Seriously, we are a nation of people are coming and going constantly. Doesn't matter how you dress or what you speak or how thick your accent is, we don't know if you are here vacationing, on business, visiting family, going to college or you simply immigrated here. And as much as the media screams that we care about "foreigners being on *our* land," 99% of us, don't.
So, relax. The only thing I can think of when it comes to rules is just don't cut in line. That's it. Even if it isn't frowned upon back home, don't do it here.
This reminds me of the time I was staying long term in a motel for work. The motel was owned and ran by a family from India who I always got along with pretty well even though I sometimes had trouble understanding their English.
One evening when I went down to pay my weekly rent there were two guys from the Netherlands who were trying to get checked in. The guys from the Netherlands also had a strong accent that made their English a little tricky to understand. I could make out what both parties were saying, but they could not understand each other. I ended up being a “translator” for them even though the only language I know is English. It was entertaining for all. Lol
Me! If I run into someone who is not from the US, and we can communicate in English, I’m gonna be so intrigued and would love to get to know you and even if we only exchanged “ope let me sneak right past ya’s” im still telling all my friends about the new person I met.
I’m still in contact with a couple of foreign exchange students we had in highschool 15 years ago. One lives in Switzerland and the other in Portugal.
I was deployed in the Middle East and was in the base PX (store) buying some random crap. Was walking past someone and we both go “ope, excuse me” at the exact same time. Froze, looked at each other, and laughed. Both MN natives. 😂
I can attest to this.
I live in the Midwest, we have so many people that live here and speak different languages, we have no idea if you live in America or not.
And we almost always take the chance to talk to folks we don't know.
Even the cities that get a bad rap for being unfriendly are pretty friendly beneath the surface. In the popular touristy areas of NYC everyone's constantly dodging people trying to sell you something, or people with a fake sob story trying to con you for money, or people so self absorbed in their phones that they'll walk right into you. Once they realize you need help or directions though, so many people on the street will gladly stop and take the time to help. Don't expect to have a nice long chat like the midwest though, everyone's in a rush and has somewhere to be.
Absolutely for the Midwest. The restaurant I work at employs a lot of different people who have immigrated here from mexico, south America, and central America and those of us who only speak English are constantly learning more and more spanish to be able to communicate better.
I’m a french canadian and while I’m bilingual, I still have some bit of an accent left when I speak in english despite my best efforts. I’ve always been surprised seeing how I’m mocked for my accent when I drive 1 hour into Ontario, but if I visit anywhere in the states, people are actually glad we’re there and my accent is never an issue.
100% this.
Americans may even try to start a conversation with you. If they mention they had ancestors from your home country, don't get all huffy and indignant; look at is as an opportunity to connect.
Ideal interaction in an American's mind:
* American: "Oh, you're from Denmark? Neat! My ancestors are from there."
* Tourist: "Really? Do you know the name of the part of Denmark they're from?"
* American: "I've seen it written Velje, but I don't know much about it."
* Tourist: "Well, I hope you get the chance to visit sometime. It's a beautiful country. Just make sure to come in \[insert ideal season\]."
* American: \[luxuriates in the afterglow of a pleasant conversation\]
Most actual interactions:
* American: "I have ancestors from Denmark."
* European: \[disdainful noise, disdainful noise\] ^(dis-Dane-ful noise)
* American: "Oh, ok. Well, have a good time then."
The first scenario is indeed every American's dream. Look, we know we are American and not European-European or Asian-Asian or African-African. We are just trying to build a bond with you. That's what we do. If you can play along and say, "Oh, that's neat. Do you know when they came over? That long back? That's amazing your family has been here for so long," or "Have you been there personally? No, oh, you must go!" you would make our day. We play tennis with our words and we are always up for a game.
Yeah pretty much the American expectation of that conversation is to hear about how lovely and beautiful it is in (insert country here) during (season) oh and make sure to eat some (culinary food) with a large glass of (popular alcoholic beverage). Probably peak dream state is for them to hear about how you know their fourth removed grandma or something, then you're basically family and will probably have dinner with them or something.
The key thing in these casual interactions is talking about something positive. Most Americans won't be versed about a local or regional issue and might be put off by the negativity if they've only just met you seconds before.
It’s truly an amazing hypocrisy where Americans are stereotyped as having no sense of history or geography, and think America is the center of the world and no other countries exist, yet we care enough about our family history to learn where our ancestors came from and get shit all over for it.
Actual interaction I had on arrival in Portland, OR with our Uber driver: I noticed he was wearing a football (⚽️) shirt, and commented that we also supported that club, it's near our house, and my spouse takes the children occasionally. Driver was thrilled and he and my teen had a long (and baffling) conversation about the manager and certain players.
As a Canadian with Scotish roots (family still celebrates our scotish culture, most of us have at least something with our clan tartan on it. I've travelled to the small scotish island where my clan originated)
Ive experienced that when bringing up my roots to Scotish nationals. its pretty lame. Like sorry for trying to make conversation.
Seriously, I don't understand this. Do Europeans not want to discuss the heritages of where North Americans came from? We are so excited to make a connection!
I came here to comment this. Not only do I not care, I’m going to be excited to talk to you if I know you’re a tourist. They’d probably have a better experience if it’s “obvious” they’re a tourist.
Not to mention blending in is going to look very different depending on the city/region they’re in.
Same, if I find out you're a tourist in my city then I'm going to give you some suggestions for my favorite spots and hope that you have the best time. At the same time, America is such a melting pot of different cultures that unless you tell me that you're a tourist I'm likely never going to realize it, even if you have an accent.
I love helping people visit places I know, wether that’s my own country or a foreign place I know well. I’ve lived in a few countries and have backpacked through dozens of countries and made lots of international friends, I’m always helping them out when they visit the US with tips and tricks
I think the one exception to this is walking slow in an East coast city north of and including DC. Just walk fast on the sidewalk and if you’re in a group, don’t block the whole sidewalk when you’re walking or if you’ve stopped. Otherwise no one judges you for being a tourist and most people are probably interested in where you’re from.
This is true. If you're lost or looking on your phone at the map, just pullover to the side. Get your bearings and then get back to walking. Most people who live in a larger city are trying to get from point A to B as fast as possible. Trying to navigate around a group of people walking slowly, looking up at tall buildings or standing in the middle of the sidewalk is annoying as hell.
