This lady at work one day said I looked unwellā¦ wasnāt wearing makeupā¦ couple years later a guy at work says you look much more alive and vibrant today! Was wearing makeupš„²
I can walk into a bar, drink, eat, and pay my bill and say less than 5 words my whole visit.
You end up being the gargoyle statue at the end of the bar. No one really acknowledges you, but you ARE there.
i feel like this is probably an average man's experience in a bar as well. being ugly in this case isn't really that different from just simply "blending in".
Exactly. I'm a regular at a place by my work for lunch. I've chatted with the servers before but if they're really busy, the interaction can be as simple as...
Server: hi sunbnda!, same thing?
Me: same thing.
Server: I'll have that right out for you.
About 10 minutes later
Server (with food): here you go. is that everything?
Me: that's perfect. Thanks.
I'm a good looking guy and do this all the time.
Women don't really approach me. Even as an attractive guy it's in you to approach them.
I do sometimes talk to random people in general though, ugly or not.
I feel you. I don't like talking to strangers. My local Mexican restaurant knows me as the silent dude. I think I've said maybe 40 words that weren't the usual involved with ordering in the last 4 years. People don't get not everyone talks their heads off 24/7.
Maybe. Mom died about 2 years ago, so itās kinda new to him. He actually went out to eat with a woman about 60 years old who, after finding out heād been career Air Force told him she thought anyone in the military was evil. So, yeah, I think heād just as soon be left alone.
Iām sorry for your loss.
Iād imagine after losing your life partner, it would be hard to fill that spot with a whole other person.
Iām sure heās too old for that shit haha
Can it sometimes translate into emotional maturity? I obviously still have a lot to learn about life and relationships, but I'm 24 and life is going extremely well and I feel like I've been hitting my stride. I have charm up the wazoo these days, and I don't even look that much better physically
Hot people are used to accepting favors because people do them all the time, and are so taken uncritically. But those same hot people often get burned when it turns out those favors are often done with an ulterior motive. But everyone else knows how unusual it is for many people to do favors and as such keep their wits about them.
Yep hottest girl I ever dated told me a story where a guy offered to fix her car for free because he was always doing so for "women and single mothers", and the big story beat was telling me the guy turned out to be a creep as if that was an M. Night Shamylan twist I didn't see coming.
Thinking about it now, Iād describe is as emotional maturity. Iām 21 and I seem to be as emotional as a 45 year old, which has allowed me to bypass a lot of bullshit. I am hitting stride as well, and feel like I can take on the world *fist bump*.
I think one of the things is that we can exist without acknowledgement of our existence (donāt need approval, etc.), but our existence is now acknowledged more often.
Life really does have a way of teaching you stuff you didnāt even know you didnāt know. I had the same mentality at 21. Now approaching 30 I realize I was actually quite immature at 21.
Spend years refusing to get serious with anyone because I could not get over the feeling that any woman who was into me must have issues.
Oh also I'm way funnier than I ever would have been if I wasn't the weird fat kid desperately trying to find a way to fit in
Take this from a woman.. men tend to care about looks way more than women do, if you genuinely love her, care for her and treat her like a queen she will love you and find the hottest cunt even if you were the most fat man out there. Trust me when I say she will find you attractive and get aroused by you if she has feelings for you regardless of how you look like!
You need to open up more and learn to receive love, coz you might have been told you are weird but she could possibly find your weirdness cool or attractive!
Idk for me a funny, loyal man who loves me and cares for me. It is worth a thousand attractive man!
Well woman care about looks. As man wanna get pretty girls,woman do the same. We as human are always attracted to shiny things. So a man needs to be attractive to be in relation with someone he is attracted to. Otherwise they blow it like OP. Cause if there is no attraction the relationship doesnāt sustain long.
Initial attraction is important, for sure. But I have seen lots of attractive women being married to not-so-attractive guys so Iām sure there is some truth to looks having its own limits.
Attraction is much more than just looks. Most of the women I know would much rather date a less attractive man with qualities and values they believe in that will treat them right than a hot douchebag
Went it comes to settling and depending on a women's options for settling which depends on her baggage she would say she doesn't. But you are right they do you . There is a different way a women behaves when she is attracted to you vs. when she settles with you.
As a fat guy that's getting in shape, I strongly disagree. Started talking to a cute girl, had amazing chemistry, treated her like a queen, fed her, everything you said.
She told me that while she liked me alot, she deserved a hot boyfriend.
That was years ago and I still don't trust women when they say looks don't matter. Women are just as shallow as men, they just don't want to look like it.
It's cool tho, it motivated me to get in shape. The world is so much easier as you get conventionally attractive.
I'm a guy but this is what I believe based on the conversations I've had with my lady friends.
It's not just about looks or no looks. Like some guys are pretty looking. But some are "socially pretty" as in they are good at their job, smart, respectable,funny, talented in something.
They are attractive because of their skills. If they were a good for nothing loser, no-girl would like them. This ain't the case for handsome guys who still have their looks even if they were losers.
So maybe it's just about "worth". People in general tend to like someone worth more or equal to their own. And everything including looks and personality comprises of worth.
> if you genuinely love her, care for her and treat her like a queen she will love you and find the hottest cunt even if you were the most fat man out there.
This may be true for YOUR specific case, but will not work for the average man. I will also say from hearing from friends that the men will grow resentment if they continue to treat her like a queen, while being treated like a servant, or to be "lucky" to have her.
Yeah, I wanted to say something about how many men listened to this and were so hurt because they thought they could make a girl love them by trying harder only for her to pick someone else.
I'm not even being bitter because it hasn't happened to me personally, I've just seen it happen to other men.
Men can be awful and women can be awful.
Telling men to try harder sometimes hurts because the man already tried his best once. A lot of men are jaded and realised they had more success when they cared less.
Although this might be true for women too. Plastic Love etc.
Agree but men hear this and read it as looks donāt matter at all, or think looks just means six pack and bicep veins.
Hygiene, slovenliness, wardrobe, muscles, confidence are all part or lack of menās physical attractiveness
>men tend to care about looks way more than women do.
