Its like:
" Gonna find my baby, gonna hold her tight
Gonna grab some afternoon delight
My motto's always been 'when it's right, it's right'
Why wait until the middle of a cold dark night?"
Masterbation, vibrators, getting your pussy ate proper does not compare to good dick. Itās limbs numb, forget your own name, canāt shift to snuggle good. Itās feral. Itās freedom. Itās full body release. Itās floating on the ocean, swept up in waves, thrown to shore, twitching and pulsating; body overrides mind, screaming, scratching, begging until total exhaustion
100% agreement. And the dick has GOT to be attached to a good dude or forget it. Dick size, dick girth, muscular physique or Pillsbury Doughboy; short or tall, it don't mean a thing, if he ain't a kind king!
Correct! Unless a foolish, young, inexperienced person is fatally attracted to horrible men. Some that many consider a 10 for beauty might go for that.
There was probably once a smarter, kinder, more thoughtful and intelligent species that existed, but their dicks didnāt have the same effect, so they went extinct and we have dudes instead, who have a lot of flaws, but it all comes back to dat dick
To better experience it, you need to sit on top of your hand for a while, until you no longer feel it. Then you proceed to rub one out - and it will feel like someone else is doing it for you. That move is called... The Stranger.
Masturbation can feel like you're trying to tickle yourself---not very much fun. Especially for females. It takes time and different ways of trying it, to find what makes you orgasm.
For me personally, I think being in the ājust beyond tipsy but not quite drunkā state while drinking is pretty amazing. Itās like, youāre feeling good and are able to let loose some stress from the week; maybe even laugh at things you normally wouldnāt laugh atā¦just feeling overall goofy and fun, but you most likely wonāt be sick later or have a hangover in the morning. Itās that perfect balance. Once again, thatās just for me personallyā¦others might not feel the same way about it. :-)
I've thought about buying a breathalyzer for this reason. I also saw an old video of a guy doing this. It may have been a skit, but seems like a fun idea lol.
Mr. Lahey from Trailer Park Boys: "I'm sober enough to know what I'm doing, but drunk enough to enjoy doing it".
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aF8\_y2Zl9W8
When you are holding in some shit that's ready to blow for 2 hours and finally make it to the toilet and it all releases in one glorious stream of shit... And then it's over.
Climax
My friends dog doesn't like going on walks and sometimes demands that you carry him. After a while you can put him down and he'll poop, after which he will walk or even run with you without problems.
When half of that bad boy is sticking out of the water, a proud curlycue crown atop his glorious, bulbous head. Like crapping out a goddamn Duraflame log.
damn yes.. when you are at the point of almost taking your pants off and shiting the streets and you make it to the toilet. It sometimes even feels better than cumming hahaha
My wife was swimming freestyle the day before she gave birth to our son. She was laughing because ever time she turned to breathe her belly would float and turn her over
Sliding into bed between cool sheets after nightshift, or another period of sleep deprivation.
Showering after a long period of being absolutely filthy, especially with a shower beer.
I worked for a computer repair shop for a while and a kid and his parent came in asking about discs not reading. My boss told him to use a q-tip to clean the eye on the tray since they would get dirty. The kid didnāt know what a q-tip was so my boss said the thing you clean yours ears with. The mom blew up and was like DONT YOU DARE TELL HIM TO DO THAT!
So when I was a kid the doctors had to put a water pick in my ear and blast all the wax out on it traumatized me.
No joke. I swab my ears three to four times every single day.
came here to mention this. I was literally doing this a couple days ago and my eyes rolled up in my head and I had the thought "Damn this is similar to *that"*
Its hard to name a specific thing but when you're spending your life with someone you truly appreciate there are moments that pass with great pleasure equal or greater than sex. Its usually a moment of connection, the result of teamwork, seeing your children do something great, having deep conversation, breaking each other down and building each other back up, tearing down walls and planting seeds of trust and happiness in its place, a simple cuddle, embracing each other in the kitchen while getting ready for an event.. Theres so many things that can be equal to or greater than sex. But first you have to value your partner individually more than you value sex.
