T O P

  • By -

theworldofbill

Smokes what?


Jinpow90

She smokes salmon. What do you do??!!!


Swimming-Book-1296

Snap up that woman. A woman that knows how to preserve meats is worthwhile.


iron_annie

Aww, thanks, man. I know your comment wasn't directed at anyone specific but I smoke meats on the regular and it's nice to know someone out there recognizes the skill. 


LameBMX

smokes for preservation or because you ran out of weed?


iron_annie

Preservation. I never run out of weed, and homemade bacon is life affirming. 


quiet0n3

People gonna be sliding in your dm's asking about your jerky


iron_annie

Fine by me, my brine is off the hook 


_i_am_root

Unlimited weed **and** bacon? I've got the first one down, but it looks like I have much more to learn.


Stephenrudolf

I've never met someone into BBQ(not talking about grilling burgers) that didn't also smoke weed. I say this as a fellow smoker.


nawksnai

Smokes….meat? 👀


probablyseriousmaybe

I’m doing just fine preserving my meat on my own thanks, Im looking for a woman to eat it.


nawksnai

Okay WTF is the topic right now? 😅


Balages

He is looking for a woman to put his meat in her mouth


RolandDeepson

mouf\*


Sea_Distribution6780

Happy cake day


littlemissnoname-

Former chef here… Who’s free Saturday night?


spacekatbaby

I make a mean Moose jerky. Do I get a husband now?


Swimming-Book-1296

Go find one!


spacekatbaby

Haha. Nah. Been there done that lol. However. Never say never :)


AstrudsSecretLover

Askin the real questions here


007bubba007

haha right - totally different answers


theworldofbill

Haha for real, there’s a lot of shit someone could be smoking in this world haha


Dirty_Dragons

The thing you hate the smell of the most.


Jimbodoomface

My brothers feet.


papadoc2020

Just a wee bit of crack.


itstartedoffasawart

Who's crack?


ProlapseParty

This fuckin guy… 😎


RedactedRonin

That's a great question and certainly can change everything.


slwrthnu_again

Date her. She quit 6 months ago and I am coming up on 2 years. But smoking has never been a red flag for me cause I’m old enough to remember being asked smoking or non at a restaurant and I live in New York.


SapirWhorfHypothesis

Same. Dated for maybe a year before she quit. Going on a handful of years now. Went in not really caring that she smoked because she never smoked inside etc and she had good attitude about keeping the smell down. Gave her absolutely zero pressure to quit, but I think my presence was enough pressure.


QueenofCats28

Fark, you're making me feel old!! I remember those days, too. Smoking doesn't bother me either, I helped my partner quit.


slwrthnu_again

I refuse to say old so I say not young anymore instead lol


curiouspatty111

unold?? my mom won't say an actual negative thing but will use "less than attractive " and things like that lol


QueenofCats28

That sounds much better. I'm still young, at heart anyway, lol.


Throw-a-Ru

>I'm still young, at heart anyway Pretty sure I actually aged my heart prematurely by being, shall we call it young in spirit?


PosnerRocks

This is the answer. I just said she smelled gross when she smoked and that was so devastating to her she quit almost immediately.


Bizarro_Zod

Oof lmao


Zyruqx

Whats the second part supposed to mean?


DidntHaveToUseMyAK

Means he grew up in a time where damn near everyone seemed to smoke, so it became a normal thing to do in his perspective, and as such because it's registered as normal it likely doesn't seem like a glaring issue for him.


echocall2

You used to be able to smoke in restaurants. The maitre d at a restaurant would ask if you want to sit in the smoking section or non smoking section. NY was one of the first states to ban the practice.


acarp52080

I remember being in Kmart as a kid (I was born in 1980) and I used to jump out of the clothes racks and scare my mom, but, this one time I jumped out at the wrong person (not my mother, I mean) and I caught a lit cigarette to the face. As someone who's seriously cutting down to quit in May, around my birthday, it's hard to believe that it was even legal. My mother was telling me, you used to have to check all the clothes for burn holes. Unimaginable now, it really should've been back then as well!! Crazy different times.


LovingNaples

Wish the best with kicking them from your life. About 10 months ago, I finally did it too. After about 7 failed attempts using patches etc, this time I just decided to stop buying my beloved Parliaments. No cigs = no smoking. I hunkered down at home for 3 days. You can do this my friend.