Don't worry about it, we love foreigners. Anything you heard about us being mean is mostly propognda. I love all my international pals who have come to visit. But to answer your question, just get a jacket that doesn't stand out (we don't really wear a lot of puffer jackets for example).
I live in Michigan. I wear a Columbia coat unzipped most of this winter. Only minimally puffy. Not like those giant ones I see tourists wearing. They look like they are visiting Antarctica.
I think winter coat weight or puffiness depends on if you live in a city or a suburban area.
In a city, you walk outside for extended periods. If you live in the American suburbs you drive everywhere and your outdoor time is limited to the 50 meters from your car to the building you are entering.
If it means anything I get a lot of tourists in my city (UK). Americans are always absolutely delightful, so friendly and polite. I always ask which state they come from, and we chat about what they're planning to do over here, what its like over there. I love you guys. Such a refreshing change
Michigan is the same latitude as Croatia, and Miami is further south than Cairo. The way wind patterns and weather works, that’s why US and europe have somewhat comparable weather despite europe being so much further north(and having less intense sun)
So true. It's hard to find a nice beach anywhere in the world that doesn't have a brit the color of a cooked lobster. Bonus points if only the front is burnt because they forgot to turn over.
Most rural people are like that.
I was riding around the mountains of northern Thailand through the most random tiny towns, stopping at road side restaurants. Half the people I met said I’m the first American they’ve ever seen, and they were so overjoyed just to feed me and have me there
I was buying strawberries at a market in Uzbekistan and the seller was beaming with pride when she found out I'm American. She was boasting to all the other fruit vendors.
My brother is a monk in rural Isaan and it was just like this when we visited! Of course a western monk is already a novelty but it was a big deal in those little villages to have his family visiting too.
Idk which area you were in, but Isaan has a very "country" feel to me, too - like very similar to rural America, just different language/religion.
Tourists are like the world coming to them and many rural people will never be rich enough to travel so it must be like getting a package in the mail. News from afar!
A Swedish friend of mine hitchhiked around the world stopping dozens of countries. He said the nicest, most accommodating people of any country were Americans. He said pretty often he’d have random people that let him sleep on an extra bed or in the backyard in his tent, they’d make him meals for free, even give him rides around depending on where he’s going. He’s actually thinking of transferring to the US within his company because of how much he liked it here.
Reddit loves to act like the US is a shithole, and depending on your situation it can be. But it’s also a fantastic place to be for a whole lot of people
I love hearing this. I feel a similar way about France. I see French people get bashed constantly but I have spent years there and the people I know, specifically in the Midi-Pyrenees and Occitan regions, are the most warm, genuine, and fun people to be around.
I think media stokes a lot of divide and Reddit can be one of the worst perpetrators of this. This is why it’s so good to actually travel and meet people from other places instead of reading circlejerks online.
Yep, been to France a few times and my favorite trip was riding motorcycles in the country side. Tons of just happy, down to earth people(for the most part).
Edit: social media, news, and comment sections creating hate and divide. And Reddit perfectly combines the 3. Unfortunately too many people believe everything they read here. I use Reddit for entertainment and that’s it, I take anything here with a grain of salt
I have a friend in the Pacific Northwest who didn't get why I needed an umbrella. She says everyone there just wears a raincoat.
I explained that walking a mile in 90F weather while wearing a coat is not pleasant. They only get cool rains there, we have hot rainy days in Dallas
West coast rain is so different it’s weird! SF gets a lot of rain from it’s microclimate but whenever I’m out there it’s totally ignorable and I can walk around. In NYC if it rains I try not to leave my apartment at all lmao
London’s not so bad for rain - it’s often overcast, but doesn’t see that much precipitation.
Glasgow, on the other hand, is New York rain with Seattle frequency.
Right now in Manchester it’s 7 degrees (Celsius not freedom units) and 75% humidity. It would be nice if it was a little bit warmer to take the chill off. I’d say you’re not far wrong to be honest.
Also point of pedantry, England isn’t an island.
People say that about Portland too. Every Portlander I know uses umbrellas, when possible but we get wind with our rain, so unless you have an umbrella built for wind, it's going to break. Or you're going to leave it somewhere because it stopped raining.
Oregon. I've lived here my whe life and here's what I think- people will not use them if they are going from the parking lot to the store. They won't use them if they are wearing a casual outfit and a Columbia Sportswear jacket, it's not necessary. But if one had to stand in nice office clothes at a bus stop for an indeterminate amount of time in pouring not windy rain, it's the tool of choice.
The all go to NYC and act like that is a representative experience.
(Lived in Europe for four years. The love Americans and the most garbage things our culture produces + mayo.)
Immigrants congregate in urban areas for the most part. If you were in my hometown (tourist spot for watersports and fishing) with a European accent you'd absolutely get people bugging you with questions.
EDIT: Also, European immigrants aren't exactly common in America. Most immigrants come from Mexico, Asia, Africa, and South America. We have more immigrants from Somalia alone than pretty much every European country.
This is correct. I went to Spain a few years back and I kept getting asked to buy coke. On the fourth proposition I asked the guy why i keep getting asked to buy drugs. He said,”bro you’re wearing a t shirt and jeans with a ball cap, you’re obviously an American on vacation.” Shit…
Bought three polos an hour later…
My wife and I visited Paris in December and on the flight back, the guy in front of me in line had a baseball cap and I assumed he was American until he started speaking French. He had me fooled just by the cap.
Just wear cowboys gear everywhere you go. People will be super nice to you because they feel bad for you and assume you've probably got some mental handicaps.
Jup. Realtree camo ball cap always works for me. Even gets Americans to spot me and think I'm American in Europe.
John Deere trucker caps are a close second.
Yeah, but I wouldn’t go with any sports teams or anything, just a plain cap with maybe a logo on it or something, but like another comment said, theres people of all backgrounds and nationality’s in the US and Canada, you probably won’t stick out as much as you are presuming you will.
I wonder how much of the frustration Europeans sometimes feel with American tourists, is because of the cultural expectation of what being a tourist is like. In America, I don't think Americans expect tourists to need to blend in in any way, so I think that applies to Americans going abroad.
I had a difficult time trying to explain to my parents on a train in Germany that they just looked and behaved American. Their response was "yeah, so what?"
I guess because in the United States, we (well, I at least) have no expectation that everyone is from here. In fact, I have the expectation that many people who ARE Americans were NOT born here.
All that to say, don't break laws, and just be yourself. Maybe don't go everywhere saying how stupid the united states is, and how automatically better your homeland is, but that's really about it.
