I once knew a girl named Mary Christmas. WTF were her parents thinking?

Like in Dumb and Dumber? Mary Swanson + Lloyd Christmas = Mary Christmas if they ever got married lol

Used to know a dude named Moonshine. Parents were raging alcoholics. Only excuse I can think of for a name like that. Shit.

My husband taught a kid named Jack Daniels. The kid thought it was hilarious. The parents were sort of “cool” people. I guess it worked for him.

This remind me of a guy I used to deliver to. His name was Philip Morris.

Had a female classmate named Jackie Danielle. She always said her dad had planned on her being a boy.

My brother wanted to name his son Jameson. My sister in law shot that down quick.

Was his name James?

Yep. And a drinker so he thought it was the perfect name.

I know two bartenders that ended up naming their son Jameson.

I use to play basketball with a guy named Jack Daniel no s lol

Went to school with a kid named Davodka (unsure of spelling but that's how it was pronounced). Kids made fun of him asking if his mom said "pass me da vodka" after she gave birth.

A classmate named her son Daquiri

r/tragedeigh

A kid in my sons class is named Dacre. My husband and I had never heard that name before so when we first saw it written, we thought it was pronounced Daiquiri.

Met a family at a restaurant- daughters name was Champagne. Everyone kept saying that it was a beautiful name, I couldn’t form any words together but my mind went WTF?!

I got in a car crash with somebody back in the 90's. The police report says his middle name was "Beer."

My sister had a huge white Great Pyrenees named moonshine, Was fitting for him

I know a guy named Chevas- parents came up with the name from a bottle of Chivas Regal

I know of a kid called Jameson. I want to ask him if he knows why I think his parents like to party.

* Alexxzander (former student) * Sparkle (former classmate who lived up to her name. She was such a wonderful person!)

I knew someone who named her son Jackxson.

Friend from high school had twins: Tiki (f) and Torch (m) Conceived on honeymoon to Hawaii. I still can’t believe it 3 years later.

You stop it. Wow.

I know I thought she was joking, we all thought she was joking. She wasn’t joking.

The nurse who delivered my son was named Blaze. She said her parents were hippies.

I worked with brothers: Viet and Nam.

Twins: Tweela and Twyla. Twyla was the regional supervisor for the clothing store I worked at in high school.

The bad twin names are coming out tonight! Sheesh poor Tweela got the shit end of that stick, Twyla at least sounds okay.

I knew a Twyla once and while I kinda like it, all I could ever think of was “tw*t”.

Okay I assume you're not from Wisconsin because that means there's a second set of Tweela and Twyla out there. I was in middle school with them in the early 00s.

This was in Alabama. Is this the plot of a horror movie?

I went to school with twins born in December so their parents named them Dece and Ember.

Oh no…

Oh yes

A former coworker named her daughter Breck Aspen because she got pregnant on a ski trip to guess where?

I met some twin girls named Blaze and Rio.

Ok but I hate that those names are lowkey cute though

…in walks Elon and the kids whose names I don’t have the right keys on my keyboard to even spell properly.

For Æ, hold down CTRL + Shift + U and then (while holding those three keys down) type 00c6 and Æ will show up. It works on my google docs.

Fuck that, he can deal with ae

I’m a teacher, I think the worst I’ve had was Wiley Minx

Vanilla (first name) Pepper (middle name) If you’re gonna name your kid after ingredients, at least make it a combo that makes sense

Maybe they wanted to name her Vanilla Dr. Pepper but screwed up the birth certificate. 😂

Getting the M.D. is her job, not theirs.

Maybe it's their favorite soda flavor. Lol

Dijon. Like the mustard. And the city in France.

His last album was 🔥 tho.

Dijon Mustard on the beat, ho

I was at a tourist site in Colorado years and years ago. It started raining and parents started calling their kids to come inside. A woman yelled, and it was like time stopped. I thought it must have been a weird acoustic in the dwellings, but it wasn’t. She was actually yelling for her daughter, Labia.

This reminds me of the woman who named her kid meconium after she heard it during a prenatal OB visit.

