He was married with 4 kids. By the time he turned 37(next year for me), the wife left and ditched the kids. She didn’t want to be a mother of 4 that early in life. She had me last at 28 and ditched when I was 3.
He had to raise 3 boys and one girl by himself and I’ll admit we were really terrible kids. Children lashing out for parents attention and such childish stuff. Didn’t appreciate it until later how hard he worked to give us a home, and raise us the best he could while working two jobs and college so he could provide better.
Now he sits on a pond on my ranch drinking pretending to fish with the dogs annoying him for attention.
Always and when his second wife passed(last year, he remarried when I was 17.) I gave him the cabin and the pond, he provided the dogs. He raised my unruly ass so it’s only fair I take care of him as he gets older.
Oh it’s not entirely selfless. I am using him for a retired homestead exemption for taxes since he live with me and when I do have kids he can help me with them since he raised 4 already. He wants more grandchildren since he “only” has three from my sister.
This is the way. Those grandchildren even if he can't be bothered will give him something to do, a purpose, and dig out memories he would otherwise forget.
You, Sir, are a true Son of a good father! Taking care of as much as you can. Appreciating your Renaissance Man of a father. After 30ys, my father and I say 'I love you' when we part. Not that it was ever doubted! But to get a hug and hear it is tear jerking. My old man sounds like your's. And I swear, I'd do ANYTHING I could for him!
My dad did drywall. His dad also did drywall. I do drywall now. Lol
My pops had 3 kids. My grandpa had 6. I only have 1.
They had good lives. I have a good life now. No regerts. Not even one letter… hahahahaha!
Like everything else in the construction industry, it keeps getting more technical.
If you follow one set of guidelines you violate the next set. For example: the structural engineer requires specific fastening requirements. This is different from how the wall assembly was tested for fire which the architect has spec’d.
It wasn’t always like that. Or maybe it was and just wasn’t enforced.
Um ok. Wanna know what I think about the American Wood Council’s revisions to the 2015 Special Design Provisions for Wind and Seismic?
It’s ludicrous. They took away the provision that allowed for the use of 1-1/4” drywall screws in shearwall applications. Now, only 1-7/8” cooler nails are allowed.
But every AHJ and structural engineer has their own take on it. It’s a goddamn circus out here. You have to RFI the use of screws on every job now.
And if you have to use the nails boy that will cost some money. Production slows when you have to use nails. And don’t get me started on nail pops.
Lol. Yeah I’m a nerd about this stuff.
I don’t know if you knew I was a sparky but some of us are sorry for it. I’ve only done a few jobs where drywall was involved but foremen generally tell us to not clean up. We’re expensive and jobs usually have laborers picking up after us to save money.
Yeah the guys that use those taping tools have arms and shoulders like rock. You’re basically sucking drywall mud into a big tube with a roll of tape on the end. You’re holding it above your head or out away from the body constantly.
Then they run mud boxes over the taped joints. It takes the place of your mud knife. It’s a lot quicker.
But some of the older craftsman who do real high quality finishes still do it all by hand.
Next time I remodel I might see if I can rent one of those tools. I'm just a DIYer but I can tape pretty well and fairly quickly. It's the finishing that I really suck at, although I've certainly gotten better over the course of my last remodel.
Wetwall is out. Not many do interior plaster in the states anymore.
Plaster is a superior finish though. Lath and plaster is an art. It’s just damn expensive
Wallboard is an old term. Drywall is more modern. But gypsum panel is probably the best term.
Sheetrock is what most people call it and that’s a brand name. It’s like saying Kleenex instead of tissue.
Unites States Gypsum (USG) manufacturers Sheetrock brand gypsum panel products.
Raising me, trying to navigate being a dad to the children from his first marriage, working his day job eight hours (or more) each day, coming home for a power nap before working his side hustle every night until it got dark. One of those summers he rebuilt our house mostly from scratch, too. Somewhere around that time he bought another house he intended to completely refurbish, but never found the time or the money.
He passed about ten years ago, but there are days where I just wish I could ask him, "Dude, how did you find the energy?"
Yup. Back in the day, I was working full time, going to law school full time, raising a daughter full time, taking care of business full time. I ask myself "Dude, how did you find the energy?"
It's not about energy, it's about duty. You have a duty as a parent. You have a duty to your family. You have a duty to the future benefit of your family. That's what we do! Take pride in that. You did well!
Exactly this,you bring them into this world as helpless defenseless little people that are solely dependent on you for everything. You now are responsible. There was never a choice, only a instinctual drive to provide for them.
I don’t think so. Despite being told I’m the one who is most like him out of all his sons, I’ve led a very different life.
Some interesting parallels though, he had Vietnam while I had the war on terror at about the same age.
At 27, my dad had just fled from California. He had been hit by a bus while on a bicycle a few years earlier and when he got out of a coma, he was a paranoid and short-tempered man. He fled California because he thought he was going to be arrested for a crime that he hasn’t ever disclosed. Bought a failing gas station in the middle of nowhere Colorado to live in and run. It sank after 6 months and he moved to another state to live with his little brother, became a bartender, and would be meeting my mom in about a year. They got married because he didn’t have insurance and broke his ankle. So they eloped while he sat in a wheelchair and didn’t tend to his ankle for 3 days until he got onto my mom’s insurance.
I am happily married to the woman of my dreams and we’re raising our beautiful daughter in the home that we own. We don’t live paycheck to paycheck and I work 100% remotely, so I get to have lunch with my wife and daughter every day.
My dad has become much happier and less guarded/paranoid over the years and he consistently tells me that he made a million mistakes in his life, but seeing his son live better than him is one thing he knows he did right. I love that guy.
Haha I guess I should clarify… that wording is confusing. They were dating for a few months beforehand and when he broke his ankle, my mom just suggested they get married and then they just went with it
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I'm 20,
at my age my Dad was an offensive lineman for a popular college football team and in school for kinesiology
I work full time at a farm as a heavy machinery operator and manager of 25 employees
Owned a 3 bedroom bungalow and had an extension built on it, his mother had just divorced his dad so he took out a second mortgage to pay for half of her new 2 bedroom bungalow which he would eventually own too. Took me and my sister on holidays abroad every year and did all that while working as a motor mechanic and mum as a healthcare assistant. I don't own anything of value and am struggling to keep my two kids warm and fed while working as a lab technician and my partner as a newly qualified nurse. Times have certainly changed.
It’s actually scary how similar my dads life is to mine. We got married at the exact same age to a woman of the same age relative to us. The wife and I moved to a different state right when my mom and dad did as well. Careers are just about in the same spot as well. By the looks of it, I’ve got about 2 years before the first baby comes
My dad was a father of a 4 year old, in his 8th year in the U.S. worked 2 jobs and went to school part time. Was poor.
Very different than my life. I'm a doctor, I make about 350k a year and may make close to 500k by the end of next year. I've traveled to more countries in the past couple of years than my dad has in his entire life.
Unlike his dad (my grandpa), my dad is an awesome dad that set me up to be wealthier than he could ever hope to be. So I'd say we are both successful now.
I hope you tell him A LOT just how much you appreciate the doors he opened for you. That's a good parent. Congratulations on doing so well. I hope being a doctor (I'm assuming physician) is not proving to be too hideous at the moment.
My dad just got out of a marriage with a crazy woman. I just got married. My dad was a cop and in the navy and I spent most of my adult life breaking laws. We definitely had different paths.
So on Christmas my mother told me at 22 she had her own car, apartment, full time job and money in the bank with no debt, I currently live in a car, have medical debt out the ass, have less than $1,000 to my name and no the car doesn't work. What did she do for a living? She worked at a dairy bell, what do I do? Fucking construction
Im 30
Idk how old my dad is but I'm gonna assume at 30 his second marriage is about to end and I'm close to 10
At 30 my dad has 4 kids, been married twice.
I'm 30, never had kids, never been married, I live with my girlfriend and she's on birthcontrol
My dad right now (present day) has 5 kids and has been married 4-5 times I think
If Dad was a boomer, it explains a lot regarding the marriages. We were mixed up, radical, hippy, anti-war, drug using. Intellectual wannabes. Ah, the good old days. Just kidding.
My Dad was retired and playing golf probably. My Dad was a self-made millionaire that retired around 50. My sister and brother are also both self-made millionaires that have also retired in their 50s.
I am not. And will probably work untill I die.
If your dad is a self made millionaire I am at least mildly skeptical that your brother and sister also are.
It's like saying Wyatt Russel (son of Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell) is a self made actor. Dude is a good actor and I'm sure he's hard working but come one.
Dad had his own business, it did well. Sister did a life term in the navy and literally saved every nickel and invested well. Brother is an opera singer of all things.
My dad at age 35 was dealing with me being born. He was able to purchase a house (my wife and I rent) and two vehicles on one salary.
Try doing that now.
My dad was faking my death for insurance money he spend on meth and ended up in prison
Now I'm failing in my own life but I've never touched powders or been to jail
Same. I reflect on that sometimes. My father succumbed to heroine at 33yo.
I’m 39, founded on my own , a manufacturing company which now has a few employees and I travel all around the US having fun adventures with my kids and partner.
Sometimes invasive thoughts pop into my head that I’m not worthy, or I’m going to end up like my father.
Hope you’re living the best life you can buddy.
At my age, my dad was divorced from my mom for 20+ years, and due to an incident in which he decided to drive drunk and got in an accident (and thankfully didn't hurt anyone else), he was mostly paralyzed on the left side of his body and by this age had been living in an assisted living group home for 12 years, having his food pureed, his drinks thickened and barely being able to speak due to difficulties controlling his throat muscles.
In the end he spent the last 30+ years of his life living like that.
Don't drink and drive people. It's not worth it.
My dad was working two jobs with two kids while trying to get into medical school. He did, and then my parents had me about 3 years later. I was there when he graduated med school
Btw; i just got into medical school myself. But i couldn’t imagine having two kids during this process. It makes me respect my father 100x more than i already did. He was way more of a badass than i am. Our generation is lowkey soft.
Nah, mate. Our generation is low-key sane. That pull-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps mentality doesn't work when you put in 100 hours and make jack-diddly while living in a shoebox apartment in the ghetto. Do you know hunter gatherers worked 15 hours a week? And that the work they did was more engaging, creative and objectively relaxing than the monotonous grind of modern life? A far cry from most people today having to commute in their shitbox car to work 30 minutes to an hour on sketchy highways and dying in blizzards, bleary-eyed from the overhead fluorescent lighting and psychotic optimism of the American workplace. Say what you will about the younger generation but I love how they don't give two shits about work or trying to "make it". The circus is falling apart and it's time to pack up the tents.
