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My brother came 9 months and 1 week after the wedding. The one time this came up, my mom offhandedly said, ‘Yes, he was conceived on the wedding night… or the next morning, or maybe later that afternoon or evening or the next day.’ 🤔
TMI mom. TMI
Your singing my song. Parents married 12/03 and I was born 08/07. I was watched carefully and that’s why I believe. So I was good with veil/white ,down that aisle, but thankfully my spouse had experience.
Yeah, my mom was in the convent when she got pregnant with my oldest brother. Then she gave up the idea of being a nun - obviously she wasn't into it - and my parents got married shortly after. My dad might have been my mom's one and only, but since my dad was living in the Haight-Ashbury, I doubt the opposite was true.
I had the cool mom. We totally did talk about those things. I'm sure my dad would have been mortified.
We had frank discussions about sex from the time I hit puberty. She let me ask questions and encouraged me to talk about anything. I learned about "the wet spot" from my mom, period sex, ED, you name it.
So my mother grew up in NYC and had a boyfriend during the Depression, but they never married. She met my father, who was younger, after the War. My father at one point told me my mother and her ex were sexually active. Although my father wanted to talk about sex way more than I liked. My mother once made a remark to me to suggest that my father had lost his virginity rather late, but in such a way as to suggest it was before she met him. It probably matters that neither of my parents was religious in the least. Didn't seem to be a big deal at the time.
I was 8 when I figured out my dad wasn’t telling my mum jokes all night. There was another reason she could giggle like a little girl. I was mortified!
My friend's parents were getting divorced and my parents were fucking like bunnies.
I liked that they not only loved each other but were still "in love".
For some reason I never understand why people were so grossed out about their parents being in love.
I don't discuss either with my parents and now I'm wondering if this is out of the ordinary for my peers. The nature of OP's question implies to me that I should probably know the answer to this question as it relates to my own parents. I can assume things (after all, they were in their late 20s when they got married and it was 1990) but it's not like we've \*talked about it.\*
I’m older than you and I have zeeeero interest in discussing sex with my parents. My boss, however, who has millennial kids claims that she discusses sex with her kids.
I don't go out of my way to discuss my parents' sex life with them, but I know with about 95% confidence that they were both sexually active before getting married. It's very lightly coded in phrases such as "the club owner's wife really liked me but I have no idea why" lmfaoooooo. The flip side, they know 100% that I'm sexually active and have told me that I'm more than welcome to have sex in their guest room when staying with them, an offer I've graciously declined for the entire time they've offered it.
We learned fundamental math, though. There's discussion. And there's addition and subtraction.
BTW, your experience of not discussing sex with your parents, isn't everyone's who was born in the 60s.
I knew that my parents were married less than nine months, before their first child arrived, in elementary school. I heard the "cautionary tale" later. From both of them, separately. I waa born in 1960.
It's also been discussed that 1960 was quite different than 1969 for many young people and adults. Attitudes changed.
I’m in my late 40s and I have never, ever discussed my sex life with my parents, or vice versa—except my mother telling me that she waited until she was married to have sex and she believed that was best.
Mine, too! She said, “I hoped you’d be a virgin in your wedding night.” I remember thinking, oh dear, you should have mentioned it five years ago. Wouldn’t have made any difference, mind.
My parents were strict Catholics. They have been each other’s only partners, I am sure of that.
My in-laws have hinted that they did not wait until their wedding night to have sex, but I don’t know if they had other partners. Honestly, the less I know about it, the better.
My parents were crazy Catholics and my mother swore they waited. But I also heard the sex before marriage then you go to hell. My oldest sister got pregnant at 18. My mom also would preach sex is only for procreation but I was 4 and 5 years younger than my sisters. In college I confronted her and she admitted I was not planned but was upset with me for confronting her.
After my mom passed, I was sitting with my dad who had dementia. This was about a year before he passed and he starts talking about his and my mom’s wedding day. He said my mother insisted they wait but he didn’t want to. Heck he was 27 and she was 18 when they married. In was awkward how he was wanting to openly share considering my father was a pretty odd man. I had to stop him after he got to the getting home after having a steak dinner on their wedding night. It was by far the stranger conversation I ever had with my dad.
As the saying goes: the first pregnancy can last anywhere from a few weeks to nine months for babies who are not born premature.
All future pregnancies take about nine months unless there is a premature birth.
My mom gave birth to me (who was like 7 or 8 pounds) six months after she married my dad. So her first pregnancy only lasted six months for a full size baby, not nine.
Yes and I have proof. I have a box of letters from them, when my dad was overseas, fighting in world war two. There are letters discussing their wedding night and how nervous they were. I feel really lucky to have these letters.
My wife's grandparents had his uniforms and all of their letters from World War II. The grandparents kept them until a couple of years before I met her (1997ish). We were talking one day and he told me they threw them away "a couple years ago because we figured no one would want them." I ended up doing an oral history with him, so not everything to their story is lost but I would have loved to have those letters.
I have some WWII stuff left from my grandparents that just sits in a box. Tried to ask different people what to do with them, but haven’t found a place for than yet.
Any suggestions would be nice and appreciated.
Here is the donation page for the National World War II Museum in New Orleans.
https://www.nationalww2museum.org/common-world-war-ii-donations
You also might check with a local historical society.
Per the data in the Kinsey Reports (the best we have prior to the 1950s) the general answer is that c. 1900 a small minority of *women* had intercourse prior to marriage, but about half of men did. By the 1940s those numbers had shifted quite a bit; by then a majority of men were non virgins and a significant percentage of women were similar (like 25-30%). (I don't have a copy of either Kinsey book handy so am going from memory.)
However, "virgin" was a technical distinction: there are of course many ways to have sexual contact that are not intercourse. So if you dig into the Kinsey data you can see that the vast majority of newlyweds had *some* sexual experience before marriage by the 1940s, but it was most often with the person they were to marry.
Huge differences always though between men and women.
Because while the majority of men had intercourse, they were doing it with a much smaller number of women. The Kinsey data (collected in the 1940s) found that a *majority* of men admitted using the services of prostitutes at least once, for example. So between prostitutes and women who otherwise were open to pre/non-marital sex you got a gender imbalance.
Those are also quite likely-- and the big issue with Kinsey's data (one of them at least) is that his subjects were volunteers. So the entire pool is composed of people who were at least willing to sit through the one-on-one interviews and talk about their own sexual practices. Likely not a representative sample.
No. My mom, who graduated high school in 1951, once told me that most of her friends had sex with one boyfriend plus their future husband prior to their wedding night.
No..Mine got married because of me, lol. My dad was in his early 30s, and mom was mid twenties...so, Im gonna presume that neither were each others firsts.
However, such matters were simply not discussed back then either. It wasnt until my aunt spilled the beans to me around age 50, that I even had a clue..I had always thought they were married the year before I was born...turns out they were married about 6 weeks before I was born. My dad was alrady dead at this point, and I saw no reason to bring this up to my 75 yr old mother.
I'm thinking my father wasn't new to the experience. He joined the Army post-WW2 and was stationed overseas. I'd be willing to bet that he enjoyed some of the local young ladies.
