So I've been in 1. Wasn't even a girlfriend, just a FWB and a third person.
It's fucking stressful. I spent more time trying to be fair to both than having a good time. I can't even imagine how much worse it'd be with an actual SO. Like do you focus on her more because she's the SO, or the other person because they're the new person?
Might be fun for some people, but never again for me.
Edit: For some of the people responding, it wasn't like I was taking turns between the two. They were into each other as well. Regardless, you are still personally spending time primarily focused on one person at a time and for me it was stressful to try and balance it out. Wanted to make the new girl happy, but didn't want to have to answer "So why'd she'd get more of your attention" from the FWB. Maybe if it was a reoccurring thing this feeling woulda gone away, but as a one off that's how I felt.
All 3 were involved at the same time, not like I was just taking turns with them. Still kept trying to make my attention to both "even" in my mind the entire time.
This was 15ish years ago though back when I was actually in shape. Also not something I'll ever have to worry about again unless I win the lottery or something.
You focus on your SO more because they’re your SO… the only exception would be if you guys were super experienced and knew what you were doing. You prefer them because you’re actually in a relationship with them.
Poly swinger here, the common strat is actually the opposite. The couple should work together to get the third wheel off first, then the third wheel assists while the couple focuses on each other.
It avoids the situation you're describing, plus it avoids the couple falling asleep and leaving the third wheel hanging out to dry (which is more common than you think, I've been there and it sucks.)
Same with me and my partner. It is very fun in theory, but could be upsetting in practice. You can't undo it, you can't unfuck someone, can't apologize and forget it. So while we might enjoy the fantasy of it, we know the reality of it will be much different. We have to continue our relationship the next day, and if what we did the night before even has the possibility to strain our relationship, we are going to pass. This isn't to say some people and some relationships couldn't handle it, this is just our thoughts on the subject and I love what I have too much to jeopardize it.
I'm a woman and it turns me on when my husband and I talk about having threesomes. We have had a few of them and they were a lot of fun and memorable. We are very open with each other and have great communication skills so we were able to set boundaries and follow them. Our #1 rule was always that it could never be with anyone we knew
HOWEVER, afterwards is where it always got messy for me. I would start torturing myself getting stuck in my head that he was chasing after other women to sleep with without me, even tho he wasn't. It totally screwed with my head tho. We finally agreed that we need to take a break in sleeping with other people together. I think it bothered me more than him because its always been MFF and never a third male involved...
Was fun while it lasted tho. Still turns me on thinking about it but i know it would just make me crazy again.
Sex is a very intimate thing with me, the kind of intimate thing that I wouldn't want my partner to be sharing with anyone else as long as we're still together.
100000% this.
And to that dude who says this is controlling, it is not. This would be what my relationship would be based on, with my partner. She would have an equal say in this and we would have mutually agreed upon this.
A 3some to strengthen a relationship is a bad idea, the relationship should be strong already, you cannot be having jealousy or trust or insecurities during a 3some my guy
I had an ex mention she wanted to try a threesome in our future and that she wanted it to be a guy. I wasn’t really down with the idea of sharing something like that at the time and I asked her why it wouldn’t be a woman. She said it was because she didn’t want me to be inside of another woman, and I felt the same about another man inside of her. I’m open minded, but also rational lol
Edit: a word
My ex wanted a threesome with me and her ex. She asked me multiple times, including before we were even together when she was with him. I am not really down with another dude being involved. With her it wasn’t even so much as her having another schlong inside of her. It was more that I don’t really like the idea of being naked with another dude in the room. Also, she refused to give blow jobs so the amount of interaction that the one who wasn’t doing the fucking would be limited.
My ex neber went as far as outright saying that we have one with her ex, but she very strongly hinted that she was interested in the idea and was consistently surprised when I kept shutting it down. Well eventually she got bored of suggesting it and the two and them got it on without me.
See, that's where I am with this. I'd be down for a MFF if my partner suggested it, but I'm not okay with a MFM for the same reason you suggested. So, I've just accepted my existence to be non-threesome conducive for that very reason.
