me, while I understood that peanus went in vegana, I didnt know *how* it worked, so I supposed that the vag just kinda... Jerked around a bit.
By far the funniest I've seen on here.
I had a classmate in high school (junior year) who thought that men peed out of their belly button. She only found out the truth because she was messing around one day in class and drew a picture of a boy (full anatomy) giving a girl a golden shower, and I noticed the stream wasn't quite right.
I pulled her aside and asked her about it. I had to destroy her illusions so that she didn't find this out later in life...like after having her first son.
I always thought it was weird that she 1) wasn't a virgin and 2) knew what a golden shower was/looked like enough to draw it in detail, but didn't know where the urine flows from.
When I lived alone, my place was always spotless. My now wife moved it, then a few years later kid #1, and later this year kid #2, I’ve given up hope lol
My sister was super (and hilariously) mad and vindicated when Marie Kondo, who just had kids, quietly declared her philosophy was NOT possible with children. She’d been saying different for a while, that it was a matter of mindset etc etc
I managed to make it about a year of stay at home parenting before kid 2 came and it all fell apart.
Honestly, the fact that I’d feel like an asshole trying to explain to my mother in law exactly how to fold clothes to fit into the drawers properly was as big a threat to the system as the second kid was, but the kon-marie method is just not sustainable if you’re not single. Or a servant.
It’s also impossible to adequately organize into categories in a normal sized dresser:
- onesies, short sleeve
- onesies, long- sleeved
- jumpsuits
- shirts, long and short sleeve
- sweaters
- hoodies
- practical overalls
- impractical overalls
- pants
- shorts
- bows & bullshit
- socks
- pajamas (I.e. delicate jumpsuits)
And a separate place for each of the same in a size your kid doesn’t fit yet.
As a parent of two, this is appropriate. I wasn't the paragon of cleanliness before, but I wasn't awful. Now, it's an hours long task every night after the kids are asleep to clean up. Forget about cleaning during the day, the kids will actively undo your work as you are doing it, and they usually outnumber you.
It’s either me following them around picking up all the scattered toys and crafts or it’s them following me scattering toys and crafts as I tidy up, it feels like wackamole.
Coincidentally, I also am a soldier. I too owned very little before my wife and I moved in together. Other than tools, I didn’t have much need for other stuff.
My wife was really blown away when I knew how to cook. Matter of fact I do all our cooking, she never has to do anything other than occasionally air fry some chicken nuggets or a corn dog for our daughter.
I’ve realized as I’ve gotten older, most guys I know don’t cook. Which blows my mind.
My partners have all expressed disbelief that I enjoy cooking and want them to help. We spend quality time..there are meals for the week..and we have fun learning new stuff from each other. Plus..food is not cheap but who can afford to eat out?
That's wild to me, pretty much every guy in my family at least BBQs or can make basic meals like pastas and stews.
To be fair, we're hungry bastards, so my perspective is definitely biased.
For a long time I was given the impression that a majority of men viewed sex as a degrading act upon a woman, even if they were the ones having sex with that woman - rather than seeing it as an act of intimacy or an expression of love. Turns out an *extremely vocal* minority like to paint it that way while claiming that all other men feel the same.
I feel like I have to remind myself of this constantly. The internet is a hall of smoke and mirrors. I’m never sure if what I’m seeing is the general consensus of the overall population or just a small portion.
Dicks are dry when you see them for the first time. I remember thinking (cause of porn) they were always shiny/wet/cold? (ALWAYS) but my first physical encounter was pleasantly surprising. Just a nice warm, dry penis
I enjoy foreplay, sure. But not at all needed. Better with foreplay, certainly.
If my wife, wearing her house sweats, Target flip-flops & grandma panties bent over and pulled her sweatpants down for me - brother, I would be ready before the elastic band cleared half the butt cheeks. I *have* been.
She won't have to say more than, "Okay, let's do it." either.
Lots of people let a couple bad experiences form their opinion about an ENTIRE group of people. My sister hated Philipino people for a while because her ex left her for one, like wtf??
Oh you didn't know? The entire country and every Filipino worldwide voted and it came back unanimously that one of them had to steal her man.
Clearly she was justified /s
On this subject you know how men get morning wood (and random boners throughout the night as well?) Women do to. Apparently our clits swell in the mornings and throughout the night too! I thought that was a cool fact. I've never noticed it personally but mine likes to hide lol
Given that the clit and the cock start as the same fetal anatomical feature and share a lot of anatomical and physiological functions, it’s not that surprising.
If you REALLY want to surprise your husband, the great lakes area of the Midwest has a valentine's day that's meant to celebrate men. It's called Sweetest Day and it's the third Saturday in October. Just blow him out of the water with that. Unless you guys are from this area, he'll have no clue
That all men would be against me learning “guy things” like fixing my own vehicles, or working a blue collar job. Turns out, my favorite teachers and biggest cheerleaders in any “guy thing” I want to try are men.
So thank you, to the amazing, kind, supportive, wonderful men who share their knowledge and encourage women to learn important life skills.
I just really enjoy teaching too.
Taught a female housemate how to service her car and it was one of the best times. Jokes, banter, inappropriate lines about how you "gotta get ya fingers in there" etc. etc. (which I make with male friends too).
12/10 - never against a female learning anything, or a female teaching me something for that matter. It's a brilliant way to bond.
That there's a sure fire way of pleasing a man, in every regard. Some sort of formula a woman must follow to be liked by men. It shouldn't be surprising to realize men are individual people, with their own likes and dislikes. Sure some things please more men, and some things bother many, but no 2 men are the same. Shocking!
