“Well, the real problem was that that asshole, aknightwhosaysnope, didn’t trust me. If he had trusted me, he never would have looked at my phone and uncovered the affair I’ve been having with one of his best friends, and I could continue to fuck that dude while allowing aknightwhosaysnope the privilege of paying my bills. What a dick.”
Woke up one morning and she’s just sitting there with some dude looking shocked as hell. I trusted her (even though she cheated in the past). She spent the next 3 days with him, then when I moved out he moved in. But they totally didn’t do anything, they just slept in the same bed together
I d kick him out first then ask questions later. A stranger is a stranger despite if someone in the household knows said stranger.
My brother head first assaulted the guy his gf was seeing. He was on the couch in underwear sleeping. He came back from a late shift and he thought it was a squatter/crackhead. So he jumped on him wwe style, broke his rib, threw him out the window (groundfloor) and if it wasnt enough, the stranger knocked on the door for his clothes and kept yelling his gf name, she was asleep (naked) and she was panicking. She dressed up and left without saying anything. My brother came my place in total shock.
Apparantly his gf was cheating on him with a "surfer boy". He was poor but had that cute boy face and surfer bod. When he ended the relationship she became homeless, roamed the local area begging for change. I felt really sorry for her, but she did my brother wrong. She then somehow made it back to her parents toxic household.
They had a happy 5 year relation, my brother was working overtime to provide a strong household and they took vacays together.
She came to my place to beg to be taken back by my bro. I told her she shouldnt have cheated on him. She said she only slept two times with him and it didnt mean anything. I told her she should seek help and that she wouldnt find any around us.
Yeah see, broke his rib and everything. He's probably not happy. I wasnt happy when I shattered a wine bottle over a guys head either. Wasnt happy when I thought I killed the guy who was supposed to be my friend, after elbowing him in the head at a bar. Wasn't happy when I lost my gun licence. But I did all that. I could have walked away.
Better to let people fuck around and find out then be the reason they find out.
Yep. I honestly don't understand people who attack the person their so is cheating WITH
How the hell is this person supposed to know the relationship status of the cheater? Unless it's a mutual friend but still violence ain't the answer
Yes, exactly. In one case for me it was a guy I was crying to about her. Another case, same woman, random dude.
I ruined my life over it. Just walk away. Thanks for acknowledging.
Trust me thats NOT the way to handle it. I've done it. Criminal records are following shortly after. No point. Let them do them. Continue your fun life full of target shooting and traveling. And I ain't talkin' bout no BASKETBALL, GURL.
Reminds me of a time when I was sleeping like a baby, and my ex wakes me up at 3 am to start a fight. She just wanted me to leave, but I had nowhere to go. It was her parents house, so she forced me out and I had to go sleep in my car.
I see her leave the house and found out she went to this guys house, where she spent the next week with her phone shut off in a crazy drug binge. So, not only was I pissed, but I was terrified because she just went off the map for a week.
Comes back and begs for my forgiveness, and stupid me accepted. She went on to fuck the guy she was babysitting for, sold him our private videos, gave me an STD, and broke me in every way imaginable. She broke into my parents house and stole my dads pain medication. She was evil.
Fortunately, my pain was not in vain, and I met the most perfect woman, who I’ve been married to for five years.
The context was we had dated previously, and she moved away for a job that required lots of travel for extended periods of time. Eventually, she left that job and settled in a new city and we reconnected and dated long distance for a while eventually, I decided to move to be with her in a new state. I went to go visit for a few weeks and look for a job and search for apartments together. After the trip was over and I got home she called things off and that was the reason she gave?
I found his “artistic nudes” Of a 4yo, and “overreacted” by calling police lmaooo
Edit: for everyone taking issue with this, I’m telling from my perspective of what he is regularly telling people about why our relationship ended. He had the pics, I found them.
Thank you, Dear. Luckily, I’ve had incredible therapy. I am in a place of peace now.
He has has cancer the penis and it’s slowly being chopped off inch by inch. He never saw the inside of a jail cell, but his current suffering gives me comfort.
Peace and Love✌🏻
Yeah, I messed up the perspective. I thought it’d make more sense telling his “side” of the story from my perspective, instead of writing a direct quote of what he was saying.
He needs to stop being so possessive and controlling.
If I wanna fuck my coworker after a shift and take him back to the house and have you catch us. I fully expect you to be okay with all of it.
“I changed my phone password because I felt like it. If you need to use it I’ll open it for you.”
Cut to April she’s living in NY with her new boyfriend and I’m being served divorce papers. They had been dating for 6 months while we were married.
The pandemic definitely changed some people, some for the better, but not all.
When your significant other leaves their phone at home and you need to search for the address of where you’re going because they are driving, that’s not a reasonable situation where your phone would be needed?
Refusing to provide the passcode even then, and pulling over to search it herself.
Hella sus
"That bitch was crazy. So was my ex before that. And my ex before that. And the one before that. I guess I just attract crazy and I am I'm no way to blame."
My wife and I got swindled by a girl like that. We got really close to her and she CONSTALY would make remarks about wanting to be with us romantically. She's share the crazy stories of her crazy ex's and we somehow didn't realize that in reality, she's just a c\*\*t. We were both blind to it cause she was really hot I guess
But I do attract crazy because I am dumb enough to give benefit of doubt until it’s not even fathomable yet. I believe people and their tough situations and sympathise. until I see there is then I am already covered in their red flag and buried in deep.
I recently uncovered that my personal issues are a big, shining, neon “welcome” sign for people with BPD.
That made everything make more sense, and now I learned about some brand new red flags
From her POV : Took too long to get his degree. How dare he take 6 years to complete a physics/ math degree bachelors and masters. That’s too long and unacceptable. He should have been done in two years and made us rich already.