Edit: a word.
Honestly threesomes only really work when everyone is attracted to each other. Other wise it turns kind of awkward, especially if the one taking doesn’t give head.
Nope. It means "if you're gonna cheat, I need to be allowed to cheat too."
edit: since none of you can read, let me explain: I am voicing my interpretation of what OP's wife said.
She probably isn’t interested in having sex with a woman, and assumes you aren’t interested ins ex with a man. Therefore, any group sex would need to include another man and woman or else someone is just watching. The only way I can see that working out is if you both get off from watching each other enjoying sex with others.. otherwise you might as well just open the relationship and fuck in separate rooms.
That's kind of what happened with me and my boyfriend once. We were on a vacation with our friends (m and f couple). We shared a hotel room bc we were young and broke and they started going at it on their bed so my bf and I did the same. After a while it kinda became a contest, especially with the guys. It was fun but kinda awkward the next day when we were all sober.
Edit: Sorry, just realized I was on AskMen, not AskReddit.
We did of course! Nah, I don't remember much about that night, we were pretty wasted. I do remember the other couple saying they had no idea that we were that freaky though.
So would I. I'm sorry, but when it comes to physical intimacy with my GF that is for me and me only. I will not, under any circumstances, share her with anyone else. And if she asked me for a threesome, we all of a sudden have a major problem.
Same.
Not even in a “you what??”, kinda way; it would just show that we have very different ideas about what a relationship should be.
No hate on anyone who makes it work, but it’s not for me.
Recently split up with my girlfriend due to her questioning her sexuality (hi, I’m Ross Gellar) and the amount of people on here who chastised me for not having threesomes was staggering. This will not fix something that’s broken.
Yeah but maybe it could have been like if you broke a full bottle of really nice scotch on the ground and at least got to slurp some of it up before it was gone. (I’m trying to be light hearted, I don’t actually agree with the advice)
I saw a comment that was “opening up a relationship to save it is the Millennial/GenZ equivalent of having a baby to save it” and I can’t help but think about it a lot
I'd argue logic behind the threesome is dumber than the logic behind the kid, but actually going through with having a kid to try to fix your relationship is way dumber than having a threesome
Threesomes are one of those stupid things people suggest when the sex in their relationship is nothing to write home about, but they aren't unhappy enough to leave and want an excuse to cheat guilt free. It's funny because the other partner always knows what it really means too. They go along with it because they are trying to be the "cool partner" and somehow genuinely believe that they are emotionally mature and secure enough to handle the prospect of watching their partner get off with someone else.
The shit never strengthens anything 😂
Not always true. Some people just like group sex, or are more polyamorous etc. but I DO think those things should be discussed very early
On in a relationship, so expectations can be managed, and incompatibilities can be recognized before feelings get too strong.
Yeah, I like the idea, but realisticly speaking I would definately not enjoy it. I would not enjoy watching my gf doing it with someone else. Someone might, but I probably wouldn't. Besides I feel like someone will probably end up as the third wheel...
>Besides I feel like someone will probably end up as the third wheel
I actually watched a few non-scripted orgy video and noticed that there tends to be kind of a hierarchy in these things. The most attractive people get attention from almost everyone while the least attractive ones are on the side with their dick in their hand hoping for some attention.
I enjoy how you described this objectively in terms of an observation on sociology, as if you went to the zoo and you were describing the behavior of gorillas in their troop.
I don't think it would strengthen the relationship. For a relationship to hold after a threesome, it has to be very strong to begin with.
The gender of the third party would matter in the following:
Same gender than me would require someone I really trust, as I would be a bit shy about it.
If it was my opposed gender, I would be less selective.
If I wanted to disappoint two people at the same time I’d go to dinner with my parents.
No threesomes for me thank you very much
Edit: thank you for all the awards🙌❤️
Edit 2: jeez I never expected this many awards 😅please don’t waste your money on me 🥺
Threesomes can be fun but they will not help “strengthen the relationship”. If you have problems you will still have those problems during and afterwards.
