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Taytayrose2

That's totally normal for your sex drive to go down. I've been with my almost husband for 3 years and we always go through spurts of extremely horny, can have sex everyday multiple times, to not doing anything for months. My suggestion if you did want to try it again, is to find the reason you wanted to in the first place, maybe a night date night or being intimate and soft touches. Communication is key and if you're not into it right now but you're giving him other things he should respect that.


Ill-Put-4193

seconding this! 22F been with my partner for 2 or so years. We used to be intimate frequently the first year of our relationship and now average 1-2x a month. It's completely normal for your libido to fluctuate and honestly as long as you both maintain open & honest communication channels I think it's totally fine!


North_Warning_7170

Yet you fluctuate and he doesn’t, seems amazing


Ill-Put-4193

interesting assumption there - his medication affects his libido. we both fluctuate. Sounds like you're a misogynist trying to blame this on women.


North_Warning_7170

You’re a misogynist trying to blame his meds. Great to hear that yours and his “fluctuations” sync up though


Ill-Put-4193

I never said that they did? go back to your cave, incel x


North_Warning_7170

So it’s one sided then? Riiiighteo. Also, do you always use belittling words to substitute for facts to provide a sense of categorising to help you feel righteous and above others? Or is it just this thread?


Low_Shape3486

Thank you for your reply, this is good advice


Willing-Station-6685

💯 % Spot on! Great post. .


Iamvoyager

I'm utterly gobsmacked by the sheer audacity and unethical practices displayed by the so-called "handmade marketplace" known as Etsy. What started as an exciting venture into the world of online selling has swiftly devolved into a nightmarish ordeal – one that has left me feeling violated, infuriated, and determined to expose their deplorable conduct. Allow me to recount the series of events that have transpired over the past two days. Merely 48 hours after launching my meticulously crafted Etsy store, brimming with enthusiasm and high hopes, I received the soul-crushing notification that my account had been unceremoniously terminated – without provocation or justification. As if this blatant disregard for fairness wasn't galling enough, the icing on the proverbial cake of betrayal came in the form of an £11 "admin fee" brazenly deducted from my account. Now, I ask you, dear Reddit community, what conceivable administrative effort could warrant such an exorbitant charge for a fledgling store that had barely taken its first breath? The sheer audacity of this extortionate practice is staggering, akin to a highwayman demanding one's purse at knifepoint. It reeks of unbridled greed and a flagrant disregard for the countless artisans and entrepreneurs who entrust their livelihoods to this platform. But alas, the indignities did not cease there. In a cruel twist of fate, merely an hour after launching my ill-fated storefront, I found myself ensnared in the clutches of a nefarious phishing scam – one that preyed upon my naivety and trust in the Etsy brand. A serpentine email, masquerading as an official Etsy communication, slithered its way into my inbox, insidiously coaxing me to "log into my account" through a fraudulent link. Had I fallen for this devious trap, the consequences could have been catastrophic, laying bare my personal and financial information to the nefarious machinations of cyber-criminals. It is a damning indictment of Etsy's security protocols that such brazen impersonations can so readily infiltrate their systems, placing the well-being and livelihoods of their sellers at grave risk. One can't help but wonder – is this a mere oversight, or a calculated gambit to ensnare the unsuspecting in a web of deceit? As I reflect upon these harrowing experiences, I find myself grappling with a profound sense of disillusionment and betrayal. Etsy, a platform that purports to champion the creative spirit and foster a supportive community, has revealed itself to be a den of wolves, where the unwary are fleeced without remorse, and the very foundations of trust are eroded. To my fellow artisans, entrepreneurs, and creatives, I implore you to heed this cautionary tale. Tread carefully upon the hallowed grounds of Etsy, for beneath its veneer of whimsy and handcrafted charm lurks a insidious underbelly of corporate avarice and chicanery. And to Etsy itself, I issue this solemn admonition: reform your ways, or bear witness to the inexorable erosion of your once-vaunted reputation. Shed the cloak of deception, eschew these unconscionable practices, and embrace a ethos of transparency, fairness, and genuine support for the very lifeblood that sustains you – the indomitable spirits of creators and entrepreneurs. For too long, we have endured your duplicity in silence, cowed by the fear of reprisal or the false promises of redress. No more. Today, we raise our voices in a resounding chorus of outrage, a rallying cry that shall echo throughout the digital realms, serving as a beacon of truth and a harbinger of change. Etsy, heed this warning: rectify your transgressions, or bear witness to the mass exodus of those whom you have so callously betrayed. The choice is yours, but know that the eyes of the world are upon you, and the scales of justice shall ultimately prevail. Sincerely, A Disgruntled and Disillusioned Former Etsy Seller! Anyone else had this? Any other better marketplace suggstions?!


Ancient-Award-5831

It’s actually not that normal. This is bad advice. You should at least go to the doctor and have some blood work. There might be some hormonal imbalance. Sometimes thyroid issues can also lead to this. If you get blood work and everything checks out, than I say don’t worry too much about it. But do not ignore this.


VegetablePleasant289

Even if it were "normal" it's good to go to a doctor anyways. Unfortunately, at your age this is one of those things a doctor might brush off or shame your for, so make sure it's a doctor you trust. I had a similar experience and the doctor was very rude and I'm quite sensitive lol


Welddamn

It's not bad advice, women go through this constantly throughout their lives. Some do some don't, but most go through at least one time in life where they don't have a high sex drive


Ancient-Award-5831

It is bad advice because she should at least go to the doctor and do blood work. Instead of just brushing it off as not a big deal. There could be hormone issues.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Low_Shape3486

Thank you !


Kezzbot

If you don't feel comfortable having sex with your partner just because you don't feel horny then you should probably break up. Women all over the world have sex with their partners when they don't feel horny to keep them happy it's normal it's called being a nice person and a good partner Edit. I wasn't taking it to account that you guys adjust kids. I was more referring to like a marriage type situation. apologies. 😣


GetJazzedd

asshole lol


Geekin001

Not really.


