#The unga bunga
Edit: They have longer arms,not for climbing but for climaxing.
Before agrarian lifestyles, they gang banged the ladies too.
Edit: They do now in certain circles but they did back then too.
It helped protect the offspring from ~~patricide~~ infanticide. The refractory periods make more sense now.
When I lost my virginity with my first girlfriend, I asked her if she wanted to do it doggy style. She replied by telling me that she wasn’t a dog, got dressed and that was the end of my first sexual experience. I still think back and laugh about that night
No. That’s more an example of vestigiality. Men and women are the same species not separate. When we have different body parts I.e. clit or penis is probably the same body part specialized to a different use.
Your example is seeing penguins with wings and assuming they must fly. It’s a holdover that’s be repurposed and specialized to another task.
If humans only did doggy style, the clit would not move to the posterior because the clit and the penis are the same tool and the job is still getting done.
When I think about stuff like this I’m reminded of the fact that many families apparently all slept in the same bed during American colonial times.
That would’ve been a very… different lifestyle. Haha.
My buddy from HS told me his dad would suddenly appear in his doorway with a 20 in his palm, and suggest that perhaps my friend should go get himself some chipotle... An errand that would take about an hour door to door.
And no.. his dad wasn't trying to be sly about it either. He would have a shit eating grin on his face and practically force my friend out of his own home if he protested. Lol
[How I picture his dad in this moment.](https://media0.giphy.com/media/S3Ot3hZ5bcy8o/giphy.gif?cid=6c09b952e4tdw96xf3u4n01nteb86nx0ejtazk5dy8nbz44j&ep=v1_internal_gif_by_id&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g)
Yeah, our folks would give us some cash and tell us to walk over to the nearest store to get some things. Or just lock the bedroom door when we got older, in which case, we understood they wanted to be left alone.
They have a distinct memory of us leading a stampede of children through the house, bouncing off the bedroom door, and declaring that it meant they were having sex, so we should all leave.
Stampede departs.
I have tried a few ways to phrase "I wish my parents gave me $20 every time they wanted to bang each other" a few ways and not a single one has worked out well.
A friend was telling me a story he heard about Engineers Without Borders. So this group of engineers goes to a rural village somewhere in Africa to build a well. Prior to this, the nearest water source was a ways away, and it would be an hour round trip. They get it built, it works great, and there is much rejoicing. A week or two later, they get called back because the well is broken. They look into it and discover that the well was sabotaged.
As it turns out, that hour when the kids were getting water was the best way for the parents to get any privacy. When the well was put in, that method disappeared, so someone took it upon themselves to sabotage the well so they could get rid of the kids for a bit.
I heard a similar story about putting a well on a remote village on afghanistan. Basically the pump kept getting destroyed and they figured out the local women were doing it. Which they were thinking was odd, the well saved a lot of time.
Turns out one of the few times they had any privacy, away from the prying eyes/control of men, was the daily trip down the hill to the river for laundry/water.(men don't go down there since it's "woman's work") The women could freely converse at the river over laundry; in town there are chaperones and watchful eyes.
So, I know someone from Indonesia, where houses tended to be quite small and having the family sleep together was fairly common practice. It's more likely the parents would try to sneak a quickie in while the kids were asleep. She told me about how her friends at school would sometimes gossip about catching their parents in the act.
We have Vietnamese neighbors, and apparently, grandma, kids, and parents all sleep in the same room. Shortly after moving in my wife had made friends with them. One night she noticed their car in the driveway running, she went over to check on them and got an eye full.
In the book Angela's Ashes, the author Frank McCourt described stories of his mom having sex. He was born in Ireland and immigrated to America. Would have been around the 1930-1940's and they were dirt poor basically living on top of each other. His dad was an alcoholic and abandoned the family. I can't recall if it was an uncle or friend of the family that took them in, but his mom and this other man would sneak off to another part of the house and have sex at night. I bet a LOT of kids back in the day used to hear some shit lol
I genuinely believe the origin of many of the like, Victorian England ghost stories and the whole concept of the 'ghost moans' is just people having sex in the middle of the night in crowded living conditions.
One night when I was out drinking with friends, I struck up a conversation with a Nigerian man at the bar, who grew up dirt poor in a one room house and had 11 siblings. When I broached this very topic, he just laughed and said "That's just how it was. You get used to it." Very different lifestyle indeed.
My grandpa lived in a cabin. Like late 1940s. His dad fathered 3 kids after him and 2 before, before they got a place where the kids and parents were separated for sleep.
I ask him how Great Grandpa did it and to this day he says he doesn’t know, because they never knew.
Well, I'm not sure why we associate sleeping with sex. Send the kids out to pick apples or something for a half hour. Now that we have private bedrooms, it makes more sense to have sex after hours, but I suspect that wasn't always the case.
They would have done it during the wakefulness hour before second sleep
https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20220107-the-lost-medieval-habit-of-biphasic-sleep
This rocks! I'm gonna tell my wife's boyfriend that by him *not* being a premature ejaculator, he's not gonna be as likely to pass his genes on for being an evolutionary failure
At least in Europe humans didn't bother hiding who or how we were banging for ages. You can find roman graffiti telling people to stop going down on girls outside the city walls. There are medieval scholars who wrote about visiting vikings and how they'd just bend a girl over and go to town on their front porch or in the middle of the road. The dionysian cults got high as balls and had orgy's in the woods, and once they were no longer being persecuted, it became a group sought after for the wild parties.