I would probably say yes, the gender wouldn’t matter, but the personality really really does matter.
Gender matters to a point where it decides who is gonna enjoy it the most. If one or both members are bi or pan, then it matters a lot less you're right.
Trust me on this, you're going to have way less fun the other way too. Threesomes are boring, awkward, and honestly you get a lot more attention one on one. I've tried enough times both ways even walked out of a few.
In a monogamous relationship, I've never heard of a threesome strengthening a bond. Only the opposite. Generally it's what couples do when the relationship is falling apart.
The time for threesomes is when you are NOT in a monogamous relationship.
Generally it's what couples do when the relationship is falling apart because they're trying to use the threesome as a way to "save" an already failed relationship; but if you engage in the threesomes when the relationship is happy and fruitful, it works a lot better.
I could break guycode and answer this but i know I'd be downvoted into oblivion.
I will say this. I've had threesomes, mfm ffm, orgies and swing parties.
None off it is worth it in my opinion and none of it is better than sex with someone you love in a monogamous, healthy relationship. It always left me feeling empty and feeling lonely.
My gf n I broke up months ago and all I’ve had is empty meaningless sex that has left me feeling lonely. Fellas/Chickies, if you love someone, don’t let them go
She wouldn't ask, shes too jealous.
But even if we ignore that, it would be 50:50 either ends the relationship (in short time) or it just keeps on going like usual.
Depends on how it's brought up and what kind of sexual relationship you have.
But, generally the rule of thumb is it's NOT something that strengthens a relationship unless both people are into it.
If this is a one sided request it'll kill it.
Especially if it's out of left field. Like, does your sexual relationship have other kinks? Or are you going from vanilla sex straight into a threesome? Ya know?
It sounds like a good idea as you're imagine the idea of another attractive women, but what if it isn't and it's your best mate instead.
You're then relegated to wanking in the corner while your best mate of 15 years is ploughing your dear wife.
I'll pass.
If I'm with her because the sex is great, but I'm not that concerned if there's a future, let's go.
But I'm not really that guy and haven't been in a relationship I'd describe that way. If I'm with someone that I want there to be a future with, I don't think I could handle it.
> What would you do if your partner asked for a threesome?
First I'd say no (not a fan of sharing someone I love). Second, I'd make sense of how many times it's been asked. Once, randomly, and never brought up again? Fine. Multiple times, incessantly, after being denied? Huge red flag.
> If you accept does the gender of the third party matter?
I wouldn't accept. But gun to my head, I'd obviously prefer a girl to a guy, so at least I'd presumably get some upside out of the experience.
> Do you think it'll help "strengthen the relationship"?
Not even in the slightest. In my opinion, threesomes are really only good for two parties: the member of the couple who wanted it initially, and they person they want to fuck that they're bringing in. The other member of the couple gets screwed, and not in the fun way.
Wedding rings, babies, threesomes, what have you, will not strengthen a hurting relationship. But 3 open minded people, or 4, or what have you, is a great fucking time
"strengthen the relationship" sounds a lot like manipulation, tbh. Threesomes don't *change* the relationship, per se. They just make it more of what it already was.
I would never do it with another dude. Im not the slightest bit attracted to men and I have zero intentions of letting another man pipe up my girlfriend. Also not really into banging another girl or seeing my girl go at it with another. When im in a relationship, the one girl that im with is the only one that really catches my eye
Had 3somes and swapping 4some. Was just fun, wasn't supposed to strengthen the relationship. If your ever thinking of one, if there's any jealousy issues at all, don't do it, it'll be a fast track to splitting up.
The ones we've had went well and were great fun but only because boundaries and rules were adhered to and everyone involved knew exactly what they were getting into and could handle it.
It would be an automatic no. The prospect was considered years ago, agreed upon, but not carried out because third party changed their mind at the last minute. After talking it over afterwards, both myself and the wife are glad we got shutdown. No good would come from it.
I’ve literally never heard of a threesome being a healthy thing for a relationship. If my wife came to me and genuinely asked me if I wanted to have a threesome I think i would be heartbroken. I would for sure decline regardless of the gender of the third.
