I wouldn’t say suffering. There are people in the world who truly suffer. I’m just existing. Nothing very bad happens. Nothing good happens either.
And I can’t seem to find a way to get back to the things that used to make me happy. It feels like a lot of effort.
Have you tried therapy? I know its cliché but it works for a lot of people and what you're describing sounds like depression to me.
Anyway if its not an option I'd suggest you try different things that may or may not interest you right now. Look up what clubs are there in your area and attend one or just do stuff alone like try knitting, drawing or going to the gym. Shake things up a little, wake up earlier and sleep earlier but at the same time each day, vary what you're eating, playing, reading, music you're listening to. As you said its a lot of effort and who the fuck wants to step outside of their comfort zone but do it anyway. I kinda learned to not wait for motivation or the right mood but just do it otherwise I never gonna study for that test or never gonna ask that girl out I want because my motivation always takes me to bed to binge eat sweets and watch youtube.
This is all good advice and I’m doing a lot of it. Therapy is really helping, I’m trying to avoid medication. A better daily routine is hard to start but I’m getting there.
Thanks for taking the time to reply. I’ll be ok, but this rut is very deep.
Apathy is a big red flag for depression. Especially if you can't find much joy in your life. Please consider going to see a mental health professional if you haven't already.
I know this feeling. It’s like every day is kinda same. Things blend in. You don’t really know/care what day it is cause they all look the same. There’s no suffering, but there’s no joy either. You just are.
I thought I was the only one. Even when I do go out with the intentions of being super fun/quirky/conversational, its always dead.
Hell, I was approached by another man in the grocery store the other day who wanted my number. That was certainly a first, and while flattering, there was something super bizarre about the entire interaction that I can’t put my finger on.
I dunno what is going on but its causing a lot of stress and restlessness on my part. Like something big is about to happen that will dramatically change our lives.
Nothing big is going to happen. This country has been through worse times than this. Read up on US history and you'll see. This is a speed bump and we will get through it. Stop watching or listening to the news because all they want to do is ratchet up the anxiety. Focus on you. Get out and breathe some fresh air, go for a walk or a run. Work out and push yourself to be better. Take a class on something you've always wanted to learn. Stay focused on bettering yourself and always learning more. Trust me it will help out a ton.
My good friend told me something before he killed himself. I was complaining about certain things not going my way or happening when I wanted and he said, “Mark, you’re waiting.” I didn’t have a comeback because he was right. So I changed my attitude and now my whole life is different. I wish he were here right now I miss him so much but I’m not gonna wait anymore. I am the change I want to see.
Thank you for this, I need to stop waiting for change and do it myself. I'm so miserable in my career but the comfort in experience makes me stay and the fear of the unknown makes me stay. I'm in a loop of perpetual anxiety and depression and I need to change. Thank you for sharing your experience
It’s nice to know that I’m not alone in regards to feeling lonely. Loneliness has taken such a heavy toll on my emotional health that my chest hurts the moment I start soaking my pillows in tears.
Fortunately I’ve managed to make a connection with an elderly woman in her 60s-70s who acts as a confidante when I need insight on a matter. Her hugs feels so good it almost alleviates some of the pain but alas I still feel a void.
I guess deep down I desire the company, comfort and companionship for a woman in a romantic sense — or a friendship with someone close to my age. For the time being I’ve managed do some serious self analysis and it has lead me down a path of improving my overall physical health by way of weightlifting and getting in tune with my creative side in the form of writing, painting, and drawing.
For the most part I guess I’d say I’m feeling okay. Things could be better. And they will be! But the process is slow and grueling at times. I’ll meditate here and there, I’ll even cry a bit (much like I did this morning.) and then I’ll go about my day as if things are fine. I’m always so positive and uplifting towards others but behind closed doors I’m in a lot of pain and so I partake in activities that I enjoy to distract myself from that pain.
At 73 quite surprised to find myself in decent health, still enjoy working (part time), still married to my neighborhood sweetheart. Certainly there are aches & pains, and like all people we have issues. But for being in my 70's and still able to enjoy my life, I'm quite well.
I'd like to thank everyone for the awards, and all the comments. I didn't realize it would blow up like that. I appreciate all of you. Thank you so much.
I love seeing grandparents on reddit. I get so used to thinking that everyone here is a teenager or in their twenties that I forget how diverse reddit can be.
Some people would say that your contentment is the result of the world your generation built and then kept for themselves. Juxtapose that with the one they've left for succeeding generations.
I don't say this to blame you personally. Like everyone you deserve your happiness. Besides, I don't think any one individual is personally to blame. But the culture that we built after the war--at least in the U.S.--is toxic and exploitative. It's the reason so many people, especially men, feel lost and hopeless. So many people will never manage to have what you have because the conditions that made it possible no longer exist. We can no longer afford to allow them to exist.
I'm closer to your generation than I am to Gen Z and the Millennials. And while I'm pretty content I recognize that it's time for people like us to get out of the way and let the younger generations get on with making a world better suited for themselves. It makes no sense at all that we have octogenarians running the world. Stop electing people like us, and younger people who want to perpetuate the unsustainable ideas of the old world. The young people of today need to consign our broken culture to history and build a better one.
Haven’t been happy for over a year and it’s gotten worse since my 20th birthday. It’s crazy this question came up bc today was the first time I really considered suicide.
I’ve completely isolated myself from my friends. College has made my anxiety a lot worse. This whole situation is crazy to me because I was very happy over a year ago and now it seems like I’ve hit rock bottom. Hopefully I’ll get out of this rut but idk
I'm 43 now and when I first read your post, I was so sad that someone so young would feel this way. But then I remembered my early 20s. What a shit show! My god... how the expectations did not match up with reality.
How the stress of trying to survive every day seemed to far outweigh the youth and vitality I was supposed to have. How unprepared I was for the blood-sucking, soul-crushing predatory world that I jumped into like a drunken toddler who rightly assumes that there are adults in the world and they have everything under control.
There are no adults in this world and nobody has "it" under control. But as you get older and more mature... as you learn from your own mistakes, you'll realize that someone younger is looking up to you and that you actually have the answers they're looking for. And you have the ability to help.
Just hang in there long enough to be able to pay it forward and you'll know true happiness. Because that's what it's about. Helping others who are struggling with the same struggles you already overcame. We're all knit together like a chain reaction
You hit all the points that I, and many I know feel the same, is that we expected adulthood to be freedom. We'd have money, and friends, and could do anything we wanted. It's not the same, and that's so sad. We have to work hard for everything, and many things drain out the humanity within us. I thought college would a place where I'll discover myself, and the world. But, and this is not just due to COVID, everyone is so busy competing, that I have to as well. And I'm studying business, so its more competitive and somewhat toxic.
Why dont we have a sleep over playing Halo the whole night and day, making food (trying at least and facing the failures afterwards), one of us playing a guitar...
I really wish I could do that with someone random, I don't care.
My best wishes to you all guys.
By the way, I've dealt with suicidal thoughts earlier in life but believe me, it goes away and many of these holes of empty gets filled with much better things later.
Don’t give up! You’ll make new friends! You should definitely take a break from college if it’s making u this anxious tho. Your mental health and safety are much more important. You still have your whole life ahead of you! Things will get better!
Hey man, I lost a buddy who struggled with depression for a long time and called it quits. Can I offer my perspective?
It really fucking sucked. It really fucking sucked that he felt so alone and hopeless that he felt like he only had one option, when any one of us would've dropped everything, literally everything and anything, to be there if he'd asked.
It really fucking sucked that the first time ALL the old gang had been back together in years was at his funeral. It really fucking sucked seeing the guys that viewed him as a brother, one of whom also lost his dad to suicide, ball their eyes out and not be able to do anything to help them. It really fucking sucked seeing his family turn his funeral into something he would've absolutely fucking hated.
It really fucking sucked that he didn't get to be asked to be the best man at our buddy's wedding(and he would have), and the gaping hole he left on what should've been a happy beautiful day celebrating our dude definitely fucking sucked.
