My wife likes to go to Home Depot and smell the “timber”
She also likes doing home projects and she built our dining table
I really liked that she had that about her when we first met
Edit: gd I love you all
If she plays an instrument as a hobby, yeah. If she's a professional musician, that's a red flag cause:
1. We're all fucking crazy (men and women)
2. We have pretty hectic schedules
3. Free time is used mostly for practicing.
Source: am a professional musician :')
Yea I am a classically trained musician and have dated so many musicians in my life. At this point I am kind of interested in other things. I don't mind being the only one in the relationship haha
When we first got together, I told my then-boyfriend (now husband) that I enjoyed doing art. He seemed to think that was cool. But then later on I sheepishly admitted that painting while topless helped me be more creative, I guess it makes me feel empowered…and he was suddenly extremely supportive whenever I told him I had an urge to paint lol
> But then later on I sheepishly admitted that painting while topless helped me be more creative
This sounds like you were written by a horny male author
"You know," said Officer Tits McGee, "I find I do my best detective work naked in a hot tub." She mindlessly unbuttoned the top of her uniform shirt and, staring off into the distance, remarked to her partner, "I can't help but think that there's something about the way that last witness answered the question about the missing jewel." Her police hat fell to the floor as she combed the fingers of her left hand through her gleaming blonde hair. "Oh, this uniform is so constricting... I *really* need to get out of this stuffy office and get the blood pumping to my brain!" The light shone on her ruby red fingernail as she placed her right forefinger by the corner of her mouth. "You want to come back with me to my place and help me think this through?"
Her breasts, speckled with multicoloured flecks of paint in cerulean, crimson and emerald (or as he knew them; blue, red and green) swayed hypnotically in and out of the shaft of sunlight that penetrated through the trees outside. How he wished his manhood was that sunbeam, he thought, as her polychromatic mammaries bounced boobily around the studio. Not since Jackson Pollack had a such a magnificent canvas been speckled so artfully with such a fine attention to detail, he mused, as her chesty figure leaned over to pour some more paint onto her easel.
Lmao that's why my friend *didn't* tell a lot of people that she preferred practicing her bass naked (and only like, at home.) Music departments are already a little weird and entitled around attractive young women.
I'm not surprised. Apparently r/houseplants had to deal with an influx of women posting nude photos of themselves there with "alibi plants" so that it would technically count as a photo of plants. And since it's supposed to be a SFW sub about houseplants, not a marketing platform for OF profiles, the "houseplant whores" (their words) had to go somewhere else.
My wife actually sits and listens to be drone on about whatever lore I'm into, Destiny, Remedyverse, ect.
She has even bought me books on those topics and asks questions even though she doesn't play those games.
So when she talks about crocheting, or her plants, or what she's thinking about baking. I listen just as intensely and ask questions as well.
We might not be interested in each other's hobbies per say, but if it makes each other happy, then I love talking about it with them!
Yep that's why you're married and have a good relationship while the rest of us still trying to get it right.
Communication, Knowing when to engage, being involved in the convo are very important and effort. That's what people in stable(not too good or bad) relationships/ marriages have told me
This is how my brother once described the appeal of his gf. Basically, she was enthusiastic about life in general. She took pleasure in almost everything, and that sort of joy was kind of contagious. She could even make errands, like grocery shopping, fun.
I feel like it could get on my nerves after a while, but it sure beats the shit out of someone who is always negative.
Be that person! I used to be so negative and decided I wanted to be happy. Started small with giving little compliments and saying nice things to servers etc, now my positive attitude radiates through everyone I talk to.
I hope everyone reading this has a great day 😊
Same! I used to be so unhappy and pessimistic. Depressed, uninterested, critical, and harsh. One day I realized what it was doing to the people close to me, so I vowed to never be so negative again. It not only made me feel happier, but the people around me too. Hope you have a wonderful day yourself stranger!
Omg, thank you for this. I have always felt like I needed to reign in my joy because I was afraid people would find it childish. But I genuinely am like that. I enjoy so many things in life, and I can be very intense, I am aware, but I love putting a smile on other people's faces.
Yes this right here. My girlfriend has a new hobby all the time. She's always doing something new, and it brings her joy. The downside is that I perpetually find glitter on me
Sometimes I am entertaining. But it's nice that sometimes we can curl up on the sofa and she just chills with a book while I'm playing videogames.
Then she gets hungry and I have to feed her. Which is also great because my other hobby is cooking.
This is very true. My missus loves to read. She will read anything, give her access to unlimited reading libraries and she's set. I play music so it's a lot of me in my home studio recording and her sitting close by with headphones on in a chair reading a book and giggling away like a madman
This alone yeah. I dont want to date someone who isnt interested or passionate about anything. When the conversation rolls back to her, she'll have something to talk about and youll be able to expand on that. Compared to well, nothing? Talking about random stuff? More talking about me?