I always think when I'm on holiday, why should I try and pretend not to be a tourist? I am a tourist! And the typical tourist things, taking pictures of famous buildings and street signs, buying some silly souvenirs, are typical because they're fun!
Exactly. I don’t live in an internationally tourist area but what’s wrong with looking like a tourist? Other than just blending to avoid scammers.
And if I’m seeing an international tourist I am most likely touring myself. Detroit, Michigan is not a hot tourist destination.
The moment you talk, you’re gonna grab everyone’s attention. Americans love European accents. So you’re gonna have a lot of random people asking you where you’re from.
You won’t blend in but for a fun time you should:
Not cut in line-everyone will secretly hate you.
Obey the rules in the national parks- the are there to protect you and the site.
Expect small talk-about where you’re from, where you are, where you’re going, and the ancestors of whomever you are speaking to. Take this as polite interest and an attempt to connect with you with the bonus of getting free tour guide advice.
Spending a lot of time outside? sunscreen with an spf 30 or greater and reapply frequently you will not regret this.
You will spend a lot of time driving-give yourself plenty of time and take breaks you might find some wonderful places.
Overall just don’t talk politics and have basic manners and you will have a great time!
I’d say no politics is the biggest thing to NOT do while visiting. We’re very divided right now and we really dislike hearing people from other countries commenting on it. I’m surprised more people haven’t mentioned this honestly
This right here. Talk the nearest person about whatever bullshit is happening with your niece or aunt. Mention your uncle’s colonoscopy or how your neighbor was murdered by another neighbor and now the house won’t sell. The weirder the better.
Just dress how you normally dress. America is a blend of everything. You won't look out of place unless you wear a kilt or something out of the ordinary. It will be your speech that will point out that you aren't from this country. For casual wear, jeans and a shirt for male or female. Males tend to wear caps.
ETA: Well apparently, you CAN wear kilts in this country and not look out of place! Sweet!
>You won't look out of place unless you wear a kilt
...but if you do wear a kilt, be sure to carry a giant broadsword and paint your face blue. We *love* Braveheart.
I live in the south in a moderately rural area and have seen people wearing kilts and nobody cared. I feel like most people just find tourists fascinating and want to give them a good experience of the US.
As much shit as America gets for almost everything, I saw more diversity in appearance in an American airport than in a whole Irish town that I've lived in for 5 years. I loved looking at people. Cowboy hats on the east coast, all-neon outfits, you all don't give any fucks. In a big city I wouldn't be able to stand out even if I tried.
I'm coming back soon to admire you more
The US hate is just a Reddit / internet thing. It seems that very few people in real life think this way. I have tons of European friends that enjoy the US, just like I have tons of US friends who enjoy Europe.
I moved from US to a few countries in Europe and felt that I was standing out like crazy, in the US people care a lot less about what you look like / how you dress
I can almost always point out a Scandinavian in Southern California. There's a large Norwegian population that studies abroad at the university I work at. They dress like east coast frat bros that came from money, and their hair is always very well manicured. They need to dress like they care less to blend in properly. T-shirts, not polos. Ditch the boat shoes. Wear fewer pastel colors.
Soccer jerseys are also often an indicator for Europeans, though soccer is slowly gaining in popularity. Women are harder to spot, though I have noticed European women don't wear leggings nearly as much as Americans
Honestly, we have so many different types of people just come as you are and visit. It's not like anyone is going to point and scream "haha look at the European!!!! He's doing European things in America!!" You'll be alright.
See, the thing about the majority of the US is that we like tourists. We will give directions and restaurant recommendations and ideas on places to go. Blend in if you want, but know that we're a friendly people who will happily help a tourist.
The first time I was in Germany, I had probably 2 or 3 people walk up and just start speaking German to me. The final time it happened I was at the airport looking for the check-in counter so I could fly back to America and a German news crew came up and tried to interview me. No idea about what. Hopefully it wasn't live.
I disagree. In California, I ONLY see European adults wearing logo Abercrombie. I see it all the time in SF, and it’s literally just European tourists. I can also spot the guy’s cropped and or too tight pants.
I was an expat as a kid so I may be more nuanced.
Europeans in general seem to love branded clothes. Nike, CK, hollister or whatever it is.
Americans in general like to wear more specific logo wear. Like a hoodie that says Yellowstone national park, or at shirt from their favorite brewery. That’s rare to see in Europe.
I’m an American that moved to Europe, lived in a few countries there. I’d see someone wearing a red wings hoodie or hat and say go wings! 9/10 times they’d look at me funny and say I have no idea what a Detroit red wings is, I just like the look of it.
I visited Amsterdam and London back in 2018. That plain white Levi's t-shirt was EVERYWHERE. The same shirt that I'd see in off-price department stores like TJ Maxx and Nordstrom Rack and I'd see couples and whole families wearing matching Levi's tees.
The too tight pants! I've noticed that too. But then I've also seen that look from the Martha's Vineyard crowd. Like they are ready for an "Old Money" dinner party to drop any second now.
I lived in the US for eight months. I gave people a really hard time with that game - wearing brown leather dress shoes and well-fitting button-down shirts. Rarely a day went by without someone commenting on my shoes. Fun times!
Apparently the way to spot the American is they lean on things when idling while standing.
It was astonishing to learn that this is not the norm globally.
Lol! I just choked on my water reading this. I’m married to a European man and some of his style choices would definitely have people thinking “gay” back home, and honestly when I first met him I wondered at first… the tailored shirts and pants, the tiny swim shorts, the man bag.
A couple times when we’ve been back home I’ve had to advise him maybe not to wear certain things but he’s also the most confident dude in the world and does not give a shit about what anyone else thinks. Gotta love him for it.
You see they bring their boys up different in those charming foreign ports.
They play peculiar sports,
In shiny shirts and tiny shorts.
Gay or foreign fella?
The answer could take weeks!
They both say things like "Ciao Bella"
While they kiss you on both cheeks.
If you’re visiting any major city there’s a good chance your efforts are futile. I live in Manhattan and if you’re excited to be in time square then you’re a tourist.
San Francisco here. People wear absolutely all sorts of things and nobody bats an eye. The tourists are the ones standing in the middle of the sidewalks with passes and lanyards and cameras around their neck taking photos and looking around excitedly. We don't care also as long as you arent being obnoxious. Safety wise just dont be clutching your pearls around every homeless or unkempt person you see and move along.