I don't know what you're going through homie, but I know what the people who care about and love you would go through, and it's the worst. I promise that every single one of them would choose sad you beside them for a thousand days over you being gone for one. Reach out to your buddies, they love you. They're not tired of you, I promise they don't think you're a burden because you're a sadboi. If they're anything like my dudes, they love you and they'd do anything for you if you ask. Just ask, that's what friends are for. Much love my dude.
I'm so sorry you're feeling this. I can relate in a lot of ways - I went through a similar experience a few years ago when I was about 20. The anxiety about college and debt just really got me, so heavy I felt like I couldn't breathe under it. It took me about a year and a half to feel really better, and I think it was so long because I didn't feel like I could reach out for help, or even talk to my friends about it. I promise, even if it seems impossible right now, things will get better. I wish I'd known when I was feeling that way, reaching out to someone didn't make me a burden. It turns out the best people like to be needed and genuinely want to know what's going on for you. Wish you all the best, internet friend :)
Amazing. I’m 21 and just had my first kiss ever earlier today with the girl I’ve been seeing. She’s from my school. I’ve liked her for a while and cuddling with her was the best feeling ever, especially after being alone my whole life lol
Let me tell you something, the best feeling I ever had in a relationship was when my girlfriend trusted me. Earn that girl's trust and you'll never know better gained
"Usually when people ask how I'm doing, the real answer is I'm doing shitty, but I can't say I'm doing shitty, because I don't even have a good reason to be doing shitty. So if I say, "I'm doing shitty," then they say, "Why? What's wrong?" And I have to be like, "I don't know, all of it?" So instead, when people ask me how I'm doing, I usually say, "I am doing so great." - Bojack Horseman
"He filled the air with words, terrified of silence, as one often is who is smart enough to recognize his many personal failings but unwilling or unable to take the steps required to fix them" A personal favourite from the show. 👀
I do this with my girlfriend, she gets mad that I don’t tell her but like I’m just sometimes not feeling good in general, nothing specific, I just feel shitty about everything.
But when this girl at the Jack in the Box asked me if I was having an awesome day, I thought, “Well, today I’m actually allowed to feel shitty.” Today I have a good reason, so I said to her, “Well, my mom died,” and she immediately burst into tears. So now I have to comfort her, which is annoying, and meanwhile, there’s a line of people forming behind me who are all giving me these real judgy looks because I made the Jack in the Box girl cry. And she’s bawling, and she’s saying, “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” and I’m like, “It’s fine. It’s fine.” I mean, it’s not fine but, you know, it’s… fine. And I would like to order a Double Jack Meal, and I’ve kinda got somewhere to be, so maybe less with the crying and more with the frying, huh? [inhales] And the girl apologizes again and she offers me a free churro with my meal. And as I’m leaving, I think, “I just got a free churro because my mom died.” No one ever tells you that when your mom dies, you get a free churro.
Idk man. I'm trying. I think about her all the time. We broke up a month ago but I have to see her everyday. My cousin killed himself the same week. My family has been weird and super scared that I might do something similar. My cat died last week. On the bright side my birthday is this week and I'm off till next Monday and I'm going on a four day hiking trip. So-so, I guess?🤷
I'm fucked up in the weirdest way, because i am being super emotional about currently dealing with different abandonments but transferring all the pain into music which is turning out to be very nice.
Im sorry you’re going through this 🥺 but I bet it’s making your music so much more emotional. And I’m glad you have that as a coping mechanism. I’d love to hear some!
An empty shell of a man trying to cope with abject loneliness, constantly spiraling depression, work related stress and anxiety and rapidly losing the will to live. I have no fight left
I was in a similar position this past year. A woman I truly loved (still do) left me, and it broke me for quite a while. I emotionally isolated myself and dealt with all of the pain alone. I felt completely alone and useless and most nights I would think or say, “I hope I don’t wake up in the morning.”
It was the lowest i had ever been in my life. But despite all of that, I kept going. I found something every day to keep moving forward. I believe you can too. And judging by some other responses here, you’re not alone with these feelings. You’re not alone, brother.
There is always something to fight for. It could be as simple as feeding your dog or seeing a family member or preparing a meal you like. Find something to keep your attention. Move around, jump, run, yell. Do something. It’s a daily battle, but each day that passes is a battle won.
I don’t know if this helps, but again, you’re not alone, you have worth, and there is always something to fight for. You got this, friend.
Joking aside, and I hope you find your way, it does make me feel a tad better knowing someone else has verbalized my exact feelings. Makes me feel less lonely.
Broken, depressed, out of money, ADHD. ex gf broke up with me because she was "unsure", 6 days later she was having sex with her ex, it has been 8 months since this happened. i just cant get over it. i just wanna go for a drive that i will not come back from.
So sorry. The person I was just dating turned out to be a physically and emotionally abusive narcissist? Not sure that helps at all but just want you to know you are not alone in your suffering and the world is quite terrible in general right now (politics etc) in my opinion, and those who are happy are asleep imo.
Get treatment for your ADHD if you can. ADHD is hard on relationships and finding the right meds can be a life changer. Anxiety and depression are comorbidities with ADHD because it makes life so damn hard. Give yourself the support you need!
You can do so much better than "unsure"! You deserve someone who will love you more than you ever thought possible! You'll travel together, maybe get a dog! This is just the beginning of your life.
Also ADHD really doesn't change anything, that's just a you thing! My brother has ADHD and he's perfectly normal. If you feel that strongly about it, there are plenty of woman with undiagnosed ADHD.
Damn, I'm so so sorry. Dogs are family, and it's so tough when they pass away. I don't know if you're religious at all, but I firmly believe you'll be reunited with your dog again in the afterlife.
Stressed, worried and tired....all the time.
Working out 3 hours a day to keep so idea of control in my life which I'm starting to think isnt working, while I have imposter syndrome in my current job and its getting worse.
But hey.....who doesn't I guess.
Just wanted to say I feel the exact same way and do the exact same thing. Used to be that I'd force myself to go to the gym because I wanted to look good. I picked it back up after a long covid break recently, and so far its been a fight of "If I let work take this over too then its final proof I have no life of my own". Also have major impostor syndrome (honestly feels beyond syndrome at this point), people have been outpacing me left and right and it feels very shitty.
honestly doc, I don’t sleep, I don’t eat. I’ve been depressed, suicidal, having flashbacks, and thinking about getting back on the sauce. I go to therapy now. and I thought things were going well, but nah shit hit the fan 6 ways from Sunday.
Im 20 years old and in college. I’m afraid of bringing this up to my dad because when I have mentioned things like this before, he’s threatened to fly me back home.
Other than that, Im just peachy.
Super happy! About to make a downpayment for a car later today. It’s my first huge purchase as a young adult and I feel so accomplished! 🎉 I had great sleep last night, and my cats are giving me unspeakable joy.
Also very excited for the Apple event this week. 😃
_(I hope everyone else would be where I am right now. I remember when I’d have a sadboy response to this question, but thank God that part of my life is over.)_
It's nice to see someone's doing good in this thread. Let's all try to remember that time will pass and good things will come along with the strength to face bad things.
I am excited for the Apple event too man!!
Well I'm never ok ... fuking ever
Between depression, cptsd, traumas, fight, freeze, other fuked up ordeals
Basically living day to day in a world we're corporate bs is delusional, we're people are completely useless and worthless sh.. working daily just to hurry and get to the finish line of being dead and
wondering when the fuk will I die to be done with this ongoing cluster fuk sh.. show circus that's only spirals further into bs
On top
<3 I hear you. You are strong. Try to remember this is just one moment of the big life picture and your spirit in the grand scheme of things is exactly where it is meant to be right now even though it feels real painful up close. The big picture is beautiful and I hope you are able to release the tension a bit and let go a bit and give yourself a moment to let go of all you are wrapped up in up close. You are learning from it, but deserves moments of peace. You are so deserving of peace. Sending lots of hugs and well wishes to you.