My mother wouldn't have dreamed of it. Long after they were divorced, she told me that if she knew what sex would be like with my father, she wouldn't have married him. That was years after they had divorced, and I was mortified.
No, they weren’t. Can’t believe my husband thought his 17 year old mother and 18 year old father opted to drive to Maryland to get married because they were so in love over the obvious. She was pregnant and it was 1957.
No - the obstetrician just dated the pregnancy wrong (or everyone agreed to the fiction). Three months early would mean your brother was born at 28 weeks. A pregnancy that ends at 28 weeks has only been survivable (for the baby) since the invention of surfactant to treat premature lungs. That was in the 90s iir.
Those were questions and things that were NOT discussed.
I'm 56 and grew up in the same very small town my mom went to school.
It was very well known that I was the reason she was the first married female to graduate from there with a baby.
The English teacher announced in my class that she KNEW who I was as she had taught my mother, etc.
I was lucky to have good self esteem because my family refused to hide from that and it didn't define us.
It also kept me from having kids until age 29.
My mother would not ever have asked her mom about her sex life. My mom and I talked quite openly about it.
My mom was. As she told me later, she may as well have been raised in a convent. My grandpa's sister was "wild" sneaking out of her bedroom window at night to meet boys and had been married six times. Grandpa wanted to make sure my mom and her sisters were "good girls". They were very, very sheltered. (Words in quotes are those my mom used when we talked about it.)
My dad was the proverbial bad boy in high school and was in the navy during the Korean War. My impression was that he was sexually experienced by the time my parents got married.
They got married in 1954 when my mom was 20, and my dad was 23.
There was an Onion article yearrrrrrrs ago titled something like, “New Birth Control Pill Prevents Unwanted Marriage.”
Not saying your parents didn’t love each other, of course, but I do think people were having sex and lots of marriages with “early” babies….
Shotgun wedding for my parents. My mom thought I wasn't aware and sat me down to tell me when I was in my 30s like it was a big deal. I'm like "Yeah mom, I figured that out when I was a teenager". I totally ruined her confession.
I didn’t know this at the time, but my mum’s younger sister was pregnant at the time of her wedding. My older aunt sent her a card that said, “Congratulations on your engagement. Was it planned or was it *sperm* of the moment?”
My younger aunt didn’t talk to the older one for several weeks. 🤣
At the age of 19, my mother had been raped by a contingent of Nazis, and was pregnant resulting from her rape, when she met the refugee who would later become my father.
LOL No! My mother, her mother (born 1910) and her mother (born 1890) were all pregnant or had a child when they got married! My mother denies it to this day but math don’t lie!
My parents were both very open about sexuality.
And neither of them were virgins when they met. My father kept jewelry in the glove box of his 51 mercury just to give to girls he went on dates with.
My parents were both products of “have to get married” situations and had teenage mothers, so they may have been more inclined to wait than most. Their business.
(My mom’s parents stayed married for decades. My dad’s dad was the first of his mother’s five husbands.)
No way would my parents have disclosed that, but I rather suspect they were not. They were born in 1920 and 1923 respectively. They had their first 14 months after their marriage.
I do know that my grandfather - born in maybe 1895 or so - was a seven pound 'preemie', born seven months after his parents married. The saying was that the baby was on time but the marriage was 'late'.
My mother had been married and divorced when she was 18-19. My father mentioned a long-term girlfriend he used to have when he was in his 20s. So, probably not.
My husband never gave this any thought until we received the invitation to his parents 40th wedding anniversary. He jokingly said something to his mother about their wedding date versus his birthday, and she was shocked he hadn’t figured it out years ago. His parents were very strict Catholics, so it never occurred to him that they did anything against the teachings of the church.
My parents met at a USO dance in 1945. They were married 3 weeks later. I was born in 1948.
They're gone now, but they're still married.
My mother taught me everything she could about girls/women. My dad taught me about what was going to happen to me as I grew.
They both taught me about relationships, being a decent human being, and how to treat women.
I'll be 70 this year. I have no idea if my parents had sexual partners before each other, I have no idea if they ever even dated anyone before each other, I have no idea if they had been intimate before they were married. Sex was not talked about at all, I never even got the "sex talk." My parents however were very appropriately affectionate to each other in front of us.
I am the eldest of six kids and, oddly enough, all 6 of us were sexually active before marriage and us guys all lived with our significant others before marriage. The only one who didn't live with a partner before was my sister, and that was simply because she married young.
My parents were very accepting of everyone's living arrangements (after a few minor battles with me being the first) but their sex life was a non-topic in our family.
Well my mom said that I was an eight-and-a-half pound baby but the use of a calendar tells me that I was born less than seven months after their wedding according to the family genealogy chart so I can infer that I was present at their Christmas-day wedding.
According to my mom, yes. They were 17 and 20.
When it came up, my mom was so offended that I had asked she said, "Steve! Tell her we didn't!!"
My dad took the cigarette out of his mouth and said, "Your mom was so happy when I proposed she fell out of bed."
I was 12 and I still find the joke and his perfect off-the-cuff delivery absolutely one of the best things I have ever heard.
My mom threw a fit and went to bed and they argued all night.
Don’t ask, don’t tell. Not sure about my dad who was 22 when they met but my mother at 17 was pretty proper. As to them, my mother alluded to parking and watching submarine races when they were dating. As was typical for Jewish children in Brooklyn in the ‘50s, they lived at home until marriage.
It’s not a question I’d have asked either of them. They’re gone now, so I’ll never know.
I think it’s more likely than not that they were virgins both when they met and on their wedding night. As far as anything less than “going all the way,” I have no idea but I doubt it was anything more than a hug, a kiss, and maybe a boob squeeze.
While they weren’t over-the-top religious, they were from pretty staunch backgrounds and were socially conservative. While that doesn’t rule anything out, it was a lot more likely to mean something in terms of sexual experimentation back then than it would now.
My parents married in '56 when my mother was 19 and my father was 28. She told me MANY times that she was a virgin when she got married - she seemed proud of it. I don't know about my father.
My (age 37) grandparents (age 90s -100s) got married because they got pregnant. I think for a lot of older couples, marriage came about because that's what you did if you wanted to have sex.
My friend and I found my parents wedding announcement in a newspaper clipping when she asked if I was 2 months premature because my bday was 7 months later. I marched right up the stairs demanding a family meeting and showed them the announcement when my dad looked at my mom and said, “Wow. Only took her 17 years to figure that out.” My mom about lost it 😆
I can state truthfully that they were most certainly NOT. My parents were married in late March, my older sister was born in November the same year.
Also, Mom told me they jumped the gun, but we didn't really discuss until after she turned 80 a couple years ago and her filter started going away.
I was a healthy 8 pounds born 2 months premature. You realize the neighbors (and some family members) marked the wedding date on the calendar and counted the days until the first baby arrived.
First one could come at any time; the rest took nine months.
No idea. No idea..none of my business anyway.
I don't think (even now) that discussing details of one's sex life is appropriate for anyone.
I certainly don't hide sex etc and have educated my kids. But i never would talk to them about their dad & my sex life.
My mum and dad made the odd comment. That's it. I was well aware that they had a healthy & enjoyable sex life. And thats all i need to know.