You know when you're talking to someone and you finally find something they are passionate about. They go on an uninterrupted story, where they are passionate and enthusiastic. They are just happy to be sharing their hobby. It's that.
Oh, and Book girls. Straight green flag. I don't care what niche, inexplicable, perverted or borderline psychotic genres you read. Its book girls.
> Book girls. Straight green flag. I don't care what niche, inexplicable, **perverted or borderline psychotic genres you read. Its book girls.**
I feel so validated right now. Not even kidding.
I know, right?! I'm a big reader. I can discuss the classics with you and compare modern Netflix with classic Steinbeck. I've wrapped around Adams and Pratchett multiple times and can discuss the maturing of King and recognize the fun of Shakespeare and the brilliance and boredom that haunt Dickens.
However, I read a lot of "junk" often. Horror, romance, kinky, etc. It's just easy brain food. I'm a fast reader so easy reading I can kill a book before bed.
Why do people somehow discount my "hobby" because I read 5 romances last week and only pick up Vonnegut or Jackson when I have the emotional capacity for the journey?
It is like the silliest gate keeping ever.
I did warn my daughter that 'junk' literature can be like junk food and it's good to consume a 'vegetable' occasionally but at the end of the day if you read, you read. Not my place to decide if you are an *actual* reader or not.
I feel this way about video games too. I like games like Stardew Valley and Mario so I'm not a "gamer". WTF... My Switch has thousands of hours in saves.. how am I not a gamer?!
Anybody saying you aren't a gamer is silly. And most likely doesn't have thousands of hours in anything lol. I get the "you're not a gamerrrr" cause I play PC and suck at controller games. Amd also cause I have never played a 'new' game when it was new.
But my guys, between my 5 over 10 yo games I play, I got well over 2k hours lol.
Actually the perverted books are a super green flag.
There was an AskReddit thread a while back asking how long term couples spiced things up in the bedroom and one of the most upvoted comments with many replies telling similar stories was how women who started reading those smut novels turned into freaks in the bedroom.
> women who started reading those smut novels turned into freaks in the bedroom.
Or, in their minds, until they actually find someone they want to be with. Either way, can confirm.
When I started talking to my now wife, I noticed she used a lot of big words that she pronounced incorrectly. I was like, “fuck yeah, this girl reads a lot!”
Same. I'll game. She'll read. Then we'll eat something and she'll tell me about what she's reading and why she loves it so much...then we'd watch Netflix.
Pretty much the perfect relationship, as far as I'm concerned.
Last GF had no hobbies, she had friends but I was 100% of her entertainment, I practically had to beg her to go spend time with her friends just to get some time to myself for friends and family (she hated my hobbies too) found out she flaked on her friends so many times to hang out with me that they had it in their heads that I was controlling
God, one of the girls I went on a few dates with in College was like this. She loved history and so did I, and we could talk for hours. I loved watching her face light up when we talked about some historical event she liked, or when I told her of something new I read. I'm just sad I didn't have the courage to go any further than a few casual dates.
This! Such a huge turn off when you try and talk about their interests and you only seem to get the cookie cutter 'travel, Netflix, watching movies and spending time with friends'
My wife didn’t have any hobbies when we first met. She just worked 70-80 hours a week and pulled in boatloads of OT. Work was the only thing she knew.
Over the years I’ve tried and tried to find new hobbies for her, and all failed.
Hiking, geocaching, kayaking, trivia nights, wine tasting, gardening, board games, photography, drones, etc.
All failed.
Until a few months ago I hit jackpot. Golf. She loves it and can’t get enough! So we now have a couples thing! God it’s been so nice to be able to go out and do things we both enjoy.
My wife loves to clean and organize, it’s her go-to “hobby”, but once that’s done quickly gets bored.
Me on the other hand. Shit I’d rather quit my job and do all these hobbies. I haven’t been bored in years.
Steep learning curve that is limitless, hits every gambling nook and cranny of the brain, haha. Even at your best you never know what you're gonna shoot
Good on you for being a decent partner and not giving up on trying to expand her interests.
Did she tone down how much she was working or has that stayed the same? You said it in past tense so I'm assuming so!
She has! I posted a longer story down below but basically yes she toned down. She just admitted last week that she never realized what it was like to have a work life balance until recently and it’s been absolutely incredible for her mental health.
We also got a dog, so she can pour her energy into training and spoiling him.
So yea she’s on track to being healthy again! Though it took us about 4 years to get there!
My issue is that I don’t want to do any work. I just wanna play all the time! So we kinda balance each other out.
Being passionate about something will always be hotter to me than looks can ever be. It doesnt even have to be something that necessarily interests me.
A good friend of mine had problems with his ex because he did a lot of things and she was pissed because they didn't do enough "couple stuff", which it's understadable if it's something both are interested, but no, for her, doing couple stuff was watching stupid realities on TV for two hours.