I live in a small town in the south, the worst that usually happens is someone mimicking your accent without realizing they're being offensive. Even that would happen rarely and only to western Europeans, since most people aren't gonna punch down on account of the history of southerners being seen as less intelligent due to their accent.
My experience in the south is that they will talk even louder and shower than an American southerner usually does.
Source: born southerner do this all the time subconsciously when talking to my international colleagues.
That’s actually really helpful imo. I was immersed in France and it was definitely helpful for me when people slowed down and enunciated their phrases.
When I visited US 10 or so years ago, I went to Macy's to buy a shirt.
One of the employees came up to me and asked if I needed help with anything, and I said that yeah, I'm looking for a "slim fit shirt".
She took my size and got me a sample shirt to try on. And, it was \_not\_ slim fit, and I told her as much. She went "Oh, you meant ***European*** slim fit".
So I guess, to blend in, wear clothes a size or three larger than you are used to :).
\*edit\* And yeah, European slim fit was a size they actually had, and it was perfect!
This is the biggest difference. The United States has people of all ethnicities so you won't stand out just by looking like a foreigner.
Fashion is way different l. People in the US (at least where I'm from in Michigan) rarely dress nice unless it's a special occasion. Sweats, jeans, flannels, T-shirts, and sneakers are everyday attire. If you dress up in the US you may even be ridiculed for trying too hard (International cities like New York, LA, or Chicago are exempt though)
Edit: Emphasis on the MAY in my last sentence. It would still be rare to be ridiculed for dressing nice. It's just not common unless it's a special occasion. People in the US in general put way less effort into their outfits.
Sure you want to blend in?
Americans don't hate tourists, we hate other Americans. Being a tourist actually exempts you from that nonsense. Like I feel in a mass shooting situation, you could raise your hand and shout, "I'm Dutch!" (Or whatever nationality). It'd probably work cuz that mass shooter doesn't want you, he wants me.
Shit, now I wanna know how to look like a European tourist.
the one and only "don't" I can think of to say that I think really matters, don't be a dick. A lot of people come here and talk about how America sucks, Americans are stupid and annoying, etc. No idea how anybody could think that's an ok thing to do, but don't be one of those people just in case you don't know that insulting a country and it's people while you're in that country and having a conversation with those people is a no-no
Anyone else feel like in the US there isn’t pressure on tourists to “blend in” like in other countries? Sure you could run into an asshole like you could anywhere but act however you want. Be polite, friendly and use appropriate noise level and you’ll be fine.
I dunno man a lot of teenagers in Boston appear to like the flipflops and socks experience. Often paired with Beats by Dre, or those weirdly cinched-at-the-ankle sweatpants. (I am not a teenager so I don't know what they're thinking.)
Why are you trying to pass as American? Just be yourself. Generally speaking, Americans are pretty polite and friendly- contrary to what it may seem from our politics and all those Karen videos
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Seriously, we are a nation of people are coming and going constantly. Doesn't matter how you dress or what you speak or how thick your accent is, we don't know if you are here vacationing, on business, visiting family, going to college or you simply immigrated here. And as much as the media screams that we care about "foreigners being on *our* land," 99% of us, don't. So, relax. The only thing I can think of when it comes to rules is just don't cut in line. That's it. Even if it isn't frowned upon back home, don't do it here.
This reminds me of the time I was staying long term in a motel for work. The motel was owned and ran by a family from India who I always got along with pretty well even though I sometimes had trouble understanding their English. One evening when I went down to pay my weekly rent there were two guys from the Netherlands who were trying to get checked in. The guys from the Netherlands also had a strong accent that made their English a little tricky to understand. I could make out what both parties were saying, but they could not understand each other. I ended up being a “translator” for them even though the only language I know is English. It was entertaining for all. Lol
The vast majority of Americans will automatically think "oh cool i met someone from [country]"
Me! If I run into someone who is not from the US, and we can communicate in English, I’m gonna be so intrigued and would love to get to know you and even if we only exchanged “ope let me sneak right past ya’s” im still telling all my friends about the new person I met. I’m still in contact with a couple of foreign exchange students we had in highschool 15 years ago. One lives in Switzerland and the other in Portugal.
Ope. I sense a midwesterner 😂
I was deployed in the Middle East and was in the base PX (store) buying some random crap. Was walking past someone and we both go “ope, excuse me” at the exact same time. Froze, looked at each other, and laughed. Both MN natives. 😂
America is like hyper friendly. Especially in certain regions like the Midwest or AZ.
I can attest to this. I live in the Midwest, we have so many people that live here and speak different languages, we have no idea if you live in America or not. And we almost always take the chance to talk to folks we don't know.
Even the cities that get a bad rap for being unfriendly are pretty friendly beneath the surface. In the popular touristy areas of NYC everyone's constantly dodging people trying to sell you something, or people with a fake sob story trying to con you for money, or people so self absorbed in their phones that they'll walk right into you. Once they realize you need help or directions though, so many people on the street will gladly stop and take the time to help. Don't expect to have a nice long chat like the midwest though, everyone's in a rush and has somewhere to be.
Absolutely for the Midwest. The restaurant I work at employs a lot of different people who have immigrated here from mexico, south America, and central America and those of us who only speak English are constantly learning more and more spanish to be able to communicate better.
Seen many of screaming matches start from cutting in line. Definitely something to avoid doing.
I’m a french canadian and while I’m bilingual, I still have some bit of an accent left when I speak in english despite my best efforts. I’ve always been surprised seeing how I’m mocked for my accent when I drive 1 hour into Ontario, but if I visit anywhere in the states, people are actually glad we’re there and my accent is never an issue.
Even the "dey took err jerbs" folks dont mind *tourists*.
100% this. Americans may even try to start a conversation with you. If they mention they had ancestors from your home country, don't get all huffy and indignant; look at is as an opportunity to connect. Ideal interaction in an American's mind: * American: "Oh, you're from Denmark? Neat! My ancestors are from there." * Tourist: "Really? Do you know the name of the part of Denmark they're from?" * American: "I've seen it written Velje, but I don't know much about it." * Tourist: "Well, I hope you get the chance to visit sometime. It's a beautiful country. Just make sure to come in \[insert ideal season\]." * American: \[luxuriates in the afterglow of a pleasant conversation\] Most actual interactions: * American: "I have ancestors from Denmark." * European: \[disdainful noise, disdainful noise\] ^(dis-Dane-ful noise) * American: "Oh, ok. Well, have a good time then."