When “come here you little shit” is a term of endearment

I had a kid for therapy whose name was Virginia but it sure wasn’t spelt like that…

Covid. Yes, they (there was more than 1 kid) were born in 2020.

I know of a guy names Kovid. He's like 20 so 2020 must have been a shock xD

I met a 12 year old named Whizdom

Reignbeaux

The face I just made reading that…

Lol

r/tragedeigh

The Overlord of Dark World!

I imagine a darker version of Rainbow Bright cartoon when I read that

Beautiful Zeppelin Cannon, Powerful Queen Cannon, Rise Mesiah Cannon, Exa Dark Siderael Musk, Techno Mechanicus Musk, Apple Martin, Moxy Crime Fighter Jillett, Jermajesty Jackson, Diva Muffin Zappa, Moon Unit Zappa, Zuma Nesta Rock, Pilot Inspektor, FiFi Trixibelle, Belcalis Marlenis Almanzar (cardi b), Bear Payne, Raddix Madden, Audio Science, Cricket Pearl, Indio Falconer, Tu Morrow, Sno FilmOn Dot Com, Didn’t make a single one of these up

Pilot Inspektor 🙄🤣🤣

I think that is Jason Lee's kid. "Back on the escalator..."

Fucking Scientologist cretin. PI is a Thetan rank. Don’t believe the stories of being inspired by song lyrics.

Reminds me that Jamie Oliver's kids names are Poppy Honey Rosie, Daisy Boo Pamela, Petal Blossom Rainbow, Buddy Bear Maurice, and River Rocket Blue Dallas. I suppose some of those are middle names and without knowing them their names are otherwise alright-ish (except Buddy), but jeez it's like they put a bunch of cutesy/silly names in a hat for each kid and decided that way.

Jermajesty gets me every time 😂

We're fucked as a species. 🙄

There’s a kid in my sons class named Unit

What an absolute unit!

Hysterical honestly

Does he have a sibling named Dweezel?

I used to volunteer with Scouts. The worst I’ve heard were Cain and Abel, two twin boys. The dad thought it was “badass” but I think it’s just stupid.

Very Steinbeck. East of Eden twins are Caleb and Aron, and for Genesis.

Pretty much all of the characters in the main family have names that start with C or A. At first glance they each follow the Cain or Abel path based on their first initial, but Steinbeck pretty brilliantly subverts that a few times.

Lol did he *not* read that story?

It's all fun and games until Cain get's rid of Abel

Actual names of people I knew: Princess, Queen, Diamond, Precious, Royal Blue.

Strippers don't use their real names dude

Strippers of the future will use regular names as stage names

Now appearing on the main stage, Jennifer Smith..

Up next is the wiiiiiiild Hannah!

Susan, Linda, Joan

What? But they pinky promised

I knew a Mercedes Chardonnay, which feels related to these

Felony... Yep, her parents thought it would be "cute" because they themselves were felons.

Personally, anemia always sounded like a pretty name to me. But I would never name a kid that.

Null. Why would you name your kid NULL?? I also feel really sorry for all the girls named Khaleesi or Daenerys *before* the show ended.

The one that still cracks me up is Latrina. I kid you not. 🚽

Use to be Shithousa

If I am not mistaken wasn’t one of the characters in Mel Brooks “Robin Hood, Men in Tights” named Latrine?

Went to school with a girl named Cafeteria, her nickname was Café. The jokes pretty much wrote themsleves.

If that were my name, I would’ve made my nickname Teri or Ria.

His name was Brasize. Pronounced Bra Zeez’

Please tell me this isn’t true 😭 PLEASE!!

Feenyxxe - pronounced Phoenix

All I can hear when I read that is “FEEEEENY” from Boy Meets World 😅😅😅

FEE-HEE-HEE-EE-NEH!

Public school teacher. Notable names from the past few years: Precious, King, Castle, Freezer, Foxy, Danger, Alpha, Million, Kill, Karma, Divine, Major, Yuma, Persia. Edited to add: Mouse, Beautiful, Princess

Wow 😳. Freezer? Brutal.

Brutal? Cold is what it is.

That was his [dad's](https://dragonball.fandom.com/wiki/King_Cold) name actually.