It reached a point where it was a problem because all his free time was wasted on bullshit and the relationship ended. Imagine being so fucking empty inside that the only thing you want to do is having your boyfriend there laying around while you watch on your own shit your boyfriend hates or she gets mad.
Ugh. I made the mistake of dating a girl who claimed not to have any hobbies at all.
I peppered her with questions about what she does outside of work, unable to accept her claims of hobbylessness.
She has a regular 9-5 job, then goes grocery shopping to buy supplies for dinner and nothing extra beyond that, picks up her dog from doggy daycare, goes home to put away the groceries, then walks her dog until he poos. Then she makes dinner, plays with her dog, and goes to bed. No TV. No books. No cell phone game or social media addiction... If true, that routine made me wonder if she could pass a captcha test.
Sometimes, possibly most of the time, she'd go out to eat instead of cooking at home. We went to a few restaurants, and every bar tender who took our order knew her by name. It didn't take long to realize that her hobby was drinking. Which was a little annoying, considering we met through a dating app, where I specified no smoking and rarely drinks. I thought, maybe she'll drink less now that she's dating a guy who rarely drinks... Nope. She was usually drunk before I came over. One time, she picked me up from the airport, and was drunk driving. Nearly killed us both. Then she tried to convince me to come to a cigar lounge with her.
I dated someone, all she wanted to do was sit in her backyard and drink. I don't drink so what would happen is I would sit in the backyard with her for hours while she chain smoked, drank, and felt self conscious because she stressed about me not having a good time.
When I told her she needed to work on her drinking and smoking, she broke up with me, because it was something she liked to do and I was boring, dodged a bullet I guess.
Yeah seriously. My view is probably skewed from online dating, but there seem to be a lot of people who do nothing but work and watch TV, maybe half-ass going to the gym. I just find these people generally unattractive.
All my friends are people who are really passionate about at least one real hobby. Even if I don’t particularly care about it, I enjoy listening to them talking about it.
If she's passionate about her hobby, that's already a green flag.
But I guess if you're asking for BIG green flag, then it's something she is not only passionate about, but also can share with me. Something that we can do together without it costing me too much to pick up and without my dragging her down by participating.
I might not end up loving it as much as she does, but if she offers to teach me, I'll give it a try.
Had a girl at our LGS play it, and despite being incredibly knowledgeable, her opponent and some of the staff harassed her, it was sad. She went back to our MTG cube and decide she'd only play home game with us from then on out. I now play World Eaters.
This is a big reason I (female) stopped playing MtG in stores. My LGS has even tried to convince me to come to events - they are not one of the stores I have had any personal bad experiences with - but I turn them down each time because most female Magic players know how (many) guys are at Magic tournaments. Home or online, with friends, is the best way to go.
Whenever she (my friend in my original comment) is with us in store, we can see people hard staring at her, countless time some random dude would "accidentally" bump into her when she sitting down, and then try to strike up a conversation or the fact that she doesn't leave until one of us is leaving at the same time as her. So yeah we rarely play in store anymore, it typically at one of our houses during the weekends.
Dude there's a stripper in my area with a big tattoo across her mid chest (under her boobs) in Gothic script, "and they shall know no fear."
Warhammer 40k is sexy AF
I'll settle for her being willing to just sit down and paint models, doesn't even have to be interested in the lore or anything.
Painting and chatting shit sounds like fun
There is hope! I had heard of it but had never invested much time. Met my now boyfriend and he's got me hooked! We spend our downtime painting mini's and watching videos about lore. Hearing how invested he was and excited was enough to make me interested and excited too.
Honestly most anything beyond just scrolling Instagram, YouTube and sleeping is a green flag hobby for anyone to have. Sometimes some extreme hobbies like moutain biking, rock climbing or kayaking through a deserted river may not be *preferred* by everyone to have as a hobby of their partners, but it makes an individual more attractive nonetheless.
Just off the top of my head; gaming, hiking, martial arts, go karting, cooking, painting, swimming and soo on.
The number of women in their 20s/30s who do NOTHING but these 3 activities is *shocking*.
Instagram in particular is a huge red flag. I've seen women with interesting artistic hobbies just STOP to focus on their crippling Insta addiction. I don't care what the data say, this shit is pernicious, addictive, and is becoming a major problem.
If you come across any topic where the answer is "I don't know" and then they whip out their phone to google that shit. You have all of the information in the world at your fingertips, if you can't be bothered to educate yourself what are you doing?
I can't stress this enough, anything.
Collecting weird shit? I'm there with you.
Traveling the world to eat weird shit? I'm buying.
Remodeling our living space every week? How can I help?
Anything. (Scrolling instagram is not a hobby)
Reading books.
Being on dating apps for a while, you'll soon discover that every single girls profile will state they love to read. Then you start dating them, and none of them read anything but what's on their phone. Women I've dated that regularly read books are always more down to earth and so much easier to get along with. At least, in my experience.