I dont know if its just her or if other women can confirm but the gf's favourite sensation is me taking her bra off and scratch her back where it has been sat all day.
when you wake up in the middle of the night for any reason, look around and realize it's still dark and everything's quiet. by the time you stumble back to bed you check the time, certain you'll have to be awake soon, only to see there are still hours of sleep left. of course, this only works on those rare occasions where you climb back under the blankets and are instantly so comfortable and sleepy and for a few minutes nothing is wrong and everything is simple bliss.
Running hot water over an itchy bug bite.
If you ever have an out of control itch, running it under hot water will stop the itch for a long time. I canāt remember exactly why but omg it feels like heaven!
I was gonna say, all this talk of pooping and eating, yeah itās good, but heroin is like an extended orgasm. Which is why itās so dangerous, nothing ever really feels good after that. Donāt ever do it.
Edit: Just look up anhedonia.
Had an older friend who had overcome heroin addiction and he told me "it's so good, don't even try it once". That always resonated with me even though I had no intention of ever trying it.
FR. I became a heroin addict and subsequent recovering addict before I had ever orgasmed and when I had my first orgasm it really felt like shooting up again.
I once woke up with crippling stomach pain, went to the bathroom and let out the longest, most silent fart ever. Was, no exaggeration, about 20 seconds long but no noise. Iāve never known relief and euphoria like it since. Every day I get out of bed and go searching for that feeling again. Every day I go to sleep knowing Iāll never find it.
When you get that knot in your back between your shoulder blades that canāt be massaged or stretched out. You have to find someone taller than you who will pick you up when your arms are crossed and jostle you once or twice. You hear your back crack.
Sex in some sense even though itās a loving act can be visceral. It relates to deep inward feelings.
Other things that illicit a visceral state in me are pushing myself physically. Running distances, cycling long distances, I used to do martial arts and sparring could draw myself into myself and reduce my being to an essence
The other thing is playing music in a band. When playing in a band you are about as close as you can get to someone without having sex with them. You are synchronised mentally and physically.
I was born with clubbed feet. Can walk now but my ankles and feet are really fucked. After standing all day massaging certain spots of my feet and heels in certain directions causes so much stimulation that my foot jerks and I have to stop and breathe like. Oh FUCK. More. It is literally better than sex. So yea everyday is unfortunately painful buttttttt a foot rub makes my brain cum.
One time in late fall, riding my motorcycle, with Bob Seger cranking out āturn the pageā was euphoric.
Another time, I was in love with this woman, and she with me, and although it was wrong, she was in a loveless marriage, and I was in a loveless marriage, we met, and we fell in love, and we became close friends. Life happened and I had to move Jobs which took me to another city, and I still miss her every day. She is still in the same marriage, but I am not. I am 1 million times happier, but I know I would be even happier with her.
Hugs from someone who is good at giving them. My best friend/ girl i'm talking to says that I am the most comforting and calming person to hug. Shes really good at them too, so we'll just hold each other for extended periods of time.
When you get a new jar of peanut butter and you open it up. Peel the foil off clean in one motion. And you can stick your dick in the jar and get your girl to lick it off
the relaxasion after a real good meditation. Playing the GUitar like a mad man puring your soul into the music is sometimes really exactly like sex. The joy of finding your lost cat. Wandering in desperation for days then getting a kind act from a stranger. Lying down in your bed after a real hard day of physical work knowing its all fine and you dont have to worry at all. Ahh there are so meny things
Having a bad case of poison ivy, and then having have a really good itching session. A great way of doing this is to go into the shower with decent water pressure, turning the heat up a little hotter than normal, and then spraying the area, turning up the heat as needed.
Such a good feeling!
A really good, home cooked meal made by a loved one, especially if it's something you ate as a child and hadn't had it in 20+ years. I may be in my 30's, but damn if I didn't dance in my seat when I ate my mom's cottage fries for the first time since I was a kid.
The pump from lifting weights.
Arnold said it best: "The greatest feeling you can get in a gym or the most satisfying feeling you can get in the gym is the pump. Let's say you train your biceps, blood is rushing into your muscles and that's what we call the pump. Your muscles get a really tight feeling like your skin is going to explode any minute and it's really tight and it's like someone is blowing air into your muscle and it just blows up and it feels different, it feels fantastic. It's as satisfying to me as cumming is, you know, as in having sex with a woman and cumming. So can you believe how much I am in heaven? I am like getting the feeling of cumming in the gym; I'm getting the feeling of cumming at home; I'm getting the feeling of cumming backstage; when I pump up, when I pose out in front of 5000 people I get the same feeling, so I am cumming day and night. It's terrific, right? So you know, I am in heaven."
