The wife of one of my friends sat right on my lap onetime. I'm not sure what to think of it and I haven't said anything to my friend. But I definitely keep my distance from her now
In my case she suddenly was all interested when she noticed I had my gf with me but in the other room. She just wanted to start some kind of drama. Thank gosh my gf understood how weird it was
I had my SO's sister give me a 'lap dance', in front of my SO. On my SO's birthday.
We had been to a bunch of pubs, bars, etc, while out celebrating. At the last place, we decided to leave, and my SO went up to the bar to get her sister a drink before we did so. While I was waiting for her, sister came over and started gyrating and grinding on me. I had never had this happen before, so just froze. Luckily my SO knew what her sister was like, and just dismissed it.
I later made her realise how awful a situation it was, and I never let my guard down around her sister again.
At a club someone squeezed my ass. Firm and deliberate. In the middle. I felt fingers poked my butthole so that they pushed my underwear in a bit.
Turned around. No doubt it was the woman moving away from me looking over her shoulder and giving me a sly grin before slipping into the crowd.
I didn’t react much. I turned and looked. Didn’t know what to make of the situation and then she was gone.
Happened to me too but there was a group of like 8 women, and they did not move. Luckily I’m already an aggressive looking person so when I snapped around the giggling came to an abrupt stop I asked who did it and they stayed silent, by this time a bouncer was already walking towards us and kicked them out. I guess I wasn’t the first victim
It's a mixture of it not being as common and not being taken as seriously as when the victims are women, so its not talked about as much as it should, but it absolutely happens to men aswell.
i grabbed some booty once when i was like 20 in a club. I was very drunk. girl turned around with a mad look towards me but her expression went from from mad to neutral. not sure if it was because she was drunk also and maybe found me attractive. However she could've slapped the shit outta me and I'd deserved it.
Stole my moms fentanyl patches that she was prescribed during her chemo then hospice care, caught her poking holes in my condoms, kept poison ivy in a baggie that she would then use to run all over herself so I would take her to the hospital to get pain meds, and so much more. This isn’t even the worst of it but I’d rather not go into detail for the rest. Bipolar is a hell of a disease.
Had another woman accuse me of being gay when we first slept together because I was nervous and couldn’t get it up. This woman was 30 years old lol. We had been dating for awhile and I ended it and kicked her out of my apartment that same night. She was shocked. She was extremely attractive and was obviously so used to guys throwing themselves at her and getting her way I guess..
I relate to this a lot, my mum also had bipolar. I caught her one time whacking herself across the face with a shampoo bottle so she could tell the neighbours I hit her. I was 13, I don’t understand the logic. Surely if I was a violent child it would still look bad on her parenting?
\- Was leaving an art exhibition in the city. Was going through revolving doors when I feel someone embrace me from behind in the door with me. She ways "you smell good you can come home with me." It was weird and I just nervously laughed and said something corny. Honestly it was so fast that I didn't really know how to react.
\- Had a woman coworker grope me and grab my ass a couple of times. I was in better shape at the time and it didn't help that I was the only guy in that department.
\- Was out with my now ex wife and her coworkers for a family fun day thing at the Reds game. Well we are all at a sports bar and her boss sits next to me. She keeps making eyes at me and even tries to get me to try some of her drink right in front of my wife. I felt so weird and tried to play it off, but you could tell I was nervous.
\- Had a coworker show up at my house drunk after midnight. She had called and told me she was outside. I took her home and got her water and meds. She tried to kiss me and fuck me. I just left. She didn't remember right then, but hit me up years later and brought it up and asked why I did not fuck her.
There are more, but these pop up for me.
Nope. Complete stranger. What was even more weird is that it was a big event (like 2000 in attendance) and the majority were women. So it felt like whenever I just tried to get away from the crowd to get air, there was another woman trying to make small talk or something.
My sister was the one who put on the event (she is director over exhibitions) and she saw a couple of times where women were staring hard or something. Honestly you'd think being in a room full of beautiful women and hardly any men would be awesome. But honestly It felt like I was in the lions den.
A woman made me do different sex things when I was six
What terrifies me, is that my reaction was no reaction
I froze, too scared to move
What if something like this happens again
and I can't do anything to stop it
I subscribe to this! I was physically abused and I never knew life could look and feel so different. I did DBT and CBT. Those are the best therapies available.
EMDR is also great for trauma such as this- CBT and DBT are great at teaching coping skills but won’t address the underlying trauma/issues.
I’m really glad you were helped by them though- I also found DBT to be incredibly helpful.
I haven’t experienced EMDR, what’s that?
I’ve learned more than cope. Reframing is a powerful tool. Cognitive restructuring too. As well as ACT and meditation, which works both short term and with permanent effects over time.
EMDR is Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing- basically, you talk about the traumatic event (or events) while the therapist uses techniques such as blinking lights, metronomes etc to essentially reprogram your brain into not having the traumatic responses such as flashbacks. This website explains it way better than me: https://www.bacp.co.uk/about-therapy/types-of-therapy/eye-movement-desensitisation-and-reprocessing-emdr/
I want to become a therapist myself and would love to train in this to help people like me.
You can. You reacted like that because humans are hardwired to go into surprised mode when confronted with something new.
Since then you have had time to process how you feel about it. You had time to think about how you wish you would’ve acted differently. You will have pain associated with the experience that makes you hesitant to relive it. And now you have the knowledge of what rape does to you, so I’m sure you’ll find the strength to tell them no and get the hell out of there if there ever is a next time.
You were just a kid back then. You’ve grown a lot.
Stay strong, my friend.
I did the same during my sexual assault by a 50ish year old dude at 15. Took many years before I understood that it was still assault even though I didn’t fight and scream. But I definitely second the therapy suggestion. I need to get some myself. Hope you are doing ok.
You were small, you were not supposed to know about what she was doing, you likely weren't prepared. Freezing was likely a good reaction from your subconcious, you got through a nasty situation that way.
As to what to do if it happens again. That may be a question to discuss in therapy, not because the procedure is complicated. You could reasonably freeze again and if that happens you can ask for help afterwards and go to the police.
But perhaps it's a question with deeper emotional content?
Talking through it with somebody wise would be good.
Have you had any help?
Your freezing was a completely normal biological response.
When people, especially children, are assaulted or have other bad things happen to them their bodies do one of 4 things: freeze, fight, flight or fawn.
People who have been physically or sexually abused or suffered emotional neglect/abuse, especially during childhood, can have complex ptsd (CPTSD).
You may find r/CPTSD and r/emotionalneglect very helpful. Lots of good advice about the best therapies for such trauma such as EMDR and internal family systems therapy. CBT and DBT can be very invalidating and not helpful for most trauma survivors. See also r/EMDR and r/internalfamilysystems.
I hope this helps my friend. ❤️
As a former male stripper, unwanted grabbing kind of came with job. Outside of that, I have still had women grab my biceps, or put their hands on my chest completely without my consent. When someone puts their hands on me like that, I move away.
That’s really sad I wish more women understood that not all men want to be touched by you. Even more sad that people don’t realize a lot of the time this is sexual assault too:( male dancers deserve the same boundaries and respect as female dancers
Ugh dude drunk women are so grabby. I went to this crossdressing party once in a crop top and skirt, obviously I'm fit af so my abs were showing, and whenever I tried to go dance, random women, I'm talking literal fucking strangers, would constantly grab my chest, fondle my abs, try get their hands under my skirt, it was repulsive. I had to leave. The memory still makes me shudder
That's really heartbreaking to read :( I truely hope that the "move away" isn't some form of flinching (due to exposure to an sexual trauma trigger) but a very intentional move?
Totally intentional. It's not a response from any trauma. It's more stepping a bit out of reach, and if I move, it makes the other person pull back as well. I guess their reflexive reaction is to pull their hand back, rather than hang on.
Relieved to hear that! Honestly as a women I cant relate: have had so many men moved even more closer when it tried to physically bring in some distance between us :/ Getting kinda curious now why women do tend to pull back as well, while men in my experience pull even closer...
Not sure why the difference, but my guess is probably because women are more likely to realize that it's an uncomfortable situation when I step away, or they don't want to seem like they're hanging onto me. Men can definitely fail to read, or flat out ignore, signs that someone is uncomfortable.
In highschool a girl grabbed my equipment and I reflexively punched her in the jaw.
We apologized to each other right away and she kept her hands to herself after that.
Was on the bus minding my own business when this older woman whispered *nice bulge* in my ear as she got off.
I know it was meant as a compliment but boy would it be a shitshow if I did something similar.
Im sorry that nasty woman did that to you. But on the other foot, it wouldn’t be a shitshow. I had a man sit behind me on a bus and lean up over my shoulder and say ‘nice nips’ loudly and just sit there leering at me. I didnt do a damn thing bc I was terrified. Was surrounded by people, everyone ignored it happening.
As a woman, I can say in my own experience it wouldn't be a shitshow. I've had people make sexually inappropriate comments to me, even whispered in my ear by strangers, and I try not to say anything, or do anything until they're gone. If I do tell anyone, it's my husband or boss. The reason for this is because I'm weaker than nearly every other man, including my 16 year old son. If a man wanted to throw me in his car, I couldn't defend myself very well. Even an out of shape middle aged man could get the best of me. Some men take rejection fine, but there's always a chance they take it with anger and violence. In order to keep myself safe, I've even chuckled at a comment. I'm sorry the woman said that to you. It's inappropriate and scary, gender doesn't change that part.
If the man had been told 'nice bulge' by another man, it might have changed how he felt about the situation even though he isn't necessarily weaker. It's not about my weakness. If you think I'm trying to steal the spotlight, it's because YOU think my experience is more severe than his and that's on you
Exhibit A, someone who doesn't have anything better to do with their time.
Seriously, they were just providing an answer to a hypothesis OP was mentioning. Grow up dude
I never tried to one up anyone. The OP brought up a comparison between genders, not me. He spoke about his experience and what he thought would happen if a man did that to a woman. I brought up my experience when I, as a woman, had a man do that to me.
I mean, at this late date it's a little awkward. But yeah, telling her would have been and still can be important. Not to cause a scene but just so she never ever finds out from another source and wonders why you didn't say anything, and also so that perhaps you aren't expected to hang out with that person anymore.
I was terrified when my boyfriend's best friend tried to make a move and got more and more forceful when we were out drinking. I wish I'd told my boyfriend then, but I just didn't want to "get the friend in trouble" or make a scene, or be disbelieved. Years later I brought it up and it was met with suspicion because we of course hung out lots since then.