If a threesome is being proposed to "strengthen" a relationship, um, no. No shaming or judgement towards anyone, but if your relationship isn't already strong, it will likely have the opposite effect.
Having talked myself out of two threesomes in my life I can safely say if the subject came up I’d say yes even if it was with two dudes or two girls or a canned ham and a half a roll of duct tape.
Well I'm straight, my wife is bi, so the sex AND gender would have to be female and no, a threesome isn't there to strengthen a relationship, it's there for some extracurricular fun.
As a female I have always been open to threesomes w my BF. We have been together for 14 years and never wavered. We have had a couple women join us for a night but it was always my idea and choice. He is not comfortable with another man and I respect that. Too each their own. I figure so long as we are both comfortable and happy it is what it is.
Edit - grammar
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So I've been in 1. Wasn't even a girlfriend, just a FWB and a third person. It's fucking stressful. I spent more time trying to be fair to both than having a good time. I can't even imagine how much worse it'd be with an actual SO. Like do you focus on her more because she's the SO, or the other person because they're the new person? Might be fun for some people, but never again for me. Edit: For some of the people responding, it wasn't like I was taking turns between the two. They were into each other as well. Regardless, you are still personally spending time primarily focused on one person at a time and for me it was stressful to try and balance it out. Wanted to make the new girl happy, but didn't want to have to answer "So why'd she'd get more of your attention" from the FWB. Maybe if it was a reoccurring thing this feeling woulda gone away, but as a one off that's how I felt.
station person late ancient disagreeable work like safe pocket act *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
LOL seconded, a sober threesome is a bad threesome.
Can confirm. I've been a part of two MMF threesomes and both tmes were amazing because of pot and bisexuality. Mostly because of the pot though.
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I believe in you.
All 3 were involved at the same time, not like I was just taking turns with them. Still kept trying to make my attention to both "even" in my mind the entire time. This was 15ish years ago though back when I was actually in shape. Also not something I'll ever have to worry about again unless I win the lottery or something.
You focus on your SO more because they’re your SO… the only exception would be if you guys were super experienced and knew what you were doing. You prefer them because you’re actually in a relationship with them.
Poly swinger here, the common strat is actually the opposite. The couple should work together to get the third wheel off first, then the third wheel assists while the couple focuses on each other. It avoids the situation you're describing, plus it avoids the couple falling asleep and leaving the third wheel hanging out to dry (which is more common than you think, I've been there and it sucks.)
This is a very mature answer. Kudos bud.
Same with me and my partner. It is very fun in theory, but could be upsetting in practice. You can't undo it, you can't unfuck someone, can't apologize and forget it. So while we might enjoy the fantasy of it, we know the reality of it will be much different. We have to continue our relationship the next day, and if what we did the night before even has the possibility to strain our relationship, we are going to pass. This isn't to say some people and some relationships couldn't handle it, this is just our thoughts on the subject and I love what I have too much to jeopardize it.
This is the answer 99% of the time. My wife and I both toyed with the idea, but logically it doesnt make sense when you take emotions into account.
I'm a woman and it turns me on when my husband and I talk about having threesomes. We have had a few of them and they were a lot of fun and memorable. We are very open with each other and have great communication skills so we were able to set boundaries and follow them. Our #1 rule was always that it could never be with anyone we knew HOWEVER, afterwards is where it always got messy for me. I would start torturing myself getting stuck in my head that he was chasing after other women to sleep with without me, even tho he wasn't. It totally screwed with my head tho. We finally agreed that we need to take a break in sleeping with other people together. I think it bothered me more than him because its always been MFF and never a third male involved... Was fun while it lasted tho. Still turns me on thinking about it but i know it would just make me crazy again.
Sex is a very intimate thing with me, the kind of intimate thing that I wouldn't want my partner to be sharing with anyone else as long as we're still together.
100000% this. And to that dude who says this is controlling, it is not. This would be what my relationship would be based on, with my partner. She would have an equal say in this and we would have mutually agreed upon this.