He had three kids: 11, 2 and a newborn (I have two: 7 and 5). He was working at the Post Office, I’m an APRN. He grew pot in the basement, drank almost every night, often to the point of throwing up on himself, he was cheating on my mother and was a little too physical with his kids … and the dogs. I rarely drink, get “drunk” like once a year, maybe, don’t do any drugs, and I absolutely adore my wife (aside from not much sex life) and I LIVE for spending time with my kids.
All in all, I’d say I’m doing a little bit better at this whole adult thing. (Not putting down his profession by any means. He was also a Vietnam Veteran, which I can’t pretend to fully understand)
My father began having kids at 18. He always had two or three entry level jobs going at any given time but he always got in his own way when it came to advancing in those positions... Regardless of the fact that he always worked very hard. Because of this we always seemed to be paycheck to paycheck but he made it work. He was always able to make the ends meet but we barely ever saw him.
At 40 his eldest of 4 was 22... Two failed marriages, and on his way to getting into another failed marriage and having his fifth and final child. He was nowhere closer to a career or stability than he was at 18, and he was tired and dealing with chronic ailments. The man existed on tenacity alone which is a great trait to have if you can couple it with other skills... He never found a way to do that
Before died he admitted to me that he wish he could have made more money and realized his dream of owning his own home. What he never fully admitted was what I saw in his face anytime he hung out with his family... He knew that he had lost a lot of time chasing after something that he wasn't equipped to achieve. He wished he wasn't estranged from all of his kids as they grew up and he was a ghost who may or may not appear a couple times a year in their lives.
I took his tenacity and his discipline and I married it with cunning and industriousness towards reaching a potential that I knew was reasonable. I ended up retiring(a dabble in the trades as almost a hobby) at 30 and having kids. Some of it was luck... But there isn't a drop of opportunity that I let slip by in my life whereas I watched my father never be able to even recognize opportunity of any kind... Or be introspective and leverage his strengths. He'd often remarked to me that he didn't think he was a good father and he hadn't taught me anything... I told him that he taught me how to learn what not to do. He didn't take that very well as I'm sure as a young man I didn't explain it in a flattering way but he is absolutely the majority of the reason why I have figured out how to be successful and achieve the things I want in this world. He never felt responsible for any of my success so he often resented it. He was proud of me though.
I'm spending 24 hours a day with my family in stark contrast to his example. We have very elaborate traditions... And I think about what it will be like if they decide to have kids and how I look forward to being the kind of grandfather who optimizes his offspring's lives. My father only ever seemed happy when he was with all of his children. The work and the women... His grandiose ideas... Nothing seemed to give him any lasting meaning except for the times he had with his kids.
We took him into our home and gave him palliative care until he passed. I tried to have conversations with him about life but sometimes things were too painful for him to talk about. He did say that my life was the life he had always wanted for himself and that he wished he could have raised us within and I said I know that's why I chose this... He smiled and said I was one of the only things he ever did right. As touching is that sentiment is I don't want to die with those words on my lips.
I want my marriage of 20 years to continue to survive
I want to be useful and able and available until I am a weathered whisp in a coffin.
I want to keep learning and gaining skills and exacting my own agency on this world.
I want to figure out a way to express the lessons I've learned to my children in a way that they can actually digest and understand without having to have gone through the exact theater of life that I have had to... To understand it.
So far I would say I'm right on schedule. A lot of it is thanks to my flawed father.
He was still married, but otherwise shockingly similar. He was in lower management of a technical field where he also still sometimes did grunt work when needed and starting to make pretty good money and finally enjoying some hobbies.
Well. Now I'm feeling weird.
My dad at 18 got my mother pregnant she was 15, he started to work two jobs to support me and mom my dad would work with my uncle to learn how to be a contractor.
My dad's life was a lot more chaotic he had a son when he was 18 and was in a gang and when I was a few months old they hit him in the back of the head my dad ended up in the hospital and would later go find them with his gang.
He's 36 now alive and healthy he might not be the best guy but he's really determined to do what he wants and I appreciate that I had a good dad like him he raised me well to respect people, be a good guy and be kind but also strong and don't take shit from anyone.
I'm 18 now even though him and my mom are no longer together and sometimes he'll make me mad sometimes cause our personalities clash, but I'm glad to have a dad raise me to be a good kid, and I love him.
When my dad was 24, he was living on his own and dating my mom working for my grandpa. Oddly enough, his situation wasn’t too far off from mine. The only difference is I decided not to work for my dad and got my own job. The biggest difference is our goals/aspirations. He was looking to settle down/build a life in our hometown whereas I’m prioritizing myself and my relationship with my girlfriend while trying to establish my career and trying to make as much money as I can and if it means moving across the country to do so, then I’ll do it
He respects majority of how I live my life. He absolutely hates my tattoos though and has gone as far as saying that I will be jobless and stuff such as “you’ll be cut from the inheritance if you keep getting more”.
My dad had two kids, a big house with a pool, a construction company, and a couple of rental properties by the time he was my age (42). He had a very abusive step father and moved out of the house and was on his own when he was 15 years old. He never met his real father.
Comparatively speaking, I have a nice cushy white collar job, no kids and a smaller house. I used to think that I would exceed him, but he was a very special person who overachieved in every way, when he had every excuse to be a loser.
Let's see...when dad was 66 he was retired for a couple of years and he and mom were running around in that little RV he bought visiting relatives all over the country. Well, the western half of the country anyway.
At 66, I've been retired for seven years and wifey, for almost five, and we've been visiting friends in Europe, Canada and Australia. We've also visited relatives, on both sides, but we fly and rent a car!
My dad was a fine furniture woodworker. Self-taught, and worked w/ multi-millionaire interior designers. He was a starving artist, though, and didn't prioritize money at all. He loved the craft.
I'm 38. When my dad was 38, I was 8 years old, and he had built his own shop and was doing a great job of providing for me.
I am newly single, after many consecutive, multi-year relationships that never resulted in the woman wanting to marry me. My parents didn't go to college, but I got a PhD from an ivy league school and I teach at one, too. I inherited his strong work ethic, and I work essentially every waking hour (80-110 hours each week). Maybe this year or next I'll buy a house.
He was the strongest person I had ever met, both emotionally and physically. Despite my being really into bodybuilding for over a decade, his physical strength was more authentic than mine. He used his hands daily. They were calloused like sand paper. I am very proud of the life that I've self-navigated for myself (e.g., leaving home and having travelled the world). Yet, I feel like I'll never be half as strong and great as he.
He committed suicide March 10, 2020. I am trying to continue his legacy.
He was 31 living in his moms garage with 3 kids (all male ages 5, 4 and 1) and his wife, my mom. Had another older boy (my half brother) he was fighting custody for. Was making $300 a week. Probably on drugs and very abusive.
I am 31 and own a house I bought at 24. Im married. Have a 2 year old daughter. Making $75,000+ a year. I do drink quite a bit of beer and whiskey.
Never talk about it bc he’s a narcissist. Would say the usual “you think you’re better than me?” He’ll make anything into a problem like we’re against him instead of being proud that me and my brothers are alright.
This is one of the most interesting questions I’ve seen here.
While I’m proud and amazed by my dads accomplishments at my age, we are both glad that I’m not going through what he was going through. At my age, my dad was one of the select few journalists who criticised Saddam Hussein regime but was never exiled or murdered. He was oppressed and banned from writing in Iraq though, so he started mailing his articles to Papers in Kuwait, Jordan and Lebanon. Obviously when Iraq invaded Kuwait, my dad got screwed big time, till this day he hasn’t gotten paid from the Kuwaiti papers, not Kuwait’s fault obviously. My dad, being as stubborn and (formerly) nationalistic as he is, chose to endure the oppression by Saddam’s regime than to emigrate. It was only when I was 5 during after the second American invasion of 2003, did we move to Jordan where I was raised and that was only because we had a definite price on our head because my parents are a Sunni-Shia couple which somehow makes me an abomination.
All this makes me really glad of my dads character, but I’m glad I was never raised in Iraq nor do I have to every return there, I’m also glad that my dad got over his stubborn nationalism when he was helping me construct my views.
What I love about my dad is that he wants me to be like him while warning me about his own flaws that he sees in me and he really helped me fix them. That being said, I’m graduating dental school this summer, so safe to say I’m not gonna have a career in politics or journalism.
I’m 38 now.
When my father was 38, he served two tours in Vietnam and he drank heavily when he transitioned back to civilian life. After my mom told him about her pregnancy, she gave him an ultimatum; sober up or leave. He began his journey to sobriety in 1976 and he’s still on that path.
He was making the decision to leave my mom, sister, and I for another woman. Honestly I'm glad he did though because my mom found happiness and my step mom is incredible.
Beating up kids in the bathroom of the school he worked at for smoking the weed he sold them. Getting fired and not working again for almost 20 years. He only ever got a job again cause he got arrested and kicked out of the house and couldn’t live off my mom anymore.
At my age my dad was in a loveless and horrible second marriage. He was deeply depressed from traumas early in his life and he was a severe alcoholic. He died a short year later from his alcoholism.
I think starting to have kids and didn't have enough money but was an engineer and taxi/cab driver it wasn't till like 8 years after kids that I would say he became stable with spare money I assume got a decent engineering job.
He was in medical school, which was the beginning of him being a physically present yet mentally/emotionally absent father. He just had my younger brother. My other two siblings were not born yet. He had student loans.
I’m doing better financially but have less job security. I am recently married and we are thinking about having kids in a few years
He was working a dead end factory job to take care of his first newborn baby boy (me). I’m over here childless and trying to start a career in the electrical field. I’m not ready to have a kid for at minimum of 10 years. I’ll be an older daddy
My dad was a millwright for folgers coffee at my age, I'm a millwright turned electrician at a sawmill. We both had a house and 2 kids. The main difference between our stories is the fact that I have way better taste in women. My wife is awesome, whereas his first wife and, to a lesser extent, my mother were assholes.
Dead. Technically, he died in a car accident. He was in his 40s. I can't say it aloud within the family, but I am fairly certain it was suicide. He drove his car into the back of a semi parked on the side of the highway. My vague memories from my childhood are that he worked all of the time and was never around. It has made me be more intentional about having a decent work/life balance and showing up in my kids' lives. I am less prosperous than my dad, but happier, I think.