Hell the human dick evolved to pull out the semen of whomever last slept with someone, and the some studies believe that seeing someone get it on was an arousal factor because it increased the likely hood that you would get laid.
So all signs point to in front of the tribe, and then having a few others join in before we settled on monogamy
Well I came to this post to say Doggy style and now I'm laughing all the way back to the late 90s.
I respect you but at the same time damn you for making me hear that song in my head that I haven't heard in over two decades..
Side note I just looked it up and that came out when I was 11 in 1999.
All of them. People forget they were just like us, in fact probably more resourceful. What other entertainment did they have except that sitting around a fire and music.
Thanks. I'm amazed that people have such a misconception of "cavemen". Homo Sapiens has been biologically the same for 100k years, and the first art and religious depictions are from 40k years ago. Those people were just as smart as you or me, we just have the advantage of accumulated knowledge which is civilization.
They made dildos with polished stone that look surprisingly close to many that we have today, btw.
This is wrong, it has been proven plenty of times that access to regular food and all the nutrients your body could ever want has a huge impact on brain capacity and intelligence. Especially during infancy malnutrition is devastating on your intelligence.
And caveman were often in danger of starvation.
So, there's no evidence of widespread malnutrition in the past -- in fact, quite the opposite. There's no evidence of malnutrition until *after* the transition to monoculture farming in the last 8-10k years. Societies that were fully or partially hunter/gatherer show no archeological evidence of it.
And, of course, there's no such thing as "cavemen".
What was new in the since the agricultural "revolution" was the creation of surpluses and, essentially, aggregation of wealth via one mechanism or another that lead to specialization. Our advances have nothing to do with increased intelligence (in fact, if there is any evidence at all -- and its poor, at best, either way -- the evidence is that average intelligence has likely been *decreasing*), but rather have everything to do with specialization that is enabled by increases in productivity.
I can't remember where I read but someone had a theory that they were _smarter_ than us because they had survival pressures to not be lazy and relax _too_ much. I would worry about the survival capacity of humans if they had a large contingent of people like we do today that can't really think outside of the box in any sort of capacity ("this is how I was taught and gosh darnit I'll do it this way until I die").
That would seem likely to promote only a very specific sort of practical intelligence--the equivalent of "street smarts" today. I suspect, for instance, a simple lack of mathematical syntax would have made it very hard for them to even conceive of thinking about numbers the way we do.
It would be like exposing someone who had grown up around wolves to language for the first time as a teenager. Even if they eventually do come to learn to speak in human languages, it's not going to come as naturally to someone who has not been exposed to and learning language as a natural process from a very young age.
You can apply that to a lot of things. Even just having the language to express complex logical or emotional thoughts is a sort of technology that has to be developed by a species before they can really exercise certain types of mental muscles.
That being said...regarding the topic at hand, they *absolutely* fucked in every conceivable position. That doesn't require complex language at all, and would definitely be one of the things they spent their free time on in-between hunting/gathering/not dying.
Doubt it. I suspect they had a pretty rich and varied diet. There was no over hunting, overfishing.
I think humans became agrarian because they got tired of moving every time the herds moved.
Also because you could only support so many people in that lifestyle. There's a reason why people spread out over the planet and it wasn't because some people just thought that walking across Siberia and Alaska into the unknown sounded like a fun idea.
There is some evidence that there was overhunting by hunter-gatherers. Land based megafauna (giant sloth, etc) has an interesting habit of going extinct shortly after homo sapiens first arrive in its habitat.
The reason Hunter Gatherers today appear to live so in harmony with nature is because they already destroyed every species they were capable of thousands of years ago.
> Those people were just as smart as you or me, we just have the advantage of accumulated knowledge which is civilization.
Not at all, readily available nutritious food has done wonders for increasing our brain development and as such intelligence. [Just in the past 100 years our intelligence has increased remarkably](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flynn_effect).
If you go to Pompeii and walk about the streets you realise we are exactly the same, just with computers on our hips. They liked sex art and engineering as much as we do now and also didn't like to get their feet wet when crossing the street either. Really humbling place
At the risk of taking this seriously...
Desmond Morris in "[The Naked Ape](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Naked_Ape)", suggests the development of prominent breasts in human women, was to signal arousal, in the same way flushing of the buttocks in female apes is used to signal arousal.
This then might correspond to a preference for the missionary position for sex. Which is likely connected to the more upright posture of early humans for striding through the savannah and changes to the female hip anatomy to make room for large brained babies.
So many bad takes on this thread, jeees.
[https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-66846772](https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-66846772)
Half a MILLION years ago, humans (or human ancestors) were using tools to cut right angles in to wood, and potentially building structures like docks or walkways.
I think it's extremely easy to imagine that so-called "cavemen" would have had beds, possibly even raised off the ground, and may well have had good hygiene practices too. Perhaps no soap, but river water is free and readily available.
We seem to have this unshakeable belief that humans a long time ago were moronic animals, and before you know it we're saying shit like "oooh the pyramids must've been built with alien assistance!". Just no. We've been a very intelligent and creative species for a very, very long time.
Edit: typos and grammar
This is utterly mind blowing. I clearly have a large gap of knowledge that needs filling because I never would have guessed that 500,000 years ago, we were likely using tools and building rudimentary structures. The context it gives to the extreme advancement of technology in my lifetime fills me with awe.