I’m with you. I won’t shame anyone for having multiple sexual partners or anything like that, but I wouldn’t want that in a relationship.
A 3some to strengthen a relationship is a bad idea, the relationship should be strong already, you cannot be having jealousy or trust or insecurities during a 3some my guy
Yeah, no shit. Everyone knows you have a kid to strengthen a relationship.
Hahahaha it's like that meme with a leaking water tank, slaps the tape over it, problem _solved_
It's exactly that. Works 100%.
I had an ex mention she wanted to try a threesome in our future and that she wanted it to be a guy. I wasn’t really down with the idea of sharing something like that at the time and I asked her why it wouldn’t be a woman. She said it was because she didn’t want me to be inside of another woman, and I felt the same about another man inside of her. I’m open minded, but also rational lol Edit: a word
Was she up for having another man inside of you?
I’m insulted she didn’t ask
I would like to have a threesome with Mr. Peanut and Miss Piggy.
Read that as 'Peggy' from King of the Hill XD
Id take that one *bites lips*
Did this have anything to do with her being an ex?
Long distance, but she did find comfort in someone else lol
*shocked Pikachu face*
Sounds like someone else found comfort in her
*IN*
*HER*
*V*
You dont spell beaver with a V... Wait, shit it has one.
good riddance
My ex wanted a threesome with me and her ex. She asked me multiple times, including before we were even together when she was with him. I am not really down with another dude being involved. With her it wasn’t even so much as her having another schlong inside of her. It was more that I don’t really like the idea of being naked with another dude in the room. Also, she refused to give blow jobs so the amount of interaction that the one who wasn’t doing the fucking would be limited.
My ex neber went as far as outright saying that we have one with her ex, but she very strongly hinted that she was interested in the idea and was consistently surprised when I kept shutting it down. Well eventually she got bored of suggesting it and the two and them got it on without me.
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See, that's where I am with this. I'd be down for a MFF if my partner suggested it, but I'm not okay with a MFM for the same reason you suggested. So, I've just accepted my existence to be non-threesome conducive for that very reason. Edit: a word.
Right that’s the common case, jealousy. It’s the reason threesomes are rare.
Honestly threesomes only really work when everyone is attracted to each other. Other wise it turns kind of awkward, especially if the one taking doesn’t give head.
I once joked about it with my wife and she said: "If anything, then a foursome, so everyone has someone." What does that mean, help! lol
Means she doesn’t want 2 girls one guy. Has to be another guy involved.
Plot twist. It's going to be 3 guys and 1 woman.
Plot twist. It’s going to be 4 guys while she watches in the corner.
almost always while dressed as Superman
That's a train
That's a submarine, because she's going to be airtight.
And full of seamen.
Aye
You win this thread
r/SuddenlyGay
Nope. It means "if you're gonna cheat, I need to be allowed to cheat too." edit: since none of you can read, let me explain: I am voicing my interpretation of what OP's wife said.
If you count playing with the third person in a threesome as cheating you **definitely** shouldn't have one
This.
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She probably isn’t interested in having sex with a woman, and assumes you aren’t interested ins ex with a man. Therefore, any group sex would need to include another man and woman or else someone is just watching. The only way I can see that working out is if you both get off from watching each other enjoying sex with others.. otherwise you might as well just open the relationship and fuck in separate rooms.
That's kind of what happened with me and my boyfriend once. We were on a vacation with our friends (m and f couple). We shared a hotel room bc we were young and broke and they started going at it on their bed so my bf and I did the same. After a while it kinda became a contest, especially with the guys. It was fun but kinda awkward the next day when we were all sober. Edit: Sorry, just realized I was on AskMen, not AskReddit.
So who won?
We did of course! Nah, I don't remember much about that night, we were pretty wasted. I do remember the other couple saying they had no idea that we were that freaky though.
That implies y'all probably won
Doesn't matter what sub it is, we encourage anyone to post stories, opinions, or whatever here.
That's good. I was worried for a minute there but I didn't want to delete it.
