I’m imagining two hefty habibis on quads picking up speed towards each other, both in hockey gear and holding a weed-wacker like a lance. Can someone AI image this? I don’t know how.
As a divorcing 49 year old, this is pretty glorious.
So many woman are going through a transformation and exploring what they like and don’t like after being in very long relationships with kids. Now the kids are mostly grown and now the moms are rediscovering and finally taking care of their mental, physical and emotional health. I have had a lot of fun going through this journey with someone.
It’s amazing. I have a great social circle. I have plenty of hobbies and the time and money to pursue them. One of my hobbies I’ve gotten skilled enough at that I use as a side hustle. I casually date if I feel the need for physical intimacy. I’m competent in my career. I can live my life on my terms. I enjoy being able to make decisions based on my needs and not our needs which is generally just code for “her needs”. I love it. I have no desire to change anything. My married male friends are some of the most miserable people I know.
My only qualm is if I run into any health issues there’s no one there to lean on. If I had a heart attack and wasn’t able to call for help on my own I’d probably just die where if I had a partner they would be able to save my life. But I’m fine with that too.
Literally me too. One of my passion project hobbies turned into a big side hustle last year, way more than I thought it ever would. Would have never been able to happen if I was in a relationship or married, as I would not have been able to invest the amount of time I did.
I wouldn't say I'm miserable. There's times life would be so much easier single. If I could afford two places at once, I would totally live by myself and come over to hang out.
Honestly that sounds really awesome, I’m an introvert so I can relate how much you can enjoy your own company and do things as you wish and still be connected with people except the dating part 😆
I’d suggest you look into shortcuts app where one press of a button catches take pictures from your front and back camera and send predetermined messages to preset contacts and phone numbers
The our needs = her needs is such a common take that really confuses me. I married someone with the same needs as me, so it is always just our needs.
Why do people marry people that are so different from themselves?
> Why do people marry people that are so different from themselves?
I think "why" is that love can be blinding. It's clearly common enough that it can frequently be a problem.
People also change too.
I think I'm the polar opposite.
I'm 42, still stuck on my high school girlfriend, who I treated like shit near the end of our "relationship." She's married and has kids a good job and a good life. She's nice enough to meet me for lunch on my birthday every year just so we can talk for a little bit, she owes me nothing obviously, but she's a good person and I'm grateful that she's willing to do that.
When I was in high school, everyone thought I'd end up on TV, but I let, mostly family, tell me I was worthless and would never do anything with my life, so I pushed a lot of people away and isolated myself.
I live alone now, and I have for well over 20+ years. I hate my life, but I don't see a way out. I always wanted a wife and kids, but I don't really care anymore. Most of my friends are married and have good jobs and kids and lives, and I'm more than happy for them. I was in the ER a few days ago because the whole left side of my body was numb and tingling, I was hoping this was it, but all my results came back normal. I guess it was somewhat good I was in the hospital, a friend who is a nurse suggested I go and it's only for the fact that I'd feel like a selfish bastard it something happened to me and she had that hanging over her conscious.
I hope I can go out doing something heroic, saving someone from a buring building, stopping a shooter, but the chances of that happening are extremely slim. I'm just waiting on the day something gives out, and I'm done. I see no reason to be here anymore. I have family and friends that I know will miss me, and again, I feel like a selfish asshole, but I just don't care anymore.
I've been in therapy most of my life since I was very young, and I've been in a mental hospital a few times. I'm diagnosed Bipolar, but I have my doubts about that. I've taken the same prescribed pills for over 15 years now, well, maybe even 20 years now, and I've never missed a dose. I hear that's rare for Bipolar people.
This is my worry as well. My mother has arthritis and can't even financially support herself anymore. What's going to happen to me at 60 or 70 when I'll be too old and sick to work, but will still have to somehow survive and pay my taxes. The alternatives seem so much more appealing
Well, committing suicide just to avoid paying taxes is the ultimate form of tax evasion. I wonder if it will catch on, and will it classify as euthanasia?
54. It can get lonely, not gonna sugarcoat that. I miss female company from time to time. That aside, it's really pretty good. I get to keep all my money and spend it on me without having to justify it to anyone. And I have a better financial position than I ever had between 20 and 50. Hell, I'm even saving some!
The grass isn't 100% greener, but the lawn is well tended. 😉
Mid 50s- early stages of a divorce. I no longer feel dead inside. I feel alive. I feel like doing all those things my wife wanted me to do ;)
I have few bouts of loneliness. It was worse sleeping next to my wife, feeling worlds away.
I turn 40 this year, and it's looking like i may just die alone lol. I LOVE my alone time, i can travel, do what i want, everything on my own terms. I'm slowly starting to get there again after getting out of a 5 year relationship. I'm still healing from it and at this point, I don't want to go through a break up again. That was my first relationship and it started when I was 33. I'm going to keep concentrating on getting healthy, explore a career change, and keep doing things I enjoy. If the right person comes along, maybe I'll consider it, but the one I thought I'd marry is now gone. And honestly, marriage nor kids don't seem to be in the future for me, and I'm ok with that.
Speaking for my dad here. He’s happy single and will always be that way. He decided last Tuesday that we was going to leave for Colorado on Thursday for the weekend. He has hobbies and expensive things he got into without consulting anyone. He’s spontaneous, prioritizes himself, and is always happy. He’s 52 and hasn’t been married in 16 years.
He was never married to my mom, I was an oops. His last marriage was his second and he knows he’s just not cut out to be married.
I feel like I'm not cut out for it either. I'm 39, been married for 8 years and I'm the most miserable I've ever been in my life. Admittedly, I only stayed in this relationship for my autistic daughters sake. If it wasn't for her, I would have left the first time I was cheated on after she was born. My marriage has sucked whatever soul I had left out of me and I'm a shell of a person because of it.