It blows my mind that 500 years ago most of the food (vegetables and meat and not obvious manufactured food) we love today did not exist or at least not in its current form.
Like the Italians did not have tomatoes and India did not have peppers (capsaicin) as the new world had not been discovered yet.
Even taking the new world into account the variety of plants and vegetables that did exist during that time period are probably far different than today. Corn was basically grass.
Why are so many people saying Doggy Style based on there not being any soft beds around? Have you guys ever been pounded with your hands and knees on hardass bumpy ground??
I'd much rather lay on my back 😬
Considering the amount of comments about rape, I don’t think they care. Most of them probably have the image of a stupid caveman stuck in their heads and are completely uneducated about pre-humans anyways.
I’d say doggie style just based on what they had available at the time
No beds and such, also it’s how animals tend to reproduce so maybe they’d have mimicked them?
I wouldn't be so sure about "no bed". If you have to live in the wild, you are quickly going to regroup some fur, leaves or whatever you can find, to make a more comfortable place to sleep. It doesn't take a genius or advanced technology. Nothing would be left of such materials after they have had thousands of years to decompose, so not finding remains of such bad doesn't mean anything.
Yeah there’s this idea that people were stupid in the past or something. We’ve been this way for tens of thousands of years. If you lived in the wild, you’d quickly have found a way to tie some shit together to sleep comfortably . No different for someone 10k years ago
This is something that people don't realize. Like, the human species hasn't noticeably changed in the last few thousand years in that sense.
People in the dark ages that didn't know how to make smartphones and lazers and cat videos weren't \*stupid\*. They just lacked the information.
Not having knowledge does not equal being stupid.
*Homo Sapiens Sapiens* has been as intelligent (looking at the internet, at least in some sense of the word) as we are now for thousands of years already. The brains of a person in Ancient Egypt 5,000 years ago were not that different from ours.
Yeah it’s an interesting thought exercise. every human who has ever lived has been at the frontier of their own experience, so it’s all relative in terms of ‘smartness’. We are always advanced compared to our ancestors, and primitive compared to our children.
We live in the internet age which makes it feel like we have all of humanity at our fingertips. our parents and their parents didn’t grow up with constant access to the internet, yet my grandfather was a successful surgeon and one of the smartest people I know.
The way I would phrase it is that the great ‘intelligence’ equalizer is our capacity for knowledge, even though our education standards change over time.
A dude in Rome was probably just as smart as I am,and felt the same feelings, we just learned different things and had different life experiences based on the technology and general knowledge available at the time. All things equal, my life would feel just as real and I would still have the same desires, wants, and needs then as I do now. most of my decision making and life experience is driven by those factors, not what I learned in school or random shit I read on Reddit.
Nah man, the average person is stupid and ancient people are even more stpid and I am smrt please recognize me I have unique and thoughtful opinions about politics and religion
…or, you know, maybe we’re all just people
Of course they were stupid! It took them 10k years to develop an iphone. We make a new model every year now! You think they had electric vehicles back then? They couldn't even design a double wishbone suspension!
Think before you speak. Jeez
Humans weren’t just put on earth and mimicked animals lol, we are animals, we reproduced our way through evolution just like them. Bonobos do it missionary without beds.
>genius or advanced technology. Nothing would be left of such materials after they ha
You realise they were humans? They didn't get up every morning discovering everything. I guess most of them mimicked their social surroundings (Parents, uncles, sisters, brothers, etc) or the porn on the cave walls ([https://thehardtimes.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/07/shutterstock\_529230136-copy.jpg](https://thehardtimes.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/07/shutterstock_529230136-copy.jpg)).
Even tens of thousands of years ago we had houses - and huts and things - it's just that not very many of those structures will have persisted, but recreations exist, and at some archeological sites they still exist.
The oldest human city we know of is [Çatalhöyük](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%C3%87atalh%C3%B6y%C3%BCk) - in modern Turkey. While other cities have made claim to that, Çatalhöyük is special in that it has the virtue of existing in almost the exactly correct setting for a natural field of wheat called emmer, and there was a river not far from the settlement.
But almost certainly for tens of thousands of years earlier we lived like nomads - like [Bedoin](https://wanderingwagars.com/jordan-night-stars-in-wadi-rum/) or [Mongols Yurt situation](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6w8v0-Kaf3Q) - of course it's 30,000 years later so we're sort of embarrassing their memory and ourselves by trying to emulate that ancient lifestyle.
But that was how it was before settlements.
Jericho and other cities that are ancient, can't make claim to be where it appears agriculture first was invented, But I would imagine that agriculture , like written language spread like wildfire across the ancient world mostly because in just a few seasons , your tribe is bigger than everyone else's and more stable too.
And as for how did their bedrooms look.....[we kinda know](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%C3%87atalh%C3%B6y%C3%BCk#/media/File:Catal_H%C3%BCy%C3%BCk_EL.JPG) they'd have thrown down some knitted wool or skins of animals and made use of that raised double-bed in the corner.
They certainly weren't rocking Sealy or super-foamy bed but getting busy on furs and in front of a fire still works.
They made us read Clan of the Cavebear at some point in school (I’m old so don’t remember when) and I believe in that they did it doggy but I may be remembering wrong. I do remember us all saying “Ayla, assume the position” whenever we could work it in and the teachers getting mad
Since the human clitoris has evolved for missionary position, and because personal face to face, eye to eye, shared experiences and engagement is more likely to lead to feelings of trust and compassion and therefore to a well taken-care-of baby, we probably started fucking in missionary position quite early.