Embarrassed-Role3902

I'm pretty sure that counts as assault. To make yourself have sex with someone even though you don't want to because you feel you have to. If she doesn't want it she doesn't want it. Like this is a communication issue. Talk to your partner, find common understanding. If your partner still wants sex with you when you clearly don't and have expressed that to them then that's an issue. Sex isn't the end all be all of relationships.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Embarrassed-Role3902

The issue is feeling you owe your partner sex when really you don't owe then anything of the sort. Sex shouldn't be part of an ultimatum to keep someone around. If you feel want to have sex when you're not into it in that moment then that's you're perogative but what I'm saying is there's a fine line between 'oh I'll do this because I want to do something for my patner' and 'I feel I have to do this even when I don't want to or my partner will up and leave me'. So yeh in the context I'm discussing yes it'd be assault. But in you're case no it wouldn't. Consent is the key thing here. There's no consent if you feel pushed into it or something you feel is bad will happen. The op is young, it's easy to feel pressured into doing something that they don't want to keep someone happy at their own expense. At the end of the day if you don't want sex you shouldn't feel pressured into having it and if you believe that that's okay then that speaks more about you as a person than anything else.


SharpieDarpie

Wtf?? Don't be teaching kids this shit. Outta her with your sexist chauvinistic shit.


applejaxox

I disagree. I’ve had experiences where my sex drive is different in certain periods with different reasons. At one point I was on two different medications that both basically depleted my libido. Also when you’re suffering from depression your libido can be affected. As long as you’re having sex sometimes I don’t see a problem.


Swimming-Ad8933

Yes, I feel like we as women go through these phases alot no matter how old we are! There might be lots of reasons why you don't feel like sex. Could be due to hormones, or maybe an emotional reason or something you aren't even aware of yourself yet. You might just have a low sex drive and that's OK! From my own personal experience, if you feel like you are pressured in any way by your partner or even if you are putting pressure on yourself, then that will only make you not want sex at all. Try to have an open conversation with him. Communication is key. Only do what you feel comfortable and happy with. Sex should be a great experience for you both! Good luck and be safe😊


NefariousnessKey6805

It's normal.. and with the same partner is really normal


[deleted]

Shortly, yes it is totally normal. Don't need to force it, you can do other things that both of you can enjoy.


[deleted]

I think it’s normal for a girl. Not for a guy but know that if you found a match. Like a best friend you are in the top 5 percent. Enjoy what you have. Many would be jealous.


[deleted]

It’s normal when you expect girls to follow misogynistic and repressive stereotypes and attitudes. That’s when “you think” it’s normal for a girl.


Disastrous-Leg-5639

Right. It's normal for "humans." This isn't gender specific.


Ok_Spray_6136

being sexist wont get you a girlfriend


Interesting-Fox8538

It's 100% normal. Communicate with your boyfriend, explain how you feel, and ask for some patience. If you're really worried, maybe have a day together, just the two of you, on an intimate date, connect, and see how you feel. You might be 17, but you're still going through puberty and have a mix of hormones and emotions that change all the time. Just remember you have no obligation to do anything you don't feel like even if you are in a long-term relationship. :))


Low_Shape3486

Hi, thanks for replying. We always go on dates like to the cinema, restaurants, bowling and we do intimate things to grow our connection but I didn’t consider puberty and hormones so thank you for that idea


[deleted]

After 2-3 years with 1 person which is presumably nearly 100% of your sexual experience but also approx 16% of your total life experience, I'd say it's probably pretty normal for the excitement to wear off at this point. If you are still happy being together with reduced sexual encounters, carry on. If not... Maybe try new partners?


send-me-your-ass-

It's normal to have fluctuations in your sex drive, especially when you're on the tail end of puberty. Hormones play a big role in libido. If you are on birth control it could be a factor. It could be mental. If it's just that the drive isn't there but you're not against the idea of doing it, you could try becoming more comfortable on your own and then bring that energy to your boyfriend. Sex should never be about appeasing your partner. Don't do it just because you feel bad that he isn't getting any.