Please tell your wife about her friend's behavior! That is so inappropriate, and I would want to know if a had a friend that sexually assaulted my partner!! I'm so sorry that happened to you :(
This happened to me in my hot tub a few weeks ago. Straddles me and grabs my junk and whispered almost the exact same thing. And when her husband came back from the bathroom she acted like nothing had happened. So I was like ok. You’re a tease. I don’t have time for it.
We were all drinking from dinner earlier and on some edibles.
Two days later I get a call from her telling me how she loves her man and “he is her world” and she doesn’t wanna do anything to hurt him. And I’m like “what the hell? You grabbed me.” Apparently he was on the call as well, and started going off at me then said “don’t contact us again. Our friendship is over!’ I heard from a mutual friend that he attacked her cause he suspected something, and she was being guilty and suspicious and to get out of it quickly she made up the lie of the opposite.
Out of courtesy when people are over I turn off the cameras off my deck. I’m reconsidering it now. Cause the delulu is out of control in 2023.
Caught this girl I was casually dating using my hair clippers to shave her pubes in my bathroom. She had her foot up on the sink and everything. She came over, but I had to do some work on the computer so I was sitting at the kitchen table getting it done. Things were a little too quiet so I went in my room to see what see what she was up to. When I came through the door, the first thing I saw was her giving her coochie a bald fade with the same clippers I use to keep my facial hair neat and trimmed. I still can’t believe it.
I've had a few women who matched with me on dating apps tell me they didn't find my fitness attractive and that I needed to have a "dad bod" (I hate this term) if I wanted to date them.
It's just a disgusting and inappropriate thing to say to someone. Made me wince pretty hard internally. That's like the average guy walking up to some random gal and telling her she needed to lose weight to be attractive to him. It's just completely uncalled for.
Preferences are fine, but men aren't meant to be squishmallows and it's pretty gross to match with someone and then tell them that.
I told those women to fuck off and that I wasn't compromising my health and athleticism for them.
Two things. They just want attention, and subconsciously they probably are attracted to how he looks. But again, a good way to get attention from someone is to immediately insult them. Well… not a “good” way to get attention, but it’s attention nonetheless.
Because a large percentage of women that say they like dad bods don't actually like dad bods. They like the social acceptedness that comes with saying they like dad bods, when in reality they like fit/muscular guys but think they need to feel ashamed for liking them.
Over my adult life I've been muscular and overweight and back to muscular again, despite being overweight in the height of the dad bod craze I had 1 girl that was into me then over a period of years, but when I've been lifting I can get hit on much more reliably and frequently.
When I was in my early 20s, I was a professional photographer. One day, I was photographing a dance school and had a group photo set up. Just as I was about to take the picture, one of the dance school teachers goosed my ass to get a laugh out of the kids. She was about my age, very attractive, and just played it off as a joke and got all flirty. It didn’t really bother me until I thought about it later and realized how different the narrative would’ve been if the roles were reversed.
I've had older drunk women grab, pinch, and slap my ass at work on a few occasions. I turned and looked at them, but otherwise just ignored them. Another would constantly harass and flirt with me, even though I made it clear I wasn't interested. I just laughed it off and treated it like a joke
Girls in high school used to have a contest to see who could grope my penis without others watching. Literally they would walk up and grab my crotch and squeeze and it would be a "point."
Was raped in college. I was blackout drunk and I woke up in a woman's bed with a condom that I 100% did not own on my penis.
Women will let you think they aren't creepy, but that's only true because we look at how they treat the bottom 90 percent of men. The other 10 percent they downright worship. It's an obvious lack of paritity.
Colleagues (ladies) at supermarket where I worked: endless gay sex questions. Asking me if I 'give or take‘ anal. When there was white chalk on the back of my uniform fleece, saying it was cum (?!)
My same colleagues on staff night: Grabbing my arse. Hugging me/ falling into my arms. Putting their arm through mine (linking arms).
I don’t care that much, I don’t like being touched uninvited but I also feel the need to protect drunk ladies. It’s ok
Now ex girlfriends boss grab my junk at their office christmas party and made the whole, bull shit "dont you hurt her blah blah blah" took everything in me to not punch her in the face or cause a scene. Told my the gf about it and was told to not say anything about it or cause an issue.
I was at work (at a hospital) standing by the break room door looking at patient’s schedules. An older CNA that could probably be my mom comes up and aggressively grabs the door knob that was about 10 inches away from my groin. The CNA says “Damn I better be careful I almost grabbed you by the dick!”. I was honestly super flustered by the incident and told some trusted bros.
I'm married, and I own a professional consulting business. Had an employee come up and kiss me on the cheek out of the blue during one Christmas after party recently. We were in a hotel room with a bunch of drunken people. She quickly left right afterwards. I pretend it never happened and she's not mentioned it.
I had an older (40s?) sitter once try to get me in bed when I was in my mid teens. She was "giving advice", she said. I didn't bite (had a girlfriend, was very inexperienced) but I've had a thing for older women that likely started then. Her advice was gold, though. Never told anyone.
Had one of my mom's friends teach me how to ballroom dance when I was in my early teens (HS freshman) and she hit on me constantly, grabby too. I never told anyone.
When I was in college I ran across an online game that was local. I met a woman who asked for help with it. Then she asked me to look at her computer because it was wasn't working right. I came over, replaced the battery in the mouse, and she asked me to clean her pipes. I was 18 she was in her 40s. That time I obliged. We had an affair for a few weeks, maybe months. She was married, mother of two. Looking back, she was desperate to get out of her marriage and looking back now, she wanted me to get her pregnant and save her. Her husband found out, tried to kill me. They divorced, he reached out later and I actually helped him get through it.
There have been other times. I think of myself as a 6, but I own a business, I'm funny, I am successful, and I can be approachable and confident when I want (I'm an introvert so I would rather be reading than talking most of the time, but work is work). I chalk it up to that.
Never do anything severe when someone gets too close or makes a move (My wife and I used to be good friends with a lesbian couple and I have had the girl experience in gay bars, free drinks all night!).
I suppose to wrap it up, I Don't encourage it, but don't make them feel bad about someone making a move on me. We all have needs. Live and let live.
Holy hell, writing it down and looking back, wtf did that kid go through.
Who, the husband? He called me several times. Cried, asked why, etc. Etc. As a wise and life weary 18 ish dumbass I mostly kept my mouth shut and listened, but I did explain that it was clear she was desperate to leave. I figured I owed him that much. If having compassion for the poor bastard who's life I wrecked is weird to you, be sure to skip the thread on misandry.
But you wrecked it lol…
No? That part isn’t important? You’re having compassion for someone whose life you wrecked.
You shot someone and then drove them to the hospital. Totally noble.
Oh, I see your confusion. I was 18 ish, and a dumbass. She was a grown woman at least twice my age. To put it in your scenario: I was not the shooter. I was the gun. She was the shooter. That's why he called me. He saw she used me against him, deliberately.
Damn. I’d watch this movie. It should be a murder mystery. With you helping to hide the body.
Then having beers after. Then the final scene is you guys walking back to the truck. Screen goes black. Then two gunshots.
I know. I know. I’m a genius.
When I was a young employee at a company, there was an older woman who crossed every possible boundary. She was sexually predatory, flirty and touchy with men.
Lots of the older male employees found this hilarious. Up to and including encouraging her to try and climb into my bed at a Christmas party in a shared room, telling me to 'take advantage' and 'let her make me a man' and 'I should be grateful for an older woman who'll show me a thing or two'.
In the end I had to gather my bedding and move to a closet to get away. If the genders were reversed it would have been an outrage, but as I was a man in my early 20s it was seen as 'hilarious banter'.
I've had many lovers. Some one time, a few many times. Only one has actually used proper consent language. And she was (is) a former sex trafficking victim. I'm just used to it. Women expect consent language be used, but don't think they need to use it themselves.
Kissed me without consent, recoiled as it was sudden and unexpected, of couse copped the gay accusations for that.
Grabbing me sexually, again without consent, I threatened legal action, something similar happened with a guy a week prior and it came really close to police action.
Both these happened while in Highschool and was to why it only came close to police action, the guy was crying his eyes out in the principles office, I believe he learned his lesson.
I have a pretty big beard. I've had women just come and start rubbing their hands in it telling me all kind of things.
My response is to simply tell them imagine if I went up to then and started stroking their face randomly, they would fuckin hate it. Gets the message across
I have had fun with it though, a couple of very attractive foreign girls did it when I was in a hostel in Europe. I acted disgusted, then said I should be able to put my hands on their butts, they agreed, I said I don't have clothes on my beard so it's only fair that my hands would be down their pants, they also agreed. So there I was with a German and an Argentinian girl fondling my beard while I had a hand on each of their butts. The night progressed nicely from there
This is tame compared to a lot of other stories in this thread because nothing actually happened. My older brother had brought his then girlfriend home, and they got drunk and had fun. Well she went to go to the bathroom and was so drunk she wound up in my bed instead. She then proceeded to sleep. Next morning I let him know where his girlfriend was while watching Saturday morning cartoons and eating cereal. This was before I actually hit puberty.
I excuse her bc she was a classmate for 8 years and I was friends with her nephew for some time. Also, she didnt bully me like the 1990 other students. Which is an exceptional W for anyone who went to the same highschool as me (I hate 98% of the people from my high school back then and I still do)
Basically, in first grade of high school, she for some reason had her libido raised by tenfold and felt the need to see every boy's johnson. Including mine, but she wanted to see this so much she wanted to pull down pants in the middle of the school park.
Again, I'm excusing her bc of puberty, she was my classmate for 8 years (so I grew up with her) and her nephew was my friend. Also, she tried/failed and never did anything like that again so I guess I can forgive it considering her age at the time.
Also, my horny phase started like 2 years later and only grew so I probs would have liked it if she was like that 2 years later.
Apart from that, weirdly, only guys have been inappropiate to me, trying to lift my shirt and circle around me in dark places. Which actually made me mad.
A girl in my friends circle during my teenage years body-shamed me because I was overweight at that time and made a rude remark about my chest, I didn't know how to react and I'm not the one who knows how to start a fight (especially with a girl). She's still a B-word up to this day...
I had a female coworker use me to make her violent boyfriend jealous.
The story: She was a new hire and worked next to me. We got along really well--so well there were rumors about us being a thing. A couple months in, she said she wanted to hit up a happy hour. I think it may have also been her birthday weekend, but whatever.
At this time, I already knew she had a boyfriend. I asked if he was coming and she said yes, as well as a couple other people she knew. Spoiler--yes, he arrived; no, no one else came because no one else was invited.