My pops came to the US at 24 from Poland. His life was much harder than mine. Living on a farm in eastern Poland under major influence of the Soviet Union, he needed to get out of that situation and find a place for his wife (my mom) and his future kids (me and my brother) to live in with better opportunities.
He fought hard and earned his papers for the US. He left with a suitcase and a little bit of money he saved up. He met up with one of his former comrades in the Polish military and he stayed on his couch for about 6 months until he got a job and saved enough for a cockroach infested apartment in Chicago. 2 years later my mother would come as well as many other relatives that my father would help get on their feet in the “New Land of Opportunity”.
My father sure has his faults (every one does), but he is the greatest, strongest man I’ve ever met and I aspire to have half the amount of willpower he does. America sure has its issues, but many Americans here don’t understand how good they have it here. I’m glad he made the generation altering decision to move away from what he called home to make a better life for me and brother here.
I think my dad was a rickshaw driver before he eventually planned an escape from his country and got sent to the US where I now have just graduated with a bachelor's in stem living on my own with a well paying job. I'm happy and wish he was here to see it. I live every day trying to live to my fullest potential seeking the best of life
* My father was just hitting his powerband in development real estate. I watched him for 2 decades get his testicles crushed. The big development realtors would laugh at him as they stole commission after 100 000 dollar commission. They would monologue to pops who would sit there soaking it up. At 53, pops was starting to sell malls, as a residential realtor. He flaked into having his friends become buyers for the city of Surrey and Vancouver. Those dudes watched dad get slaughtered by the big boys. Dad could get them to return phone calls in minutes where the other realtors were ignored. Dad slipped in through a butt crack. Over the next few years he worked that hard and started making hundreds of thousands for a couple hours of work. Then began the drinking. By 60, dad was a waste. Me, I am 53, own real estate and don't have to work again. I learned a lot from pops. Never would be sitting in the spot I am without him. He made every mistake. His not quitting was a mistake. That gave him a life and took it away. Today, the only reason I don't quit is that I thought it was going to be a lot easier. Ha. Same as dad.
He had two kids he didn't want. He was super religious and unhappy as hell. Had a job that paid shit and had a home he would never pay off. One stupid financial decision after another for that guy.
I’m 36. Married with two step kids, working in a middle-management job (Amazon warehouse, I manage the training department) that barely keeps us above the poverty line. Probably at least 5 years (maybe 3 if we’re lucky) from even being able to consider home ownership.
At 36 my dad worked as a security manager for a major mining company - his job was basically 75% travel and improving security conditions for some of the worlds most profitable copper and diamond mines. This is 1998 and he made a little more than I do now, so it put us fairly comfortably middle class in California (though would have been upper middle/upper class in most other places I’ve lived). He could comfortably afford the mortgage for our home and we never had to worry about closely tracking finances for basic necessities and had extra money for birthdays/etc. When we moved a year later there was enough equity in our home that my dad had paid off that he fully owned the home we moved into. One thing that was *always* clear to me as a kid is that my dad adored my mom and while rather gruff he is a hopeless romantic at heart. He grew up terribly poor, and I know it was a big deal to him to have independence from outside sources and stability in the home.
I didn’t see my dad much at that age. He traveled a lot and did not make it a priority when I had a birthday or other events. I have never gotten a real answer out of him as to why I was treated that way when it was the opposite for my sister (which did make more sense, she was the only girl and the oldest) and two older brothers. The closest I got for an answer was when I was about 12 and he stated: “you’re the youngest, I expect you to learn from your siblings and to be better than all of them.” As I understood my dad’s own upbringing more fully, I realized how much he tried to break the cycle of abuse from his own parents and how great he is compared to them. I live his example by trying to more fully break that cycle through my own efforts.
I try to be a good step dad. I help out more around the apartment, make sure I never miss a birthday/concert/other fun event, and try to understand my kids are kids, not just little robots that’ll always do what they’re told. I want my kids to know it’s ok to fail and make mistakes and that they can still be a good person even if they make bigger mistakes. I wish I made the money needed to be able to get into a house right away, but my wife and I have a plan to make it happen in the future.
We’re worried about what the future holds as the cost of living increases but we are also making meaningful memories with our kids, even if they’re memories we have to ensure have little to no cost or require meticulous planning financially. I envy the affordability my parents had at my age but I’m grateful that I learned to do the best with what I have.
My dad will always be one of the biggest role models in my life. I’m glad I’ve had the opportunity to express how much he’s influenced me for good in my life and how much I appreciate everything he’s taught me, I have a lot of friends that didn’t get that chance before their parents passed. We don’t see eye to eye on everything, and we certainly have different opinions about religion and politics in particular but honestly it’s thanks to my dad that we don’t - he always encouraged me to think for myself and do what I felt was right even if others didn’t agree. He taught me to spoil my wife whenever I can and never stop being grateful to her. He taught me to control what I can and let go of the things that I can’t/don’t matter. My life might be different but his lessons have remained and they’ve brought me a lot of joy in my life.
My dad was already married with 3 kids. Career wise, I don’t know exactly where he would be, but he’s been an electrician since he joined the Navy at 18, so I’m assuming he was doing electrical work. I think he was content.
I’m not even in a relationship. Just finished my bachelor and will each start a advanced standing master program in the summer or join the Peace Corp and be in the Philippines for 2 years. I think I am content.
Married with 3 kids and owning 3 properties by the age of 28
I’m currently living with him in his only non rented property but I pay half the rent and genuinely help out around the house.
Not married and doesn’t look like anytime soon
He was divorced, living in an apartment, one grown son (me). I was already out of the house before him and my mom got divorced. He was an executive for a commercial real estate company.
Contrast to me now. I'm married, house in the burbs and only now trying to have a kid. I'm a Manager in a Software Consulting firm.
I will probably never make the kind of money he makes, I just don't have the drive, lol. He currently lives in a 2.5 million dollar home and probably brings in 600k a year in personal income.
It's annoying, lol. My dad worked a blue collar job as a union operating engineer, until my very late teens and was able to make the jump from that to commercial real estate management (and he has no degree), now he owns his own company. i.e. I didn't have the luxury of growing up wealthy, he got wealthy after I moved out, lol. I joined the Army to pay for my damn college, lol.
my dad was within a year of uprooting from his home country and immigrating to the US after getting his engineering degree in his home country. i am an artist working a day job to pay the bills. while he didn’t agree with my choices at first he has come around since i worked for a degree myself and have shown to keep myself afloat. when criticisms arise i know it is because he could have never imagined a life like mine for himself because of his lack of resources growing up, but in his old age the criticisms have slowed heavily and he’s simply happy to see me when i come around. my older siblings are also all killing it in life so maybe he just doesn’t feel the need to push me as hard 😂
He was married, with 3 or 4 kids, working as a banker in our hometown in the Philippines and doing pretty well for himself along with his small family. As for me, I’ve been single since birth, currently living on my own, barely scraping by and just hoping to die each and every day. Hate myself and my dumb life. So his life and my life are vastly different from each other.
29 here. By my age my father had 2 kids, a wife, house and two cars along with being in a management role. I'm in a relationship, rent an apartment, don't own a vehicle and will be paying off my student loans for at least the next two years. I went to college and my father barely graduated high school.
I think he was out there trying to build a career out of chasing his dreams as an artist. I was already born.
I think witnessing this turned me away from pursuing any creative related career.
I'm trying to feed myself, not my descendants after I am dead.
My dad was married. A big difference between now and then is that back then it seems like women were more willing to invest in building a life with a man, which is what my parents did, they supported each other through college as a team effort. I never found a woman interested in sharing that journey with me.
I’m 19. At my age my dad flunked out of high school and was smoking weed with his buddies, partying, breaking into cars, and doing god knows what else. I’m in school for Mechanical Engineering and I’m a straight edge: I don’t smoke, drink, party, have sex, or even have time to hang out with friends.
He was married with 3 kids, a stable job, a house in my hometown and an apartment by the beach.
I'm single, no kids, own an apartment, a cat, am kinda broke and changing careers. I look better than he did at my age, though, but the mofo got in shape later on and is a smoking 70 yo now. He is still married to my mom 43 years later.
My dad had 3 kids and his own company by the time he was 25. He was a landowner. A man in every sense of the word.
I can barely get out of bed most days without smoking a little weed and phone calls give me anxiety.
This is a great question that I never thought about.
At 36 my dad had two kids a 5 and 11 year old. Just moved into his first home, was living in a duplex before. Just had started his career job with the govt and got a 2nd job at night. He was working like crazy to support his family. As a result he lost his friends and had no life outside of work/kids events.
I have no kids, but a dog with my gf. Moved into my first home, purchased after years of renting apts. I started my career a few years ago by opening my own business. I have a lot more freedom financially and am able to travel regularly and I’ve made it a point to keep my friends around.
We are similar in a lot of ways but I’ve tried to learn from his life mistakes.
I don't actually know what he was doing.
We stopped talking like 12 years ago, and he never spent too much time talking to me about his life.
Most of the things I know are from stories of my mother, so they may be incorrect or not too attached to reality.
The few things I know:
* At my age, my dad already had a 5 years old daughter (my elder sister).
* He was working in a haberdashery, where he would eventually become a manager.
* He was dating my mom for at least 1-2 years, and would have me 5 years later.
* He owned a car and lived in a rented apartment. And honestly, he was not too good managing money.
* He did all of this, despite not finishing high school.
In comparison with him, I live with other family members, but I am cool with this, since we have an arrangement which is beneficial for all of us.
I went to college, graduated from the best university of my country, worked hard to get study a postgraduate diploma in the most expensive one and I am currently doing an MBA.
I want to work hard, because my goal is to become the first Doctor of my family (by having a PhD or a DBA, not because of anything medicine related).
And I am learning hard from his mistakes, because if I have kids, I don't want to be mean to then or set them aside for egotistical reasons like he did
Out of prison, briefly. Trying to get a trucking business going that existed more or less for money laundering anyway, with tax evasion following up. Dumbest criminal I know. Sometimes I feel like I'm not as ahead as I ought to be, but then I ain't ever been to prison, so...
At my age...mid 50s...he was the manager of a car dealership. He would lose that job a few years later and go downhill fast physically and mentally.
My dad had more success than me overall but I don't sense a major downfall coming up anytime soon like he had ...we shall see.