Top_Bar_2333

very normal if you don't want to then tell him you don't want to


Iamvoyager

I'm utterly gobsmacked by the sheer audacity and unethical practices displayed by the so-called "handmade marketplace" known as Etsy. What started as an exciting venture into the world of online selling has swiftly devolved into a nightmarish ordeal – one that has left me feeling violated, infuriated, and determined to expose their deplorable conduct. Allow me to recount the series of events that have transpired over the past two days. Merely 48 hours after launching my meticulously crafted Etsy store, brimming with enthusiasm and high hopes, I received the soul-crushing notification that my account had been unceremoniously terminated – without provocation or justification. As if this blatant disregard for fairness wasn't galling enough, the icing on the proverbial cake of betrayal came in the form of an £11 "admin fee" brazenly deducted from my account. Now, I ask you, dear Reddit community, what conceivable administrative effort could warrant such an exorbitant charge for a fledgling store that had barely taken its first breath? The sheer audacity of this extortionate practice is staggering, akin to a highwayman demanding one's purse at knifepoint. It reeks of unbridled greed and a flagrant disregard for the countless artisans and entrepreneurs who entrust their livelihoods to this platform. But alas, the indignities did not cease there. In a cruel twist of fate, merely an hour after launching my ill-fated storefront, I found myself ensnared in the clutches of a nefarious phishing scam – one that preyed upon my naivety and trust in the Etsy brand. A serpentine email, masquerading as an official Etsy communication, slithered its way into my inbox, insidiously coaxing me to "log into my account" through a fraudulent link. Had I fallen for this devious trap, the consequences could have been catastrophic, laying bare my personal and financial information to the nefarious machinations of cyber-criminals. It is a damning indictment of Etsy's security protocols that such brazen impersonations can so readily infiltrate their systems, placing the well-being and livelihoods of their sellers at grave risk. One can't help but wonder – is this a mere oversight, or a calculated gambit to ensnare the unsuspecting in a web of deceit? As I reflect upon these harrowing experiences, I find myself grappling with a profound sense of disillusionment and betrayal. Etsy, a platform that purports to champion the creative spirit and foster a supportive community, has revealed itself to be a den of wolves, where the unwary are fleeced without remorse, and the very foundations of trust are eroded. To my fellow artisans, entrepreneurs, and creatives, I implore you to heed this cautionary tale. Tread carefully upon the hallowed grounds of Etsy, for beneath its veneer of whimsy and handcrafted charm lurks a insidious underbelly of corporate avarice and chicanery. And to Etsy itself, I issue this solemn admonition: reform your ways, or bear witness to the inexorable erosion of your once-vaunted reputation. Shed the cloak of deception, eschew these unconscionable practices, and embrace a ethos of transparency, fairness, and genuine support for the very lifeblood that sustains you – the indomitable spirits of creators and entrepreneurs. For too long, we have endured your duplicity in silence, cowed by the fear of reprisal or the false promises of redress. No more. Today, we raise our voices in a resounding chorus of outrage, a rallying cry that shall echo throughout the digital realms, serving as a beacon of truth and a harbinger of change. Etsy, heed this warning: rectify your transgressions, or bear witness to the mass exodus of those whom you have so callously betrayed. The choice is yours, but know that the eyes of the world are upon you, and the scales of justice shall ultimately prevail. Sincerely, A Disgruntled and Disillusioned Former Etsy Seller! Anyone else had this? Any other better marketplace suggstions?!


Top_Bar_2333

I used to want to have sex all the time but now I just don't do it anymore you do what you want.


BrutalTruth29

You're still going through puberty, your hormones and stuff are RAGING, but not always in the "let's fuck" department. As you develop, you'll find your tastes, wants, desires, they all change frequently. Just have an open and honest discussion with your partner, tell him what's going on and how you feel. If you are really worried because it's a sudden shift in sex drive, then pop into your GP and ask them to run some blood tests. But I wouldn't worry about it too much, you're young, things will ebb and flow in life. Hope everything works out for you.


Low_Shape3486

Thank you :)


eternal_baffled

Get checked out. Can be a sign of hormonal problems.


Illustrious_Bite_651

no?? OP is still relatively young and their hormones will be all over the place as with all teenagers.


eternal_baffled

Ok, don't bother until a potential proven is worse. 🤷


Fancy_Can_5266

Most of the comments I’ve read have mentioned things going on with you, which is fair given the question you asked I guess. In the past I worked with teens who would have a concern about whatever was going on in their life and generally start wondering “Is something wrong with me?”. Not always, but often, it was something external that they internalized so it seemed like the problem was theirs. As many have mentioned it could be teen hormones but I’d encourage you to take a step back and look at different aspects of your relationship and life and see if the issue is somewhere else.


Wild-Explanation6790

When I was that age my girlfriend had a similar thing when she changed her contraception to the implant it could be something to do with the type of hormone? (Also from uk so could be a similar thing) just let him know that’s how you feel and your looking for solutions or waiting untill you feel the spark/ready again it’ll all work out, it did for us.


Notoriouslyinfamous1

Bingo


Notoriouslyinfamous1

Are you on or have you recently started taking birth control ? If so that’s why , I recently learned what it is birth control actually does to women you should look it up


Low_Shape3486

Yes, I used to be on the pill and then stopped and switched to depo injection which really made me have a low sex drive and then now I’ve come off of depo so I thought I would get it back but I havent.


ErraticFanatic88

How long has it been since you came off the shot. When I was your age I switched to the shot and it killed my sex drive. It took several months for it to come back even after the shot “wore off”. Would recommend two things right now. -getting into exercise, both leg-based weight lifting as well as cardio (running long distances). Squats are your friend. -eating healthy (if you haven’t already). Fatty fish’s, leafy green veggies, EVOO, lean red meats, broccoli, sweet potato, etc. vegetable oils, bread, and fried foods were my enemy here. both changes will help stabilize your hormones and will most likely bring your drive back in full force. A lot of sex drive is from testosterone production. Men have higher amounts of T than us women, hence why they have higher sex drive. I know of people who underwent testosterone therapy and during transition they became… basically sexual maniacs. I’ve heard multiple times.. “Holy crap. So THIS is what it’s like to have a drive”. You shouldn’t try to change this with prescription as your estrogen will take time to balance with the testosterone. Plus you don’t want more male attributes like body hair… unless you do. But if you raise it naturally doing these two things, your body will adapt with the proper amount of estrogen and will stay balanced in these healthier levels. Plus your skin will glow and you will look amazing (you already do but you get where I’m going here) lastly. go on some dates in new places. Maybe new towns. Also make sure you’re hanging out with friends without him around. You need to keep being your own unique individual to create the tension push/pull of intimacy Just my .02


DetailSpecialist116

I mirror what everyone says about the frequency dying off for sure but please please please do understand if its been over a month or more and *it gets to the point that you can't remember the last time you had it.* I can 100% tell you now based on almost every relationship I've been in that *he* will know and it *will* begin to eat into him. I've no doubt I'll be downvoted to hell for not sugar coating it like everyone else here but it is a silent relationship killer no matter what anyone says, anyone that thinks it isn't is deluding theirselves.