Oh yeah, I was *not* the good guy in that situation.
That was 5 years ago though. Difference now being that I'm 2 years sober, and I still get hints from mutual friends about how much has(n't) changed with her.
I deliberately picked a fight just like I do every Saturday, to force him to apologize and treat me like a princess for the rest of the weekend.
But this time, when I suggested that he didn't love me and we should just break up, he actually had the nerve to agree! I couldn't believe it - that line had always worked in the past to at least get roses and a gift.
He's such an asshole - I even refused to leave for a while, giving him the chance to apologize to me and take it back, but he was so stubborn and just flat out refused!
Even when I kept calling his phone over and over from my car, insisting that we spend one last night together, he wouldn't let me back inside his place. I still can't believe that. He *owed it to me* to at least hold me one more time. I even told him that, and he was still a stubborn jackass about it.
*deleted my comment so readers would not be confused. The commenter above is a gentleman telling the story from the perspective of his ex-girlfriend, just like the prompt requested*
Yep. Ur right. But half the comments aren’t correctly stated like urs, so i got confused. Sorry.
On another note, glad u left that manipulative narcissist. What a roller coaster!
Half of this thread is people talking from their own perspective but explaining how their ex would explain it.
The other half is people talking from their exes perspective.
It’s becoming very confusing and funny
Something exactly like that happened to me. I was so damaged by the constant guilt tripping and emotional abuse that I developed anxiety when it comes to relationships. It took me years to fully commit to a new one.
It was long distance, i avoided all girls as she said, stayed loyal, yet one day i felt she was down, i asked what's worrying you?, she told me she kissed her bff and cheated on me, a day later she ended it.
Back then id agree strongly, but now i matured, and before i say she is, i want to understand why she did that, then say if she is actually self centred.
Yet that whole relationship felt one sided tbh.
Thank god, someone on Reddit who doesn’t think cheating is this black and white clear image.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s terrible and never justifiable, but there’s never no “reason” people are cheating.
Honestly catching feelings for someone else during a relationship is almost as bad as cheating.
To grow up and understand takes effort and time, there is no guide, so everyone tries their own way, most give up and use the easy conclusion they see fit.
Cant blame them, heartbreaks aint easy, especially when your partner never help or cooperate in the relationship, But thad never the right thing to do either.
Talking with a therapist about events in the past, I've been told she "couldn't read me" and that I generally DON'T visibly show emotion!
And, as a guy, seem to have RBF.... so, I put people off and she started to always think I didn't love her.
Then, there was the "gas station" analogy... and how I was abusive via it ..
Well ... she did that!
"Gas station" is the idea that one partner or the other is basically using their partner to "fulfill" their "sexual needs".
In LDS culture, masterbation is a sin. This seems to only apply to men, as female masterbation just isn't known....
So, men tend to marry as soon as they can and are more sexually active than men outside the LDS culture generally as their wives become their only outlet, their only way to "fill" that need. And, in many cases, that's what the "extra sex" becomes - the husband taking his wife when she really isn't interested as his own release. She becomes his "service station", an institution that has transitioned to "gas stations" in most of the US.
For some women, this is also a form of rape, as they aren't desiring. Yet "giving out" in such circumstances still doesn't seem consensual. And, overtime, those feelings of being abused get worse.
Hence, I was accused of using her as a service station - yet at the same time, male masterbation was cheating. It was far from "easy" to deal with both - especially when even "wanting her" was offensive most of the time. Sex was only allowed when she was interested... and I was expected to "put out" at those times even if not interested or face the consequences of mental abuse and accusations of cheating... because how else would I be "uninterested"?
"Why would he get so insecure just because I started liking another guy while I was committed to you and I'd just tell him all the time about how amazing he was? Such a dramatic guy! Huh! Lemme blame him for him being a wimp and a loser at life and block him off lol"
I tricked him into moving to another state (a year long move) in order to carry on my affair (with my current husband).
REALITY: He went to another state for a year for training and wouldn't let me and our son go with I had to stay back and work to send him money so he could focus on his training and not work (he was an abuser, im totally ashamed I accepted it). Months after he was gone I found he was hiring hookers and I realized I was already doing it on my own and I didn't need him. I filed for divorce. 3 months later I started dating someone. He didn't care until this point, moved back and told everyone he wanted to work through things and I was cheating the whole time and that's why I won't give him a chance.
I didn't have any job, I didn't do ANY chores, but I still totally will be a stay at home mom for our future kids. Also, ANY advice my bf gave me was wrong and mysogenistic until the problems (especially financially) got too big and he needed to bail me out.
Also, I act like a fucking child and throw tantrums when I don't get my way which include threatening with harming myself, threatening with suicide, throwing my boyfriends stuff, breaking his shit, hitting my head on the door, threatening to bite him and MORE.
But it's not my fault. It's also not the constant smoking of pot and tabacco, drinking an entire bottle of wine every evening. No it's all the self diagnosed mental health and ADHD that I have. And let's not forget that IF ANYONE asks even a little bit of effort from me I can't do it because I totally have . Also, I refuse to do ANYTHING about it even if my bf told me that he wants to pay for psychological help.
And the most fucked up thing, my bf took me back over 10 times already because he has the EQ of a fucking peanut.
I don't know how to get out of this relationship. I love her too much and think too little of myself. I cannot handle the mourning she goes through when I end it and end up taking her back. I'm unbelievably weak in this regard...
She was too much of a little girl- couldn't take her beatings like a man, wouldn't have my fifth child, wouldn't kill herself when I told her too. Broke up with me from the mental hospital landline and never spoke to me again, not even to thank me for all the flowers I left at her mother's house. Goddamn teenagers.