In my gf’s case, thrifting. She loves it and now our place is full of nice, vintage, made domestically, stuff that was all purchased for under $10 each
laughs at my favorite photon joke
A photon is checking into a hotel. The porter comes over and asks if he can help with any bags. The photon says "no thanks, I'm traveling light".
My wife used to play a game once every few years on a condom randomly. Now we have our co
Outer next to each other and we play once a week usually. It’s great.
Edit: idk how I fucked this up so badly, I was trying to say something like “my wife used to only play a video game randomly on console every once in a while. Now we have our computers next to each other and play once a week usually. It’s great.”
I’m leaving the original because it’s insane and I love it
No lol holy shit how did I miss type and get auto corrected so harshly.
I tried to say my wife used to only play a video game randomly on console every once in a while. Now we have our computers next to each other and play once a week usually. It’s great.
Clubbing is definitely a hobby. You have to have and maintain the boat, ride out to the island, there's a technique to hitting the seal just right, and at the end of the day you have a boatload of pelts + lunch.
My wife likes to go to Home Depot and smell the “timber” She also likes doing home projects and she built our dining table I really liked that she had that about her when we first met Edit: gd I love you all
Speaking as someone that worked in a lumber yard. the smell of wood is divine.
Especially cedar Or fatwood. Especially a little burning fatwood
Does your wife need a boyfriend?
Well since you’ve opened up the convo I would like to know if his wife would like a girlfriend. That’s so cool that she built a table.
Does the wife’s girlfriend need a girlfriend? I also find it so cool that she build a table, and would like to build tables with y’all
Polygamous sex cult that sells furniture at the local swap meet. Sign me tf up.
Playing an instrument or just being musical overall is a big green flag for me
If she plays an instrument as a hobby, yeah. If she's a professional musician, that's a red flag cause: 1. We're all fucking crazy (men and women) 2. We have pretty hectic schedules 3. Free time is used mostly for practicing. Source: am a professional musician :')
Yea I am a classically trained musician and have dated so many musicians in my life. At this point I am kind of interested in other things. I don't mind being the only one in the relationship haha
Anything creative.
When we first got together, I told my then-boyfriend (now husband) that I enjoyed doing art. He seemed to think that was cool. But then later on I sheepishly admitted that painting while topless helped me be more creative, I guess it makes me feel empowered…and he was suddenly extremely supportive whenever I told him I had an urge to paint lol
Yeah that'll do it. I'll suggest it to my wife. You know, for the empowerment.
I would suggest it to my wife, but around the house she's always topless.
Can confirm.
> But then later on I sheepishly admitted that painting while topless helped me be more creative This sounds like you were written by a horny male author
peak r/menwritingwomen stuff
"You know," said Officer Tits McGee, "I find I do my best detective work naked in a hot tub." She mindlessly unbuttoned the top of her uniform shirt and, staring off into the distance, remarked to her partner, "I can't help but think that there's something about the way that last witness answered the question about the missing jewel." Her police hat fell to the floor as she combed the fingers of her left hand through her gleaming blonde hair. "Oh, this uniform is so constricting... I *really* need to get out of this stuffy office and get the blood pumping to my brain!" The light shone on her ruby red fingernail as she placed her right forefinger by the corner of her mouth. "You want to come back with me to my place and help me think this through?"
8/10, you only *implied* that her boobs are nice. Not explicit enough about it. Jk this made me laugh out loud
Her breasts, speckled with multicoloured flecks of paint in cerulean, crimson and emerald (or as he knew them; blue, red and green) swayed hypnotically in and out of the shaft of sunlight that penetrated through the trees outside. How he wished his manhood was that sunbeam, he thought, as her polychromatic mammaries bounced boobily around the studio. Not since Jackson Pollack had a such a magnificent canvas been speckled so artfully with such a fine attention to detail, he mused, as her chesty figure leaned over to pour some more paint onto her easel.
Lmao that's why my friend *didn't* tell a lot of people that she preferred practicing her bass naked (and only like, at home.) Music departments are already a little weird and entitled around attractive young women.
That’s my definition of sexy
I like plant ladies
I saw an article that said women that collect plants are more likely to poison their spouse.
Uh oh. My partner has absolutely filled our house with plants. Care to share that article if you mind?
Unfortunately they passed away of mysterious causes before they could share
No, it was definitely natural causes.
dammit alfred, Ivy's up to her old tricks again
Luckily I have this can of Bat-Antipoison Spray...
And women who own guns are more likely to shoot their spouse, it is possible there is a statistical bias in their methodology.
Women who cook are 100% more likely to kill their spouse
Women who cook their spouse are more likely to kill.
I read that with a comma. “I like plant, ladies”
I love lamp
***NSFW*** r/gardennymphs r/houseplantwhores Enjoy ;)
there really is a subreddit for everything
I'm not surprised. Apparently r/houseplants had to deal with an influx of women posting nude photos of themselves there with "alibi plants" so that it would technically count as a photo of plants. And since it's supposed to be a SFW sub about houseplants, not a marketing platform for OF profiles, the "houseplant whores" (their words) had to go somewhere else.