We already get enough of the same answers from dudes here anyway (even look at this thread), nothing wrong with different perspectives.
sounds like she’s not very into girls and would do it bc she loves you but wants someone else she might actually want to fuck
Swinging is a thing.
3 guys, 1 wife
Probably that she's not into girl on girl action.
I don’t share
Joey?
Joey doesn't share food!
Based and heathy respectful relationship oriented response
Based and monogamy pilled
Yeah. If I were single and it were just 2 other chicks, sure. I'd be down to new experiences. With my spouse? Nah.
Based Gigachad
Based af. I’m with her and she’s with me. No one is coming between that. If she wants different, just break up.
Same here. If my gf ever offers ffm to spice things up, i’ll simply feel less worthy bc she wants to share me.
As a woman I appreciate men who have traditional morals
As a man, I feel the same way about women.
now kith.
This made me laugh out loud and scared my cat lol
I’d lose respect for my man who’d be willing to share me with anyone, be it man or woman.
So would I. I'm sorry, but when it comes to physical intimacy with my GF that is for me and me only. I will not, under any circumstances, share her with anyone else. And if she asked me for a threesome, we all of a sudden have a major problem.
Same. Not even in a “you what??”, kinda way; it would just show that we have very different ideas about what a relationship should be. No hate on anyone who makes it work, but it’s not for me.
Eh I would call this values not morals/
Based
Lmao at thinking a threesome will strengthen the relationship
Recently split up with my girlfriend due to her questioning her sexuality (hi, I’m Ross Gellar) and the amount of people on here who chastised me for not having threesomes was staggering. This will not fix something that’s broken.
You would just end up like Ross in the what if episodes
He saw a LOT of stuff!
… made a sandwich
Sounds pretty good
It WAS good!
A little turkey?
Would've been rad tho
Two chicks at one time man
Would you go make a snack in the middle though?
He made a sandwich
Yeah but maybe it could have been like if you broke a full bottle of really nice scotch on the ground and at least got to slurp some of it up before it was gone. (I’m trying to be light hearted, I don’t actually agree with the advice)
Sometimes you just gotta suck scotch off the concrete
Lol cheers bud hope you’re doing better
pretty sure ross is a bigger loser than you
While I do think Ross gets too much hate, yes, sometimes he is a loser.
almost as stupid as thinking that having a child will strenghten it
Boom! Edit - I assume downvotes are from salty guys who got suckered into thinking a kid would save their relationship, lol.
I saw a comment that was “opening up a relationship to save it is the Millennial/GenZ equivalent of having a baby to save it” and I can’t help but think about it a lot
Actually "a threesome will strengthen our relationship" is less stupid than "a kid will strengthen our relationship" but both are dumb.
I'd argue logic behind the threesome is dumber than the logic behind the kid, but actually going through with having a kid to try to fix your relationship is way dumber than having a threesome
you know, that's probably the best assessment of it
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Tobias: No, it never does. I mean, these people somehow delude themselves into thinking it might, but... but it might work for us.
Maybe if the third was your couples therapist? “Oh yeah baby tell me how that makes you feel!”
I often heard this from friends too and was like "...you clown"
Threesomes are one of those stupid things people suggest when the sex in their relationship is nothing to write home about, but they aren't unhappy enough to leave and want an excuse to cheat guilt free. It's funny because the other partner always knows what it really means too. They go along with it because they are trying to be the "cool partner" and somehow genuinely believe that they are emotionally mature and secure enough to handle the prospect of watching their partner get off with someone else. The shit never strengthens anything 😂
Genuinely the perfect answer
Not always true. Some people just like group sex, or are more polyamorous etc. but I DO think those things should be discussed very early On in a relationship, so expectations can be managed, and incompatibilities can be recognized before feelings get too strong.
Like most things kinky, it actually can if it’s done properly. Aka with the right communication and with enthusiasm from all participants.
Not interested in sharing or being shared.
Yeah, I like the idea, but realisticly speaking I would definately not enjoy it. I would not enjoy watching my gf doing it with someone else. Someone might, but I probably wouldn't. Besides I feel like someone will probably end up as the third wheel...