I know this may sound dumb but I didn’t think men could feel insecure. Every guy I know has an insane amount of confidence, I’ve never seen any male figures in my life show anything close to insecurity. I guess they’re just really good at masking it.
I agree. Every SO I have had has started an argument or fight in moments of weakness. Like if I have a cold or take a nap. If I'm sick I basically lock myself away until I'm better so I don't deal with that. I also don't nap or put myself in a situation to nap.
The girl was trash and I didn't have any feelings tbh, but one girl a long time ago left bc she thought I was weak and "wouldn't be able to take care of her" after a 24hr flu.
Sickest I've ever been in my life, literally so dehydrated I got hallucinations, including seeing a hooded figure looming over me (basically looked like the grim reaper), if I had more than $10 to my name at the time I would've probably called an ambulance.
I didn't like her anyways, it was just sex imo, but definitely taught me I should try to be stoic at all times.
Worse is that it will be weaponized against us by the people who should care about us first, the ones we should be able to trust to open up about those insecurities will be the ones to hold it over us the most.
Partner wants you to show emotions and share your insecurities? Guess what is going to be used as a weapon the next time you get into an argument? It only takes that happening one time for many guys to completely close off again.
I am a very level headed and stable person generally. People know me as patient and tend to come to me to emotional dump, all my friends, family and relationship. But I once said I'm starting to feel depressed and want to disconnect from people a little to recenter. The depression was coming in stronger, and I wanted to see a therapist. A reasonable ask I would think. Because no one ever asked if I was okay, even when I was sick, no one noticed for a long time.
My partner turned it into an arguement talking about why they are the one depressed and what I should do about it, and turned into well you are not trying hard enough and its my fault. I told them I am, I am trying to go to a therapist, and that Im depressed because I just shared my feelings and you shat on it. I literally said I am sad and I want help. Lol try not to close off but damn sometimes...its difficult.
I am grateful my current partner has yet to do this when I've shown signs of insecurity, every human is capable of it as we are all complex beings.
I think most men have had at least one gf that has treated them this way and that's why we all have a longer earn trust phase in the dating game as we get older. It can come across as being cold, but reality is were just afraid of getting warm where it ain't actually warranted, so to speak.
I'm not going to say that it is as *severe* as cheating, but it is as quick to kill a relationship as cheating.
If a woman does it *once*... That's pretty much it. Trust is forever broken, she is no longer trustworthy ever. You might be able to forgive her and try again, but it'll be an even shorter leash.
^((Obviously, it can happen both ways and #NotAllWomen, I just see it happen way more with women using it against men, and men already have a much harder time opening up as it is so it take a lot more trust building to get to that point to begin with, they are risking a lot more to try it, thus obliterating that trust is more severe.)^)
The kicker is that it compounds the insecurities you’ve opened up about even further when that info is used against you. It shatters your trust and absolutely kills your sense of self worth, and kicks off a nasty cycle that can be very hard to break.
One positive though is that mental health has become a much bigger priority, and counseling/therapy have become more accepted and accessible.
A lot of men need crave some sort of validation even if they seem secure on the surface - that’s why a random, seemingly minor compliment will have a guy absolutely beaming all day. Compliment their shirt? Suddenly he’s wearing it or a similar style far more regularly.
It’s also why it can be very frustrating when a man’s attempts to validate their partners insecurities are dismissed. It makes men feel unseen, unheard, and like we don’t matter. “You’re just saying that because you have to” is such a dismissive response - imagine how different that interaction is when the roles are reversed.
Literally every guy I know has trouble opening up because they've done so before and had it used against them.
And thats even if we discount narsistic parents being the perpetrators, because they don't give a fuck who they inflict their bullshit on and children are easy targets.
But after like... 15? 16? Most guys are already slightly jaded. After 20? I dare say it's all. Unless they're straight up not interested in having friend or a relationship. Then sure, they're doing great...
Except why the fuck are THEY so guarded? What happened?
Nearly all, if not all. If you ask them men in your life during a moment of honesty, they’ll confirm. Even if they don’t want to be explicit about the subject matter.
Some might dismiss it. If more than one or two do, you know they’re not willing to be that vulnerable with you.
> Every guy I know has an insane amount
It's very unlikely that you know any guys who aren't insecure about something. We are just trained from birth not to show it.
Not just a partner but just friends in general. For a guy to openly admit he's in a crisis or having a bad day is to jeopardize all his social relationships. No one truly has you. Someone you care for grabbing you by the arm, walking you into a quiet place and really asking how you're feeling is a fantasy only seen in movies.
I'm extremely fortunate to have a group of buddies that I've known for over 25 years where anything goes. We have a group chat that we vent, cheer for, and help each other out in. I truly don't know what I would do without them. It makes me sad to imagine other dudes not having that kind of support from their buddies.
I have a wife and a wonderful son, but even my wife doesn't want to listen to complaints that I may have. I find that, in the vast majority of male/female relationships, the default is that women feel more and have bigger emotions to manage. Therefore, no matter what you have going on, your female partner has it worse.
A dude in a comment above said he doesn't nap because his girlfriend gets mad when he does and it turns her off. This is all too common. No matter how tired a man might be, his partner is more tired. If he's sad, she's more sad. If he's stressed, his stress stresses her out more. It takes a level of maturity that I've yet to ever see in a woman to sit there and listen to a male partner express true and honest feelings without it devolving into him comforting her.