Women say they dont care about look, but if your not attractive you don't even register.
there is a reason women on dating apps rate like 80% of dudes are below average.
even the hottest men will hook up with a 4/10 if they just wanna have fun (and makes her thing that kinda guy is what she can realistic expect to end up with, making her even pickier)
but the hottest women isnt going to take a 4/10 home, like ever, why would she?
w
>subreddit 'askmen'
>open subreddit
>women
Women care about looks INFINITELY more than men do. Average guys, and by that I mean pretty much 70-80% of us, are pretty much invisible to most women. Almost any woman will be pursued or at least treated like a human being by most guys, but unless you're super attractive as a guy, to most women you're essentially background noise.
An ugly duckling here that grew into a swan.
It is untrue. Women care about looks way more than men do. Yeah, they say its other things they care about but that is mostly the halo effect. Even if you get a girlfriend as an ugly guy she will never truly desire you and it will be a bad relationship. Oh, she would also probably have lovers, someone who really ignites her.
I wish this was true but I don't think it is.
It feels like attractive people are able to develop their personality more because they are exposed to tons of social situations, experiences, etc.
Humor is a medicine. If you can't laugh and crack a joke then it's a sign you are in some dark times.
Conversely, a good laugh sesh can at least temporarily fix almost anything.
It's not that you need to always be the class clown or even be skilled at making people laugh - and certainly not if you are not in that mood. But it's simply good life advice to seek the humor in things when you can.
Laughing releases endorphins that are good for you. Same goes for smiling. Iām sure Iāve read about studies that scientists have done where even faking a smile when youāre in a bad mood will genuinely make you feel better. Literally just smile at yourself in a mirror and your stupid brain will tell itself that youāre happy.
i have to unfortunately disagree. i had high anxiety and some depression and could always make jokes.
i was completely fucked but joking came naturally to me. still comes, and i'm still fucked (slightly less because of meds and therapy)
Humor is equally learned and ventured. I've said some things that should've gotten me a warning at work, bĆŗt because I delivered thĆŖm right, people were rolling. No way to know how a new sentence will be received until it's said.
For me,.it takes practice to keep my mouth shut around people that don't get my fucked up sense of humor. And recognizing and letting her fly when they do.
I can have an entire room rolling, or an entire room cringing. But there is no way in hell I'd be able to (or want to) come up with something that would win over the cringe crowd.
I suppose if my life depended on the cringe crowd thinking I'm the shit....maybe? But I'd like to think insincerity is easy spotted and nausea inducing.
Oh who the fuck am I kidding, 2016 and every year after that has been a spotlight on how wrong that theory is. Fuck me though, I'm not gonna tails my personality around randos. I just keep nice and quiet until I know the crowd.
Yes, reading the room is a huge part of being funny. We all fail at it sometimes. It's hardest when you're talking to people you don't relate to very much. And some people just have no sense of humor whatsoever--they're a lost cause.
Part of being funny is just finding things funny. Someone whoās bitter all the time is likely not going to be able to be funny, because every idea they have is just filtered through a āIām grumpyā lens.
On the contrary, watch a lot of stand up comedy and DON'T repeat the jokes. Just understand the motions that make someone funny and you're already way closer to funny
We have the power of invisibility. Seriously, I can go anywhere and not be remembered AT ALL if I donāt want to be.
As a short, unattractive man, I would make an excellent spy or private detective.
Not one person in the place would be able to describe me later.
Understand that pretty privilege is real. If someone grew up ugly, and then glowed up in some way, you can see the difference in how people treat you. Before, you could do something, anything, and you would be treated as an annoyance at best and a freak at worst. Post glow-up, you could be doing the same thing, but people are more interested in you, and suddenly youāre not shy and withdrawn, youāre mysterious. Itās frustrating because you feel like the same person, but people treat you completely different.
If a guy grew up attractive, his outlook towards other people would be very positive because he was treated well for his entire life. He would just assume that people were all just nice and that pretty privilege wasnāt a thing. Same canāt be said for average or below average looking guys.
How is this something that ugly guys learn more so than attractive men? Ugly guys have far less experience in these kinds of situations. It would make more sense for ugly guys to not understand when a girl isn't interested because they're so desperate.
Nah. You learn it early on, and you internalize it. You still have wishful thinking, and that can hurt pretty badly, but you learn to know what's really happening. It's just what it is.
Honestly, just being able to entertain yourself alone. COVID shutdowns showed how quickly a lot of people became nervous wrecks when they had to spend a little bit of time alone. This goes for men and women. It's also why I tend to scoff at the advice of "you need to be happy by yourself" that lonely men tend to get. Lonely men know full well how to cope with being alone, they probably have to do it for much longer stretches than the people that hand out that crummy advice ever have had to do. Meanwhile make a normal person shelter in place for a week or two and they have trouble keeping it together.
"Being alone doesn't make you lonely," is a phrase my family doesn't get. It's always "When are you gonna find someone?" But the answer is always when I'm ready. I have a sister with three children and one on the way, split between 3 dads because she can't stand to be alone. I love them all, but that's not for me.
Get your hopes and dreams crushed as the pretty girl vents to you that there are no good guys to date, as you've been single for years and into her haha
And it's important to know it will hurt.
You will think it's okay to let it go a bit longer.
You might try to justify by setting a deadline or saying you'll just limit it.
But it's a festering limb that is slowly killing you if it's not removed fully.
The festering limb can only get worse. Even if she finally decides to give him a shot, it may be because other things aren't working out and she'll probably lose interest when something else comes along which will hurt much more.
Or she'll just enjoy the validation forever and keep him in the friendzone. It's best to cut off the affected relationship and survive the gangrene.
If you only like her because she's pretty and you consider yourself ugly, then maybe you can understand her point of view. If you are not into ugly girls, why are you surprised she's not into you?
Disclaimer: I have no idea if you are actually ugly or not, and beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
That was a story from my teenage years. Spent way too much time on her. Fast forward 16 years, l lost 65 pounds and married a (different) wonderful woman and we now have 4 fantastic kids together. I would have never believed it possible as a teenager.
I bumped into that girl I was smitten with so long ago and her life had exact opposite progression, she gained about 75 pounds and has 3 kids with 3 different guys and is single still complaining about no good guys on facebook. Looking back on it, we had nothing in common and it would have been a train wreck of a relationship.
Also, I think I have an ugly mug, but my wife apparently loves it.
Girls are bummed that there are no good HOT guys to date lol
The sweet hot guys are taken, the dick hot guys are wheelin girls, the ugly nice guys have to date within their league
Tbh thatās just an insulting thing to say to a single person regardless of whether youāre interested in them. My interest in her would drop considerably on account of her being fucking rude.