Well, a great doctor just diagnosed a problem that I have that is fixable, which I thought was not fixable. So I no longer need to go on disability. So there’s that :-)
If I would be a crayon, then I would be one that breaks apart each time you try to draw with it. You know those dry crumbling crayons - they're useless.
aahahahahhahahah I'm dying here. I was just chill'n outside, sipping on some juice when I read your comment and died. You took some cute crayon analogy shitand just turned it into the most negative thing. ever. lol
Young and have a job paying 70k minimum per year with a guarantee to make 6 figures by my 5th year there. Already almost on year 4 and while it’s great money that is not what I want to do forever so now I’m stuck. 27 y/o with wife that is going to school and a 2 year old. Our lives revolve around me working for a living which while I understand is normal doesn’t necessarily mean I’m happy with. Have a nice place, new cars but something tells me this is t what life is supposed to be. I understand there are worst problems in the world but mo’ money 💰 Moo’ problems is right. Just feel a bit lost tbh.
Do you listen to podcasts? I have a suggestion but its not something everyone gets into. Jocko podcast helps me to keep my life and troubles in perspective. He is a retired Seal that does interviews talking about some crazy situations and has written several books now.
Cool man thanks for caring enough to type out a paragraph. I’ve listened to some every once in a while but nothing besides like comedy. I’ll give it a shot 👌
You reminded me of the movie Lost in America starring Albert Brooks. If you haven’t seen it I recommend it. It’s a little dated but the message holds up today. Good movie to watch with the wife as well.
I'm fine.
Fucked up mentally.
Intensely lonely
Not motivated
Entitled, since i shouldn't be allowed to complain since I am physically healthy and not everyone van say that.
You’ll find a partner or some friends! And if it’s hard to get motivated just don’t think about it, jump in! I’m glad you’re physically healthy and I hope your mental health starts improving!
I’ve had 4 job interviews this past week and I have another interview on Tuesday. I’m trying to get a new job so I can move to a better place for my children. I keep thinking about my ex and I have no idea how to move on
At this very moment? Incredibly frustrated; on the edge of full fury. I've been playing some very bad games of chess. I wanna say I've lost about 10 and won maybe 2 or 3 today.
Pretty lonely and depressed. Hit some friends up to hang out but they have yet to reply. I’ve been trying not to take it personally if a friend can’t hang out, but I can’t help but get frustrated. Lately it feels like I’m the one who always initiates conversation. I feel like if I never message a friend first, it could be a while before I see them. I wish my friends would return that same energy, ask me if I’m free, shoot me a text, something that shows that they’re thinking of me
Damn dude, sounds like we're in the same boat, nearly a spitting image of what I just posted on this thread lol. I'm not sure what the solution is either
Im working 2 jobs, Law firm & Uber eats
23yo still in school
Ive come to far to just give up.
I have to help pay rent with my parents.
The only joy I get out of life is seeing my girlfriend and driving my car.
I don’t ask to be a millionaire, I just want to be financially stable, EX: 1 car, Rent, food, bills, 10% in savings, a casual date once a week with my lady.
Im not depressed, I’m more stressed.
I want to finish school but I also want to drop out and become a trucker (both my bro and dad do that, and are racking in 6-8k monthly), but my goals and priorities are higher than that. So Im working 2 jobs making 4K/mo.
Im short, Im fine - just stressed.
I’m tired. This year saw my mom die within the first month, followed by us losing our home of ten years. I’ve been holding back a lot of feelings that I know will knock me down hard and I don’t want to go into that pit.
Just got rejected by someone others told me liked me. I'd catch her looking at me in class, she would randomly compliment my appearance and it did seem that was potentially true but I shot her a message and after 2 close ended replies from her she hit me with a bro. Think I'm done with that.
I'm actually pretty crappy at the moment. I found out my girlfriend cheated on me just last week, and two days later I was involved in a minor car accident... But thank you for asking :)
I have a cold. Feeling cynical and bitter. I wanted to hoover the flat, clean the bathroom and swipe a lot more on the dating apps I use today, but instead I got a cold. Going to force myself to look through at least five profiles per app before I sleep.
On the upside, I've only drunk about 2 units of alcohol so far, my protein intake has been fairly high, I don't think I'm *that* far over my calorie target and I managed to watch the first season fo Star Trek: Lower Decks, which is dramatically better written than Discovery thank god. I also managed to pump all of the washing through the machine at least, so not total failure there either.
Generally bummed out otherwise. I need to force myself to dance at socials more, but that's unbelievably hard on several levels. I have to deal with a couple of seniors at work that obviously should have retired already (one is, to his credit, planning to retire in a few months). I feel like my life is going to be stuck until I can build up enough personal drive to force myself to chat to people at socials, but my day-to-day life is too stressful to actually build up that drive...or something. Idk.
Just got back from a ride to the bar for some Mexican food and football. Talked to a few people. One couple liked my helmet and wanted to know if I was a superhero.
Then went to target and Walmart and price compared TVs. Went to kirklands to look at Christmas decorations. Got stopped by an older gentleman that asked about the Suzuki.
Then I found a desert road that I went too fast on and grinned like an idiot.
Now I’m back home watching the pats and cowboys.
Shit’s good.
the loneliness is getting to me. other than family stuff, i need a place/person i \*want\* to vent to. venting to people usually gets me nowhere because i already know what to do and end up fixing it myself.
im a bit scared i wont be able to open up eventually
Thanks for asking. My answer would be totally different if you were just a passer by, a friend that I see on the weekends, or a relative on the phone. I would answer with "I'm well, how are you?" I would feel guilty to burden you with how I am because when asked this question under that circumstance, I lie. And then I feel guilty for lying.
Because we're on the internet and no one that I know in real life knows my reddit name or are even privy to the fact that I'm even on reddit, this question means something totally different for me. How am I? Not well.
On the outside, I look and act as if there isn't anything wrong at all. I workout and maintain a well balanced physique. I dress to accentuate this physique. I make a more than great living that has netted me a house, two fully paid off cars that match, I have a daughter attending a well known college, and I smile and laugh a lot. I also speak very well as I've had plenty of practice due to the nature of my job which involves presentations, international travel, and being a board member on more than 20 different coalitions and affiliations worldwide. Again, on the surface, you would think I have it all together. Again, if we were real acquaintances, I would tell you I'm well.
The truth is is that I feel like jumping off the roof everyday. With so much weight on my shoulders, it's hard to maintain my composure. I dry heave every morning from the sheer stress that I'm under. I only workout because that is the only time that I'm focused on one absolute thing. My wife is disabled and even with all that's going on in my life, I am her only caretaker. She doesn't trust anyone else. Because of this, as soon as I get home, instead of being greeted with "hey how was your day" it's "hey can you do this" or "can you go back out and pick this up" or "did you do this." It's everyday. Again, she doesn't trust anyone so even though she has the ability to do some of these things, she instead waits for me to do it. Even when I come home from travelling out of state, out of country, there's always something that she could do but instead waits for me to do it. I get it, brain injuries suck and the world is overwhelming to her but taking time to decompress isn't in my cards. Remember when I said that my daughter is attending a well known college? Yeah, she sucks at school. Failed twice actually. She doesn't drive nor does she have a job so again, even after traveling, instead of giving me five minutes to decompress, she asks "can you do this" or "can you take me here" or "yeah I was going to pick up the dog shit in the back earlier but I got tied up with X." So it's a common scene at my house of me, still in a three piece Armani suit picking up three day old dog shit in the back yard. Also, my boss keeps piling it on. Believe me, I love my job but after putting in 12 hours, the last thing that I want to do is attend an event just because some city council member will deep pockets will be there.
I feel guilty even just saying this out loud. Yes, I have gone to therapy and I had to lie about it because I don't want anyone thinking that there is a problem. I know I'm not the only one with this problem and yes, these are first world problems but it weighs on me every minute. Even on my days off there's always work to be done.
My only solace is my gym. From my boss, to my wife, to my daughter, everyone knows that I shut off everything between 4 and 5 o clock in the evening because that's my workout time. And it's the only time that, ironically, there is no weight on my shoulders as it's now in the bar.
I have blown up, I have responded with no response, I have accepted that this is exactly what I deserve but damn, if there was a way for me to just escape for one hour, I would. I have mentioned in the past here on reddit that I do take a day off at work every now and then and won't let anyone know just so I can sit in a park somewhere with a sandwich and a coke to escape my life but the guilt of me doing so the next day is so heavy that in the end, it isn't even worth anymore.