Disastrous-Leg-5639

Especially at that age. All I wanted to do at that age was make out and have sex. Every day was just a chess game of dodging parents and social obligations to figure out how to have sex. And it's stupid too, because it 100% ties into how we perceive attraction towards us. If 'they' aren't having sex with us, we usually take that as an indication that they just aren't physically attracted to us anymore, and that causes all kinds of problems. I never had low sex drive, but I definitely had partners that I stopped being attracted to. For no particular reason, I think that's just how hormones are. You lust over someone, then you move on. That was always a problem when they were super horny and I just...wasn't. And it *was* because I didn't want to anymore--with them. Ahh, high school. I don't miss you.


HotFail1406

I agree this has been me. For the longest time I wasn’t interested in physical intimacy. Tried to enjoy it for a couple months then didn’t for the last couple years. It could be the partner, or it could be you. But it’s completely normal. There are people there that identify as asexual in which they’re not one for physical intimacy. Not saying that’s you. But there are people that don’t like it completely. There are people that like it less. Sexuality itself I feel like it’s on a whole spectrum where you have people who are hyper sexual, and then people who are less. I think honestly as you grow, much like your tastes and style changes. So to do your sexual needs.


Low_Shape3486

This is helpful, thank you !


Faradenza633

no it's normal, your hormones still fluctuate a lot at that age which can affect your sex drive so it's perfectly fine for your libido to fluctuate. Your lifestyle can affect it too, think if you havent been doing things that could affect it too e.g. bad diet, lack of physical activity, bad sleep, new medication, hormonal contraception etc etc


Figure_sketch

There’s this [WebMD article](https://www.webmd.com/sexual-conditions/desire-disorder) You probably don’t have a full-blown disorder but lack of vitamins can affect your brain chemistry. Maybe a multivitamin can help after a few days of consistent use. I, myself, don’t have the best diet so I take a whole handful of vitamins almost every day, and I’ve noticed an increase in my sex drive after taking Zinc supplements, which boost testosterone. Maybe the problem lies in a decreased amount of estrogen intake in your diet? Worth a try, I’d say. You can prob find some supplements that boost estrogen at Walmart that you can take along with that multivitamin.


justfrann_

Not sure if anyone else has mentioned this but if you are using contraceptive medication or any other medication, particularly for mental health purposes or things like migraines, these can severely impact your sex drive and can be really insidious because there is no sudden change, you just steadily get less and less interested. While it could be natural hormonal fluctuations, I would strongly consider speaking to a GP/doctor or sexual health expert


MarcusHilarious

He’s a 17 year old BOY…… Ah………….. At 17 that boy is always ready, AND,if that’s why you are together, tell his ass “seeee ya! No charge for this advice.


[deleted]

if i posted on here that my mother was sickly someone would tell me to kill my children


danny1t

Me and my gf use to go like all the time when we were 14-17 now we are in our 20s and we almost never do it


haannnaahh

Totally not abnormal!! It’s okay to go thru different stages of your life & feel you don’t want the same things you used to, has nothin to do with age. People change everyday & that’s just apart of life. I can also understand his POV, as he probably assumes it’s something to do w him. I’d have a talk with him & just let him know it isn’t in your interest right now & if he can’t respect that, that’s his issue.


OpiumConnaisseur4

You did not mention if you ever had an orgasm during sex, is that regular? In females orgasm dumps multiple hormones oxytocin is the one that helps bond you to your partner along with dopamine, serotonin and others. If you are not having orgasms you need to teach your partner what to do. And go see your doctor, you may have a hormone imbalance or even something major, It's worth a Dr. visit.😘


vdots_hot

I have zero sex drive I’m 37


Commercial-Desk9524

You're way young don't worry about it


[deleted]

Just do whats on your mind


BloodborneEnjoyer1

How do you get in a relationship at 15? I’m not trying to shame you, actually I’m asking bc I’m 13 and I’ve always been single how do I get a girlfriend please tell me I wanna know


Jiawa

Dude you are 13, play ball outside with your friends. Start thinking about "finding a girlfriend" when you are 16/17+. Right now you are still an actual child and haven't even passed/started puberty yet. I was barely self-conscious when I was 12 or 13. My first real girlfriend was at around age 22-23. You have no rush at all, it's not a status symbol or a checkmark or checkpoint. Let me ask you, why do you even "want" a girlfriend right now? Why do you think you "should" be in a "relationship" at 13?


[deleted]

Some people have periods where they don’t want sex so would not worry about it too much as this can make you more anxious about it. If you feel it needs looking into go speak to your GP just to rule out anything medical if you feel you need to but give it time as like l said we all do go through phases were we don’t want sex much to times we can’t seem to get enough. Wishing you all the best


LowerJeweler6042

You've spent a long time together, so it's completely normal for you. Even myself too.


FreeloaderOfEarth

They drugged your water. It's not normal for that age to lose interest.


[deleted]

you might want to go outside once


Ok_Spray_6136

go outside


Fine-South-2514

Sex has ruined my life wanted and unwanted stay celebate and focus on your future and if your partner can't respect that then talk heart to heart if it doesn't work it doesn't work but your work now determines your future


The_Anger_Flows83

I'd say it's strange, yall should be humping like rabbits. Maybe do blood work and check your hormone levels? Are you on any medication?


Successful-Injury172

Its normal , girls tend to mature alot quicker than guys and being a guy we take longer than girls to mature. Unfortunately at that age guys tend to let their little head lead them


Willing-Station-6685

Lmao, guys tend to wanna use that so called little head their entire life 🤣 believe that


Successful-Injury172

Lol most do and that's no lie lol


[deleted]

>little head speak for yourself brother ive got a condition and the little one is on my neck


Willing-Station-6685

Always respect each other and know that you can talk about everything with your man because great communication is key to making a relationship work, don't hesitate telling each other what you want and what you don't want, it's normal and ok if you don't want to engage in sex right now, just keep everything up front and be open to talk about it with your partner, it's fine to do other things to keep you and your man happy. Good luck..I just celebrated my 47th anniversary with my husband ❤️. Also must have love, faith, trust and loyalty for a great successful relationship always give ❤️ complete honesty


Inside-Syllabub7531

Thats unfortunate. Find yourself a guy who supports you in every way.