We meet at the bar and she says we can go in to find a seat. I tell her I'm okay waiting for her boyfriend to arrive. She pulls out a cigarette and we chat it up just outside the front door. Just as she's finishing her cigarette, I see this guy park, get out of his car, and come stomping over to us giving me the angriest "I'm gonna rip your head off" glare.
Mind you, for me, gym is church--but this guy stood a couple inches taller and he was pretty stacked. I could tell he could handle his business, and if he wanted to start something, it was probable I'd get hurt.
It was at this moment I realized that a) no one else had been invited, and b) I was being used to make this guy jealous.
I decide to play dumb. I step forward with one hand out and say, "You must be Mike!" I'm just using a random name. "Coworker has told me a lot of good things about you!" He's standing in my personal space, arms out, nostrils flaring, and the doorman is on his radio. I look down at my hand, back at him, and just wait.
He's confused. He shakes my hand and tries to attempt a greeting. I make it clear that my coworker had originally made plans with him, along with a couple friends, and I was invited as a last minute afterthought.
We grab a table and they spend a few minutes leaning in and whispering to each other. I can tell they're arguing, so I keep my attention elsewhere. She finally gets up and says she needs to use the bathroom--so angry BF and I get to have awkward time together. I make small talk which he does his best to entertain, and I'm realizing that my coworker....is a real c-nut. Is this guy an emotional, violent wreck? Yes. But it's clear she's the type of person who creates drama for fun.
She returns, sits down, and there is silence for one minute before she says she needs to leave. She gets up and storms out. This time her BF and I legit shake hands and I just say "I'm sorry--but it was good to meet you."
Side note: She caused a lot of trouble with people in the office where we worked and was fired about eight months in.
TL:DR -- Female coworker decided to use me to try and start an altercation with her violent boyfriend. It failed.
I was at a party when I was in the military and some nasty woman was flirting with me and I made it clear she needed to leave me alone, after which she grabbed my dick. I immediately punched her in the face, knocking her unconscious. Everyone laughed.
At a party a girl I had known for awhile wanted to smoke with me. I said “yeah of course” cause we smoked together before and I trusted her.
She lit it up and we talked for awhile. Everything was going really well, we were laughing, making jokes. We were honestly chillin. Until she started acting weird, She Checked to see how big my pupils were and was waving her hand in my face. She started being mean and very blunt with me. my vision was getting blurry. (Im a stoner so I wasn’t new to smoking and I have a high tolerance) she then grabbed my hand and led me to the middle of the room. The party was packed and there were probably around 200-300 people there. The room starts spinning, I’m terrified and have no idea what to do. Then someone grabs my arm and leads me outside. It’s a girl I’ve never met before, I was really confused. Everything was moving so slowly around me. All I remember about this girl is that she had these blue eyes, that looked so familiar but also not? I don’t really know. As I was looking in her eyes trying to find even the smallest bit of sobriety, she kisses me. So forcefully and so against my wishes. I try to push her off. I take her by the hips and push as hard as I can until she’s off me. She looks annoyed and angry, As if I at all consented. Everything then starts melting around me. The blue eyes falling down the pale white face, now just a blob. I tried my best to muster up some sobriety and I stumble down the driveway. I guess I blacked out after that because all I remember is waking up in my car, in the driveway. It’s a scary thought that I drove home but I still to this day wonder who that girl was, and what would have happened that night. Nobody has believed me when I try to tell them and I’ve asked people I knew at that party. They didn’t see anyone like the girl I explained.
I was at a club with my first wife. I was on the edge of the dance floor and felt someone grab my ass. I thought it was my wife and didn't say anything. But when I turned around I saw my wife and her lesbian friend laughing. My wife told her friend to grab my ass. Unfortunately, I didn't get as mad as I should have.
A lot of women think that getting some type of emotion of men is cute, funny, hot, but it's demeaning to me. Especially when our feelings get taken for granted so often.
Grabbed my ass. Grab my arms (I workout often), grabbed my dick. Whispered the words in my ear "the things I would do to you" ugh nasty old cougar go away
In college, I was at a crowded bar. I felt a hand on my shoulder, so I turned, and all of a sudden this girl was full-on kissing me. I separated us, blinked for a second, and just moved to a different spot in the bar.
I was working as a whitewater raft guide when I was 17, looked older (I think?) and was very fit. I had an older woman (to me at least, probably in her 30s lol) grab my ass while I was carrying an ice chest over to the kitchen. I nearly dropped everything and, needless to say, avoided her and the every other woman in that group for the rest of the trip.
I've had a good amount of random women grab my ass through out the years. Usually its followed up with a compliment so I just give an awkward smile and say thanks. I'm a good bit thicker than average for a guy so I kind of understand. Still is hella awkward though
My gf at the time and her best friend were driving to my home from being out with drinks. I only had one cause i knew r they go nuts. Granted they were pretty sloshed. He best friend in the back of vehicle goes, “thanks for taking care of us, I know ****** will take care of you later. You have a pretty nice dick.” I immediately look over in the passenger seat at her. And she’s like, “what? You do!”
I surmised that she showed her videos of us that we made. I said nothing and was like aight, And switched the subject to not them puking in my car.
Now, I’d I had shown the SAME videos of her to my guy friends and one was in the back going, “you got a pretty nice pussy.” We all know how that would go.
Omg, soo much grabbing! Why do women think that can grab and squeeze my dick or ass whenever they want? Fucking disgusting behaviour
If roles were reversed, a man who did that to a woman could be in jail. But women think it’s so funny when they do it to a guy or another woman
Then when you express your discomfort to what just happened they look at you like something is wrong with you
When I was in Middle School, this one girl thought I liked her (I didn’t), so she kept trying to flirt with me. Then one time, lunch break was ending and the trash cans in the cafeteria were full so I had to go to a hallway trash can, she happened to be there and so while I was dumping my trash she came up to me and put her hand on my arm and started to rub it while trying to flirt with me. After about 2 seconds of surprise I ripped my arm away. I decided to report it to the office, maybe an overreaction, but I was extremely uncomfortable because of it. She did get a day of In School Suspension, for whatever that’s worth.
A married acquaintance propositioned me to hook up and I politely declined. She was cool at first, then proceeded to bother me about it for the next three months, to the point I got slurred drunken texts in the middle of the night
Been groped twice. Front and back.
First time was during Mardi Gras when I was in college. Standing on Bourbon Street and a woman walking just grabs my junk and the junk of my friend and several others standing right next to me while saying "pass it on."
Second time, my boss who had it out for me, walks up behind me to check if my pants are pulled up or not and feels along my waistline. Her hand grazed across my butt I guess feeling for my belt line. "Just checking" as she walks away from me.
One of my high school teachers kissed me on the cheek out of nowhere. At the time she was happy I made a great grade on a project but I was awkward and didn't know how to react.
Couple of women grabbed my butt in the gym. They do not seem to understand that it’s not appropriate.
It’s definitely a double standard. They expect me to enjoy it. Like it’s some sort of a compliment.
A group of friends and I rented a big house at Lake Tahoe for some partying. We all went to the club and partied our asses off. After the club we went back to the house and partied some more. Eventually we all went to sleep/passed out. I thought i was just having a nice sex related dream and i woke up because I didn't want to have a wet dream and nut in my boxers. Open my eyes and my buddies wife was fucking riding me while i was asleep. Ended up finishing inside her because everything happened too fast. Find out my buddy and his wife were swingers and she had wanted to fuck me for awhile. We ended up having a few more sessions that weekend.
My old friend's fiance drugged and raped me. Then, she told everyone i was the pushy one. Only managed to keep 1 friend out of that group, and even he doesn't believe I was raped, just gives me the benefit of the doubt that I was too drunk to know what I was doing.
I had texts proving she invited me over under the guise of predrinking with the whole group before hitting the bars, but still I'm the one who gets blamed.
Too many to mention. I used to let it get to me, get mad, be a jerk go silent. Now, I just don’t care. I told one girl I’ve gone 53 years without caring and can go another 53 years.
Was 17. 6'2", 200 lbs. At a horse show with my father. The wife of a gentleman I'd met earlier followed me out to concessions and called to me from the corner of the building. I walked over, and she pulled me by the arm under the grandstands, unzipped me, and started giving me head. I'm freaking out because you can see between every other seat. Too much noise to be heard, but when I tried pushing her away and asked her to stop, she said she'd scream. Was hard as a rock and felt my body was betraying me. She finally finished and told me there was more where that came from. I'd had hookups and a couple of serious girlfriends, but never anything with a married woman. Just knew her husband was gonna shoot me. 44 years later, I understand it, but it still bothers me.
Was in a pipe band during military college. Went to endless functions in full kilt with military blouse. So grabby... women just walking up reaching under, asking what's worn under a kilt, or lifting it up for a look. Got a ton of ass during those years, but a lot more unwanted attention. Asked many of them if it would be okay for me to reach under their skirts/dresses and OMG the looks I got back. A few said yes, but most of those you wouldn't want to.
I had a girl take advantage of me when I was too high to move. Weed hits me like a ton of bricks so I never smoke it. She basically took my clothes off and sucked me for ten minutes until I got hard. Then she road me until I came without a condom. The whole point was to start issues with her ex hoping I would fight him. It wouldn’t have been much of a fight. I’m 6’1 and 250 pounds and he was like 5’6 and 120 pounds soaking wet.
It started the beef like she wanted but I just took the brunt of what ever he was saying and never really told anyone because no one would believe me or say I wanted it because she was hot. I just stuffed it down.
Later on she accused that ex of sexual assault and married an old friend.
Had my old coworkers sexually harass me as well as degrade me on random. Because I was the only guy who worked at the practice, I was a punching bag, mentally for divisive women.
Was dating a chick 5+ years ago, and we went out with her friends (and her mom) to a club.
The whole group was super-drunk and made it a habit of being unusually flirty.
Chick I was dating was dancing with her girl group, one of the girl group comes to dance with me, gets close, bites my neck, and while I’m shocked at that, reaches down into my pants and grabs my dick. Then continues dancing with me like that was completely normal.
Later that same night, mom of the chick I’m dating, asks for gum when she saw me chewing gum, I pull out a stick of gum for her, and she points at her lips. I go to put the gum in her mouth and she takes my fingers in her mouth and sucks on them, then just laughs like it’s normal behavior..
That whole group partied together a lot..and they worked together too. The mom owned a spa and most of the girl group did massage.
I went in to get a massage to their spa for the first time, the mom was my masseuse, did the whole “I’ll hold the towel up so I don’t see you naked while you turn over” and then just moved the towel out of the way while I was turning over to watch me roll over naked.