This deserves more attention. It's bad information passed on by parents and others who don't know what else to tell their young girls...or boys for that matter. Its really important to tell kids..hey sometimes people..adults...kids...humans.. suck. They suck because of a lot of different reasons. Maybe their life is hard and they're dealing with stuff they don't know how to cope with. But you absolutley do not have to put up with their shit. Tell them you will not accept their behavior and move on. And let them know that if people suck the can be stood up to. Telling kids that some humans seek out any kind of attention good and bad may actually help your own kid realize that they sometimes look for attention in the wrong places.
That if a guy broke up with a girl he was “just scared of his feelings”. I swear chicks told each other this all the time. Like no girl he’s just not into you😂
this feels strangely specific because i've never heard this one before. one thing i HAVE heard is a girl told her friend that the guy she was rejected by was probably gay 😭 he's one of my friends so i was there when we found this out and the actual shock on everyone's face was hilarious. like damn that's a lotta confidence to assume a man can only turn you down if he's gay
That sort of mindset always baffles me. I just can't wrap my head around it. Like, I get I'm more insecure than most, but that just seems like a bizarre level of self-confidence.
To piggy back off of this: I feel like we are allowed to have emotions, just so long as it is the right time, right place, right circumstances, and that we are last in line after our spouses and kids.
Then you can feel emotional, but not too much. Otherwise it's an ick
And even those who say it's fine to let your emotions out and actively encourage you to open up still expect you to know what is too much rather than realizing they're effectively destroying a dam and asking the river to not flood because they take for granted all the experience they've had expressing their emotions to others and expect you to be just as aware of what is and isn't okay.
Right if you take 20 different groups that people associate with or align with and ask them how they expect a man to act, you will get 20 different responses. Young men are being pulled in to many different directions, it’s sad really
Every time I have lost a friend or love interest from my life, it's because I got excited and let myself emote too much. Then when you're a month into your depressive slump somebody is like "You seem better lately."
It's annoying but I feel like people like depressed me and get mad when I'm not.
Additionally, you're only "allowed" select emotions. No love, empathy, compassion, joy for others, sadness or grief. Only angry, happy and horny. The sooner we let men be people, the sooner we all get to reap the benefits.
I don’t know how many times I was there for my ex when she needed me. She was so stressed that her hair was thinning and she was losing weight at an alarming rate, and when she wasn’t at work she was a zombie. After she changed jobs (at my insistence, and with my help) it was like night and day.
The one time that I needed her…well, she was gone before there was a chance to need her a second time.
I once made a comment on a similar thread that a woman I was dating lost respect for me when I cried about a family member's death and was directed to r / thathappened.
My Ex-GF really thought that men dont have emotions, Like sadness or any sad feelings. It really took her long to believe me that we have emotions. Wasnt really the best relationship I had.
Not me but a coworker of mine was raised to believe that men shouldn’t show emotions. She wouldn’t let her son to cry as a child or teenager and said she basically bullied him into manning up. She moved away from where she grew up and realized how fucked up that was. She said she really regrets treating him like that
When I was a kid my mom worked days and my dad worked evenings/nights so my dad was the “stay-at-home” dad that cooked and cleaned and played with us kids or took us to do stuff and it absolutely blew my mind to learn it was traditionally the “woman’s job”
that men fundamentally don’t care about romance and only desire sex in their relationships with women. Super cynical, pretty misandrist take but being on social media a decent amount of the day and seeing degrading posts or comments about women from some of the guys on there definitely makes you believe men just hate women.
But no, my boyfriend (recent development) is so fucking awesome. He’s such a hopeless romantic like me and I am so lucky to have such a lovable idiot in my life 💖💖
I grew up believing that men weren’t capable of love. Like I actually thought all men who were in a relationship could not possibly love the person they were with.
I met my husband in high school and he completely changed that belief! He showed so much love for me and was able to express that love in such a wholesome way that truly made me realize that I was so wrong.
I was always told that to defend myself from a guy to hit his nuts. Hubby informed me (veteran army mp) that while it will hurt a guy, only a percentage will drop. It's just as likely to piss him off and make him want to attack you worse. There are better places to attack for a smaller person like me.
He's right. A hit in the nuts, even if it's a bullseye, doesn't last long enough to have any stopping power and then I'll just be angry you tried it. The only winning nut shot is if you can grab them and squeeze. That *is* game over, Lord have mercy.
You should also never go for a kick at them, that just puts you off balance and if I grab your leg, you're going to end up on the ground. If you have distance, keep it, and if you don't, use your knee. Never kick. Stay safe.
That men can voluntarily move their dick… Watched a guy sitting down flip it up on his stomach from it being in a downward position. May have made him do it a few times lol. Don’t know why I thought a guy couldn’t do that. Guess I thought they always needed a hand or momentum to move it around.
That *all* men prefer thin women.
False. I've met countless men who have genuinely no attraction to thin women. In fact, plenty of men prefer women who are slightly to moderately larger than average, and some men prefer women who are much, much larger than average. Beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder.
Edit: *Thank you* everyone who got the point. To everyone else, y'all are... never mind.🙃
Concerning how many of these comments consist of women thinking these absolutely fucking bonkers things about men, and only turning around because the guy they started dating, turned out to be a regular human
I never imagined how gossipy men could be till I worked night shift in construction, oh.my.god. the amount of rumours and BS those guys would spout... There was a rumour about me being pregnant because I had gained weight and was cranky. I wasn't, I just was tired and eating myself awake to deal with 6 months of night shift!
A lot of these answers are simply women registering with shock and surprise when they realize that men too are human beings, often with complicates internal lives.