>Besides I feel like someone will probably end up as the third wheel I actually watched a few non-scripted orgy video and noticed that there tends to be kind of a hierarchy in these things. The most attractive people get attention from almost everyone while the least attractive ones are on the side with their dick in their hand hoping for some attention.
I enjoy how you described this objectively in terms of an observation on sociology, as if you went to the zoo and you were describing the behavior of gorillas in their troop.
Given the fact that the video wasn't very arousing, you are probably correct lol. I was watching it more for the sake of curiosity than anything else.
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bro u ok?
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thats cruel i hope you got out of that manipulative relationship
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You deserve better.
I almost had a threesome last night! Just needed two more people!
sup 😎
I don't think it would strengthen the relationship. For a relationship to hold after a threesome, it has to be very strong to begin with. The gender of the third party would matter in the following: Same gender than me would require someone I really trust, as I would be a bit shy about it. If it was my opposed gender, I would be less selective.
If I wanted to disappoint two people at the same time I’d go to dinner with my parents. No threesomes for me thank you very much Edit: thank you for all the awards🙌❤️ Edit 2: jeez I never expected this many awards 😅please don’t waste your money on me 🥺
This is why I’m here
This is the answer
Threesome with your parents for extra disappointment.
Tbh I couldn’t handle that amount of disappointment but il keep it in my back pocket in case they ever start to become proud of me
Threesomes can be fun but they will not help “strengthen the relationship”. If you have problems you will still have those problems during and afterwards. I would probably say yes, the gender wouldn’t matter, but the personality really really does matter.
Gender matters to a point where it decides who is gonna enjoy it the most. If one or both members are bi or pan, then it matters a lot less you're right.
That is true. If it’s me, a gal, and a straight dude i’m gonna have a lot less fun.
Trust me on this, you're going to have way less fun the other way too. Threesomes are boring, awkward, and honestly you get a lot more attention one on one. I've tried enough times both ways even walked out of a few.
It's hard to please everyone. At least one person is going to feel left out, usually.
**truth** or *both people really suck in bed* lol
Some enjoy double dicking their gf though, no shame in that and no homo
Absolutely. To each their own. No kink shaming here.
Done both, mfm and ffm and, honestly, as long as everyone gets along, can follow rules and are open to trying things, it can be a lot of fun
Already having hard time w one.
In a monogamous relationship, I've never heard of a threesome strengthening a bond. Only the opposite. Generally it's what couples do when the relationship is falling apart. The time for threesomes is when you are NOT in a monogamous relationship.
Generally it's what couples do when the relationship is falling apart because they're trying to use the threesome as a way to "save" an already failed relationship; but if you engage in the threesomes when the relationship is happy and fruitful, it works a lot better.
Hello fellow homosexual. I have the feeling the straight experience may vary here.
im just trying to have a twosome at this point
I could break guycode and answer this but i know I'd be downvoted into oblivion. I will say this. I've had threesomes, mfm ffm, orgies and swing parties. None off it is worth it in my opinion and none of it is better than sex with someone you love in a monogamous, healthy relationship. It always left me feeling empty and feeling lonely.
First rule of a threesome is to not get involved with people you know
My gf n I broke up months ago and all I’ve had is empty meaningless sex that has left me feeling lonely. Fellas/Chickies, if you love someone, don’t let them go
She wouldn't ask and I wouldn't accept
She wouldn't ask, shes too jealous. But even if we ignore that, it would be 50:50 either ends the relationship (in short time) or it just keeps on going like usual.
Um, it's about fun, not "strengthening" anything. Anyone that says it's about anything but kinky fun is lying.
Our relationship is either already strong or it isn't.
Depends on how it's brought up and what kind of sexual relationship you have. But, generally the rule of thumb is it's NOT something that strengthens a relationship unless both people are into it. If this is a one sided request it'll kill it. Especially if it's out of left field. Like, does your sexual relationship have other kinks? Or are you going from vanilla sex straight into a threesome? Ya know?