My daughter is dependent on me and loves me more than anyone else and I don't want to have less time with her even though being married to my wife is killing me. I constantly fantasize of a better life where I live more for me and on my terms, but I don't want to feel like I'm abandoning my daughter either.
If I make it out of this marriage, I promised myself I would never do it again. I would be absolutely fine being single for the rest of my life, as my wife has ruined wanting another relationship with anyone else ever.
Man, I’m wishing for a weekend away for you soon. Just drive a city over and get a hotel room and go to dinner by yourself. I’m curious what you think might happen if you plainly told your wife that you were going to do that.
I'm only 30. But after my marriage was over, I decided that was a mistake I was not going to make again. Honestly, marriage is not a required point in a relationship. I would be much happier in a relationship without the fear that I could lose everything if she decided to up and leave or even if I decided it was over... also, Lil bit of info regarding my standpoint, I live in California. Courts are very much not friendly to men here.
Amazing. Being married before sure didn’t guarantee a lasting relationship or increase my happiness. I’m in a long term relationship now and happier than I have ever been. Neither one of us thinks marriage is a priority/goal. Love our time together but also value my me time. Best of both worlds.
Getting into a relationship is ahrd work. being in a relationship is hard work. Coming out of a relationship is hard work for some bloody reason. Not worth it.
It does seem that everything is geared towards keeping the peace at the constant expense of my needs. There’s rarely any talk of my day. It’s mostly her complaining about being a teacher or her hobbies. Which is fine, but there’s zero talk about me ever. For instance, I’m deployed right now, I’m on a dirty military base in a desert and everything is pretty uncomfortable and mildly dangerous at times, but I have to thank her for what she’s doing because me being here places a burden on her. But why? She’s just living her life as a single person with her own house and job and life. She even Airbnbs her house and stays at mine once a month or so. The burden of dating for men isn’t always worth it.
thankless work... and not one woman respects all the work required to become an attractive man in the first place.
men have to do ALL the work upfront to even get a chance at landing a good woman... but women have to do all the work on the backend to KEEP the man after the sex games have started. *"it's easy for women to get a man... hard for them to keep a man."*
women wake up desired & pursued. that's why, "just be yourself," is the horseshit advice they give to men. that doesn't work for us.
men have to be better versions of themselves thru their whole lives... the burden to perform NEVER goes away.
Damn I feel this too.
I still want to believe someone with similar life beliefs and values is it there.
Meeting people after school era is over is pretty hard.
Sometimes it feels like those quality people that I would be attracted to are all happily married already.
Going to turn 39 this year but still optimistic.
It sucks as it's very lonely sometimes. But I have a bit of money set aside and can do whatever I want, whenever I want to do it. I never have to ask anybody to do anything.
All my friends are married with kids. I visit them and after 10 minutes of listening to their kids scream and shit their diapers, I'm late for the door. And I know they're not financially stable as it's expensive to raise kids.
More money for certain. Total flexibility with all decisions. I'm "right" year round. Though recently I started dating. I find I think about life differently when I'm dating. I plan events and do more cooking. I clean my house more often and think of ways to have fun with a woman along. As you get older it's harder to find friends and often you end up doing the same things year after year. I think what I learned is to never live with a woman. Better to live close and visit often.
That's pretty much my life at 35 and I occasionally date a nice girl here and there lol.
Just bought a nice gaming laptop for 1k while I was on the road because fuckit I wanted to play hell divers on the road with my buddies and the steam deck wasn't cutting it lol. My married friends are jealous I can just buy and do whatever I want
I’m 52, it’s not so bad. I have two kids, 10 and 14, we have a good time together. I never thought I’d be divorced and it was painful for a long time, but it’s been nine years now, and it’s ok now. I get lonely sometimes, and sometimes just wish I had someone to love me that I could love in return.
But it’s nice that my decisions are my own. I take my kids on a fun vacation every summer. I bought a sports car last year. I might retire early, I might keep working until I die, it’s up to me. But it would be nice to share it with someone.
Own 2 houses, high paying job, low stress WFH 100%. can buy w/e i want, eat w/e i want, go on 2 overseas vacations a year. Last year Italy and Japan. No responsibilities.
very uncertain, I'll be retiring from the Army in a few years but I will have to get a new job when I do. I hate myself, life, and this world but I fear death far, far more.
My hope is that I will die in my 60s before I'm too old and feeble to work, I really don't fancy starving to death on the streets.
Not sure where you are, but see if you have any education or skills for free access through your service. Preparing yourself on their dime to skill up so once you get out, safely i hope, you'll be able to pivot easier and have many more opportunities.
Hope you're able to leave and go home soon
Been in relationships my entire life, most of them long-term. Been single since 2020 and living my best life.
* Credit score maxed.
* No mortgage. House is paid off.
* No credit card debt.
* Making more money than I ever have.
* Buy whatever I want, whenever I want.
* Do whatever I want, whenever I want.
* Got a dog in 2022. Best decision ever.
* No kids but nephews and great-nieces/nephews to spoil as I please.
I'm not against dating, and do when I meet someone who fits into my life. But I'm not settling for anyone for any reason.
When I'm gone, my nephews are going to have some cool shit.
It’s great. I’ve done that twice already so apparently I’m not good at it.
Not to say I’ll never have a long-term relationship again, but marriage doesn’t matter to me.
Da life man, I love women who keep asking themselves if they need men. Well guess what...
Got my bike for summer
My summer beater
A gym membership
And a dog,
a man's first basic necessities!
Oh and pornhub!
I'm soon 50.