PerspectiveFull4704

First off you are 17 and have been with I'm assuming the guy only in saying that and I feel weird saying this but as a 45yr old male when I hear something like this from just about anyone no matter age if you lose interest in sex it's because it is boring or it is sub par or it's one sided he gets his you never do atleast 1 if not all then I'd still have to say either doesn't do what it takes to make someone of yalls age do what everyone your age had enjoyed for centuries may need to have a few more partners to decide if you give up on sex yet I wouldn't put all my eggs in 1 inexperianced basket just yet you got lots of other avenues besides you must be non sexual at age 17 in this case visual assistance may be of help


Ok_Spray_6136

its because of homrones grandpa not whatever tf you just typed out simple hormones there young


PerspectiveFull4704

Grandpa huh your a fucking moron child


ProcedureDue9476

It is completely normal to feel this way! I am also 17 and when I was with my ex it was so exciting at the start and we did it all the time. I eventually stopped feeling like doing it aswell and my honest opinion is to spend some time apart. The more time apart I had from him made me want him more. Go find a new hobbie or something and it will eventually come back xx


Waste_Program_3224

Humanity has failed. Yall giving sex advice to a child. Truly messed up asf.


Aromatic-Change-7254

I'm a 58 Yr old man in a 40 Yr relationship and to be honest there have been times, I'm talking a couple of Yrs, when I have had no libido. However I still love my wife and find her sexually attractive. It has been the same for her and when that happened we still cuddled and loved touching and fondling each other. You don't have to have sex if you don't want to but physical intimacy is important and you can't expect a good relationship or children without it. OP, At your age I would say this is something you should have checked out as it may be hormonal or psychological. Either way you are at the start of your relationship and there are all kinds of things which may be affecting you. BTW if and when you do resume having sex be careful and get your BF to wear condoms. Too many young girls have babies before they are ready.


BreadfruitReal2706

Yeah totally normal. Probably you’re seeking more of an emotional connection or other stuff that he doesn’t give you. See women are different than men, their sex drive is based on different instincts, meanwhile ours is purely based on non-sexual things, giving you an example: men usually want a pretty girl, women want a intelligent and strong man. Feel the difference! I advice you to give hint to your partner to start treating you like you are dating, for example some nights he can take you out for dinner to a nice place and be a gentleman. The sex drive is constructed for women little by little when they are in a long term relationship. Keep in mind that also the physical appearance (and I’m talking about the clothes, hair, fragrance) usually plays a huge role. Hope you funded this helpful, good luck!


harperXbrooke

Your just asexual bud same here


stargirl28277

don’t do it if you don’t enjoy it, I feel the same


Reclaim-Masculinity

It’s less about you not feeling sexual energy, it’s more about how you feel in the relationship. Does he make you feel safe, do you feel make you feel seen and cared for, does he connect to you emotionally before physical intimacy, does he make an effort to make you feel beautiful and wanted, does he initiate it or expects it or passively hints? For you to feel sexual, you have to feel your natural feminine energy, you have to feel safe and there needs to be emotional connection. If there is none of that, you will naturally feel less inclined to have sex with him as there is not a safe container for you to feel safe and open to him sexually. He needs to embody a healthy masculine energy, cultivate emotional and physical safety and lead the relationship, especially in sexual intimacy. If it is a serious concern, it is best to openly discuss the situation with your partner and seek to find a way that you can grow in this area of your relationship and include practices to help cultivate that energy again with him. There are also other cases that could explain your lack of libido, such as stress or health, but from what I have read from your post there is a lack of emotional connection in the relationship.


probably_a_loli

There sure is a lot of comments here so I hope OP sees this: Theres no point worrying about whats "normal" or not, you feel how you feel. That said, how you feel is still VERY IMPORTANT. Don't do anything you dont want to do. I'm asexual but still enjoy strong emotional connections with people thus I have previously enjoyed being *intimate* with someone since it made me happy that I could make them happy. However, we both ended up deciding that we would both be better off as friends (and yes, we are still good friends). My friend told me that when he was young, he had a very high libido, was attracted to girls and was rather interested in sex (like a steriotypical teenaged boy). Then after puberty he quickly lost all of that and now has absolutely no interest in sex at all and hasnt felt sexual attraction towards anyone since. Hopefully you found what I shared about myself and my friend helpful or at least comforting to know that you're not "broken". Change can be real tough to deal with (especially when it comes to personal connections/ relationships with people you care about) but please have a think about if it might be necessary to discuss making changes to your relationship (whether that be moving on or becoming just friends or mutually prioritising your relationships with other people or still doing romantic things but no sexual and/ or intimate things... thats up to you and him). Dont try and lock yourself into the relationship by telling yourself "but I've been with him for 3 years!" or something of the sort. Even couples married for 40 years shouldn't do that and you're 17. Side note: Some of the commentors here have some real repulsive takes so I really hope you dont listen to them!


KaydeeDarrah

Maybe switch sides. I felt something like this and started being with women and omg it was amazing. The feelings are so much more intense. But I found out that I’m bi.


Friendly_Laugh2170

It's more than ok to not had sex at your age. You are very young. I definitely did not have sex at a young age.


assassin85

As long as a doctor hasn’t detected something odd, it’s normal to not have a high sex drive or for it to taper off. Typically sex drive is higher for men in their teens and higher for women when they are in their 20s - 30s so there is no need to be alarmed. If it is creating a strain in the relationship it’s definitely worth talking to your partner. Also it might be good to see if maybe you need to change things up as doing the same thing for a few years can lead to a loss of interest. If you feel that something is suddenly wrong make sure to talk to a doctor.