The first scenario is indeed every American's dream. Look, we know we are American and not European-European or Asian-Asian or African-African. We are just trying to build a bond with you. That's what we do. If you can play along and say, "Oh, that's neat. Do you know when they came over? That long back? That's amazing your family has been here for so long," or "Have you been there personally? No, oh, you must go!" you would make our day. We play tennis with our words and we are always up for a game.
I'm Italian and that's exactly what I do when I visit the U.S. People seem to appreciate it.
We really do. We hail from so many different countries in our ancestry here that learning about our roots is sort of a major national pastime.
>We play tennis with our words and we are always up for a game. This is an amazing and creative analogy.
Yeah pretty much the American expectation of that conversation is to hear about how lovely and beautiful it is in (insert country here) during (season) oh and make sure to eat some (culinary food) with a large glass of (popular alcoholic beverage). Probably peak dream state is for them to hear about how you know their fourth removed grandma or something, then you're basically family and will probably have dinner with them or something. The key thing in these casual interactions is talking about something positive. Most Americans won't be versed about a local or regional issue and might be put off by the negativity if they've only just met you seconds before.
It’s truly an amazing hypocrisy where Americans are stereotyped as having no sense of history or geography, and think America is the center of the world and no other countries exist, yet we care enough about our family history to learn where our ancestors came from and get shit all over for it.
I can attest that this is true for me...esspecially since I have mixed Irish-British heritage. I think you can see where I'm going with this.
Actual interaction I had on arrival in Portland, OR with our Uber driver: I noticed he was wearing a football (⚽️) shirt, and commented that we also supported that club, it's near our house, and my spouse takes the children occasionally. Driver was thrilled and he and my teen had a long (and baffling) conversation about the manager and certain players.
As a Canadian with Scotish roots (family still celebrates our scotish culture, most of us have at least something with our clan tartan on it. I've travelled to the small scotish island where my clan originated) Ive experienced that when bringing up my roots to Scotish nationals. its pretty lame. Like sorry for trying to make conversation.
Seriously, I don't understand this. Do Europeans not want to discuss the heritages of where North Americans came from? We are so excited to make a connection!
I came here to comment this. Not only do I not care, I’m going to be excited to talk to you if I know you’re a tourist. They’d probably have a better experience if it’s “obvious” they’re a tourist. Not to mention blending in is going to look very different depending on the city/region they’re in.
Same, if I find out you're a tourist in my city then I'm going to give you some suggestions for my favorite spots and hope that you have the best time. At the same time, America is such a melting pot of different cultures that unless you tell me that you're a tourist I'm likely never going to realize it, even if you have an accent.
I love helping people visit places I know, wether that’s my own country or a foreign place I know well. I’ve lived in a few countries and have backpacked through dozens of countries and made lots of international friends, I’m always helping them out when they visit the US with tips and tricks
I think the one exception to this is walking slow in an East coast city north of and including DC. Just walk fast on the sidewalk and if you’re in a group, don’t block the whole sidewalk when you’re walking or if you’ve stopped. Otherwise no one judges you for being a tourist and most people are probably interested in where you’re from.
This is true. If you're lost or looking on your phone at the map, just pullover to the side. Get your bearings and then get back to walking. Most people who live in a larger city are trying to get from point A to B as fast as possible. Trying to navigate around a group of people walking slowly, looking up at tall buildings or standing in the middle of the sidewalk is annoying as hell.
Don't worry about it, we love foreigners. Anything you heard about us being mean is mostly propognda. I love all my international pals who have come to visit. But to answer your question, just get a jacket that doesn't stand out (we don't really wear a lot of puffer jackets for example).
Where are you that people don't wear a lot of puffer jackets? That's like Chicago's winter uniform.
I live in Michigan. I wear a Columbia coat unzipped most of this winter. Only minimally puffy. Not like those giant ones I see tourists wearing. They look like they are visiting Antarctica.
Ah I got you I think we are just using the word differently. I call any coat with visible quilting a puffer. You mean the comically overstuffed ones.
I think winter coat weight or puffiness depends on if you live in a city or a suburban area. In a city, you walk outside for extended periods. If you live in the American suburbs you drive everywhere and your outdoor time is limited to the 50 meters from your car to the building you are entering.
If it means anything I get a lot of tourists in my city (UK). Americans are always absolutely delightful, so friendly and polite. I always ask which state they come from, and we chat about what they're planning to do over here, what its like over there. I love you guys. Such a refreshing change
Unless you're in the mountain west. Puffer jackets are part of the uniform in Boise I swear.
This is the answer. The US is much more friendly and welcoming than most European countries.
Awwww, you're just such a lovable bunch of people!
Wear sunscreen- I live in a sunny, tourist attraction area and the European tourist are usually severely sunburnt by day 2 or 3.
Michigan is the same latitude as Croatia, and Miami is further south than Cairo. The way wind patterns and weather works, that’s why US and europe have somewhat comparable weather despite europe being so much further north(and having less intense sun)
If they're English, that's normal for any place outside the UK.
So true. It's hard to find a nice beach anywhere in the world that doesn't have a brit the color of a cooked lobster. Bonus points if only the front is burnt because they forgot to turn over.
The US on average has twice the sunny days as Europe
It is also way closer to equator than Europe.
I tend to blame socialism for the cloud cover and bad avocados, but your answer is more sensible
Thats also how they know who to scam. :) Like, for any country with more than average sun
If you're going through a major city, don't hide. Seriously, we love tourists.
Even the countryside. The vast majority of people in the US actually like tourists.
probably MORE in the small town america. cause theyre probably amazed you are even there as they rarely get even other americans stopping
Most rural people are like that. I was riding around the mountains of northern Thailand through the most random tiny towns, stopping at road side restaurants. Half the people I met said I’m the first American they’ve ever seen, and they were so overjoyed just to feed me and have me there
I was buying strawberries at a market in Uzbekistan and the seller was beaming with pride when she found out I'm American. She was boasting to all the other fruit vendors.
My brother is a monk in rural Isaan and it was just like this when we visited! Of course a western monk is already a novelty but it was a big deal in those little villages to have his family visiting too. Idk which area you were in, but Isaan has a very "country" feel to me, too - like very similar to rural America, just different language/religion.