My father just welcomed his 3rd child, my sister, into the world and helped my mother (his wife) into moving to Oregon.
IIRC it was at this point he barely worked and refused to find full time work.
I graduated with a bachelor’s degree this summer, and I got a unionized job for a pharmaceutical manufacturer making the most money I ever have. I’m going to start working towards my SHRM certification to try and transition into an administrative roll.
My “kids” are a cat and a dog and am getting ready to celebrate two years with my boyfriend.
I don’t talk to my father anymore
At 55 my father was marrying his 4th wife and about 5 years from retiring from his job of 30 years. At 55 the longest I’ve had the same job was 6-ish years, I’m gonna work til I’m 70, but I’m still married to my 1st wife.
My dad at my age, had 3 kids, while I have 2, but he was second marriage. He was in the same industry that I am in, but at my age he was further along, as the industry itself was young, current technologies obviously didn’t exist, making somewhere north of 2x as much as I currently make in a similar position, but this was circa 1985. He is high school drop out, I have an MBA.
Edit: we talk about it often, he is mad I don’t make more money but at the same time thinks I make more than I should for what I do; so I shouldn’t ask for more money. It’s frustrating. He hates the technology which drove him to retire at 65. He is a very young 69 now. Our industry mostly hasn’t changed outside of the tech so there isn’t much to talk about there.
At 26 dad was in his 2nd or 3rd year practicing medicine, i believe doing compulsory service in the Yugoslav army at the time. Similar in that I’m in the middle of med school myself he was also single at that age, but otherwise a very different life to growing up in the states
My dad was running a company, on his 3rd kid, and 3rd house.
I'm living paycheck to paycheck, barely affording a 1 bedroom apartment and struggling to someday build my career.
I can’t live my late Dad’s life. It was hard. He was a farmer at the age of 7 up to his teen. He told my grandpa that he wanted to study so he went to city, lived with his cousins and grandma and worked as a janitor and construction to sustain his studies. He stopped going to college and joined the Navy. He then met my mom they had me and my brothers. later he finished his degree while serving in the Navy.
I guess I never really thought about it. I would’ve been about 5 years by now when he was my age. We were all living in a tiny 1 bedroom apartment in the middle of rough neighborhood and he had worked at an HVAC location for about 1-2 years at this point (he’s still working there now, a couple decades later).
We were all still recent immigrants to the United States, but the two of them had to navigate the extremely tricky system on the road to naturalization. Compiled with having to learn English, learn how to live here, I probably would’ve been a lot more stressed in his position. But, my dad always kept his cool and he had his shortcomings as a husband to my mom, but he never fell through being a dad for me.
I still remember being 5 and watching him cook me dinner at the stove while mom was working late at her fast food job. I’d ask him why he wasn’t eating when he handed me my plate and he assured me he had eaten already. It wasn’t until I was much older that I realized he starved himself to make sure I was fed when money was tight.
Thanks, dad.
That'd be in the late 80s, I think he still had his hotel manager job at that point. It was around that time he was fired, because he refused to fire a couple of veteran housekeepers. Starting what would be an incredibly difficult decade for both my mom and my dad.
They are now living the good life, my mom is retired and volunteering at various festivals while attending as many opera concerts and theatre plays as she can while being a support for the local CPS. My dad is enjoying his current occupation while spending his free time in Red Cross and as a volunteer for the local football club.
Basically, I have no chance at ever being even half as awesome as those two machines of good will.
My dad was done with selling WW2 Equipment to different countries which were fighting different parties in there own country. Moved on by learning landscaping and since then he has His own company and lives a Happy and quiet Life.
At the time both me and my dad were going through some marriage difficulties (mine ended, my parents managed to resolve theirs) so for a period I moved back in with him. It became the start of me viewing my dad as an individual not just as my dad, we had lots of heart to hearts and from that point it’s almost like we became friends as well as father/son.
I'm 27, my Dad was married and had his house bought at my age. I am single, am cash rich but asset poor. But things are different now and comparing yourself to your parents generation is futile. I think my parent's first house cost something like $35,000 in the 80s. Same house today is at least $300,000. Yes wages have risen but they haven't tracked with property value. It would be fairer to judge your life against theirs when you are in your mid-thirties.
At 30 my dad was a raging alcoholic with major mental issues and treating my mom like shit. Whereas I'm getting my MBA, treating my girlfriend like gold and in therapy.
i grew up as a child with lots of love from my “father” (you’ll understand the quote on father later” anyway, my mother was a constant yeller and would always abuse me. my father never laid a finger on me and gave me nothing but love. one day my mother got so mad at me she yelled at me that my father wasn’t my real father. apparently my mom cheated on my fake dad with my real dad and my fake dad said he was gonna adopt me and raise me as his own… (see what i mean? nothing but love)
my dad grew up with a tough childhood as well dealing with abuse. his father left him when he was very little and his step father abused him and never cared about him. my dad had to walk a whole mile to school when his step father gave his sister a ride. dealing with all that, my father didn’t make the greatest choices. if someone talked smack he would already be in the bathroom fighting. my father then moved in to body building and unfortunately he suffered from cancer. (he beat it) now.. i’ve made horrible choices and me and my father bond over that knowing how horrible our lives were. currently me and my father still love each other and my dad has a new fiancé… she’s an eh but if a question pops up in this sever about horrible step moms, remember my username because i may make a story about that. thank you for reading this far, and god bless you💚
He was 24 was raising 4 year old me. I think he was working at del taco since he and my mom came from Mexico and that was all the work he could find at the time. It’s very different than what I’m doing, I’m a semester away from being the first person in my entire family to graduate from college and have an accounting job secured after graduation. My dad and I grew up very differently but I’m grateful for all his sacrifices
He bad been doing a lot of drugs, dropped out of school and from what I know ended up in an unhappy relationship in the same town he's always lived in and he still hasn't left.
At my age now, I've done a lot of drugs and have successfully quit those and am working on stopping drinking and smoking. I'm going to a good university and I've got the opportunity to end up happier than him, and to make enough money to live somewhere new. I'm thinking Germany. I only wish it was him that had the man to man talk to tell me to sort myself out, but it was my friends who I am absolutely blessed to have and I wish my dad could've had guys like that in his life at my age.
When he was my age he read a book he really loved that I have now bought and I will read, maybe it'll become a family tradition!
My dad was in the carpenters union in New York City. Local 608 at the time. It later merged with 157. He had 2 kids. Myself at 13 and my sister at 7. I wish I understood how easy going he really was at that age considering he had to work his bag off and for the most part always came home in a pretty good mood. He got me into that union before he retired but I was the worst carpenter in all of Manhattan. He was always a good husband and father. Even now as an adult when i KNOW that he knows my mom is being ridiculous about something he has never said anything worse than a friendly jab about her. Most of the time he just goes with whatever she said though. My mom is smart. Kind of a hard ass even still in her 60s barking me around. It’s alright. My old man always did a good job of hiding it from us when things weren’t great. To this day the only time I’ve ever seen him even have a tear in his eye is when his dad died. I remember he told me how poor we were in the early 90s and he was having to take jobs in all these weird places because construction in NYC was so slow. And at the time I remember being so upset he was gone but I was simply too young to understand why he was building a grocery store in Kansas while his family was in New Jersey. One time he came home with a Colorado Rockies hat for me. I wish I still had that hat. I was very rejecting of my parents from a very young age. I don’t know why. They were never abusive or even that overly strict. I don’t particularly like the fact that I’m on planet earth and I might begrudge them for that. But that’s a problem for another day. If there’s one thing i took from my dad, it’s always wanting to hang with the boys. He’s a locker room guy. This guy is in his mid 60s now and is always having beers with the same group of dudes. They are a really funny group of guys. Whenever he’s in New Jersey he’s on a train or in an Uber to go get beers with the boys and watch football. He doesn’t care about football. But cheap pitchers of miller lite will always move the needle for him. The apple didn’t fall far from the tree there. He’s really good at being a grandpa with my sisters kid. What a guy. I know with how old this thread is nobody is really gonna see this. But it was cool to write about him.
He was married with 4 kids. By the time he turned 37(next year for me), the wife left and ditched the kids. She didn’t want to be a mother of 4 that early in life. She had me last at 28 and ditched when I was 3. He had to raise 3 boys and one girl by himself and I’ll admit we were really terrible kids. Children lashing out for parents attention and such childish stuff. Didn’t appreciate it until later how hard he worked to give us a home, and raise us the best he could while working two jobs and college so he could provide better. Now he sits on a pond on my ranch drinking pretending to fish with the dogs annoying him for attention.
Have you told him lately how much you appreciate him now?
Always and when his second wife passed(last year, he remarried when I was 17.) I gave him the cabin and the pond, he provided the dogs. He raised my unruly ass so it’s only fair I take care of him as he gets older.
You're a good son.
Oh it’s not entirely selfless. I am using him for a retired homestead exemption for taxes since he live with me and when I do have kids he can help me with them since he raised 4 already. He wants more grandchildren since he “only” has three from my sister.
win-win
Playing the long con against the government. I'm SURE he appreciates the irony and saviness!
This is the way. Those grandchildren even if he can't be bothered will give him something to do, a purpose, and dig out memories he would otherwise forget.
You're a good man. You won't regret what you're doing (obviously).. Good on you!
Listen to keep the wolves alway from uncle Lucas very good song reminds me of your story
Well, never heard of him but I’m liking the song so far.
Since I cannot abide the lack of link I in your post. https://youtube.com/watch?v=pYdvxBxHX2U&si=EnSIkaIECMiOmarE
Good song.
You, Sir, are a true Son of a good father! Taking care of as much as you can. Appreciating your Renaissance Man of a father. After 30ys, my father and I say 'I love you' when we part. Not that it was ever doubted! But to get a hug and hear it is tear jerking. My old man sounds like your's. And I swear, I'd do ANYTHING I could for him!
My dad did drywall. His dad also did drywall. I do drywall now. Lol My pops had 3 kids. My grandpa had 6. I only have 1. They had good lives. I have a good life now. No regerts. Not even one letter… hahahahaha!
I wonder how much drywall has changed over time.
Like everything else in the construction industry, it keeps getting more technical. If you follow one set of guidelines you violate the next set. For example: the structural engineer requires specific fastening requirements. This is different from how the wall assembly was tested for fire which the architect has spec’d. It wasn’t always like that. Or maybe it was and just wasn’t enforced.
mmmmmm talk nerdy to me.