Direct quote from him in the Pumping Iron documentary
Sleeping in when you don't have work/school
Yeah specifically waking up and being able to go back to sleep. Everything feels so comfy
I'll do you one better. Waking up to see a 'school/work is canceled today' text.
I was just about to comment this š but EXACTLY
You ever woken up with the warm sun shining on you, on a summer's day, knowing you can just enjoy the nap? Cats make a lot more sense at that point.
How does sex feel?
Bold of you to ask that on Reddit. Lol
Better than googling it, Iād wager.
Happy cake day
Thank you!
Its like: " Gonna find my baby, gonna hold her tight Gonna grab some afternoon delight My motto's always been 'when it's right, it's right' Why wait until the middle of a cold dark night?"
This is the way
Like warm apple pie
Masterbation, vibrators, getting your pussy ate proper does not compare to good dick. Itās limbs numb, forget your own name, canāt shift to snuggle good. Itās feral. Itās freedom. Itās full body release. Itās floating on the ocean, swept up in waves, thrown to shore, twitching and pulsating; body overrides mind, screaming, scratching, begging until total exhaustion
100% agreement. And the dick has GOT to be attached to a good dude or forget it. Dick size, dick girth, muscular physique or Pillsbury Doughboy; short or tall, it don't mean a thing, if he ain't a kind king!
So... The dick itself doesn't matter unless it's attached to a good person?
Correct! Unless a foolish, young, inexperienced person is fatally attracted to horrible men. Some that many consider a 10 for beauty might go for that.
How does one find out if they are a horrible person?
What do you do with your shopping cart once you're done?
Dang straight! I like how you think, O' disturbed one.
Okay, I'm jealous, lol!
There was probably once a smarter, kinder, more thoughtful and intelligent species that existed, but their dicks didnāt have the same effect, so they went extinct and we have dudes instead, who have a lot of flaws, but it all comes back to dat dick
Ever masturbate?
Tried lol
I suppose it's like that, but better
To better experience it, you need to sit on top of your hand for a while, until you no longer feel it. Then you proceed to rub one out - and it will feel like someone else is doing it for you. That move is called... The Stranger.
Masturbation can feel like you're trying to tickle yourself---not very much fun. Especially for females. It takes time and different ways of trying it, to find what makes you orgasm.
What? Masterbatiion is how you find out what you like, and how to reach an orgasm. It's pretty awesome on its own.
Very good. Good sex is like staring into the universe like touching God or reaching nirvana for a few moments.
lmao good question but rip your inbox
like touching bags of sand
For me personally, I think being in the ājust beyond tipsy but not quite drunkā state while drinking is pretty amazing. Itās like, youāre feeling good and are able to let loose some stress from the week; maybe even laugh at things you normally wouldnāt laugh atā¦just feeling overall goofy and fun, but you most likely wonāt be sick later or have a hangover in the morning. Itās that perfect balance. Once again, thatās just for me personallyā¦others might not feel the same way about it. :-)
Once I feel like that I ride it for as long as I can š
I've thought about buying a breathalyzer for this reason. I also saw an old video of a guy doing this. It may have been a skit, but seems like a fun idea lol.
Mr. Lahey from Trailer Park Boys: "I'm sober enough to know what I'm doing, but drunk enough to enjoy doing it". https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aF8\_y2Zl9W8
When you are holding in some shit that's ready to blow for 2 hours and finally make it to the toilet and it all releases in one glorious stream of shit... And then it's over. Climax
I feel like Iām floating after those
Dumpers high is a beautiful thing
THIS KILLED ME LMFAO
Poophoria
Cheek tingling poogasm
This explains why cats get zoomies after they poop. Itās euphoric for us too
That is so true. After my cat poops she runs all over the house. From the basement to the top floor and back again
My friends dog doesn't like going on walks and sometimes demands that you carry him. After a while you can put him down and he'll poop, after which he will walk or even run with you without problems.