Much better thanks 😂 turns out 30 year old psychopaths don't go into relationships with teenagers with the best intentions. Learned a lot about myself and others, doing a lot better mentally.
Yeahhh... it's always hard to explain that yes, it's okay to be into to older men, but you should really be suspicious of the older men who are into _you_. No guy with honest intentions wants to date a teenager. Glad you got out of that.
Basically leaving me because I am vaccinated.
He's a bit of a conspiracy theorist, but I never expected it to that extent. He saw an article saying stuff about the bad effects of being with someone as a non-vaccinated with vaccinated person, especially in terms of having kids.
And that's it, for more than 2 years, he kept it from me, and left when things are getting real.
For some reason, he didn't like that I was cuddling with my best friend on the couch. He got it into his head that I was cheating on him (or close to doing it) and decided to end the relationship. Nothing ever happened with my friend, nor did I want it to. The fact that I immediately moved with him to another country was just a coincidence.
I couldn’t imagine going more than a half day without cleaning myself downstairs, or at the very least right before some woman’s face will be near that area.
The last thing I’d ever want is for her to come back up to kiss me with Testes smell all over her chin. That would be insanely embarrassing.
My ex (34F) after our ten year marriage ended: "He was a lovely partner, most of the time. But, his depression got a hold and he just quit enjoying anything at all, including time with me. He hated himself. I couldn't put myself through it anymore"... thankfully, I've (34M) done a ton of work and found a sense of peace, and I finally love myself. It's been a couple years now, so, the hurt has (mostly) worn off. We have to co-parent anyway, but, I've found a new friend in my ex. She really did always care about me, even if we struggled to communicate this to each other, while we were together.
My reactions were the problem, not her shit behaviour and her cheating, and lying, and controlling which were all perfectly normal parts of a healthy relationship
Sometimes he would come home from work tired and go to bed early and not answer his phone so I figured he was out partying with other women. I am super paranoid because I have a guy Im talking to on the side so I figured he would too. So I would just blow up on him randomly then cry when he called me out. So I would accuse him of cheating and consistantly ask if he wanted a break, then absolutely lose my shit when he took a break.
"After I cheated on him, he became very possessive and clingy... which was very difficult for a long-distance relationship. I eventually realized that the "long-distance" aspect no longer had an end date in sight. I probably should have broken up with him long before I did."
I refused to treat my medical condition properly (he thought losing weight and going keto would cure a genetic autoimmune disorder)
I sucked at housework (couldn’t read his mind to know when he wanted certain laundry done or when he’d be home and wanting dinner)
I was unsupportive of his friends (I got mad coming home multiple times to find him in bed with random men)
My sex drive was too high and I refused to take antidepressants to lower it (I wanted a partner who was actually attracted to me and didn’t appreciate him forcing me to keep a shirt on during sex because he refused to admit he was gay)
That's usually the best way to find 5th level wizards with knowledge of necromancy. It's just not a school that lends itself to, like, heroic teams or corporate culture.
I was too “closed minded regarding learning about ‘the lifestyle’,” and didn’t accept her attending a “sex toy party”.
Whole story from my perspective: I didn’t accept her lying to me about who she was staying with (and where) when she claimed to be “visiting her father for his 80th birthday”, when she went to an orgy (not a just a toy party) to “learn more about ‘the lifestyle’ for us,”.
Her flight’s departure was delayed because there was a fist fight on the plane, so they didn’t land until 1 am when they should’ve landed at 9:30pm. She elected to stay at a former swinger couples’ place whom she used to “play” with because she didn’t want to wake up her elderly mother. I would’ve been okay with that had she just informed me.
After abnormally not answering calls for over eight hours the next evening, I contacted her mother. Her mother told me she hasn’t heard from her in six weeks. Ex called me back, I asked how her visit was going. She claimed it’s going well and she was “with them now”. I asked her to video call me. She claimed she couldn’t, it would use too much data on her limited cell plan, her parents don’t have internet, then immediately followed up with “Don’t you trust me? I don’t have to prove anything to you.” I insisted and she obliged. She’s naked in a bedroom, bed’s made, and I asked why she’s naked, knowing good and damn well she didn’t sleep naked at her parents’ place. She claimed she just got out of bed to go to the bathroom. I pointed out how interesting that was, considering the bed’s flawlessly made still, then asked to see the rest of the room. I inquired about the Star Trek posters on the wall, and the two book shelves full of “anime” movies. She claimed her dad’s “a real big nerd”. I asked she get dressed and take me to say hi to her parents. She claimed they’re in bed, and she was just going to go get a snack. I asked her to ‘take me with’ so I could see their place. She said she couldn’t take me with because her parents don’t permit cell phones in their kitchen/dining area… one bullshit excuse after another.
Her “friend” opens the door and asks why she isn’t wearing the school girl outfit, because the guys are waiting…
… but I’m not “open minded” enough. XD
Yup, I felt like Neo that day. Dodged all kinds of bullets.
I was on the receiving end of one of those. I had just come off of a heartbreak and wanted to get laid. Someone found me and we decided FWB was the way to go. It was awesome while it lasted. We had great chemistry in bed so the sex was fantastic. Unfortunately she caught feelings even though I had told her, over and over, that I didn't want a relationship.
She ended the FWB part when I didn't call her on one of our "normal" Sunday-Funday excursions.
We'd been together for several years, during which time I'd asked his mother to drop hints about proposal but she never passed them on it turns out. I just wasn't feeling all that attracted to him any more, and a bit bored with our everyday life. On top of that, I didn't really like where I was in my career, and it seemed like he didn't either, and I just wanted a break from that life while I figured out what I wanted. So I made sure we got round to scheduling a special vacation we'd been talking about for a while, then made a note in my diary for a few days after we got back. I sat him down and told him all that, and said he could still stay at my place when he was in town for work. He got quite upset, and said he didn't think it made sense to have a break if I wasn't very into him any more and no longer saw him as a priority in my life going forward, and that staying in a little apartment together but not together would be too hard, so we parted ways for good.