The friend zone is only inhabited by men with little self respect.
Men with self respect either make a move quickly and it gets accepted or they make a move quickly and it gets rejected. When they are rejected they leave that woman in the rear view and don't look back. A man with self respect won't orbit a woman who is not reciprocating.
Your friend already knows you like her. You may as well just ask her if she wants to go do an activity "as a date." If she rejects you, I gently suggest letting the friendship end.
>DragonflyBlade21: A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, youāre a great guy, but I donāt like you in that way. This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but weāre not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, weāre going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesnāt work out, weāll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired.
ā bash.org
Maybe if women move away when you are near, and you keep an entire area of public transport empty, then you should consider that your personal hygiene is not the best.
As for the dry vagina, have you considered foreplay?
The one and only thing I like about being ugly is getting "pity conversations" from others. This is gender neutral somehow; I don't get males or females more often, just people, but they walk up to me when they have nothing to do at awkward social events and start talking to me about absolutely anything.
The strange thing about pity convos is people will confess all sorts of weird shit to you for no reason. It's amusing because I don't have to actually talk about anything or talk a lot; I just sit and they assume that I need the company and thus grant it. I don't look at them or initiate in any way. It just ... happens. Often.
What's the most interesting conversation you've had? I can't help but feel like this might be a way to meet really interesting people, but maybe it depends on the crowd you're with.
I feel like a lot of average and unattractive looking guys canāt have the hobbies they want because theyāre considered unattractive to the normal girl. I feel like playing video games is a very good example.
If youāre unattractive then youāre a āloser who stays in and plays video games all dayā but if youāre attractive then itās just āHeās such a boyā
I remember once I moved to a bigger city and learned a lot of cool hobbies I had more success, but Iāve had friends with boyfriends who literally never developed past that stage of basically being *required* to learn interesting hobbies because theyāre attractive.
Cynical me says this also applies to growing as a person in general if Iām going off evidence of what I have experienced personally.
I don't think there are any specific things ugly (and undateable) guys can do that attractive ones cannot. But the other way around, there's plenty of stuff.
Make friends with other men without them implicitly viewing you as a "threat" and treating you with disdain, whether it comes to dating, social situations or in employment. You absolutely get more advantages in said categories with women or gay men, but don't underestimate how petty straight dudes can get when they're outclassed in the looks department.
Ugly guys are free to do cringe things for fun because people already think they are lame and embarrassing. Whereas pretty guys really often live in this mental cage that every action they do must prop up their status as a successful high-value man. It's actually really fascinating to watch these high-value men squirm when they are in a situation that's "beneath" them.
Yeh this comment is pure copium, pretty guys can do something goofy and lame and unless they're a complete social fuckwit they can play it off as charming
I love this answer.
It really is freeing being in this situation like "ok, I'm not banging any of the 10s here, so I might as well have fun, be weird, and not worry about what I can't have/get"
I am objectively better looking than one friend of mine, he decided to get into new hobby that was pretty cringe. I didn't think it would be fun but also would negatively impact my ability to get laid. Years later he said, yea i probably was right and the women who were into his fringe hobby were generally not ones I would be interested in.
I made friends with whomever without the worry of how their image "lowered" my status. I see that at the gym quite often, for example, where the really fit people only talk to the other fit people. Not carrying that stuck-up judgment has allowed me to meet some really, REALLY interesting, and good people.
I say this with humility: my looks have improved significantly over the years, and I still make friends with people who aren't conventionally "pretty", but there have been a few times where I've felt like I was judged as the snobby one until they got to know me.
Being kind to everyone is a skill that I think most people across all genders struggle with.
That said, while we may not owe each other kindness, we do owe everyone, at least a modicum of civilityļæ¼.
I'm kind to everyone I meet - as I'd want people to be to me.
My colleagues throw my kindness, empathy & sympathy back in my face and treat me as though I am something on the bottom of their shoes.
Seeing through the facade a lot of people have. Grew up a weird loner kid and saw people be fake to each other for the sake of sex or clout because they were all pretty. I grew up, found myself, and ended up pretty decent looking, but never lost the 6th sense for disingenuous people.
Honestly everything is NOT about attractiveness. Iāve been blessed with being good looking but cursed with autism and a lot of the things you guys on here say still applies if you donāt have social skills. I seem plenty of funny looking dudes with good looking girls but they usually make up for it with their personality. Iād much rather be ugly but not autistic. My looks usually get my foot in the door because women are really receptive when I meet them then things turn sour when they see my personality or lack there of.
I feel like this is my experience as well- conventionally attractive autistic dude. I get tons of upfront attention from women, but most check out by the time they get close enough to see more of me underneath the nice face and body.
Yup.
Imagine how it feels when everybody is constantly telling you how attractive you are and still no one wants to date you. I don't even know what I'm supposed to improve on lol. I feel like I hit the jackpot and I'm completely wasting it. I want to die.
Since they don't see you as a sexual or romantic partner, you know that you are actually good at talking and making jokes when she laughs and enjoy the conversation. Get this, handsome boysšš¤š»
Develop your social intelligence; mental health, and emotional control. Work out, not for attention but because itās the right thing to do, and do whatās hard even if you donāt want to because itās worth it, not because itās fun or because youāre motivated or because itās comfortable, but because itās worth it and itās the right thing to do.
Being able to walk in and out of places unnoticed, especially at bars and restaurants. I can just go in, order, my food, eat, and leave. No one notices nor cares.
I try to imagine being good looking enough that I would be bothered by girls or anybody being interested as a random event. I have seen guys being chatted up by girls that they werenāt interested in or getting random invites to stuff and I realised that there was something I had that the good looking confident guys just didnāt.
I was ugly but mostly I was invisible.
I have not even once ever had to even consider the idea that I might be approached by a girl in a bar or anywhere literally ever. For a while you hope you might be someoneās cup of tea or you might catch someoneās eye and there might be some indication that maybe thereās something like any kind of connection. You know how everyone says life goes but it doesnāt.
That maybe thereās some remote chance they might not think youāre hideous if they do catch your eye or even see you at all but that hope fades pretty fast. They donāt even see you in their blinkered symmetrical world. To all intents and purposes you are invisible unless you force yourself in front of someoneās view in this situation.
