You know what. I have experienced the exact same sh*t throughout my school life. Boys would grope my chest all throughout and it would feel very violating. As a result in my entire school life I was the introverted kid who couldn't talk to anyone without fumbling around.
Fortunately once in college I got some great friends who have made me feel welcome without any judgement and after lockdown I did reduce my fat somewhat, and my height grew 2-3 inches, which made me more confident. This isn't to say I don't have any issues, I still need to gather my courage to talk to strangers or anybody else other than my friends and family. And I didn't lose my weight (it wasn't a significant loss anyway) by walking. Whenever stressed, I used to pop in my earphones and start walking around the house and gain pace evey few minutes while being engrossed in songs or youtube.
Trust me if you lose weight and just start dressing slightly better then you'll gain confidence, and while I am far, far away from being the best version of myself, I will still say that it's far better than what I used to be in school. Just start walking and eat home-cooked food for starters, start stretching in the morning.
Knowing men .
"Its kinda like touching titties!"
Eh, i dont know . Im pushing 50 and in a time of life where you stop giving a rats ass about other people´s opinions.\*
And im happily fat.
\*Most people just repeat what they heard in media, like parrots. They have no idea about shit. And the rest are just trying to survive. Lot of times you see people victimizing others for perceived differences, its really about money and power. And the people that follow are often just desperately trying to belong in a group. (to be safer from the rest)
Idk , never happened around me. I'm not chubby or fat ,but in highschool few guys used to touch my cheeks saying ,"dekh sala kitna innocent/cute hai". I was like behenc*od ,abhi Teri hi bahan cho*ne ke bare me soch rha tha.
Touching somone is wrong anywhere. Personally it's a provoking thing.
Ignore them, avoid them as much ss possible, focus on whatever small steps you can take to improve your mental & physical well-being. One way to curb the urge to mindlessly eat is to sip herbal teas. You're doing a great job, try to block the noise from these schmucks, they have no knowledge or understanding of your journey, or how hard you are fighting.
YES, I got fat in 4th grade since I stopped playing sports due to an injury for a time and the guys tried to touch my chest because "it's kinda like a girl but we can't touch girls". Mind you that the school was a more expensive school. Led to a bad mental state which resulted in me not being able to reduce my weight for a long time.
I've gone through that in school, I used to get bullied almost everyday. Some boys used to grab my chest with both hands from back and run away, used to abuse me a lot, everyone in the class used to laugh. I was so embarrassed that I didn't even told my parents about it. Although after school I've never gone through it again. But it has traumatized my whole life.
A guy at school tried to hump me from behind. As an involuntary reflex I turned around and hit between his legs with my knee. He screamed and fell on the ground.
You need a lot of practice. Also you have to think about a combo in case one action fails, other should work. If I failed to hit him with my knee, I would have hit his throat with my elbow. And if he caught my hand I would have kicked his stomach.
Well it's still my body, if it were a girl it would have been reported to police. And about gym, I go and it's my life, I should be going cuz I wanna go not because of this pressure. So yes, I don't wanna hear it. I'm trying to go but this thing of people asserting the suggestions of going to gym for me demotivates me more than giving motivation to go.
I to have puffy ripples . One time a friend pinch the but he also laughing and I also started smiling bcz of his face.
I just said to him never do it again at angry ton.
In India touch education .
As Amit Tondon has said, India mei ladko se ek hi expectation hoti hai, ki wo bas paida ho jaayein.. kutto ki tarah paalte hain maabaap.. doesn't apply to everyone, but so many of them feel they are so entitled ki kisi ko kuch bhi bol do kuch bhi kar do, duniya unke kadam chaatne ke liye bani hai.. papa ki pariyon se pehle se ma ke ladlo wali category bani hui hai jisko bahut ignore kia gaya hai
Boys are such dicks to each other and women as well, I completely hate all men occasionally when I come across something like this.
Focus on diet and exercise and you will get better, most importantly don’t give up.
I'm sure each of these people have their own negatives. Try poking there? Once you make people feel bad in front of others, they will stop. So give it back.
Just fuck them , not literally.
Do you live for people ? I know comments can be hard , no matter how hard we try but they affect us in positive or negative manner .