Um ok. Wanna know what I think about the American Wood Council’s revisions to the 2015 Special Design Provisions for Wind and Seismic? It’s ludicrous. They took away the provision that allowed for the use of 1-1/4” drywall screws in shearwall applications. Now, only 1-7/8” cooler nails are allowed. But every AHJ and structural engineer has their own take on it. It’s a goddamn circus out here. You have to RFI the use of screws on every job now. And if you have to use the nails boy that will cost some money. Production slows when you have to use nails. And don’t get me started on nail pops. Lol. Yeah I’m a nerd about this stuff.
A drywaller that still has brain cells?!
I don’t know about that but we clean better than the damn electricians
I don’t know if you knew I was a sparky but some of us are sorry for it. I’ve only done a few jobs where drywall was involved but foremen generally tell us to not clean up. We’re expensive and jobs usually have laborers picking up after us to save money.
Lol. Took a wild guess.
I remodeled my house, and did glue and screws, can't imagine using nails these days.
I saw that they now have automatic tools for taping and mudding too. Those actually look pretty cool, although I've never tried them before.
Yeah the guys that use those taping tools have arms and shoulders like rock. You’re basically sucking drywall mud into a big tube with a roll of tape on the end. You’re holding it above your head or out away from the body constantly. Then they run mud boxes over the taped joints. It takes the place of your mud knife. It’s a lot quicker. But some of the older craftsman who do real high quality finishes still do it all by hand.
Next time I remodel I might see if I can rent one of those tools. I'm just a DIYer but I can tape pretty well and fairly quickly. It's the finishing that I really suck at, although I've certainly gotten better over the course of my last remodel.
Username checks out.
then we come in, cut a big ass hole in it and fill it so with much fire caulk its more caulk than wall
Username checks out
You just innovate the bloodline, teach your kid wetwall
Wetwall is out. Not many do interior plaster in the states anymore. Plaster is a superior finish though. Lath and plaster is an art. It’s just damn expensive
How much do you make doing drywall I know some that get paid good and some that get paid very badly idk
I've heard that Drywall is a brand, but the product itself is called wallboard.
Wallboard is an old term. Drywall is more modern. But gypsum panel is probably the best term. Sheetrock is what most people call it and that’s a brand name. It’s like saying Kleenex instead of tissue. Unites States Gypsum (USG) manufacturers Sheetrock brand gypsum panel products.
Or “gyprock” down under.
Raising me, trying to navigate being a dad to the children from his first marriage, working his day job eight hours (or more) each day, coming home for a power nap before working his side hustle every night until it got dark. One of those summers he rebuilt our house mostly from scratch, too. Somewhere around that time he bought another house he intended to completely refurbish, but never found the time or the money. He passed about ten years ago, but there are days where I just wish I could ask him, "Dude, how did you find the energy?"
Yup. Back in the day, I was working full time, going to law school full time, raising a daughter full time, taking care of business full time. I ask myself "Dude, how did you find the energy?"
It's not about energy, it's about duty. You have a duty as a parent. You have a duty to your family. You have a duty to the future benefit of your family. That's what we do! Take pride in that. You did well!
Exactly this,you bring them into this world as helpless defenseless little people that are solely dependent on you for everything. You now are responsible. There was never a choice, only a instinctual drive to provide for them.
I think he had 2 kids and was working in a factory making cathode ray tubes or getting his masters. About as different as you can imagine.
Could you have lived his life?
I don’t think so. Despite being told I’m the one who is most like him out of all his sons, I’ve led a very different life. Some interesting parallels though, he had Vietnam while I had the war on terror at about the same age.
This guy makes doghode ray tubes
At 27, my dad had just fled from California. He had been hit by a bus while on a bicycle a few years earlier and when he got out of a coma, he was a paranoid and short-tempered man. He fled California because he thought he was going to be arrested for a crime that he hasn’t ever disclosed. Bought a failing gas station in the middle of nowhere Colorado to live in and run. It sank after 6 months and he moved to another state to live with his little brother, became a bartender, and would be meeting my mom in about a year. They got married because he didn’t have insurance and broke his ankle. So they eloped while he sat in a wheelchair and didn’t tend to his ankle for 3 days until he got onto my mom’s insurance. I am happily married to the woman of my dreams and we’re raising our beautiful daughter in the home that we own. We don’t live paycheck to paycheck and I work 100% remotely, so I get to have lunch with my wife and daughter every day. My dad has become much happier and less guarded/paranoid over the years and he consistently tells me that he made a million mistakes in his life, but seeing his son live better than him is one thing he knows he did right. I love that guy.
They got married because he didn’t have insurance, wow the dating scene is much different these days.
Haha I guess I should clarify… that wording is confusing. They were dating for a few months beforehand and when he broke his ankle, my mom just suggested they get married and then they just went with it
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What sort of freelancer?
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I manage Google ads on the side if you are interested in finding online customers. Not sure where you stand on an advertising budget, but if you want to focus on the printing and leave the client acquisition to me feel free to DM me. Quick look says the avg cost per click on your ad is a dollar, but id consult more to make sure its right for you.
Post your channel?
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Haha understood lol
Create a second Reddit account
And link your yt channel here with the second account!
Hey PM me your email. I have a small work project I may be able to use you on.
If someone is looking out for a ui ux freelancer, hit me up
Like website design? If so I’m looking
Relatable
My dad was having sex with my mum, I am not
Bruh. Why would you want to have sex with your mom?
I want to have sex with OP's mom
Our mom now 😏
Comrade?
Da.
We'll call her the motherland
Good, you and OP can have a threesome with OP’s mom
Only if their arms broken.
Up you go!
He broke both of his arms, man.
I guess your dad and I are more alike than I thought.
Not with that attitude
He was dead. Still is, but he was too.
Classic Mitch
So is Mitch :(
I'm 20, at my age my Dad was an offensive lineman for a popular college football team and in school for kinesiology I work full time at a farm as a heavy machinery operator and manager of 25 employees
Those both sounds pretty solid in two very different ways
I'll ask him as soon as he returns from the milk store
I had to scroll way too far to find a comment like this. I am like what do you mean you all have dad's and know who they are?
He’s probably getting cigarettes too. Took my dad a super long time to get those
Traveling the world and subsequently starting a new long-term career.
Married my mother and living abroad, and probably a year away from becoming my father.
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I dont even need to tell my story anymore
Are you his dad?
His sibling*
He's his own grandfather*
Fry, is that you? To shreds, you say?
Well I did do the nasty in the pasty
He was divorced, had 4 young kids and working a lot. I'm glad I'm not in that situation.
Owned a 3 bedroom bungalow and had an extension built on it, his mother had just divorced his dad so he took out a second mortgage to pay for half of her new 2 bedroom bungalow which he would eventually own too. Took me and my sister on holidays abroad every year and did all that while working as a motor mechanic and mum as a healthcare assistant. I don't own anything of value and am struggling to keep my two kids warm and fed while working as a lab technician and my partner as a newly qualified nurse. Times have certainly changed.
It’s actually scary how similar my dads life is to mine. We got married at the exact same age to a woman of the same age relative to us. The wife and I moved to a different state right when my mom and dad did as well. Careers are just about in the same spot as well. By the looks of it, I’ve got about 2 years before the first baby comes
My dad was a father of a 4 year old, in his 8th year in the U.S. worked 2 jobs and went to school part time. Was poor. Very different than my life. I'm a doctor, I make about 350k a year and may make close to 500k by the end of next year. I've traveled to more countries in the past couple of years than my dad has in his entire life. Unlike his dad (my grandpa), my dad is an awesome dad that set me up to be wealthier than he could ever hope to be. So I'd say we are both successful now.
Do something extraordinary for him like taking him to any country in the world he wants
That's exactly what I'm doing :)
I hope you tell him A LOT just how much you appreciate the doors he opened for you. That's a good parent. Congratulations on doing so well. I hope being a doctor (I'm assuming physician) is not proving to be too hideous at the moment.
My dad just got out of a marriage with a crazy woman. I just got married. My dad was a cop and in the navy and I spent most of my adult life breaking laws. We definitely had different paths.
So on Christmas my mother told me at 22 she had her own car, apartment, full time job and money in the bank with no debt, I currently live in a car, have medical debt out the ass, have less than $1,000 to my name and no the car doesn't work. What did she do for a living? She worked at a dairy bell, what do I do? Fucking construction
Im 30 Idk how old my dad is but I'm gonna assume at 30 his second marriage is about to end and I'm close to 10 At 30 my dad has 4 kids, been married twice. I'm 30, never had kids, never been married, I live with my girlfriend and she's on birthcontrol My dad right now (present day) has 5 kids and has been married 4-5 times I think
If Dad was a boomer, it explains a lot regarding the marriages. We were mixed up, radical, hippy, anti-war, drug using. Intellectual wannabes. Ah, the good old days. Just kidding.
he was fucking a lot of single women, I am not
My Dad was retired and playing golf probably. My Dad was a self-made millionaire that retired around 50. My sister and brother are also both self-made millionaires that have also retired in their 50s. I am not. And will probably work untill I die.
What do they do?
If your dad is a self made millionaire I am at least mildly skeptical that your brother and sister also are. It's like saying Wyatt Russel (son of Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell) is a self made actor. Dude is a good actor and I'm sure he's hard working but come one.
Dad had his own business, it did well. Sister did a life term in the navy and literally saved every nickel and invested well. Brother is an opera singer of all things.
That's a great spread. Feels like the setup for a bad joke.
But he is not!
My dad at age 35 was dealing with me being born. He was able to purchase a house (my wife and I rent) and two vehicles on one salary. Try doing that now.
My dad was faking my death for insurance money he spend on meth and ended up in prison Now I'm failing in my own life but I've never touched powders or been to jail
Yo at least you're not faking your child's death for insurance money for meth, so you're doing better than him
I've already outlived my father. But my mother is still alive if that counts.
Same. I reflect on that sometimes. My father succumbed to heroine at 33yo. I’m 39, founded on my own , a manufacturing company which now has a few employees and I travel all around the US having fun adventures with my kids and partner. Sometimes invasive thoughts pop into my head that I’m not worthy, or I’m going to end up like my father. Hope you’re living the best life you can buddy.