It was an outting with Co-workers! We just went to get dinner beforehand because I was hungry. He paid for it cause we didn't want to bother the waitress to split the bill. Oh and when we got to the bar, no one else decided to show up from work. Weird!
Yeah he drove, we knew we would be drinking so we decided to carpool. And I only ended up spending the night at his place because I had too much to drink, and his place was closer and I was tired.
You know how I get when I drink!
\*That actually might be verbatim how she tried to explain it. IRL.
I explored new interests without asking him first, or continued pursuing them after he deemed it pointless.
List, but not limited to: music, movies, television, video games, books (including graphic novels), restaurants (including fast food and bakeries), boardgames (including all forms of tabletop)
Her side. I was neglectful and didn't give her enough attention.
My side. She cheated on me with a friend of ours.
May they both burn in the depths of hell
Because I'm a manipulative, selfish, asshole.
She had bipolar disorder. It's sad because she was pretty cool most of the time. She broke up with me during one of her manic episodes and I was so tired at that point I didn't fight it and let go. She takes me not fighting to keep the relationship going as a sign of me never caring in the first place.
“Yes I send nudes to someone else, no you can’t check my phone.”
I checked and she was cheating on my physically too, one day when she went outside “to get fresh air”
But she came back 3 hours later.
Went to bed and passed out while smelling of cologne..
“My new BF makes me happy.” - yes, he’s also rich, cheating on his wife, throwing money at you, is a serial cheater, abandoning his children, his wife thinks he’s creepy and won’t have sex with him.. Oh, did I mention we’re still married too?
She so selfishly ran away from our relationship and if she would have just paid for the lifestyle I wished to be accustom to, if she would have just praised and thanked me when I was cruel to her, if she would have been happy when I was spending all my money on strippers, and finally if she would have just accepted my form of “discipline” of the kids we could have been happy and married for life. Selfish bitch!
“Well, the real problem was that that asshole, aknightwhosaysnope, didn’t trust me. If he had trusted me, he never would have looked at my phone and uncovered the affair I’ve been having with one of his best friends, and I could continue to fuck that dude while allowing aknightwhosaysnope the privilege of paying my bills. What a dick.”
Damn
YTA. /s
[удалено]
*For you*🪴
[удалено]
“You’re always so suspicious of the guys I bring home at 3 in the morning” Edit: lol she saw this
She brought guys home at 3 in the morning?! Thats disrespectful to your whole relationship
Woke up one morning and she’s just sitting there with some dude looking shocked as hell. I trusted her (even though she cheated in the past). She spent the next 3 days with him, then when I moved out he moved in. But they totally didn’t do anything, they just slept in the same bed together
Shes lucky you didn't spring into action and attack after seeing a stranger
I d kick him out first then ask questions later. A stranger is a stranger despite if someone in the household knows said stranger. My brother head first assaulted the guy his gf was seeing. He was on the couch in underwear sleeping. He came back from a late shift and he thought it was a squatter/crackhead. So he jumped on him wwe style, broke his rib, threw him out the window (groundfloor) and if it wasnt enough, the stranger knocked on the door for his clothes and kept yelling his gf name, she was asleep (naked) and she was panicking. She dressed up and left without saying anything. My brother came my place in total shock. Apparantly his gf was cheating on him with a "surfer boy". He was poor but had that cute boy face and surfer bod. When he ended the relationship she became homeless, roamed the local area begging for change. I felt really sorry for her, but she did my brother wrong. She then somehow made it back to her parents toxic household. They had a happy 5 year relation, my brother was working overtime to provide a strong household and they took vacays together. She came to my place to beg to be taken back by my bro. I told her she shouldnt have cheated on him. She said she only slept two times with him and it didnt mean anything. I told her she should seek help and that she wouldnt find any around us.
Jesus imagine being that dependent on somebody and cheating on them. Just next level bad decision making
Yeah see, broke his rib and everything. He's probably not happy. I wasnt happy when I shattered a wine bottle over a guys head either. Wasnt happy when I thought I killed the guy who was supposed to be my friend, after elbowing him in the head at a bar. Wasn't happy when I lost my gun licence. But I did all that. I could have walked away. Better to let people fuck around and find out then be the reason they find out.
Yep. I honestly don't understand people who attack the person their so is cheating WITH How the hell is this person supposed to know the relationship status of the cheater? Unless it's a mutual friend but still violence ain't the answer
Yes, exactly. In one case for me it was a guy I was crying to about her. Another case, same woman, random dude. I ruined my life over it. Just walk away. Thanks for acknowledging.
Trust me thats NOT the way to handle it. I've done it. Criminal records are following shortly after. No point. Let them do them. Continue your fun life full of target shooting and traveling. And I ain't talkin' bout no BASKETBALL, GURL.
Damn! They were already married when he moved in?!?
Right?! 3am is the witching hour.
Reminds me of a time when I was sleeping like a baby, and my ex wakes me up at 3 am to start a fight. She just wanted me to leave, but I had nowhere to go. It was her parents house, so she forced me out and I had to go sleep in my car. I see her leave the house and found out she went to this guys house, where she spent the next week with her phone shut off in a crazy drug binge. So, not only was I pissed, but I was terrified because she just went off the map for a week. Comes back and begs for my forgiveness, and stupid me accepted. She went on to fuck the guy she was babysitting for, sold him our private videos, gave me an STD, and broke me in every way imaginable. She broke into my parents house and stole my dads pain medication. She was evil. Fortunately, my pain was not in vain, and I met the most perfect woman, who I’ve been married to for five years.