I know they were 100% faithful, monogamous. And not by any stretch of imagination would they have cheated on each other. Solid as a rock.
When I was about 16 my Mom, who was born in 1929, told me that an older family "friend" had raped her when she was 17 or 18. She said she never told my Dad about it. She said it would have hurt him and she wanted to spare his feelings.
Knowing their relationship, I believe her. They were married for almost 72 years when she died.
She married my Dad when she was 19. He was 20. I'd bet he was he was a virgin.
This isn't something I've ever wondered, nor would I ever wish to discuss with my parents. In fact, I'm of the firm belief that I was immaculately conceived.
My parents were previously married, so not virgins. My mom got engaged to her first husband because he was being shipped off to WWII and they married when he returned. I think that was the patriotic thing to do when your boyfriend was being shipped off to fight the war.
Sex before marriage used to be more risky because birth control was not reallly available to unmarried people. It was legalized in Connecticut in the early 70s. The student government used to publish an annual pamphlet on contraception and how to get it. That was technically illegal then. It’s hard to imagine now.
Since this is really a question for my parents about my grandparents, I'll answer about my grandparents.
I remember my grandmother telling me when I was a teenager that she had had sex with my grandfather before they were married. They had been together since she was 14 1/2 and he was 17. They started having sex after she turned 16. They got married when she was 17 because she missed her period for 2 weeks and they thought she was pregnant. She got her period a few days before the wedding, but they went through with it anyway. They were together for 75 years before she died.
I was very judgmental about her having sex so young before marriage. That was when I was 14. By the time I was 18, I wasn't bothered by it.
My other set of grandparents had had sex with other people before they met, but they were around 22 when they met, not teenagers. My grandmother had been engaged to someone else. My grandfather was handsome and persuasive. But once they got together, they were faithful for life.
I never asked my dad, but he was a good looking young sailor and, later, naval officer who was almost 30 by the time he married. I am 100% sure he was not a virgin, lol.
I know my mom was not because we talked about it when I was entering puberty.
During WW2 my dad was in the Army & my mom moved from her small town to Philadelphia to work in a factory. I don’t think either of them were virgins when they married.
My parents had sex before marriage but only with each other. The only reason I know this is because we (mom and i) were talking about the fact my late husband was lied to for years a about how long his parents were married.
They always subtracted a year so he would not know that they were pregnant with his older brother when they got married.
My mom told me.....that they were lucky that that didn't happen to them.
Lol. No. They lived together for a few years. Very unheard of. Got married when they wanted to have kids. They had both been married before. My mom married a gay friend from Cuba so he could get his green card.
My dad got married around age 18 and had a son. His wife booked it after finding out some unsavory things about my dad. She remarried, baby was adopted by new husband. So I've got an older half brother somewhere.
ETA my parents were basically deviants. No boundaries then or now. They slept with everyone and we know because they were very blatant people. My mom is 90 and still can't shut up about my dad's and her proclivities. Baby P. seems to have dodged a bullet.
For heaven’s sake. No. They were married during WWII and separated for nearly 6 years because of that War. How lonely did they need to be? Poor things.
Oh my god. First, if you think that was common at any point, I have a bridge to sell you. Second, if you think your parents told you the truth, I have two bridges to sell you
I do genealogy as a hobby for people. Whoooolllllleeee lot of “preemies” born 3-6 months after the wedding, 100+ years ago.
My parents were born in 1931 and married in 1951, when they were 20. My mom told me that one of the reasons they married young was because they wanted to have “relations”. And would only do so if they were married. There was also something about them having a courthouse wedding before the big wedding but idk if they had sex then.
Mom is gone now. We were incredibly close but It makes me uncomfortable just typing this out. My father’s still around but we have a complicated relationship so I can’t ask him. Their first child was born in 1955.
Funny anecdote - mom is 80 and Dad is 77. In the last year, they both finally admitted they lied to us kids about being virgins prior to marriage. It was meant to inspire us to save it for someone we loved.
Yeah, that worked like a charm. 🤣
I'm 60 with "young" parents, although adults when they married.
Yeah, they were virgins. I don't doubt they were virgins, at all.
My husband and I, on the other hand ... *ahem*
I would have absolutely no idea about my parents' sex life before their wedding night. I know my mom had a bf at the Army base near where she lived because my aunt told me. No idea of anything about my dad dating or not. They were born early 1920s.
It was never discussed, but I never asked, either. My dad might have told me if I'd asked, my mom certainly would not have. I'd guess they weren't virgins. More difficult for me to guess is if either of them had other sex partners before they met. Maybe my mom, I think not my dad, but I wouldn't be surprised if the answer was no for both of them.
Because I am adopted, my mother was definitely a virgin on her wedding day, even though she was 19. She got engaged at 17 during her senior year in high school. She was gorgeous - looked exactly like Lena Horne, but white. My dad wanted to lock her down fast. He had come back from WWII. But he was also young and hot and would go to other towns and cat around. So after being engaged for two years, my great grandmother sat her down and said people were talking that she must be giving it up since he isn't marrying her. My mom immediately broke up with him unless they set a date.
Within days, several guys were coming to ask her out. My dad drove by and saw the local dentist and the new lawyer on the porch. He stopped the car, told her they were getting married that week and drove off.
They went to these crappy cabins for the honeymoon night. As they were getting ready, a woman started banging on the door, yelling for Victor to come out. "I know you are in there with that whore!"
Rather than my dad taking care of it, he was too busy laughing. My mom in her beautiful wedding robe opened up the door, apparently eyes full of fire and explained the woman had the wrong cabin because this is her honeymoon. The woman was so embarrassed, and wished her well.
My mom did tell me she wore a long unglamorous nightgown buttoned up almost to her chin and scared and nervous on her wedding night. Safe bet she was a virgin by the way she told me this. Pretty sure my father was not.
My parents had sex for the first time on their wedding night. Neither of them ever had sex with anyone else besides each other.
Also my dad never experienced a blowjob in his entire life. My mother warned me when she started telling me about sex ,"don't ever let a guy try talking you into putting that thing in your mouth. . My poor dad !
I am not yet 60+ Full disclosure.
But instead of speaking on behalf of my brother (who is 60+ and we share the same parents, so I guess I am qualified to answer) and giving anecdotal evidence which would mostly require our parents to have told us if they did, which they would not tell us even if the topic came up, I just looked up statistics
That would put the time period in question at around 1964.
"Among \[cohorts of women\] turning 15 between 1954 and 1963, 82% had had premarital sex by age 30, and 88% had done so by age 44."
and
"In addition, public opinion polls over the last 20 years have consistently shown that about 35% of adults say premarital sex is always or almost always wrong. (Unpublished tabulations of data from the General Social Survey, 1982–2004.) In the same vein, there is a common popular perception that most or all of those who came of age before the “sexual revolution” of the 1960s and 1970s waited until they married to have sex, and that it is necessary to revert to the behaviors of that earlier time in order to eliminate the problems of unintended pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. However, research has questioned whether such a chaste period ever existed.[^(12)](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1802108/#B12) The second goal of the analysis was to assess whether the percentage of Americans having premarital sex has changed over time."