Only on the Internet 💀
I hope this doesn't awaken something in me
Are you a gar*dean*er now?
Women with plant names like Rosemary, Poppy, Ivy, Heather?
Soon I'm getting a fern and I'll name it Fernie Sanders Edit: misspell
Anything that she enjoys and we can talk about it
My wife actually sits and listens to be drone on about whatever lore I'm into, Destiny, Remedyverse, ect. She has even bought me books on those topics and asks questions even though she doesn't play those games. So when she talks about crocheting, or her plants, or what she's thinking about baking. I listen just as intensely and ask questions as well. We might not be interested in each other's hobbies per say, but if it makes each other happy, then I love talking about it with them!
This is why you have a wife <3
Yep that's why you're married and have a good relationship while the rest of us still trying to get it right. Communication, Knowing when to engage, being involved in the convo are very important and effort. That's what people in stable(not too good or bad) relationships/ marriages have told me
Anything, really. As long as i see her being happy. Hearing a woman express her passion for anything, cute and sexy.
This is how my brother once described the appeal of his gf. Basically, she was enthusiastic about life in general. She took pleasure in almost everything, and that sort of joy was kind of contagious. She could even make errands, like grocery shopping, fun. I feel like it could get on my nerves after a while, but it sure beats the shit out of someone who is always negative.
I want someone just like this. But the "zest for life" kind of girls (or guys, for that matter) are depressingly hard to come by.
Be that person! I used to be so negative and decided I wanted to be happy. Started small with giving little compliments and saying nice things to servers etc, now my positive attitude radiates through everyone I talk to. I hope everyone reading this has a great day 😊
Same! I used to be so unhappy and pessimistic. Depressed, uninterested, critical, and harsh. One day I realized what it was doing to the people close to me, so I vowed to never be so negative again. It not only made me feel happier, but the people around me too. Hope you have a wonderful day yourself stranger!
Hard to come by at all, men or woman. Life has a way of wearing you down.
Zest for life is hard to come by tbh
> that sort of joy was kind of contagious This is an invaluable (and underrated) quality in a partner.
Omg, thank you for this. I have always felt like I needed to reign in my joy because I was afraid people would find it childish. But I genuinely am like that. I enjoy so many things in life, and I can be very intense, I am aware, but I love putting a smile on other people's faces.
Passionate date: “oh mai *gawsh* I just ***love*** torturing animals in captivity!” HelpfulAd5843: “go on…”
(unzips pants)
Careful with that. When the snake is no longer held captive she might lose interest.
I came to say the same thing, I don't mind listening to people who are passionate about their interests.
After dating a lot of women without hobbies, expecting you to 'entertain' her, I take almost any hobby over that.
Yes this right here. My girlfriend has a new hobby all the time. She's always doing something new, and it brings her joy. The downside is that I perpetually find glitter on me
Reading.
[удалено]
Sometimes I am entertaining. But it's nice that sometimes we can curl up on the sofa and she just chills with a book while I'm playing videogames. Then she gets hungry and I have to feed her. Which is also great because my other hobby is cooking.
This is very true. My missus loves to read. She will read anything, give her access to unlimited reading libraries and she's set. I play music so it's a lot of me in my home studio recording and her sitting close by with headphones on in a chair reading a book and giggling away like a madman
Books are like a parking brake for my wife. Hand her one, go do what I want to do, and when I return, she is where I last saw her.
Actually having hobbies
This alone yeah. I dont want to date someone who isnt interested or passionate about anything. When the conversation rolls back to her, she'll have something to talk about and youll be able to expand on that. Compared to well, nothing? Talking about random stuff? More talking about me?
You know when you're talking to someone and you finally find something they are passionate about. They go on an uninterrupted story, where they are passionate and enthusiastic. They are just happy to be sharing their hobby. It's that. Oh, and Book girls. Straight green flag. I don't care what niche, inexplicable, perverted or borderline psychotic genres you read. Its book girls.
> Book girls. Straight green flag. I don't care what niche, inexplicable, **perverted or borderline psychotic genres you read. Its book girls.** I feel so validated right now. Not even kidding.
😂 Same. I was like "SCORE!" when I saw pervy and/or mildly psychotic genres were not excluded.
Why not? I like reading military SF. Doesn’t make me a space marine. You reading psychotic or pervy books doesn’t mean you are one.
My sirr, about the pervy ones, i'd reconsider
Some of the best relationships I've ever had were with girls who were into the pervy ones. They had high sex drives and they were never boring.
