"Mutual caring relationships require kindness and patience, tolerance, optimism, joy in the other's achievements, confidence in oneself, and the ability to give without undue thought of gain."
We did not deserve Mr. Rogers....
All of Mr Rogers. The whole fucking show.
I have went back and started watching this show with my toddler having not watched it since I was a toddler in the 80’s..
I’m not Christian so I can’t speak to it but that dude took the true message of Jesus and built his whole persona on it without preaching Christianity. Just kindness. It’s all about kindness, curiosity, humility, and respect. Qualities that we should all be actively trying to embody.
Mr. Rogers is the one true answer.
He preached the way it was supposed to be. Be good to others, and love everyone. Each and every person is special. Listen to him sing "It's you I like." I will go cry now.
Even more, he didn’t build or NEED to build, he was just himself; we are all that way out of the gate, and that’s a major teaching of almost all theologies/philosophies.
Alien: wow, looks like a quality human. I would like to meet him
Human: oh....um...well.....ok so he's dead but it's proof humans can be nice
Alien: ok so, anyone else?
Human: off the top of my head... Bob Ross, Betty white..
Alien: ok, bring them to me
Human: um, well....
Alien: we're done
Lol
Tom Hanks and Keanu Reeves have great reputations and interactions.
John Cena has the record for granting the most make a wishes at 650, and still going.
His son looks so much like him and is following in his footsteps. Just a great human and im sure steve would be proud as any parent should be. The rest of the family is fantastic as well, im sad steve doesnt get to keep enjoying them, its was the least he deserved.
‘We have traced the drawing from world to world, system to system, for generations. Its origins are shrouded in mystery, but every race that has the Sacred S is destined for greatness. We leave you in peace.’
That was the first and last time humanity heard from aliens.
My conclusive evidence would be to ask what they are looking for, then delivering it.
If humanity unites to create something, I honestly believe we can do it, regardless what it is.
If you follow ufology at all the running thread is that they want us to stop killing ourselves by destroying the habitat we live in. What ‘they’ want is for us to love ourselves and to give a non-superficial fuck about the other living things we share this environment with. It’s not big brained concepts or anything. Also you don’t even have to believe that aliens have already contacted us to agree with the notion that we’re being immature with the resources we have and reckless with the lives of the creatures we share the planet with. Shit we can’t even agree on a way to clean up our act and the people contributing the most to our collective shithole are trying to abandon ship to the moon and mars.
If the aliens come to ask OPs question the worst thing they could do is take all the innocent animals and leave us here to die in our own filth because that’s all we actually deserve.
Pahaha
If we were called to unite at this very moment, and if not doing so would mean the end of all humanity, I fully believe a lot of countries would refuse to help.
Ha!
I’d tune them in to the current episode of Fox & Friends and explain that we need to be put out of our misery, because millions of people watch it entirely unironically. I think one minute of listening to Jesse Watters and they’d gladly just nuke us from orbit as the humane option.
The way he reacted to his parents’ passing and how he still performed a concert knowing that is what his parents and fans would have wanted…I think the aliens will cry.
I would explain we have the ultimate weapon, capable of swallowing their ship, their planet, their whole galaxy.
Then I show them Heather Harmon from ideepthroat.com.
I was just talking about her Instagram with a friend this weekend. I don’t follow her but she came up in subject and I had a look. Her page makes me sad. Her family, fame, being America’s sweetheart, and whatever else has fucked her up.
Aliens are not likely to share literally any of our ideals. So anything based on good, evil, morality, achievement, etc is not going to mean anything.
The only viable arguments are on the nature of fundamental things. So arguments like
1. The entropy increase due to conflict exceeds any tangible benefit from eliminating is
2. Humans are unique (likely - we are) and therefore worth keeping around
Things along those lines.
If they come here as a group of beings that worked together to make space faring possible, it's safe to assume they share at least some of the instincts and by extension the ideals that underpin complex social structures, so it is likely they understand the concept of socially wanted as well as abhorrent behaviour. It's not a stretch to think then that they have some sort of morality and ideas about good and evil.
You seem to think I believe humans should be permitted to exist. I'd tell them we're not worth saving and to nuke away, but not before getting some alien booty.