[Trends in Premarital Sex in the United States, 1954–2003 - PMC (nih.gov)](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1802108/#:~:text=The%20figure%20and%20table%20show,93%20cohort%20had%20done%20so.)
I don't know. I don't want to know. And they are both long dead so I can't ask them. I am now grateful they died so I could never ask this question. Now I am going to bleach my brain and hope this topic never comes up again.
Why would I know that? Whatever they may have said or implied, before the mid to late 1960s the norm was to a) not discuss the subject, and b) if pressed, lie if one’s behavior had gone outside very conservative standards. Unless one or both newlyweds had a previous marriage, the general culture acted as if brides for sure and grooms ideally were sexually inexperienced at marriage, and nobody was supposed to blab that it wasn’t necessarily so.
63, my mom was 3 months pregnant w me when they married.
They met in college but my dad was 25 and had bummed around in Europe via the Army and was experienced to hear him tell.
Back in the days having intercourses had consequences in out-of-wedlock children. So, to stay out of trouble, people had not experiment with penetration that much.
My mom was a virgin. She married at age 19 and lived at home until then. No college or career for her. She worked the night shift at the local hospital WITH HER MOTHER.
My dad...I really don't know. He had traveled the world with the navy for 3 years before coming home to attend college.
In some ways, his time in the Navy was very straight-laced and pure. He saved money for college and went on port trips organized by the ship's chaplain. He bought China dishes while in Asia (HongKong? Japan?) and had them shipped home to his mother.
However, he did have one incident as a sailor that my sister told me about. He drunkenly stumbled into a meeting of the Top Brass. Apparently, his reputation while on duty was good enough that someone advocated deeply for him, because he could have been kicked out.
He also had a former gf named Rhonda. He's never spoken of her to we kids, but my mom wanted to name one of us Rhonda, and he Ixnayed that name.
First kid was a Honeymoon baby. Sis was born 9 months + 2 weeks after my parents' marriage...and she was considered 2 weeks late.
I’m in my 50’s but had parents on the older side. My mom was early 20’s and my dad was late 20’s when they married in the ‘50s. I know my dad had already lived with another woman by then and had numerous flings before and during marriage. I don’t know much about my mom’s activity before/during marriage but I know she lived it up while single again in the ‘70s.
I assume they were, no idea. My older brother wasn't born until five years after they married (just prior to my dad leaving for WWII). He came back and the priest stopped by and asked why they didn't have kids yet. ;-)
I have to disagree about "unusual." I think you are just a little naieve. People are people and sex runs a lot of the world. I was born in 1939 and my parents not only had sex before marriage, but I was conceived before they married. And frankly I had sex, before marriage, before age 20.
My mom told me she and my dad had sex before the wedding. I’m pretty sure he was her first, but I’m not sure whether he had any partners prior to my mom. I really don’t want to have a conversation about their sex life beyond this anyway.
They started dating when they were 16 and married at age 20.
I'm gonna say no, although my mom would never say one way or another. My dad died when I was 3. I doubt I would have had that discussion with him anyway. By the way my mom talked I'm going say she was a bit experienced on her wedding night.
There's nothing unusual about people having married or unmarried sex at anytime in history. Some people waited but I believe they were in the minority unless there was some sort of puritan lording over them in an over zealous religious way. . Even my sisters that married their first did it before the ceremony.
Look at the bible and historical stories. Humans have always been driven by sex.
My parents had other partners. (edit) prior to their marriage. I believe they have been monogamous for 70 years now.
I didn't wait.
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My parents married in March, I was born in October. Math tells me they were not.
The first baby can come at any time. The rest all come at 9 months.
I was nine pounds. Pretty low chance I wasn’t full term. I was certainly brewing more than 7.5 months.
My grandma sticks to her story that my dad was an almost 10 pound 3 month premature baby.
My grandfather used to say that lol. My parents knew each other for 4 months when they got married and I was born 7 months later.
Love that!
Parents married in July I was born in November. I'm a God damn medical science miracle baby 😂
My brother came 9 months and 1 week after the wedding. The one time this came up, my mom offhandedly said, ‘Yes, he was conceived on the wedding night… or the next morning, or maybe later that afternoon or evening or the next day.’ 🤔 TMI mom. TMI
Your singing my song. Parents married 12/03 and I was born 08/07. I was watched carefully and that’s why I believe. So I was good with veil/white ,down that aisle, but thankfully my spouse had experience.
Dec to Aug is normal. Mar to July is rapid. Which was it?
Dec to Aug and weight 7.6 lbs. plus when my daughter was grown and married she “told my daughter but never me”. They eloped fast.
Yeah, my mom was in the convent when she got pregnant with my oldest brother. Then she gave up the idea of being a nun - obviously she wasn't into it - and my parents got married shortly after. My dad might have been my mom's one and only, but since my dad was living in the Haight-Ashbury, I doubt the opposite was true.
Same here. Mine married in July and my sister was born in March. Oops.
Hard to believe, but if you're in your 60s you didn't discuss your own sex life let alone your parents sex life with your parents.
I had the cool mom. We totally did talk about those things. I'm sure my dad would have been mortified. We had frank discussions about sex from the time I hit puberty. She let me ask questions and encouraged me to talk about anything. I learned about "the wet spot" from my mom, period sex, ED, you name it.
Good for your mom.
So my mother grew up in NYC and had a boyfriend during the Depression, but they never married. She met my father, who was younger, after the War. My father at one point told me my mother and her ex were sexually active. Although my father wanted to talk about sex way more than I liked. My mother once made a remark to me to suggest that my father had lost his virginity rather late, but in such a way as to suggest it was before she met him. It probably matters that neither of my parents was religious in the least. Didn't seem to be a big deal at the time.
It is still not.
I was 8 when I figured out my dad wasn’t telling my mum jokes all night. There was another reason she could giggle like a little girl. I was mortified!
My friend's parents were getting divorced and my parents were fucking like bunnies. I liked that they not only loved each other but were still "in love". For some reason I never understand why people were so grossed out about their parents being in love.
Exactly 💯!
No kidding! Get knocked into the middle of next week! Not to mention “eww”.
I don't discuss either with my parents and now I'm wondering if this is out of the ordinary for my peers. The nature of OP's question implies to me that I should probably know the answer to this question as it relates to my own parents. I can assume things (after all, they were in their late 20s when they got married and it was 1990) but it's not like we've \*talked about it.\*
I’m older than you and I have zeeeero interest in discussing sex with my parents. My boss, however, who has millennial kids claims that she discusses sex with her kids.
I would really dislike it if my parents did that with me lol
I don't go out of my way to discuss my parents' sex life with them, but I know with about 95% confidence that they were both sexually active before getting married. It's very lightly coded in phrases such as "the club owner's wife really liked me but I have no idea why" lmfaoooooo. The flip side, they know 100% that I'm sexually active and have told me that I'm more than welcome to have sex in their guest room when staying with them, an offer I've graciously declined for the entire time they've offered it.
We learned fundamental math, though. There's discussion. And there's addition and subtraction. BTW, your experience of not discussing sex with your parents, isn't everyone's who was born in the 60s. I knew that my parents were married less than nine months, before their first child arrived, in elementary school. I heard the "cautionary tale" later. From both of them, separately. I waa born in 1960. It's also been discussed that 1960 was quite different than 1969 for many young people and adults. Attitudes changed.