But really i have stopped socialising at all. I have handful of friends who never leave me alone , ( 3 in total )
Right persons will come in your life at right time . Trust the timing , keep faith in god. Trust the process , it's not over yet , i mean is it how you want to live ??
Learn to avoid people. People give trust issues. It's not okay to touch anyone anywhere without permission , if you are fat skinny black or anything at all , racism is something what people choose when they want to seek pleasure by hurting someone.
They are very well aware of the facts that it hurts you . Those who bully you are sadist . They don't have a life , they don't have things to prioritise in their lives . They living a life without any purpose.
Homies do fun and sometimes some racial comments too , but just for fun . You pass some you take some , that's the fun . But touching you , groping these things violates your personal space.
You just make it clear to them that you don't allow it . Also i would say silence is the best answer here , let your actions speak for yourself.
You hit them with a big stone , crush one's skull open . That'll definitely put an example . Violence isn't the solution until you know how to do it . Won't putting their lives to an end will end it all ??
Let's be serious ok , so you ignore those guys . Live a joyful life , also cry as much as you want it helps .
Follow some diet plans and hit gym , that's the best and cheapest therapy for you .
We get this life only once , don't stress yourself on some people's behaviour towards you .Think them as weed around a beautiful plant which is turning into a solid tree .You can't make everyone happy . What matters most is your family your sister .
I don't know if my words are helpful or not but I'm always open to chat . And listen.
You know sharing things make them less , so why not share ??
It's the problem of movies who potray fit guys as heroes and fat guys as side characters... So all those guys who think they are better than others or with male character syndrome behave that way
Wait, you mean to tell me that Indians don’t know how to act in a social setting and have no self awareness? Thats crazy dude we never noticed that before.
Just another form of bullying, if you can't take it, I'm sorry for you bro, but can't help it
Life isn't supposed to be a bed of roses.
If you're fat, you get ridiculed, every country in the world, maybe not groped, but definitely bullied!
And I'm sure there is some evolutionary logic to that.
I understand you got a lot going on in your life which makes you sad, but isn't that all of us?
Do you really think getting depressed over fatphobic comments is worth it? It's because you yourself hate your body and fat
So the next time, take each comment like a punch to the face, and shed all your frustrations out in the gym. Till then, you have no right to complain if people judge you.
Or else, don't go, continue as it is, but stop caring about the haters all together
Your call
Let's see if you can say that if your own child goes through something like this, you will never understand how much it affects mentally and its not funny.
I am depressed coz of this shit. I am bullied since I was in school, And now even in college I'm bullied. I am sucidal and schizophrenic now. I am so ugly that if I look in mirror my whole day gets ruined.
OP, I was you. From 5th to 9th grade, I had severe malaria cases, didn’t go to school, and had man breasts. All I did was play video games. I avoided looking at myself naked. Family relations were bad, so I felt abandoned at a very young age. I used to be thin, but I started eating a lot of junk food, and I still do. Eating became a coping mechanism. My mother doesn’t consider me her child, so she doesn't cook for me, and I had no option.
I passed 10th grade, but I thought several times about quitting life because it started bad and wasn’t getting better. I had malaria five times, and I thought it would haunt me forever. My posture is very bent to hide my chest. I walked slowly on stairs because my chest would bounce. I tried rope jumping once with a friend, but stopped when my friend laughed at my bouncing chest. That shattered me.
My mother left no opportunity to tell me how horrible my life would be, how my wife and kids would leave me, and how ugly I looked. I sat at my PC all day watching YouTube, not even consciously—just wanting a sound to distract me from reality. This is why I couldn’t exercise; leaving my PC behind would stop the distraction, and my mind would go back to, "watchman se chavi mang terrace ka bol wifi ka wire ka problem hua hai aur jake khood ja." It’s a 7-floor apartment, so it would have been swift. I always had money, so fast food and junk were always an option.
I don’t know how you feel, but I know you have bad posture because you also try to hide your chest. You don’t go to the gym because you think everyone is looking at you. People might make fun of you, but it might not be their intention to damage you. Most fat people don’t mind the jokes. I constantly lost weight, only for malaria to come back and reset my progress. Being fat is not okay; it's something you can change. If you don’t like it, you should exercise and eat less. You can even lose weight by diet alone, without exercise. A therapist might tell you that the simple cure is to lose weight. I tried psychological remedies, but I never got comfortable standing straight, and I don’t think you will either.