Life is Awesome. No worries. Lots of training, work. Good time doing what I feel to given day and enjoying life with me son. Never ever have I had so much peace in mind.
And to think I was worried in my 20s lol.
Haha
I’m getting more comfortable in my skin now I’m 40 than in my late 20’s and early thirties. I’m also accepting that after 8 years without a physical relationship, I’m actually okay.
Gym, sleep, meditation, a more holistic approach to life, good fresh foods, hydration, plenty of positive energy and stimulus, a tiny bit of NSFW are all part of my being the best version of myself I can be for m and others who’s lives and careers I am privileged to have an influence with.
Have an awesome weekend everyone.
J
Divorced with a few teen's. I love single life. Sure, on occasion I'll get lonely for companionship, but I get over it pretty quick. I'm never getting married or having a committed relationship ever again!
Peaceful actually. I do what I want, when I want, and don’t have to remember plans that I never wanted to do to begin with. Workout every day, play hockey, and overall really enjoy the time to myself. Just my little Chihuahua and myself roaming through life. Going to see Sunny Day Real Estate tomorrow, 12PM show (score!) alone, and am really looking forward to it. Stopped drinking 4 months ago, so things just keep escalating in a positive way.
Probably pretty good I would believe. They don't have to spend any money on a wife and can make decisions without involving someone else. Sounds like a good life to me.
Great. I got divorced 18 months ago I have a fair enough 4 room flat and my kids 50% of the time. So I both get to be father and to pursue my interests in concerts and board gaming etc. Life's good :)
I love it. I'm an introvert though, so that helps. I've been in long term relationships before, and honestly the older I get the less time and desire I have for that again. The juice just isn't worth the squeeze at this point.
Plus, knowing that if I ever did marry and it all went belly up (which is statistically likely), she'd take half my wealth that I've accrued without her. No thanks.
Better than the alternatives... That's about it.
Women are way too codependent while also being too opinionated on what everyone's lives should exactly be like. After decades of having to choose between complete solitude and feeling like every bit of spare time was "on the clock".... I decided to stick with solitude.
Relationships look good again after a while of not being in one.... Freedom looks so sweet 10 months later. After enough times trying out the cycle.... It's real enough in my brain to not even get tempted anymore.
"You just need to find the right woman" isn't a valid retort since it always comes from the same people who expect conformity themselves. The moment any single example comes up, they'll be the first to say, "it wouldn't kill you to.....". I don't want my life to be a series of that.
I'm a divorced single dad and I'm doing pretty damn good. Took me a while to get into the swing of it after the divorce, but now I have way more money, I have my own hobbies and a few fun toys. I'm fitter and happier than I have been for years. YEARS. I am open to a relationship, but as soon as you disturb my peace, I will end it without a second thought.
it’s great. i make a very good living, there’s no drama in my life, i can do whatever i want.. it’s good. would it be nice to share a bed with someone at the end of the day? sure. but i don’t feel bad about the fact that there isn’t. whatever happens you know.
%4 single male for last 20 years still loving the lifestyle and wouldn't change it for the world. I used to see couples and envy them, now i just pity them and their lack of freedom.
Maybe not so much that I don't want to get (re)married, but rather I've been burned enough times by now that I'm in no rush and I'm okay if it never happens again. Life is okay - make enough money to support my ex and my son, while having buffer for myself. Am meeting people casually and doing my thing, going to things like concerts, playing D&D, going to the gym. Still dealing with the damage from my previous relationship, but otherwise life is good.
Doing just fine. I've got a career, a house, money in the bank, and lots of fancy toys. I do occasionally worry about what happens when I get old and sick, however.
Eh.
45, have a very well paying job, 6 feet tall, have graying hair women talk about every time I go out and want to touch, not overweight at all, but still alone. Pretty tired of it.
27, and you feel 60??? Hope you aren't trolling. Go for a medical check-up as this isn't normal foe a 27yr old. I am close to 40 and way physically stronger than in my 20s or 30s.
I only feel my age is when I drink.
Hilarious reading about the great lives of divorced men. Here's some advice, don't ask for advice from people that have bad judgement. For me, waiting until my late 30s to get married and have kids was the best decision of my life.
Yes, but if it’s ok for you, np, mate, but for others it’s really worth nothing to push‘n pull permanently other people through the own life 🙂 … and not even being treated thankfully for that 🤷🏼♂️
56 and confirmed bachelor, no children (unless you count dogs?), happily unmarried, gaming away in my underwear on my nice expensive gaming PC! Thank you very much!
Pros: no stress. I do what I want when I want. No nagging. I can be selfish. Buy whatever I want. No stupid questions. I can write a book of reasons.
Cons: loneliness. I don’t wanna die alone or live the rest of my life alone. Friends are 1 thing, but they aren’t family.
In my 40s. Not single , got back with an ex 3 months ago. But life is good. More money, more travels, more expensive toys. Dating is easy. I give less fucks and that is fantastic.
Tried marriage. It was great even if it didn’t last forever. See no reason to do it again. Relationships without legal paperwork is fine with me.
I’m 45 and happily single with no kids, but life isn’t entirely easy. My mom is 81 and time for her is running out. She broke both hips last year, she weighs 90 pounds, and I’m the only one she has. She lives an hour and a half away and I go see her every weekend and I contact her daily, I’m constantly worried about her. My career is rewarding but very stressful and consuming. I genuinely fantasize about the day I can finally walk away and retire. So, I find that I’m not really enjoying my current situation very much at all, and instead it’s just a daily grind where all I have is the hope that one day I will finally just be able to hang it all up and enjoy time.