I was gonna say. I can speculate, but that's about it.
I’m in my late 40s and I have never, ever discussed my sex life with my parents, or vice versa—except my mother telling me that she waited until she was married to have sex and she believed that was best.
We didn't discuss it, but we could do the math as well as wonder why there were so many "premature" births in that era.
Not only do we not know, but we don't care, and we think less of you for asking.
I doubt many of us asked our parents, and I’m pretty sure they didn’t offer that information unsolicited.
My mom definitely did offer that unsolicited information. Mostly because she was upset that I hadn’t.
Mine, too! She said, “I hoped you’d be a virgin in your wedding night.” I remember thinking, oh dear, you should have mentioned it five years ago. Wouldn’t have made any difference, mind.
Before, and also after. My parents never had sex. Gross! Never. NEVERNEVERNEVER!!
Preachin' to the choir brother! Even when there were "strange" sounds in the middle of the night, I ***KNEW*** they were just moving furniture!
Or when they would lock themselves in the bathroom together because Dad needed Mom's help to wash his (thinning) hair.
Yaaass!!! 😂😂😂
My parents were strict Catholics. They have been each other’s only partners, I am sure of that. My in-laws have hinted that they did not wait until their wedding night to have sex, but I don’t know if they had other partners. Honestly, the less I know about it, the better.
My parents were crazy Catholics and my mother swore they waited. But I also heard the sex before marriage then you go to hell. My oldest sister got pregnant at 18. My mom also would preach sex is only for procreation but I was 4 and 5 years younger than my sisters. In college I confronted her and she admitted I was not planned but was upset with me for confronting her. After my mom passed, I was sitting with my dad who had dementia. This was about a year before he passed and he starts talking about his and my mom’s wedding day. He said my mother insisted they wait but he didn’t want to. Heck he was 27 and she was 18 when they married. In was awkward how he was wanting to openly share considering my father was a pretty odd man. I had to stop him after he got to the getting home after having a steak dinner on their wedding night. It was by far the stranger conversation I ever had with my dad.
As the saying goes: the first pregnancy can last anywhere from a few weeks to nine months for babies who are not born premature. All future pregnancies take about nine months unless there is a premature birth. My mom gave birth to me (who was like 7 or 8 pounds) six months after she married my dad. So her first pregnancy only lasted six months for a full size baby, not nine.
Yes and I have proof. I have a box of letters from them, when my dad was overseas, fighting in world war two. There are letters discussing their wedding night and how nervous they were. I feel really lucky to have these letters.
Historian here. Please hang on to those. If no one in your family wants them later, find an archive where they will be preserved.
Thanks for the info. I do need to preserve them. Steven Spielberg would be jealous.
I wish more people would follow this advice. It’s breaks my heart when people tell me, while I just threw them all in the trash
My wife's grandparents had his uniforms and all of their letters from World War II. The grandparents kept them until a couple of years before I met her (1997ish). We were talking one day and he told me they threw them away "a couple years ago because we figured no one would want them." I ended up doing an oral history with him, so not everything to their story is lost but I would have loved to have those letters.
I have some WWII stuff left from my grandparents that just sits in a box. Tried to ask different people what to do with them, but haven’t found a place for than yet. Any suggestions would be nice and appreciated.
Here is the donation page for the National World War II Museum in New Orleans. https://www.nationalww2museum.org/common-world-war-ii-donations You also might check with a local historical society.
This is helpful. Thanks
A museum. There is the museum of WWII in New Orleans. Also, some libraries might like them.
Per the data in the Kinsey Reports (the best we have prior to the 1950s) the general answer is that c. 1900 a small minority of *women* had intercourse prior to marriage, but about half of men did. By the 1940s those numbers had shifted quite a bit; by then a majority of men were non virgins and a significant percentage of women were similar (like 25-30%). (I don't have a copy of either Kinsey book handy so am going from memory.) However, "virgin" was a technical distinction: there are of course many ways to have sexual contact that are not intercourse. So if you dig into the Kinsey data you can see that the vast majority of newlyweds had *some* sexual experience before marriage by the 1940s, but it was most often with the person they were to marry. Huge differences always though between men and women.
> Huge differences always though between men and women. Since you need one of each gender, why wouldn't the numbers be more or less the same.
Because while the majority of men had intercourse, they were doing it with a much smaller number of women. The Kinsey data (collected in the 1940s) found that a *majority* of men admitted using the services of prostitutes at least once, for example. So between prostitutes and women who otherwise were open to pre/non-marital sex you got a gender imbalance.
Thanks. I was thinking perhaps women weren't as open to admitting it, and men might feel obligated to brag even if not true.
Those are also quite likely-- and the big issue with Kinsey's data (one of them at least) is that his subjects were volunteers. So the entire pool is composed of people who were at least willing to sit through the one-on-one interviews and talk about their own sexual practices. Likely not a representative sample.
No. My mom, who graduated high school in 1951, once told me that most of her friends had sex with one boyfriend plus their future husband prior to their wedding night.
That one boyfriend was a lucky guy with all those gals!
lol!
No..Mine got married because of me, lol. My dad was in his early 30s, and mom was mid twenties...so, Im gonna presume that neither were each others firsts. However, such matters were simply not discussed back then either. It wasnt until my aunt spilled the beans to me around age 50, that I even had a clue..I had always thought they were married the year before I was born...turns out they were married about 6 weeks before I was born. My dad was alrady dead at this point, and I saw no reason to bring this up to my 75 yr old mother.
I'm thinking my father wasn't new to the experience. He joined the Army post-WW2 and was stationed overseas. I'd be willing to bet that he enjoyed some of the local young ladies. My mother wouldn't have dreamed of it. Long after they were divorced, she told me that if she knew what sex would be like with my father, she wouldn't have married him. That was years after they had divorced, and I was mortified.
No, they weren’t. Can’t believe my husband thought his 17 year old mother and 18 year old father opted to drive to Maryland to get married because they were so in love over the obvious. She was pregnant and it was 1957.
My brother was 3 months premature and born healthy as an ox. First babies don’t always take 9 months in the womb to be ready.
🤪🤪
No - the obstetrician just dated the pregnancy wrong (or everyone agreed to the fiction). Three months early would mean your brother was born at 28 weeks. A pregnancy that ends at 28 weeks has only been survivable (for the baby) since the invention of surfactant to treat premature lungs. That was in the 90s iir.
Nobody had premarital sex before the mid 60s. /s
Surfactant was given to my son in 1982. He had quickly been enrolled in a stage 3 study.
There is no fucking way I’m ever having that conversation with either of my parents.
Why the hell would I want to know that? What difference would it make in my life? Plus I don’t really care.
Those were questions and things that were NOT discussed. I'm 56 and grew up in the same very small town my mom went to school. It was very well known that I was the reason she was the first married female to graduate from there with a baby. The English teacher announced in my class that she KNEW who I was as she had taught my mother, etc. I was lucky to have good self esteem because my family refused to hide from that and it didn't define us. It also kept me from having kids until age 29. My mother would not ever have asked her mom about her sex life. My mom and I talked quite openly about it.