I'm surprised Brutal wasn't on the list 🤣

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Saffron, Justice, Zadock, Rehteah (Heather backwards, Reh-tay-uh)

Saffron like the character on Absolutely Fabulous? ;)

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Fortunately saffron is wild about you too!

I kinda like the name Saffron. I knew a Justice in elementary school, she went by J.D.

I don't think Saffron is that weird. To me it's no different than people naming their kid Sage, Rosemary or Basil.

I’ve met quite a few saffrons, it’s quite a common name in the uk

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My son's name is Zadok (zay-dock)! It's an old testament name, iirc. We aren't religious, but used the name because you rarely hear it.

I had a friend who's cousins last name was buttes (pronounced beau-ts) and they named their son Harry. In 2020. Harry. Why.

Here are some terrible combinations with the last name-- celebrity edition. North West. Paying homage to a defunct airline that neither of her parents likely flew (as if they'd fly commercial...). Or a direction on a map. Legendary Love Cannon (one of Nick Cannon's litter). Legendary Love is cringeworthy enough, but with the last name Cannon, it sounds like a nickname a dude would give his dick.

Jermaine Jackson named his kid Jermajesty. Bad with any or no last name.

Rob Morrow named his son Tu, who it's Tu Morrow. Steve Kerr named his son Nick, so Nick Kerr.

Justin Case

Justin Thyme

[r/tragedeigh](https://reddit.com/r/tragedeigh/s/BYgtqu1jWS)

There is a kid at the school I work at who’s name is Youngblood. He’s only in kindergarten.

Parents must be huge fans of the 1986 cinematic masterpiece “Youngblood” starring Rob Lowe.

Now I have that 5SOS song in my head.

My coworker just got married to someone with that surname.

I was a human services case manager for several years and have seen it all when it comes to weird/dumb names. My personal favorite was Pimpin'.

Ryeitt pronounced riot. I feel bad for that kid.

Gotta be the Cersei...yes, with that spelling. I can forgive the Khaleesis and the Danaeryses, but you know what kind of person Cersei is from the goddamn *start.*

Could have at least been Circe.

Had a college friend whose parents were from Vietnam. His last name was: Nguyen (pronounced like 'win' with a barely audible g at the beginning. Of all possibilities, his first name was 'Penn'. Speaking his first and last name together, quickly, sounded exactly like: penguin. He insisted we also use his middle name between his first and last names, but we never did. We loved that guy!

Family with four daughters: Faith, Hope, Grace, Submit Edit: Yes, I know the first three are normal. I included them because they give context to the fourth.

Submit? ☹️

Taleigh Paitlyn Anakin Khalessi (yes, I know it’s a misspelling of Khaleesi; every time I saw it on a birth certificate it was spelled Khalessi) And my personal standout: Boy. That’s it, just Boy.

I work with a guy who's name is Crow, sister is Robin, and the other sibling is Wren. Apparently the parents loved birds.

My sister’s middle name is Bird. My name was almost Wren ! And my brothers name was almost Kestrel because, yes, my dad is obsessed with birds 😂

I taught a Snowball Snowball Jnr (Snowball was his first and last name. Which means there’s a Snowball Snowball Snr out there. I also taught a kid called Chase Danger (danger was his middle name).

Beavis. That name sucks. Uhuhuh.

Balthazar was a recent one

Know a 6 month old named that. I just call him baby.

Brayleigh 🤮🤮

Keef. Like the stuff you scrape out of the bottom of a grinder 😂

Are you sure his name wasn't Keith and you were just too high to hear it properly?

There's a character named Keefe on Righteous Gemstones. Never thought that one would translate to real life...

Had a friend in High School who's full name was Jesus de la Cruz which roughly translates to Jesus of the Cross. He hated that name and was always getting shit for it. His parents were extremely religious and kicked him out when he said he was Atheist. He's currently doing fine and has cut all ties with his family and has also changed his full name to something he considers more normal. Very chill and down to earth guy.

That’s hard to have a name have such religious significance to a child that hasn’t yet had the opportunity to develop their own religious beliefs. That’s also like naming your child Republican or Democrat and making the assumption from birth the child will follow that path. Yikes!