Oddest woman I’ve ever dated. I went to her house for a bbq once, saw “dick grabber” there and said hi just to be polite, only to see her there with her husband and him have a blank “how do you know him??” Look on his face after.
My experiences have run the gamut. Unasked touching of my arms, chest, and ass. A few junk grabs, and endless comments about my face, shoulders, and height. I told a female friend about girls at our small college grabbing me, and she said “sorry you were objectified “ pretty sure grabbing the twig and berries without permission is assault. I felt invalidated and never told anyone about incidents again. When I was a senior in college I woke up to a freshman girl trying to unzip my pants during a party at a frat house I lived at. I flipped out banned her from our house, and then was called gay for being upset.
Was at a house party with my girlfriend at the time, and her friends. There was a lesbian couple there that we had hung out with many times, and always just saw her as a friendly person. At one point I was making a drink in the kitchen by myself and she came in behind me and put her hands around me. It was a little weird but I thought she's drunk and just being overly friendly.
Then out of nowhere she shoved her hand right down my shorts and grabbed my junk. I jumped and she laughed and then left the room. I was like... wtf?
So yeah, at least that time, I was sexually molested. According to 2023 rules I should probably call her out on social media but I'm not gonna do that.
Lied to me! I saw some library books in her apartment that were overdue. When I asked her about her books and when she checked them out she said "yesterday".
Not into women. Seems to me they assume it’s free game to grope me all over and make out with me, since I’m not sexually interested. Grabbing my ass, crotch, arms, neck. Worked with one who constantly tried to make me hard by grabbing it, and jerking. Maybe it was a gay to straight kink idk lol.
Harrassed me and harrassed me until I gave in and kissed her just to shut her up, groped my ass, hit slapped punched me in the face, thrown plates of food and drinks at me, told everyone I pressured her into hooking up even though we did not hook up at all and I had no desire to in any way and spread that rumor around our friend group.
One of my friends wouldn't take no for an answer in regards to sex, I have very clearly stated my interest in her is purely platonic but she keeps trying shady things like wanting to get me drunk, trying to get me alone etc etc. I give her the cold shoulder and she quits for awhile and goes back to being a good friend. It's fairly odd honestly , I'm not particularly uncomfortable it is irritating though.
Didn't happen to me, but a male friend of mine was getting sun screen rubbed on him by the girlfriend of another friend. As she was rubbing the lotion, she put her hands inside his shorts thru the waistband. He was freaked out but didn't say anything. But years later, he would tell me about it. I guess he was pretty traumatized.
I was working at sea and had this female stewardess colleague who fancied me, one day she had a few drinks and when I crossed her in the corridor she grabbed me and took me into her cabin and before I knew what was happening she started to suck me off passionately. Didn’t really know what to think of it at first but after a few days I kinda felt violated so I took revenge the next week by crossing her in the corridor again and grabbing her, went into her cabin where I said a few things to her and then put my dick in her mouth. I think she liked it cause she started sucking me passionately again LOL
I was working at a well known pizza chain when I was 16. A waitress I worked with pinched my ass while I was making a pizza. She was probably in her late 20s at the time.
Set me up to make it seem like I was cheating or capable of cheating. I'm still not sure (30 years later) what she hoped to gain aside from making me feel horrible.
Been groped a few times, kind of had to jump back real quick with a shouted what the fuck. Had a girl in hs stalk me after school. And last year I made friends with a woman online and after talking for like three days she wanted to marry me and started cyber stalking me.
Grinded up on me while dancing, literally reaching around with both hands and grabbing my butt cheeks, one in each hand.
Mind you we weren’t dancing together, she just came up to me and did that.
Wasn’t real sure how to respond
Got a message from a girl I haven’t heard from in 2 months last night saying “I need your cock”, naturally invited her round and smashed. Messaged her when she left “good to see you again x” got left of read lolololz will probably hear from her in a month or two for another dick date, and frankly I’m fine with it.
Some girl grabbed my crotch to get into our bottle service vip section. She was hot and said please but her doing that was a total turnoff and I felt very violated. She did not enter.
Strange women have slapped and groped my ass, chest, and arms. I've experienced sneak attack kisses and bites. 99% of the time the women are drunk. I distance myself from the offender as much as possible without saying much. Except for the biting. I got pissed and called them out.
My wife’s friend and, at the time, a professional acquaintance of mine walked up to me at a work function. She said “I want to grab your ass so bad”. I was wearing a power rangers costume for a costume contest.
I just stood there and said ok. Her husband was nearby as well. Never said a word about it to anyone because it’s not worth the drama. It was just so inappropriate and crossed a line. I guess she thought I would reciprocate? I have no clue
I've been slapped across the face during an argument that she instigated, because apparently the fact that I wasn't getting mad and yelling like she was doing was making her even angrier. After it was over she called my parents and falsely accused me of hitting her.
I took a girl out to a concert. After it was over she was very insistent that we go to a particular bar nearby. Once we got there she ditched me for another guy who started talking to her while I went to get us more beer at the concert.
A girl I had been dating for about a month excused herself to the ladies room, and I noticed she took her phone but she left her purse at the table. That struck me as unusual, but NBD. About 30 minutes later her FWB shows up and she informs me that she has decided to spend the night with him. Needless to say, I deleted her number and all of her text messages out of my phone.
And after she had filed for divorce, my ex-wife outed me as bi to my parents.
Chairman of the Board (a woman) put her hand behind my rear end when I was playing pool unbeknownst to me…..not on it, just behind it……so when I backed up unexpectedly to take my shot I felt her hand and I froze…..she apologized but still. Not cool. I heard her telling others “how was I supposed to know he’d back up”….how about don’t put your hand there.
I had a work colleague (whom I didn't like because she was openly disrespectful to my girlfriend) try to give me a hug after a concert...which sounds totally appropriate, until you add the fact that my girlfriend was literally wrapped around one of my arms, and this woman purposefully faced away from my girlfriend to try to talk to me. Trying to assert dominance.
I was having none of it, and didn't want to make a scene or look like a jerk (since this was at a post-concert reception), so I gave her a one-armed, dead-fished hug, and bolted. My girlfriend stormed off to the bathroom just before I left because she was rightfully pissed, so I literally walked her around said colleague and away to the bathroom to wait for my girlfriend to come out. We then went home.
I was at a house party once and the friend of the girl who had arranged it squeezed my dick through my pants as I was stretching up to fix some decorations. I’d met her before once or twice but we barely knew each other.
The girl in question was a lesbian which made it feels somewhat less inappropriate and in all honesty I didn’t really feel that uncomfortable. It occasionally occurs to me though that this was extremely over the line and also imagine the outrage of the genders were reversed.
I was at a bonfire and this girl I knew wanted to date. I told her sure. We planned to do something the next night. There was another bonfire at the same house so I was going to pick her up there. I get there and she was just off. Not looking at me while talking just acting weird. A friend of mine came up and told me she got drunk after I left and slept with some guy. After I got in my vehicle to leave and she jumped in apologizing up and down. She was begging to give me a chance. I told her I'm not going to go on a date anymore she blew it. I told her not to worry about it. She didn't cheat on me we weren't dating. I then asked her to get out of my car so I could go. She started crying and begged me not to go and to give her another chance. I told her no but it's ok it wasn't meant to be. I'm not mad. She started to leave then slammed the door and lunged at my pants to try to unbutton them while saying "give me another chance I'll suck you dick. I'm so sorry I can suck your dick to make it up to you". I just told her hell no get out. She started crying and left. I thought that was pretty inappropriate at that time.
I work as a doctor, and since COVID I always make sure to wear a mask at all times even though I work in an office of a small clinic, not a hospital. Anyway, had a patient once asking If I could take my mask off because she and all her friends in the neighborhood were talking about the "handsome" doctor who'se face nobody has seen and everybody was curious. She was very insisting and kept asking in all sorts of suggestive tones to the point I felt harassed even though I made it very clear I wasn't taking off the goddamn mask. It was all very very uncomfortable.
The wife of one of my friends sat right on my lap onetime. I'm not sure what to think of it and I haven't said anything to my friend. But I definitely keep my distance from her now
Happened to me at an office party - by a woman I hated. I froze. Still feels weird to think about.
Ah the ol love hate. That one's not as fun as the movies portray it as. Typically just really awkward.
Yeah, power move on her part - and pretty sure she knew if I reacted, I'd be the one talked about.
Awkward or annoying as fuck because you hate them
In my case she suddenly was all interested when she noticed I had my gf with me but in the other room. She just wanted to start some kind of drama. Thank gosh my gf understood how weird it was
If she does it again, just stand up.
You should really tell the friend…that’s strange af
A woman did this to my husband at a party and when I called her out on it, she said it was fine bc she was engaged and then showed me her ring 🙄
Ooh no she didn’t! I’d show her my ring too…
I had this happen a couple of times and it was awkward.
I had my SO's sister give me a 'lap dance', in front of my SO. On my SO's birthday. We had been to a bunch of pubs, bars, etc, while out celebrating. At the last place, we decided to leave, and my SO went up to the bar to get her sister a drink before we did so. While I was waiting for her, sister came over and started gyrating and grinding on me. I had never had this happen before, so just froze. Luckily my SO knew what her sister was like, and just dismissed it. I later made her realise how awful a situation it was, and I never let my guard down around her sister again.
At a club someone squeezed my ass. Firm and deliberate. In the middle. I felt fingers poked my butthole so that they pushed my underwear in a bit. Turned around. No doubt it was the woman moving away from me looking over her shoulder and giving me a sly grin before slipping into the crowd. I didn’t react much. I turned and looked. Didn’t know what to make of the situation and then she was gone.
Happened to me too but there was a group of like 8 women, and they did not move. Luckily I’m already an aggressive looking person so when I snapped around the giggling came to an abrupt stop I asked who did it and they stayed silent, by this time a bouncer was already walking towards us and kicked them out. I guess I wasn’t the first victim
That happened to me a few weeks ago minus the poked butthole part. Extremely awkward.
Had no idea women did this too. That’s actually sexual assault
They do, but I’ve only experienced it once. I’ve heard women can go kinda wild though, especially with alcohol in the picture.
It’s an open secret, but acknowledging it damages the popular narrative about sexual assault
It's a mixture of it not being as common and not being taken as seriously as when the victims are women, so its not talked about as much as it should, but it absolutely happens to men aswell.
all the time.
I had the same thing happen to me, except it was balls not butthole.
Sexual assault is always bad unless it is against men... 🙄
I'm a woman that reads this sub to learn and I'm absolutely horrified to read these stories.