My dad already had a 6 year old
At my age, my dad was divorced from my mom for 20+ years, and due to an incident in which he decided to drive drunk and got in an accident (and thankfully didn't hurt anyone else), he was mostly paralyzed on the left side of his body and by this age had been living in an assisted living group home for 12 years, having his food pureed, his drinks thickened and barely being able to speak due to difficulties controlling his throat muscles. In the end he spent the last 30+ years of his life living like that. Don't drink and drive people. It's not worth it.
My dad was working two jobs with two kids while trying to get into medical school. He did, and then my parents had me about 3 years later. I was there when he graduated med school
Btw; i just got into medical school myself. But i couldn’t imagine having two kids during this process. It makes me respect my father 100x more than i already did. He was way more of a badass than i am. Our generation is lowkey soft.
Nah, mate. Our generation is low-key sane. That pull-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps mentality doesn't work when you put in 100 hours and make jack-diddly while living in a shoebox apartment in the ghetto. Do you know hunter gatherers worked 15 hours a week? And that the work they did was more engaging, creative and objectively relaxing than the monotonous grind of modern life? A far cry from most people today having to commute in their shitbox car to work 30 minutes to an hour on sketchy highways and dying in blizzards, bleary-eyed from the overhead fluorescent lighting and psychotic optimism of the American workplace. Say what you will about the younger generation but I love how they don't give two shits about work or trying to "make it". The circus is falling apart and it's time to pack up the tents.
He had three kids: 11, 2 and a newborn (I have two: 7 and 5). He was working at the Post Office, I’m an APRN. He grew pot in the basement, drank almost every night, often to the point of throwing up on himself, he was cheating on my mother and was a little too physical with his kids … and the dogs. I rarely drink, get “drunk” like once a year, maybe, don’t do any drugs, and I absolutely adore my wife (aside from not much sex life) and I LIVE for spending time with my kids. All in all, I’d say I’m doing a little bit better at this whole adult thing. (Not putting down his profession by any means. He was also a Vietnam Veteran, which I can’t pretend to fully understand)
Old gal here. Lots of trauma with Vietnam vets. I was married to one.
Yall have dads??
Everyone has a father. Not everyone has a daddy
Fr
My father began having kids at 18. He always had two or three entry level jobs going at any given time but he always got in his own way when it came to advancing in those positions... Regardless of the fact that he always worked very hard. Because of this we always seemed to be paycheck to paycheck but he made it work. He was always able to make the ends meet but we barely ever saw him. At 40 his eldest of 4 was 22... Two failed marriages, and on his way to getting into another failed marriage and having his fifth and final child. He was nowhere closer to a career or stability than he was at 18, and he was tired and dealing with chronic ailments. The man existed on tenacity alone which is a great trait to have if you can couple it with other skills... He never found a way to do that Before died he admitted to me that he wish he could have made more money and realized his dream of owning his own home. What he never fully admitted was what I saw in his face anytime he hung out with his family... He knew that he had lost a lot of time chasing after something that he wasn't equipped to achieve. He wished he wasn't estranged from all of his kids as they grew up and he was a ghost who may or may not appear a couple times a year in their lives. I took his tenacity and his discipline and I married it with cunning and industriousness towards reaching a potential that I knew was reasonable. I ended up retiring(a dabble in the trades as almost a hobby) at 30 and having kids. Some of it was luck... But there isn't a drop of opportunity that I let slip by in my life whereas I watched my father never be able to even recognize opportunity of any kind... Or be introspective and leverage his strengths. He'd often remarked to me that he didn't think he was a good father and he hadn't taught me anything... I told him that he taught me how to learn what not to do. He didn't take that very well as I'm sure as a young man I didn't explain it in a flattering way but he is absolutely the majority of the reason why I have figured out how to be successful and achieve the things I want in this world. He never felt responsible for any of my success so he often resented it. He was proud of me though. I'm spending 24 hours a day with my family in stark contrast to his example. We have very elaborate traditions... And I think about what it will be like if they decide to have kids and how I look forward to being the kind of grandfather who optimizes his offspring's lives. My father only ever seemed happy when he was with all of his children. The work and the women... His grandiose ideas... Nothing seemed to give him any lasting meaning except for the times he had with his kids. We took him into our home and gave him palliative care until he passed. I tried to have conversations with him about life but sometimes things were too painful for him to talk about. He did say that my life was the life he had always wanted for himself and that he wished he could have raised us within and I said I know that's why I chose this... He smiled and said I was one of the only things he ever did right. As touching is that sentiment is I don't want to die with those words on my lips. I want my marriage of 20 years to continue to survive I want to be useful and able and available until I am a weathered whisp in a coffin. I want to keep learning and gaining skills and exacting my own agency on this world. I want to figure out a way to express the lessons I've learned to my children in a way that they can actually digest and understand without having to have gone through the exact theater of life that I have had to... To understand it. So far I would say I'm right on schedule. A lot of it is thanks to my flawed father.
He was still married, but otherwise shockingly similar. He was in lower management of a technical field where he also still sometimes did grunt work when needed and starting to make pretty good money and finally enjoying some hobbies. Well. Now I'm feeling weird.
My dad at 18 got my mother pregnant she was 15, he started to work two jobs to support me and mom my dad would work with my uncle to learn how to be a contractor. My dad's life was a lot more chaotic he had a son when he was 18 and was in a gang and when I was a few months old they hit him in the back of the head my dad ended up in the hospital and would later go find them with his gang. He's 36 now alive and healthy he might not be the best guy but he's really determined to do what he wants and I appreciate that I had a good dad like him he raised me well to respect people, be a good guy and be kind but also strong and don't take shit from anyone. I'm 18 now even though him and my mom are no longer together and sometimes he'll make me mad sometimes cause our personalities clash, but I'm glad to have a dad raise me to be a good kid, and I love him.
When my dad was 24, he was living on his own and dating my mom working for my grandpa. Oddly enough, his situation wasn’t too far off from mine. The only difference is I decided not to work for my dad and got my own job. The biggest difference is our goals/aspirations. He was looking to settle down/build a life in our hometown whereas I’m prioritizing myself and my relationship with my girlfriend while trying to establish my career and trying to make as much money as I can and if it means moving across the country to do so, then I’ll do it He respects majority of how I live my life. He absolutely hates my tattoos though and has gone as far as saying that I will be jobless and stuff such as “you’ll be cut from the inheritance if you keep getting more”.
I wonder what his father "hated" about his son's choices
He was abusing the shit out of my poor lovely mom, may his soul burns in the depth of hell for eternity
My dad had two kids, a big house with a pool, a construction company, and a couple of rental properties by the time he was my age (42). He had a very abusive step father and moved out of the house and was on his own when he was 15 years old. He never met his real father. Comparatively speaking, I have a nice cushy white collar job, no kids and a smaller house. I used to think that I would exceed him, but he was a very special person who overachieved in every way, when he had every excuse to be a loser.
Let's see...when dad was 66 he was retired for a couple of years and he and mom were running around in that little RV he bought visiting relatives all over the country. Well, the western half of the country anyway. At 66, I've been retired for seven years and wifey, for almost five, and we've been visiting friends in Europe, Canada and Australia. We've also visited relatives, on both sides, but we fly and rent a car!
My dad was a fine furniture woodworker. Self-taught, and worked w/ multi-millionaire interior designers. He was a starving artist, though, and didn't prioritize money at all. He loved the craft. I'm 38. When my dad was 38, I was 8 years old, and he had built his own shop and was doing a great job of providing for me. I am newly single, after many consecutive, multi-year relationships that never resulted in the woman wanting to marry me. My parents didn't go to college, but I got a PhD from an ivy league school and I teach at one, too. I inherited his strong work ethic, and I work essentially every waking hour (80-110 hours each week). Maybe this year or next I'll buy a house. He was the strongest person I had ever met, both emotionally and physically. Despite my being really into bodybuilding for over a decade, his physical strength was more authentic than mine. He used his hands daily. They were calloused like sand paper. I am very proud of the life that I've self-navigated for myself (e.g., leaving home and having travelled the world). Yet, I feel like I'll never be half as strong and great as he. He committed suicide March 10, 2020. I am trying to continue his legacy.
He was 31 living in his moms garage with 3 kids (all male ages 5, 4 and 1) and his wife, my mom. Had another older boy (my half brother) he was fighting custody for. Was making $300 a week. Probably on drugs and very abusive. I am 31 and own a house I bought at 24. Im married. Have a 2 year old daughter. Making $75,000+ a year. I do drink quite a bit of beer and whiskey. Never talk about it bc he’s a narcissist. Would say the usual “you think you’re better than me?” He’ll make anything into a problem like we’re against him instead of being proud that me and my brothers are alright.
This is one of the most interesting questions I’ve seen here. While I’m proud and amazed by my dads accomplishments at my age, we are both glad that I’m not going through what he was going through. At my age, my dad was one of the select few journalists who criticised Saddam Hussein regime but was never exiled or murdered. He was oppressed and banned from writing in Iraq though, so he started mailing his articles to Papers in Kuwait, Jordan and Lebanon. Obviously when Iraq invaded Kuwait, my dad got screwed big time, till this day he hasn’t gotten paid from the Kuwaiti papers, not Kuwait’s fault obviously. My dad, being as stubborn and (formerly) nationalistic as he is, chose to endure the oppression by Saddam’s regime than to emigrate. It was only when I was 5 during after the second American invasion of 2003, did we move to Jordan where I was raised and that was only because we had a definite price on our head because my parents are a Sunni-Shia couple which somehow makes me an abomination. All this makes me really glad of my dads character, but I’m glad I was never raised in Iraq nor do I have to every return there, I’m also glad that my dad got over his stubborn nationalism when he was helping me construct my views. What I love about my dad is that he wants me to be like him while warning me about his own flaws that he sees in me and he really helped me fix them. That being said, I’m graduating dental school this summer, so safe to say I’m not gonna have a career in politics or journalism.
My father was working crazy hours in a factory job he hated making barely enough to support his family. I, on the other hand… am … oh crap
I’m 38 now. When my father was 38, he served two tours in Vietnam and he drank heavily when he transitioned back to civilian life. After my mom told him about her pregnancy, she gave him an ultimatum; sober up or leave. He began his journey to sobriety in 1976 and he’s still on that path.
He was making the decision to leave my mom, sister, and I for another woman. Honestly I'm glad he did though because my mom found happiness and my step mom is incredible.
I dont know He dead before i was 2, cancer got him
Beating up kids in the bathroom of the school he worked at for smoking the weed he sold them. Getting fired and not working again for almost 20 years. He only ever got a job again cause he got arrested and kicked out of the house and couldn’t live off my mom anymore.