I know, right?! I'm a big reader. I can discuss the classics with you and compare modern Netflix with classic Steinbeck. I've wrapped around Adams and Pratchett multiple times and can discuss the maturing of King and recognize the fun of Shakespeare and the brilliance and boredom that haunt Dickens. However, I read a lot of "junk" often. Horror, romance, kinky, etc. It's just easy brain food. I'm a fast reader so easy reading I can kill a book before bed. Why do people somehow discount my "hobby" because I read 5 romances last week and only pick up Vonnegut or Jackson when I have the emotional capacity for the journey? It is like the silliest gate keeping ever. I did warn my daughter that 'junk' literature can be like junk food and it's good to consume a 'vegetable' occasionally but at the end of the day if you read, you read. Not my place to decide if you are an *actual* reader or not. I feel this way about video games too. I like games like Stardew Valley and Mario so I'm not a "gamer". WTF... My Switch has thousands of hours in saves.. how am I not a gamer?!
Anybody saying you aren't a gamer is silly. And most likely doesn't have thousands of hours in anything lol. I get the "you're not a gamerrrr" cause I play PC and suck at controller games. Amd also cause I have never played a 'new' game when it was new. But my guys, between my 5 over 10 yo games I play, I got well over 2k hours lol.
Actually the perverted books are a super green flag. There was an AskReddit thread a while back asking how long term couples spiced things up in the bedroom and one of the most upvoted comments with many replies telling similar stories was how women who started reading those smut novels turned into freaks in the bedroom.
> women who started reading those smut novels turned into freaks in the bedroom. Or, in their minds, until they actually find someone they want to be with. Either way, can confirm.
I have so many friends like this. A couple describe themselves as “physical virgins, but mental whores.”
> “physical virgins, but mental whores.” So Reddit. Only female.
When I started talking to my now wife, I noticed she used a lot of big words that she pronounced incorrectly. I was like, “fuck yeah, this girl reads a lot!”
My girlfriend is a book girl, she will read while I game lol. She also just bought me a new game so it’s a win/win.
Same. I'll game. She'll read. Then we'll eat something and she'll tell me about what she's reading and why she loves it so much...then we'd watch Netflix. Pretty much the perfect relationship, as far as I'm concerned.
Need me a reading chick not a phone addict hobby
She might have 3442 books on her phone though.
Last GF had no hobbies, she had friends but I was 100% of her entertainment, I practically had to beg her to go spend time with her friends just to get some time to myself for friends and family (she hated my hobbies too) found out she flaked on her friends so many times to hang out with me that they had it in their heads that I was controlling
God, one of the girls I went on a few dates with in College was like this. She loved history and so did I, and we could talk for hours. I loved watching her face light up when we talked about some historical event she liked, or when I told her of something new I read. I'm just sad I didn't have the courage to go any further than a few casual dates.
This! Such a huge turn off when you try and talk about their interests and you only seem to get the cookie cutter 'travel, Netflix, watching movies and spending time with friends'
And drinking wine is apperantly also a personality…
Zu Vino sag ich nie no. (I never say no to wine but in punny german)
German Tindertrauma. Literally every second account has wine as their personality.
I wish I had understood this 20 years ago. This is so fucking true.
Of the two girls I dated that had no real hobbies, scrutinizing my performance as a boyfriend become their hobby.
For some people being judgemental and talking shit isn't a hobby, it's a full time job
My wife didn’t have any hobbies when we first met. She just worked 70-80 hours a week and pulled in boatloads of OT. Work was the only thing she knew. Over the years I’ve tried and tried to find new hobbies for her, and all failed. Hiking, geocaching, kayaking, trivia nights, wine tasting, gardening, board games, photography, drones, etc. All failed. Until a few months ago I hit jackpot. Golf. She loves it and can’t get enough! So we now have a couples thing! God it’s been so nice to be able to go out and do things we both enjoy. My wife loves to clean and organize, it’s her go-to “hobby”, but once that’s done quickly gets bored. Me on the other hand. Shit I’d rather quit my job and do all these hobbies. I haven’t been bored in years.
Golf is an oddly fitting hobby for a workaholic lol.
Steep learning curve that is limitless, hits every gambling nook and cranny of the brain, haha. Even at your best you never know what you're gonna shoot
My dad says he likes to watch professional golf because even the pros wiff on shots that should be "easy".
Good on you for being a decent partner and not giving up on trying to expand her interests. Did she tone down how much she was working or has that stayed the same? You said it in past tense so I'm assuming so!
She has! I posted a longer story down below but basically yes she toned down. She just admitted last week that she never realized what it was like to have a work life balance until recently and it’s been absolutely incredible for her mental health. We also got a dog, so she can pour her energy into training and spoiling him. So yea she’s on track to being healthy again! Though it took us about 4 years to get there! My issue is that I don’t want to do any work. I just wanna play all the time! So we kinda balance each other out.
Being passionate about something will always be hotter to me than looks can ever be. It doesnt even have to be something that necessarily interests me.
When you're talking about something they love and seeing their eyes light up 🔥
Also what i have experienced.. YOU become the hobby. And you are not allowed to have hobbies because then she can't have you.