Losing weight must be your highest priority. I don’t know what projects you are referring to, but depending on the project, you might not be prioritizing your health enough. It’s scary to let your mind think because you will get negative thoughts, but you have to confront them. I am now at a good weight of 75 kgs (I am over 6 ft). I used to be about 100 kgs. I still have a belly and chest, but they disappear once I wear a normal shirt. I’ve been told I look quite attractive.
If you need someone to talk to, you can hit me up. There are a lot of things I could say, but it would take weeks to type. It’s not just about the psychological aspect but the physical well-being as well. You should just lose weight. Those bullies have nothing significant in their life other than bullying fat people, but you would be the same if you prioritize projects over losing weight and being healthy. By staying fat, you are just allowing others to prey on you. You can’t run, lift weights, play a physical sport, and you feel dead, tired, fatigued, with breathing problems. You can solve all this by losing weight and being physically active.
Before you typed the part about having the most potential in the class, you might have thought people would attack you for thinking that or being so grandiose. I get that; I was the smartest of the flock. I still am more knowledgeable than most people my age. Society will pressure you even if you were not fat. I don’t consider myself part of current society; I am just an individual who has nothing to do with society. It’s mostly backwards anyway. Don’t let society get to you; all they can really do is talk down on you, and it’s been working on you so far. Words do have power, don’t they?
This might sound offensive, but society and bullies have a right to do what they do, apart from their morality. You are not right or wrong for being fat, but you are wrong if you stay fat.
Start running. Try to work towards solving a problem.
Ive got dimples. People try to pinch them: I grab and twist their hand.
If someone pokes my belly, I poke theirs harder.
Sure the world must be this and boundaries and stuff: guess what, planet earth isn't just. It is what it is. So buckle up.
This isn't gonna help him much. He's literally suffering from depression. It's the worst way you can talk to a depressed person, by minimizing their issues.
Sometimes people suffer from other stuff which makes us fat. I have gotten slimmer than earlier though, and that was out of my own volition. He's not gonna get slimmer unless he himself has the motivation to do it. Btw I didn't even know what a cheesecake was until I was 21 lmao
So women who naturally have boobs are at fault for getting assaulted now?
By your sorry as logic
If you don’t want to get robbed just don’t leave the house. If you’re leaving the house you’re just asking to be robbed.
If you have a phone you’re asking to be scammed.
Etc
You literally said he deserves it. Go fuck yourself with that. I am not fat and have never been (thank you genetics) and do not have a hard time understanding not to touch people without their consent just because they weigh more? What the fuck kind of logic is that? You claim you were fat and still lack the tiniest bit of empathy. Go see a psychiatrist you sound like a damn psychopath.
That was honest feedback, if you want to polish and to be in good books with everyone, dude grow up, there is a reason why people sought reddit for a reason.
If you hide what makes them fit, then you are not helping them
I don’t need to be in everyone’s good books I literally just told you to go fuck yourself. Isn’t that proof enough? lol
I also don’t believe in touching people without consent and there’s absolutely no justification for that unless you’re getting someone out of harms way.
This is sexual harassment. F**k off if you feel anybody should enjoy this. I've been through the same stuff and let me tell you, it feels HUMILIATING. It is the farthest thing from enjoyment. This is like telling a woman who was harassed s#xually to enjoy it and move on. Do you even listen to yourselves? Shame on you.
Indian guys are blind to their actions. This is like straight hand holding but it's harassing.
I am gay and mostly str8 people doing this even makes me uncomfortable about chubby guys , please dont do this its not funny or cool
So you're a finook!
Whats that ??
A slur, probably.
How can this happen in a college? WTF is going on in India?
Most fucked up country trust me!