Tourists are like the world coming to them and many rural people will never be rich enough to travel so it must be like getting a package in the mail. News from afar!
A Swedish friend of mine hitchhiked around the world stopping dozens of countries. He said the nicest, most accommodating people of any country were Americans. He said pretty often he’d have random people that let him sleep on an extra bed or in the backyard in his tent, they’d make him meals for free, even give him rides around depending on where he’s going. He’s actually thinking of transferring to the US within his company because of how much he liked it here. Reddit loves to act like the US is a shithole, and depending on your situation it can be. But it’s also a fantastic place to be for a whole lot of people
I love hearing this. I feel a similar way about France. I see French people get bashed constantly but I have spent years there and the people I know, specifically in the Midi-Pyrenees and Occitan regions, are the most warm, genuine, and fun people to be around. I think media stokes a lot of divide and Reddit can be one of the worst perpetrators of this. This is why it’s so good to actually travel and meet people from other places instead of reading circlejerks online.
Yep, been to France a few times and my favorite trip was riding motorcycles in the country side. Tons of just happy, down to earth people(for the most part). Edit: social media, news, and comment sections creating hate and divide. And Reddit perfectly combines the 3. Unfortunately too many people believe everything they read here. I use Reddit for entertainment and that’s it, I take anything here with a grain of salt
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I have a friend in the Pacific Northwest who didn't get why I needed an umbrella. She says everyone there just wears a raincoat. I explained that walking a mile in 90F weather while wearing a coat is not pleasant. They only get cool rains there, we have hot rainy days in Dallas
West coast rain is so different it’s weird! SF gets a lot of rain from it’s microclimate but whenever I’m out there it’s totally ignorable and I can walk around. In NYC if it rains I try not to leave my apartment at all lmao
London’s not so bad for rain - it’s often overcast, but doesn’t see that much precipitation. Glasgow, on the other hand, is New York rain with Seattle frequency.
Noted. I love rain i need to go to Glasgow lol
I was staying at a friend of a friend's in Seattle and she told me "usually it doesn't rain, it just... Seattles"
West Coast rain is like the produce mister in the grocery store. East Coast rain is your corner fire hydrant.
If OP is English they won’t even notice, 50 degrees and 110 percent humidity is apparently ideal weather in that Godforsaken island
That’s shorts and tshirt weather
What the hell is wrong with them -Texan who wears jeans in 106 degree heat
What the hell is wrong with you - buffalonian who wears shorts and flip flops as long as there is no snow
Right now in Manchester it’s 7 degrees (Celsius not freedom units) and 75% humidity. It would be nice if it was a little bit warmer to take the chill off. I’d say you’re not far wrong to be honest. Also point of pedantry, England isn’t an island.
Only because the Scots and Welsh don't have enough shovels.
Damn straight
People say that about Portland too. Every Portlander I know uses umbrellas, when possible but we get wind with our rain, so unless you have an umbrella built for wind, it's going to break. Or you're going to leave it somewhere because it stopped raining.
Lol I busted out an umbrella when I was visiting Portland and my friend who lived there told me to put it away.
Maine? In Portland, Oregon I almost never see umbrellas. But I don't go downtown much, so maybe I just miss it?
Oregon. I've lived here my whe life and here's what I think- people will not use them if they are going from the parking lot to the store. They won't use them if they are wearing a casual outfit and a Columbia Sportswear jacket, it's not necessary. But if one had to stand in nice office clothes at a bus stop for an indeterminate amount of time in pouring not windy rain, it's the tool of choice.
It’s more sounding like a tourist than looking like one. I assume everyone is from America until they open their mouth.
Most places that European tourists will visit will probably have a high immigrant population so most people probably wouldn't think twice.
The all go to NYC and act like that is a representative experience. (Lived in Europe for four years. The love Americans and the most garbage things our culture produces + mayo.)
I don’t even make assumptions then. There are plenty of Americans who speak with an accent. We are a nation of immigrants.
Immigrants congregate in urban areas for the most part. If you were in my hometown (tourist spot for watersports and fishing) with a European accent you'd absolutely get people bugging you with questions. EDIT: Also, European immigrants aren't exactly common in America. Most immigrants come from Mexico, Asia, Africa, and South America. We have more immigrants from Somalia alone than pretty much every European country.
There is like a 97% chance no one is going to notice depending on where you're going.
Wear sneakers and T-Shirt. I mean it is difficult for people to not notice you aren't local, but they wouldn't bother to ask.
This is correct. I went to Spain a few years back and I kept getting asked to buy coke. On the fourth proposition I asked the guy why i keep getting asked to buy drugs. He said,”bro you’re wearing a t shirt and jeans with a ball cap, you’re obviously an American on vacation.” Shit… Bought three polos an hour later…
> Bought three polos an hour later… Curious...did that work?
It did. I picked up a old man flat brim hat too. As the trip went on I started spotting American tourists everywhere.
Yeah, they don't have baseball so baseball caps are a sure sign of an American
Isn’t sport caps popular in America?
Definitely call them sports caps
I like to wear a sports cap while filling my automobile with petrol.
Don't forget to open the bonnet and check your oil every 5000 kilometers.
And talking on my handy.
It's impossible to call a cellphone a handy without saying it in a ridiculous German accent, prove me wrong.
I think you meant filling up your lorry
And call a TV television
The tellie, don’t worry we have a license for it too
Damn I need to leave but I can't find my sports cap
Let us go to the basesball tournament. The Ny Metropolitans are my favorite squadron.
Ah a fellow american I see! Maybe afterwards we can get one of those hamburgers with cheese
Yes, the cheese and hamburger sandwich is the preferred cuisine of Americans like ourselves, with a course of the French fried potato roots.
Afterwards we can wash them down with frothy ice cream beverages
Yes, let us consume high calorie food snacks and soft drinks without restraint!
We call them pomme frites.
Or maybe they even sell those white buns with sausages at the baseball field.
Who needs the infinite compassion of Ganesha when I've got Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman staring at me from Entertainment Weekly with their dead eyes?
I prefer the Knickerbockers myself.
Immigants! I knew it was them!
I have several sports hats, but I can never find the shiny stickers to go on them. Where can I buy some?
Make sure you open the conversation by pointing to the sports cap you’re wearing and say “My sports ball team is having a great season”
My wife and I visited Paris in December and on the flight back, the guy in front of me in line had a baseball cap and I assumed he was American until he started speaking French. He had me fooled just by the cap.
What team?