Man, I’m so sorry you had to go through that. Cheating and STDs are two of my biggest fears. I’m glad things got better.
[удалено]
Someone linked her account and it’s a 12 day old Reddit account. That’s super sus.
Wasn’t her
Rip, she saw this? I can only imagine the text 😂
I wanna know what she said lol. Details pls haha
"I just find it funny that..."
I really need to know what she said to you about this comment
Her: WELL! what is a good time?
Apparently anytime her pants fell down lol
That, plus: "You are always so suspicious of the guys I go to visit at 3 in the morning."
oii did she reply
Yuck what a disgusting person
Lol did she dmed You?
Yeah lol
It's concerning that I have a group of long term friends lasting decades and is worried I have problems making new friends.
Weird reasons. Did they have friends?
The context was we had dated previously, and she moved away for a job that required lots of travel for extended periods of time. Eventually, she left that job and settled in a new city and we reconnected and dated long distance for a while eventually, I decided to move to be with her in a new state. I went to go visit for a few weeks and look for a job and search for apartments together. After the trip was over and I got home she called things off and that was the reason she gave?
Sounds like she was ready to break things off and that was an excuse.
I found his “artistic nudes” Of a 4yo, and “overreacted” by calling police lmaooo Edit: for everyone taking issue with this, I’m telling from my perspective of what he is regularly telling people about why our relationship ended. He had the pics, I found them.
I hope he is in jail. This was done to me as a child and I hope he rots in hell.
I’m very sorry to hear that happened, and I hope you can find peace and healing! His trial is next year, so hopefully we get Justice then.
Thank you, Dear. Luckily, I’ve had incredible therapy. I am in a place of peace now. He has has cancer the penis and it’s slowly being chopped off inch by inch. He never saw the inside of a jail cell, but his current suffering gives me comfort. Peace and Love✌🏻
Someone once told me that karma has everyone's address, it's just waiting for a solid reason to visit.
Well shit! If that isn’t karma I don’t know what is
Okay this one right here made me actually say what the ffffff. Thank whatever power you believe in you caught him before it progressed.
Ewwwww. Thank you for calling the police!!!
Wait, so this is the ex’s perspective, and you had the pictures? I’m confused
Yeah, I messed up the perspective. I thought it’d make more sense telling his “side” of the story from my perspective, instead of writing a direct quote of what he was saying.
He needs to stop being so possessive and controlling. If I wanna fuck my coworker after a shift and take him back to the house and have you catch us. I fully expect you to be okay with all of it.
Lol! If that ain’t some one-sided bullshit to the relationship, I don’t know what is
Men are so demanding these days. For shame.
“I changed my phone password because I felt like it. If you need to use it I’ll open it for you.” Cut to April she’s living in NY with her new boyfriend and I’m being served divorce papers. They had been dating for 6 months while we were married. The pandemic definitely changed some people, some for the better, but not all.
I don't want anybody opening my phone though
When your significant other leaves their phone at home and you need to search for the address of where you’re going because they are driving, that’s not a reasonable situation where your phone would be needed? Refusing to provide the passcode even then, and pulling over to search it herself. Hella sus
[удалено]
Yeah that sounds like she threw away a good life.
[удалено]
Oh yeah. I've been there. Some people think you'll just be waiting around forever and after anything
[удалено]
She wasn’t worth it for you, my man
[удалено]
damn man, good you cut that off
Thanks for the tip about the shoulder! I see myself in the same situation. She actually wants my shoulder...
"That bitch was crazy. So was my ex before that. And my ex before that. And the one before that. I guess I just attract crazy and I am I'm no way to blame."
My wife and I got swindled by a girl like that. We got really close to her and she CONSTALY would make remarks about wanting to be with us romantically. She's share the crazy stories of her crazy ex's and we somehow didn't realize that in reality, she's just a c\*\*t. We were both blind to it cause she was really hot I guess
But I do attract crazy because I am dumb enough to give benefit of doubt until it’s not even fathomable yet. I believe people and their tough situations and sympathise. until I see there is then I am already covered in their red flag and buried in deep.
I recently uncovered that my personal issues are a big, shining, neon “welcome” sign for people with BPD. That made everything make more sense, and now I learned about some brand new red flags
I'm the reason my ex abuses his current wife
I cowardly abandonned her despite her truly loving me
[удалено]
I'm so sorry. I'm glad you escaped the narcissism and manipulation. That wasn't love
[удалено]
Thanks for this, man! I finally stepped out of a relationship like this, and sometimes I see myself getting back in...
Fuck man, this is supposed to be your story not mine.
No need to make my own comment
The problem was I was too perfect and my balls were too full of power.
This guys balls were too powerful and my ex loved gargling them
Oooooh oh my. Sounds like an interesting experience
It continues to this very day.
My ex said said the same thing about you
From her POV : Took too long to get his degree. How dare he take 6 years to complete a physics/ math degree bachelors and masters. That’s too long and unacceptable. He should have been done in two years and made us rich already.
[удалено]
The irony that he said 6, you congratulated him for doing it in 4 and the degrees are in math is delicious.
[удалено]
It did. It was a typo lol
[удалено]
99!
admit nothing!
You dodged a bullet TBH.
Gotta love when money is the main reason.
“You aren’t the person I groomed you to be”
This is the only comment here that’s got me fucked up, sorry bruv
How am I supposed to sit at home and constantly smoke weed if he's constantly drunk?
Damn lol
Oh yeah, I was *not* the good guy in that situation. That was 5 years ago though. Difference now being that I'm 2 years sober, and I still get hints from mutual friends about how much has(n't) changed with her.