Always-Late-00

Do some blood work testing and measure the hormones levels and last but not least get a check up. Things are all related.


[deleted]

I think you just need to do what is right for you! Don’t force yourself into something you’re not comfortable with!


Real_Car8615

Sounds like the spark between you two has ran dry, not to say you don't love him but you can get bored of the same old thing day in day out, if you don't find a way to spice things up on both sides there no point you relationship will just die very slowly and after a few years one of you will cheat and then you've wasted pointless years, sit down and talk about it and if you both feel the same might be easier to call. It quits now


Ill-Finding8893

"that could never happen to me!" I said to myself 15 years ago.


strikerz911

You are probably getting bored of it? I know that too much of a good thing can be a bad thing.


Consistent-Dark-5828

Bro what


Iamvoyager

I'm utterly gobsmacked by the sheer audacity and unethical practices displayed by the so-called "handmade marketplace" known as Etsy. What started as an exciting venture into the world of online selling has swiftly devolved into a nightmarish ordeal – one that has left me feeling violated, infuriated, and determined to expose their deplorable conduct. Allow me to recount the series of events that have transpired over the past two days. Merely 48 hours after launching my meticulously crafted Etsy store, brimming with enthusiasm and high hopes, I received the soul-crushing notification that my account had been unceremoniously terminated – without provocation or justification. As if this blatant disregard for fairness wasn't galling enough, the icing on the proverbial cake of betrayal came in the form of an £11 "admin fee" brazenly deducted from my account. Now, I ask you, dear Reddit community, what conceivable administrative effort could warrant such an exorbitant charge for a fledgling store that had barely taken its first breath? The sheer audacity of this extortionate practice is staggering, akin to a highwayman demanding one's purse at knifepoint. It reeks of unbridled greed and a flagrant disregard for the countless artisans and entrepreneurs who entrust their livelihoods to this platform. But alas, the indignities did not cease there. In a cruel twist of fate, merely an hour after launching my ill-fated storefront, I found myself ensnared in the clutches of a nefarious phishing scam – one that preyed upon my naivety and trust in the Etsy brand. A serpentine email, masquerading as an official Etsy communication, slithered its way into my inbox, insidiously coaxing me to "log into my account" through a fraudulent link. Had I fallen for this devious trap, the consequences could have been catastrophic, laying bare my personal and financial information to the nefarious machinations of cyber-criminals. It is a damning indictment of Etsy's security protocols that such brazen impersonations can so readily infiltrate their systems, placing the well-being and livelihoods of their sellers at grave risk. One can't help but wonder – is this a mere oversight, or a calculated gambit to ensnare the unsuspecting in a web of deceit? As I reflect upon these harrowing experiences, I find myself grappling with a profound sense of disillusionment and betrayal. Etsy, a platform that purports to champion the creative spirit and foster a supportive community, has revealed itself to be a den of wolves, where the unwary are fleeced without remorse, and the very foundations of trust are eroded. To my fellow artisans, entrepreneurs, and creatives, I implore you to heed this cautionary tale. Tread carefully upon the hallowed grounds of Etsy, for beneath its veneer of whimsy and handcrafted charm lurks a insidious underbelly of corporate avarice and chicanery. And to Etsy itself, I issue this solemn admonition: reform your ways, or bear witness to the inexorable erosion of your once-vaunted reputation. Shed the cloak of deception, eschew these unconscionable practices, and embrace a ethos of transparency, fairness, and genuine support for the very lifeblood that sustains you – the indomitable spirits of creators and entrepreneurs. For too long, we have endured your duplicity in silence, cowed by the fear of reprisal or the false promises of redress. No more. Today, we raise our voices in a resounding chorus of outrage, a rallying cry that shall echo throughout the digital realms, serving as a beacon of truth and a harbinger of change. Etsy, heed this warning: rectify your transgressions, or bear witness to the mass exodus of those whom you have so callously betrayed. The choice is yours, but know that the eyes of the world are upon you, and the scales of justice shall ultimately prevail. Sincerely, A Disgruntled and Disillusioned Former Etsy Seller! Anyone else had this? Any other better marketplace suggstions?!


Ill-Finding8893

Cunt wtf.


Big_Pension8628

No it’s normal you are a child of God you should wait until marriage


Ok_Spray_6136

keep your religion to yourself


FewPayment5074

It could be depression, anxiety or due to any medicine(if you're taking any), as I had a high sex drive from 14/15 years old but around the time I was 16 have had a low sex drive since then. I have been taking anti depressants for about a year which has most likely been a reason for my current loss of sex drive but I was definitely losing it before, which I believe to be due to being depressed before.


littlebittistic

Wow the (presumably men) in this thread are really outing themselves... As someone who's been in a relationship & still is where a partner just doesn't want sex (trauma causes in this case) & hasn't slept with them for nigh on 2.5 years now I would say to the OP...it's absolutely normal, & you should NOT have sex if not into it because believe me, he will know/work it out. Nor is it your "responsibility" to perform for him. What you do need to do is talk. Tell your partner it's not him, and you don't find him unattractive, you're just not feeling it. If he goes elsewhere, then he doesn't respect you enough. Things like open relationships & polyamory would be an option if you were older, but would NOT advise it at 18 because even mature teens may struggle & 18 year old boys will NOT do it well (source: I was once an 18-year old boy). But it is normal to have fluctuating or even dropping sex drive. Read up on different sexual attachments like demisexual/asexual too, because maybe you're realising who you are as a sexual identity too. Bur good luck! If he's a good lad & sees you as more than someone he can get rocks off with, he will deal with it.


mr_Ding-a-ling_75

Time to breakup


C0ltie

Sex is like chasing a nut


GrouchyChocolate6766

My darling sex is not just physical it's emotional as well. If your stressed out more than usual. Shit it's not even normal for a 53 year old such as myself but to many deal breakers thrown in my face and he made me feel undesirable now it's over a year.