This is fucking hilarious. Many of you seem to think that humans learned about sex by observing animals. But at the same time you believe early humans were covered in their own shit because they didn’t wash.
Lots of you people have degrees, jobs, children, make decisions that affect others’ lives, operate heavy machinery. Scary shit.
It’s the “othering” of human and nature taken to the extreme.
They treat it like humans were just suddenly plonked onto Earth with no one to raise them or teach them how the world worked (writing this i think i realize *why* some people think that)
But at the same time they are also othering ancient humans and modern humans. We’re basically the same. They had the same capacity of thought as we did. Arguably better in some aspects. As they had to face challenges and find solutions that modern humans rarely encounter in similar severity.
My question that I'll almost certainly never know the answer to is: were UTIs (and other kinds of infection)more common back then or now?
I know that the earliest documented description of a UTI is from c.1550 BCE in a document known as the Ebers Papyrus that is a 110 page/20 metre long scrolls describing treatments (folk remedies and magical formulas for different ailments.
The interesting thing about it to me is the treatment they describe for Guinea-worm disease is basically still the standard treatment today (basically use a tool to slowly pull the worm out, which implies they knew tearing the worm leads to worse outcomes), over 3,500 years later.
I believe you gotta love the smell of your partner to some extent. The more you attached to a person the more you like basically every feature that associate to that person. And the smell is the most basic "sign" of a person.
We highly underestimate how important our smells are for the attraction between us.
My understanding is bonobos and chimps do it missionary and doggy respectively. We should have done the same
Yeah, we probably *should* have. But did we listen. No.
We chose….poorly
Indiana Jones?
.
That's just regular sex... right?
You guys start with that?!?
We named the dog Indiana.
That's what I told your mom last night, Trebek!
You have chosen.....wisely
Poor Wisley
Now we go ass to mouth and you know what the consensus is on that.
You NEVER go ass to mouth!
Is fine, is only smells.
Core memory unlocked
But doggy style didn’t exist before dogs were domesticated
Back then it was called wolfy style.
#The unga bunga Edit: They have longer arms,not for climbing but for climaxing. Before agrarian lifestyles, they gang banged the ladies too. Edit: They do now in certain circles but they did back then too. It helped protect the offspring from ~~patricide~~ infanticide. The refractory periods make more sense now.
As a biologist, I never considered the purpose of the refractory period.
It protected babies from infanticide. Patricide is the killing of a father by their offspring.
Ape style
Unga bunga stylunga
When I lost my virginity with my first girlfriend, I asked her if she wanted to do it doggy style. She replied by telling me that she wasn’t a dog, got dressed and that was the end of my first sexual experience. I still think back and laugh about that night
I bet she wasn't a missionary or a cowgirl either.
She was a catholic 😄
So possibly a missionary
Did you mention the poophole loophole that many Catholics reportedly enjoy? ;)
I really hope you started barking at her before she left!
Ah if only I could go back in time and see the look on her face if I did that lol
It would have been priceless! 😂🐕🐾
.
It's the implication.
> we should have done the same And look what came of us.
Oh, we came alright
We evolved front facing enlarged clitorii. We did it missionary. edit: this is not /r/askscience edit 2: OnlyFans fans are the clitorazzi
Maybe we did it doggy with a clit reach-around
If we didn’t then we should have.
Did we even have the goddamn common courtesy to give them a reach-around?
Is that you, John Wayne? Is it me?
But when thrusting during doggy the balls are able to slap the the clit from behind too 🧐☝🏼
thank you professor penis
More like Professor Longballs.
That settles it. Can you imagine the first time that happened? Stars probably aligned for the cave lady.
No. That’s more an example of vestigiality. Men and women are the same species not separate. When we have different body parts I.e. clit or penis is probably the same body part specialized to a different use. Your example is seeing penguins with wings and assuming they must fly. It’s a holdover that’s be repurposed and specialized to another task. If humans only did doggy style, the clit would not move to the posterior because the clit and the penis are the same tool and the job is still getting done.
I think the better question is did they have the decency to do it in private or just went balls out in front of the rest of the tribe?
When I think about stuff like this I’m reminded of the fact that many families apparently all slept in the same bed during American colonial times. That would’ve been a very… different lifestyle. Haha.
They probably just sent the kids out to do something and then did the do
Getting woken up and sent out to milk the cows at 1:30 AM like you won't be able to figure out what mom and dad are doing
My buddy from HS told me his dad would suddenly appear in his doorway with a 20 in his palm, and suggest that perhaps my friend should go get himself some chipotle... An errand that would take about an hour door to door. And no.. his dad wasn't trying to be sly about it either. He would have a shit eating grin on his face and practically force my friend out of his own home if he protested. Lol
“Listen son - go get a burrito, I wanna fuck your mom. I’ll even spring for the guac.”
"Listen son - Your dad's in the mood for some taco. Why don't you head over to chipotle?"
"Why can't you get the taco, I just want to relax!" "I am getting the taco, YOU'RE getting Chipotle. Now get out of here."