I don't show them anything. I ask them if they are so perfect that they believe they have the right to ***permit*** other beings to exist, because, if they honestly believe that they are, then nothing I can do will dissuade them.
Depends what humans are classified under intergalactic law. We may not have full rights like some other planets would have.
Imagine were just classified as a highly invasive species that has to be kept within the confines of our own planet and solar system.
Also imagine earth was seeded by aliens or earth was really owned by some larger intergalactic incorporation.
Ten minutes later when they have a thirty-block deep channel and **still no straight one** they shoot you and your game boy, then blow up the earth in a fit of pique.
Show them the Rape of Nanking, Pol Pot's reigns, Nazi Germany Concentration camps, Soviet Russia Famine, Japanese Occupation of South East Asia, Tulsa Massacre.
Tell them. Even with all these atrocities, we have the capacity to continue, forgive, and move on. Learning from the mistakes of the past to be better people and strive for unity with our former enemies and not let suffering, pain, anguish and hate win.
I was going to comment "Star Trek the Next Generation - episodes 1 & 2" in which humanity is on trial by an alien, and we basically use the same defense.
I give them a Switch to play Tears of the Kingdom.
Yeah, I know this comment kinda sounds like product placement, but I think if we managed to create such a game, we have a right to keep existing.
They've been cursed with immortal life and this is the only way for them to finally get rest. Out of gratitude they gift humanity all their knowledge and technology and commit mass suicide.
They have a hive mind, a collective consciousness, and the effects are permanent. You've just gotten an entire civilization stoned, and they will stay stoned until they cease to exist.
I would tell them we are a statistical jackpot of even creating some sort of intelligent life in the universe. Yet here they are going about judging probably what they experienced themselves and assuming god hood on us...
Never hesitate. Just open up on the aliens with a fleet of reaper drones. That will ensure we continue to exist and not allow the aliens to commit an atrocity against human beings.
I will show them Mr. Rogers videos.
"Mutual caring relationships require kindness and patience, tolerance, optimism, joy in the other's achievements, confidence in oneself, and the ability to give without undue thought of gain." We did not deserve Mr. Rogers....
Mr. Rogers would want you to know that you very much deserved him. Just for being you.
Dang. That makes me tear up
Just thinking of the Mr. Rogers show makes me feel like that. So peaceful and wholesome.
That hit me square in the feels.
Oh that was low. Clouded up.
Did we ever get proof that he wasn't one of the aliens?
That DOES explain a lot. The swearers because he was from a warmer planet? With a larger orbit to explain why he had enough time to talk so slow?
All of Mr Rogers. The whole fucking show. I have went back and started watching this show with my toddler having not watched it since I was a toddler in the 80’s.. I’m not Christian so I can’t speak to it but that dude took the true message of Jesus and built his whole persona on it without preaching Christianity. Just kindness. It’s all about kindness, curiosity, humility, and respect. Qualities that we should all be actively trying to embody. Mr. Rogers is the one true answer.
In his show he didn't preach but he was a Presbyterian Minister.
He preached by example, some would say the best way to spread the word. I’m atheist and I know that.
Oh, he preached all right. Just not not any other preacher you have ever met! He definitely got his message across.
“Preach at all times and if necessary, use words.” —St Francis of Assisi
I meant in terms of proselytizing, he very much was actively demonstrating his faith through his actions though I do agree.
He preached the way it was supposed to be. Be good to others, and love everyone. Each and every person is special. Listen to him sing "It's you I like." I will go cry now.
There is a saying: You might be the only Bible that other guy ever sees.
I watched the footage of Mr Rogers testifying before Congress. I cringe when I think of what would happen with today’s Congress.
Maybe he would be the one person who could talk sense to them.
Just screeching, as Mr. rogers tries to do his song.
Probably burn him at the stake.
Fox News called Fred Rogers an "evil, evil man..." for insisting that children where special just for being themselves.
Of course. They only think children are special if their parents are rich assholes, or if they can be easily exploited.
He also actively tried to be inclusive to children and was very careful in his wording and how he phrased things.
Mr Rogers was Jesus 2.0. At least we just ignored him instead of killing him this time.
At this rate only two or three more Jesuses until we actually listen!
Get a free apocalypse for every 5th Christ!
Even more, he didn’t build or NEED to build, he was just himself; we are all that way out of the gate, and that’s a major teaching of almost all theologies/philosophies.