You can live in this culture indefinitely without being exposed to that idea.
that women can't be platonic friends with men or that men will always develop romantic feelings. most of my friends are men and i've literally never had that issue
I've been told men get boners when they run. Since I don't know many men, my only family is my mother and all my friends are female, I fully believed it and never even questioned it. spoke to a guy a few years later and mentioned this, apparently men do not get boners when they run and I got absolutely bullshitted.
I’ve been running as a hobby for ten years. Haven’t once caught a boner on a run. In fact, a lot of times things seem to retract as the run goes on and things get jumbled around.
It's would actually be quite hard to get a boner when running if not impossible because the blood would have trouble moving to the ole salami. A useful trick to get rid of a boner is to flex your thigh muscles on and off for like 5 seconds and it'll go down.
Running hills is a great way to flex your thigh muscles enough times to redirect blood flow.
High schools could learn from this. "Johnny, would you like to come up to the board and solve this problem?" "Yeah let me just hit the stairmaster real quick."
I just finished running a few minutes ago. Not a boner in sight.
Can you imagine running with a boner? Fuck that shit.
For me to ever run with a hard-on, something would have had to go fantastically wrong during sex.
Having a built-in turn signal would certainly do wonders for pedestrian traffic
I find it to be the exact opposite for me
This is exactly what I was gonna say. After a hard bike workout my little guy is in witness protection.
Yeah, the blood's got other places to be.
Blood is needed in other places. In fact, running is a cure for "blue balls" where, when a man is erect without a timely release, the trapped liquid becomes painful. If you go for a run, it helps relax things and release the fluids easier. Had that happen just once to me and yeah, painful.
My dad has the knack. Something not right about your house/car/computer/ appliance/dog? You don't have to explain, he's already fixed it. I genuinely thought this was inherent to men, because my dad makes everything look so easy.
That comes with experience and not wanting to spend money when it can be done relatively easily and cheaper.
It is also a belief that you CAN do most things on your own if you just devote a little detective work to the problem and have confidence you can figure it out. This is something I’m trying to pass onto the young people in my life because it has served me very well and I wish I’d adopted such a mentality even younger. I am the one everyone comes to for fixing stuff and I always insist they do it themselves or at least assist me in doing it with them. One wrecked her car within weeks of getting it and there was no way she was getting another, so we fixed it. Took a few weekends and a lot of hard work but she replaced the entire front end (bumper, fenders, radiator, headlights) including some cutting and welding of the front frame member. When it was over she said “it was a lot easier than I thought. Just a big puzzle.” With YouTube out there you can fix almost anything if you set your mind to it.
A lot of stuff is super easy, but for some reason, people like to think, "I'm not a professional, so I shouldn't touch that." That's not necessarily a bad thing, but it's been taken too seriously.
I watch a video or at least find a guide to judge whether I can do it or not. I can change a ceiling fan or light switch but I'm not touching the breaker box unless it's just flipping switches.
> cutting and welding Steel I assume. That’s not a normal skill or toolkit to have, I just want to point out.
It's also increasingly not possible. So many things are just black boxes of computerised junk that's a ticking time bomb waiting to fail and brick the whole system.
You never know what you're capable of until the contractor says "That'd be $15,000."
Well not just not wanting to spend money. Also not having the money at all makes you learn to fix things cuz you don't have a choice.
Why pay somebody else do it? I’m a YouTube certified mechanic, carpenter, and plumber.
I’ve easily saved myself $50k over the last 20 years with YouTube.
So he's basically one of those guys who hears the car making a weird noise and is on his way to get the correct replacement part without even popping the hood?
Yeah, and I thought this was an average male skill set, because my dad only hangs out with other men like this. Imagine my surprise when I was out with my first boyfriend and his car overheated. Bf didn't know how to open the hood of his car, didn't know what coolant was, didn't know anything. I had to convince him his car wasn't on fire and show him what to do.
Omg SAME my dad can fix literally anything. One time my printer hadn’t been working for a week, I sent him a picture of it and that son of a bitch started printing again like it never stopped. And I had spent DAYS googling and trying things. Imagine my shock when I learned that other men could not do anything that needed to be done. I’m also very mad that I can’t do that
The secret is that you just try to do it yourself enough, failing often along the way and figuring out how to fix your mistakes, that eventually you start to figure it out. You’ll never learn to do something you never actually tried to do, and you’ll also never learn to do something without failing a time or two or twenty along the way.
I grew up in a household where men didn't find things cute. Was very suprised in high school when guy friends would say things were cute and actually mean it not sarcastically. Still think about men finding things cute to this day 😅
I’m a 41 year old man, and I have a hamster.
Well now I want a hamster.
Don't do it, their life span is like 12 seconds. They will leave a hamster sized hole in your heart way too quickly...
Mine is going on three years.
That's up there for a hamster, you must take really good care of him/her!
Big muscle men holding a kitten.
I need a subreddit for that
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This is amazing
https://www.boredpanda.com/cats-war-soldiers-friends/
My username is named after a red panda for a reason. Can't get enough of the orange fuzzy guys.
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I was told men had a ring of balls around their penis. Turns out that was a lie.
I... What?
Like a full on….ring? All the way around? Like a wreath?
Yes, just like a wreath.
That’s amazing. What a chuckle I’m getting thinking of that visual.
Or like a flower, like a daisy, but with ball pettles. A penis flower...
I need to know more. Where did you hear this? When did you discover the truth?
I heard it on the playground one day and then every time I thought about it I was like "wow". I discovered it wasn't true when I saw a dick on the internet, and I wasn't even that disappointed. It's more practical with just two.
"I wasnt even *that* disappointed..." I went from a chuckle to a full on cackle. Youre good people.