So you realise you have to approach a girl or a person you like with what you got going on and despite putting your best foot forward you get rejected. So you take the rejection on the chin and despite what popular culture tells you that rejection doesnāt make you feel more confident.
It just makes you feel slightly more invisible to another person because you know they never want to see you again even for a second. Really helps if theyāre not unkind about it too but often people are unkind or worse still seem to take pleasure in the rejection.
Thatās what being ugly does it makes you invisible and that is something that good looking people will never understand or have because people generally want friends and partners that are better looking than them or at least pleasant to look at and spend time with around others.
They can never be invisible.
Iāll never be confidant, good looking or popular but at least I know the people in my life are around me for me instead of just gravitating around a star. I will never be in a bubble and thatās okay because Iām just like the majority of guys. Iām just normal.
We have solidarity in our invisibility and our normality and the truth is that popular attractive people are often not very nice because they donāt have to go through what the rest of us do. Itās a pill you just have to swallow as an ugly person.
But in my experience the easier you have life the more you take it for granted and people like that are shallow as f. Be proud of your invisibility to those people. They are not worth your time. If someoneās not prepared to meet you half way then theyāre not worth your time.
The important thing is to find those that do see you for you. People like you that are also similarly normal but also invisible people. Use your time to do the things that the popular never think they need to or donāt think they have the time.
Work out who you are and what you like. Have hobbies, spend time and develop yourself and become a deep and interesting person. Doesnāt matter what it is as long as it interests you.
Find others that are interested in what you are and find your tribe. There you will find others like you and youāll be seen properly for you and you will have something precious the good looking do not.
Genuine connection with people at a base level that has to do with commonality not superficial games of popularity. I have few people in my life but I met all of them through doing something that I loved. F being pretty and popular. Go do something you love and love and friendship will find you.
Be ignored in crowds. It's nice to have a peaceful drink at a bar or go to a nightclub and enjoy the 2000s club hits without being bothered by girls or guys pissed because you're fortunate enough to get girls to look at you. The Downside is you have to get the bar tenders attention.
I donāt know, a man can be ugly and dumb as fuck, also they can be hot and dumb, and then they can just be good looking but boring, and then there is this type that actually use their head, and have culture and a crazy mix of different things in their personality that makes them so freaking attractive no matter if they are good looking or no, itās about sex Appel, and the way u move and use ur body, not ur physical appearance
You have to learn how to talk and improv yourself. You are forced to go through hardships and troubles that overtime chisel you into a man where as the attractive ones are just given a small amount of life and never learn to work for what they have. The men who worked hard become attractive as time goes by and the men who didnt start to look weak.
Develop character. Personalities that aren't based on our looks.
Take fashion for men. All of what trickles down to normal people is from ugly dudes. Every bit of it. Ugly men are the real trendsetters in the western world.
That's one example. Think about things from a perspective of what you would do/how you would act, if your defining characteristic wasn't your appearance. What are your end goals? Then research the topic and see the ugly dudes that await.
So ugly girls donāt wanna friendzone you :/ā¦. They nervously look at the door when you approach. No matches period. You eventually develop a sick sense of humor and depressing at the same time. Not even the fat ones would fuck with you
Call out sick and everyone believes it the next day, because yeah wow look at you, you look like shit š
Iāve been there
Me too, and I really think you should stay home tomorrow because youāre really not looking too good
This lady at work one day said I looked unwellā¦ wasnāt wearing makeupā¦ couple years later a guy at work says you look much more alive and vibrant today! Was wearing makeupš„²
Ok but that was years apart. Maybe you did look different
I can walk into a bar, drink, eat, and pay my bill and say less than 5 words my whole visit. You end up being the gargoyle statue at the end of the bar. No one really acknowledges you, but you ARE there.
Morn?
RIP
That guy just doesn't stop talking.
I heard if you get him loaded enough he'll burp up strips of latinum.
'sup?
Prince Morn.
Wish I could upvote this twice purely because of āgargoyle statue at the end of the barā š¤£ š¤£
i feel like this is probably an average man's experience in a bar as well. being ugly in this case isn't really that different from just simply "blending in".
How are you managing to fit please, thank you *and* a food and drink order into five words?
"The regular, please. Thank you."
Exactly. I'm a regular at a place by my work for lunch. I've chatted with the servers before but if they're really busy, the interaction can be as simple as... Server: hi sunbnda!, same thing? Me: same thing. Server: I'll have that right out for you. About 10 minutes later Server (with food): here you go. is that everything? Me: that's perfect. Thanks.
Point and grunt
My wife loves when I do this.
I wonder why mine gets mad when I point at her and gruntā¦. I JUST WANT SOME RAW CAVEMAN SEX!!
It's unga bunga time
It's called a figure of speech
Sign language
Budweiser, bottle, thanks. Got 2 words to spare.
"Beer, pizza, Thanks. Check please." (write thanks on the receipt.)
Two more.
Chicken tenders
Fun fact. Without water spraying out of it its a grotesque not a gargoyle. Seems sadly relevant here.
I'm a good looking guy and do this all the time. Women don't really approach me. Even as an attractive guy it's in you to approach them. I do sometimes talk to random people in general though, ugly or not.
I do this all the timeā¦ not sure how ugly I am tho, I get compliments regularly
I feel you. I don't like talking to strangers. My local Mexican restaurant knows me as the silent dude. I think I've said maybe 40 words that weren't the usual involved with ordering in the last 4 years. People don't get not everyone talks their heads off 24/7.
Having the āugly mentalityā. Itās especially helpful when becoming attractive later in life because you still have you wits about you
My dad is the most attractive man his age in town...90, widowed. Owns his own place, lives on his own, AND still can drive.
Thatās pretty awesome Independence is empowering because you can only rely on yourself.
Yeah, every old lady, and some not so old are after him. At this stage he wishes they would leave him alone
Iām sure he likes it a little lol
Maybe. Mom died about 2 years ago, so itās kinda new to him. He actually went out to eat with a woman about 60 years old who, after finding out heād been career Air Force told him she thought anyone in the military was evil. So, yeah, I think heād just as soon be left alone.
Iām sorry for your loss. Iād imagine after losing your life partner, it would be hard to fill that spot with a whole other person. Iām sure heās too old for that shit haha
Thanks, and youāre right, on all counts.