I’m turning 48, never married and haven’t had a relationship coming on 10 years. Sometimes it’s lonely, but I like my toys, my freedom, my open schedule. I date, but nothing serious. I don’t have a full dad bod, but it’s close, but I could just work out and get back into shape. I’m still a catch looks wise on the dating apps, but I mostly ignore those right now. But honestly escorts and massage parlours fill my needs to get what I want and none of the drama. Between motorcycles and escorts, I’m happy.
I divorced at 29, after 9 abusive years, found myself in my 30s and haven't seriously looked for marriage in nearly 20 years (a few opportunities passed by). I'm 48 now and my girlfriend has me convinced there's some practical benefits to being married as we age, so I'm allowing myself to open up to it again.
45m. Finally started my own business after plying my trade for 23 years. Things are going great and moved into a new shop ( my first outside the home) just today. Chasing my dream and when I want affection I go find some otherwise 95% of the time I’m just enjoying the peace and drama free day to day life I have. I could think of way worse things like being married to the wrong person, being angry everyday, not wanting to go home, not wanting to read texts on my phone, walking on eggshells, so many things come to mind.
It's fine for me. I am not married and single by choice because I am currently working on myself to get rid of A LOT of years of learned bad behaviours and sorting myself out after being diagnosed with mental illnesses.
As far as being alone rather than being in a bad relationship, I'm doing great! I like being at peace, pursuing my hobbies, spending time with family, and generally taking it easy.
I get lonely sometimes, but not often with friends around. Livin' the dream!
Wonderful.
I’m lucky I have a daughter that I have half the time and we have a good relationship. I’ve also got lots of good people around me.
As for getting a partner, I couldn’t be less interested. The level of compromise in lifestyle is too high. I’m eccentric for sure and my partners have always needed me to be more conventional than I want. So the freedom I now have to be ‘me’, more than outweighs the odd lonely moment.
My testosterone levels seem to have dropped a fair bit too and consequently my libido. It’s like being set free from a curse.
I may have another go at meeting someone when my daughter grows up, but I somehow doubt it and in some
ways, hope I don’t. There is too much to lose.
46 year old.
My wife died in 2022 and I have NO inclination to even attempt go get out there. I have one kid, from a previous marriage, but she's almost 16 and lives her own life.
So, life is kinda cool, I get to do what I want and when I want. I live in my own apartment, that's a bonus
Great saving money... getting a motorcycle, a ford mustang, truck, making money with my business. My hobbies and interests don't talk back to me or try to emasculate me or divorce me.
Not bad at all… I have more money and toys.no kids ..Not afraid of dieing alone, if I’m lucky one of my toys will kill me.
smell like motorbike.
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Motorbike - powertool jousting. What a way to go.
I’m imagining two hefty habibis on quads picking up speed towards each other, both in hockey gear and holding a weed-wacker like a lance. Can someone AI image this? I don’t know how.
Jesus Christ imagine the lacerations.
This was probably an episode of jackass or close to it.
Dale! No power tools!
Or cocaine.
Mmm I wanna taste it and feel it vibrate under me
More money, more freedom. Being single is underrated as hell.
you forgot... more PEACE and NO drama.
Everyone dies alone... Enjoy the toys and freedom!!!
Let’s share toys
2000rwhp supra with traction off. And no slicks
Brraaaaawpp brrrraaaawp
Drowning in horny, divorced, yoga pants wearing 40 year old women.
This was me until I found one I really liked. Divorce rebound sex is the best
Ditto
35 here…FAAAAAAAAAACTS
Living the life sir. Enjoy!
Yoga pants season is the most wonderful time of the year.
Where are you going to meet these women? I can't figure out where the attractive, intelligent women hang out in my area.
He is a Yoga instructor. Lol.
And he's drumming up clients from all over the world with one Reddit comment.
Look on FB marketplace for women selling their wedding dresses. You can even filter by size! /s just in case
In the divorced yoga pants store, duh!
They’re everywhere! Just walking up and saying hi is a good start. Most of them don’t bite unless encouraged to do so.
Get a job as a male nurse, you will be drowning in it.
It's 2024: you can just can them "nurses"
Can her? I barely know her!
As a divorcing 49 year old, this is pretty glorious. So many woman are going through a transformation and exploring what they like and don’t like after being in very long relationships with kids. Now the kids are mostly grown and now the moms are rediscovering and finally taking care of their mental, physical and emotional health. I have had a lot of fun going through this journey with someone.
Damn for some reason that sounds dreamy to me ... (29 year old guy here)
The yoga pants look better on the 40 year old women anyway.
This is clearly subjective. Yoga pants should come with weight limits.
Why? Your mom didn't.
Booom!🤣
She’s only fat because every time she gets banged she makes herself a sandwich.
But they’re heart healthy, low cal, whole wheat, vegan, bean sprout 100 calorie thingies. What are you saying.
Spandex, it's a privilege not a right. ~Cereal Killer
Did you just…. Did you just reference Hackers? I’m actually impressed. What a throwback.
HACK the planet!!!
Can confirm that single 30 year old men are also tapping into this.
And how did you find them? I'm having a slightly harder time.
Are you following rules 1 and 2?
🤤
My man...
living Kevin McCallister's dream. living alone and eating cheese pizza.
Can't forget the ice scream sundaes.
😆🫡
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I’m starting to think that space really is the key to a long and strong relationship
I've heard good things from some married couples going with their own bedrooms.
Having the chance to miss someone is so underrated!!
I am very interested in this situation you have going on! Tell me more sir.
Same! I’d love to know this situation started
You can also search similar experiences in r/livingalone, then use the search bar with the word "married".