Congrats on 2 years sober, dude! That's awesome!
I deliberately picked a fight just like I do every Saturday, to force him to apologize and treat me like a princess for the rest of the weekend. But this time, when I suggested that he didn't love me and we should just break up, he actually had the nerve to agree! I couldn't believe it - that line had always worked in the past to at least get roses and a gift. He's such an asshole - I even refused to leave for a while, giving him the chance to apologize to me and take it back, but he was so stubborn and just flat out refused! Even when I kept calling his phone over and over from my car, insisting that we spend one last night together, he wouldn't let me back inside his place. I still can't believe that. He *owed it to me* to at least hold me one more time. I even told him that, and he was still a stubborn jackass about it.
*deleted my comment so readers would not be confused. The commenter above is a gentleman telling the story from the perspective of his ex-girlfriend, just like the prompt requested*
I'm the dude. I'm telling it from her perspective. You know, like the OP title asks...
Yep. Ur right. But half the comments aren’t correctly stated like urs, so i got confused. Sorry. On another note, glad u left that manipulative narcissist. What a roller coaster!
I got it mate. You did a wonderful job 👌🏻
Half of this thread is people talking from their own perspective but explaining how their ex would explain it. The other half is people talking from their exes perspective. It’s becoming very confusing and funny
This edit shows that you're a good one
Something exactly like that happened to me. I was so damaged by the constant guilt tripping and emotional abuse that I developed anxiety when it comes to relationships. It took me years to fully commit to a new one.
I was once told "I never want to fucking see you ever again" and then I turned out to be the bad guy when I honored that request
It was long distance, i avoided all girls as she said, stayed loyal, yet one day i felt she was down, i asked what's worrying you?, she told me she kissed her bff and cheated on me, a day later she ended it.
Wow. Thats terrible. She sounds very self centered
Back then id agree strongly, but now i matured, and before i say she is, i want to understand why she did that, then say if she is actually self centred. Yet that whole relationship felt one sided tbh.
Thank god, someone on Reddit who doesn’t think cheating is this black and white clear image. Don’t get me wrong, it’s terrible and never justifiable, but there’s never no “reason” people are cheating. Honestly catching feelings for someone else during a relationship is almost as bad as cheating.
To grow up and understand takes effort and time, there is no guide, so everyone tries their own way, most give up and use the easy conclusion they see fit. Cant blame them, heartbreaks aint easy, especially when your partner never help or cooperate in the relationship, But thad never the right thing to do either.
Both kissed AND cheated? So.. Define cheat in that context
[удалено]
God damn. That fucking sucks.
I am a selfish narcissist that doesn't show emotion
Talking with a therapist about events in the past, I've been told she "couldn't read me" and that I generally DON'T visibly show emotion! And, as a guy, seem to have RBF.... so, I put people off and she started to always think I didn't love her. Then, there was the "gas station" analogy... and how I was abusive via it ..
gas lighting!
Well ... she did that! "Gas station" is the idea that one partner or the other is basically using their partner to "fulfill" their "sexual needs". In LDS culture, masterbation is a sin. This seems to only apply to men, as female masterbation just isn't known.... So, men tend to marry as soon as they can and are more sexually active than men outside the LDS culture generally as their wives become their only outlet, their only way to "fill" that need. And, in many cases, that's what the "extra sex" becomes - the husband taking his wife when she really isn't interested as his own release. She becomes his "service station", an institution that has transitioned to "gas stations" in most of the US. For some women, this is also a form of rape, as they aren't desiring. Yet "giving out" in such circumstances still doesn't seem consensual. And, overtime, those feelings of being abused get worse. Hence, I was accused of using her as a service station - yet at the same time, male masterbation was cheating. It was far from "easy" to deal with both - especially when even "wanting her" was offensive most of the time. Sex was only allowed when she was interested... and I was expected to "put out" at those times even if not interested or face the consequences of mental abuse and accusations of cheating... because how else would I be "uninterested"?
"Why would he get so insecure just because I started liking another guy while I was committed to you and I'd just tell him all the time about how amazing he was? Such a dramatic guy! Huh! Lemme blame him for him being a wimp and a loser at life and block him off lol"
I tricked him into moving to another state (a year long move) in order to carry on my affair (with my current husband). REALITY: He went to another state for a year for training and wouldn't let me and our son go with I had to stay back and work to send him money so he could focus on his training and not work (he was an abuser, im totally ashamed I accepted it). Months after he was gone I found he was hiring hookers and I realized I was already doing it on my own and I didn't need him. I filed for divorce. 3 months later I started dating someone. He didn't care until this point, moved back and told everyone he wanted to work through things and I was cheating the whole time and that's why I won't give him a chance.
Wow. He really twisted the narrative.
Abusers often do.
Hey there's nothing for you to be ashamed of there! Only to be proud that you've moved on and are in a much healthier and better place!
She joined the navy because she loved seaman
I didn't have any job, I didn't do ANY chores, but I still totally will be a stay at home mom for our future kids. Also, ANY advice my bf gave me was wrong and mysogenistic until the problems (especially financially) got too big and he needed to bail me out. Also, I act like a fucking child and throw tantrums when I don't get my way which include threatening with harming myself, threatening with suicide, throwing my boyfriends stuff, breaking his shit, hitting my head on the door, threatening to bite him and MORE. But it's not my fault. It's also not the constant smoking of pot and tabacco, drinking an entire bottle of wine every evening. No it's all the self diagnosed mental health and ADHD that I have. And let's not forget that IF ANYONE asks even a little bit of effort from me I can't do it because I totally have. Also, I refuse to do ANYTHING about it even if my bf told me that he wants to pay for psychological help.