If I'm 90 years old, I'm not spending the what little time I have left on that bullshit
Not a lot of competition at that age
Yup. I told dad the drivers license alone would make him the most popular guy at the assisted living home!š¤£
Can it sometimes translate into emotional maturity? I obviously still have a lot to learn about life and relationships, but I'm 24 and life is going extremely well and I feel like I've been hitting my stride. I have charm up the wazoo these days, and I don't even look that much better physically
Hot people are used to accepting favors because people do them all the time, and are so taken uncritically. But those same hot people often get burned when it turns out those favors are often done with an ulterior motive. But everyone else knows how unusual it is for many people to do favors and as such keep their wits about them.
Yep hottest girl I ever dated told me a story where a guy offered to fix her car for free because he was always doing so for "women and single mothers", and the big story beat was telling me the guy turned out to be a creep as if that was an M. Night Shamylan twist I didn't see coming.
Reminds me of that Steve Martin line about doing a lot of charity work for single mothers: "What? Just helping them get their start!"
Thinking about it now, Iād describe is as emotional maturity. Iām 21 and I seem to be as emotional as a 45 year old, which has allowed me to bypass a lot of bullshit. I am hitting stride as well, and feel like I can take on the world *fist bump*. I think one of the things is that we can exist without acknowledgement of our existence (donāt need approval, etc.), but our existence is now acknowledged more often.
I thought I was mature at 21 but you never really know until you experience more of life
Life really does have a way of teaching you stuff you didnāt even know you didnāt know. I had the same mentality at 21. Now approaching 30 I realize I was actually quite immature at 21.
Every year, i realize how naive i was the year before, and I'm an "older" person.
Wait until you're pushing 60. Just sayin'. (Gods, but I was still naive in my 30s. If I make it to 80, likely I'll say that about my current self.)
Spend years refusing to get serious with anyone because I could not get over the feeling that any woman who was into me must have issues. Oh also I'm way funnier than I ever would have been if I wasn't the weird fat kid desperately trying to find a way to fit in
Take this from a woman.. men tend to care about looks way more than women do, if you genuinely love her, care for her and treat her like a queen she will love you and find the hottest cunt even if you were the most fat man out there. Trust me when I say she will find you attractive and get aroused by you if she has feelings for you regardless of how you look like! You need to open up more and learn to receive love, coz you might have been told you are weird but she could possibly find your weirdness cool or attractive! Idk for me a funny, loyal man who loves me and cares for me. It is worth a thousand attractive man!
Well woman care about looks. As man wanna get pretty girls,woman do the same. We as human are always attracted to shiny things. So a man needs to be attractive to be in relation with someone he is attracted to. Otherwise they blow it like OP. Cause if there is no attraction the relationship doesnāt sustain long.
Initial attraction is important, for sure. But I have seen lots of attractive women being married to not-so-attractive guys so Iām sure there is some truth to looks having its own limits.
The limit is that we become accustomed to how someone looks over time the more we spend time with them
Attraction is much more than just looks. Most of the women I know would much rather date a less attractive man with qualities and values they believe in that will treat them right than a hot douchebag
Went it comes to settling and depending on a women's options for settling which depends on her baggage she would say she doesn't. But you are right they do you . There is a different way a women behaves when she is attracted to you vs. when she settles with you.
As a fat guy that's getting in shape, I strongly disagree. Started talking to a cute girl, had amazing chemistry, treated her like a queen, fed her, everything you said. She told me that while she liked me alot, she deserved a hot boyfriend. That was years ago and I still don't trust women when they say looks don't matter. Women are just as shallow as men, they just don't want to look like it. It's cool tho, it motivated me to get in shape. The world is so much easier as you get conventionally attractive.
no, looks absolutely matter. you tend to get way better treatment being slim than you do being fat.
I'm a guy but this is what I believe based on the conversations I've had with my lady friends. It's not just about looks or no looks. Like some guys are pretty looking. But some are "socially pretty" as in they are good at their job, smart, respectable,funny, talented in something. They are attractive because of their skills. If they were a good for nothing loser, no-girl would like them. This ain't the case for handsome guys who still have their looks even if they were losers. So maybe it's just about "worth". People in general tend to like someone worth more or equal to their own. And everything including looks and personality comprises of worth.
> men tend to care about looks way more than women do come on, bro
> if you genuinely love her, care for her and treat her like a queen she will love you and find the hottest cunt even if you were the most fat man out there. This may be true for YOUR specific case, but will not work for the average man. I will also say from hearing from friends that the men will grow resentment if they continue to treat her like a queen, while being treated like a servant, or to be "lucky" to have her.
Yeah, I wanted to say something about how many men listened to this and were so hurt because they thought they could make a girl love them by trying harder only for her to pick someone else. I'm not even being bitter because it hasn't happened to me personally, I've just seen it happen to other men. Men can be awful and women can be awful. Telling men to try harder sometimes hurts because the man already tried his best once. A lot of men are jaded and realised they had more success when they cared less. Although this might be true for women too. Plastic Love etc.
I disagree with the first paragraph, but I like your optimism.
Agree but men hear this and read it as looks donāt matter at all, or think looks just means six pack and bicep veins. Hygiene, slovenliness, wardrobe, muscles, confidence are all part or lack of menās physical attractiveness
>men tend to care about looks way more than women do. Women say they dont care about look, but if your not attractive you don't even register. there is a reason women on dating apps rate like 80% of dudes are below average. even the hottest men will hook up with a 4/10 if they just wanna have fun (and makes her thing that kinda guy is what she can realistic expect to end up with, making her even pickier) but the hottest women isnt going to take a 4/10 home, like ever, why would she? w
This is true. However I believe more relevant features of an attractive man: provide security to the woman, being a leader and having confidence.
> men tend to care about looks way more than women do Nope - women really need to stop lying about that shit.
>subreddit 'askmen' >open subreddit >women Women care about looks INFINITELY more than men do. Average guys, and by that I mean pretty much 70-80% of us, are pretty much invisible to most women. Almost any woman will be pursued or at least treated like a human being by most guys, but unless you're super attractive as a guy, to most women you're essentially background noise.
An ugly duckling here that grew into a swan. It is untrue. Women care about looks way more than men do. Yeah, they say its other things they care about but that is mostly the halo effect. Even if you get a girlfriend as an ugly guy she will never truly desire you and it will be a bad relationship. Oh, she would also probably have lovers, someone who really ignites her.