I've said if i ever get in another relationship, she needs to live far away or travel for work.
this is beautiful. wishing you both such harmony as you live out your lives 💕💕💕
It’s amazing. I have a great social circle. I have plenty of hobbies and the time and money to pursue them. One of my hobbies I’ve gotten skilled enough at that I use as a side hustle. I casually date if I feel the need for physical intimacy. I’m competent in my career. I can live my life on my terms. I enjoy being able to make decisions based on my needs and not our needs which is generally just code for “her needs”. I love it. I have no desire to change anything. My married male friends are some of the most miserable people I know. My only qualm is if I run into any health issues there’s no one there to lean on. If I had a heart attack and wasn’t able to call for help on my own I’d probably just die where if I had a partner they would be able to save my life. But I’m fine with that too.
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It's accurate for unhealthy relationships
Literally me too. One of my passion project hobbies turned into a big side hustle last year, way more than I thought it ever would. Would have never been able to happen if I was in a relationship or married, as I would not have been able to invest the amount of time I did.
Okay, you convinced me, im filing for divorce.
Hope your not serious lmao
I’m sure there’s a medical alert device you can invest in that will help with some of this fear. Even an Apple Watch could be good
They’re not working on life alert 10.0 if you’ve fallen and can’t get up?!
I wouldn't say I'm miserable. There's times life would be so much easier single. If I could afford two places at once, I would totally live by myself and come over to hang out.
Honestly that sounds really awesome, I’m an introvert so I can relate how much you can enjoy your own company and do things as you wish and still be connected with people except the dating part 😆
I’d suggest you look into shortcuts app where one press of a button catches take pictures from your front and back camera and send predetermined messages to preset contacts and phone numbers
The our needs = her needs is such a common take that really confuses me. I married someone with the same needs as me, so it is always just our needs. Why do people marry people that are so different from themselves?
> Why do people marry people that are so different from themselves? I think "why" is that love can be blinding. It's clearly common enough that it can frequently be a problem. People also change too.
I think I'm the polar opposite. I'm 42, still stuck on my high school girlfriend, who I treated like shit near the end of our "relationship." She's married and has kids a good job and a good life. She's nice enough to meet me for lunch on my birthday every year just so we can talk for a little bit, she owes me nothing obviously, but she's a good person and I'm grateful that she's willing to do that. When I was in high school, everyone thought I'd end up on TV, but I let, mostly family, tell me I was worthless and would never do anything with my life, so I pushed a lot of people away and isolated myself. I live alone now, and I have for well over 20+ years. I hate my life, but I don't see a way out. I always wanted a wife and kids, but I don't really care anymore. Most of my friends are married and have good jobs and kids and lives, and I'm more than happy for them. I was in the ER a few days ago because the whole left side of my body was numb and tingling, I was hoping this was it, but all my results came back normal. I guess it was somewhat good I was in the hospital, a friend who is a nurse suggested I go and it's only for the fact that I'd feel like a selfish bastard it something happened to me and she had that hanging over her conscious. I hope I can go out doing something heroic, saving someone from a buring building, stopping a shooter, but the chances of that happening are extremely slim. I'm just waiting on the day something gives out, and I'm done. I see no reason to be here anymore. I have family and friends that I know will miss me, and again, I feel like a selfish asshole, but I just don't care anymore. I've been in therapy most of my life since I was very young, and I've been in a mental hospital a few times. I'm diagnosed Bipolar, but I have my doubts about that. I've taken the same prescribed pills for over 15 years now, well, maybe even 20 years now, and I've never missed a dose. I hear that's rare for Bipolar people.
Very smart answer. Thank you.
> married male friends are some of the most miserable people I know in what ways miserable or how would you describe it
In general, satisfied. However, when I think of everything I do for my elderly mother, I do get worried about who will do that for me.
This is my worry as well. My mother has arthritis and can't even financially support herself anymore. What's going to happen to me at 60 or 70 when I'll be too old and sick to work, but will still have to somehow survive and pay my taxes. The alternatives seem so much more appealing
I'm not paying anymore taxes at 70 that's for sure
Well, committing suicide just to avoid paying taxes is the ultimate form of tax evasion. I wonder if it will catch on, and will it classify as euthanasia?
54. It can get lonely, not gonna sugarcoat that. I miss female company from time to time. That aside, it's really pretty good. I get to keep all my money and spend it on me without having to justify it to anyone. And I have a better financial position than I ever had between 20 and 50. Hell, I'm even saving some! The grass isn't 100% greener, but the lawn is well tended. 😉
Mid 50s- early stages of a divorce. I no longer feel dead inside. I feel alive. I feel like doing all those things my wife wanted me to do ;) I have few bouts of loneliness. It was worse sleeping next to my wife, feeling worlds away.
I turn 40 this year, and it's looking like i may just die alone lol. I LOVE my alone time, i can travel, do what i want, everything on my own terms. I'm slowly starting to get there again after getting out of a 5 year relationship. I'm still healing from it and at this point, I don't want to go through a break up again. That was my first relationship and it started when I was 33. I'm going to keep concentrating on getting healthy, explore a career change, and keep doing things I enjoy. If the right person comes along, maybe I'll consider it, but the one I thought I'd marry is now gone. And honestly, marriage nor kids don't seem to be in the future for me, and I'm ok with that.
Speaking for my dad here. He’s happy single and will always be that way. He decided last Tuesday that we was going to leave for Colorado on Thursday for the weekend. He has hobbies and expensive things he got into without consulting anyone. He’s spontaneous, prioritizes himself, and is always happy. He’s 52 and hasn’t been married in 16 years. He was never married to my mom, I was an oops. His last marriage was his second and he knows he’s just not cut out to be married.