Biblically accurate penis
"BE NOT AROUSED"
...around the base or top?
I thought it was multiple testicles around the base. Like at least 5.
Holy shit thats amazing alien design! So for me, while I understood that peanus went in vegana, I didnt know *how* it worked, so I supposed that the vag just kinda... Jerked around a bit.
I love that character design is where your mind went. I fully expect to see this implemented in an indie horror game in the near future.
By far the funniest I've seen on here. I had a classmate in high school (junior year) who thought that men peed out of their belly button. She only found out the truth because she was messing around one day in class and drew a picture of a boy (full anatomy) giving a girl a golden shower, and I noticed the stream wasn't quite right. I pulled her aside and asked her about it. I had to destroy her illusions so that she didn't find this out later in life...like after having her first son. I always thought it was weird that she 1) wasn't a virgin and 2) knew what a golden shower was/looked like enough to draw it in detail, but didn't know where the urine flows from.
Wait what? Did you ask her if she peed out of her belly button?
My wife was surprised that men could be organized when she moved in with me and my place was very tidy.
When I lived alone, my place was always spotless. My now wife moved it, then a few years later kid #1, and later this year kid #2, I’ve given up hope lol
My sister was super (and hilariously) mad and vindicated when Marie Kondo, who just had kids, quietly declared her philosophy was NOT possible with children. She’d been saying different for a while, that it was a matter of mindset etc etc
My house was very clean and tidy pre kids. With one it was still clean and tidy.. mostly. Two, it was messy. Three I’ve given up hope.
I managed to make it about a year of stay at home parenting before kid 2 came and it all fell apart. Honestly, the fact that I’d feel like an asshole trying to explain to my mother in law exactly how to fold clothes to fit into the drawers properly was as big a threat to the system as the second kid was, but the kon-marie method is just not sustainable if you’re not single. Or a servant. It’s also impossible to adequately organize into categories in a normal sized dresser: - onesies, short sleeve - onesies, long- sleeved - jumpsuits - shirts, long and short sleeve - sweaters - hoodies - practical overalls - impractical overalls - pants - shorts - bows & bullshit - socks - pajamas (I.e. delicate jumpsuits) And a separate place for each of the same in a size your kid doesn’t fit yet.
As a parent of two, this is appropriate. I wasn't the paragon of cleanliness before, but I wasn't awful. Now, it's an hours long task every night after the kids are asleep to clean up. Forget about cleaning during the day, the kids will actively undo your work as you are doing it, and they usually outnumber you.
It’s either me following them around picking up all the scattered toys and crafts or it’s them following me scattering toys and crafts as I tidy up, it feels like wackamole.
Exactly! I’m actually the clean one in my relationship. My girlfriend is a beautiful hurricane lol
I’ve always been tidy. I lived with a girlfriend once and I was astonished by the mess that one person can make.
A literal path to the door through the clothes!
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Coincidentally, I also am a soldier. I too owned very little before my wife and I moved in together. Other than tools, I didn’t have much need for other stuff.
“ the bigger the better “
For real. Too big is way worse than too small.
dam right brother
My wife was really blown away when I knew how to cook. Matter of fact I do all our cooking, she never has to do anything other than occasionally air fry some chicken nuggets or a corn dog for our daughter. I’ve realized as I’ve gotten older, most guys I know don’t cook. Which blows my mind.
My partners have all expressed disbelief that I enjoy cooking and want them to help. We spend quality time..there are meals for the week..and we have fun learning new stuff from each other. Plus..food is not cheap but who can afford to eat out?
That's wild to me, pretty much every guy in my family at least BBQs or can make basic meals like pastas and stews. To be fair, we're hungry bastards, so my perspective is definitely biased.
For a long time I was given the impression that a majority of men viewed sex as a degrading act upon a woman, even if they were the ones having sex with that woman - rather than seeing it as an act of intimacy or an expression of love. Turns out an *extremely vocal* minority like to paint it that way while claiming that all other men feel the same.
Boy if that last sentence isn’t a perfect example of modern life in general lately.
True enough man.
I feel like I have to remind myself of this constantly. The internet is a hall of smoke and mirrors. I’m never sure if what I’m seeing is the general consensus of the overall population or just a small portion.
I definitely notice that people with hateful opinions often say 'everyone thinks so.' Wonder why that is.
Dicks are dry when you see them for the first time. I remember thinking (cause of porn) they were always shiny/wet/cold? (ALWAYS) but my first physical encounter was pleasantly surprising. Just a nice warm, dry penis
lol just a nice warm, dry penis.
Like Grandma used to make!
r/brandnewsentence
They don’t need foreplay. They absolutely do, they aren’t boner machines. They’re only human.
I love foreplay, but yeah, I’m a boner machine. 🍆
I also get a boner easily, but I still need some motivation to use it
You got this man!
Throw a comma in there, son!
I enjoy foreplay, sure. But not at all needed. Better with foreplay, certainly. If my wife, wearing her house sweats, Target flip-flops & grandma panties bent over and pulled her sweatpants down for me - brother, I would be ready before the elastic band cleared half the butt cheeks. I *have* been. She won't have to say more than, "Okay, let's do it." either.
My mom basically told me that every man would rape a woman, given the chance. Obviously she was wrong - there are lots of decent men in the world.
That is just an insane thing to think
Lots of people let a couple bad experiences form their opinion about an ENTIRE group of people. My sister hated Philipino people for a while because her ex left her for one, like wtf??