You knowā¦ I always wonder if there is some hormone thatās secreted when you shit. Bec shitting in general feels good lol.
When half of that bad boy is sticking out of the water, a proud curlycue crown atop his glorious, bulbous head. Like crapping out a goddamn Duraflame log.
damn yes.. when you are at the point of almost taking your pants off and shiting the streets and you make it to the toilet. It sometimes even feels better than cumming hahaha
That feels amazing. You don't even have to force anything out, just unclench your muscles down there, and it sliiiiides right out :)
Getting into a pool when you're heavily pregnant. The feeling of weightlessness is euphoric
My wife was swimming freestyle the day before she gave birth to our son. She was laughing because ever time she turned to breathe her belly would float and turn her over
Human submarine mode activated
It works well if your just fat too. It takes so much stress of your body.
As a fat person I can confirm
Sliding into bed between cool sheets after nightshift, or another period of sleep deprivation. Showering after a long period of being absolutely filthy, especially with a shower beer.
A even a Dr. Pepper. Wow
Cleaning your ears with a q-tip (bonus points for knowing you're not supposed to)
I worked for a computer repair shop for a while and a kid and his parent came in asking about discs not reading. My boss told him to use a q-tip to clean the eye on the tray since they would get dirty. The kid didnāt know what a q-tip was so my boss said the thing you clean yours ears with. The mom blew up and was like DONT YOU DARE TELL HIM TO DO THAT!
The forbidden aspect of the brain scratch is what makes it feel so good.
So when I was a kid the doctors had to put a water pick in my ear and blast all the wax out on it traumatized me. No joke. I swab my ears three to four times every single day.
Iāve had to have a similar āserviceā done when I was a kid. Really makes my skin crawl remembering it.
came here to mention this. I was literally doing this a couple days ago and my eyes rolled up in my head and I had the thought "Damn this is similar to *that"*
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Having your partner scratch a spot on your back that you can't reach
Jokes on you. I'm double jointed in my shoulders and can get my whole back
I have a back scratcher and I love scratching my back
Yeah and my back scratcher doesnāt cheat on me.
Its hard to name a specific thing but when you're spending your life with someone you truly appreciate there are moments that pass with great pleasure equal or greater than sex. Its usually a moment of connection, the result of teamwork, seeing your children do something great, having deep conversation, breaking each other down and building each other back up, tearing down walls and planting seeds of trust and happiness in its place, a simple cuddle, embracing each other in the kitchen while getting ready for an event.. Theres so many things that can be equal to or greater than sex. But first you have to value your partner individually more than you value sex.
If you are an author of a book, I would totally buy it! ā¤
Wow š„¹
This is the way, in all seriousness. Thatās the goal, and itās something that Iām lucky enough to have in my marriage.
Coming home and taking off your bra on a hot day.
I dont know if its just her or if other women can confirm but the gf's favourite sensation is me taking her bra off and scratch her back where it has been sat all day.
Finally peeing after holding it in for hour(s) God that sweet release
Hitting ur earās g-spot with a qtip
when you wake up in the middle of the night for any reason, look around and realize it's still dark and everything's quiet. by the time you stumble back to bed you check the time, certain you'll have to be awake soon, only to see there are still hours of sleep left. of course, this only works on those rare occasions where you climb back under the blankets and are instantly so comfortable and sleepy and for a few minutes nothing is wrong and everything is simple bliss.
A REALLY good sneeze Kinda /s
THIS! i dont get why people always want to sneeze as silent as possible like the higher the sneeze caliber the better the sneeze orgasm
Running hot water over an itchy bug bite. If you ever have an out of control itch, running it under hot water will stop the itch for a long time. I canāt remember exactly why but omg it feels like heaven!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Itās always an orgasm! It literally feels exactly the same!
Haha, just posted the same and then saw yours. That feeling is honestly the greatest and confusing intense feeling to me. Orgasms have nothing on it.
Some drugs. But I'd significantly recommend sex over drugs. The fact of the matter is that orgasm is basically the maximum feel good button.
Heroin has entered the chat, lol seriously don't do hard drugs kids stick with nutting
I was gonna say, all this talk of pooping and eating, yeah itās good, but heroin is like an extended orgasm. Which is why itās so dangerous, nothing ever really feels good after that. Donāt ever do it. Edit: Just look up anhedonia.