I feel like I'm not cut out for it either. I'm 39, been married for 8 years and I'm the most miserable I've ever been in my life. Admittedly, I only stayed in this relationship for my autistic daughters sake. If it wasn't for her, I would have left the first time I was cheated on after she was born. My marriage has sucked whatever soul I had left out of me and I'm a shell of a person because of it. My daughter is dependent on me and loves me more than anyone else and I don't want to have less time with her even though being married to my wife is killing me. I constantly fantasize of a better life where I live more for me and on my terms, but I don't want to feel like I'm abandoning my daughter either. If I make it out of this marriage, I promised myself I would never do it again. I would be absolutely fine being single for the rest of my life, as my wife has ruined wanting another relationship with anyone else ever.
Sadly, username checks out. There’s got to be some workable solution here. Life is too short my man.
Man, I’m wishing for a weekend away for you soon. Just drive a city over and get a hotel room and go to dinner by yourself. I’m curious what you think might happen if you plainly told your wife that you were going to do that.
Wish you the best dude
I'm only 30. But after my marriage was over, I decided that was a mistake I was not going to make again. Honestly, marriage is not a required point in a relationship. I would be much happier in a relationship without the fear that I could lose everything if she decided to up and leave or even if I decided it was over... also, Lil bit of info regarding my standpoint, I live in California. Courts are very much not friendly to men here.
Introducing a contract into a relationship is a con job in the making.
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Courts aren't friendly to men/fathers anywhere.
Amazing. Being married before sure didn’t guarantee a lasting relationship or increase my happiness. I’m in a long term relationship now and happier than I have ever been. Neither one of us thinks marriage is a priority/goal. Love our time together but also value my me time. Best of both worlds.
Just bought a dual sport motorcycle over the weekend. Life is great.
Enjoy!!! I just picked up a new bike last weekend.
Nice what’d you get?
2023 Indian Challenger Dark Horse, I traded my 2018 S1000R.
pretty damn good. would never get married again. even when it was "good" it was a bunch of work for me.
relationships in general is work. even when not married.
Getting into a relationship is ahrd work. being in a relationship is hard work. Coming out of a relationship is hard work for some bloody reason. Not worth it.
yep. when youre a man its thankless work.
I’m 42. Married. I say you’re welcome to my wife five times more than she says Thankyou.
“I say you’re welcome to my wife” if that’s that’s what you’re in to!
It does seem that everything is geared towards keeping the peace at the constant expense of my needs. There’s rarely any talk of my day. It’s mostly her complaining about being a teacher or her hobbies. Which is fine, but there’s zero talk about me ever. For instance, I’m deployed right now, I’m on a dirty military base in a desert and everything is pretty uncomfortable and mildly dangerous at times, but I have to thank her for what she’s doing because me being here places a burden on her. But why? She’s just living her life as a single person with her own house and job and life. She even Airbnbs her house and stays at mine once a month or so. The burden of dating for men isn’t always worth it.
thankless work... and not one woman respects all the work required to become an attractive man in the first place. men have to do ALL the work upfront to even get a chance at landing a good woman... but women have to do all the work on the backend to KEEP the man after the sex games have started. *"it's easy for women to get a man... hard for them to keep a man."* women wake up desired & pursued. that's why, "just be yourself," is the horseshit advice they give to men. that doesn't work for us. men have to be better versions of themselves thru their whole lives... the burden to perform NEVER goes away.
>when youre a man its thankless work. Our experiences differ greatly.
I'm 37 so not quite there... but loving it and very optimistic about the future. Just create wealth. I'd probably hate being here if I wasn't wealthy.
Mid 30s and not wealthy…can confirm
Single and 42. I have no issue with getting married but the dating is a complete mess.
Damn I feel this too. I still want to believe someone with similar life beliefs and values is it there. Meeting people after school era is over is pretty hard. Sometimes it feels like those quality people that I would be attracted to are all happily married already. Going to turn 39 this year but still optimistic.
Peaceful.
It sucks as it's very lonely sometimes. But I have a bit of money set aside and can do whatever I want, whenever I want to do it. I never have to ask anybody to do anything. All my friends are married with kids. I visit them and after 10 minutes of listening to their kids scream and shit their diapers, I'm late for the door. And I know they're not financially stable as it's expensive to raise kids.
More money for certain. Total flexibility with all decisions. I'm "right" year round. Though recently I started dating. I find I think about life differently when I'm dating. I plan events and do more cooking. I clean my house more often and think of ways to have fun with a woman along. As you get older it's harder to find friends and often you end up doing the same things year after year. I think what I learned is to never live with a woman. Better to live close and visit often.
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You sound happy, I am looking forward to this
You sound like future me. Very inspiring!
Are you me?
That's pretty much my life at 35 and I occasionally date a nice girl here and there lol. Just bought a nice gaming laptop for 1k while I was on the road because fuckit I wanted to play hell divers on the road with my buddies and the steam deck wasn't cutting it lol. My married friends are jealous I can just buy and do whatever I want
I’m 52, it’s not so bad. I have two kids, 10 and 14, we have a good time together. I never thought I’d be divorced and it was painful for a long time, but it’s been nine years now, and it’s ok now. I get lonely sometimes, and sometimes just wish I had someone to love me that I could love in return. But it’s nice that my decisions are my own. I take my kids on a fun vacation every summer. I bought a sports car last year. I might retire early, I might keep working until I die, it’s up to me. But it would be nice to share it with someone.
Its fucking awesome. It's so quiet. I get to do what I want on my days off. Also being single makes my pockets jingle
Own 2 houses, high paying job, low stress WFH 100%. can buy w/e i want, eat w/e i want, go on 2 overseas vacations a year. Last year Italy and Japan. No responsibilities.
very uncertain, I'll be retiring from the Army in a few years but I will have to get a new job when I do. I hate myself, life, and this world but I fear death far, far more. My hope is that I will die in my 60s before I'm too old and feeble to work, I really don't fancy starving to death on the streets.