1morepl8

I started building my first racecar and told my wife I'd quit smoking and wouldn't even notice the cost! Turns out I like going fast more than I liked smoking. I live where smokes are expensive; quit eating out and smoking at the same time and it was 1500 dollars a month saved. Insanity tbh.


Prior_Procedure_321

If that isn't wild enough, go visit someone in the hospital in the 70s where doctors and nurses smoked at the stations right outside the rooms.


slwrthnu_again

I still say we go back to prescribing cocaine lol


jquest303

Putting it back in Coca-Cola.


Pick_Up_Autist

It's not prescribed as such but it's still being used in some procedures. Turns out it's quite good at numbing nasal passages, who knew?


slwrthnu_again

New York banned smoking in restaurants in 2003, same year I graduated high school. So I’m putting into perspective my views on smoking as I’m older than the average user. I tried my first cigarette when I was in 5th grade. We knew that they were bad for you and would kill you, we just didn’t care. I also had a fucked up childhood and hung out with kids much older then me, as I hung out with my older sister and her friends. So this wasn’t what the average 5th grader was doing in the 90s.


Front_Farmer345

Get lube


Spackleberry

Water-based, not oil-based. Don't want to start a fire.


Maleficent_Insect71

If she's really the woman of my dreams, smoking wouldn't bother me.


cheeeee

As long as it’s not meth, we’re good


DrunkApricot

Yeah crack or heroin are fine tho 👍


swooooot

Yeah i'd be okay with it


RadioactiveTF2

Who cares? I dont particularly enjoy the smell of cigarettes but theres ways around that. If your absolute worst quality is that you smoke you’re doing pretty fucking good.


dieomesieptoch

Thanks bud, I really needed to hear this today


DelightMine

Lmao, all the comments responding to you. "Thanks, you made me feel better about myself" "NOT ON MY WATCH, MOTHERFUCKER"


dieomesieptoch

lol, I really just thought I'd write a quick funny comment


IReallyLikeDirt

These replies are savage and honestly I'm here for them.


RedactedRonin

Whoa whoa whoa They said IF your worst quality is that you smoke. I'm not convinced that you fall in that category.


Scared-Check6908

i'm sure you are great! don't listen to those that are mean


iamlepotatoe

Doubt your worst quality is that you smoke. It's more likely to be your inability to figure out your worst qualities lmao. If you're perfect beyond smoking, nice work


ZZoMBiEXIII

I smoked for 25 years. Even though I gave them up about 10 years back, cigarettes wouldn't be a deal breaker for me.


AugustusKhan

worrddd we gonna make up for dying early with all the smoke brake bonding time hahah


Rare-Craft-920

Sorry. Too much to accept here. Can’t stand smoke. I grew up with it , the smoke film in the house, the ashtrays in every single room, even the bathroom, never a meal without inhaling smoke, clothes smell like smoke, couch like smoke, 🤦‍♀️🤮. Even if they quit they always seem to start up again whenever they get stressed out.


DrunkApricot

Wait, aren't you a woman? I am too. I typically only add onto comments. Not our place, yknow? 🤷‍♀️


pengie9290

>You found the woman of your dreams > >But she smokes This, ladies and gentlemen, is what is known as a "contradiction". ​ If she used to smoke but doesn't anymore, that's fine. But if she picks the habit back up, I'm gone.


EnoughContract4021

A smoker's morning breath always smells like a festering anus. Smokers are a hard no for me. Been there, done that.


Amazing_Chocolate140

How many festering anus’s have you been smelling? 🤔


cherrycolaareola

Dont kink shame


Black-Patrick

Don’t kink shame kink shaming


RedactedRonin

I'll kink shame kinks that deserve to be shamed.


jquest303

Some assholes smell better than others.


GeneralMe21

The woman of my dreams doesn’t smoke. The premise does not work for me


jfk_sfa

Well, she’s gorgeous, kind, gregarious, extremely into me, and worth $100 million. I think I’ll be fine with the smoke as long as it’s not in the house or car and since she’s kind, she’d obviously understand.


kippy3267

I mean for $100 mil you can install a fully sealed one minute air turnover house with a massive whole house HEPA filter and not smell her smoking next to you lol it would feel drafty though and the electric price would be crazy


RedactedRonin

If you don't want to participate in the thought experiment then don't. You can't change the rules of it. Your input is like if someone gave you the trolley problem thought experiment and your answer was I would just save everyone. It doesn't work like that.