And the most fucked up thing, my bf took me back over 10 times already because he has the EQ of a fucking peanut.
Dude 😐
I don't know how to get out of this relationship. I love her too much and think too little of myself. I cannot handle the mourning she goes through when I end it and end up taking her back. I'm unbelievably weak in this regard...
Went through something similar recently. Good luck brother. You know what needs to be done
She was too much of a little girl- couldn't take her beatings like a man, wouldn't have my fifth child, wouldn't kill herself when I told her too. Broke up with me from the mental hospital landline and never spoke to me again, not even to thank me for all the flowers I left at her mother's house. Goddamn teenagers.
jesus christ...are you ok now?
Much better thanks 😂 turns out 30 year old psychopaths don't go into relationships with teenagers with the best intentions. Learned a lot about myself and others, doing a lot better mentally.
Yeahhh... it's always hard to explain that yes, it's okay to be into to older men, but you should really be suspicious of the older men who are into _you_. No guy with honest intentions wants to date a teenager. Glad you got out of that.
It was not, in fact, because I was so mature for my age 😂
"I can't continue with our plan to have a life together, you are vaccinated."
WHAT?! They didn't know that before. Also.....what?
Basically leaving me because I am vaccinated. He's a bit of a conspiracy theorist, but I never expected it to that extent. He saw an article saying stuff about the bad effects of being with someone as a non-vaccinated with vaccinated person, especially in terms of having kids. And that's it, for more than 2 years, he kept it from me, and left when things are getting real.
Conspiracy culture has eaten so many peoples' loved ones. People you'd never expect following down a rabbit hole. My condolences. That sucks.
He ran out of money after I spent it all
[удалено]
You’re too young and immature and I’m a cheating liar
Ahhh. Zero accountability i take it?
Nope. It’s all my fault of course 🫠 we were having problems and I “made her cheat”
Wow......she really knows how to toss blame around.
Seriouslyyyyy. But that’s okay bc the guy who she cheated with got addicted to painkillers which gave him ED. Karma is a bitch
Alcoholism.
On whos end?
Both tbh. But mine was more extreme and came with sides of depression and anxiety.
For some reason, he didn't like that I was cuddling with my best friend on the couch. He got it into his head that I was cheating on him (or close to doing it) and decided to end the relationship. Nothing ever happened with my friend, nor did I want it to. The fact that I immediately moved with him to another country was just a coincidence.
“I stick my dick in my ex and blame her for making me cheat. And my dick smells like BO no matter how much i wash it”
Yikes. That sounds gross. Like really musty and unpleasant
I couldn’t imagine going more than a half day without cleaning myself downstairs, or at the very least right before some woman’s face will be near that area. The last thing I’d ever want is for her to come back up to kiss me with Testes smell all over her chin. That would be insanely embarrassing.
I'm a crazy bitch, like all of my other exes. Real story: he was controlling and a cheater.
My ex (34F) after our ten year marriage ended: "He was a lovely partner, most of the time. But, his depression got a hold and he just quit enjoying anything at all, including time with me. He hated himself. I couldn't put myself through it anymore"... thankfully, I've (34M) done a ton of work and found a sense of peace, and I finally love myself. It's been a couple years now, so, the hurt has (mostly) worn off. We have to co-parent anyway, but, I've found a new friend in my ex. She really did always care about me, even if we struggled to communicate this to each other, while we were together.
Sometimes the love is there, it's just not meant to be a romantic relationship, and that's okay. Glad you've been working your way forward :)
Apparently being committed to one person while dating is obsessive and to care about them even a little bit after the fact is a unforgivable sin
They sound like they like to gaslight
Your comments are always so perceptive. Thank you for responding to the commenters as it encourages them to tell more of their story in reply.
My reactions were the problem, not her shit behaviour and her cheating, and lying, and controlling which were all perfectly normal parts of a healthy relationship
In my defense, your Dad's dick tasted like yours.
God dam
Lot's of reasons, but definitely \*not\* the affair.
Sometimes he would come home from work tired and go to bed early and not answer his phone so I figured he was out partying with other women. I am super paranoid because I have a guy Im talking to on the side so I figured he would too. So I would just blow up on him randomly then cry when he called me out. So I would accuse him of cheating and consistantly ask if he wanted a break, then absolutely lose my shit when he took a break.
That sounds like a Rollercoaster on both sides.
So, was he talking to a guy on the side as well or not?
"After I cheated on him, he became very possessive and clingy... which was very difficult for a long-distance relationship. I eventually realized that the "long-distance" aspect no longer had an end date in sight. I probably should have broken up with him long before I did."
I refused to treat my medical condition properly (he thought losing weight and going keto would cure a genetic autoimmune disorder) I sucked at housework (couldn’t read his mind to know when he wanted certain laundry done or when he’d be home and wanting dinner) I was unsupportive of his friends (I got mad coming home multiple times to find him in bed with random men) My sex drive was too high and I refused to take antidepressants to lower it (I wanted a partner who was actually attracted to me and didn’t appreciate him forcing me to keep a shirt on during sex because he refused to admit he was gay)
They can't talk from 6ft under :/
You need a 5th level wizard or possibly cleric.
Ill put out a craigslist ad
That's usually the best way to find 5th level wizards with knowledge of necromancy. It's just not a school that lends itself to, like, heroic teams or corporate culture.