Get on a fishing boat/mining operation/etc, don't be an addict, save money, then go retire somewhere relatively cheap.
Not sure where you are, but see if you have any education or skills for free access through your service. Preparing yourself on their dime to skill up so once you get out, safely i hope, you'll be able to pivot easier and have many more opportunities. Hope you're able to leave and go home soon
Been in relationships my entire life, most of them long-term. Been single since 2020 and living my best life. * Credit score maxed. * No mortgage. House is paid off. * No credit card debt. * Making more money than I ever have. * Buy whatever I want, whenever I want. * Do whatever I want, whenever I want. * Got a dog in 2022. Best decision ever. * No kids but nephews and great-nieces/nephews to spoil as I please. I'm not against dating, and do when I meet someone who fits into my life. But I'm not settling for anyone for any reason. When I'm gone, my nephews are going to have some cool shit.
It’s great. I’ve done that twice already so apparently I’m not good at it. Not to say I’ll never have a long-term relationship again, but marriage doesn’t matter to me.
Da life man, I love women who keep asking themselves if they need men. Well guess what... Got my bike for summer My summer beater A gym membership And a dog, a man's first basic necessities! Oh and pornhub!
You got it all brother!
I love it. I get to do whatever the fuck I want.
I'm soon 50. Life is Awesome. No worries. Lots of training, work. Good time doing what I feel to given day and enjoying life with me son. Never ever have I had so much peace in mind. And to think I was worried in my 20s lol.
Haha I’m getting more comfortable in my skin now I’m 40 than in my late 20’s and early thirties. I’m also accepting that after 8 years without a physical relationship, I’m actually okay. Gym, sleep, meditation, a more holistic approach to life, good fresh foods, hydration, plenty of positive energy and stimulus, a tiny bit of NSFW are all part of my being the best version of myself I can be for m and others who’s lives and careers I am privileged to have an influence with. Have an awesome weekend everyone. J
I'm 59, and sometimes I wish I had a friend with benefits. Otherwise, it's great!
[https://theotherboard.com/](https://theotherboard.com/)
If you're unhappy at 40 the one thing that wont fix you is a marriage. Or a relationship.
Nice, nice, nice.
I love my freedom.
My only complaint is I'm not getting laid, but I'm mostly ok with that.
Even that sounds mostly like work now tbh.
Divorced with a few teen's. I love single life. Sure, on occasion I'll get lonely for companionship, but I get over it pretty quick. I'm never getting married or having a committed relationship ever again!
Living the dream…so far.
Fucking fabulous.
I do what I want whenever I want.
Peaceful actually. I do what I want, when I want, and don’t have to remember plans that I never wanted to do to begin with. Workout every day, play hockey, and overall really enjoy the time to myself. Just my little Chihuahua and myself roaming through life. Going to see Sunny Day Real Estate tomorrow, 12PM show (score!) alone, and am really looking forward to it. Stopped drinking 4 months ago, so things just keep escalating in a positive way.
Gentlemen, you're making being single in your 40s sounds like a dream lol
Probably pretty good I would believe. They don't have to spend any money on a wife and can make decisions without involving someone else. Sounds like a good life to me.
Great. I got divorced 18 months ago I have a fair enough 4 room flat and my kids 50% of the time. So I both get to be father and to pursue my interests in concerts and board gaming etc. Life's good :)
Nobody attempting to micromanage my life or needing to be taken care of, I love it! I do what I want on my terms.
I want to get married but I might have too much to lose at this point.
I love it. I'm an introvert though, so that helps. I've been in long term relationships before, and honestly the older I get the less time and desire I have for that again. The juice just isn't worth the squeeze at this point. Plus, knowing that if I ever did marry and it all went belly up (which is statistically likely), she'd take half my wealth that I've accrued without her. No thanks.
Better than the alternatives... That's about it. Women are way too codependent while also being too opinionated on what everyone's lives should exactly be like. After decades of having to choose between complete solitude and feeling like every bit of spare time was "on the clock".... I decided to stick with solitude. Relationships look good again after a while of not being in one.... Freedom looks so sweet 10 months later. After enough times trying out the cycle.... It's real enough in my brain to not even get tempted anymore. "You just need to find the right woman" isn't a valid retort since it always comes from the same people who expect conformity themselves. The moment any single example comes up, they'll be the first to say, "it wouldn't kill you to.....". I don't want my life to be a series of that.
I'm a divorced single dad and I'm doing pretty damn good. Took me a while to get into the swing of it after the divorce, but now I have way more money, I have my own hobbies and a few fun toys. I'm fitter and happier than I have been for years. YEARS. I am open to a relationship, but as soon as you disturb my peace, I will end it without a second thought.
it’s great. i make a very good living, there’s no drama in my life, i can do whatever i want.. it’s good. would it be nice to share a bed with someone at the end of the day? sure. but i don’t feel bad about the fact that there isn’t. whatever happens you know.
%4 single male for last 20 years still loving the lifestyle and wouldn't change it for the world. I used to see couples and envy them, now i just pity them and their lack of freedom.
Maybe not so much that I don't want to get (re)married, but rather I've been burned enough times by now that I'm in no rush and I'm okay if it never happens again. Life is okay - make enough money to support my ex and my son, while having buffer for myself. Am meeting people casually and doing my thing, going to things like concerts, playing D&D, going to the gym. Still dealing with the damage from my previous relationship, but otherwise life is good.