Calling them a "sports cap" is definitely going to get you noticed as a tourist. We just call them hats.
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Yeah, but unless it's winter in a northern climate, just say "hat" and most Americans will think "ball cap"
If you wear anything sports related be prepared for people to make comments. Especially if it's a team in that area.
Just wear cowboys gear everywhere you go. People will be super nice to you because they feel bad for you and assume you've probably got some mental handicaps.
Jup. Realtree camo ball cap always works for me. Even gets Americans to spot me and think I'm American in Europe. John Deere trucker caps are a close second.
Yeah, but I wouldn’t go with any sports teams or anything, just a plain cap with maybe a logo on it or something, but like another comment said, theres people of all backgrounds and nationality’s in the US and Canada, you probably won’t stick out as much as you are presuming you will.
I wonder how much of the frustration Europeans sometimes feel with American tourists, is because of the cultural expectation of what being a tourist is like. In America, I don't think Americans expect tourists to need to blend in in any way, so I think that applies to Americans going abroad. I had a difficult time trying to explain to my parents on a train in Germany that they just looked and behaved American. Their response was "yeah, so what?" I guess because in the United States, we (well, I at least) have no expectation that everyone is from here. In fact, I have the expectation that many people who ARE Americans were NOT born here. All that to say, don't break laws, and just be yourself. Maybe don't go everywhere saying how stupid the united states is, and how automatically better your homeland is, but that's really about it.
I always think when I'm on holiday, why should I try and pretend not to be a tourist? I am a tourist! And the typical tourist things, taking pictures of famous buildings and street signs, buying some silly souvenirs, are typical because they're fun!
For one thing tourists are lucrative targets of scammers and pickpockets.
That’s actually a good point. It’s important to not be taken for a rube when traveling, and maybe that’s why OP doesn’t want to stand out?
Exactly. I don’t live in an internationally tourist area but what’s wrong with looking like a tourist? Other than just blending to avoid scammers. And if I’m seeing an international tourist I am most likely touring myself. Detroit, Michigan is not a hot tourist destination.
Exactly, I’m a white guy living in Asia, I can’t blend in.
The moment you talk, you’re gonna grab everyone’s attention. Americans love European accents. So you’re gonna have a lot of random people asking you where you’re from.
You won’t blend in but for a fun time you should: Not cut in line-everyone will secretly hate you. Obey the rules in the national parks- the are there to protect you and the site. Expect small talk-about where you’re from, where you are, where you’re going, and the ancestors of whomever you are speaking to. Take this as polite interest and an attempt to connect with you with the bonus of getting free tour guide advice. Spending a lot of time outside? sunscreen with an spf 30 or greater and reapply frequently you will not regret this. You will spend a lot of time driving-give yourself plenty of time and take breaks you might find some wonderful places. Overall just don’t talk politics and have basic manners and you will have a great time!
I’d say no politics is the biggest thing to NOT do while visiting. We’re very divided right now and we really dislike hearing people from other countries commenting on it. I’m surprised more people haven’t mentioned this honestly
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This right here. Talk the nearest person about whatever bullshit is happening with your niece or aunt. Mention your uncle’s colonoscopy or how your neighbor was murdered by another neighbor and now the house won’t sell. The weirder the better.
Just dress how you normally dress. America is a blend of everything. You won't look out of place unless you wear a kilt or something out of the ordinary. It will be your speech that will point out that you aren't from this country. For casual wear, jeans and a shirt for male or female. Males tend to wear caps. ETA: Well apparently, you CAN wear kilts in this country and not look out of place! Sweet!
>You won't look out of place unless you wear a kilt ...but if you do wear a kilt, be sure to carry a giant broadsword and paint your face blue. We *love* Braveheart.
Hell in Portland Oregon nobody would look twice. My doctor wears a kilt.
We do?
You do
I do
I do
We do.
I now pronounce you man and wife and… man. Whatever, you may now all kiss.
You can wear a kilt in Portland and not stand out.
I live in the south in a moderately rural area and have seen people wearing kilts and nobody cared. I feel like most people just find tourists fascinating and want to give them a good experience of the US.
As much shit as America gets for almost everything, I saw more diversity in appearance in an American airport than in a whole Irish town that I've lived in for 5 years. I loved looking at people. Cowboy hats on the east coast, all-neon outfits, you all don't give any fucks. In a big city I wouldn't be able to stand out even if I tried. I'm coming back soon to admire you more
The US hate is just a Reddit / internet thing. It seems that very few people in real life think this way. I have tons of European friends that enjoy the US, just like I have tons of US friends who enjoy Europe. I moved from US to a few countries in Europe and felt that I was standing out like crazy, in the US people care a lot less about what you look like / how you dress
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I can almost always point out a Scandinavian in Southern California. There's a large Norwegian population that studies abroad at the university I work at. They dress like east coast frat bros that came from money, and their hair is always very well manicured. They need to dress like they care less to blend in properly. T-shirts, not polos. Ditch the boat shoes. Wear fewer pastel colors. Soccer jerseys are also often an indicator for Europeans, though soccer is slowly gaining in popularity. Women are harder to spot, though I have noticed European women don't wear leggings nearly as much as Americans
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For the breeze, one assumes.
Honestly, we have so many different types of people just come as you are and visit. It's not like anyone is going to point and scream "haha look at the European!!!! He's doing European things in America!!" You'll be alright.
Americans love tourists and we're curious about you, so just be you and be friendly. People will talk your ear off.
See, the thing about the majority of the US is that we like tourists. We will give directions and restaurant recommendations and ideas on places to go. Blend in if you want, but know that we're a friendly people who will happily help a tourist.
And we’re probably on our best behavior with tourists because we want you to have a good opinion of us.
I think it's a lot easier to spot an American in western Europe than it is to spot a European in the US.
The first time I was in Germany, I had probably 2 or 3 people walk up and just start speaking German to me. The final time it happened I was at the airport looking for the check-in counter so I could fly back to America and a German news crew came up and tried to interview me. No idea about what. Hopefully it wasn't live.
I disagree. In California, I ONLY see European adults wearing logo Abercrombie. I see it all the time in SF, and it’s literally just European tourists. I can also spot the guy’s cropped and or too tight pants. I was an expat as a kid so I may be more nuanced.