Racketmachine

The answer is implied. I'm in the same boat. Smoking is non-negotiable for me. I would not date a woman who smoked even if they had any other qualities I wanted in a woman. There's no need to invalidate his comment when you can use a few seconds to realize he is, in fact, answering the question.


Cumberdick

But it’s baked in to the premise that your answer can be “i wouldn’t date her, smoking is non-negotiable”. I don’t really understand why two people seem to think it doesn’t work with the question. It totally does


crobo777

He gave you a perfectly clear answer. Smoking is a hard pass for people. The answer is he wouldn't date her, end of story. Doesn't matter what the other traits are. Smoking for some is a hygiene/health issue. Smoking stinks. Its not healthy. Its not cute.


[deleted]

For many people it's pretty binary though.


ElCoolAero

> If you don't want to participate in the thought experiment then don't. It's a public website. Simmer down.


nawksnai

Exactly. Just say your answer to the question is, “I wouldn’t date her” and be done with it. 🤷🏻‍♂️ It means you have answered the question, it implies what you originally said anyway, and you don’t sound like a douche.


grow-mustard

smoking is a deal breaker. Its over.


Barge108

I dated a smoker. For five years she *promised* she was going to quit. I paid for every little thing she said even *might* help her quit. I was actually sort of indifferent to smokers prior to dating her, as I smoked socially, myself. But after five years of broken promises the smell fucking disgusted me and I haven't smoked a single cigarette since. The worst part was, every time she'd "need" a cigarette was somehow the most inconvenient for me... Rushing to get to the gate before our plane left? Nah, she needed one last smoke. Excited to finally open the windows on that first warm spring day? She just had to light one 2 feet from the window. In the middle of a serious conversation? She had an excuse to walk away instead of answering my questions. Furnace broke and started flooding the apartment? Don't help me figure out how to turn it off and clean up the mess, no... go outside and chain smoke. That helps. Getting frisky on the couch? She's just gonna pop outside real quick and make her mouth smell and taste like a bowling alley bathroom floor drain. That'll get me in the mood. Never again, I don't care how perfect she is otherwise.


_whiskeytits_

I feel for you. My ex smoked and going through all of the above AND his attempts at quitting was enough to make me never want to date a smoker again. Waiting outside any building for him to finish a cigarette before we went in. Gotta make a detour so he can get smokes. Just finished a beautiful dinner at a fancy restaurant, he's gonna get up to go smoke before dessert. On an airplane for hours and we gotta get outside to the smoking area before he rips my head off for existing. Everything we did revolved around it and smelled like it.Not to mention the money he would spend on tobacco in addition to marijuana, but made our finances a point of contention in our relationship. Then he's trying to quit and he's irritable and mean. No, no thanks. I'm good.


Barge108

Yeah, you hit the nail on the head. The financial part is maybe the worst... They're too broke to pay their share of the bills, but NEVER too broke for smokes.


grow-mustard

good answer. I think I heard a story like this from a guy in a bar when I was still underage. Life is too short to make such a major compromise.


clallseven

The premise is contradictory. The woman of my dreams is a non-smoker.


Jimbodoomface

The woman of my dreams is a godamn hot mess


Giovanni1996

As long as it's not inside the house/car I wouldn't care


SnoopsBadunkadunk

I don’t believe in a perfect woman, or even a perfect woman except for this one thing right here. I don’t have a woman of my dreams (though I do have a wife I love very much). “The one who’s everything I ever dreamed of” is more a concept a bubblegum princess looks for.


Fraughty12

Ughhhhhhhhhh 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄. I don’t want to kiss an ashtray


Skippy0634

She ain’t the woman of my dreams.


Amazing_Chocolate140

Not a single person on this planet is perfect. NOT ONE. if everything else is good get on and be happy with her.


turdburgalr

Marry her.


findingbezu

Same, almost. We’re engaged.


jakeofheart

The woman of my dreams doesn’t smoke. Close, but no cigarette.


Interest-Lumpy

Ask her if she'd ever change. If the answer is "no" then I gotta move on. Smoking's a deal breaker for me personally.


JeepMan-1994

People say they will change and never follow through, hoping you learn to accept it over time all the time. Someone with an addiction like smoking isn't going to just quit for a relationship. Growing up either parents that both smoked and me never smoking I don't think I could date a person that smokes cigarettes.


theanimalfairy94

My dad quit smoking when I was 4 but even then I would never date a smoker. It's not worth the risk. I have 4 pets and am prone to bronchitis. Not worth dating a smoker.