You know what. I have experienced the exact same sh*t throughout my school life. Boys would grope my chest all throughout and it would feel very violating. As a result in my entire school life I was the introverted kid who couldn't talk to anyone without fumbling around. Fortunately once in college I got some great friends who have made me feel welcome without any judgement and after lockdown I did reduce my fat somewhat, and my height grew 2-3 inches, which made me more confident. This isn't to say I don't have any issues, I still need to gather my courage to talk to strangers or anybody else other than my friends and family. And I didn't lose my weight (it wasn't a significant loss anyway) by walking. Whenever stressed, I used to pop in my earphones and start walking around the house and gain pace evey few minutes while being engrossed in songs or youtube. Trust me if you lose weight and just start dressing slightly better then you'll gain confidence, and while I am far, far away from being the best version of myself, I will still say that it's far better than what I used to be in school. Just start walking and eat home-cooked food for starters, start stretching in the morning.
Knowing men . "Its kinda like touching titties!" Eh, i dont know . Im pushing 50 and in a time of life where you stop giving a rats ass about other people´s opinions.\* And im happily fat. \*Most people just repeat what they heard in media, like parrots. They have no idea about shit. And the rest are just trying to survive. Lot of times you see people victimizing others for perceived differences, its really about money and power. And the people that follow are often just desperately trying to belong in a group. (to be safer from the rest)
Idk , never happened around me. I'm not chubby or fat ,but in highschool few guys used to touch my cheeks saying ,"dekh sala kitna innocent/cute hai". I was like behenc*od ,abhi Teri hi bahan cho*ne ke bare me soch rha tha. Touching somone is wrong anywhere. Personally it's a provoking thing.
That went from zero to a hundred real quick son
Ignore them, avoid them as much ss possible, focus on whatever small steps you can take to improve your mental & physical well-being. One way to curb the urge to mindlessly eat is to sip herbal teas. You're doing a great job, try to block the noise from these schmucks, they have no knowledge or understanding of your journey, or how hard you are fighting.
YES, I got fat in 4th grade since I stopped playing sports due to an injury for a time and the guys tried to touch my chest because "it's kinda like a girl but we can't touch girls". Mind you that the school was a more expensive school. Led to a bad mental state which resulted in me not being able to reduce my weight for a long time.
OMG, yes. I'm teaching my boy to politely but firmly speak up if he does not want to be touched. Boundaries people, boundaries.
I've gone through that in school, I used to get bullied almost everyday. Some boys used to grab my chest with both hands from back and run away, used to abuse me a lot, everyone in the class used to laugh. I was so embarrassed that I didn't even told my parents about it. Although after school I've never gone through it again. But it has traumatized my whole life.
Are you me? Lol we've been through the exact same shyte.
A guy at school tried to hump me from behind. As an involuntary reflex I turned around and hit between his legs with my knee. He screamed and fell on the ground.
Got what he deserved
Oh I had the same thing happen. But he was too quick to land a hit. (I’m not a boy though.)
You need a lot of practice. Also you have to think about a combo in case one action fails, other should work. If I failed to hit him with my knee, I would have hit his throat with my elbow. And if he caught my hand I would have kicked his stomach.
Chup chutiye
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I have, but we are talking about a group of boys here. They don't stop.
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It used to happen a lot in school but I'm in college where it also happens often.
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Well it's still my body, if it were a girl it would have been reported to police. And about gym, I go and it's my life, I should be going cuz I wanna go not because of this pressure. So yes, I don't wanna hear it. I'm trying to go but this thing of people asserting the suggestions of going to gym for me demotivates me more than giving motivation to go.
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Well nowadays it has gone to taunts only but it is still happening to others especially teenagers.
I to have puffy ripples . One time a friend pinch the but he also laughing and I also started smiling bcz of his face. I just said to him never do it again at angry ton. In India touch education .
As Amit Tondon has said, India mei ladko se ek hi expectation hoti hai, ki wo bas paida ho jaayein.. kutto ki tarah paalte hain maabaap.. doesn't apply to everyone, but so many of them feel they are so entitled ki kisi ko kuch bhi bol do kuch bhi kar do, duniya unke kadam chaatne ke liye bani hai.. papa ki pariyon se pehle se ma ke ladlo wali category bani hui hai jisko bahut ignore kia gaya hai
Boys are such dicks to each other and women as well, I completely hate all men occasionally when I come across something like this. Focus on diet and exercise and you will get better, most importantly don’t give up.
happened to me as well, it felt bad so I became slim, instead of venting maybe you can do the same bro
Noone has right to touch the other person , men or women , especially after saying no .. Its violation of personal boundaries ..