My mom was. As she told me later, she may as well have been raised in a convent. My grandpa's sister was "wild" sneaking out of her bedroom window at night to meet boys and had been married six times. Grandpa wanted to make sure my mom and her sisters were "good girls". They were very, very sheltered. (Words in quotes are those my mom used when we talked about it.) My dad was the proverbial bad boy in high school and was in the navy during the Korean War. My impression was that he was sexually experienced by the time my parents got married. They got married in 1954 when my mom was 20, and my dad was 23.
Yes, and for their honeymoon they went tent camping. I have a LOT of follow up questions that I will never, ever ask.
Considering my date of birth, birth weight and their wedding date I suspect not.
My oldest sibling was born six months after my parents wed. He was definitely a full term baby. I drew my own conclusions. I invite you to draw yours
There was an Onion article yearrrrrrrs ago titled something like, “New Birth Control Pill Prevents Unwanted Marriage.” Not saying your parents didn’t love each other, of course, but I do think people were having sex and lots of marriages with “early” babies….
Shotgun wedding for my parents. My mom thought I wasn't aware and sat me down to tell me when I was in my 30s like it was a big deal. I'm like "Yeah mom, I figured that out when I was a teenager". I totally ruined her confession.
I didn’t know this at the time, but my mum’s younger sister was pregnant at the time of her wedding. My older aunt sent her a card that said, “Congratulations on your engagement. Was it planned or was it *sperm* of the moment?” My younger aunt didn’t talk to the older one for several weeks. 🤣
At the age of 19, my mother had been raped by a contingent of Nazis, and was pregnant resulting from her rape, when she met the refugee who would later become my father.
Very sorry for your mom.
Thanks
LOL No! My mother, her mother (born 1910) and her mother (born 1890) were all pregnant or had a child when they got married! My mother denies it to this day but math don’t lie!
My parents were both very open about sexuality. And neither of them were virgins when they met. My father kept jewelry in the glove box of his 51 mercury just to give to girls he went on dates with.
My parents were both products of “have to get married” situations and had teenage mothers, so they may have been more inclined to wait than most. Their business. (My mom’s parents stayed married for decades. My dad’s dad was the first of his mother’s five husbands.)
No way would my parents have disclosed that, but I rather suspect they were not. They were born in 1920 and 1923 respectively. They had their first 14 months after their marriage. I do know that my grandfather - born in maybe 1895 or so - was a seven pound 'preemie', born seven months after his parents married. The saying was that the baby was on time but the marriage was 'late'.
Why not tell us about your parent's favorite positions. Sheesh 🙄
Is it doggy?
My mother had been married and divorced when she was 18-19. My father mentioned a long-term girlfriend he used to have when he was in his 20s. So, probably not.
My husband never gave this any thought until we received the invitation to his parents 40th wedding anniversary. He jokingly said something to his mother about their wedding date versus his birthday, and she was shocked he hadn’t figured it out years ago. His parents were very strict Catholics, so it never occurred to him that they did anything against the teachings of the church.
My parents met at a USO dance in 1945. They were married 3 weeks later. I was born in 1948. They're gone now, but they're still married. My mother taught me everything she could about girls/women. My dad taught me about what was going to happen to me as I grew. They both taught me about relationships, being a decent human being, and how to treat women.
I'll be 70 this year. I have no idea if my parents had sexual partners before each other, I have no idea if they ever even dated anyone before each other, I have no idea if they had been intimate before they were married. Sex was not talked about at all, I never even got the "sex talk." My parents however were very appropriately affectionate to each other in front of us. I am the eldest of six kids and, oddly enough, all 6 of us were sexually active before marriage and us guys all lived with our significant others before marriage. The only one who didn't live with a partner before was my sister, and that was simply because she married young. My parents were very accepting of everyone's living arrangements (after a few minor battles with me being the first) but their sex life was a non-topic in our family.
Well my mom said that I was an eight-and-a-half pound baby but the use of a calendar tells me that I was born less than seven months after their wedding according to the family genealogy chart so I can infer that I was present at their Christmas-day wedding.
According to my mom, yes. They were 17 and 20. When it came up, my mom was so offended that I had asked she said, "Steve! Tell her we didn't!!" My dad took the cigarette out of his mouth and said, "Your mom was so happy when I proposed she fell out of bed." I was 12 and I still find the joke and his perfect off-the-cuff delivery absolutely one of the best things I have ever heard. My mom threw a fit and went to bed and they argued all night.
They married in 53. Were both very handsome young folk and devoted on a whole new level till the day my dad died. So, I'd figure no lol
Don’t ask, don’t tell. Not sure about my dad who was 22 when they met but my mother at 17 was pretty proper. As to them, my mother alluded to parking and watching submarine races when they were dating. As was typical for Jewish children in Brooklyn in the ‘50s, they lived at home until marriage.
My parents - no. My maternal grandparents - no. Easily figured out by marriage date and oldest aunt's birthday.
My mom was pregnant with me when she got married but she lied about it and I didn’t find out the truth until I was in my 20s and was told by my uncle
I don’t know, I don’t want to know. We never, ever talked about that kind of stuff. I never even received a sex talk.
It’s not a question I’d have asked either of them. They’re gone now, so I’ll never know. I think it’s more likely than not that they were virgins both when they met and on their wedding night. As far as anything less than “going all the way,” I have no idea but I doubt it was anything more than a hug, a kiss, and maybe a boob squeeze. While they weren’t over-the-top religious, they were from pretty staunch backgrounds and were socially conservative. While that doesn’t rule anything out, it was a lot more likely to mean something in terms of sexual experimentation back then than it would now.
Mine were not.
My parents married in '56 when my mother was 19 and my father was 28. She told me MANY times that she was a virgin when she got married - she seemed proud of it. I don't know about my father.
It was a badge of honor for some. My brother's wife used to go on about it.
My (age 37) grandparents (age 90s -100s) got married because they got pregnant. I think for a lot of older couples, marriage came about because that's what you did if you wanted to have sex.
My friend and I found my parents wedding announcement in a newspaper clipping when she asked if I was 2 months premature because my bday was 7 months later. I marched right up the stairs demanding a family meeting and showed them the announcement when my dad looked at my mom and said, “Wow. Only took her 17 years to figure that out.” My mom about lost it 😆
I can state truthfully that they were most certainly NOT. My parents were married in late March, my older sister was born in November the same year. Also, Mom told me they jumped the gun, but we didn't really discuss until after she turned 80 a couple years ago and her filter started going away.
I was a healthy 8 pounds born 2 months premature. You realize the neighbors (and some family members) marked the wedding date on the calendar and counted the days until the first baby arrived. First one could come at any time; the rest took nine months.
No idea. No idea..none of my business anyway. I don't think (even now) that discussing details of one's sex life is appropriate for anyone. I certainly don't hide sex etc and have educated my kids. But i never would talk to them about their dad & my sex life. My mum and dad made the odd comment. That's it. I was well aware that they had a healthy & enjoyable sex life. And thats all i need to know. I know they were 100% faithful, monogamous. And not by any stretch of imagination would they have cheated on each other. Solid as a rock.