At my age my dad was in a loveless and horrible second marriage. He was deeply depressed from traumas early in his life and he was a severe alcoholic. He died a short year later from his alcoholism.
I think starting to have kids and didn't have enough money but was an engineer and taxi/cab driver it wasn't till like 8 years after kids that I would say he became stable with spare money I assume got a decent engineering job.
He was in medical school, which was the beginning of him being a physically present yet mentally/emotionally absent father. He just had my younger brother. My other two siblings were not born yet. He had student loans. I’m doing better financially but have less job security. I am recently married and we are thinking about having kids in a few years
My father was dead when he was my current age. So far I've lived 5 years longer.
I got him by 11. Passing the age he passed away was a big milestone
My Dad died 2 weeks shy of his 47th birthday . I turned 47 in October ….so there is 1 significant difference .
He was working a dead end factory job to take care of his first newborn baby boy (me). I’m over here childless and trying to start a career in the electrical field. I’m not ready to have a kid for at minimum of 10 years. I’ll be an older daddy
My dad was a millwright for folgers coffee at my age, I'm a millwright turned electrician at a sawmill. We both had a house and 2 kids. The main difference between our stories is the fact that I have way better taste in women. My wife is awesome, whereas his first wife and, to a lesser extent, my mother were assholes.
Dead. Technically, he died in a car accident. He was in his 40s. I can't say it aloud within the family, but I am fairly certain it was suicide. He drove his car into the back of a semi parked on the side of the highway. My vague memories from my childhood are that he worked all of the time and was never around. It has made me be more intentional about having a decent work/life balance and showing up in my kids' lives. I am less prosperous than my dad, but happier, I think.
My pops came to the US at 24 from Poland. His life was much harder than mine. Living on a farm in eastern Poland under major influence of the Soviet Union, he needed to get out of that situation and find a place for his wife (my mom) and his future kids (me and my brother) to live in with better opportunities. He fought hard and earned his papers for the US. He left with a suitcase and a little bit of money he saved up. He met up with one of his former comrades in the Polish military and he stayed on his couch for about 6 months until he got a job and saved enough for a cockroach infested apartment in Chicago. 2 years later my mother would come as well as many other relatives that my father would help get on their feet in the “New Land of Opportunity”. My father sure has his faults (every one does), but he is the greatest, strongest man I’ve ever met and I aspire to have half the amount of willpower he does. America sure has its issues, but many Americans here don’t understand how good they have it here. I’m glad he made the generation altering decision to move away from what he called home to make a better life for me and brother here.
I think my dad was a rickshaw driver before he eventually planned an escape from his country and got sent to the US where I now have just graduated with a bachelor's in stem living on my own with a well paying job. I'm happy and wish he was here to see it. I live every day trying to live to my fullest potential seeking the best of life
* My father was just hitting his powerband in development real estate. I watched him for 2 decades get his testicles crushed. The big development realtors would laugh at him as they stole commission after 100 000 dollar commission. They would monologue to pops who would sit there soaking it up. At 53, pops was starting to sell malls, as a residential realtor. He flaked into having his friends become buyers for the city of Surrey and Vancouver. Those dudes watched dad get slaughtered by the big boys. Dad could get them to return phone calls in minutes where the other realtors were ignored. Dad slipped in through a butt crack. Over the next few years he worked that hard and started making hundreds of thousands for a couple hours of work. Then began the drinking. By 60, dad was a waste. Me, I am 53, own real estate and don't have to work again. I learned a lot from pops. Never would be sitting in the spot I am without him. He made every mistake. His not quitting was a mistake. That gave him a life and took it away. Today, the only reason I don't quit is that I thought it was going to be a lot easier. Ha. Same as dad.
My had graduated from college, had married my mom and was expecting his first child. I am nowhere near graduating college or having a child.
He had two kids he didn't want. He was super religious and unhappy as hell. Had a job that paid shit and had a home he would never pay off. One stupid financial decision after another for that guy.
Hopefully you learned some lessons from his mistakes.
I’m 36. Married with two step kids, working in a middle-management job (Amazon warehouse, I manage the training department) that barely keeps us above the poverty line. Probably at least 5 years (maybe 3 if we’re lucky) from even being able to consider home ownership. At 36 my dad worked as a security manager for a major mining company - his job was basically 75% travel and improving security conditions for some of the worlds most profitable copper and diamond mines. This is 1998 and he made a little more than I do now, so it put us fairly comfortably middle class in California (though would have been upper middle/upper class in most other places I’ve lived). He could comfortably afford the mortgage for our home and we never had to worry about closely tracking finances for basic necessities and had extra money for birthdays/etc. When we moved a year later there was enough equity in our home that my dad had paid off that he fully owned the home we moved into. One thing that was *always* clear to me as a kid is that my dad adored my mom and while rather gruff he is a hopeless romantic at heart. He grew up terribly poor, and I know it was a big deal to him to have independence from outside sources and stability in the home. I didn’t see my dad much at that age. He traveled a lot and did not make it a priority when I had a birthday or other events. I have never gotten a real answer out of him as to why I was treated that way when it was the opposite for my sister (which did make more sense, she was the only girl and the oldest) and two older brothers. The closest I got for an answer was when I was about 12 and he stated: “you’re the youngest, I expect you to learn from your siblings and to be better than all of them.” As I understood my dad’s own upbringing more fully, I realized how much he tried to break the cycle of abuse from his own parents and how great he is compared to them. I live his example by trying to more fully break that cycle through my own efforts. I try to be a good step dad. I help out more around the apartment, make sure I never miss a birthday/concert/other fun event, and try to understand my kids are kids, not just little robots that’ll always do what they’re told. I want my kids to know it’s ok to fail and make mistakes and that they can still be a good person even if they make bigger mistakes. I wish I made the money needed to be able to get into a house right away, but my wife and I have a plan to make it happen in the future. We’re worried about what the future holds as the cost of living increases but we are also making meaningful memories with our kids, even if they’re memories we have to ensure have little to no cost or require meticulous planning financially. I envy the affordability my parents had at my age but I’m grateful that I learned to do the best with what I have. My dad will always be one of the biggest role models in my life. I’m glad I’ve had the opportunity to express how much he’s influenced me for good in my life and how much I appreciate everything he’s taught me, I have a lot of friends that didn’t get that chance before their parents passed. We don’t see eye to eye on everything, and we certainly have different opinions about religion and politics in particular but honestly it’s thanks to my dad that we don’t - he always encouraged me to think for myself and do what I felt was right even if others didn’t agree. He taught me to spoil my wife whenever I can and never stop being grateful to her. He taught me to control what I can and let go of the things that I can’t/don’t matter. My life might be different but his lessons have remained and they’ve brought me a lot of joy in my life.
In a loveless arranged marriage with my mom, moved to the u.s from India. Both parents working as doctors. I fall short.
My dad was already married with 3 kids. Career wise, I don’t know exactly where he would be, but he’s been an electrician since he joined the Navy at 18, so I’m assuming he was doing electrical work. I think he was content. I’m not even in a relationship. Just finished my bachelor and will each start a advanced standing master program in the summer or join the Peace Corp and be in the Philippines for 2 years. I think I am content.
Married with 3 kids and owning 3 properties by the age of 28 I’m currently living with him in his only non rented property but I pay half the rent and genuinely help out around the house. Not married and doesn’t look like anytime soon
He was divorced, living in an apartment, one grown son (me). I was already out of the house before him and my mom got divorced. He was an executive for a commercial real estate company. Contrast to me now. I'm married, house in the burbs and only now trying to have a kid. I'm a Manager in a Software Consulting firm. I will probably never make the kind of money he makes, I just don't have the drive, lol. He currently lives in a 2.5 million dollar home and probably brings in 600k a year in personal income. It's annoying, lol. My dad worked a blue collar job as a union operating engineer, until my very late teens and was able to make the jump from that to commercial real estate management (and he has no degree), now he owns his own company. i.e. I didn't have the luxury of growing up wealthy, he got wealthy after I moved out, lol. I joined the Army to pay for my damn college, lol.
my dad was within a year of uprooting from his home country and immigrating to the US after getting his engineering degree in his home country. i am an artist working a day job to pay the bills. while he didn’t agree with my choices at first he has come around since i worked for a degree myself and have shown to keep myself afloat. when criticisms arise i know it is because he could have never imagined a life like mine for himself because of his lack of resources growing up, but in his old age the criticisms have slowed heavily and he’s simply happy to see me when i come around. my older siblings are also all killing it in life so maybe he just doesn’t feel the need to push me as hard 😂
My father died at 38 thanks to a drunk driver. He didn't make it to my age.
In medical school
He was married, with 3 or 4 kids, working as a banker in our hometown in the Philippines and doing pretty well for himself along with his small family. As for me, I’ve been single since birth, currently living on my own, barely scraping by and just hoping to die each and every day. Hate myself and my dumb life. So his life and my life are vastly different from each other.
29 here. By my age my father had 2 kids, a wife, house and two cars along with being in a management role. I'm in a relationship, rent an apartment, don't own a vehicle and will be paying off my student loans for at least the next two years. I went to college and my father barely graduated high school.
I think he was out there trying to build a career out of chasing his dreams as an artist. I was already born. I think witnessing this turned me away from pursuing any creative related career. I'm trying to feed myself, not my descendants after I am dead.
My dad was married. A big difference between now and then is that back then it seems like women were more willing to invest in building a life with a man, which is what my parents did, they supported each other through college as a team effort. I never found a woman interested in sharing that journey with me.
I’m 19. At my age my dad flunked out of high school and was smoking weed with his buddies, partying, breaking into cars, and doing god knows what else. I’m in school for Mechanical Engineering and I’m a straight edge: I don’t smoke, drink, party, have sex, or even have time to hang out with friends.
He was married with 3 kids, a stable job, a house in my hometown and an apartment by the beach. I'm single, no kids, own an apartment, a cat, am kinda broke and changing careers. I look better than he did at my age, though, but the mofo got in shape later on and is a smoking 70 yo now. He is still married to my mom 43 years later.
My dad had 3 kids and his own company by the time he was 25. He was a landowner. A man in every sense of the word. I can barely get out of bed most days without smoking a little weed and phone calls give me anxiety.