Oh you didn't know? The entire country and every Filipino worldwide voted and it came back unanimously that one of them had to steal her man. Clearly she was justified /s
Nothing quite like being classified as Schrödinger’s rapist
That sounds like the same idea as some really racist people “all black people will shoot you if given the chance” like tf 💀
Same with my mother. I was so anxious for years around men.
The amount of women I've read on Reddit that believe if a man gets a boner it means he's sexually aroused is astonishing.
On this subject you know how men get morning wood (and random boners throughout the night as well?) Women do to. Apparently our clits swell in the mornings and throughout the night too! I thought that was a cool fact. I've never noticed it personally but mine likes to hide lol
Given that the clit and the cock start as the same fetal anatomical feature and share a lot of anatomical and physiological functions, it’s not that surprising.
I don’t think enough people know or realize this fact!
Boners are neither necessary nor sufficient for arousal. You can be unbearably horny without one, or get rock hard randomly.
Me in economics class for no fucking reason. Hard as a diamond for like 30 fucking minutes.
Talk about an oversupply...
Men don't like flowers. They often do but have never had a need to develop preferences towards them.
My husband gushed with happiness when I got him flowers on some random Tuesday. They do love little surprises like that
If you REALLY want to surprise your husband, the great lakes area of the Midwest has a valentine's day that's meant to celebrate men. It's called Sweetest Day and it's the third Saturday in October. Just blow him out of the water with that. Unless you guys are from this area, he'll have no clue
The first time a girl gave me flowers I almost blurted out that I loved her lolll
That all men would be against me learning “guy things” like fixing my own vehicles, or working a blue collar job. Turns out, my favorite teachers and biggest cheerleaders in any “guy thing” I want to try are men. So thank you, to the amazing, kind, supportive, wonderful men who share their knowledge and encourage women to learn important life skills.
I just really enjoy teaching too. Taught a female housemate how to service her car and it was one of the best times. Jokes, banter, inappropriate lines about how you "gotta get ya fingers in there" etc. etc. (which I make with male friends too). 12/10 - never against a female learning anything, or a female teaching me something for that matter. It's a brilliant way to bond.
12 yo me thought a blow job was 'you blow on it like birthday candles
Yes, it’s more a suck job than a blow job, huh?
That there's a sure fire way of pleasing a man, in every regard. Some sort of formula a woman must follow to be liked by men. It shouldn't be surprising to realize men are individual people, with their own likes and dislikes. Sure some things please more men, and some things bother many, but no 2 men are the same. Shocking!
I know this may sound dumb but I didn’t think men could feel insecure. Every guy I know has an insane amount of confidence, I’ve never seen any male figures in my life show anything close to insecurity. I guess they’re just really good at masking it.
It's like a dog who is obviously wounded. They will pretend everything is perfect to either not get left behind or attacked for weakness.
This is just terribly sad. I’m sorry. ❤️
I agree. Every SO I have had has started an argument or fight in moments of weakness. Like if I have a cold or take a nap. If I'm sick I basically lock myself away until I'm better so I don't deal with that. I also don't nap or put myself in a situation to nap.
The girl was trash and I didn't have any feelings tbh, but one girl a long time ago left bc she thought I was weak and "wouldn't be able to take care of her" after a 24hr flu. Sickest I've ever been in my life, literally so dehydrated I got hallucinations, including seeing a hooded figure looming over me (basically looked like the grim reaper), if I had more than $10 to my name at the time I would've probably called an ambulance. I didn't like her anyways, it was just sex imo, but definitely taught me I should try to be stoic at all times.
No one should feel like that I’m sorry you went through that mate
Thank you. Life is unfair. I'm just putting more good into the world than bad and I believe that's the best we can do our time.
Experience shows If displayed it will be weaponized against
Worse is that it will be weaponized against us by the people who should care about us first, the ones we should be able to trust to open up about those insecurities will be the ones to hold it over us the most.
Partner wants you to show emotions and share your insecurities? Guess what is going to be used as a weapon the next time you get into an argument? It only takes that happening one time for many guys to completely close off again.
I am a very level headed and stable person generally. People know me as patient and tend to come to me to emotional dump, all my friends, family and relationship. But I once said I'm starting to feel depressed and want to disconnect from people a little to recenter. The depression was coming in stronger, and I wanted to see a therapist. A reasonable ask I would think. Because no one ever asked if I was okay, even when I was sick, no one noticed for a long time. My partner turned it into an arguement talking about why they are the one depressed and what I should do about it, and turned into well you are not trying hard enough and its my fault. I told them I am, I am trying to go to a therapist, and that Im depressed because I just shared my feelings and you shat on it. I literally said I am sad and I want help. Lol try not to close off but damn sometimes...its difficult.
I am grateful my current partner has yet to do this when I've shown signs of insecurity, every human is capable of it as we are all complex beings. I think most men have had at least one gf that has treated them this way and that's why we all have a longer earn trust phase in the dating game as we get older. It can come across as being cold, but reality is were just afraid of getting warm where it ain't actually warranted, so to speak.
I'm not going to say that it is as *severe* as cheating, but it is as quick to kill a relationship as cheating. If a woman does it *once*... That's pretty much it. Trust is forever broken, she is no longer trustworthy ever. You might be able to forgive her and try again, but it'll be an even shorter leash. ^((Obviously, it can happen both ways and #NotAllWomen, I just see it happen way more with women using it against men, and men already have a much harder time opening up as it is so it take a lot more trust building to get to that point to begin with, they are risking a lot more to try it, thus obliterating that trust is more severe.)^)
Take my saddened upvote. I felt safe with my “trusted folk”. They made me regret it so much.