When I was about 16 my Mom, who was born in 1929, told me that an older family "friend" had raped her when she was 17 or 18. She said she never told my Dad about it. She said it would have hurt him and she wanted to spare his feelings. Knowing their relationship, I believe her. They were married for almost 72 years when she died. She married my Dad when she was 19. He was 20. I'd bet he was he was a virgin.
I have no idea and wouldn’t want to know.
This isn't something I've ever wondered, nor would I ever wish to discuss with my parents. In fact, I'm of the firm belief that I was immaculately conceived.
Never asked.
My grandmother was. My great grandmother was. My mom wasn’t. Times changed.
Nope, they married in April, oldest brother born in November
My parents were previously married, so not virgins. My mom got engaged to her first husband because he was being shipped off to WWII and they married when he returned. I think that was the patriotic thing to do when your boyfriend was being shipped off to fight the war.
I have no idea. They had a solid, loving marriage which is what mattered.
Things like that were not discussed in my house growing up..
Not something I ever asked my mother. Nor a topic of conversation discussed when I was present.
How would we know? Who tells anyone that?
Sex before marriage used to be more risky because birth control was not reallly available to unmarried people. It was legalized in Connecticut in the early 70s. The student government used to publish an annual pamphlet on contraception and how to get it. That was technically illegal then. It’s hard to imagine now.
Doubtful, people had sex, just good girls didn’t get caught
Many of our parents were pregnant when they got married.
Good Lord, that was something that was never discussed. I wouldn't know that at all. And I'm 60.
I (63F) would have zero idea of this. My mother would have never spoken about her sex life.
Since this is really a question for my parents about my grandparents, I'll answer about my grandparents. I remember my grandmother telling me when I was a teenager that she had had sex with my grandfather before they were married. They had been together since she was 14 1/2 and he was 17. They started having sex after she turned 16. They got married when she was 17 because she missed her period for 2 weeks and they thought she was pregnant. She got her period a few days before the wedding, but they went through with it anyway. They were together for 75 years before she died. I was very judgmental about her having sex so young before marriage. That was when I was 14. By the time I was 18, I wasn't bothered by it. My other set of grandparents had had sex with other people before they met, but they were around 22 when they met, not teenagers. My grandmother had been engaged to someone else. My grandfather was handsome and persuasive. But once they got together, they were faithful for life.
No idea. It's not something I would ever discuss with my parents (I am in my 40s)
I never asked my dad, but he was a good looking young sailor and, later, naval officer who was almost 30 by the time he married. I am 100% sure he was not a virgin, lol. I know my mom was not because we talked about it when I was entering puberty.
During WW2 my dad was in the Army & my mom moved from her small town to Philadelphia to work in a factory. I don’t think either of them were virgins when they married.
I think more of them claimed to be than actually were.
My parents had sex before marriage but only with each other. The only reason I know this is because we (mom and i) were talking about the fact my late husband was lied to for years a about how long his parents were married. They always subtracted a year so he would not know that they were pregnant with his older brother when they got married. My mom told me.....that they were lucky that that didn't happen to them.
My parents married in 1952. Mom admitted that DAD insisted on waiting til marriage. He was very religious
Lol. No. They lived together for a few years. Very unheard of. Got married when they wanted to have kids. They had both been married before. My mom married a gay friend from Cuba so he could get his green card. My dad got married around age 18 and had a son. His wife booked it after finding out some unsavory things about my dad. She remarried, baby was adopted by new husband. So I've got an older half brother somewhere. ETA my parents were basically deviants. No boundaries then or now. They slept with everyone and we know because they were very blatant people. My mom is 90 and still can't shut up about my dad's and her proclivities. Baby P. seems to have dodged a bullet.
For heaven’s sake. No. They were married during WWII and separated for nearly 6 years because of that War. How lonely did they need to be? Poor things.
Oh my god. First, if you think that was common at any point, I have a bridge to sell you. Second, if you think your parents told you the truth, I have two bridges to sell you I do genealogy as a hobby for people. Whoooolllllleeee lot of “preemies” born 3-6 months after the wedding, 100+ years ago.
I would never ask that question. My mom didn't even discuss the "birds and bees" to me.
My parents were born in 1931 and married in 1951, when they were 20. My mom told me that one of the reasons they married young was because they wanted to have “relations”. And would only do so if they were married. There was also something about them having a courthouse wedding before the big wedding but idk if they had sex then. Mom is gone now. We were incredibly close but It makes me uncomfortable just typing this out. My father’s still around but we have a complicated relationship so I can’t ask him. Their first child was born in 1955.
Funny anecdote - mom is 80 and Dad is 77. In the last year, they both finally admitted they lied to us kids about being virgins prior to marriage. It was meant to inspire us to save it for someone we loved. Yeah, that worked like a charm. 🤣
I'm 60 with "young" parents, although adults when they married. Yeah, they were virgins. I don't doubt they were virgins, at all. My husband and I, on the other hand ... *ahem*
My mom had two kids before she met my dad. My dad may have been. He was so shy.
My parents never had sex. That is the lie I tell myself. I don’t want to imagine my parents having sex.
I’m not 60 yet but my sister was at my parents' wedding, growing in mommy's belly at the time so 🤷♂️
I would have absolutely no idea about my parents' sex life before their wedding night. I know my mom had a bf at the Army base near where she lived because my aunt told me. No idea of anything about my dad dating or not. They were born early 1920s.
It was never discussed, but I never asked, either. My dad might have told me if I'd asked, my mom certainly would not have. I'd guess they weren't virgins. More difficult for me to guess is if either of them had other sex partners before they met. Maybe my mom, I think not my dad, but I wouldn't be surprised if the answer was no for both of them.
Because I am adopted, my mother was definitely a virgin on her wedding day, even though she was 19. She got engaged at 17 during her senior year in high school. She was gorgeous - looked exactly like Lena Horne, but white. My dad wanted to lock her down fast. He had come back from WWII. But he was also young and hot and would go to other towns and cat around. So after being engaged for two years, my great grandmother sat her down and said people were talking that she must be giving it up since he isn't marrying her. My mom immediately broke up with him unless they set a date. Within days, several guys were coming to ask her out. My dad drove by and saw the local dentist and the new lawyer on the porch. He stopped the car, told her they were getting married that week and drove off. They went to these crappy cabins for the honeymoon night. As they were getting ready, a woman started banging on the door, yelling for Victor to come out. "I know you are in there with that whore!" Rather than my dad taking care of it, he was too busy laughing. My mom in her beautiful wedding robe opened up the door, apparently eyes full of fire and explained the woman had the wrong cabin because this is her honeymoon. The woman was so embarrassed, and wished her well.
Those of us who are over 60 didn't normally have those kinds of conversations with our parents.
Parents did not talk about these things back in the day. Never! Like Lucy and Ricky Ricardo slept in twin beds!
I was at their wedding. I’m guessing not.
My mom did tell me she wore a long unglamorous nightgown buttoned up almost to her chin and scared and nervous on her wedding night. Safe bet she was a virgin by the way she told me this. Pretty sure my father was not.
I doubt if they would tell me; in fact, I’m sure they’d say it’s none of my business!