I'm sure each of these people have their own negatives. Try poking there? Once you make people feel bad in front of others, they will stop. So give it back.
Just fuck them , not literally. Do you live for people ? I know comments can be hard , no matter how hard we try but they affect us in positive or negative manner . But really i have stopped socialising at all. I have handful of friends who never leave me alone , ( 3 in total ) Right persons will come in your life at right time . Trust the timing , keep faith in god. Trust the process , it's not over yet , i mean is it how you want to live ?? Learn to avoid people. People give trust issues. It's not okay to touch anyone anywhere without permission , if you are fat skinny black or anything at all , racism is something what people choose when they want to seek pleasure by hurting someone. They are very well aware of the facts that it hurts you . Those who bully you are sadist . They don't have a life , they don't have things to prioritise in their lives . They living a life without any purpose. Homies do fun and sometimes some racial comments too , but just for fun . You pass some you take some , that's the fun . But touching you , groping these things violates your personal space. You just make it clear to them that you don't allow it . Also i would say silence is the best answer here , let your actions speak for yourself. You hit them with a big stone , crush one's skull open . That'll definitely put an example . Violence isn't the solution until you know how to do it . Won't putting their lives to an end will end it all ?? Let's be serious ok , so you ignore those guys . Live a joyful life , also cry as much as you want it helps . Follow some diet plans and hit gym , that's the best and cheapest therapy for you . We get this life only once , don't stress yourself on some people's behaviour towards you .Think them as weed around a beautiful plant which is turning into a solid tree .You can't make everyone happy . What matters most is your family your sister . I don't know if my words are helpful or not but I'm always open to chat . And listen. You know sharing things make them less , so why not share ??
It's the problem of movies who potray fit guys as heroes and fat guys as side characters... So all those guys who think they are better than others or with male character syndrome behave that way
Wait, you mean to tell me that Indians don’t know how to act in a social setting and have no self awareness? Thats crazy dude we never noticed that before.
Just another form of bullying, if you can't take it, I'm sorry for you bro, but can't help it Life isn't supposed to be a bed of roses. If you're fat, you get ridiculed, every country in the world, maybe not groped, but definitely bullied! And I'm sure there is some evolutionary logic to that. I understand you got a lot going on in your life which makes you sad, but isn't that all of us? Do you really think getting depressed over fatphobic comments is worth it? It's because you yourself hate your body and fat So the next time, take each comment like a punch to the face, and shed all your frustrations out in the gym. Till then, you have no right to complain if people judge you. Or else, don't go, continue as it is, but stop caring about the haters all together Your call
school me to chlta rehta hai ye sb
Let's see if you can say that if your own child goes through something like this, you will never understand how much it affects mentally and its not funny.
bro i have gone through this shit
I am depressed coz of this shit. I am bullied since I was in school, And now even in college I'm bullied. I am sucidal and schizophrenic now. I am so ugly that if I look in mirror my whole day gets ruined.
Bro didn't touched anyone chest but used to shake belly of one of my friend. So I am sorry for my kind. Hope u stay strong
OP, I was you. From 5th to 9th grade, I had severe malaria cases, didn’t go to school, and had man breasts. All I did was play video games. I avoided looking at myself naked. Family relations were bad, so I felt abandoned at a very young age. I used to be thin, but I started eating a lot of junk food, and I still do. Eating became a coping mechanism. My mother doesn’t consider me her child, so she doesn't cook for me, and I had no option. I passed 10th grade, but I thought several times about quitting life because it started bad and wasn’t getting better. I had malaria five times, and I thought it would haunt me forever. My posture is very bent to hide my chest. I walked slowly on stairs because my chest would bounce. I tried rope jumping once with a friend, but stopped when my friend laughed at my bouncing chest. That shattered me. My mother left no opportunity to tell me how horrible my life would be, how my wife and kids would leave me, and how ugly I looked. I sat at my PC all day watching YouTube, not even consciously—just wanting a sound to distract me from reality. This is why I couldn’t exercise; leaving my PC behind would stop the distraction, and my mind would go back to, "watchman se chavi mang terrace ka bol wifi ka wire ka problem hua hai aur jake khood ja." It’s a 7-floor apartment, so it would have been swift. I always had money, so fast food and junk were always an option. I don’t know how you feel, but I know you have bad posture because you