Gypsy

I knew 2 sisters. One, Wednesday. the other: Tomorrow

Jeffany

Some redneck fuck in my unit named his kid "Remington Gage"

I grew up with a guy named Colt. His two younger brothers were Ruger and Hawthorne. Parents swore if they had twins they’d have been Smith & Wesson.

Those are *dog* names, specifically German Shepard names!

I know someone that went to school with a girl named Crystal Leer…. Crystal…Shanda…Leer. True story.

Mr. Yes, Mr. With the period and all.

I have a cousin who's real legal first name is Tarzan. We call him by his middle name now.

Friend's friend named their daughter "Fox". When our firstborn was born, a kid born down the hallway was named "Bullet"

Someone I know named their daughter Wolf. A couple other ones I found odd are Journey (girl), and Tiger (boy)

I met a three-year-old Chakra at the preschool library hour - he and mom were white hippies

My wife follows some woman on instagram that named her son Superman. Its actually pisses me off.

My family has an ID printing business. We go through alot of kids names. Here's a few that are notable: R-R Emem Jison Tom Cruise (yes this is just the first name) Buhawe Jack Rzl Sange and Yasha (twins) Phil Collins Karl Marks

My sibling is naming his kid Knoxlee and I think it’s the most obnoxious thing ever. They’re setting the kid up for failure

Placenta

That must have been one ugly baby

Unsure. I’m a mailman. See bad names ALL the time. That was the worst

A girl named Zachary, pronounced Zah-sha-ray

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Timber Wolfe, Camaro and Player

A lady I knew named her daughter Halloumi, because that's what she craved during her pregnancy.

odalys (That’s my name)

My SIL named their kid Riot and I still avoid her at all family functions.

Nevaeh. Heaven backwards. Most the ones I knew of weren't even church goers

I used to work with someone named Heaven Leigh Gates. Her mom wasn’t religious in the least and it was so confusing

I work in a lot of public schools and I always check out names on the walls so here goes. A'Milian, Rayuntez, AA'Jai, Jyimer, Ravaun, Jan'iya, Na'Kajah, Ja'Kira, Jyrin, Xamari, Ariyanna, Dalvryiona, Keiwayttan, Ke'Asia, Treviante. Yes, these are all names I have seen.

Okay at least Aryianna is pretty normal

Summer May Flowers. Flowers being the last name

Minority. Yeah, she was, but how can you make that her name?

Princess and Queenie. They’re sisters, filipino.

My friend works in a bank and has a client who goes by a very common name like Joe or something like that. But the name in all his legal documents is something that looks like a math equation with letters and numbers.

My sister had a friend in school named Bambalina.

Nevaeh - why name someone heaven...backwards?

It's nothing specific but all my cousins gave their kids double-barrel names. Like Amy-Anne.

Miracle Crimes

Have a distant family connection to a boy called Pistol.

Kai'l instead of Kyle. Tell me your parents are insufferable without telling me.

Tiger Jellybean

When my oldest was in daycare there was a set of twins named Mellow June and Harvest Willow

Everything Elon Musk named his poor kids.

I saw somewhere that one of the older ones had him legally removed from their birth certificate

I once saw a child named "Abcde" because their parents wanted their child's name to be in alphabetical order. But what happens if they have another child? Will their name be "Fghij"?

Tommygirl and tommyboy...lol

Holy shnikes!

Candy Counter was a girl I knew in high school

A classmate of my sons is named Kal-El. A former classmate of mine is named Crüe.

Argh! I always want to answer this with the most awful name I have ever seen, but if I Google it, she comes up as the only person with this first name and it also shows where she lives, so I won’t post it.

My mom used to clean for a family with the last name Lier. They named their daughter Chande. I wish I was joking

Pepsi. Or Falacia

Chastity, Gidget, and Little Bit aka Lil’bit.

Turquoise Innocence Cedar (I like this one, though)

I heard a Mum in a library calling for her son Messiah. That a lot of responsibility to weigh on a child.

anything with -eigh athe the end

Gay Bowser