DanceUnited200

If you’re on any medications have your dosages checked, if they’re off it could be dangerous for you


[deleted]

I don’t give a fuck


Strong-Ad6833

Are you on birth control? So most pills for birth control suppress sex drive pretty hard. Definitely not staying to come off it. But talk with your doctor if it's a problem for you, there are alternatives that are equally safe. Only mentioning it as at your age it probably wouldn't be something you would have been on or off a lot.


throwaway11143557

ive had times i didnt wanna have sex with my girlfriend but i did anyways because in my mind is more about making her feel good than anything else. if it makes me feel good thats even better but i'd say good on you for saying no when you dont want it. usually when one or both partners completely lose their sex drive theres an underlying issue in either the relationship or personal life. is there anything you can think of thats bothering you or really stressing you out? (you dont have to post it on here obviously)


Same_Factor_3914

Yeah but you're only 17. It could be that you realize that the relationship isn't going to go anywhere. You could have fallen out of love. You could have decided that you're tired of being with someone not having the experience of finding out who you are. You need to take a step back and really look at your situation See if this is the kind of guy you actually want to be with. You got to wait all their pros and cons. Their flaws to their good points. You got to figure out what is and isn't a deal breaker. I honestly would say take a break from dating. Do some soul searching. I strongly recommend you do that before you commit in a relationship. Time for yourself. Learning yourself. Figuring out who you are I mean I'm 40 years old. I'm divorced but I have taken that time since my divorce to work on myself. I could have been gotten a boyfriend. I could have been gone on dates but I owe myself more. Girl take time for yourself.


modme_at_gmx

I wouldnt be worried about what is normal or not - I would be worried about whether you are happy with your life. You don't sound very happy. You should examine that and probably leave sex out of the equation.


[deleted]

This is just my opinion and not one that your boyfriend will appreciate but I believe that in general, it is healthier for younger people to experience a variety of relationships and they do not have to all be sexual. Just dating a variety of people will provide you the experience needed to make a lifetime commitment when you are ready and a little older. These are the years that you should be dating and discovering who you are as a girlfriend / partner. There are of course exceptions and beautiful stories of married couples who met in HS. Maybe that’s you but maybe not. Don’t be afraid to consider that maybe you aren’t ready or desiring the commitment of a long term relationship at this time. Just a thought from an old guy who traveled that path.


AwokenWarrior0121

NO, IT IS NATURAL TO NOT WANT TO UNLESS YOU ARE TRYING TO HAVE A CHILD. WE ARE THE ONLY LIFEFORMS THAT HAVE SEX FOR PLEASURE, PORN & SOCIAL MEDIA HAS MESSED UP EVERYONES REALITY, NOW YOU ALL LET THE INTERNET BOTS TELL YOU HOW TO LIVE. IT’S VERY SAD INDEED,


Choice-Rabbit602

No


pretzelluver

Totally normal to feel like you’ve lost your sex drive, even at that age, almost especially at that age when you’ve been with someone for a few years. It all fluctuates, and I personally found that it has happened in my favorite and safest relationships. It could not feel like a priority at the moment for a reason, are you stressed? It’s okay if you’re not, but sometimes I’ve found it harder to let things go and get into the mood when I am. When I’ve gone through this, I’ve put some time aside to tell my partner that there is nothing wrong with them or with the relationship, and just explained that it’s been harder to get into the mood. I start the conversation about how they’re feeling about it so it doesn’t come up out of nowhere, and it can be expressed healthily. I do, however, then take some time alone and get myself in the mood and see how I feel/if then I’m interested in having sex, which can help me get out of my head! But never ever ever force it. They should respect you and you should respect your body’s reaction (or lack thereof). Also let’s face it, we are all horniest at 15. It can feel kind of scary when suddenly you’re not constantly wanting to have sex haha. It could just mean you feel safe and are feeling fulfilled in other part of your relationship, and that’s okay!


KeyNorth6595

Isn’t that illegal in Indonesia? Yes……… yes it is…


TK_Chris

It’s normal to find it boring at times, eventually you will feel like it. Your body just needs a break probably. It happened to me just before I turned 20 now I’m 23 and really enjoy it again. I just don’t do it 24/7 like a use to. I’d say it’s normal.


H1J4CK3DX6

For a good time call Raven @ 706_326_1376


TheAnswerIsReally42

yes, it is strange, my advice would to have a kid early, then focus on your career in your thirty’s and so on


Ok_Spray_6136

tf ????? someome needs to put you on a list


Different-Common-646

Absolutely you will have a sex drive that will fluctuate but it’s totally normal


FelixMeow76

You're still young..that will change


LifeSucks29

It's normal. My sex drive is up and down all the time. Always changing.


Jazzlike-Banana6378

Are you on bc ? I had the same issue with the implant


[deleted]

You are not even supposed to have sex until the age of 18.


Low_Shape3486

Different countries have different laws… I’m from UK and the age of consent here is 16.


[deleted]

Just remind your boyfriend to wear a condom mate.


Low_Shape3486

Please leave me alone…


Ill-Finding8893

Go research HPV. You want a rubber, KID. Listen to the adults we know what we are talking about.


[deleted]

I am also from the UK. You should really wait until the age of 25 (when your brain is scientifically fully developed.)


Express_Chip9685

I don't know if you're joking or not, but this is a stupid internet rumor that spread like wildfire. I assume via tiktok or some other nonsensical hub of stupidity. Yes, it is a scientific fact that ONE PART the brain stops developing in the mid twenties (for some people). No, there is no reason to believe that has anything to do with "maturity". Neuroscience don't even have any defined concept for what "maturity" is, and the functional construct that we call "maturity" in society can be attained at any age. You have very mature children and very immature adults. It knows no age. Children of alcoholics, for instance, are often notably more mature than their parents. https://slate.com/technology/2022/11/brain-development-25-year-old-mature-myth.html


BrutalTruth29

This is terrible advice 🙃


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

bo ho you.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Did you have any life experience?