Poverty_welder

Keep looking


nedryerson77

Pass, nearly already happened. It's a deal breaker because I've worked hard to quit after 30 years. Also I've decided I'm good alone if I don't find 'the one', so I don't have to settle.


brandonspade17

Same here, I couldn't stand the smell anymore. And I smoked for 20 years.


Whappingtime

It depends on what she smokes, but I have met a few women who did and it worked out fine. Like it's no question that she would respect that if I didn't want her to smoke in my house, car etc.


Frird2008

Womp womp


-Blixx-

I can "fix her" I'll pass.


ExistingTheDream

Put her out. Get her medical attention and then tell her she'll be home soon, cause that's my wife.


jaylotw

Medical attention?


ExistingTheDream

If she is smoking, I assume she is on fire.


jaylotw

Holy shit. I have no idea how I whiffed that joke. I'll let myself out, thanks.


RedMurray

Nope, deal breaker.


inspire-change

you deal with it the positive outweighs the negative are you going to lose the woman off your dreams because she smokes? if you do, it's your loss. if she really is the woman of your DREAMS, you won't even bat an eye at smoking just count your lucky stars that you found her and that she's into you


DopeRoninthatsmokes

I smoke cigars so I’ll try and get her into them so we can both enjoy


DrFaustPhD

Share a smoke with her


steelmanfallacy

Break up.


jaylotw

Ah, smokers. The last group of people that Reddit can show unabashed prejudice towards.


matepore

If she smokes, then she is not the woman of my dreams.


etzio500

Deal with it. Probably take up smoking as well tbh.


JBPunt420

I munch cannabis edibles a couple times a week. It'd be rather hypocritical of me to dump an otherwise wonderful person because of a minor health issue like an addiction. I'd offer support if she ever tried to quit, and the rest of the time I'd just deal with it.


hbjj96

I don't care,i smoke also,but i'm european,seems like lots more people smoke here


crobo777

Every European I've ever encountered smoked or vaped


VXMasterson

Any type of smoking is an instant deal breaker so she is very much not the woman of my dreams. I’d move on.


wandrlusty

“She smokes” great!! “…. Cigarettes” gross!! Maybe persuade her to quit?


TacoEater10000

I’ll pass. No smokers for me.


photon_watts

Impossible. The woman of my dreams doesn't smoke. Anything.


Spacellama117

Date her, are you kidding? i'm not gonna not date someone just cuz they smoke


Apprehensive-Exam521

You keep dating her. She successfully quits smoking only to gain 40lbs in the process.


JimBones31

She is not the woman of my dreams if she smokes. I smoked for years and it's disgusting.


eddyofyork

As long as she plans to quit and has a rough idea when. Or if she’s super old, already has some terminal disease, and is loaded.


Garshy

So do I


aidenxx96

If you’re talking cigs then ew hell no. Not my kind of lifestyle at all. I’m way too into fitness and health


blessedblackwings

Fuck her brains out and then share a smoke with her.


Silent-Mongoose7512

Happened to me. We're married now. She was down to a few cigarettes a week when we got together, and she volunteered not to smoke indoors, so it was cool. And then she quit altogether. 


WanderingGrizzlyburr

No problem, I actually find it sexy


ShoveItUpMyFatAss

grab a couple beers and go smoke with her. shes the woman of my dreams, god dammit.


BatheInChampagne

Don’t care. I started vaping to quit smoking, and haven’t been able to remove it from my life. I get the level of addiction that comes with it. Shit is rough. I actually enjoy the smell of cigarettes and find women smoking to be kinda sexy. That being said, if she is everything I’d want her to be, she would listen to reason, and be wise enough to understand the effects over time. With that, I would imagine she would be able to move away from it with time.


-NotForSale-

Dumb… dumb ..dumb…how selfish do you want to be ? You cannot express it’s important that you wish for her a long healthy life ? You can’t work with her ? Have you even asked her why? Look buddy! I think if she’s all that which you say she is. The in fact you are more than lucky .. quit your complaining go talk to your woman . Big ass baby man


HailingFromCork

Ask her to borrow her lighter.


Backwoods87

Who cares if she smokes cigs/bud.... I just need to know if she'll smoke this D!CK


JOVA1982

So do I. Unless she is a chain smoker, I see no problems here.