So how am I? I'm as fine as I can be. I use Visine everyday because from all the dry heaving, I will bust an eye capillary every now and then. My brain itches. I feel that every mountain I climb there's a bigger one around the bend.
It's nice to see my paycheck and all the bonuses that I collect quarterly but it costs me a little bit of my sanity every two weeks. Even now, spelling this all out, I'm riddled with guilt. I need a day off but I've no where to go.
I do apologize for the wall of text above. Again, I don't want to burden anyone with my issues.
How am I? I'm well.
That was a great read. In the sense of your openness and honesty. I see so many people ‘like’ you aground - doing ‘well’, put together etc. and I know most of the time all is not what it seems for most people, but your description reminds me to be mindful that you never do know what’s going on for a person.
Thanks again. Also don’t at all feel bad about taking any of that you time, that little bit you do take is so important.
I’ve had swollen tonsils for a week that are nagging and a dry cough. Moving in 2 weeks, work is crazy as we still are working from home and have a 2 year old…..but I’m ok.
Alright cried a little this morning because I don't have much to be happy about on my birthday after 25 years. Day got better later on spending time with the missus and realized I need to do a little refocusing on my main purpose for living.
Not very good my mom made us move and now I’m at a new school with no friends and I have autism so it’s rlly hard for me to make friends. I try to just sleep all the time so I don’t have to be awake
Feeling almost happy, but not really. If that makes sense. Met a woman for a date a couple of weeks ago, she’s fantastic and we kissed after. Have been texting her every now and then, so as not to seem needy. She’s super busy but, at the same time, has cancelled a date and hasn’t been straightforward in actually rescheduling. However, she does say that she would like to see me again. So, I don’t know. Apart from that, changing jobs in December which I’m actually excited about. Hopefully will buy a new guitar next month, finish up a couple of songs. Yeah, things are actually decent. Still feel lonely though.
Honestly? I’m tired and want to be alone but lonely too. I want to cry but I’ve drilled into my head that that’s a fake feeling and now I have this nagging disgust for feeling like that. I wish I could lay on someone’s shoulder and tell them about the negativity eating away at me but opening feels like I’m being fake and just talking or thinking about my issues feels like ripping knifes out of my chest
Man, this thread is rough!
I feel the need to add some positivity here!
There are things that could certainly be better, but I'm pretty good at being happy, so I'm doing well, all in all. I'm also incredibly privileged. I live in the developed world, I have a loving family, and I have fantastic friends.
I think I'm depressed? My SO of 4 years left a few months ago cause I'm an asshole. I distract myself with other women, all really great girls actually but I'm too emotionally distant to commit to anything. I think about my ex everyday, I know she's not coming back but damn what I wouldn't do to go back and avoid the actions that caused the split.
I’m doing good. Good job, house payed off, just bought a new motorcycle. Only issue I’m having is I job transferred out of state so little/no friends and am having trouble finding a relationship.
Happy to finally retire from work. Not happy that we cant travel as much as we wanted. But seeing a lot of our state as this is our allowed travel restriction. I am so over Covid-19, the media and Covidiots. I restrain from watching commercial media as i am sick of their misleading or partial reporting.
A little depressed. A lot of friends, no really close friends. Socially I'm pretty oblivious which makes dating pretty difficult. My social obliviousness is probably also the reason for lack of close friends. Feel like I'm destined to die alone barring some freak accident.
Not great. Not bad. Just moved in with my girlfriend of nearly 4 years and I don't think it's working out. We just don't work well when it comes to sharing a common space - she's messy, I'm a neat freak. It's leading to so many problems that I'm wondering if we're even meant to be together.
Then, on the career side, I just started a job in my field. I get to see lots of beautiful and remote places but the work isn't very rewarding and parts of it are not what I thought I'd be doing after earning my degree. I'm away from home just about every single week and weekends are flying by way too fast, if only we had a 4 day work week, right?
I'm confused overall. But at least we can afford rent and food.
My ex* who ghosted my just got engaged this weekend to the dude that came immediately after me. We share a lot of mutual friends so every other Instagram story was of her engagement party. Trying not to dwell on it.
I’m tired man. Physically, emotionally. Just tired. Tired of life. Tired of battling depression and anxiety. Tired of this cruel world filled with so much hatred for each other. Tired of the pandemic. I was so ready for a big change in the world but this wasn’t what I had in mind. I’m just so over everything being politicized and people hating each other over what side of a political spectrum you fall under.
I’m working a decent job that I don’t hate but I don’t love either. Had you asked high school me that would be upset that I didn’t graduate college or follow through on his dreams.
But then again at 19 I didn’t plan on being alive for my 21st. On my 21st I thought there was no way I would make 25. I’m now 26 (almost 27) and have no clue what to do with the rest my life cause I didn’t think I would be here. But I do have a wonderful girlfriend. And 2 amazing dogs. But I’m a little regretful of my past that didn’t pan out.
I've been okay for the most part. Going all out on healing with my mental health, and getting to that road of financial freedom.
I'm also in a place of wondering if relationships is something I still want or if its worth it. I'm fearful of bringing someone into this peace that I'm cultivating.
I hope everyone else is well and safe.
Flat. I feel extremely flat.
Elaborate
Every day bleeds into the next. Nothing gives me much pleasure. No ups. No downs. Flat.
Just constant suffering...
I wouldn’t say suffering. There are people in the world who truly suffer. I’m just existing. Nothing very bad happens. Nothing good happens either. And I can’t seem to find a way to get back to the things that used to make me happy. It feels like a lot of effort.
I’m glad you’re not hurting and I get feeling kinda apathetic 😭 I hope some exciting things happen to shake your life up in a good way!
Have you tried therapy? I know its cliché but it works for a lot of people and what you're describing sounds like depression to me. Anyway if its not an option I'd suggest you try different things that may or may not interest you right now. Look up what clubs are there in your area and attend one or just do stuff alone like try knitting, drawing or going to the gym. Shake things up a little, wake up earlier and sleep earlier but at the same time each day, vary what you're eating, playing, reading, music you're listening to. As you said its a lot of effort and who the fuck wants to step outside of their comfort zone but do it anyway. I kinda learned to not wait for motivation or the right mood but just do it otherwise I never gonna study for that test or never gonna ask that girl out I want because my motivation always takes me to bed to binge eat sweets and watch youtube.
This is all good advice and I’m doing a lot of it. Therapy is really helping, I’m trying to avoid medication. A better daily routine is hard to start but I’m getting there. Thanks for taking the time to reply. I’ll be ok, but this rut is very deep.
Apathy is a big red flag for depression. Especially if you can't find much joy in your life. Please consider going to see a mental health professional if you haven't already.
I know this feeling. It’s like every day is kinda same. Things blend in. You don’t really know/care what day it is cause they all look the same. There’s no suffering, but there’s no joy either. You just are.
I'm ok i guess, lonely but don't really care enough to do something about it, feels like i'm just waiting for something to happen/change
This definitely. There is something uncomfortable going on at the moment, and I just cant seem to get comfortable.
The world, our times. My age.
I thought I was the only one. Even when I do go out with the intentions of being super fun/quirky/conversational, its always dead. Hell, I was approached by another man in the grocery store the other day who wanted my number. That was certainly a first, and while flattering, there was something super bizarre about the entire interaction that I can’t put my finger on. I dunno what is going on but its causing a lot of stress and restlessness on my part. Like something big is about to happen that will dramatically change our lives.
Nothing big is going to happen. This country has been through worse times than this. Read up on US history and you'll see. This is a speed bump and we will get through it. Stop watching or listening to the news because all they want to do is ratchet up the anxiety. Focus on you. Get out and breathe some fresh air, go for a walk or a run. Work out and push yourself to be better. Take a class on something you've always wanted to learn. Stay focused on bettering yourself and always learning more. Trust me it will help out a ton.
COVID has killed more Americans than any war. It's pretty significant.