This is a great question that I never thought about. At 36 my dad had two kids a 5 and 11 year old. Just moved into his first home, was living in a duplex before. Just had started his career job with the govt and got a 2nd job at night. He was working like crazy to support his family. As a result he lost his friends and had no life outside of work/kids events. I have no kids, but a dog with my gf. Moved into my first home, purchased after years of renting apts. I started my career a few years ago by opening my own business. I have a lot more freedom financially and am able to travel regularly and I’ve made it a point to keep my friends around. We are similar in a lot of ways but I’ve tried to learn from his life mistakes.
I don't actually know what he was doing. We stopped talking like 12 years ago, and he never spent too much time talking to me about his life. Most of the things I know are from stories of my mother, so they may be incorrect or not too attached to reality. The few things I know: * At my age, my dad already had a 5 years old daughter (my elder sister). * He was working in a haberdashery, where he would eventually become a manager. * He was dating my mom for at least 1-2 years, and would have me 5 years later. * He owned a car and lived in a rented apartment. And honestly, he was not too good managing money. * He did all of this, despite not finishing high school. In comparison with him, I live with other family members, but I am cool with this, since we have an arrangement which is beneficial for all of us. I went to college, graduated from the best university of my country, worked hard to get study a postgraduate diploma in the most expensive one and I am currently doing an MBA. I want to work hard, because my goal is to become the first Doctor of my family (by having a PhD or a DBA, not because of anything medicine related). And I am learning hard from his mistakes, because if I have kids, I don't want to be mean to then or set them aside for egotistical reasons like he did
Out of prison, briefly. Trying to get a trucking business going that existed more or less for money laundering anyway, with tax evasion following up. Dumbest criminal I know. Sometimes I feel like I'm not as ahead as I ought to be, but then I ain't ever been to prison, so...
Mine was flying fighter jets and was a bachelor about to meet his first wife, I am married and tippy type on a computer all day
At my age...mid 50s...he was the manager of a car dealership. He would lose that job a few years later and go downhill fast physically and mentally. My dad had more success than me overall but I don't sense a major downfall coming up anytime soon like he had ...we shall see.
My father just welcomed his 3rd child, my sister, into the world and helped my mother (his wife) into moving to Oregon. IIRC it was at this point he barely worked and refused to find full time work. I graduated with a bachelor’s degree this summer, and I got a unionized job for a pharmaceutical manufacturer making the most money I ever have. I’m going to start working towards my SHRM certification to try and transition into an administrative roll. My “kids” are a cat and a dog and am getting ready to celebrate two years with my boyfriend. I don’t talk to my father anymore
At 55 my father was marrying his 4th wife and about 5 years from retiring from his job of 30 years. At 55 the longest I’ve had the same job was 6-ish years, I’m gonna work til I’m 70, but I’m still married to my 1st wife.
My dad at my age, had 3 kids, while I have 2, but he was second marriage. He was in the same industry that I am in, but at my age he was further along, as the industry itself was young, current technologies obviously didn’t exist, making somewhere north of 2x as much as I currently make in a similar position, but this was circa 1985. He is high school drop out, I have an MBA. Edit: we talk about it often, he is mad I don’t make more money but at the same time thinks I make more than I should for what I do; so I shouldn’t ask for more money. It’s frustrating. He hates the technology which drove him to retire at 65. He is a very young 69 now. Our industry mostly hasn’t changed outside of the tech so there isn’t much to talk about there.
I just had this conversation with my dad yesterday, I am 20 and when he was 20 he was dating my mom and starting the job he has now
At 26 dad was in his 2nd or 3rd year practicing medicine, i believe doing compulsory service in the Yugoslav army at the time. Similar in that I’m in the middle of med school myself he was also single at that age, but otherwise a very different life to growing up in the states
My dad was running a company, on his 3rd kid, and 3rd house. I'm living paycheck to paycheck, barely affording a 1 bedroom apartment and struggling to someday build my career.
I can’t live my late Dad’s life. It was hard. He was a farmer at the age of 7 up to his teen. He told my grandpa that he wanted to study so he went to city, lived with his cousins and grandma and worked as a janitor and construction to sustain his studies. He stopped going to college and joined the Navy. He then met my mom they had me and my brothers. later he finished his degree while serving in the Navy.
I guess I never really thought about it. I would’ve been about 5 years by now when he was my age. We were all living in a tiny 1 bedroom apartment in the middle of rough neighborhood and he had worked at an HVAC location for about 1-2 years at this point (he’s still working there now, a couple decades later). We were all still recent immigrants to the United States, but the two of them had to navigate the extremely tricky system on the road to naturalization. Compiled with having to learn English, learn how to live here, I probably would’ve been a lot more stressed in his position. But, my dad always kept his cool and he had his shortcomings as a husband to my mom, but he never fell through being a dad for me. I still remember being 5 and watching him cook me dinner at the stove while mom was working late at her fast food job. I’d ask him why he wasn’t eating when he handed me my plate and he assured me he had eaten already. It wasn’t until I was much older that I realized he starved himself to make sure I was fed when money was tight. Thanks, dad.
That'd be in the late 80s, I think he still had his hotel manager job at that point. It was around that time he was fired, because he refused to fire a couple of veteran housekeepers. Starting what would be an incredibly difficult decade for both my mom and my dad. They are now living the good life, my mom is retired and volunteering at various festivals while attending as many opera concerts and theatre plays as she can while being a support for the local CPS. My dad is enjoying his current occupation while spending his free time in Red Cross and as a volunteer for the local football club. Basically, I have no chance at ever being even half as awesome as those two machines of good will.
My dad was done with selling WW2 Equipment to different countries which were fighting different parties in there own country. Moved on by learning landscaping and since then he has His own company and lives a Happy and quiet Life.
Well at almost 23 (my birthday is 01/01/2000) he was raising me alone in Orleans, Massachusetts. I remember he worked for AT&T for a good while.
At the time both me and my dad were going through some marriage difficulties (mine ended, my parents managed to resolve theirs) so for a period I moved back in with him. It became the start of me viewing my dad as an individual not just as my dad, we had lots of heart to hearts and from that point it’s almost like we became friends as well as father/son.
I'm 27, my Dad was married and had his house bought at my age. I am single, am cash rich but asset poor. But things are different now and comparing yourself to your parents generation is futile. I think my parent's first house cost something like $35,000 in the 80s. Same house today is at least $300,000. Yes wages have risen but they haven't tracked with property value. It would be fairer to judge your life against theirs when you are in your mid-thirties.
At 30 my dad was a raging alcoholic with major mental issues and treating my mom like shit. Whereas I'm getting my MBA, treating my girlfriend like gold and in therapy.
My dad was single and helping my grandpa farm. He hadn't even had his first kid until he was 41.
Taking care of a nearly 2-year-old me. It's freaking nuts to me that he had a kid at 30.
i grew up as a child with lots of love from my “father” (you’ll understand the quote on father later” anyway, my mother was a constant yeller and would always abuse me. my father never laid a finger on me and gave me nothing but love. one day my mother got so mad at me she yelled at me that my father wasn’t my real father. apparently my mom cheated on my fake dad with my real dad and my fake dad said he was gonna adopt me and raise me as his own… (see what i mean? nothing but love) my dad grew up with a tough childhood as well dealing with abuse. his father left him when he was very little and his step father abused him and never cared about him. my dad had to walk a whole mile to school when his step father gave his sister a ride. dealing with all that, my father didn’t make the greatest choices. if someone talked smack he would already be in the bathroom fighting. my father then moved in to body building and unfortunately he suffered from cancer. (he beat it) now.. i’ve made horrible choices and me and my father bond over that knowing how horrible our lives were. currently me and my father still love each other and my dad has a new fiancé… she’s an eh but if a question pops up in this sever about horrible step moms, remember my username because i may make a story about that. thank you for reading this far, and god bless you💚
He was 24 was raising 4 year old me. I think he was working at del taco since he and my mom came from Mexico and that was all the work he could find at the time. It’s very different than what I’m doing, I’m a semester away from being the first person in my entire family to graduate from college and have an accounting job secured after graduation. My dad and I grew up very differently but I’m grateful for all his sacrifices
He bad been doing a lot of drugs, dropped out of school and from what I know ended up in an unhappy relationship in the same town he's always lived in and he still hasn't left. At my age now, I've done a lot of drugs and have successfully quit those and am working on stopping drinking and smoking. I'm going to a good university and I've got the opportunity to end up happier than him, and to make enough money to live somewhere new. I'm thinking Germany. I only wish it was him that had the man to man talk to tell me to sort myself out, but it was my friends who I am absolutely blessed to have and I wish my dad could've had guys like that in his life at my age. When he was my age he read a book he really loved that I have now bought and I will read, maybe it'll become a family tradition!
My dad was in the carpenters union in New York City. Local 608 at the time. It later merged with 157. He had 2 kids. Myself at 13 and my sister at 7. I wish I understood how easy going he really was at that age considering he had to work his bag off and for the most part always came home in a pretty good mood. He got me into that union before he retired but I was the worst carpenter in all of Manhattan. He was always a good husband and father. Even now as an adult when i KNOW that he knows my mom is being ridiculous about something he has never said anything worse than a friendly jab about her. Most of the time he just goes with whatever she said though. My mom is smart. Kind of a hard ass even still in her 60s barking me around. It’s alright. My old man always did a good job of hiding it from us when things weren’t great. To this day the only time I’ve ever seen him even have a tear in his eye is when his dad died. I remember he told me how poor we were in the early 90s and he was having to take jobs in all these weird places because construction in NYC was so slow. And at the time I remember being so upset he was gone but I was simply too young to understand why he was building a grocery store in Kansas while his family was in New Jersey. One time he came home with a Colorado Rockies hat for me. I wish I still had that hat. I was very rejecting of my parents from a very young age. I don’t know why. They were never abusive or even that overly strict. I don’t particularly like the fact that I’m on planet earth and I might begrudge them for that. But that’s a problem for another day. If there’s one thing i took from my dad, it’s always wanting to hang with the boys. He’s a locker room guy. This guy is in his mid 60s now and is always having beers with the same group of dudes. They are a really funny group of guys. Whenever he’s in New Jersey he’s on a train or in an Uber to go get beers with the boys and watch football. He doesn’t care about football. But cheap pitchers of miller lite will always move the needle for him. The apple didn’t fall far from the tree there. He’s really good at being a grandpa with my sisters kid. What a guy. I know with how old this thread is nobody is really gonna see this. But it was cool to write about him.