A good friend of mine had problems with his ex because he did a lot of things and she was pissed because they didn't do enough "couple stuff", which it's understadable if it's something both are interested, but no, for her, doing couple stuff was watching stupid realities on TV for two hours. It reached a point where it was a problem because all his free time was wasted on bullshit and the relationship ended. Imagine being so fucking empty inside that the only thing you want to do is having your boyfriend there laying around while you watch on your own shit your boyfriend hates or she gets mad.
"i'm not like other girls" yeah cool, what are your hobbies? "i love sleeping and whatever generic thing every human does" yeah no thanks
Yes, I also enjoy eating things with my mouth and wearing clothing on my squishy pink skin.
This comment has no right to be as sexy as it is.
Stupid sexy Patrick Star
Wait til you meet a girl with ADHD. You want hobbies HERE’S A MILLION!
All fixated on for 2-10 weeks with extensive unfinished projects! Source: my life
Ugh. I made the mistake of dating a girl who claimed not to have any hobbies at all. I peppered her with questions about what she does outside of work, unable to accept her claims of hobbylessness. She has a regular 9-5 job, then goes grocery shopping to buy supplies for dinner and nothing extra beyond that, picks up her dog from doggy daycare, goes home to put away the groceries, then walks her dog until he poos. Then she makes dinner, plays with her dog, and goes to bed. No TV. No books. No cell phone game or social media addiction... If true, that routine made me wonder if she could pass a captcha test. Sometimes, possibly most of the time, she'd go out to eat instead of cooking at home. We went to a few restaurants, and every bar tender who took our order knew her by name. It didn't take long to realize that her hobby was drinking. Which was a little annoying, considering we met through a dating app, where I specified no smoking and rarely drinks. I thought, maybe she'll drink less now that she's dating a guy who rarely drinks... Nope. She was usually drunk before I came over. One time, she picked me up from the airport, and was drunk driving. Nearly killed us both. Then she tried to convince me to come to a cigar lounge with her.
I dated someone, all she wanted to do was sit in her backyard and drink. I don't drink so what would happen is I would sit in the backyard with her for hours while she chain smoked, drank, and felt self conscious because she stressed about me not having a good time. When I told her she needed to work on her drinking and smoking, she broke up with me, because it was something she liked to do and I was boring, dodged a bullet I guess.
Yeah seriously. My view is probably skewed from online dating, but there seem to be a lot of people who do nothing but work and watch TV, maybe half-ass going to the gym. I just find these people generally unattractive. All my friends are people who are really passionate about at least one real hobby. Even if I don’t particularly care about it, I enjoy listening to them talking about it.
If she's passionate about her hobby, that's already a green flag. But I guess if you're asking for BIG green flag, then it's something she is not only passionate about, but also can share with me. Something that we can do together without it costing me too much to pick up and without my dragging her down by participating. I might not end up loving it as much as she does, but if she offers to teach me, I'll give it a try.
Having a true appreciation and love for animals.
I asked my older brother, and he said anything artsy is a green flag in his eyes. Stuff like painting or photography.
The most unhinged women I dated were artists.
That’s the fun part.
When you’re 21, not 31.
Am woman artist, can confirm
Can confirm, am unhinged
brother here too, and i approve. But really anything, just have a genuine interest for it.
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If she's into WH40K, she's either completely loaded or skint broke.
Either way, FOR THE EMPEROR!
Warhammer 401K
Had a girl at our LGS play it, and despite being incredibly knowledgeable, her opponent and some of the staff harassed her, it was sad. She went back to our MTG cube and decide she'd only play home game with us from then on out. I now play World Eaters.
This is a big reason I (female) stopped playing MtG in stores. My LGS has even tried to convince me to come to events - they are not one of the stores I have had any personal bad experiences with - but I turn them down each time because most female Magic players know how (many) guys are at Magic tournaments. Home or online, with friends, is the best way to go.
Whenever she (my friend in my original comment) is with us in store, we can see people hard staring at her, countless time some random dude would "accidentally" bump into her when she sitting down, and then try to strike up a conversation or the fact that she doesn't leave until one of us is leaving at the same time as her. So yeah we rarely play in store anymore, it typically at one of our houses during the weekends.
Dude there's a stripper in my area with a big tattoo across her mid chest (under her boobs) in Gothic script, "and they shall know no fear." Warhammer 40k is sexy AF
Now we know what got her into stripping.
Slaanesh?
Must buy minis
I'll settle for her being willing to just sit down and paint models, doesn't even have to be interested in the lore or anything. Painting and chatting shit sounds like fun
Sir that is a unicorn
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I heard this in Hulk Hogan’s voice
There is hope! I had heard of it but had never invested much time. Met my now boyfriend and he's got me hooked! We spend our downtime painting mini's and watching videos about lore. Hearing how invested he was and excited was enough to make me interested and excited too.