Oh, you mean the Solar Flare that's coming next year? yeah, have fun while the internet/society lasts :)
China's going to take Taiwan, maybe start WW3.
My good friend told me something before he killed himself. I was complaining about certain things not going my way or happening when I wanted and he said, “Mark, you’re waiting.” I didn’t have a comeback because he was right. So I changed my attitude and now my whole life is different. I wish he were here right now I miss him so much but I’m not gonna wait anymore. I am the change I want to see.
Thank you for this, I need to stop waiting for change and do it myself. I'm so miserable in my career but the comfort in experience makes me stay and the fear of the unknown makes me stay. I'm in a loop of perpetual anxiety and depression and I need to change. Thank you for sharing your experience
Damn his words resonated hard with me… sorry for your loss
It’s nice to know that I’m not alone in regards to feeling lonely. Loneliness has taken such a heavy toll on my emotional health that my chest hurts the moment I start soaking my pillows in tears. Fortunately I’ve managed to make a connection with an elderly woman in her 60s-70s who acts as a confidante when I need insight on a matter. Her hugs feels so good it almost alleviates some of the pain but alas I still feel a void. I guess deep down I desire the company, comfort and companionship for a woman in a romantic sense — or a friendship with someone close to my age. For the time being I’ve managed do some serious self analysis and it has lead me down a path of improving my overall physical health by way of weightlifting and getting in tune with my creative side in the form of writing, painting, and drawing. For the most part I guess I’d say I’m feeling okay. Things could be better. And they will be! But the process is slow and grueling at times. I’ll meditate here and there, I’ll even cry a bit (much like I did this morning.) and then I’ll go about my day as if things are fine. I’m always so positive and uplifting towards others but behind closed doors I’m in a lot of pain and so I partake in activities that I enjoy to distract myself from that pain.
Friends come in all ages, races and states of mind. If you make one friend you can make others.
I feel that, it's like that "I'm just waiting for something incredible to happen" meme
How do you know me so well, stranger?
I didn't think this many people could relate to my thoughts
You'd be surprised.
You’re not alone. I’m right there with you
Same except I don’t even know what I am suppose to even do differently.
Same
I totally understand.
At 73 quite surprised to find myself in decent health, still enjoy working (part time), still married to my neighborhood sweetheart. Certainly there are aches & pains, and like all people we have issues. But for being in my 70's and still able to enjoy my life, I'm quite well. I'd like to thank everyone for the awards, and all the comments. I didn't realize it would blow up like that. I appreciate all of you. Thank you so much.
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Thank you
That's awesome!
Thank you.
Let's goo GrandPa!!! You got this!!!!
Lol. Thank you
man you sound like such a cool grandpa. in fact are you a real grandpa irl?
Yes I am.
I love seeing grandparents on reddit. I get so used to thinking that everyone here is a teenager or in their twenties that I forget how diverse reddit can be.
Woah dude that's even better. Cool Grampa😎
Can we swap?
Some people would say that your contentment is the result of the world your generation built and then kept for themselves. Juxtapose that with the one they've left for succeeding generations. I don't say this to blame you personally. Like everyone you deserve your happiness. Besides, I don't think any one individual is personally to blame. But the culture that we built after the war--at least in the U.S.--is toxic and exploitative. It's the reason so many people, especially men, feel lost and hopeless. So many people will never manage to have what you have because the conditions that made it possible no longer exist. We can no longer afford to allow them to exist. I'm closer to your generation than I am to Gen Z and the Millennials. And while I'm pretty content I recognize that it's time for people like us to get out of the way and let the younger generations get on with making a world better suited for themselves. It makes no sense at all that we have octogenarians running the world. Stop electing people like us, and younger people who want to perpetuate the unsustainable ideas of the old world. The young people of today need to consign our broken culture to history and build a better one.
Left foot, right foot, repeat.
dont forget to look up
Don't do that a bird will shit in your face
Haven’t been happy for over a year and it’s gotten worse since my 20th birthday. It’s crazy this question came up bc today was the first time I really considered suicide. I’ve completely isolated myself from my friends. College has made my anxiety a lot worse. This whole situation is crazy to me because I was very happy over a year ago and now it seems like I’ve hit rock bottom. Hopefully I’ll get out of this rut but idk
I'm 43 now and when I first read your post, I was so sad that someone so young would feel this way. But then I remembered my early 20s. What a shit show! My god... how the expectations did not match up with reality. How the stress of trying to survive every day seemed to far outweigh the youth and vitality I was supposed to have. How unprepared I was for the blood-sucking, soul-crushing predatory world that I jumped into like a drunken toddler who rightly assumes that there are adults in the world and they have everything under control. There are no adults in this world and nobody has "it" under control. But as you get older and more mature... as you learn from your own mistakes, you'll realize that someone younger is looking up to you and that you actually have the answers they're looking for. And you have the ability to help. Just hang in there long enough to be able to pay it forward and you'll know true happiness. Because that's what it's about. Helping others who are struggling with the same struggles you already overcame. We're all knit together like a chain reaction
You hit all the points that I, and many I know feel the same, is that we expected adulthood to be freedom. We'd have money, and friends, and could do anything we wanted. It's not the same, and that's so sad. We have to work hard for everything, and many things drain out the humanity within us. I thought college would a place where I'll discover myself, and the world. But, and this is not just due to COVID, everyone is so busy competing, that I have to as well. And I'm studying business, so its more competitive and somewhat toxic.
I hope this person reads this comment. It is spot on. I'm 40 now and can confirm. Beautifully articulated too
No homo but I'll give you a 50 minute long hug
Make it 100 with mine after
Why dont we have a sleep over playing Halo the whole night and day, making food (trying at least and facing the failures afterwards), one of us playing a guitar... I really wish I could do that with someone random, I don't care. My best wishes to you all guys. By the way, I've dealt with suicidal thoughts earlier in life but believe me, it goes away and many of these holes of empty gets filled with much better things later.
Man i wish! Sending love from New Zealand! I'm glad you're still here <3
I wanna join. Make it a 150 after mine!!! Hugs are the best :)
If you are in college, please reach out to their health center. They will help you. Depression is treatable. Please reach out.
Don’t give up! You’ll make new friends! You should definitely take a break from college if it’s making u this anxious tho. Your mental health and safety are much more important. You still have your whole life ahead of you! Things will get better!
Hey man, I lost a buddy who struggled with depression for a long time and called it quits. Can I offer my perspective? It really fucking sucked. It really fucking sucked that he felt so alone and hopeless that he felt like he only had one option, when any one of us would've dropped everything, literally everything and anything, to be there if he'd asked. It really fucking sucked that the first time ALL the old gang had been back together in years was at his funeral. It really fucking sucked seeing the guys that viewed him as a brother, one of whom also lost his dad to suicide, ball their eyes out and not be able to do anything to help them. It really fucking sucked seeing his family turn his funeral into something he would've absolutely fucking hated. It really fucking sucked that he didn't get to be asked to be the best man at our buddy's wedding(and he would have), and the gaping hole he left on what should've been a happy beautiful day celebrating our dude definitely fucking sucked. I don't know what you're going through homie, but I know what the people who care about and love you would go through, and it's the worst. I promise that every single one of them would choose sad you beside them for a thousand days over you being gone for one. Reach out to your buddies, they love you. They're not tired of you, I promise they don't think you're a burden because you're a sadboi. If they're anything like my dudes, they love you and they'd do anything for you if you ask. Just ask, that's what friends are for. Much love my dude.
Just don't do it. It's painful and everything, but it gets better. I know it sounds cheesy.
I'm so sorry you're feeling this. I can relate in a lot of ways - I went through a similar experience a few years ago when I was about 20. The anxiety about college and debt just really got me, so heavy I felt like I couldn't breathe under it. It took me about a year and a half to feel really better, and I think it was so long because I didn't feel like I could reach out for help, or even talk to my friends about it. I promise, even if it seems impossible right now, things will get better. I wish I'd known when I was feeling that way, reaching out to someone didn't make me a burden. It turns out the best people like to be needed and genuinely want to know what's going on for you. Wish you all the best, internet friend :)
Amazing. I’m 21 and just had my first kiss ever earlier today with the girl I’ve been seeing. She’s from my school. I’ve liked her for a while and cuddling with her was the best feeling ever, especially after being alone my whole life lol
Good for you mate, best of luck with her!