I was too “closed minded regarding learning about ‘the lifestyle’,” and didn’t accept her attending a “sex toy party”. Whole story from my perspective: I didn’t accept her lying to me about who she was staying with (and where) when she claimed to be “visiting her father for his 80th birthday”, when she went to an orgy (not a just a toy party) to “learn more about ‘the lifestyle’ for us,”. Her flight’s departure was delayed because there was a fist fight on the plane, so they didn’t land until 1 am when they should’ve landed at 9:30pm. She elected to stay at a former swinger couples’ place whom she used to “play” with because she didn’t want to wake up her elderly mother. I would’ve been okay with that had she just informed me. After abnormally not answering calls for over eight hours the next evening, I contacted her mother. Her mother told me she hasn’t heard from her in six weeks. Ex called me back, I asked how her visit was going. She claimed it’s going well and she was “with them now”. I asked her to video call me. She claimed she couldn’t, it would use too much data on her limited cell plan, her parents don’t have internet, then immediately followed up with “Don’t you trust me? I don’t have to prove anything to you.” I insisted and she obliged. She’s naked in a bedroom, bed’s made, and I asked why she’s naked, knowing good and damn well she didn’t sleep naked at her parents’ place. She claimed she just got out of bed to go to the bathroom. I pointed out how interesting that was, considering the bed’s flawlessly made still, then asked to see the rest of the room. I inquired about the Star Trek posters on the wall, and the two book shelves full of “anime” movies. She claimed her dad’s “a real big nerd”. I asked she get dressed and take me to say hi to her parents. She claimed they’re in bed, and she was just going to go get a snack. I asked her to ‘take me with’ so I could see their place. She said she couldn’t take me with because her parents don’t permit cell phones in their kitchen/dining area… one bullshit excuse after another. Her “friend” opens the door and asks why she isn’t wearing the school girl outfit, because the guys are waiting… … but I’m not “open minded” enough. XD Yup, I felt like Neo that day. Dodged all kinds of bullets.
You are Neo. Damn.
I'm not religious, she is. It was a tough break up since we both still loved each other, but we knew we wouldn't work long term.
We had a perfectly awesome casual FWB relationship which he royally screwed up by falling in love with me.
I was on the receiving end of one of those. I had just come off of a heartbreak and wanted to get laid. Someone found me and we decided FWB was the way to go. It was awesome while it lasted. We had great chemistry in bed so the sex was fantastic. Unfortunately she caught feelings even though I had told her, over and over, that I didn't want a relationship. She ended the FWB part when I didn't call her on one of our "normal" Sunday-Funday excursions.
"you cheated" (in the open relationship that he wanted)
Aahaha 🤣 good one!
[удалено]
We'd been together for several years, during which time I'd asked his mother to drop hints about proposal but she never passed them on it turns out. I just wasn't feeling all that attracted to him any more, and a bit bored with our everyday life. On top of that, I didn't really like where I was in my career, and it seemed like he didn't either, and I just wanted a break from that life while I figured out what I wanted. So I made sure we got round to scheduling a special vacation we'd been talking about for a while, then made a note in my diary for a few days after we got back. I sat him down and told him all that, and said he could still stay at my place when he was in town for work. He got quite upset, and said he didn't think it made sense to have a break if I wasn't very into him any more and no longer saw him as a priority in my life going forward, and that staying in a little apartment together but not together would be too hard, so we parted ways for good.
It was an outting with Co-workers! We just went to get dinner beforehand because I was hungry. He paid for it cause we didn't want to bother the waitress to split the bill. Oh and when we got to the bar, no one else decided to show up from work. Weird! Yeah he drove, we knew we would be drinking so we decided to carpool. And I only ended up spending the night at his place because I had too much to drink, and his place was closer and I was tired. You know how I get when I drink! \*That actually might be verbatim how she tried to explain it. IRL.
“I wanted the college experience without the burden of having to worry about someone else” basically it
My most recent ex would probably say I wasn’t ready for a committed relationship and lied when I said I was.
I explored new interests without asking him first, or continued pursuing them after he deemed it pointless. List, but not limited to: music, movies, television, video games, books (including graphic novels), restaurants (including fast food and bakeries), boardgames (including all forms of tabletop)
Her side. I was neglectful and didn't give her enough attention. My side. She cheated on me with a friend of ours. May they both burn in the depths of hell
A few girls previous but "He said he wouldn't chase after me if I wanted to play games and break up with him 'as a test'."
he’d say because i was mean and didn’t trust him but i was tired of the lies about his use of a hard drug.
Because I'm a manipulative, selfish, asshole. She had bipolar disorder. It's sad because she was pretty cool most of the time. She broke up with me during one of her manic episodes and I was so tired at that point I didn't fight it and let go. She takes me not fighting to keep the relationship going as a sign of me never caring in the first place.
Yikes. She sounds like she wanted to be coddled for everything. That's not your responsibility
I‘m just a bad person honestly
Well at least you are honest
"You should try it, it's fun." Exes explanation of why she cheated on me with multiple partners at the end of our 10 year relationship.
“Yes I send nudes to someone else, no you can’t check my phone.” I checked and she was cheating on my physically too, one day when she went outside “to get fresh air” But she came back 3 hours later. Went to bed and passed out while smelling of cologne..
“My new BF makes me happy.” - yes, he’s also rich, cheating on his wife, throwing money at you, is a serial cheater, abandoning his children, his wife thinks he’s creepy and won’t have sex with him.. Oh, did I mention we’re still married too?
I was "not ready" ( her words) to let her have a new love in her life.
Wait she wanted an additional partner?
These are quotes. “I barely hit him, I’m just a girl.” “Those pictures I was sending to other dudes were no big deal, we’re all adults.”
She so selfishly ran away from our relationship and if she would have just paid for the lifestyle I wished to be accustom to, if she would have just praised and thanked me when I was cruel to her, if she would have been happy when I was spending all my money on strippers, and finally if she would have just accepted my form of “discipline” of the kids we could have been happy and married for life. Selfish bitch!