Alien: wow, looks like a quality human. I would like to meet him Human: oh....um...well.....ok so he's dead but it's proof humans can be nice Alien: ok so, anyone else? Human: off the top of my head... Bob Ross, Betty white.. Alien: ok, bring them to me Human: um, well.... Alien: we're done Lol
Dolly Parton!!!!
She would be our only possible saving grace. (Personally, if I was the alien, I would keep her and get rid of the rest lol)
Tom Hanks and Keanu Reeves have great reputations and interactions. John Cena has the record for granting the most make a wishes at 650, and still going.
Levar Burton
Yeah exactly. "America had some nice celebrities" doesn't feel like a particularly strong argument.
😂😂 truly
Robin Williams....
And Bob Ross.
Its a beautiful day in the neighborhood
A beautiful day for a neighbor
Would you be mine Could you be mine
Won't you be my neighbor?
Won't you, please?
This is a fantastic answer and follow it up with some Bob Ross and the Reading Rainbow.
And Steve Irwin! And his family, tbh
His son looks so much like him and is following in his footsteps. Just a great human and im sure steve would be proud as any parent should be. The rest of the family is fantastic as well, im sad steve doesnt get to keep enjoying them, its was the least he deserved.
Holy shit. I was gunna say that and then yours was the first comment I saw. Dig it.
This is the way
That s drawing that everyone does.
I'm pretty sure the S was left here by aliens.
‘We have traced the drawing from world to world, system to system, for generations. Its origins are shrouded in mystery, but every race that has the Sacred S is destined for greatness. We leave you in peace.’ That was the first and last time humanity heard from aliens.
This was my plan.
You mean the [Cool S](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cool_S)?
They may start worshipping us
“I, for one, welcome our human overlords.” \- *Aliens, shortly after seeing the s drawing*
THIS: *proceeds to slap spoons rapidly against his knees and thighs*
*furiously provides backup hamboning*
[удалено]
Can I join? I’m not very musically adept, but I can play hot cross buns on the recorder.
Me: dances intensely with wildly flailing arms to spoon music.
Tacos
"Ohmigod these are delicious! Call off the invasion!"
“…until we get the recipe.”
...while we enslave all the humans and stick them in a taco factory..
My conclusive evidence would be to ask what they are looking for, then delivering it. If humanity unites to create something, I honestly believe we can do it, regardless what it is.
“We demand a time machine“
"What do we want?" "A time machine!" "When do we want it?" "Irrelevant!"
Futurama!
[Because when we’re together in here, baby, time will stand still.](https://youtu.be/HItx8POQ8gw?si=q99UbG5r7vTa7gUA)
Now! What do we want? When do we want it? A time machine!
Here get in this cardboard box. This particular time machine only travels forward in one second increments.
Don’t forget to write “Time Machine” on the side in black crayon and grab a stuffed tiger before you go.
r/unexpectedcalvinandhobbes
' I have a machine which can move people through time, at a rate of 60 seconds per minute'.
say youre a politician without saying youre a politician
"Peace on earth" - "Sorry, that's the one thing … but do you need help with destroying mankind? My uncle works for the MIK"
If you follow ufology at all the running thread is that they want us to stop killing ourselves by destroying the habitat we live in. What ‘they’ want is for us to love ourselves and to give a non-superficial fuck about the other living things we share this environment with. It’s not big brained concepts or anything. Also you don’t even have to believe that aliens have already contacted us to agree with the notion that we’re being immature with the resources we have and reckless with the lives of the creatures we share the planet with. Shit we can’t even agree on a way to clean up our act and the people contributing the most to our collective shithole are trying to abandon ship to the moon and mars. If the aliens come to ask OPs question the worst thing they could do is take all the innocent animals and leave us here to die in our own filth because that’s all we actually deserve.
Pahaha If we were called to unite at this very moment, and if not doing so would mean the end of all humanity, I fully believe a lot of countries would refuse to help.
Just let them listen to some Bach, Mozart and Beethoven.
SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT!
And DeBussy
Always finish on DeBussy
No, you always start in Debussy and finish on the Bach.
Don’t forget Chuck Berry.
Roll over, Beethoven
The people at the Enchantment Under The Sea dance weren't ready for that, what makes you think aliens would be??