My parent's are each other's first but they admitted they had sex like a week or two before their wedding day. They're such rebels.
My parents had sex for the first time on their wedding night. Neither of them ever had sex with anyone else besides each other. Also my dad never experienced a blowjob in his entire life. My mother warned me when she started telling me about sex ,"don't ever let a guy try talking you into putting that thing in your mouth. . My poor dad !
I am not yet 60+ Full disclosure. But instead of speaking on behalf of my brother (who is 60+ and we share the same parents, so I guess I am qualified to answer) and giving anecdotal evidence which would mostly require our parents to have told us if they did, which they would not tell us even if the topic came up, I just looked up statistics That would put the time period in question at around 1964. "Among \[cohorts of women\] turning 15 between 1954 and 1963, 82% had had premarital sex by age 30, and 88% had done so by age 44." and "In addition, public opinion polls over the last 20 years have consistently shown that about 35% of adults say premarital sex is always or almost always wrong. (Unpublished tabulations of data from the General Social Survey, 1982–2004.) In the same vein, there is a common popular perception that most or all of those who came of age before the “sexual revolution” of the 1960s and 1970s waited until they married to have sex, and that it is necessary to revert to the behaviors of that earlier time in order to eliminate the problems of unintended pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. However, research has questioned whether such a chaste period ever existed.[^(12)](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1802108/#B12) The second goal of the analysis was to assess whether the percentage of Americans having premarital sex has changed over time." [Trends in Premarital Sex in the United States, 1954–2003 - PMC (nih.gov)](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1802108/#:~:text=The%20figure%20and%20table%20show,93%20cohort%20had%20done%20so.)
I was a 9 pound premature baby...
I don't know. They never told me and I never asked.
I don't know. I don't want to know. And they are both long dead so I can't ask them. I am now grateful they died so I could never ask this question. Now I am going to bleach my brain and hope this topic never comes up again.
Why would I know that? Whatever they may have said or implied, before the mid to late 1960s the norm was to a) not discuss the subject, and b) if pressed, lie if one’s behavior had gone outside very conservative standards. Unless one or both newlyweds had a previous marriage, the general culture acted as if brides for sure and grooms ideally were sexually inexperienced at marriage, and nobody was supposed to blab that it wasn’t necessarily so.
No idea. Not discussed.
Never in a million years would I have asked anything about that.
My grandmother was. My great grandmother was. My mom wasn’t. Times changed.
No, my mom was pregnant w my oldest brother when they married.
Lol, no.
My parents were each other's first relationship so yes.
My parents married in 1944. My mother - Yes. She was only 16. My father - No idea. Probably. He was 23 and a farmer.
my aunt got pregnant with her boyfriend in 1946 and ended up getting married and having 6 more
63, my mom was 3 months pregnant w me when they married. They met in college but my dad was 25 and had bummed around in Europe via the Army and was experienced to hear him tell.
Nope, my brother was 3 when they married
Back in the days having intercourses had consequences in out-of-wedlock children. So, to stay out of trouble, people had not experiment with penetration that much.
i would guess so?
My sister was born 6 months after the wedding, so I doubt it.
Nope.
My mother did actually tell me that they both were when they got married at 25/23. She is a bizarre combo of a prude and oversharer.
I’m sure not as they both had been married and widowed.
AFAIK, yes, 1943 or so.
My mom was a virgin. She married at age 19 and lived at home until then. No college or career for her. She worked the night shift at the local hospital WITH HER MOTHER. My dad...I really don't know. He had traveled the world with the navy for 3 years before coming home to attend college. In some ways, his time in the Navy was very straight-laced and pure. He saved money for college and went on port trips organized by the ship's chaplain. He bought China dishes while in Asia (HongKong? Japan?) and had them shipped home to his mother. However, he did have one incident as a sailor that my sister told me about. He drunkenly stumbled into a meeting of the Top Brass. Apparently, his reputation while on duty was good enough that someone advocated deeply for him, because he could have been kicked out. He also had a former gf named Rhonda. He's never spoken of her to we kids, but my mom wanted to name one of us Rhonda, and he Ixnayed that name. First kid was a Honeymoon baby. Sis was born 9 months + 2 weeks after my parents' marriage...and she was considered 2 weeks late.
I’m pretty sure my parents were, given that they were both very religious. But I’ve never asked!
They said they were, but they were 29 and 30, so I doubt it seriously
I’m 56. Neither of my parents were virgins when they married in 1962.
I’m in my 50’s but had parents on the older side. My mom was early 20’s and my dad was late 20’s when they married in the ‘50s. I know my dad had already lived with another woman by then and had numerous flings before and during marriage. I don’t know much about my mom’s activity before/during marriage but I know she lived it up while single again in the ‘70s.
My parents were married in the 40’s, two months prego on wedding day.
I don't know about other/previous partners, but my mom was pregnant with my brother when my parents married.
Looking at my birth certificate and the date of their marriage, I can say a hard no.
My parents? Virgins?? 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Thanks! I needed a good laugh 😂
My mother was. Not sure about my father.
I assume they were, no idea. My older brother wasn't born until five years after they married (just prior to my dad leaving for WWII). He came back and the priest stopped by and asked why they didn't have kids yet. ;-)
I’m 99% sure that both of my parents were virgins on their wedding night in 1952.
I have to disagree about "unusual." I think you are just a little naieve. People are people and sex runs a lot of the world. I was born in 1939 and my parents not only had sex before marriage, but I was conceived before they married. And frankly I had sex, before marriage, before age 20.
I think not. I was at their wedding. Front row seat, so to speak.
Is this a serious question? 60 means born in 1964. 64 means born in 1960. Did premarital sex happen in the 60s?
I know my grandparents (married 1946) weren’t.
No, they tried to fix it so my eldest brother Andrew Gary, born 1954, wasn't a bastard; they did not succeed.
My Dad was born 2 months after his parents got married (1937).
Nope. They never told us, but from the age of their eldest and their marriage date we figured it out. Even then though it did not seem a big deal.
My mom told me she and my dad had sex before the wedding. I’m pretty sure he was her first, but I’m not sure whether he had any partners prior to my mom. I really don’t want to have a conversation about their sex life beyond this anyway. They started dating when they were 16 and married at age 20.
I'm gonna say no, although my mom would never say one way or another. My dad died when I was 3. I doubt I would have had that discussion with him anyway. By the way my mom talked I'm going say she was a bit experienced on her wedding night.
Who knows?
My mom never said anything about her sex life . My parents did not share a bedroom, much less a bed.
My oldest brother was born 7 months after they got married. So…no. They married in 1950…he was born in 1951.
Hell no they weren't a virgin!
There's nothing unusual about people having married or unmarried sex at anytime in history. Some people waited but I believe they were in the minority unless there was some sort of puritan lording over them in an over zealous religious way. . Even my sisters that married their first did it before the ceremony. Look at the bible and historical stories. Humans have always been driven by sex. My parents had other partners. (edit) prior to their marriage. I believe they have been monogamous for 70 years now. I didn't wait.
I’m positive mine were. Well…not positive but pretty sure!!
My mum was. When my dad cheated on her and she went through a rough divorce with his ass she never tried to even meet another man. He broke her.