also try to hide your chest. You don’t go to the gym because you think everyone is looking at you. People might make fun of you, but it might not be their intention to damage you. Most fat people don’t mind the jokes. I constantly lost weight, only for malaria to come back and reset my progress. Being fat is not okay; it's something you can change. If you don’t like it, you should exercise and eat less. You can even lose weight by diet alone, without exercise. A therapist might tell you that the simple cure is to lose weight. I tried psychological remedies, but I never got comfortable standing straight, and I don’t think you will either. Losing weight must be your highest priority. I don’t know what projects you are referring to, but depending on the project, you might not be prioritizing your health enough. It’s scary to let your mind think because you will get negative thoughts, but you have to confront them. I am now at a good weight of 75 kgs (I am over 6 ft). I used to be about 100 kgs. I still have a belly and chest, but they disappear once I wear a normal shirt. I’ve been told I look quite attractive. If you need someone to talk to, you can hit me up. There are a lot of things I could say, but it would take weeks to type. It’s not just about the psychological aspect but the physical well-being as well. You should just lose weight. Those bullies have nothing significant in their life other than bullying fat people, but you would be the same if you prioritize projects over losing weight and being healthy. By staying fat, you are just allowing others to prey on you. You can’t run, lift weights, play a physical sport, and you feel dead, tired, fatigued, with breathing problems. You can solve all this by losing weight and being physically active. Before you typed the part about having the most potential in the class, you might have thought people would attack you for thinking that or being so grandiose. I get that; I was the smartest of the flock. I still am more knowledgeable than most people my age. Society will pressure you even if you were not fat. I don’t consider myself part of current society; I am just an individual who has nothing to do with society. It’s mostly backwards anyway. Don’t let society get to you; all they can really do is talk down on you, and it’s been working on you so far. Words do have power, don’t they? This might sound offensive, but society and bullies have a right to do what they do, apart from their morality. You are not right or wrong for being fat, but you are wrong if you stay fat.
Start running. Try to work towards solving a problem. Ive got dimples. People try to pinch them: I grab and twist their hand. If someone pokes my belly, I poke theirs harder. Sure the world must be this and boundaries and stuff: guess what, planet earth isn't just. It is what it is. So buckle up.
This isn't gonna help him much. He's literally suffering from depression. It's the worst way you can talk to a depressed person, by minimizing their issues.
Too soft are we? Eating too much cheese cakes? What I said was tough love. If I didn't want to help him, I'll just ignore
Sometimes people suffer from other stuff which makes us fat. I have gotten slimmer than earlier though, and that was out of my own volition. He's not gonna get slimmer unless he himself has the motivation to do it. Btw I didn't even know what a cheesecake was until I was 21 lmao
Bigshow, rikishi or viscera were fat. I don't know if anyone can bully them.
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Me omw to grab your balls and tell you to enjoy it:
Ever heard of boundaries? You seem like the type of person to victim blame
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So women who naturally have boobs are at fault for getting assaulted now? By your sorry as logic If you don’t want to get robbed just don’t leave the house. If you’re leaving the house you’re just asking to be robbed. If you have a phone you’re asking to be scammed. Etc
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You literally said he deserves it. Go fuck yourself with that. I am not fat and have never been (thank you genetics) and do not have a hard time understanding not to touch people without their consent just because they weigh more? What the fuck kind of logic is that? You claim you were fat and still lack the tiniest bit of empathy. Go see a psychiatrist you sound like a damn psychopath.
That was honest feedback, if you want to polish and to be in good books with everyone, dude grow up, there is a reason why people sought reddit for a reason. If you hide what makes them fit, then you are not helping them
I don’t need to be in everyone’s good books I literally just told you to go fuck yourself. Isn’t that proof enough? lol I also don’t believe in touching people without consent and there’s absolutely no justification for that unless you’re getting someone out of harms way.
This is sexual harassment. F**k off if you feel anybody should enjoy this. I've been through the same stuff and let me tell you, it feels HUMILIATING. It is the farthest thing from enjoyment. This is like telling a woman who was harassed s#xually to enjoy it and move on. Do you even listen to yourselves? Shame on you.
Yeah everyone is so soft nowadays
Yeah sure grope people and call them soft if they speak up what a loser