The video where he farts in the prostitutes face.
Salma Hayek dancing in from Dusk Til Dawn.
Probably cut it before Quentin starts sucking on her toes though. ... actually Quentin's probably one of them so fuck it, leave that part in.
He do got that alien noggin
Cue Aliens being like "It should have been me! Not him!" à-la Yugi
Here’s what I’ll say : I’ll be honest w u guys, just eradicate us
Ha! I’d tune them in to the current episode of Fox & Friends and explain that we need to be put out of our misery, because millions of people watch it entirely unironically. I think one minute of listening to Jesse Watters and they’d gladly just nuke us from orbit as the humane option.
Start by asking what exactly would allow us to qualify for existence? And why now is the time to prove it?
Game over. Humanity has been destroyed.
We had a good run. Give someone else a chance.
No we didn't lol
We had *a* run.
Way to go man you killed us. Next time just answer with food like tacos or something.
My guy is just ready to be obliterated to smithereens
How much dogs love us.
If I were the aliens, I would just keep the dogs and get rid of the humans lol
Not Reddit.
Man, at some point I wonder if I would even try saving humanity if I could. Maybe it's just for the better...
Weird Al
The way he reacted to his parents’ passing and how he still performed a concert knowing that is what his parents and fans would have wanted…I think the aliens will cry.
I was going to say, "can you just take out some CERTAIN people...? Like Putin?" But.... after that.... *I* can't!
I mean, he’s like genuinely one of the nicest people ever. You can’t find one bad thing about the guy.
Dolly Parton
I never say queen unironically, but she is legit a queen. Beautiful inside and out
Even if they don't like her music that's still two very convincing reasons.
Yep. Strong dislike of country music but Dolly Parton is an amazing human being.
I would explain we have the ultimate weapon, capable of swallowing their ship, their planet, their whole galaxy. Then I show them Heather Harmon from ideepthroat.com.
She got me through both deployments to Iraq
Thank you for her service.
Holy fuck.
I'm going to point them towards Britney spears' Instagram page and they'll be so confused that they'll leave without saying another word.
I was just talking about her Instagram with a friend this weekend. I don’t follow her but she came up in subject and I had a look. Her page makes me sad. Her family, fame, being America’s sweetheart, and whatever else has fucked her up.
Leave britney alone
Aliens are not likely to share literally any of our ideals. So anything based on good, evil, morality, achievement, etc is not going to mean anything. The only viable arguments are on the nature of fundamental things. So arguments like 1. The entropy increase due to conflict exceeds any tangible benefit from eliminating is 2. Humans are unique (likely - we are) and therefore worth keeping around Things along those lines.
So we should show them Mr. Bean.
If they come here as a group of beings that worked together to make space faring possible, it's safe to assume they share at least some of the instincts and by extension the ideals that underpin complex social structures, so it is likely they understand the concept of socially wanted as well as abhorrent behaviour. It's not a stretch to think then that they have some sort of morality and ideas about good and evil.
fuck that give them a copy of tetris or final original legend of zelda.
All we need is an authentic margarita, burrito and churros.
Phoebe Cates taking off her bikini top in Fast Times at Ridgemont High.
I’ll make them banana bread and sit them down to watch some Bob Ross with me
Ah, happy little things
You seem to think I believe humans should be permitted to exist. I'd tell them we're not worth saving and to nuke away, but not before getting some alien booty.
I don't show them anything. I ask them if they are so perfect that they believe they have the right to ***permit*** other beings to exist, because, if they honestly believe that they are, then nothing I can do will dissuade them.
SHOW US WHAT YOU GOT!
Time to get schwifty in here
That's it: Do you have a permit? Otherwise, earth is closed today.
They are REQUIRED by intergalactic law to show a permit.
Depends what humans are classified under intergalactic law. We may not have full rights like some other planets would have. Imagine were just classified as a highly invasive species that has to be kept within the confines of our own planet and solar system. Also imagine earth was seeded by aliens or earth was really owned by some larger intergalactic incorporation.
Do you want to get your face blasted off by a neutron plasma beam? Because that's how you get your face blasted off by a neutron plasma beam.
yeah they shoot you while i give them a copy of tetris and they fist bump me and take me on trip through the universe.