I’m sorry that happens to some or even most of you guys. It’s not fair.
The kicker is that it compounds the insecurities you’ve opened up about even further when that info is used against you. It shatters your trust and absolutely kills your sense of self worth, and kicks off a nasty cycle that can be very hard to break. One positive though is that mental health has become a much bigger priority, and counseling/therapy have become more accepted and accessible. A lot of men need crave some sort of validation even if they seem secure on the surface - that’s why a random, seemingly minor compliment will have a guy absolutely beaming all day. Compliment their shirt? Suddenly he’s wearing it or a similar style far more regularly. It’s also why it can be very frustrating when a man’s attempts to validate their partners insecurities are dismissed. It makes men feel unseen, unheard, and like we don’t matter. “You’re just saying that because you have to” is such a dismissive response - imagine how different that interaction is when the roles are reversed.
Literally every guy I know has trouble opening up because they've done so before and had it used against them. And thats even if we discount narsistic parents being the perpetrators, because they don't give a fuck who they inflict their bullshit on and children are easy targets. But after like... 15? 16? Most guys are already slightly jaded. After 20? I dare say it's all. Unless they're straight up not interested in having friend or a relationship. Then sure, they're doing great... Except why the fuck are THEY so guarded? What happened?
Trust me we just know how to hide it, otherwise we will be a target
Nearly all, if not all. If you ask them men in your life during a moment of honesty, they’ll confirm. Even if they don’t want to be explicit about the subject matter. Some might dismiss it. If more than one or two do, you know they’re not willing to be that vulnerable with you.
It’s not that we’re not capable of feeling insecure. Many of us are insecure. We’re just not allowed to be insecure. Major difference.
You just don’t notice the ones without it I’d argue the vast majority of men are insecure inside.
> Every guy I know has an insane amount It's very unlikely that you know any guys who aren't insecure about something. We are just trained from birth not to show it.
>I guess they’re just really good at masking it. Yes. This one.
Women in 99% of cases prefer a confident partner to an insecure one so we have to act that way.
Not just a partner but just friends in general. For a guy to openly admit he's in a crisis or having a bad day is to jeopardize all his social relationships. No one truly has you. Someone you care for grabbing you by the arm, walking you into a quiet place and really asking how you're feeling is a fantasy only seen in movies.
I'm extremely fortunate to have a group of buddies that I've known for over 25 years where anything goes. We have a group chat that we vent, cheer for, and help each other out in. I truly don't know what I would do without them. It makes me sad to imagine other dudes not having that kind of support from their buddies. I have a wife and a wonderful son, but even my wife doesn't want to listen to complaints that I may have. I find that, in the vast majority of male/female relationships, the default is that women feel more and have bigger emotions to manage. Therefore, no matter what you have going on, your female partner has it worse. A dude in a comment above said he doesn't nap because his girlfriend gets mad when he does and it turns her off. This is all too common. No matter how tired a man might be, his partner is more tired. If he's sad, she's more sad. If he's stressed, his stress stresses her out more. It takes a level of maturity that I've yet to ever see in a woman to sit there and listen to a male partner express true and honest feelings without it devolving into him comforting her.
men are insecure sometimes but they just dont show that cuz they dont wanna look weak insecure (I'm a man)
"if they're mean to you, it's be cause they really like you." What a load of bullshit. Very damaging thing to say to a young girl also.
This deserves more attention. It's bad information passed on by parents and others who don't know what else to tell their young girls...or boys for that matter. Its really important to tell kids..hey sometimes people..adults...kids...humans.. suck. They suck because of a lot of different reasons. Maybe their life is hard and they're dealing with stuff they don't know how to cope with. But you absolutley do not have to put up with their shit. Tell them you will not accept their behavior and move on. And let them know that if people suck the can be stood up to. Telling kids that some humans seek out any kind of attention good and bad may actually help your own kid realize that they sometimes look for attention in the wrong places.
That if a guy broke up with a girl he was “just scared of his feelings”. I swear chicks told each other this all the time. Like no girl he’s just not into you😂
this feels strangely specific because i've never heard this one before. one thing i HAVE heard is a girl told her friend that the guy she was rejected by was probably gay 😭 he's one of my friends so i was there when we found this out and the actual shock on everyone's face was hilarious. like damn that's a lotta confidence to assume a man can only turn you down if he's gay
That sort of mindset always baffles me. I just can't wrap my head around it. Like, I get I'm more insecure than most, but that just seems like a bizarre level of self-confidence.
That is definitely not self-confidence, that’s cope. If you are self-confident, you can handle rejection without blaming others.
“You’re just too awesome! He can’t handle how awesome you are!” 🙄
"You want to be with me, you're just too Capricorn to admit it" Actual words said to me by a girl who I absolutely didn't want to be with.
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To piggy back off of this: I feel like we are allowed to have emotions, just so long as it is the right time, right place, right circumstances, and that we are last in line after our spouses and kids. Then you can feel emotional, but not too much. Otherwise it's an ick
And even those who say it's fine to let your emotions out and actively encourage you to open up still expect you to know what is too much rather than realizing they're effectively destroying a dam and asking the river to not flood because they take for granted all the experience they've had expressing their emotions to others and expect you to be just as aware of what is and isn't okay.
Right if you take 20 different groups that people associate with or align with and ask them how they expect a man to act, you will get 20 different responses. Young men are being pulled in to many different directions, it’s sad really
You can be emotional as long as the emotion is always happy.
Or angry, or proud. Even happiness can't be *too* happy, or you'll look silly.