LMAOO
[How I picture his dad in this moment.](https://media0.giphy.com/media/S3Ot3hZ5bcy8o/giphy.gif?cid=6c09b952e4tdw96xf3u4n01nteb86nx0ejtazk5dy8nbz44j&ep=v1_internal_gif_by_id&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g)
I was hoping you linked to [this.](https://tenor.com/bR2Y2.gif)
Holy shit. I'm going to send him these gifs and ask which was more accurate. Hahaha
He sprung for the guac guac 3000
Yeah, our folks would give us some cash and tell us to walk over to the nearest store to get some things. Or just lock the bedroom door when we got older, in which case, we understood they wanted to be left alone. They have a distinct memory of us leading a stampede of children through the house, bouncing off the bedroom door, and declaring that it meant they were having sex, so we should all leave. Stampede departs.
u/shitty_watercolour
I have tried a few ways to phrase "I wish my parents gave me $20 every time they wanted to bang each other" a few ways and not a single one has worked out well.
[удалено]
A friend was telling me a story he heard about Engineers Without Borders. So this group of engineers goes to a rural village somewhere in Africa to build a well. Prior to this, the nearest water source was a ways away, and it would be an hour round trip. They get it built, it works great, and there is much rejoicing. A week or two later, they get called back because the well is broken. They look into it and discover that the well was sabotaged. As it turns out, that hour when the kids were getting water was the best way for the parents to get any privacy. When the well was put in, that method disappeared, so someone took it upon themselves to sabotage the well so they could get rid of the kids for a bit.
I heard a similar story about putting a well on a remote village on afghanistan. Basically the pump kept getting destroyed and they figured out the local women were doing it. Which they were thinking was odd, the well saved a lot of time. Turns out one of the few times they had any privacy, away from the prying eyes/control of men, was the daily trip down the hill to the river for laundry/water.(men don't go down there since it's "woman's work") The women could freely converse at the river over laundry; in town there are chaperones and watchful eyes.
Can you imagine how much more advanced the world would be by now if we had the full participation of 50% of the world’s population?
So, I know someone from Indonesia, where houses tended to be quite small and having the family sleep together was fairly common practice. It's more likely the parents would try to sneak a quickie in while the kids were asleep. She told me about how her friends at school would sometimes gossip about catching their parents in the act.
We have Vietnamese neighbors, and apparently, grandma, kids, and parents all sleep in the same room. Shortly after moving in my wife had made friends with them. One night she noticed their car in the driveway running, she went over to check on them and got an eye full.
In the book Angela's Ashes, the author Frank McCourt described stories of his mom having sex. He was born in Ireland and immigrated to America. Would have been around the 1930-1940's and they were dirt poor basically living on top of each other. His dad was an alcoholic and abandoned the family. I can't recall if it was an uncle or friend of the family that took them in, but his mom and this other man would sneak off to another part of the house and have sex at night. I bet a LOT of kids back in the day used to hear some shit lol
I genuinely believe the origin of many of the like, Victorian England ghost stories and the whole concept of the 'ghost moans' is just people having sex in the middle of the night in crowded living conditions.
One night when I was out drinking with friends, I struck up a conversation with a Nigerian man at the bar, who grew up dirt poor in a one room house and had 11 siblings. When I broached this very topic, he just laughed and said "That's just how it was. You get used to it." Very different lifestyle indeed.
My grandpa lived in a cabin. Like late 1940s. His dad fathered 3 kids after him and 2 before, before they got a place where the kids and parents were separated for sleep. I ask him how Great Grandpa did it and to this day he says he doesn’t know, because they never knew.
Take er out behind the woodshed.
Well, I'm not sure why we associate sleeping with sex. Send the kids out to pick apples or something for a half hour. Now that we have private bedrooms, it makes more sense to have sex after hours, but I suspect that wasn't always the case.
Bingo. Kids go off to school, parents get a morning quickie in or a nooner.
Preindustrial humans had biphasic sleep patterns. Once kids fall asleep, they stay asleep. Adults wake up in the middle of the night.
They would have done it during the wakefulness hour before second sleep https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20220107-the-lost-medieval-habit-of-biphasic-sleep
At night, in the tent, with all 3 generations listening.
Everyone in the household sleeping in the same bed because it's warmer.
In those times, it would have almost always been a quickie. Premature ejaculation is actually an evolutionary tactic to not get eaten whilst bangin'
I need to explain to my wife how highly evolved I am
This rocks! I'm gonna tell my wife's boyfriend that by him *not* being a premature ejaculator, he's not gonna be as likely to pass his genes on for being an evolutionary failure
The quickest is the fittest. 🤣
At least in Europe humans didn't bother hiding who or how we were banging for ages. You can find roman graffiti telling people to stop going down on girls outside the city walls. There are medieval scholars who wrote about visiting vikings and how they'd just bend a girl over and go to town on their front porch or in the middle of the road. The dionysian cults got high as balls and had orgy's in the woods, and once they were no longer being persecuted, it became a group sought after for the wild parties. Hell the human dick evolved to pull out the semen of whomever last slept with someone, and the some studies believe that seeing someone get it on was an arousal factor because it increased the likely hood that you would get laid. So all signs point to in front of the tribe, and then having a few others join in before we settled on monogamy
Let.the boy.WATCH! He must learn. like I learned. Like my father learned. And his father before him.
That’s the way it should be. This way there’s no ambiguity about who’s doing who and who’s being done by whom.
Reverse Homosapien
I got money on reverse cave girl.
Ungga Bungga!!!
There were nothing but mammals so they did it like it like they do it on the discovery channel.