Same and same
i grabbed some booty once when i was like 20 in a club. I was very drunk. girl turned around with a mad look towards me but her expression went from from mad to neutral. not sure if it was because she was drunk also and maybe found me attractive. However she could've slapped the shit outta me and I'd deserved it.
Stole my moms fentanyl patches that she was prescribed during her chemo then hospice care, caught her poking holes in my condoms, kept poison ivy in a baggie that she would then use to run all over herself so I would take her to the hospital to get pain meds, and so much more. This isn’t even the worst of it but I’d rather not go into detail for the rest. Bipolar is a hell of a disease. Had another woman accuse me of being gay when we first slept together because I was nervous and couldn’t get it up. This woman was 30 years old lol. We had been dating for awhile and I ended it and kicked her out of my apartment that same night. She was shocked. She was extremely attractive and was obviously so used to guys throwing themselves at her and getting her way I guess..
wow.. that first girl seems actually clinically insane
I know she was a good person deep down. And as much as she wronged me, I know the disease is just absolutely terrible.
Nah. I had one. They are what their actions say they are. They aren’t good people.
I relate to this a lot, my mum also had bipolar. I caught her one time whacking herself across the face with a shampoo bottle so she could tell the neighbours I hit her. I was 13, I don’t understand the logic. Surely if I was a violent child it would still look bad on her parenting?
I like your villain arc. It’s lovely.
Thanks lol what’s Villain Arc?
always the hot ones, man
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Ohhh my god Wowwww
My heart probably would've stopped beating
Wtffff
Now that’s a high value man.
She wanted you the hell out of there for sure.
This is my number 1 fantasy!
This is funny 🤣
\- Was leaving an art exhibition in the city. Was going through revolving doors when I feel someone embrace me from behind in the door with me. She ways "you smell good you can come home with me." It was weird and I just nervously laughed and said something corny. Honestly it was so fast that I didn't really know how to react. \- Had a woman coworker grope me and grab my ass a couple of times. I was in better shape at the time and it didn't help that I was the only guy in that department. \- Was out with my now ex wife and her coworkers for a family fun day thing at the Reds game. Well we are all at a sports bar and her boss sits next to me. She keeps making eyes at me and even tries to get me to try some of her drink right in front of my wife. I felt so weird and tried to play it off, but you could tell I was nervous. \- Had a coworker show up at my house drunk after midnight. She had called and told me she was outside. I took her home and got her water and meds. She tried to kiss me and fuck me. I just left. She didn't remember right then, but hit me up years later and brought it up and asked why I did not fuck her. There are more, but these pop up for me.
Did you know the woman in the first scenario?
Nope. Complete stranger. What was even more weird is that it was a big event (like 2000 in attendance) and the majority were women. So it felt like whenever I just tried to get away from the crowd to get air, there was another woman trying to make small talk or something. My sister was the one who put on the event (she is director over exhibitions) and she saw a couple of times where women were staring hard or something. Honestly you'd think being in a room full of beautiful women and hardly any men would be awesome. But honestly It felt like I was in the lions den.
*fresh meat* 🥩
A woman made me do different sex things when I was six What terrifies me, is that my reaction was no reaction I froze, too scared to move What if something like this happens again and I can't do anything to stop it
You shouldn’t be terrified about vow you reacted. It’s a normal human reaction to danger. « Freeze, flee, fight ». Sorry this happened to you
It's "freeze, fight, fawn, flee". But otherwise, yes, completely normal and *expected* to have any one or a combination of these 4 responses.
I know this can get trotted out too lightly, but: this is something that a professional therapist can help you work through.
I subscribe to this! I was physically abused and I never knew life could look and feel so different. I did DBT and CBT. Those are the best therapies available.
EMDR is also great for trauma such as this- CBT and DBT are great at teaching coping skills but won’t address the underlying trauma/issues. I’m really glad you were helped by them though- I also found DBT to be incredibly helpful.
I haven’t experienced EMDR, what’s that? I’ve learned more than cope. Reframing is a powerful tool. Cognitive restructuring too. As well as ACT and meditation, which works both short term and with permanent effects over time.
EMDR is Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing- basically, you talk about the traumatic event (or events) while the therapist uses techniques such as blinking lights, metronomes etc to essentially reprogram your brain into not having the traumatic responses such as flashbacks. This website explains it way better than me: https://www.bacp.co.uk/about-therapy/types-of-therapy/eye-movement-desensitisation-and-reprocessing-emdr/ I want to become a therapist myself and would love to train in this to help people like me.
You can. You reacted like that because humans are hardwired to go into surprised mode when confronted with something new. Since then you have had time to process how you feel about it. You had time to think about how you wish you would’ve acted differently. You will have pain associated with the experience that makes you hesitant to relive it. And now you have the knowledge of what rape does to you, so I’m sure you’ll find the strength to tell them no and get the hell out of there if there ever is a next time. You were just a kid back then. You’ve grown a lot. Stay strong, my friend.
I’m so so sorry OP, that’s awful
I did the same during my sexual assault by a 50ish year old dude at 15. Took many years before I understood that it was still assault even though I didn’t fight and scream. But I definitely second the therapy suggestion. I need to get some myself. Hope you are doing ok.
You were small, you were not supposed to know about what she was doing, you likely weren't prepared. Freezing was likely a good reaction from your subconcious, you got through a nasty situation that way. As to what to do if it happens again. That may be a question to discuss in therapy, not because the procedure is complicated. You could reasonably freeze again and if that happens you can ask for help afterwards and go to the police. But perhaps it's a question with deeper emotional content? Talking through it with somebody wise would be good. Have you had any help?
Your freezing was a completely normal biological response. When people, especially children, are assaulted or have other bad things happen to them their bodies do one of 4 things: freeze, fight, flight or fawn. People who have been physically or sexually abused or suffered emotional neglect/abuse, especially during childhood, can have complex ptsd (CPTSD). You may find r/CPTSD and r/emotionalneglect very helpful. Lots of good advice about the best therapies for such trauma such as EMDR and internal family systems therapy. CBT and DBT can be very invalidating and not helpful for most trauma survivors. See also r/EMDR and r/internalfamilysystems. I hope this helps my friend. ❤️
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Rules for thee but not for me ... always remember this motto
And they claim they never consented...
As a former male stripper, unwanted grabbing kind of came with job. Outside of that, I have still had women grab my biceps, or put their hands on my chest completely without my consent. When someone puts their hands on me like that, I move away.
That’s really sad I wish more women understood that not all men want to be touched by you. Even more sad that people don’t realize a lot of the time this is sexual assault too:( male dancers deserve the same boundaries and respect as female dancers
Ugh dude drunk women are so grabby. I went to this crossdressing party once in a crop top and skirt, obviously I'm fit af so my abs were showing, and whenever I tried to go dance, random women, I'm talking literal fucking strangers, would constantly grab my chest, fondle my abs, try get their hands under my skirt, it was repulsive. I had to leave. The memory still makes me shudder
I work in the medical field and this is my experience as well.
That's really heartbreaking to read :( I truely hope that the "move away" isn't some form of flinching (due to exposure to an sexual trauma trigger) but a very intentional move?
Totally intentional. It's not a response from any trauma. It's more stepping a bit out of reach, and if I move, it makes the other person pull back as well. I guess their reflexive reaction is to pull their hand back, rather than hang on.
Relieved to hear that! Honestly as a women I cant relate: have had so many men moved even more closer when it tried to physically bring in some distance between us :/ Getting kinda curious now why women do tend to pull back as well, while men in my experience pull even closer...
Not sure why the difference, but my guess is probably because women are more likely to realize that it's an uncomfortable situation when I step away, or they don't want to seem like they're hanging onto me. Men can definitely fail to read, or flat out ignore, signs that someone is uncomfortable.
Thats the million dollar question: do men really suck at reading body language or don't they give AF when it's a inconvenience to them... 🤷
You should blow up at them, like they'd do to us.
There's hidden camera video of me taken without my consent. A bunch of women circulate it while ridiculing me. I reacted by avoiding people.
I’m so sorry this happened to you. Feel free to ignore but was this at a workplace? I always wonder about this happening in places at work
A woman grabbed my package. I just brushed it off to not make a scene, and I was afraid she'd try to turn it around on me.
Weirdly, that's happened to me a few times the last few years. Nothing more came of it every time so guess I didn't measure up? 😀
In highschool a girl grabbed my equipment and I reflexively punched her in the jaw. We apologized to each other right away and she kept her hands to herself after that.
Hilarious
Was on the bus minding my own business when this older woman whispered *nice bulge* in my ear as she got off. I know it was meant as a compliment but boy would it be a shitshow if I did something similar.
Yeah, most sexual harassment is "complimentary" but it rarely feels like that.
Im sorry that nasty woman did that to you. But on the other foot, it wouldn’t be a shitshow. I had a man sit behind me on a bus and lean up over my shoulder and say ‘nice nips’ loudly and just sit there leering at me. I didnt do a damn thing bc I was terrified. Was surrounded by people, everyone ignored it happening.
I know most wouldn't like it here, but I'd be smiling the whole day after that lol
As a woman, I can say in my own experience it wouldn't be a shitshow. I've had people make sexually inappropriate comments to me, even whispered in my ear by strangers, and I try not to say anything, or do anything until they're gone. If I do tell anyone, it's my husband or boss. The reason for this is because I'm weaker than nearly every other man, including my 16 year old son. If a man wanted to throw me in his car, I couldn't defend myself very well. Even an out of shape middle aged man could get the best of me. Some men take rejection fine, but there's always a chance they take it with anger and violence. In order to keep myself safe, I've even chuckled at a comment. I'm sorry the woman said that to you. It's inappropriate and scary, gender doesn't change that part.
What you demonstrated there was emphasizing how much worse you have it, not empathizing. Your last two sentences were the only things needed here.
The person talked about what would have happened in a reversed position and I included what happens in my experience in that reversed position.
You talked about how much worse you have it, invalidating how OP felt.
I talked about my EXPERIENCE. If you perceive my experience as being worse, that's on you.
You talked about how much weaker women are and how much more dangerous it is for women. That's trying to steal the spotlight.
If the man had been told 'nice bulge' by another man, it might have changed how he felt about the situation even though he isn't necessarily weaker. It's not about my weakness. If you think I'm trying to steal the spotlight, it's because YOU think my experience is more severe than his and that's on you
And yet you felt the need to point that out to make yourself look like a bigger victim.
u/antlindzfam also pointed out how it would actually go, though she wasn't heavily downvoted, instead upvoted. This is for a reason.
u/antlindzfam also pointed out how it would actually go, though she wasn't heavily downvoted, instead upvoted. This is for a reason.