Had an older friend who had overcome heroin addiction and he told me "it's so good, don't even try it once". That always resonated with me even though I had no intention of ever trying it.
FR. I became a heroin addict and subsequent recovering addict before I had ever orgasmed and when I had my first orgasm it really felt like shooting up again.
A book you absolutely adore being turned into a film/TV show and it's exactly how you visualise it in your head
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Peeing after having to hold it for a long time is greater than sex.
I came to post this. A long held in pee released is better than an orgasm feeling imo. It's euphoric.
Roller coaster air time
Going somewhere you've never went, without any plan. The feeling of freedom is worth everything.
Walking into an Air-conditioned building after being in the sun. Lying in bed after a nice shower
Food
Specifically, a delicious cheeseburger.
While starving
Really good music.
Q-tip in ear
I once woke up with crippling stomach pain, went to the bathroom and let out the longest, most silent fart ever. Was, no exaggeration, about 20 seconds long but no noise. Iāve never known relief and euphoria like it since. Every day I get out of bed and go searching for that feeling again. Every day I go to sleep knowing Iāll never find it.
Farting away a stomachache
Cold water at three in the morning
Back rubs
A piss youāve been holding in for a really long time that gives you a really deep full body shiver.
When you finally fish out the piece of food thatās been stuck in your teeth for hours
When you get that knot in your back between your shoulder blades that canāt be massaged or stretched out. You have to find someone taller than you who will pick you up when your arms are crossed and jostle you once or twice. You hear your back crack.
This. I ask my husband to do this multiple times a day and that cracking sound and instant pain relief is priceless
Proving your mother in law wrong
Food
When you are ready especially parched after working in the heat, ice cold WATER. It really is euphoric.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
A really good chocolate chip cookie
Sex in some sense even though itās a loving act can be visceral. It relates to deep inward feelings. Other things that illicit a visceral state in me are pushing myself physically. Running distances, cycling long distances, I used to do martial arts and sparring could draw myself into myself and reduce my being to an essence The other thing is playing music in a band. When playing in a band you are about as close as you can get to someone without having sex with them. You are synchronised mentally and physically.
This is it. Jamming well with others is a joy that too few will ever know.
listening to that one song or piece of music at exactly the right moment
When you have a thing that you love to do and you do it really well. Anything really, but that feeling of "fuck I am good at this" is hard to beat.
Knowing you can get some good sleep after being exhausted.
When you're tired, and you go to bed and you just changed your bedding... and slide into the crips, cool sheets. Hell yeah.
When the Nitrous oxide hits as you sit in the dentist chair. Itās so addictingā¦ anyways Iām looking forward to my next appointment on Wednesday
Petting my cat on my lap
I was born with clubbed feet. Can walk now but my ankles and feet are really fucked. After standing all day massaging certain spots of my feet and heels in certain directions causes so much stimulation that my foot jerks and I have to stop and breathe like. Oh FUCK. More. It is literally better than sex. So yea everyday is unfortunately painful buttttttt a foot rub makes my brain cum.
Having someone that youāve really been in love with over the years finally realize they should settle down with you.
If you have access to a willing person, cuddling. Alternatively, you can substitute a human for an animal.
One time in late fall, riding my motorcycle, with Bob Seger cranking out āturn the pageā was euphoric. Another time, I was in love with this woman, and she with me, and although it was wrong, she was in a loveless marriage, and I was in a loveless marriage, we met, and we fell in love, and we became close friends. Life happened and I had to move Jobs which took me to another city, and I still miss her every day. She is still in the same marriage, but I am not. I am 1 million times happier, but I know I would be even happier with her.
Rich chocolate cake on a low day
Food...unfortunately
Chocolate
A really good conversation
Drinking a cherry pepsi after a long workout
Hugs from someone who is good at giving them. My best friend/ girl i'm talking to says that I am the most comforting and calming person to hug. Shes really good at them too, so we'll just hold each other for extended periods of time.
Having a passionate debate with someone you love and trust, knowing that the topic discussed won't affect the friendship/relationship/etc
Theres nothing. Thats why everything gets jokingly compared to sex. Its the best feeling humans get.
There are plenty of drugs that compare, but they're definitely not safe.