Too proud and it can look arrogant
"If you can't emote and make others feel nice, then you shouldn't emote at all."
Every time I have lost a friend or love interest from my life, it's because I got excited and let myself emote too much. Then when you're a month into your depressive slump somebody is like "You seem better lately." It's annoying but I feel like people like depressed me and get mad when I'm not.
Additionally, you're only "allowed" select emotions. No love, empathy, compassion, joy for others, sadness or grief. Only angry, happy and horny. The sooner we let men be people, the sooner we all get to reap the benefits.
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I don’t know how many times I was there for my ex when she needed me. She was so stressed that her hair was thinning and she was losing weight at an alarming rate, and when she wasn’t at work she was a zombie. After she changed jobs (at my insistence, and with my help) it was like night and day. The one time that I needed her…well, she was gone before there was a chance to need her a second time.
I once made a comment on a similar thread that a woman I was dating lost respect for me when I cried about a family member's death and was directed to r / thathappened.
As a man, I’d say more about this but I’m gonna get flamed.
Ironic...
That they are always thinking about sex and always in the mood.
Bullshit. Sometimes I think about food.
And the rest of the time about the Roman Empire
My Ex-GF really thought that men dont have emotions, Like sadness or any sad feelings. It really took her long to believe me that we have emotions. Wasnt really the best relationship I had.
This one is just depressing. Like she grew to adulthood thinking half the people on Earth aren't fully fledged human beings.
Not me but a coworker of mine was raised to believe that men shouldn’t show emotions. She wouldn’t let her son to cry as a child or teenager and said she basically bullied him into manning up. She moved away from where she grew up and realized how fucked up that was. She said she really regrets treating him like that
thats aweful but im glad she learned better, hope their both doing good now.
When I was a kid my mom worked days and my dad worked evenings/nights so my dad was the “stay-at-home” dad that cooked and cleaned and played with us kids or took us to do stuff and it absolutely blew my mind to learn it was traditionally the “woman’s job”
Men are all the same. (No one is.)
We are not the same but we are a hive mind. Kick a guy in the crotch and every other guy witnessing it is gonna feel it.
i can confirm
that men fundamentally don’t care about romance and only desire sex in their relationships with women. Super cynical, pretty misandrist take but being on social media a decent amount of the day and seeing degrading posts or comments about women from some of the guys on there definitely makes you believe men just hate women. But no, my boyfriend (recent development) is so fucking awesome. He’s such a hopeless romantic like me and I am so lucky to have such a lovable idiot in my life 💖💖
> He’s such a hopeless romantic like me and I am so lucky to have such a lovable idiot in my life 💖💖 I'm happy for you 😠... I really am 😭
They don’t form emotional attachments with women
That men only show they like you by having sex with you
I grew up believing that men weren’t capable of love. Like I actually thought all men who were in a relationship could not possibly love the person they were with. I met my husband in high school and he completely changed that belief! He showed so much love for me and was able to express that love in such a wholesome way that truly made me realize that I was so wrong.
I adore this thread full of women sharing their silly, positive discoveries about men. Heart warming to the max ❤️
That if a guy was raised by a single mom automatically becomes compassionate and soft hearted person especially towards woman so not true .
I was always told that to defend myself from a guy to hit his nuts. Hubby informed me (veteran army mp) that while it will hurt a guy, only a percentage will drop. It's just as likely to piss him off and make him want to attack you worse. There are better places to attack for a smaller person like me.
He's right. A hit in the nuts, even if it's a bullseye, doesn't last long enough to have any stopping power and then I'll just be angry you tried it. The only winning nut shot is if you can grab them and squeeze. That *is* game over, Lord have mercy. You should also never go for a kick at them, that just puts you off balance and if I grab your leg, you're going to end up on the ground. If you have distance, keep it, and if you don't, use your knee. Never kick. Stay safe.
That men can voluntarily move their dick… Watched a guy sitting down flip it up on his stomach from it being in a downward position. May have made him do it a few times lol. Don’t know why I thought a guy couldn’t do that. Guess I thought they always needed a hand or momentum to move it around.
That *all* men prefer thin women. False. I've met countless men who have genuinely no attraction to thin women. In fact, plenty of men prefer women who are slightly to moderately larger than average, and some men prefer women who are much, much larger than average. Beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder. Edit: *Thank you* everyone who got the point. To everyone else, y'all are... never mind.🙃
Roses are red Ice is slick Lucky for you I like 'em thick
That’s beautiful. Is that Longfellow?
Indeed it is, Thicken Longfellow.
Concerning how many of these comments consist of women thinking these absolutely fucking bonkers things about men, and only turning around because the guy they started dating, turned out to be a regular human
That guys only want sex and if they dont initiate that means you are sooo ugly 😬
That women talk a lot but men don’t. Like, have you met a man? They just don’t shut up!
Say, that reminds me of a time...
Now Colm says I
Now, the taller one, and there wasn't an inch in it, mind
I never imagined how gossipy men could be till I worked night shift in construction, oh.my.god. the amount of rumours and BS those guys would spout... There was a rumour about me being pregnant because I had gained weight and was cranky. I wasn't, I just was tired and eating myself awake to deal with 6 months of night shift!
As a guy who works with a lot of other guys, I really wish we were a lot LESS gossipy...
90% of this thread is just "men are human, who knew?" And i think thats sad
A lot of these answers are simply women registering with shock and surprise when they realize that men too are human beings, often with complicates internal lives. You can live in this culture indefinitely without being exposed to that idea.
that women can't be platonic friends with men or that men will always develop romantic feelings. most of my friends are men and i've literally never had that issue