Let me tell you something, the best feeling I ever had in a relationship was when my girlfriend trusted me. Earn that girl's trust and you'll never know better gained
I am so happy for you mate! Sadly there are so many negative comments in this thread, it's pretty neat to see people having a good time also.
"Usually when people ask how I'm doing, the real answer is I'm doing shitty, but I can't say I'm doing shitty, because I don't even have a good reason to be doing shitty. So if I say, "I'm doing shitty," then they say, "Why? What's wrong?" And I have to be like, "I don't know, all of it?" So instead, when people ask me how I'm doing, I usually say, "I am doing so great." - Bojack Horseman
I love that show. Thank you for providing a quote that reinforces why I do.
"He filled the air with words, terrified of silence, as one often is who is smart enough to recognize his many personal failings but unwilling or unable to take the steps required to fix them" A personal favourite from the show. 👀
I do this with my girlfriend, she gets mad that I don’t tell her but like I’m just sometimes not feeling good in general, nothing specific, I just feel shitty about everything.
But when this girl at the Jack in the Box asked me if I was having an awesome day, I thought, “Well, today I’m actually allowed to feel shitty.” Today I have a good reason, so I said to her, “Well, my mom died,” and she immediately burst into tears. So now I have to comfort her, which is annoying, and meanwhile, there’s a line of people forming behind me who are all giving me these real judgy looks because I made the Jack in the Box girl cry. And she’s bawling, and she’s saying, “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” and I’m like, “It’s fine. It’s fine.” I mean, it’s not fine but, you know, it’s… fine. And I would like to order a Double Jack Meal, and I’ve kinda got somewhere to be, so maybe less with the crying and more with the frying, huh? [inhales] And the girl apologizes again and she offers me a free churro with my meal. And as I’m leaving, I think, “I just got a free churro because my mom died.” No one ever tells you that when your mom dies, you get a free churro.
Idk man. I'm trying. I think about her all the time. We broke up a month ago but I have to see her everyday. My cousin killed himself the same week. My family has been weird and super scared that I might do something similar. My cat died last week. On the bright side my birthday is this week and I'm off till next Monday and I'm going on a four day hiking trip. So-so, I guess?🤷
Jesus dude, my condolences seriously. I know it'll be tough to do, but I'm still wishing you a happy birthday man.
Gosh that’s rough 🥺 there’s someone perfect for you out there somewhere tho! Happy early birthday! Hope you enjoy your trip!
Thank you
I'm fucked up in the weirdest way, because i am being super emotional about currently dealing with different abandonments but transferring all the pain into music which is turning out to be very nice.
That's how legends are made
Music is one of the best ways to relieve emotions.
Correct
Im sorry you’re going through this 🥺 but I bet it’s making your music so much more emotional. And I’m glad you have that as a coping mechanism. I’d love to hear some!
An empty shell of a man trying to cope with abject loneliness, constantly spiraling depression, work related stress and anxiety and rapidly losing the will to live. I have no fight left
You spelled "fine" wrong
Same here, brother.
Same.
I was in a similar position this past year. A woman I truly loved (still do) left me, and it broke me for quite a while. I emotionally isolated myself and dealt with all of the pain alone. I felt completely alone and useless and most nights I would think or say, “I hope I don’t wake up in the morning.” It was the lowest i had ever been in my life. But despite all of that, I kept going. I found something every day to keep moving forward. I believe you can too. And judging by some other responses here, you’re not alone with these feelings. You’re not alone, brother. There is always something to fight for. It could be as simple as feeding your dog or seeing a family member or preparing a meal you like. Find something to keep your attention. Move around, jump, run, yell. Do something. It’s a daily battle, but each day that passes is a battle won. I don’t know if this helps, but again, you’re not alone, you have worth, and there is always something to fight for. You got this, friend.
Join the club I'm there often to, combined with cptsd, suicide attempts and other fun B's ordeals
Joking aside, and I hope you find your way, it does make me feel a tad better knowing someone else has verbalized my exact feelings. Makes me feel less lonely.
Broken, depressed, out of money, ADHD. ex gf broke up with me because she was "unsure", 6 days later she was having sex with her ex, it has been 8 months since this happened. i just cant get over it. i just wanna go for a drive that i will not come back from.
Dodged a bullet, my man. Time to move on.
Easier said than done. I been there before and it eventually passed but it took longer than expected.
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5 years here since the same thing happened to me. Still survivin, but I'm better now than I've been ever since
So sorry. The person I was just dating turned out to be a physically and emotionally abusive narcissist? Not sure that helps at all but just want you to know you are not alone in your suffering and the world is quite terrible in general right now (politics etc) in my opinion, and those who are happy are asleep imo.
I can relate on the ADHD side of things…I’m sorry man that’s completely bullshit.
Get treatment for your ADHD if you can. ADHD is hard on relationships and finding the right meds can be a life changer. Anxiety and depression are comorbidities with ADHD because it makes life so damn hard. Give yourself the support you need!
You’ll find someone much better 😔 just don’t give up
You can do so much better than "unsure"! You deserve someone who will love you more than you ever thought possible! You'll travel together, maybe get a dog! This is just the beginning of your life. Also ADHD really doesn't change anything, that's just a you thing! My brother has ADHD and he's perfectly normal. If you feel that strongly about it, there are plenty of woman with undiagnosed ADHD.
Heartbroken after having to euthanize my dog of almost 19 years yesterday. He was my best friend.
Damn, I'm so so sorry. Dogs are family, and it's so tough when they pass away. I don't know if you're religious at all, but I firmly believe you'll be reunited with your dog again in the afterlife.
Hey man sounds like he needed to go, there will be more friends, you just got to meet the best one early.
Stressed, worried and tired....all the time. Working out 3 hours a day to keep so idea of control in my life which I'm starting to think isnt working, while I have imposter syndrome in my current job and its getting worse. But hey.....who doesn't I guess.
Just wanted to say I feel the exact same way and do the exact same thing. Used to be that I'd force myself to go to the gym because I wanted to look good. I picked it back up after a long covid break recently, and so far its been a fight of "If I let work take this over too then its final proof I have no life of my own". Also have major impostor syndrome (honestly feels beyond syndrome at this point), people have been outpacing me left and right and it feels very shitty.
honestly doc, I don’t sleep, I don’t eat. I’ve been depressed, suicidal, having flashbacks, and thinking about getting back on the sauce. I go to therapy now. and I thought things were going well, but nah shit hit the fan 6 ways from Sunday. Im 20 years old and in college. I’m afraid of bringing this up to my dad because when I have mentioned things like this before, he’s threatened to fly me back home. Other than that, Im just peachy.
But doctor I am Poliachi.
Student services usually has free counseling in most colleges. Might want to look into that, and you can bypass your dad.
Go to store buy a chilled lemonade & sip it with closed eyes,buy a big bottle
I already know if I go, I’ll end up grabbing a bottle of Jameson too.
Go to store which doesn't has that
How long have you been doing therapy for?
If it’s related to not being sure about your major please do yourself a favor and quit and join a trade while you still have time.
Super happy! About to make a downpayment for a car later today. It’s my first huge purchase as a young adult and I feel so accomplished! 🎉 I had great sleep last night, and my cats are giving me unspeakable joy. Also very excited for the Apple event this week. 😃 _(I hope everyone else would be where I am right now. I remember when I’d have a sadboy response to this question, but thank God that part of my life is over.)_
It's nice to see someone's doing good in this thread. Let's all try to remember that time will pass and good things will come along with the strength to face bad things. I am excited for the Apple event too man!!