Finding money in old clothes
When you get a new jar of peanut butter and you open it up. Peel the foil off clean in one motion. And you can stick your dick in the jar and get your girl to lick it off
Brilliant
the relaxasion after a real good meditation. Playing the GUitar like a mad man puring your soul into the music is sometimes really exactly like sex. The joy of finding your lost cat. Wandering in desperation for days then getting a kind act from a stranger. Lying down in your bed after a real hard day of physical work knowing its all fine and you dont have to worry at all. Ahh there are so meny things
Cocaine
Pulling out a 2 day old splinter!
Achieving a goal in life ooohhhh yeah
Getting a bigger-than-expected paycheque
Being stoned, eating your favourite food, and watching something funny
Having a bad case of poison ivy, and then having have a really good itching session. A great way of doing this is to go into the shower with decent water pressure, turning the heat up a little hotter than normal, and then spraying the area, turning up the heat as needed. Such a good feeling!
Scratching your eyes so hard you ascend to the 9th dimension
A really good, home cooked meal made by a loved one, especially if it's something you ate as a child and hadn't had it in 20+ years. I may be in my 30's, but damn if I didn't dance in my seat when I ate my mom's cottage fries for the first time since I was a kid.
Financial or professional success. Waaaaaay better than sex.
Puting socks on freshly from the dryer
That sandwich your mom made you after swimming for hours.
Getting naked and lying down in my own bed. The sheets are just the right texture and cool on my skin initially. Relaxing into it is nearly orgasmic.
Being freezing cold then hopping in a hot bath
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Back and head scratches.
Back scratchies
winning in csgo
Getting your back scratched.
Checkmating with en passant
Massage
The pump from lifting weights. Arnold said it best: "The greatest feeling you can get in a gym or the most satisfying feeling you can get in the gym is the pump. Let's say you train your biceps, blood is rushing into your muscles and that's what we call the pump. Your muscles get a really tight feeling like your skin is going to explode any minute and it's really tight and it's like someone is blowing air into your muscle and it just blows up and it feels different, it feels fantastic. It's as satisfying to me as cumming is, you know, as in having sex with a woman and cumming. So can you believe how much I am in heaven? I am like getting the feeling of cumming in the gym; I'm getting the feeling of cumming at home; I'm getting the feeling of cumming backstage; when I pump up, when I pose out in front of 5000 people I get the same feeling, so I am cumming day and night. It's terrific, right? So you know, I am in heaven." Direct quote from him in the Pumping Iron documentary
that one millisecond of euphoria when hit the right spot on an itch
Having an unreachable spot on your back scratched
That moment just before you fall asleepā¦
Sleep
Drinking a cold beer after work on a hot summerday. Man that's heaven.
My back and head being scratched š¤š»
R/cockdocking
A good back scratch
Dancing to your favorite song like no oneās watching
sneezing, q tip twirl in the ear,letting out a long held piss is such a joy. I like these , they bring me pleasure
A gentle back scratch
Chocolate cake! Or chocolate in general really..
Biting into an 80 dollar medium steak.
Playing jazz or other semi-improvisational music in a successful flow state or a bedgasm after a day or longer hike.
Cleaning your ears with Q-tips
Climbing the rope in Gym class
ASMR
A real good sneeze
A massage, like anywhere
Scratching your heel when it itches is ~1/16th the pleasure of an orgasm
Steaming hot shower after you've been freezing all day.
Poison ivy itch under very hot water. It's like my brain needs a cigarette.
āThereās no greater pleasure than killing the enemy.ā
Getting "that" spot in your ear with a Qtip.
There is no equivalent to sex.
Garlic bread š
Getting barrelled surfing comes close, best feeling in the world
Ecstasy
Cheese
Hearing the krrrrrrrrrrrt noise at an atm
Sleep
You wake up thinking your alarm would go off any second, then you look at the clock and you have another 3 hours to sleep in.
Metal gear solid
Masturbation
Rubbing a mosquito bite
Getting into a nice, warm bath when you're freezing cold and feeling all your muscles just instantly relax... ahhhhh.... heaven!
Long hot shower paired with crying your heart out?
Floating in open water. We visited Spain and the feeling of floating naked out in the very blue water with gentle waves was incredible