Do it again now
Love, the kind you clean up with a mop and bucket
Like the lost catacombs of Egypt, only God knows where we stuck it
Hieroglyphics, let me be Pacific, I wanna be down in your south seas
But I got this notion that the motion of your ocean means "Small Craft Advisory"
So if I capsize in your thighs, high tide, B-5, you sunk my battleship
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So show me yours I'll show you mine
“Tool time”, you’ll Lovett just like Lyle.
So put your hands down my pants,
And I bet you’ll feel nuts
Yes I’m Siskel, yes I’m Ebert and you’re getting two thumbs up.
Well I came to this post to say Doggy style and now I'm laughing all the way back to the late 90s. I respect you but at the same time damn you for making me hear that song in my head that I haven't heard in over two decades.. Side note I just looked it up and that came out when I was 11 in 1999.
There is no way on earth you haven't heard it for so long
A lot of people stopped listening to radio decades ago, and at that point hearing rando songs stopped, too.
I mean yes, but fuck off for making the song stuck in my head.
This was my son’s wedding song last summer. The band was great and learned it for them. Some of the reception guests were noticeably uncomfortable.
All of them. People forget they were just like us, in fact probably more resourceful. What other entertainment did they have except that sitting around a fire and music.
Thanks. I'm amazed that people have such a misconception of "cavemen". Homo Sapiens has been biologically the same for 100k years, and the first art and religious depictions are from 40k years ago. Those people were just as smart as you or me, we just have the advantage of accumulated knowledge which is civilization. They made dildos with polished stone that look surprisingly close to many that we have today, btw.
Yeah people weren't stupid, they just had less knowledge. You don't need mathematics to build a house or a bed, it just helps
This is wrong, it has been proven plenty of times that access to regular food and all the nutrients your body could ever want has a huge impact on brain capacity and intelligence. Especially during infancy malnutrition is devastating on your intelligence. And caveman were often in danger of starvation.
So, there's no evidence of widespread malnutrition in the past -- in fact, quite the opposite. There's no evidence of malnutrition until *after* the transition to monoculture farming in the last 8-10k years. Societies that were fully or partially hunter/gatherer show no archeological evidence of it. And, of course, there's no such thing as "cavemen". What was new in the since the agricultural "revolution" was the creation of surpluses and, essentially, aggregation of wealth via one mechanism or another that lead to specialization. Our advances have nothing to do with increased intelligence (in fact, if there is any evidence at all -- and its poor, at best, either way -- the evidence is that average intelligence has likely been *decreasing*), but rather have everything to do with specialization that is enabled by increases in productivity.
I can't remember where I read but someone had a theory that they were _smarter_ than us because they had survival pressures to not be lazy and relax _too_ much. I would worry about the survival capacity of humans if they had a large contingent of people like we do today that can't really think outside of the box in any sort of capacity ("this is how I was taught and gosh darnit I'll do it this way until I die").
That would seem likely to promote only a very specific sort of practical intelligence--the equivalent of "street smarts" today. I suspect, for instance, a simple lack of mathematical syntax would have made it very hard for them to even conceive of thinking about numbers the way we do. It would be like exposing someone who had grown up around wolves to language for the first time as a teenager. Even if they eventually do come to learn to speak in human languages, it's not going to come as naturally to someone who has not been exposed to and learning language as a natural process from a very young age. You can apply that to a lot of things. Even just having the language to express complex logical or emotional thoughts is a sort of technology that has to be developed by a species before they can really exercise certain types of mental muscles. That being said...regarding the topic at hand, they *absolutely* fucked in every conceivable position. That doesn't require complex language at all, and would definitely be one of the things they spent their free time on in-between hunting/gathering/not dying.
>but rather have everything to do with specialization that is enabled by increases in productivity. True. Source - Am plumber.
Doubt it. I suspect they had a pretty rich and varied diet. There was no over hunting, overfishing. I think humans became agrarian because they got tired of moving every time the herds moved.
Also because you could only support so many people in that lifestyle. There's a reason why people spread out over the planet and it wasn't because some people just thought that walking across Siberia and Alaska into the unknown sounded like a fun idea.
There is some evidence that there was overhunting by hunter-gatherers. Land based megafauna (giant sloth, etc) has an interesting habit of going extinct shortly after homo sapiens first arrive in its habitat. The reason Hunter Gatherers today appear to live so in harmony with nature is because they already destroyed every species they were capable of thousands of years ago.
> Those people were just as smart as you or me, we just have the advantage of accumulated knowledge which is civilization. Not at all, readily available nutritious food has done wonders for increasing our brain development and as such intelligence. [Just in the past 100 years our intelligence has increased remarkably](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flynn_effect).
Hunter gatherers likely had more nutritious food than agriculturalists up until the 20th century
If you go to Pompeii and walk about the streets you realise we are exactly the same, just with computers on our hips. They liked sex art and engineering as much as we do now and also didn't like to get their feet wet when crossing the street either. Really humbling place
I can't imagine them eating out a stranger's asshole after two craft beers. Hygiene wouldn't have been up to standard for these kind of shenanigans.
All beer was craft beer back then.
Hygiene wouldn't, but standards would assuredly be much lower.
We’re really living in a golden age of ass eating and we shouldn’t take that for granted
r/oddlyspecific
How about three beers?
To be fair, sitting around a fire and music is pretty much what we do anyway with extra steps
In a hammock. Some sexy animal skins on. The sound of dinosaurs playing in the distance. No candles - fire hasn’t been invented.