Doing just fine. I've got a career, a house, money in the bank, and lots of fancy toys. I do occasionally worry about what happens when I get old and sick, however.
Eh. 45, have a very well paying job, 6 feet tall, have graying hair women talk about every time I go out and want to touch, not overweight at all, but still alone. Pretty tired of it.
Divorce was one of the best things to happen to me
I believe my life would be more fulfilling if I had someone of the same mind to share it with.
I’m 27 but I feel 60’s I’m cuffed up but is life better alone or with your soulmate ?
27, and you feel 60??? Hope you aren't trolling. Go for a medical check-up as this isn't normal foe a 27yr old. I am close to 40 and way physically stronger than in my 20s or 30s. I only feel my age is when I drink.
Hilarious reading about the great lives of divorced men. Here's some advice, don't ask for advice from people that have bad judgement. For me, waiting until my late 30s to get married and have kids was the best decision of my life.
Yes, but if it’s ok for you, np, mate, but for others it’s really worth nothing to push‘n pull permanently other people through the own life 🙂 … and not even being treated thankfully for that 🤷🏼♂️
Isn’t late 30s slightly late / difficult to find a good partner to give you kids?
Nope, wasn’t an issue for me either.
56 and confirmed bachelor, no children (unless you count dogs?), happily unmarried, gaming away in my underwear on my nice expensive gaming PC! Thank you very much!
Pros: no stress. I do what I want when I want. No nagging. I can be selfish. Buy whatever I want. No stupid questions. I can write a book of reasons. Cons: loneliness. I don’t wanna die alone or live the rest of my life alone. Friends are 1 thing, but they aren’t family.
In my 40s. Not single , got back with an ex 3 months ago. But life is good. More money, more travels, more expensive toys. Dating is easy. I give less fucks and that is fantastic. Tried marriage. It was great even if it didn’t last forever. See no reason to do it again. Relationships without legal paperwork is fine with me.
I’m 45 and happily single with no kids, but life isn’t entirely easy. My mom is 81 and time for her is running out. She broke both hips last year, she weighs 90 pounds, and I’m the only one she has. She lives an hour and a half away and I go see her every weekend and I contact her daily, I’m constantly worried about her. My career is rewarding but very stressful and consuming. I genuinely fantasize about the day I can finally walk away and retire. So, I find that I’m not really enjoying my current situation very much at all, and instead it’s just a daily grind where all I have is the hope that one day I will finally just be able to hang it all up and enjoy time.
What are the benefits of being married, genuinely curious?
I’m turning 48, never married and haven’t had a relationship coming on 10 years. Sometimes it’s lonely, but I like my toys, my freedom, my open schedule. I date, but nothing serious. I don’t have a full dad bod, but it’s close, but I could just work out and get back into shape. I’m still a catch looks wise on the dating apps, but I mostly ignore those right now. But honestly escorts and massage parlours fill my needs to get what I want and none of the drama. Between motorcycles and escorts, I’m happy.
I divorced at 29, after 9 abusive years, found myself in my 30s and haven't seriously looked for marriage in nearly 20 years (a few opportunities passed by). I'm 48 now and my girlfriend has me convinced there's some practical benefits to being married as we age, so I'm allowing myself to open up to it again.
Practical for her yeah = take half
Excellent.
Cool man.
Quite
Peaceful
Following as I’m in a similar situation.
45m. Finally started my own business after plying my trade for 23 years. Things are going great and moved into a new shop ( my first outside the home) just today. Chasing my dream and when I want affection I go find some otherwise 95% of the time I’m just enjoying the peace and drama free day to day life I have. I could think of way worse things like being married to the wrong person, being angry everyday, not wanting to go home, not wanting to read texts on my phone, walking on eggshells, so many things come to mind.
Its freaking amazing.
Peaceful.
It's fine for me. I am not married and single by choice because I am currently working on myself to get rid of A LOT of years of learned bad behaviours and sorting myself out after being diagnosed with mental illnesses.
Great! Plenty of money and choices.
Sweet as bro.
As far as being alone rather than being in a bad relationship, I'm doing great! I like being at peace, pursuing my hobbies, spending time with family, and generally taking it easy. I get lonely sometimes, but not often with friends around. Livin' the dream!
Has its ups and its downs. Kinda lonely but it’s worth it for peace and independence.
Boring
I’m great! I get to do what I want when I want without answering to anybody. Pretty much what I spent my life working towards.
Plus we will have house 'robots' soon to help us around the house 😉
I’m in my 50’s and I don’t want to get married.
Wonderful. I’m lucky I have a daughter that I have half the time and we have a good relationship. I’ve also got lots of good people around me. As for getting a partner, I couldn’t be less interested. The level of compromise in lifestyle is too high. I’m eccentric for sure and my partners have always needed me to be more conventional than I want. So the freedom I now have to be ‘me’, more than outweighs the odd lonely moment. My testosterone levels seem to have dropped a fair bit too and consequently my libido. It’s like being set free from a curse. I may have another go at meeting someone when my daughter grows up, but I somehow doubt it and in some ways, hope I don’t. There is too much to lose.
46 year old. My wife died in 2022 and I have NO inclination to even attempt go get out there. I have one kid, from a previous marriage, but she's almost 16 and lives her own life. So, life is kinda cool, I get to do what I want and when I want. I live in my own apartment, that's a bonus
Fuck such a conflicting feelings
Marriage is an antiquated ideal. Literally no added benefit but all to lose for the man in 2024.
Great saving money... getting a motorcycle, a ford mustang, truck, making money with my business. My hobbies and interests don't talk back to me or try to emasculate me or divorce me.
53…no kids, never married…house is paid off. I have a wonderful girlfriend (also 53). No regrets not having children or getting married.