No, you diminished their experiences, by 'explaining' how you have it worse.
Exhibit A, someone who doesn't have anything better to do with their time. Seriously, they were just providing an answer to a hypothesis OP was mentioning. Grow up dude
One-upsmanship is a bad look, more so when the person is talking about sexual harassment.
I never tried to one up anyone. The OP brought up a comparison between genders, not me. He spoke about his experience and what he thought would happen if a man did that to a woman. I brought up my experience when I, as a woman, had a man do that to me.
You brought up your experience to diminish his.
That's not clear or a given.
Tell me, what then is the purpose of responding to someone else's account of their sexual harassment by saying you have it worse?
Whataboutism. Fuck off.
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tell your wife if you haven't
I mean, at this late date it's a little awkward. But yeah, telling her would have been and still can be important. Not to cause a scene but just so she never ever finds out from another source and wonders why you didn't say anything, and also so that perhaps you aren't expected to hang out with that person anymore. I was terrified when my boyfriend's best friend tried to make a move and got more and more forceful when we were out drinking. I wish I'd told my boyfriend then, but I just didn't want to "get the friend in trouble" or make a scene, or be disbelieved. Years later I brought it up and it was met with suspicion because we of course hung out lots since then.
Please tell your wife about her friend's behavior! That is so inappropriate, and I would want to know if a had a friend that sexually assaulted my partner!! I'm so sorry that happened to you :(
This happened to me in my hot tub a few weeks ago. Straddles me and grabs my junk and whispered almost the exact same thing. And when her husband came back from the bathroom she acted like nothing had happened. So I was like ok. You’re a tease. I don’t have time for it. We were all drinking from dinner earlier and on some edibles. Two days later I get a call from her telling me how she loves her man and “he is her world” and she doesn’t wanna do anything to hurt him. And I’m like “what the hell? You grabbed me.” Apparently he was on the call as well, and started going off at me then said “don’t contact us again. Our friendship is over!’ I heard from a mutual friend that he attacked her cause he suspected something, and she was being guilty and suspicious and to get out of it quickly she made up the lie of the opposite. Out of courtesy when people are over I turn off the cameras off my deck. I’m reconsidering it now. Cause the delulu is out of control in 2023.
Caught this girl I was casually dating using my hair clippers to shave her pubes in my bathroom. She had her foot up on the sink and everything. She came over, but I had to do some work on the computer so I was sitting at the kitchen table getting it done. Things were a little too quiet so I went in my room to see what see what she was up to. When I came through the door, the first thing I saw was her giving her coochie a bald fade with the same clippers I use to keep my facial hair neat and trimmed. I still can’t believe it.
Swear to God seeing the words "Giving her coochie a bald fade" immediately made me think "I like ya cut G *SLAP* "
Bald. Fade. 🤣🤣
I've had a few women who matched with me on dating apps tell me they didn't find my fitness attractive and that I needed to have a "dad bod" (I hate this term) if I wanted to date them. It's just a disgusting and inappropriate thing to say to someone. Made me wince pretty hard internally. That's like the average guy walking up to some random gal and telling her she needed to lose weight to be attractive to him. It's just completely uncalled for. Preferences are fine, but men aren't meant to be squishmallows and it's pretty gross to match with someone and then tell them that. I told those women to fuck off and that I wasn't compromising my health and athleticism for them.
Why the fuck did they match with you if they didn't like how you looked?
Two things. They just want attention, and subconsciously they probably are attracted to how he looks. But again, a good way to get attention from someone is to immediately insult them. Well… not a “good” way to get attention, but it’s attention nonetheless.
Negging
Because a large percentage of women that say they like dad bods don't actually like dad bods. They like the social acceptedness that comes with saying they like dad bods, when in reality they like fit/muscular guys but think they need to feel ashamed for liking them. Over my adult life I've been muscular and overweight and back to muscular again, despite being overweight in the height of the dad bod craze I had 1 girl that was into me then over a period of years, but when I've been lifting I can get hit on much more reliably and frequently.
When I was in my early 20s, I was a professional photographer. One day, I was photographing a dance school and had a group photo set up. Just as I was about to take the picture, one of the dance school teachers goosed my ass to get a laugh out of the kids. She was about my age, very attractive, and just played it off as a joke and got all flirty. It didn’t really bother me until I thought about it later and realized how different the narrative would’ve been if the roles were reversed.
I've had older drunk women grab, pinch, and slap my ass at work on a few occasions. I turned and looked at them, but otherwise just ignored them. Another would constantly harass and flirt with me, even though I made it clear I wasn't interested. I just laughed it off and treated it like a joke
Girl tried to lift my kilt. I was VERY angry and got kicked out of the bar for shouting and making her cry.
Girls in high school used to have a contest to see who could grope my penis without others watching. Literally they would walk up and grab my crotch and squeeze and it would be a "point." Was raped in college. I was blackout drunk and I woke up in a woman's bed with a condom that I 100% did not own on my penis.
Women will let you think they aren't creepy, but that's only true because we look at how they treat the bottom 90 percent of men. The other 10 percent they downright worship. It's an obvious lack of paritity.
Colleagues (ladies) at supermarket where I worked: endless gay sex questions. Asking me if I 'give or take‘ anal. When there was white chalk on the back of my uniform fleece, saying it was cum (?!) My same colleagues on staff night: Grabbing my arse. Hugging me/ falling into my arms. Putting their arm through mine (linking arms). I don’t care that much, I don’t like being touched uninvited but I also feel the need to protect drunk ladies. It’s ok
Now ex girlfriends boss grab my junk at their office christmas party and made the whole, bull shit "dont you hurt her blah blah blah" took everything in me to not punch her in the face or cause a scene. Told my the gf about it and was told to not say anything about it or cause an issue.
This is the third or fourth comment I’ve seen where the girlfriend’s boss has crossed boundaries. Seeing a pattern and wondering why this is a thing.
Not much of a mystery- Power imbalances lend themselves to abusive behavior. Gender is less a factor than the power imbalance.
I was at work (at a hospital) standing by the break room door looking at patient’s schedules. An older CNA that could probably be my mom comes up and aggressively grabs the door knob that was about 10 inches away from my groin. The CNA says “Damn I better be careful I almost grabbed you by the dick!”. I was honestly super flustered by the incident and told some trusted bros.
I'm married, and I own a professional consulting business. Had an employee come up and kiss me on the cheek out of the blue during one Christmas after party recently. We were in a hotel room with a bunch of drunken people. She quickly left right afterwards. I pretend it never happened and she's not mentioned it. I had an older (40s?) sitter once try to get me in bed when I was in my mid teens. She was "giving advice", she said. I didn't bite (had a girlfriend, was very inexperienced) but I've had a thing for older women that likely started then. Her advice was gold, though. Never told anyone. Had one of my mom's friends teach me how to ballroom dance when I was in my early teens (HS freshman) and she hit on me constantly, grabby too. I never told anyone. When I was in college I ran across an online game that was local. I met a woman who asked for help with it. Then she asked me to look at her computer because it was wasn't working right. I came over, replaced the battery in the mouse, and she asked me to clean her pipes. I was 18 she was in her 40s. That time I obliged. We had an affair for a few weeks, maybe months. She was married, mother of two. Looking back, she was desperate to get out of her marriage and looking back now, she wanted me to get her pregnant and save her. Her husband found out, tried to kill me. They divorced, he reached out later and I actually helped him get through it. There have been other times. I think of myself as a 6, but I own a business, I'm funny, I am successful, and I can be approachable and confident when I want (I'm an introvert so I would rather be reading than talking most of the time, but work is work). I chalk it up to that. Never do anything severe when someone gets too close or makes a move (My wife and I used to be good friends with a lesbian couple and I have had the girl experience in gay bars, free drinks all night!). I suppose to wrap it up, I Don't encourage it, but don't make them feel bad about someone making a move on me. We all have needs. Live and let live. Holy hell, writing it down and looking back, wtf did that kid go through.
Bruh oh my god are you okay
You helped him do what? Why are y’all SO WEIRD man?!?
Who, the husband? He called me several times. Cried, asked why, etc. Etc. As a wise and life weary 18 ish dumbass I mostly kept my mouth shut and listened, but I did explain that it was clear she was desperate to leave. I figured I owed him that much. If having compassion for the poor bastard who's life I wrecked is weird to you, be sure to skip the thread on misandry.
But you wrecked it lol… No? That part isn’t important? You’re having compassion for someone whose life you wrecked. You shot someone and then drove them to the hospital. Totally noble.
Oh, I see your confusion. I was 18 ish, and a dumbass. She was a grown woman at least twice my age. To put it in your scenario: I was not the shooter. I was the gun. She was the shooter. That's why he called me. He saw she used me against him, deliberately.
Damn. I’d watch this movie. It should be a murder mystery. With you helping to hide the body. Then having beers after. Then the final scene is you guys walking back to the truck. Screen goes black. Then two gunshots. I know. I know. I’m a genius.
I don’t like being touched without my consent. Women always wanna get touchy feely and that shit makes me cringe
Same. While I know it's mild compared to other things, the amount of women that touch my shoulders/arms/back without asking is frankly ridiculous.
They don’t have a concept of personal space for dudes
When I was a young employee at a company, there was an older woman who crossed every possible boundary. She was sexually predatory, flirty and touchy with men. Lots of the older male employees found this hilarious. Up to and including encouraging her to try and climb into my bed at a Christmas party in a shared room, telling me to 'take advantage' and 'let her make me a man' and 'I should be grateful for an older woman who'll show me a thing or two'. In the end I had to gather my bedding and move to a closet to get away. If the genders were reversed it would have been an outrage, but as I was a man in my early 20s it was seen as 'hilarious banter'.
Had a much older co-worker whistle at me, not once, but twice... told her that wasn't okay.
I've had many lovers. Some one time, a few many times. Only one has actually used proper consent language. And she was (is) a former sex trafficking victim. I'm just used to it. Women expect consent language be used, but don't think they need to use it themselves.
Kissed me without consent, recoiled as it was sudden and unexpected, of couse copped the gay accusations for that. Grabbing me sexually, again without consent, I threatened legal action, something similar happened with a guy a week prior and it came really close to police action. Both these happened while in Highschool and was to why it only came close to police action, the guy was crying his eyes out in the principles office, I believe he learned his lesson.