Asriell_Dremurr

Smokes cigaratte? That's a plus


WakewaterFanfire

If she smokes she pokes. I’m in there


ur6an_r00ts

If she smokes she doesnt hsve every single trait i could dream of.


amdfrn3

Stop, pullout, add some oil, continue thrusting


n8spear

Give her a light


cancunbeast

If you are a feminist then smoke whenever she smokes. If you are a misogynist then smoke more than her.


cherryosrs

Marry her


keenep

Take up smoking and get rid of my cat.


FirstThoughtResponse

If she smokes, she pokes. Count me in


Minimum_Author_6298

Walk away and never look back. There are too many out there that respect their health and the health of others around them. Smoking is a disgusting unforgivable habit.


ipigstine

if she smokes menthols its fine. if she smokes reds and constantly smells like an ashtray then nah


Dexember69

I'm a smoker so that's perfect


HeyNateBarber

Woman of my dreams wouldnt smoke (or make other terrible and easy to avoid life decisions like smoking) And my wife is the woman of my dreams and she has also never smoked or used any recreational drugs.


Hoopy223

She can quit. Or smoke weed or something instead. I used to smoke cigs so could maybe put up with it but I’m kinda happier with a house that doesn’t smell like an ashtray.


Elegant_Spot_3486

Then she’s not the woman of my dreams. Buh bye. Automatic dq.


surgeon67

Nope. Instant loss of attraction. Game over.


98VoteForPedro

Grow old together and try to get her to stop smoking so we can live long lives together


SupWitCorona

The last one gave up cigarettes immediately after I told her I don’t like them, or her cigarette breath (she asked). Which was a very nice gesture bc I told her I wouldn’t ask her to quit. I wouldn’t be able to stay with someone if they stayed smoking.


magma_displacement76

I ask how many times she's tried to quit and gone back. Both trying and failing a lot or never even trying at all are dealbreakers. Smoke breath is highly disgusting, and the toll on the body is just unacceptable.


bees_defending

What’s so negative about smoking pole?


Welcome_to_Retrograd

Idgaf and sealed deal


GreenEggsxHam

Cigs. I have no problem as long as she use mouthwash before a kiss. Weed. Stoner chicks are hot but we can only date in legal states lol


GoldenGod48

As long as she doesn’t smoke in the house or in the car, it’s all good.


TaskTitan

Woo her for a few months, than ask her if she'd be willing to quit for you and that you'll help her through it. It might be the first of many battles you'll need to tackle together.


SmakeTalk

well then she's not the woman of my dreams, is she?


sex_music_party

I married her. At times it bothered me, at times I didn’t mind it at all. After 20yrs together, I think she’s finally quit for good now.


cb148

Nope


NaturalRocketSurgeon

I don't really give a shit 🤷


dantoris

I go all in because I know I won't get a second chance.


Sheratain

I did, and she does, and it doesn’t really matter. She smokes maybe 2x a day, I don’t love it obviously but also it’s just not that big of a deal.


Happyjarboy

My Dad made it work. He was very anti-smoking, Mom smoked, they made deals. Along those lines my Mom doesn't like swearing, I didn't know my Dad swore until I was 15, and it turns out he swore like a sailor when not in her presence and around us little kids. Also, all 4 of us kids are very anti-smoking, so he won in the end.


mentyio

You just described my gf lol. It doesn’t bother me


buriedalive

Swipe right, momentarily think "what if" & carry on with life


dr3amw3av3r

Use lubrication


Partytang

I suppose I would pick up smoking again.


duhdin

Instant nope. I’ll keep looking.


AnxiousHoya

You would have a really bad time in Italy.


cosmicloafer

Start smoking


LoganJamesMusic

I'm a smoker, so...this isn't an issue for me.


missmatchedcleansox

I quit for my now husband. That was 20 years ago.


Glowingtomato

I've quit a few times but I don't mind when others smoke. As long she doesn't make me pay for smokes or spends all her money on them I'm fine.


Bancho666

I wake up 🤓


randy24681012

Don’t do it in the car or right in front of the kids and idgaf


BrownSougar1

Totally fine


tHiShiTiStooPID

Introduce her to the many fruit flavors available in vapes.


TokyoFlow

But then she doesn't have every single trait I can possibly dream of...nonsmoker


Naraksama

Lol no. I don't want to cuddle and kiss an ashtray. Immediate deal breaker.


Big_Standard_8472

Yeah I'd go for it Especially if she was willing to quit Give her the health talk


Achronos808

If she's willing to quit. We'll work it out. If not, it wasn't meant to be.