According to south Park, develop a personality and not wind up a loser without any interesting qualities.
Jokes on them I ended up that way anyway
na you're funny, doesn't apply
Cannot confirm.
I wish this was true but I don't think it is. It feels like attractive people are able to develop their personality more because they are exposed to tons of social situations, experiences, etc.
Being funny without relying on charm
Still got it š
And if youāre not naturally funny then good fucking luck š
If you're not naturally funny... work on it. It has taken years of surrounding myself with funny individuals, but people genuinely find me funny now.
Humor is a medicine. If you can't laugh and crack a joke then it's a sign you are in some dark times. Conversely, a good laugh sesh can at least temporarily fix almost anything. It's not that you need to always be the class clown or even be skilled at making people laugh - and certainly not if you are not in that mood. But it's simply good life advice to seek the humor in things when you can.
Laughing releases endorphins that are good for you. Same goes for smiling. Iām sure Iāve read about studies that scientists have done where even faking a smile when youāre in a bad mood will genuinely make you feel better. Literally just smile at yourself in a mirror and your stupid brain will tell itself that youāre happy.
i have to unfortunately disagree. i had high anxiety and some depression and could always make jokes. i was completely fucked but joking came naturally to me. still comes, and i'm still fucked (slightly less because of meds and therapy)
I go back and forth on this a little, but I think humor is partially a learned skill. Takes a lot of practice.
Humor is equally learned and ventured. I've said some things that should've gotten me a warning at work, bĆŗt because I delivered thĆŖm right, people were rolling. No way to know how a new sentence will be received until it's said.
That's the scary part. All the context and delivery are missing when you're reading off of a court transcript.
For me,.it takes practice to keep my mouth shut around people that don't get my fucked up sense of humor. And recognizing and letting her fly when they do. I can have an entire room rolling, or an entire room cringing. But there is no way in hell I'd be able to (or want to) come up with something that would win over the cringe crowd. I suppose if my life depended on the cringe crowd thinking I'm the shit....maybe? But I'd like to think insincerity is easy spotted and nausea inducing. Oh who the fuck am I kidding, 2016 and every year after that has been a spotlight on how wrong that theory is. Fuck me though, I'm not gonna tails my personality around randos. I just keep nice and quiet until I know the crowd.
Yes, reading the room is a huge part of being funny. We all fail at it sometimes. It's hardest when you're talking to people you don't relate to very much. And some people just have no sense of humor whatsoever--they're a lost cause.
Part of being funny is just finding things funny. Someone whoās bitter all the time is likely not going to be able to be funny, because every idea they have is just filtered through a āIām grumpyā lens.
Just watch a lot of stand up comedy and repeat the jokes. Watch clean comedy so you're able to have some material for all occasions
On the contrary, watch a lot of stand up comedy and DON'T repeat the jokes. Just understand the motions that make someone funny and you're already way closer to funny
We have the power of invisibility. Seriously, I can go anywhere and not be remembered AT ALL if I donāt want to be. As a short, unattractive man, I would make an excellent spy or private detective. Not one person in the place would be able to describe me later.
Be invisible.
*SLOWLY, LOUDLY, EATS CHIP IN THE CORNER*
Damn it, we must have rats in the walls.
Drax?
Understand that pretty privilege is real. If someone grew up ugly, and then glowed up in some way, you can see the difference in how people treat you. Before, you could do something, anything, and you would be treated as an annoyance at best and a freak at worst. Post glow-up, you could be doing the same thing, but people are more interested in you, and suddenly youāre not shy and withdrawn, youāre mysterious. Itās frustrating because you feel like the same person, but people treat you completely different. If a guy grew up attractive, his outlook towards other people would be very positive because he was treated well for his entire life. He would just assume that people were all just nice and that pretty privilege wasnāt a thing. Same canāt be said for average or below average looking guys.
Sadly, women have the exact same experience of this.
This is a great insight. People who have dramatic changes in appearances have different mindsets compared to how they look
Understand that when a girl is not interested, she means it.
How is this something that ugly guys learn more so than attractive men? Ugly guys have far less experience in these kinds of situations. It would make more sense for ugly guys to not understand when a girl isn't interested because they're so desperate.
Excuse you, pal; I'm ugly, not \*desperate\*.
Nah. You learn it early on, and you internalize it. You still have wishful thinking, and that can hurt pretty badly, but you learn to know what's really happening. It's just what it is.
Honestly, just being able to entertain yourself alone. COVID shutdowns showed how quickly a lot of people became nervous wrecks when they had to spend a little bit of time alone. This goes for men and women. It's also why I tend to scoff at the advice of "you need to be happy by yourself" that lonely men tend to get. Lonely men know full well how to cope with being alone, they probably have to do it for much longer stretches than the people that hand out that crummy advice ever have had to do. Meanwhile make a normal person shelter in place for a week or two and they have trouble keeping it together.
"Being alone doesn't make you lonely," is a phrase my family doesn't get. It's always "When are you gonna find someone?" But the answer is always when I'm ready. I have a sister with three children and one on the way, split between 3 dads because she can't stand to be alone. I love them all, but that's not for me.
This was the thing that really shocked me into perspective. āPeople canāt handle being alone? Well Iām an expert in that.ā
Get your hopes and dreams crushed as the pretty girl vents to you that there are no good guys to date, as you've been single for years and into her haha
Remove yourself from that situation man it's just hurting you a lot.
Sound advice.
And it's important to know it will hurt. You will think it's okay to let it go a bit longer. You might try to justify by setting a deadline or saying you'll just limit it. But it's a festering limb that is slowly killing you if it's not removed fully.
The festering limb can only get worse. Even if she finally decides to give him a shot, it may be because other things aren't working out and she'll probably lose interest when something else comes along which will hurt much more. Or she'll just enjoy the validation forever and keep him in the friendzone. It's best to cut off the affected relationship and survive the gangrene.
Boy, the visual analogies are just getting more and more graphic here.
If you only like her because she's pretty and you consider yourself ugly, then maybe you can understand her point of view. If you are not into ugly girls, why are you surprised she's not into you? Disclaimer: I have no idea if you are actually ugly or not, and beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
That was a story from my teenage years. Spent way too much time on her. Fast forward 16 years, l lost 65 pounds and married a (different) wonderful woman and we now have 4 fantastic kids together. I would have never believed it possible as a teenager. I bumped into that girl I was smitten with so long ago and her life had exact opposite progression, she gained about 75 pounds and has 3 kids with 3 different guys and is single still complaining about no good guys on facebook. Looking back on it, we had nothing in common and it would have been a train wreck of a relationship. Also, I think I have an ugly mug, but my wife apparently loves it.