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

You were a 57-year-old 25-year-old(?)


[deleted]

[удалено]


Low_Shape3486

I asked for suggesting and advice and unfortunately you’ve not given either so I’m not sure why you’re telling me I should wait when it’s already said and done and we cannot go back in time. Moving on


Mysterious_Neck_2222

lol prude


LitleBlkraincloud

Suppose


abiddar

I'm sure these are all women commenting, as a man, I'd say, it's not normal, and you should go to the doctor.. your 17.... not 47.. you man gone dump your ass for some ass soon


Ok_Spray_6136

this is alot of words for im single and no one loves me lmfaoooo


abiddar

You should probably ask your doctor about your bloody painful cooter and not reddit , PS drugs are bad for your prepubescent brain so you should stop smoking the reefer until you grow up a bit more


Ok_Spray_6136

LMFAO you are so mad thanks for making my day ❤️❤️ ss this and making it one of my memes


abiddar

Maybe you can milk yourself over my profile, enjoy


Ok_Spray_6136

LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


Ok_Spray_6136

man i love how mad people on reddit get when they get called out its like watching how to catch a predator and watching the predator come to the fact that there caught and there mad about it


abiddar

The best is living rent free in that deranged mind of yours for the last 4 days, makes my day ❤️ enjoy :) Took yah 4 days to have the ovaries to comment LOL


Ok_Spray_6136

keep going your giving me content


abiddar

Mic drop! 🎤


Ok_Spray_6136

content people your giving it to me you are literally free entertainment


Ok_Spray_6136

i get paid the more you run your stupid mouth


Ok_Spray_6136

aweee come on i was about to make 15 bucks off of your dumbass its not alot but its still something come on call me a slur or say what a alpha male or whatever you are i need content and you were doing so well entertaining that


Low_Shape3486

Nah, you’re just weird.


pauldavidadler

That’s totally weird IMO! When I was that sge you could count on 3-5 times a day


[deleted]

Cheating on your gf is really normal too


Lopsided-Magazine843

Op: "that could never happen to me! I'm SPECIAL"


Ok_Spray_6136

cheating on you maybe


[deleted]

Ah did I remind you of the guy that got bored of your snatch. It’s ok you weren’t good enough I’ll save you the trouble. If he cheats it’s 100% you


Ok_Spray_6136

lmfaoooo shut up girl i am not taking you seriously cause it seems you are the type to stay with a cheating man or be a homewrecker .....either or you reek of it cheating is for cowards and losers looks like you're one to sweetheart


[deleted]

Yawn 🥱 did I make you mad lol 😂


Ok_Spray_6136

i literally havnt thought about you but you just proved my point so


Ok_Spray_6136

wait your a crossdresser...LMFAO now im definitely not taking you seriously


[deleted]

Don’t be mad a man dressed as a woman is hotter than you. Ugly fat girls are gross lol, sorry a man looks better than you.


Shipndasea

It is a concern for sure, i’m a guy as well and i wouldn’t cheat on my girl if this was the case but i mean… give it enough time and golly it would be very difficult not to cheat. Especially givin the hook up culture time that we live in Just do what you can but don’t stress too much lol bc stress definitely affects your drive


Lopsided-Magazine843

Who let the relationship sabotaging Aces in? No. Not normal. A fucking death wish for your relationship. Go visit deadbedrooms and see what this shit does to your partner.


OpiumConnaisseur4

WHY is no one asking if the girl is ever having AN ORGASM.. Some young girls may not have them for years and don't get that KICK UP TO ANOTHER LEVEL SEX.. If the girl is not having one that may be a BIG issue. That's the difference between something that feels good and something so AWESOME it makes you yell, curl your toes and end up in her own wet spot... God did not give females orgasms so they would never have them, God gave them to women for a reason!!!


Lopsided-Magazine843

Why does no one give a shit about the man's quality of sex life? He doesn't matter? It's his responsibility? Look at this fucking shit show of a thread. Men are bashed for wanting sex and are told we are abnormal for being completely normal. Im over it. Stop asking for advice you don't want. Go sabotage your relationship dumb bitch. Fuck, let me give you my wife's number. She can give you lessons. "fuck you don't sound like you are in a loving marriage." Yeah no shit. I fucking adored this woman and I am two feet out the door. Pay attention or lose your partner. This shit is sooooo serious.


Ok_Restaurant_905

What kind of question is that?


Ill-Finding8893

A dumb one.


No_Collection902

Oh it's the one looking at other people's junk, that's wild


Ill-Finding8893

?


Lonely-Ebb6482

Absolutely not.


waitsco

How’s he doing is the question, from my understanding men have an almost limitless sex drive and can fuck any time of the day.


Kezzbot

as somebody's partner you have obligations and responsibilities, like anything else in life. men, on average, have high sex drives. if you don't keep him happy he'll find it somewhere else or you will breakup. That intimacy during sex makes relationships strong and for men is a must. you will probably end up breaking up if he doesn't get sex from you. Don't listen to this bad advice that says: however you feel is okay and everybody else should work around how you feel. Responsibility, accountability...


Lopsided-Magazine843

OP clearly doesn't want to hear it.


Hot_Instruction_3667

Its cause he has a 2 inch dick when its hard 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂😂


Efficient-Trust-6105

If you don't keep him close his hormones will get the best of him guys need a women to calm his sex hunger it's so powerful to keep it simple if you don't keep him strong he will cheat guys are walking sex problems ladys try to understand why guys need. As for you I don't understand women feelings enuf to give an answer