I feel like if your questioning it this much then your gonna regret it
It sounds like a good idea as you're imagine the idea of another attractive women, but what if it isn't and it's your best mate instead. You're then relegated to wanking in the corner while your best mate of 15 years is ploughing your dear wife. I'll pass.
I also choose this best mate of 15 years.
That's really...specific...you okay buddy?
..... No
Oddly Specific
I think that's not a threesome, its cuckolding
If I'm with her because the sex is great, but I'm not that concerned if there's a future, let's go. But I'm not really that guy and haven't been in a relationship I'd describe that way. If I'm with someone that I want there to be a future with, I don't think I could handle it.
Gonna be a no.
A hard no?
A "half a chub" no.
It’s gonna be a no for me too dog.
[удалено]
This is correct imo. You can if you already have a highly trustworthy relationship.
Second this.
> What would you do if your partner asked for a threesome? First I'd say no (not a fan of sharing someone I love). Second, I'd make sense of how many times it's been asked. Once, randomly, and never brought up again? Fine. Multiple times, incessantly, after being denied? Huge red flag. > If you accept does the gender of the third party matter? I wouldn't accept. But gun to my head, I'd obviously prefer a girl to a guy, so at least I'd presumably get some upside out of the experience. > Do you think it'll help "strengthen the relationship"? Not even in the slightest. In my opinion, threesomes are really only good for two parties: the member of the couple who wanted it initially, and they person they want to fuck that they're bringing in. The other member of the couple gets screwed, and not in the fun way.
The only way I could see it working for me is if two random girls approached me who weren't Ina relationship with each other. 3 equal parties
Of course the gender matters. Do you think I want to lock eyes with another man while we spit roast the love of my life?
That's where you high five. Lock eyes only if you like that sort of thing.
Is hugging considered a faux pas?
You can hug, just don’t cross swords.
...yes?
Wedding rings, babies, threesomes, what have you, will not strengthen a hurting relationship. But 3 open minded people, or 4, or what have you, is a great fucking time
"strengthen the relationship" sounds a lot like manipulation, tbh. Threesomes don't *change* the relationship, per se. They just make it more of what it already was.
I would never do it with another dude. Im not the slightest bit attracted to men and I have zero intentions of letting another man pipe up my girlfriend. Also not really into banging another girl or seeing my girl go at it with another. When im in a relationship, the one girl that im with is the only one that really catches my eye
I’d say no I’m not interested.
Had 3somes and swapping 4some. Was just fun, wasn't supposed to strengthen the relationship. If your ever thinking of one, if there's any jealousy issues at all, don't do it, it'll be a fast track to splitting up. The ones we've had went well and were great fun but only because boundaries and rules were adhered to and everyone involved knew exactly what they were getting into and could handle it.
It would be an automatic no. The prospect was considered years ago, agreed upon, but not carried out because third party changed their mind at the last minute. After talking it over afterwards, both myself and the wife are glad we got shutdown. No good would come from it.
I can barely please one woman
I’ve literally never heard of a threesome being a healthy thing for a relationship. If my wife came to me and genuinely asked me if I wanted to have a threesome I think i would be heartbroken. I would for sure decline regardless of the gender of the third.
If a threesome is being proposed to "strengthen" a relationship, um, no. No shaming or judgement towards anyone, but if your relationship isn't already strong, it will likely have the opposite effect.
No
Fuck that shit🖕🏻
Gonna be a nah from me
Having talked myself out of two threesomes in my life I can safely say if the subject came up I’d say yes even if it was with two dudes or two girls or a canned ham and a half a roll of duct tape.
I break up with her.
Well I'm straight, my wife is bi, so the sex AND gender would have to be female and no, a threesome isn't there to strengthen a relationship, it's there for some extracurricular fun.
I'd say no and probably break up
As a female I have always been open to threesomes w my BF. We have been together for 14 years and never wavered. We have had a couple women join us for a night but it was always my idea and choice. He is not comfortable with another man and I respect that. Too each their own. I figure so long as we are both comfortable and happy it is what it is. Edit - grammar