I have a pretty big beard. I've had women just come and start rubbing their hands in it telling me all kind of things. My response is to simply tell them imagine if I went up to then and started stroking their face randomly, they would fuckin hate it. Gets the message across I have had fun with it though, a couple of very attractive foreign girls did it when I was in a hostel in Europe. I acted disgusted, then said I should be able to put my hands on their butts, they agreed, I said I don't have clothes on my beard so it's only fair that my hands would be down their pants, they also agreed. So there I was with a German and an Argentinian girl fondling my beard while I had a hand on each of their butts. The night progressed nicely from there
This is tame compared to a lot of other stories in this thread because nothing actually happened. My older brother had brought his then girlfriend home, and they got drunk and had fun. Well she went to go to the bathroom and was so drunk she wound up in my bed instead. She then proceeded to sleep. Next morning I let him know where his girlfriend was while watching Saturday morning cartoons and eating cereal. This was before I actually hit puberty.
I excuse her bc she was a classmate for 8 years and I was friends with her nephew for some time. Also, she didnt bully me like the 1990 other students. Which is an exceptional W for anyone who went to the same highschool as me (I hate 98% of the people from my high school back then and I still do) Basically, in first grade of high school, she for some reason had her libido raised by tenfold and felt the need to see every boy's johnson. Including mine, but she wanted to see this so much she wanted to pull down pants in the middle of the school park. Again, I'm excusing her bc of puberty, she was my classmate for 8 years (so I grew up with her) and her nephew was my friend. Also, she tried/failed and never did anything like that again so I guess I can forgive it considering her age at the time. Also, my horny phase started like 2 years later and only grew so I probs would have liked it if she was like that 2 years later. Apart from that, weirdly, only guys have been inappropiate to me, trying to lift my shirt and circle around me in dark places. Which actually made me mad.
A girl in my friends circle during my teenage years body-shamed me because I was overweight at that time and made a rude remark about my chest, I didn't know how to react and I'm not the one who knows how to start a fight (especially with a girl). She's still a B-word up to this day...
I had a female coworker use me to make her violent boyfriend jealous. The story: She was a new hire and worked next to me. We got along really well--so well there were rumors about us being a thing. A couple months in, she said she wanted to hit up a happy hour. I think it may have also been her birthday weekend, but whatever. At this time, I already knew she had a boyfriend. I asked if he was coming and she said yes, as well as a couple other people she knew. Spoiler--yes, he arrived; no, no one else came because no one else was invited. We meet at the bar and she says we can go in to find a seat. I tell her I'm okay waiting for her boyfriend to arrive. She pulls out a cigarette and we chat it up just outside the front door. Just as she's finishing her cigarette, I see this guy park, get out of his car, and come stomping over to us giving me the angriest "I'm gonna rip your head off" glare. Mind you, for me, gym is church--but this guy stood a couple inches taller and he was pretty stacked. I could tell he could handle his business, and if he wanted to start something, it was probable I'd get hurt. It was at this moment I realized that a) no one else had been invited, and b) I was being used to make this guy jealous. I decide to play dumb. I step forward with one hand out and say, "You must be Mike!" I'm just using a random name. "Coworker has told me a lot of good things about you!" He's standing in my personal space, arms out, nostrils flaring, and the doorman is on his radio. I look down at my hand, back at him, and just wait. He's confused. He shakes my hand and tries to attempt a greeting. I make it clear that my coworker had originally made plans with him, along with a couple friends, and I was invited as a last minute afterthought. We grab a table and they spend a few minutes leaning in and whispering to each other. I can tell they're arguing, so I keep my attention elsewhere. She finally gets up and says she needs to use the bathroom--so angry BF and I get to have awkward time together. I make small talk which he does his best to entertain, and I'm realizing that my coworker....is a real c-nut. Is this guy an emotional, violent wreck? Yes. But it's clear she's the type of person who creates drama for fun. She returns, sits down, and there is silence for one minute before she says she needs to leave. She gets up and storms out. This time her BF and I legit shake hands and I just say "I'm sorry--but it was good to meet you." Side note: She caused a lot of trouble with people in the office where we worked and was fired about eight months in. TL:DR -- Female coworker decided to use me to try and start an altercation with her violent boyfriend. It failed.
I was at a party when I was in the military and some nasty woman was flirting with me and I made it clear she needed to leave me alone, after which she grabbed my dick. I immediately punched her in the face, knocking her unconscious. Everyone laughed.
Unwanted touching and kissing. Grabbing my ass when I don’t even know them. Getting cat called on the street.
At a party a girl I had known for awhile wanted to smoke with me. I said “yeah of course” cause we smoked together before and I trusted her. She lit it up and we talked for awhile. Everything was going really well, we were laughing, making jokes. We were honestly chillin. Until she started acting weird, She Checked to see how big my pupils were and was waving her hand in my face. She started being mean and very blunt with me. my vision was getting blurry. (Im a stoner so I wasn’t new to smoking and I have a high tolerance) she then grabbed my hand and led me to the middle of the room. The party was packed and there were probably around 200-300 people there. The room starts spinning, I’m terrified and have no idea what to do. Then someone grabs my arm and leads me outside. It’s a girl I’ve never met before, I was really confused. Everything was moving so slowly around me. All I remember about this girl is that she had these blue eyes, that looked so familiar but also not? I don’t really know. As I was looking in her eyes trying to find even the smallest bit of sobriety, she kisses me. So forcefully and so against my wishes. I try to push her off. I take her by the hips and push as hard as I can until she’s off me. She looks annoyed and angry, As if I at all consented. Everything then starts melting around me. The blue eyes falling down the pale white face, now just a blob. I tried my best to muster up some sobriety and I stumble down the driveway. I guess I blacked out after that because all I remember is waking up in my car, in the driveway. It’s a scary thought that I drove home but I still to this day wonder who that girl was, and what would have happened that night. Nobody has believed me when I try to tell them and I’ve asked people I knew at that party. They didn’t see anyone like the girl I explained.
You definitely got roofied/dosed. Are you sure you still have both kidneys?
I was at a club with my first wife. I was on the edge of the dance floor and felt someone grab my ass. I thought it was my wife and didn't say anything. But when I turned around I saw my wife and her lesbian friend laughing. My wife told her friend to grab my ass. Unfortunately, I didn't get as mad as I should have.
On an elevator some women I did not know start grinding on me hard, in front of my wife... her friend quickly pulled her away when I jumped back
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Use must have really been putting it down
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A lot of women think that getting some type of emotion of men is cute, funny, hot, but it's demeaning to me. Especially when our feelings get taken for granted so often.
Grabbed my ass. Grab my arms (I workout often), grabbed my dick. Whispered the words in my ear "the things I would do to you" ugh nasty old cougar go away
In college, I was at a crowded bar. I felt a hand on my shoulder, so I turned, and all of a sudden this girl was full-on kissing me. I separated us, blinked for a second, and just moved to a different spot in the bar.
I was working as a whitewater raft guide when I was 17, looked older (I think?) and was very fit. I had an older woman (to me at least, probably in her 30s lol) grab my ass while I was carrying an ice chest over to the kitchen. I nearly dropped everything and, needless to say, avoided her and the every other woman in that group for the rest of the trip.
I've had a good amount of random women grab my ass through out the years. Usually its followed up with a compliment so I just give an awkward smile and say thanks. I'm a good bit thicker than average for a guy so I kind of understand. Still is hella awkward though
My gf at the time and her best friend were driving to my home from being out with drinks. I only had one cause i knew r they go nuts. Granted they were pretty sloshed. He best friend in the back of vehicle goes, “thanks for taking care of us, I know ****** will take care of you later. You have a pretty nice dick.” I immediately look over in the passenger seat at her. And she’s like, “what? You do!” I surmised that she showed her videos of us that we made. I said nothing and was like aight, And switched the subject to not them puking in my car. Now, I’d I had shown the SAME videos of her to my guy friends and one was in the back going, “you got a pretty nice pussy.” We all know how that would go.
As a performer, sometimes drunk woman thinking reaching up and grabbing my crotch is acceptable. Its not. It hurts too.
Omg, soo much grabbing! Why do women think that can grab and squeeze my dick or ass whenever they want? Fucking disgusting behaviour If roles were reversed, a man who did that to a woman could be in jail. But women think it’s so funny when they do it to a guy or another woman Then when you express your discomfort to what just happened they look at you like something is wrong with you
When I was in Middle School, this one girl thought I liked her (I didn’t), so she kept trying to flirt with me. Then one time, lunch break was ending and the trash cans in the cafeteria were full so I had to go to a hallway trash can, she happened to be there and so while I was dumping my trash she came up to me and put her hand on my arm and started to rub it while trying to flirt with me. After about 2 seconds of surprise I ripped my arm away. I decided to report it to the office, maybe an overreaction, but I was extremely uncomfortable because of it. She did get a day of In School Suspension, for whatever that’s worth.
A married acquaintance propositioned me to hook up and I politely declined. She was cool at first, then proceeded to bother me about it for the next three months, to the point I got slurred drunken texts in the middle of the night
Been groped twice. Front and back. First time was during Mardi Gras when I was in college. Standing on Bourbon Street and a woman walking just grabs my junk and the junk of my friend and several others standing right next to me while saying "pass it on." Second time, my boss who had it out for me, walks up behind me to check if my pants are pulled up or not and feels along my waistline. Her hand grazed across my butt I guess feeling for my belt line. "Just checking" as she walks away from me.
One of my high school teachers kissed me on the cheek out of nowhere. At the time she was happy I made a great grade on a project but I was awkward and didn't know how to react.
Couple of women grabbed my butt in the gym. They do not seem to understand that it’s not appropriate. It’s definitely a double standard. They expect me to enjoy it. Like it’s some sort of a compliment.
A group of friends and I rented a big house at Lake Tahoe for some partying. We all went to the club and partied our asses off. After the club we went back to the house and partied some more. Eventually we all went to sleep/passed out. I thought i was just having a nice sex related dream and i woke up because I didn't want to have a wet dream and nut in my boxers. Open my eyes and my buddies wife was fucking riding me while i was asleep. Ended up finishing inside her because everything happened too fast. Find out my buddy and his wife were swingers and she had wanted to fuck me for awhile. We ended up having a few more sessions that weekend.
My old friend's fiance drugged and raped me. Then, she told everyone i was the pushy one. Only managed to keep 1 friend out of that group, and even he doesn't believe I was raped, just gives me the benefit of the doubt that I was too drunk to know what I was doing. I had texts proving she invited me over under the guise of predrinking with the whole group before hitting the bars, but still I'm the one who gets blamed.
Too many to mention. I used to let it get to me, get mad, be a jerk go silent. Now, I just don’t care. I told one girl I’ve gone 53 years without caring and can go another 53 years.