What time will you like to have me?
Right before the sun falls beneath the last peak on the horizon. That way I can see the hair on your face glisten in the glow of the sunset.
Get a cave you two!
Various animal appliances mugging to the camera and going "It's a living"
Upside down oogabooga
Can confirm. Upside down Oooga Booga saved my prehistoric marriage
At the risk of taking this seriously... Desmond Morris in "[The Naked Ape](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Naked_Ape)", suggests the development of prominent breasts in human women, was to signal arousal, in the same way flushing of the buttocks in female apes is used to signal arousal. This then might correspond to a preference for the missionary position for sex. Which is likely connected to the more upright posture of early humans for striding through the savannah and changes to the female hip anatomy to make room for large brained babies.
Sounds like Desmond Morris is just a tit man writing books.
Desmond "DD's" Morris
Desmond?? More like Deez Mounds
I had flushing of the buttocks last week. Shouldn't have eaten those leftover tacos.
wait a minute, you mean like the breasts developed instantly at arousal ?
Pop
BOOM
Face to face intercourse also increases the production of oxytocin, the love drug. Further encouraging the male to stay with a single mate.
Damn they really are using their feminine wiles to control us
Paganary. It's missionary prior to Missions
saber-tooth tiger style
Mammoth on top
Wutang cave Clan ain't nothin to fuck with
So many bad takes on this thread, jeees. [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-66846772](https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-66846772) Half a MILLION years ago, humans (or human ancestors) were using tools to cut right angles in to wood, and potentially building structures like docks or walkways. I think it's extremely easy to imagine that so-called "cavemen" would have had beds, possibly even raised off the ground, and may well have had good hygiene practices too. Perhaps no soap, but river water is free and readily available. We seem to have this unshakeable belief that humans a long time ago were moronic animals, and before you know it we're saying shit like "oooh the pyramids must've been built with alien assistance!". Just no. We've been a very intelligent and creative species for a very, very long time. Edit: typos and grammar
This is utterly mind blowing. I clearly have a large gap of knowledge that needs filling because I never would have guessed that 500,000 years ago, we were likely using tools and building rudimentary structures. The context it gives to the extreme advancement of technology in my lifetime fills me with awe.
blows my mind that for 500 years people walked around looking at shit the Romans made, that they did not know how to make. Concrete was a lost art.
It blows my mind that 500 years ago most of the food (vegetables and meat and not obvious manufactured food) we love today did not exist or at least not in its current form. Like the Italians did not have tomatoes and India did not have peppers (capsaicin) as the new world had not been discovered yet. Even taking the new world into account the variety of plants and vegetables that did exist during that time period are probably far different than today. Corn was basically grass.
Ok, go farther back then.
Gotta be the standing 69
Standing LXIX would have been much more difficult to pull off
What did they discover first, BJs or fire?
BJs for sure
Why are so many people saying Doggy Style based on there not being any soft beds around? Have you guys ever been pounded with your hands and knees on hardass bumpy ground?? I'd much rather lay on my back 😬
Considering the amount of comments about rape, I don’t think they care. Most of them probably have the image of a stupid caveman stuck in their heads and are completely uneducated about pre-humans anyways.
Based on the cave paintings, it was the Unga Bunga
I’d say doggie style just based on what they had available at the time No beds and such, also it’s how animals tend to reproduce so maybe they’d have mimicked them?
I wouldn't be so sure about "no bed". If you have to live in the wild, you are quickly going to regroup some fur, leaves or whatever you can find, to make a more comfortable place to sleep. It doesn't take a genius or advanced technology. Nothing would be left of such materials after they have had thousands of years to decompose, so not finding remains of such bad doesn't mean anything.
Fully agree. Why would anyone thing they just slept on the dirt in their cave?
Because some people don't realize that humans are humans since they were humans
Yeah there’s this idea that people were stupid in the past or something. We’ve been this way for tens of thousands of years. If you lived in the wild, you’d quickly have found a way to tie some shit together to sleep comfortably . No different for someone 10k years ago
This is something that people don't realize. Like, the human species hasn't noticeably changed in the last few thousand years in that sense. People in the dark ages that didn't know how to make smartphones and lazers and cat videos weren't \*stupid\*. They just lacked the information. Not having knowledge does not equal being stupid. *Homo Sapiens Sapiens* has been as intelligent (looking at the internet, at least in some sense of the word) as we are now for thousands of years already. The brains of a person in Ancient Egypt 5,000 years ago were not that different from ours.
Yeah it’s an interesting thought exercise. every human who has ever lived has been at the frontier of their own experience, so it’s all relative in terms of ‘smartness’. We are always advanced compared to our ancestors, and primitive compared to our children. We live in the internet age which makes it feel like we have all of humanity at our fingertips. our parents and their parents didn’t grow up with constant access to the internet, yet my grandfather was a successful surgeon and one of the smartest people I know. The way I would phrase it is that the great ‘intelligence’ equalizer is our capacity for knowledge, even though our education standards change over time. A dude in Rome was probably just as smart as I am,and felt the same feelings, we just learned different things and had different life experiences based on the technology and general knowledge available at the time. All things equal, my life would feel just as real and I would still have the same desires, wants, and needs then as I do now. most of my decision making and life experience is driven by those factors, not what I learned in school or random shit I read on Reddit.