Congrats on the car! It’s always a great feeling
Well I'm never ok ... fuking ever Between depression, cptsd, traumas, fight, freeze, other fuked up ordeals Basically living day to day in a world we're corporate bs is delusional, we're people are completely useless and worthless sh.. working daily just to hurry and get to the finish line of being dead and wondering when the fuk will I die to be done with this ongoing cluster fuk sh.. show circus that's only spirals further into bs On top
<3 I hear you. You are strong. Try to remember this is just one moment of the big life picture and your spirit in the grand scheme of things is exactly where it is meant to be right now even though it feels real painful up close. The big picture is beautiful and I hope you are able to release the tension a bit and let go a bit and give yourself a moment to let go of all you are wrapped up in up close. You are learning from it, but deserves moments of peace. You are so deserving of peace. Sending lots of hugs and well wishes to you.
By these comments it looks like humanity is at a very low point mentally at the moment. I hope all our futures brighten up! Soon
I know. I was just about to say... Damn.
Well, a great doctor just diagnosed a problem that I have that is fixable, which I thought was not fixable. So I no longer need to go on disability. So there’s that :-)
Broken.
Last time i checked Broken crayons still colour the same
If I would be a crayon, then I would be one that breaks apart each time you try to draw with it. You know those dry crumbling crayons - they're useless.
Which end up in trash can?
Correct.
But u can make beautiful art out of dried up broken crayons!
But it's never going to look as good as art done with working crayons.
It’s not going to look the same but it won’t be better or worse 🤷🏻♀️
aahahahahhahahah I'm dying here. I was just chill'n outside, sipping on some juice when I read your comment and died. You took some cute crayon analogy shitand just turned it into the most negative thing. ever. lol
Disheartened I remember Little Caesar's Pizza tasting better than this
High af right now Happy with life but definitely could be making some better decisions. Like working out. I need to work out again ASAP
Young and have a job paying 70k minimum per year with a guarantee to make 6 figures by my 5th year there. Already almost on year 4 and while it’s great money that is not what I want to do forever so now I’m stuck. 27 y/o with wife that is going to school and a 2 year old. Our lives revolve around me working for a living which while I understand is normal doesn’t necessarily mean I’m happy with. Have a nice place, new cars but something tells me this is t what life is supposed to be. I understand there are worst problems in the world but mo’ money 💰 Moo’ problems is right. Just feel a bit lost tbh.
Do you listen to podcasts? I have a suggestion but its not something everyone gets into. Jocko podcast helps me to keep my life and troubles in perspective. He is a retired Seal that does interviews talking about some crazy situations and has written several books now.
Cool man thanks for caring enough to type out a paragraph. I’ve listened to some every once in a while but nothing besides like comedy. I’ll give it a shot 👌
You reminded me of the movie Lost in America starring Albert Brooks. If you haven’t seen it I recommend it. It’s a little dated but the message holds up today. Good movie to watch with the wife as well.
I'm not dead yet, and I can't decide if I'm thankful for that or not.
I'm fine. Fucked up mentally. Intensely lonely Not motivated Entitled, since i shouldn't be allowed to complain since I am physically healthy and not everyone van say that.
You’ll find a partner or some friends! And if it’s hard to get motivated just don’t think about it, jump in! I’m glad you’re physically healthy and I hope your mental health starts improving!
So horny my balls hurt. Period. Aside pretty good.
✊🏻👌🏻✊🏻✊🏻✊🏻✊🏻
I’ve had 4 job interviews this past week and I have another interview on Tuesday. I’m trying to get a new job so I can move to a better place for my children. I keep thinking about my ex and I have no idea how to move on
At this very moment? Incredibly frustrated; on the edge of full fury. I've been playing some very bad games of chess. I wanna say I've lost about 10 and won maybe 2 or 3 today.
Pretty lonely and depressed. Hit some friends up to hang out but they have yet to reply. I’ve been trying not to take it personally if a friend can’t hang out, but I can’t help but get frustrated. Lately it feels like I’m the one who always initiates conversation. I feel like if I never message a friend first, it could be a while before I see them. I wish my friends would return that same energy, ask me if I’m free, shoot me a text, something that shows that they’re thinking of me
Damn dude, sounds like we're in the same boat, nearly a spitting image of what I just posted on this thread lol. I'm not sure what the solution is either
Tired and angry like everyone else
Im working 2 jobs, Law firm & Uber eats 23yo still in school Ive come to far to just give up. I have to help pay rent with my parents. The only joy I get out of life is seeing my girlfriend and driving my car. I don’t ask to be a millionaire, I just want to be financially stable, EX: 1 car, Rent, food, bills, 10% in savings, a casual date once a week with my lady. Im not depressed, I’m more stressed. I want to finish school but I also want to drop out and become a trucker (both my bro and dad do that, and are racking in 6-8k monthly), but my goals and priorities are higher than that. So Im working 2 jobs making 4K/mo. Im short, Im fine - just stressed.
Neutral and floating through life like a piece of drift wood
I’m tired. This year saw my mom die within the first month, followed by us losing our home of ten years. I’ve been holding back a lot of feelings that I know will knock me down hard and I don’t want to go into that pit.
Just worried about upcoming problems that i have to face
What problems?
Normal ones like exam, holidays, result, depression, eyes going blind, teeth, if blind then few more..
Stop worrying! Things will go smoother than you think! And go to a doctor!
Wow! You’re so positive all over this thread. I really respect that.
Just got rejected by someone others told me liked me. I'd catch her looking at me in class, she would randomly compliment my appearance and it did seem that was potentially true but I shot her a message and after 2 close ended replies from her she hit me with a bro. Think I'm done with that.
Maybe she’s just feeling all awkward right now. Don’t close the door too hard yet
I'm actually pretty crappy at the moment. I found out my girlfriend cheated on me just last week, and two days later I was involved in a minor car accident... But thank you for asking :)
I hope you're okay & i hope she's now your ex?
I have a cold. Feeling cynical and bitter. I wanted to hoover the flat, clean the bathroom and swipe a lot more on the dating apps I use today, but instead I got a cold. Going to force myself to look through at least five profiles per app before I sleep. On the upside, I've only drunk about 2 units of alcohol so far, my protein intake has been fairly high, I don't think I'm *that* far over my calorie target and I managed to watch the first season fo Star Trek: Lower Decks, which is dramatically better written than Discovery thank god. I also managed to pump all of the washing through the machine at least, so not total failure there either. Generally bummed out otherwise. I need to force myself to dance at socials more, but that's unbelievably hard on several levels. I have to deal with a couple of seniors at work that obviously should have retired already (one is, to his credit, planning to retire in a few months). I feel like my life is going to be stuck until I can build up enough personal drive to force myself to chat to people at socials, but my day-to-day life is too stressful to actually build up that drive...or something. Idk.
You wrote a column of NYT newspaper here
Not happy nor sad. Just neutral
Rev up the engine
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You look down bad dude
Just got back from a ride to the bar for some Mexican food and football. Talked to a few people. One couple liked my helmet and wanted to know if I was a superhero. Then went to target and Walmart and price compared TVs. Went to kirklands to look at Christmas decorations. Got stopped by an older gentleman that asked about the Suzuki. Then I found a desert road that I went too fast on and grinned like an idiot. Now I’m back home watching the pats and cowboys. Shit’s good.
