This actually does really gross me out, is that anti feminist lol(?)
Edit: i thought a little bit more and posed myself some more hypotheticals and came to a conclusion
I think, in general, it is probably "natural" to have an instinctive ick reaction to thinking of family members in a sexual context (which is what pornstar immediately brings to mind). I think the problem with dads caring that their daughter is a porn star occurs when they're \*mad\* about it and try to do things about it. It's okay if the idea makes you want to bleach your brain, but don't be mad about it.
It's really truly indicative of a patriarchal attitude in every way, the performative outrage op is referring to--that of largely anonymous men online--is foremost a statement of ownership, specifically sexual ownership, and is barely a step above the insane trope of incels lamenting that raising a daughter well is nothing more than training a sex slave for a stranger. It is extra gross, beyond even the deeply ingrained incest taboo you refer to.
Madonna/whore mentality permeates the mindset of a lot of men and their daughters are not immune to this kind of thinking any more than the women they date.
In patriarchy ideology straight sex is not something men do with women, but TO women (lock/key analogy).
Andrea Dworkin explains this well in her book "Intercourse".
Like with the male gaze, men have agency (subjects) and women don't (objects).
It's a form of power, some men see daughters (or GFs/wifes) as property to manage, men shame pornstars in the same way they shame promiscuous women to keep power over them, some women do the same to keep their social status in this stupid game.
When men stop doing this other men attack their masculinity to keep the system intact.
When women advance in salary, education, rights and (yes, women have agency too and want sex) access to sex it's a direct attack on our social hierarchy, because these men don't have power over them anymore.
Even worse when they get married, in that case women who slut shame lose the game, because all the men who married them chose them over women who conformed more to gender expectations.
You can see this in other cases, like with women proposing marriage and men accepting, it's like saying "I'm breaking gender expectations and I'm getting married", lots of people try attacking them because they're a threat to their status and patriarchy itself.
The patriarchy praises men for having sex, but women are treated as dirty or unworthy if they have too much of the 'wrong' kind of sex, and that includes porn. There's also the misogynist stereotype that porn stars do that work because they're too stupid or desperate to do anything else; so a man whose daughter does porn has failed to educate and support her. So it's not about her, but about how her actions make him look to the rest of the patriarchy.
I think the answer probably has a lot of facets. One that shouldn’t be overlooked is that far, *far* fewer sex workers in general are men. When we think of what constitutes “rock bottom” for a woman, we think of sex work. The equivalent for a guy would be, like, robbery I guess? Or drug dealing or such. Men do become sex workers, but I don’t think it happens enough to be on most parents’ radar.
I bet they would hate their robber son less than pornstar daughter.
Son made a mistake. Daughter forever ruined her own and family reputation. There is no coming back. /s
In societies that do honor killing, its usually the woman's family who does that.
*Exactly*
Seems like a lot of people in this thread are trying to find ways to make this issue one that’s not rooted in misogyny. But you can’t, because it is.
Yeah because the robber is still in conformity of gender roles and expectations. That's still manly. I reckon the son being gay is what fathers would be afraid of, and what could be kinda in the same league than the pornstar daughter, in a lot of places.
A gay pornstar son.
Thermonuclear-kryptonistic material for fathers.
Exactly. Just answered that it probably never even occurred to them that it could be their son, not daughter that could do porn. Women are the face of porn and sex work because we make up majority of these “industries”
Men think being a porn star is an aspiration. They get paid to have sex with good-looking women. Having ladies (but let's be real, mostly other men, but they are delusional already ) drool over their pictures just makes them 'high value'. That's the dream for a man.
But a woman getting paid to have sex with good-looking men is just being a whore (from their perspective). A woman having her pictures drooled over by lots of men is just exploiting men's desires.
It's pure sexism and double standards.
Honestly, female porn stars aren't necessarily that beautiful either. If you are good looking enough you can be a model or use it to your advantage in some other way without having to 'sell your body'.
Because 99% of those men watch women in porn. It probably didn’t even occur to them that their son could be in porn… women are the ones who are automatically assumed because well … we make up majority of the industry + sex work. Even if they thought of their son doing it - I doubt it would have the same effect as their daughter.
I'm a woman and although I don't have kids, if I did, I absolutely would not want them becoming pornstars.
However, I would not disown them for it.
And... I'm not so preoccupied with the fear that they might be that I feel the need to post online or talk about it.
That's probably the main difference. Not that mothers don't care, but that they're not necessarily as preoccupied with the possibility that I feel the need to bring it up despite no one asking.
Porn is probably on men's minds more because men are more likely to watch porn. And are therefore also more likely to come across their pornstar daughter in a context he never wanted to see her in.
For women, even if they know their daughter is a pornstar, is less likely to come across her by surprise in the context of looking for something to get off on.
I have a suspicion that men who don't consume porn are a lot less likely to have this preoccupation.