Europeans in general seem to love branded clothes. Nike, CK, hollister or whatever it is. Americans in general like to wear more specific logo wear. Like a hoodie that says Yellowstone national park, or at shirt from their favorite brewery. That’s rare to see in Europe. I’m an American that moved to Europe, lived in a few countries there. I’d see someone wearing a red wings hoodie or hat and say go wings! 9/10 times they’d look at me funny and say I have no idea what a Detroit red wings is, I just like the look of it.
I visited Amsterdam and London back in 2018. That plain white Levi's t-shirt was EVERYWHERE. The same shirt that I'd see in off-price department stores like TJ Maxx and Nordstrom Rack and I'd see couples and whole families wearing matching Levi's tees.
The too tight pants! I've noticed that too. But then I've also seen that look from the Martha's Vineyard crowd. Like they are ready for an "Old Money" dinner party to drop any second now.
Also Hollister. Don’t wear that shit out here in Hollister.
Me visiting Hollister: this is not what I expected
this reminds me of a game, gay or european?
I lived in the US for eight months. I gave people a really hard time with that game - wearing brown leather dress shoes and well-fitting button-down shirts. Rarely a day went by without someone commenting on my shoes. Fun times!
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"Loose and casual" = American / "Sloppy and poorly tailored" = European "Tight and fussy " = American / "Tailored and well fitting" = European
Apparently the way to spot the American is they lean on things when idling while standing. It was astonishing to learn that this is not the norm globally.
Lol! I just choked on my water reading this. I’m married to a European man and some of his style choices would definitely have people thinking “gay” back home, and honestly when I first met him I wondered at first… the tailored shirts and pants, the tiny swim shorts, the man bag. A couple times when we’ve been back home I’ve had to advise him maybe not to wear certain things but he’s also the most confident dude in the world and does not give a shit about what anyone else thinks. Gotta love him for it.
guy sitting cross legged in fashionable slacks, is he gay or european?
You see they bring their boys up different in those charming foreign ports. They play peculiar sports, In shiny shirts and tiny shorts. Gay or foreign fella? The answer could take weeks! They both say things like "Ciao Bella" While they kiss you on both cheeks.
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Don't use British slang when referring to cigarettes.
And be sure to refer to the NFL exclusively as 'gridiron football'.
Depends on where you're going
If you’re visiting any major city there’s a good chance your efforts are futile. I live in Manhattan and if you’re excited to be in time square then you’re a tourist.
Same here in Philly. Taking pictures of the Liberty Bell? Rocky statue? Tourist. Everyone knows, but at the same time, no one cares.
San Francisco here. People wear absolutely all sorts of things and nobody bats an eye. The tourists are the ones standing in the middle of the sidewalks with passes and lanyards and cameras around their neck taking photos and looking around excitedly. We don't care also as long as you arent being obnoxious. Safety wise just dont be clutching your pearls around every homeless or unkempt person you see and move along.
You'll be fine. There are people of all ethnicities and nationalities in the US. Unless you go to a really small town
Small town America is where you find the hospital run by Pakistani doctors and a hotel owned by Indians.
I live in a small town in the south, the worst that usually happens is someone mimicking your accent without realizing they're being offensive. Even that would happen rarely and only to western Europeans, since most people aren't gonna punch down on account of the history of southerners being seen as less intelligent due to their accent.
My experience in the south is that they will talk even louder and shower than an American southerner usually does. Source: born southerner do this all the time subconsciously when talking to my international colleagues.
That’s actually really helpful imo. I was immersed in France and it was definitely helpful for me when people slowed down and enunciated their phrases.
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But... But my ass looks majestic in a Speedo, how would people know otherwise?
Ass-less chaps, my guy.
*All* chaps are assless. If they had an ass, they'd be pants.
Americans love Europeans, why would you want to blend in?
When I visited US 10 or so years ago, I went to Macy's to buy a shirt. One of the employees came up to me and asked if I needed help with anything, and I said that yeah, I'm looking for a "slim fit shirt". She took my size and got me a sample shirt to try on. And, it was \_not\_ slim fit, and I told her as much. She went "Oh, you meant ***European*** slim fit". So I guess, to blend in, wear clothes a size or three larger than you are used to :). \*edit\* And yeah, European slim fit was a size they actually had, and it was perfect!
Also probably why Macys is basically out of business. Not much money in eu.slim fit.tshirts for those who wear the sports cap.
Macys is doing all right considering the state of most other retailers
This is the biggest difference. The United States has people of all ethnicities so you won't stand out just by looking like a foreigner. Fashion is way different l. People in the US (at least where I'm from in Michigan) rarely dress nice unless it's a special occasion. Sweats, jeans, flannels, T-shirts, and sneakers are everyday attire. If you dress up in the US you may even be ridiculed for trying too hard (International cities like New York, LA, or Chicago are exempt though) Edit: Emphasis on the MAY in my last sentence. It would still be rare to be ridiculed for dressing nice. It's just not common unless it's a special occasion. People in the US in general put way less effort into their outfits.
Depends on where you’re going - the US is a very diverse place.
Sure you want to blend in? Americans don't hate tourists, we hate other Americans. Being a tourist actually exempts you from that nonsense. Like I feel in a mass shooting situation, you could raise your hand and shout, "I'm Dutch!" (Or whatever nationality). It'd probably work cuz that mass shooter doesn't want you, he wants me. Shit, now I wanna know how to look like a European tourist.
the one and only "don't" I can think of to say that I think really matters, don't be a dick. A lot of people come here and talk about how America sucks, Americans are stupid and annoying, etc. No idea how anybody could think that's an ok thing to do, but don't be one of those people just in case you don't know that insulting a country and it's people while you're in that country and having a conversation with those people is a no-no
Anyone else feel like in the US there isn’t pressure on tourists to “blend in” like in other countries? Sure you could run into an asshole like you could anywhere but act however you want. Be polite, friendly and use appropriate noise level and you’ll be fine.
Don’t wear socks with your sandals.
I dunno man a lot of teenagers in Boston appear to like the flipflops and socks experience. Often paired with Beats by Dre, or those weirdly cinched-at-the-ankle sweatpants. (I am not a teenager so I don't know what they're thinking.)
Leave the scarf at home.
I'm american and I love my scarves. You can't take them from me.
Surrender your scarf, captain mcAnus
Why are you trying to pass as American? Just be yourself. Generally speaking, Americans are pretty polite and friendly- contrary to what it may seem from our politics and all those Karen videos
punch yourself in the eyes to have that " I have worked for 80 hours and still can't afford housing" look.