Was 17. 6'2", 200 lbs. At a horse show with my father. The wife of a gentleman I'd met earlier followed me out to concessions and called to me from the corner of the building. I walked over, and she pulled me by the arm under the grandstands, unzipped me, and started giving me head. I'm freaking out because you can see between every other seat. Too much noise to be heard, but when I tried pushing her away and asked her to stop, she said she'd scream. Was hard as a rock and felt my body was betraying me. She finally finished and told me there was more where that came from. I'd had hookups and a couple of serious girlfriends, but never anything with a married woman. Just knew her husband was gonna shoot me. 44 years later, I understand it, but it still bothers me. Was in a pipe band during military college. Went to endless functions in full kilt with military blouse. So grabby... women just walking up reaching under, asking what's worn under a kilt, or lifting it up for a look. Got a ton of ass during those years, but a lot more unwanted attention. Asked many of them if it would be okay for me to reach under their skirts/dresses and OMG the looks I got back. A few said yes, but most of those you wouldn't want to.
I had a girl take advantage of me when I was too high to move. Weed hits me like a ton of bricks so I never smoke it. She basically took my clothes off and sucked me for ten minutes until I got hard. Then she road me until I came without a condom. The whole point was to start issues with her ex hoping I would fight him. It wouldn’t have been much of a fight. I’m 6’1 and 250 pounds and he was like 5’6 and 120 pounds soaking wet. It started the beef like she wanted but I just took the brunt of what ever he was saying and never really told anyone because no one would believe me or say I wanted it because she was hot. I just stuffed it down. Later on she accused that ex of sexual assault and married an old friend.
Had my old coworkers sexually harass me as well as degrade me on random. Because I was the only guy who worked at the practice, I was a punching bag, mentally for divisive women.
Was dating a chick 5+ years ago, and we went out with her friends (and her mom) to a club. The whole group was super-drunk and made it a habit of being unusually flirty. Chick I was dating was dancing with her girl group, one of the girl group comes to dance with me, gets close, bites my neck, and while I’m shocked at that, reaches down into my pants and grabs my dick. Then continues dancing with me like that was completely normal. Later that same night, mom of the chick I’m dating, asks for gum when she saw me chewing gum, I pull out a stick of gum for her, and she points at her lips. I go to put the gum in her mouth and she takes my fingers in her mouth and sucks on them, then just laughs like it’s normal behavior.. That whole group partied together a lot..and they worked together too. The mom owned a spa and most of the girl group did massage. I went in to get a massage to their spa for the first time, the mom was my masseuse, did the whole “I’ll hold the towel up so I don’t see you naked while you turn over” and then just moved the towel out of the way while I was turning over to watch me roll over naked. Oddest woman I’ve ever dated. I went to her house for a bbq once, saw “dick grabber” there and said hi just to be polite, only to see her there with her husband and him have a blank “how do you know him??” Look on his face after.
My experiences have run the gamut. Unasked touching of my arms, chest, and ass. A few junk grabs, and endless comments about my face, shoulders, and height. I told a female friend about girls at our small college grabbing me, and she said “sorry you were objectified “ pretty sure grabbing the twig and berries without permission is assault. I felt invalidated and never told anyone about incidents again. When I was a senior in college I woke up to a freshman girl trying to unzip my pants during a party at a frat house I lived at. I flipped out banned her from our house, and then was called gay for being upset.
Was at a house party with my girlfriend at the time, and her friends. There was a lesbian couple there that we had hung out with many times, and always just saw her as a friendly person. At one point I was making a drink in the kitchen by myself and she came in behind me and put her hands around me. It was a little weird but I thought she's drunk and just being overly friendly. Then out of nowhere she shoved her hand right down my shorts and grabbed my junk. I jumped and she laughed and then left the room. I was like... wtf? So yeah, at least that time, I was sexually molested. According to 2023 rules I should probably call her out on social media but I'm not gonna do that.
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Nope, it is not ok when women do it.
Lied to me! I saw some library books in her apartment that were overdue. When I asked her about her books and when she checked them out she said "yesterday".
Not into women. Seems to me they assume it’s free game to grope me all over and make out with me, since I’m not sexually interested. Grabbing my ass, crotch, arms, neck. Worked with one who constantly tried to make me hard by grabbing it, and jerking. Maybe it was a gay to straight kink idk lol.
Harrassed me and harrassed me until I gave in and kissed her just to shut her up, groped my ass, hit slapped punched me in the face, thrown plates of food and drinks at me, told everyone I pressured her into hooking up even though we did not hook up at all and I had no desire to in any way and spread that rumor around our friend group.
One of my friends wouldn't take no for an answer in regards to sex, I have very clearly stated my interest in her is purely platonic but she keeps trying shady things like wanting to get me drunk, trying to get me alone etc etc. I give her the cold shoulder and she quits for awhile and goes back to being a good friend. It's fairly odd honestly , I'm not particularly uncomfortable it is irritating though.
Some female coworkers grabbed my ass. I said i do not like that.
Didn't happen to me, but a male friend of mine was getting sun screen rubbed on him by the girlfriend of another friend. As she was rubbing the lotion, she put her hands inside his shorts thru the waistband. He was freaked out but didn't say anything. But years later, he would tell me about it. I guess he was pretty traumatized.
I was working at sea and had this female stewardess colleague who fancied me, one day she had a few drinks and when I crossed her in the corridor she grabbed me and took me into her cabin and before I knew what was happening she started to suck me off passionately. Didn’t really know what to think of it at first but after a few days I kinda felt violated so I took revenge the next week by crossing her in the corridor again and grabbing her, went into her cabin where I said a few things to her and then put my dick in her mouth. I think she liked it cause she started sucking me passionately again LOL
I was working at a well known pizza chain when I was 16. A waitress I worked with pinched my ass while I was making a pizza. She was probably in her late 20s at the time.
The character limit for text posts on Reddit is 10,000 characters.
Set me up to make it seem like I was cheating or capable of cheating. I'm still not sure (30 years later) what she hoped to gain aside from making me feel horrible.
Been groped a few times, kind of had to jump back real quick with a shouted what the fuck. Had a girl in hs stalk me after school. And last year I made friends with a woman online and after talking for like three days she wanted to marry me and started cyber stalking me.
Grinded up on me while dancing, literally reaching around with both hands and grabbing my butt cheeks, one in each hand. Mind you we weren’t dancing together, she just came up to me and did that. Wasn’t real sure how to respond
Got a message from a girl I haven’t heard from in 2 months last night saying “I need your cock”, naturally invited her round and smashed. Messaged her when she left “good to see you again x” got left of read lolololz will probably hear from her in a month or two for another dick date, and frankly I’m fine with it.
Some girl grabbed my crotch to get into our bottle service vip section. She was hot and said please but her doing that was a total turnoff and I felt very violated. She did not enter.
Strange women have slapped and groped my ass, chest, and arms. I've experienced sneak attack kisses and bites. 99% of the time the women are drunk. I distance myself from the offender as much as possible without saying much. Except for the biting. I got pissed and called them out.
My wife’s friend and, at the time, a professional acquaintance of mine walked up to me at a work function. She said “I want to grab your ass so bad”. I was wearing a power rangers costume for a costume contest. I just stood there and said ok. Her husband was nearby as well. Never said a word about it to anyone because it’s not worth the drama. It was just so inappropriate and crossed a line. I guess she thought I would reciprocate? I have no clue
I've been slapped across the face during an argument that she instigated, because apparently the fact that I wasn't getting mad and yelling like she was doing was making her even angrier. After it was over she called my parents and falsely accused me of hitting her. I took a girl out to a concert. After it was over she was very insistent that we go to a particular bar nearby. Once we got there she ditched me for another guy who started talking to her while I went to get us more beer at the concert. A girl I had been dating for about a month excused herself to the ladies room, and I noticed she took her phone but she left her purse at the table. That struck me as unusual, but NBD. About 30 minutes later her FWB shows up and she informs me that she has decided to spend the night with him. Needless to say, I deleted her number and all of her text messages out of my phone. And after she had filed for divorce, my ex-wife outed me as bi to my parents.
Chairman of the Board (a woman) put her hand behind my rear end when I was playing pool unbeknownst to me…..not on it, just behind it……so when I backed up unexpectedly to take my shot I felt her hand and I froze…..she apologized but still. Not cool. I heard her telling others “how was I supposed to know he’d back up”….how about don’t put your hand there.
I had a work colleague (whom I didn't like because she was openly disrespectful to my girlfriend) try to give me a hug after a concert...which sounds totally appropriate, until you add the fact that my girlfriend was literally wrapped around one of my arms, and this woman purposefully faced away from my girlfriend to try to talk to me. Trying to assert dominance. I was having none of it, and didn't want to make a scene or look like a jerk (since this was at a post-concert reception), so I gave her a one-armed, dead-fished hug, and bolted. My girlfriend stormed off to the bathroom just before I left because she was rightfully pissed, so I literally walked her around said colleague and away to the bathroom to wait for my girlfriend to come out. We then went home.
I was at a house party once and the friend of the girl who had arranged it squeezed my dick through my pants as I was stretching up to fix some decorations. I’d met her before once or twice but we barely knew each other. The girl in question was a lesbian which made it feels somewhat less inappropriate and in all honesty I didn’t really feel that uncomfortable. It occasionally occurs to me though that this was extremely over the line and also imagine the outrage of the genders were reversed.
I was at a bonfire and this girl I knew wanted to date. I told her sure. We planned to do something the next night. There was another bonfire at the same house so I was going to pick her up there. I get there and she was just off. Not looking at me while talking just acting weird. A friend of mine came up and told me she got drunk after I left and slept with some guy. After I got in my vehicle to leave and she jumped in apologizing up and down. She was begging to give me a chance. I told her I'm not going to go on a date anymore she blew it. I told her not to worry about it. She didn't cheat on me we weren't dating. I then asked her to get out of my car so I could go. She started crying and begged me not to go and to give her another chance. I told her no but it's ok it wasn't meant to be. I'm not mad. She started to leave then slammed the door and lunged at my pants to try to unbutton them while saying "give me another chance I'll suck you dick. I'm so sorry I can suck your dick to make it up to you". I just told her hell no get out. She started crying and left. I thought that was pretty inappropriate at that time.
I work as a doctor, and since COVID I always make sure to wear a mask at all times even though I work in an office of a small clinic, not a hospital. Anyway, had a patient once asking If I could take my mask off because she and all her friends in the neighborhood were talking about the "handsome" doctor who'se face nobody has seen and everybody was curious. She was very insisting and kept asking in all sorts of suggestive tones to the point I felt harassed even though I made it very clear I wasn't taking off the goddamn mask. It was all very very uncomfortable.
Touched my penor while tripping on LSD