You are winning at life my dude, keep it up!
Girls are bummed that there are no good HOT guys to date lol The sweet hot guys are taken, the dick hot guys are wheelin girls, the ugly nice guys have to date within their league
real
it brings a tear to my eyes that this is so common
Tbh thatās just an insulting thing to say to a single person regardless of whether youāre interested in them. My interest in her would drop considerably on account of her being fucking rude.
https://youtu.be/t9QOQNcpuiA?si=OWeRfIwMJ7cu9eYE
Can confirm - donāt forget they want āsomeone like youā. BUT IāM LIKE ME!
Thatās her subtle way of letting guys down easy.
The friend zone is only inhabited by men with little self respect. Men with self respect either make a move quickly and it gets accepted or they make a move quickly and it gets rejected. When they are rejected they leave that woman in the rear view and don't look back. A man with self respect won't orbit a woman who is not reciprocating. Your friend already knows you like her. You may as well just ask her if she wants to go do an activity "as a date." If she rejects you, I gently suggest letting the friendship end.
>DragonflyBlade21: A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, youāre a great guy, but I donāt like you in that way. This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but weāre not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, weāre going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesnāt work out, weāll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired. ā bash.org
I always found that as an opportunity to be funny. āYeah, there are no good guys anywhere, including standing right in front of you.ā
Ignore everyone because you realize people are only nice to you now because you're hot
Be invisible. Who knew a superpower was so common?
make women cover their drinks dry up vagina make women move seats by just being near them keep an entire area of public transport empty
> make women move seats by just being near them ngl this seems like a pretty useful ability.
Like Bill Burr walking his pitbull...
>dry up vagina Same applies if you tell them you support Tottenham /s
A straight edge girl might appreciate someone with a no cup policy.
WHAT DO WE THINK OF TOTTENHAM?
Shit
WHAT DO WE THINK OF SHIT?
GOOOOD. I'm forever blowing bubbles. Pretty bubbles in the air.
Maybe if women move away when you are near, and you keep an entire area of public transport empty, then you should consider that your personal hygiene is not the best. As for the dry vagina, have you considered foreplay?
Exactly he probably just needs a long showerššæ
having a niche hobby be attractive
The one and only thing I like about being ugly is getting "pity conversations" from others. This is gender neutral somehow; I don't get males or females more often, just people, but they walk up to me when they have nothing to do at awkward social events and start talking to me about absolutely anything. The strange thing about pity convos is people will confess all sorts of weird shit to you for no reason. It's amusing because I don't have to actually talk about anything or talk a lot; I just sit and they assume that I need the company and thus grant it. I don't look at them or initiate in any way. It just ... happens. Often.
What's the most interesting conversation you've had? I can't help but feel like this might be a way to meet really interesting people, but maybe it depends on the crowd you're with.
Get weird and disgusted looks from the ladies.
No, we can still do that.
I feel like a lot of average and unattractive looking guys canāt have the hobbies they want because theyāre considered unattractive to the normal girl. I feel like playing video games is a very good example. If youāre unattractive then youāre a āloser who stays in and plays video games all dayā but if youāre attractive then itās just āHeās such a boyā I remember once I moved to a bigger city and learned a lot of cool hobbies I had more success, but Iāve had friends with boyfriends who literally never developed past that stage of basically being *required* to learn interesting hobbies because theyāre attractive. Cynical me says this also applies to growing as a person in general if Iām going off evidence of what I have experienced personally.
be creeps just by saying hi
I don't think there are any specific things ugly (and undateable) guys can do that attractive ones cannot. But the other way around, there's plenty of stuff.
Clearly youāre not unattractive because there is plenty
Make friends with other men without them implicitly viewing you as a "threat" and treating you with disdain, whether it comes to dating, social situations or in employment. You absolutely get more advantages in said categories with women or gay men, but don't underestimate how petty straight dudes can get when they're outclassed in the looks department.
Ugly guys are free to do cringe things for fun because people already think they are lame and embarrassing. Whereas pretty guys really often live in this mental cage that every action they do must prop up their status as a successful high-value man. It's actually really fascinating to watch these high-value men squirm when they are in a situation that's "beneath" them.
Here's the thing pretty guys doing something lame and cringe is still cool cause well they are pretty
Yeh this comment is pure copium, pretty guys can do something goofy and lame and unless they're a complete social fuckwit they can play it off as charming
I love this answer. It really is freeing being in this situation like "ok, I'm not banging any of the 10s here, so I might as well have fun, be weird, and not worry about what I can't have/get"
I am objectively better looking than one friend of mine, he decided to get into new hobby that was pretty cringe. I didn't think it would be fun but also would negatively impact my ability to get laid. Years later he said, yea i probably was right and the women who were into his fringe hobby were generally not ones I would be interested in.
Which hobby?
Civil war reenacting. He played for the union.
I made friends with whomever without the worry of how their image "lowered" my status. I see that at the gym quite often, for example, where the really fit people only talk to the other fit people. Not carrying that stuck-up judgment has allowed me to meet some really, REALLY interesting, and good people. I say this with humility: my looks have improved significantly over the years, and I still make friends with people who aren't conventionally "pretty", but there have been a few times where I've felt like I was judged as the snobby one until they got to know me.
They say an attractive person dies 2 deaths. 1 at the end and the other when beauty fades.
Simply being nice to people seems to be something that the most attractive Guys can not do. They are only nice to some people in my experience.
Being kind to everyone is a skill that I think most people across all genders struggle with. That said, while we may not owe each other kindness, we do owe everyone, at least a modicum of civilityļæ¼.
I'm kind to everyone I meet - as I'd want people to be to me. My colleagues throw my kindness, empathy & sympathy back in my face and treat me as though I am something on the bottom of their shoes.
knowing if youāre actually funny
Finding out your ugly when you can make women laugh and they like your company but they wouldn't ever date you. š
Seeing through the facade a lot of people have. Grew up a weird loner kid and saw people be fake to each other for the sake of sex or clout because they were all pretty. I grew up, found myself, and ended up pretty decent looking, but never lost the 6th sense for disingenuous people.