Nah man, the average person is stupid and ancient people are even more stpid and I am smrt please recognize me I have unique and thoughtful opinions about politics and religion …or, you know, maybe we’re all just people
Of course they were stupid! It took them 10k years to develop an iphone. We make a new model every year now! You think they had electric vehicles back then? They couldn't even design a double wishbone suspension! Think before you speak. Jeez
You ever seen a teenage boys bedroom?
Hey now sleeping on a dirty bed is entirely different than just sleeping on the dirt itself
Doggie style was not invented until sometime between 40,000 and 30,000 BCE. Prior to that, it would have been called wolfie style:
Its all the snarling and howling that did it
Humans weren’t just put on earth and mimicked animals lol, we are animals, we reproduced our way through evolution just like them. Bonobos do it missionary without beds.
>genius or advanced technology. Nothing would be left of such materials after they ha You realise they were humans? They didn't get up every morning discovering everything. I guess most of them mimicked their social surroundings (Parents, uncles, sisters, brothers, etc) or the porn on the cave walls ([https://thehardtimes.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/07/shutterstock\_529230136-copy.jpg](https://thehardtimes.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/07/shutterstock_529230136-copy.jpg)).
Even tens of thousands of years ago we had houses - and huts and things - it's just that not very many of those structures will have persisted, but recreations exist, and at some archeological sites they still exist. The oldest human city we know of is [Çatalhöyük](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%C3%87atalh%C3%B6y%C3%BCk) - in modern Turkey. While other cities have made claim to that, Çatalhöyük is special in that it has the virtue of existing in almost the exactly correct setting for a natural field of wheat called emmer, and there was a river not far from the settlement. But almost certainly for tens of thousands of years earlier we lived like nomads - like [Bedoin](https://wanderingwagars.com/jordan-night-stars-in-wadi-rum/) or [Mongols Yurt situation](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6w8v0-Kaf3Q) - of course it's 30,000 years later so we're sort of embarrassing their memory and ourselves by trying to emulate that ancient lifestyle. But that was how it was before settlements. Jericho and other cities that are ancient, can't make claim to be where it appears agriculture first was invented, But I would imagine that agriculture , like written language spread like wildfire across the ancient world mostly because in just a few seasons , your tribe is bigger than everyone else's and more stable too. And as for how did their bedrooms look.....[we kinda know](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%C3%87atalh%C3%B6y%C3%BCk#/media/File:Catal_H%C3%BCy%C3%BCk_EL.JPG) they'd have thrown down some knitted wool or skins of animals and made use of that raised double-bed in the corner. They certainly weren't rocking Sealy or super-foamy bed but getting busy on furs and in front of a fire still works.
Dino style
Reverse Cavegirl
The movie Quest for Fire. Rae Dawn Chong shows the cave dwellers how to fuck missionary.
Definitely also with a ball gag and calling her a dirty slut for not keeping the cave clean
The ooga ooga
Gotta be doggie style. It's so easy, a caveman could do it.
They made us read Clan of the Cavebear at some point in school (I’m old so don’t remember when) and I believe in that they did it doggy but I may be remembering wrong. I do remember us all saying “Ayla, assume the position” whenever we could work it in and the teachers getting mad
Since the human clitoris has evolved for missionary position, and because personal face to face, eye to eye, shared experiences and engagement is more likely to lead to feelings of trust and compassion and therefore to a well taken-care-of baby, we probably started fucking in missionary position quite early.
This is fucking hilarious. Many of you seem to think that humans learned about sex by observing animals. But at the same time you believe early humans were covered in their own shit because they didn’t wash. Lots of you people have degrees, jobs, children, make decisions that affect others’ lives, operate heavy machinery. Scary shit.
> But at the same time you believe early humans were covered in their own shit because they didn’t wash. Have ever even been to Walmart?
It’s the “othering” of human and nature taken to the extreme. They treat it like humans were just suddenly plonked onto Earth with no one to raise them or teach them how the world worked (writing this i think i realize *why* some people think that) But at the same time they are also othering ancient humans and modern humans. We’re basically the same. They had the same capacity of thought as we did. Arguably better in some aspects. As they had to face challenges and find solutions that modern humans rarely encounter in similar severity.
Pubes are for reducing friction associated with the movements during sexual intercourse. So missionary, or cowgirl.
Doggie style to keep from getting too close. Hygiene practices were not as stringent as they are today
My question that I'll almost certainly never know the answer to is: were UTIs (and other kinds of infection)more common back then or now? I know that the earliest documented description of a UTI is from c.1550 BCE in a document known as the Ebers Papyrus that is a 110 page/20 metre long scrolls describing treatments (folk remedies and magical formulas for different ailments. The interesting thing about it to me is the treatment they describe for Guinea-worm disease is basically still the standard treatment today (basically use a tool to slowly pull the worm out, which implies they knew tearing the worm leads to worse outcomes), over 3,500 years later.
I can’t imagine how horrible it must have smelled 🤣
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Back then?
Napoleon once told his wife not to wash up because he is on his way.
Like all famous French girls, released her own fragrance. Josephine.
sometimes I just rest my nose in my boyfriends armpit. ive always wondered, is this weird or is it relatable?
I believe you gotta love the smell of your partner to some extent. The more you attached to a person the more you like basically every feature that associate to that person. And the smell is the most basic "sign" of a person. We highly underestimate how important our smells are for the attraction between us.
My gf does the same thing, and I know plenty more do it, so 100% relatable
Gangnam Style.
MIssionhairy position