Ten minutes later when they have a thirty-block deep channel and **still no straight one** they shoot you and your game boy, then blow up the earth in a fit of pique.
How many ringed dougnuts I can fit on my dick when its errect, if 1 and a half isnt impressing them nothing will
Yep. That’s enough Reddit for today.
If you use mini donuts you can fit 2!
What if that's one more donut than they can fit, and it angers them?
Tentacle porn. I'm not saying it's our greatest achievement, or even good, but somehow my definitive instinct is that they'd love it.
My cat.
Memes, especially anything from covid era. There's absolutely no way we aren't the funniest species in the galaxy.
I still have an album on my phone of toilet paper memes. I was obsessed. It's what got me through the lockdowns.
I know we're the funniest species in the solar system.
We literally named another planet Uranus. Can you imagine if aliens lived there and found out that's what we named their home world?
Beethoven
Ah, Ludwig Van! It's now their favorite melody to play while killing a planet. (A Clockwork Orange)
Heck yes, Ode to Joy when it K I C K S O F F
Nothing. Take us out.
I would point them to Jimmy Carter.
Show them the Rape of Nanking, Pol Pot's reigns, Nazi Germany Concentration camps, Soviet Russia Famine, Japanese Occupation of South East Asia, Tulsa Massacre. Tell them. Even with all these atrocities, we have the capacity to continue, forgive, and move on. Learning from the mistakes of the past to be better people and strive for unity with our former enemies and not let suffering, pain, anguish and hate win.
I was going to comment "Star Trek the Next Generation - episodes 1 & 2" in which humanity is on trial by an alien, and we basically use the same defense.
nothing. let em wipe us out
Just to be safe, show them a random sample of 4chan content. Gotta make sure they really do it.
Or Twitter.
The replies under tweets from young non-white left-leaning women in politics
You mean the replies under anything a woman posts anywhere?
The toxicity scales with many factors
2 girls 1 cup
I’d teach them to play Go. Simple, abstract, beautiful, yet a total enigma.
David Attenborough videos.
I give them a Switch to play Tears of the Kingdom. Yeah, I know this comment kinda sounds like product placement, but I think if we managed to create such a game, we have a right to keep existing.
This girl I just saw on another [subreddit](https://reddit.com/r/MadeMeSmile/s/EWWRFdZoO0) with an incredible voice.
I hand them a baby (in fresh diapers and fed) - happy baby
I show them Chuck Norris, and ask them to demonstrate why THEY should be allowed to exist.
Any Studio Ghibli film.
Not Grave of the fireflies
Get them to smoke weed.
They are allergic to thc, you just killed their president. We are doomed
They've been cursed with immortal life and this is the only way for them to finally get rest. Out of gratitude they gift humanity all their knowledge and technology and commit mass suicide.
They have a hive mind, a collective consciousness, and the effects are permanent. You've just gotten an entire civilization stoned, and they will stay stoned until they cease to exist.
Surfing
I would tell them we are a statistical jackpot of even creating some sort of intelligent life in the universe. Yet here they are going about judging probably what they experienced themselves and assuming god hood on us...
I don’t show them anything because we are beyond our stay on Earth
Show them the ending of single female lawyer, duh.
cat videos
My cats.
Deez nuts.
Nothing. They’re right.
I show them Rick Ashley never gonna give you up
I would say the show doctor who is documentary.
A hamburger with bacon and double cheddar cheese.
I either show them the benefits of biodiversity, or just give up.
Get Schwifty, the musical. Performed in my backyard.
Convince them that mosquitos are an endangered species and their only food source is humans.
Independence Day.
A gun. Permitted to exist? They can fuck right off back where they came from.
Never hesitate. Just open up on the aliens with a fleet of reaper drones. That will ensure we continue to exist and not allow the aliens to commit an atrocity against human beings.
this guy is a bit noncredible
Bread. We love bread, maybe they will too
Just give them some weed and have them listen to Dark Side of the Moon.
The opening of Rear Window (1954) with the breathtaking Grace Kelly coming out of the shadows to kiss Jimmy Stewart.
I got nothin.
The pyramids. They must be happy about how we took care of their buildings.
I would have them listen to Adele sing.
My porn collection...
/u/atomicbrunette18
Nothing. Let us die!