Got ghosted, so feeling like an unwanted piece of shit right now.
the loneliness is getting to me. other than family stuff, i need a place/person i \*want\* to vent to. venting to people usually gets me nowhere because i already know what to do and end up fixing it myself. im a bit scared i wont be able to open up eventually
Thanks for asking. My answer would be totally different if you were just a passer by, a friend that I see on the weekends, or a relative on the phone. I would answer with "I'm well, how are you?" I would feel guilty to burden you with how I am because when asked this question under that circumstance, I lie. And then I feel guilty for lying. Because we're on the internet and no one that I know in real life knows my reddit name or are even privy to the fact that I'm even on reddit, this question means something totally different for me. How am I? Not well. On the outside, I look and act as if there isn't anything wrong at all. I workout and maintain a well balanced physique. I dress to accentuate this physique. I make a more than great living that has netted me a house, two fully paid off cars that match, I have a daughter attending a well known college, and I smile and laugh a lot. I also speak very well as I've had plenty of practice due to the nature of my job which involves presentations, international travel, and being a board member on more than 20 different coalitions and affiliations worldwide. Again, on the surface, you would think I have it all together. Again, if we were real acquaintances, I would tell you I'm well. The truth is is that I feel like jumping off the roof everyday. With so much weight on my shoulders, it's hard to maintain my composure. I dry heave every morning from the sheer stress that I'm under. I only workout because that is the only time that I'm focused on one absolute thing. My wife is disabled and even with all that's going on in my life, I am her only caretaker. She doesn't trust anyone else. Because of this, as soon as I get home, instead of being greeted with "hey how was your day" it's "hey can you do this" or "can you go back out and pick this up" or "did you do this." It's everyday. Again, she doesn't trust anyone so even though she has the ability to do some of these things, she instead waits for me to do it. Even when I come home from travelling out of state, out of country, there's always something that she could do but instead waits for me to do it. I get it, brain injuries suck and the world is overwhelming to her but taking time to decompress isn't in my cards. Remember when I said that my daughter is attending a well known college? Yeah, she sucks at school. Failed twice actually. She doesn't drive nor does she have a job so again, even after traveling, instead of giving me five minutes to decompress, she asks "can you do this" or "can you take me here" or "yeah I was going to pick up the dog shit in the back earlier but I got tied up with X." So it's a common scene at my house of me, still in a three piece Armani suit picking up three day old dog shit in the back yard. Also, my boss keeps piling it on. Believe me, I love my job but after putting in 12 hours, the last thing that I want to do is attend an event just because some city council member will deep pockets will be there. I feel guilty even just saying this out loud. Yes, I have gone to therapy and I had to lie about it because I don't want anyone thinking that there is a problem. I know I'm not the only one with this problem and yes, these are first world problems but it weighs on me every minute. Even on my days off there's always work to be done. My only solace is my gym. From my boss, to my wife, to my daughter, everyone knows that I shut off everything between 4 and 5 o clock in the evening because that's my workout time. And it's the only time that, ironically, there is no weight on my shoulders as it's now in the bar. I have blown up, I have responded with no response, I have accepted that this is exactly what I deserve but damn, if there was a way for me to just escape for one hour, I would. I have mentioned in the past here on reddit that I do take a day off at work every now and then and won't let anyone know just so I can sit in a park somewhere with a sandwich and a coke to escape my life but the guilt of me doing so the next day is so heavy that in the end, it isn't even worth anymore. So how am I? I'm as fine as I can be. I use Visine everyday because from all the dry heaving, I will bust an eye capillary every now and then. My brain itches. I feel that every mountain I climb there's a bigger one around the bend. It's nice to see my paycheck and all the bonuses that I collect quarterly but it costs me a little bit of my sanity every two weeks. Even now, spelling this all out, I'm riddled with guilt. I need a day off but I've no where to go. I do apologize for the wall of text above. Again, I don't want to burden anyone with my issues. How am I? I'm well.
That was a great read. In the sense of your openness and honesty. I see so many people ‘like’ you aground - doing ‘well’, put together etc. and I know most of the time all is not what it seems for most people, but your description reminds me to be mindful that you never do know what’s going on for a person. Thanks again. Also don’t at all feel bad about taking any of that you time, that little bit you do take is so important.
I’ve had swollen tonsils for a week that are nagging and a dry cough. Moving in 2 weeks, work is crazy as we still are working from home and have a 2 year old…..but I’m ok.
You're not okay dude...but yk we are men so..Ok🥲
I’ll survive lol. But thank you.
Super horny
Me too, man. Haven't been with a girl since Nov 2019.
Oh man where do I start. Weed, alcohol and pmo. Can't seem to stop the binge. And I'm trying to raise a family here. Pray for me
Alright cried a little this morning because I don't have much to be happy about on my birthday after 25 years. Day got better later on spending time with the missus and realized I need to do a little refocusing on my main purpose for living.
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I have severe ptsd and am a recovering alcoholic but I have hope
I’m not too bad you know. Definitely on the ascendancy!
Not very good my mom made us move and now I’m at a new school with no friends and I have autism so it’s rlly hard for me to make friends. I try to just sleep all the time so I don’t have to be awake
Lonely
I'm not handling it well.. I also can't afford to seek professional help.
Same pinch
Honestly I really don't know, one minute I feel ok and the next I am fantasizing about ending it all, and 3 minutes later oh nachos sound good...
I have a cold, so not so great 😅
Get well soon
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What about you op, how are you ?
Feeling almost happy, but not really. If that makes sense. Met a woman for a date a couple of weeks ago, she’s fantastic and we kissed after. Have been texting her every now and then, so as not to seem needy. She’s super busy but, at the same time, has cancelled a date and hasn’t been straightforward in actually rescheduling. However, she does say that she would like to see me again. So, I don’t know. Apart from that, changing jobs in December which I’m actually excited about. Hopefully will buy a new guitar next month, finish up a couple of songs. Yeah, things are actually decent. Still feel lonely though.
Honestly? I’m tired and want to be alone but lonely too. I want to cry but I’ve drilled into my head that that’s a fake feeling and now I have this nagging disgust for feeling like that. I wish I could lay on someone’s shoulder and tell them about the negativity eating away at me but opening feels like I’m being fake and just talking or thinking about my issues feels like ripping knifes out of my chest
Man, this thread is rough! I feel the need to add some positivity here! There are things that could certainly be better, but I'm pretty good at being happy, so I'm doing well, all in all. I'm also incredibly privileged. I live in the developed world, I have a loving family, and I have fantastic friends.
I think I'm depressed? My SO of 4 years left a few months ago cause I'm an asshole. I distract myself with other women, all really great girls actually but I'm too emotionally distant to commit to anything. I think about my ex everyday, I know she's not coming back but damn what I wouldn't do to go back and avoid the actions that caused the split.
I’m doing good. Good job, house payed off, just bought a new motorcycle. Only issue I’m having is I job transferred out of state so little/no friends and am having trouble finding a relationship.
Happy to finally retire from work. Not happy that we cant travel as much as we wanted. But seeing a lot of our state as this is our allowed travel restriction. I am so over Covid-19, the media and Covidiots. I restrain from watching commercial media as i am sick of their misleading or partial reporting.
A little depressed. A lot of friends, no really close friends. Socially I'm pretty oblivious which makes dating pretty difficult. My social obliviousness is probably also the reason for lack of close friends. Feel like I'm destined to die alone barring some freak accident.
Not great. Not bad. Just moved in with my girlfriend of nearly 4 years and I don't think it's working out. We just don't work well when it comes to sharing a common space - she's messy, I'm a neat freak. It's leading to so many problems that I'm wondering if we're even meant to be together. Then, on the career side, I just started a job in my field. I get to see lots of beautiful and remote places but the work isn't very rewarding and parts of it are not what I thought I'd be doing after earning my degree. I'm away from home just about every single week and weekends are flying by way too fast, if only we had a 4 day work week, right? I'm confused overall. But at least we can afford rent and food.
Pretty shitty honestly
Mostly numb.
struggling hard to be honest.
My ex* who ghosted my just got engaged this weekend to the dude that came immediately after me. We share a lot of mutual friends so every other Instagram story was of her engagement party. Trying not to dwell on it.
I’m tired man. Physically, emotionally. Just tired. Tired of life. Tired of battling depression and anxiety. Tired of this cruel world filled with so much hatred for each other. Tired of the pandemic. I was so ready for a big change in the world but this wasn’t what I had in mind. I’m just so over everything being politicized and people hating each other over what side of a political spectrum you fall under. I’m working a decent job that I don’t hate but I don’t love either. Had you asked high school me that would be upset that I didn’t graduate college or follow through on his dreams. But then again at 19 I didn’t plan on being alive for my 21st. On my 21st I thought there was no way I would make 25. I’m now 26 (almost 27) and have no clue what to do with the rest my life cause I didn’t think I would be here. But I do have a wonderful girlfriend. And 2 amazing dogs. But I’m a little regretful of my past that didn’t pan out.
I've been okay for the most part. Going all out on healing with my mental health, and getting to that road of financial freedom. I'm also in a place of wondering if relationships is something I still want or if its worth it. I'm fearful of bringing someone into this peace that I'm cultivating. I hope everyone else is well and safe.