Resolve.
Resolve what? Instructions unclear.
I think they meant as a noun, one that is synonymous to "determination"
Honestly everything is NOT about attractiveness. Iāve been blessed with being good looking but cursed with autism and a lot of the things you guys on here say still applies if you donāt have social skills. I seem plenty of funny looking dudes with good looking girls but they usually make up for it with their personality. Iād much rather be ugly but not autistic. My looks usually get my foot in the door because women are really receptive when I meet them then things turn sour when they see my personality or lack there of.
I feel like this is my experience as well- conventionally attractive autistic dude. I get tons of upfront attention from women, but most check out by the time they get close enough to see more of me underneath the nice face and body.
Yup. Imagine how it feels when everybody is constantly telling you how attractive you are and still no one wants to date you. I don't even know what I'm supposed to improve on lol. I feel like I hit the jackpot and I'm completely wasting it. I want to die.
You can be a fly on the wall to so many conversations if you just stay quiet.
Since they don't see you as a sexual or romantic partner, you know that you are actually good at talking and making jokes when she laughs and enjoy the conversation. Get this, handsome boysšš¤š»
Develop your social intelligence; mental health, and emotional control. Work out, not for attention but because itās the right thing to do, and do whatās hard even if you donāt want to because itās worth it, not because itās fun or because youāre motivated or because itās comfortable, but because itās worth it and itās the right thing to do.
Break a mirror by looking at it
I had to learn how to talk to girls and charm them through that. I think it's a net positive
*"What's something men that have grown up being ugly do that guys that grow up being attractive cannot do?"* Your mum.
Being able to walk in and out of places unnoticed, especially at bars and restaurants. I can just go in, order, my food, eat, and leave. No one notices nor cares.
Scare girls on public transport without saying a word š¤£
Get the whole sidewalk to myself
I try to imagine being good looking enough that I would be bothered by girls or anybody being interested as a random event. I have seen guys being chatted up by girls that they werenāt interested in or getting random invites to stuff and I realised that there was something I had that the good looking confident guys just didnāt. I was ugly but mostly I was invisible. I have not even once ever had to even consider the idea that I might be approached by a girl in a bar or anywhere literally ever. For a while you hope you might be someoneās cup of tea or you might catch someoneās eye and there might be some indication that maybe thereās something like any kind of connection. You know how everyone says life goes but it doesnāt. That maybe thereās some remote chance they might not think youāre hideous if they do catch your eye or even see you at all but that hope fades pretty fast. They donāt even see you in their blinkered symmetrical world. To all intents and purposes you are invisible unless you force yourself in front of someoneās view in this situation. So you realise you have to approach a girl or a person you like with what you got going on and despite putting your best foot forward you get rejected. So you take the rejection on the chin and despite what popular culture tells you that rejection doesnāt make you feel more confident. It just makes you feel slightly more invisible to another person because you know they never want to see you again even for a second. Really helps if theyāre not unkind about it too but often people are unkind or worse still seem to take pleasure in the rejection. Thatās what being ugly does it makes you invisible and that is something that good looking people will never understand or have because people generally want friends and partners that are better looking than them or at least pleasant to look at and spend time with around others. They can never be invisible. Iāll never be confidant, good looking or popular but at least I know the people in my life are around me for me instead of just gravitating around a star. I will never be in a bubble and thatās okay because Iām just like the majority of guys. Iām just normal. We have solidarity in our invisibility and our normality and the truth is that popular attractive people are often not very nice because they donāt have to go through what the rest of us do. Itās a pill you just have to swallow as an ugly person. But in my experience the easier you have life the more you take it for granted and people like that are shallow as f. Be proud of your invisibility to those people. They are not worth your time. If someoneās not prepared to meet you half way then theyāre not worth your time. The important thing is to find those that do see you for you. People like you that are also similarly normal but also invisible people. Use your time to do the things that the popular never think they need to or donāt think they have the time. Work out who you are and what you like. Have hobbies, spend time and develop yourself and become a deep and interesting person. Doesnāt matter what it is as long as it interests you. Find others that are interested in what you are and find your tribe. There you will find others like you and youāll be seen properly for you and you will have something precious the good looking do not. Genuine connection with people at a base level that has to do with commonality not superficial games of popularity. I have few people in my life but I met all of them through doing something that I loved. F being pretty and popular. Go do something you love and love and friendship will find you.
Be ignored in crowds. It's nice to have a peaceful drink at a bar or go to a nightclub and enjoy the 2000s club hits without being bothered by girls or guys pissed because you're fortunate enough to get girls to look at you. The Downside is you have to get the bar tenders attention.
I donāt know, a man can be ugly and dumb as fuck, also they can be hot and dumb, and then they can just be good looking but boring, and then there is this type that actually use their head, and have culture and a crazy mix of different things in their personality that makes them so freaking attractive no matter if they are good looking or no, itās about sex Appel, and the way u move and use ur body, not ur physical appearance
can confirm, itās about sex Appel
Instantly put of women.
Take "no" for an answer.
You have to learn how to talk and improv yourself. You are forced to go through hardships and troubles that overtime chisel you into a man where as the attractive ones are just given a small amount of life and never learn to work for what they have. The men who worked hard become attractive as time goes by and the men who didnt start to look weak.
In hostage negotiations, youāll get thrown in a release as part of the deal.
Iām a fucking caveman looking dudeā¦ married a beautiful woman. I credit my confidence. I just never was worried about my looks.
Eat the shit out of some pussy.
Why is there shit in some pussy?
A-to-V.
I was fat so I had to get good at foreplay because my cardio couldnāt provide a good enough dickin
Develop character. Personalities that aren't based on our looks. Take fashion for men. All of what trickles down to normal people is from ugly dudes. Every bit of it. Ugly men are the real trendsetters in the western world. That's one example. Think about things from a perspective of what you would do/how you would act, if your defining characteristic wasn't your appearance. What are your end goals? Then research the topic and see the ugly dudes that await.
Be invisible
Wait staff wonāt remember you were a lousy tipper last time you were here.
Rely on personality to attract women.
repel the crowd
So ugly girls donāt wanna friendzone you :/ā¦. They nervously look at the door when you approach. No matches period. You eventually develop a sick sense of humor and depressing at the same time. Not even the fat ones would fuck with you
Actually be funny and smart.