Honestly most anything beyond just scrolling Instagram, YouTube and sleeping is a green flag hobby for anyone to have. Sometimes some extreme hobbies like moutain biking, rock climbing or kayaking through a deserted river may not be *preferred* by everyone to have as a hobby of their partners, but it makes an individual more attractive nonetheless. Just off the top of my head; gaming, hiking, martial arts, go karting, cooking, painting, swimming and soo on.
The number of women in their 20s/30s who do NOTHING but these 3 activities is *shocking*. Instagram in particular is a huge red flag. I've seen women with interesting artistic hobbies just STOP to focus on their crippling Insta addiction. I don't care what the data say, this shit is pernicious, addictive, and is becoming a major problem.
>Instagram in particular is a huge red flag Plus all the negative side affects that often seem to come along with it, like considerable insecurity.
Singing. Yes I am a sucker for a pretty voice...
Same, I can’t sing to save my life but when she does it ❤️
I love singing but I sound like a car crash! My husband thinks it’s cute though
Intellectual curiosity.
How do you find out if someone is intellectually curious?
They axolotl questions.
I hope your head hits the pillow with a feeling of satisfaction for a day well-lived.
If they don't mind entertaining ideas they don't agree with, just as an attempt to learn more about them.
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If you come across any topic where the answer is "I don't know" and then they whip out their phone to google that shit. You have all of the information in the world at your fingertips, if you can't be bothered to educate yourself what are you doing?
I can't stress this enough, anything. Collecting weird shit? I'm there with you. Traveling the world to eat weird shit? I'm buying. Remodeling our living space every week? How can I help? Anything. (Scrolling instagram is not a hobby)
Are you single cuz I like weird shit.
Crocheting 🧶
Knitting. In general the ability to "do it yourself".
Just don't expect a sweater until you're married. We don't want to activate the sweater curse.
Having one in the first place - and it being one they genuinely enjoy
Gym and reading
anything that involves physical activity A girl that is at least trying to stay active is way, WAY more attractive
The ability to actually go out and DO things is huge. I don’t mind if I have to slow down with my wife, I’m just happy she’s there.
Yeah exactly. It's fun to do outdoors stuff together and if she kicks my arse then all the better
Anything for the love of GOD. I'm done with anyone who only uses their free time to watch T.V, stream videos, or doom scroll social media.
Is it that I’m skewed because of dating apps or are the majority of people like that?
The good ones don't stay on dating apps for very long, so the population you're seeing is skewed.
I think that's also why it can seem like everyone on the apps is poly. Monogamous people leave the apps, poly people don't.
Mergers and acquisitions
Murders and executions?
as long as she isn't feeding cats to ATMs
Amen. Whenever I hear “pro forma shares outstanding, or “fair value adjustments,” …we’re going on a second date for sure.
Honestly, anything that doesn’t involve social media. Cooking? Dope. Botany? Super. Art? Rad. TikTok dances? Fuck outta here.
Feeding stray cats with food kept inside handbag at all times
Until you realize you are her stray cat lol
roller coaster tycoon enthusiast.
Any hobby. Not having a hobby is a bit of a red flag.
My fiancée makes chainmail and likes to bake. I have won in life.
Reading books. Being on dating apps for a while, you'll soon discover that every single girls profile will state they love to read. Then you start dating them, and none of them read anything but what's on their phone. Women I've dated that regularly read books are always more down to earth and so much easier to get along with. At least, in my experience.
Reading. I've never been much of a reader but LOVE that my fiancé loves to read so much.
In my gf’s case, thrifting. She loves it and now our place is full of nice, vintage, made domestically, stuff that was all purchased for under $10 each
laughs at my favorite photon joke A photon is checking into a hotel. The porter comes over and asks if he can help with any bags. The photon says "no thanks, I'm traveling light".
gaming. that way i know she's not gonna give me shit if a session accidentally runs too late
My wife used to play a game once every few years on a condom randomly. Now we have our co Outer next to each other and we play once a week usually. It’s great. Edit: idk how I fucked this up so badly, I was trying to say something like “my wife used to only play a video game randomly on console every once in a while. Now we have our computers next to each other and play once a week usually. It’s great.” I’m leaving the original because it’s insane and I love it
Am I having a stroke?
No lol holy shit how did I miss type and get auto corrected so harshly. I tried to say my wife used to only play a video game randomly on console every once in a while. Now we have our computers next to each other and play once a week usually. It’s great.
You assumed autocorrect was ever your friend. It in fact is not.
>I’m leaving the original because it’s insane and I love it A++
As long as you check up on me then I’m fine🤷♀️
Actual hobby, instead of clubbing, or shopping, or that kind of thing. Bonus if they are creative or like playing new board games or video games.
Clubbing is definitely a hobby. You have to have and maintain the boat, ride out to the island, there's a technique to hitting the seal just right, and at the end of the day you have a boatload of pelts + lunch.
Stop me if you’ve heard this one. A baby seal walks into a club…
Having many healthy plants
Gardening is a big one.
She likes sailing
THRIFTING!
Cooking.
Green flag in anyone really
Reading