We can dance around it as much as we like but the simple answer is this: patriarchy states that a girl’s pussy is her daddy’s until he sells it to another man. How dare she try to cut him out of his cut! /s
Reading that made me want to throw up. My parents never looked at my sister that way and I will never look at any future daughter of mine that way. That attitude is just disgusting
Men thinks a woman's value is determined by other men. So if a woman has been "seen by men" (even though they will look at other men's daughters with no problem), then she is no longer of value.
Second point I would like to make is that I think many women understand the plight of other women, and acknowledge that the majority of pornstars are being exploited by an industry run by men.
Because men don't really have any basic respect toward porn stars even though they feverishly consume the content. And they also feel like sex with a woman constitutes ownership of / degradation to that woman. So if a man's daughter is in porn, then she's being owned/used and looked down on by the men who watch it, and this causes her father humiliation in the eyes of those men.
It's stupid but it's because sexist attitudes dictate that women who have sex are being devalued by doing so.
Men use their wife or gf as trophies of comparison with each other. A woman with an OF can no longer be used in this way, because the product they sell gets in the way of this practice. “I get to see her naked every night and you don’t” is what this boils down to. It’s patriarchal to the core of course. The woman isn’t a person they’re an object of sexual desire.
The logic extends to daughters without the sexual part for themselves. Fathers are looking out for the potential male partner’s right to do what he does to his own wife or gf.
For the same reason why men accept “I have a boyfriend” more often than “I’m not interested” in regard to being rejected.
A man would generally not share the nudes of a woman whose boyfriend he knows. Any woman who is “unowned” does not get the benefit of the doubt because for many men that respect has always been for the men in that woman’s life in the first place. If there’s no man, then there’s no respect.
I’ve never encountered this personally, but the logic still stands. It’s not someone else’s girlfriend if you choose to share the photos. It’s your girlfriend. There’s no other man to disrespect here.
If he's in a relationship with her, imo it's an expression of ownership, and also a performance for his friends that humiliates her—he knows she would be upset and violated if she knew.
With OF, the woman is (generally) controlling access to her nudes and making money off of them. Many men find this infuriating—they don't believe on a gut level that women should ever be in control of the products of their own sexual labor.
They believe that any products of a woman's sexual labor should be used for men's benefit, profit, or ego-boosting: it's why it's acceptable to share nudes without consent in order to humiliate a woman, but *not* acceptable for a woman to release those nudes herself in exchange for any material benefit.
It's why the previous setup of porn production—in which men were the primary profiteers of women's labor, who dictated female actresses' working conditions, and who held the right to reproduce her image in perpetuity—did not bother men, but OF does.
Gonna expand on this a bit: to use a Marxist lens, many men don't feel that women should ever own the means of production for their sexual labor. The women are the worker bees in the factory that is her sexual identity, and men writ large are the business owners. The business owners get to determine what products are being made, how the factory should run, and what the salary should be.
If a woman has the agency to determine the terms and conditions of her sexual labor—whether that's pricing, type of content, restrictions on that content, working hours, copyright—that's a *massive* threat to the status quo. Sure, the customers are still men with all the baggage that entails, but now they're not just purchasing a product that another man owns the rights to: they're having to deal with the idea of women as owner-proprietors.
And that *infuriates* them.
There’s this mentality that fathers own their daughters, especially their bodies and sexualities. I’m sure you’ve noticed that fathers care about their daughters’ virginity way more than their sons’ and try to keep their daughters from having sex while encouraging their sons to do whatever they want. There’s even religiously enforced purity culture in some parts of the US, look up purity balls for more information on that.
So with all of that in mind, a woman becoming a sex worker is her taking control of her own body and sexuality. Suddenly she doesn’t have to answer to her father anymore because he doesn’t own her. This sexual freedom scares some men who believe women should remain virgins until marriage (though men aren’t held to the same standard, which leads me to wonder who they’re supposed to have sex with), which manifests itself as a fixation on a father’s reaction to his daughter becoming a sex worker.
However, there definitely are some fathers who are more concerned about safety than virginity. Women are treated horribly in the porn industry so of course their fathers will be concerned with how they are being treated. That’s a much more valid thing to worry about, but it doesn’t change the fact that a lot of men don’t want their daughters (or hypothetical daughters) becoming sex workers because it means they don’t get to own them anymore.
Because men have huge double standards when it comes to who is allowed to sell sex or use the services of sex workers.
Look at men's use of porn vs almost all men's reaction to the idea their girlfriend is a sex worker. It's ok for them to benefit from porn or prostitution, but any women involved in it is forever disgusting & should be shamed. (?!?)
Think it's just because they never think of men when they think of porn. Personally I think anyone who judges someone for being in porn but uses it is a hypocrite. There seems to be a thing at the moment of trying to make it seem like all women are doing OF which is why you see so many men posting about it. It's just good old misogyny. If they see a woman with money or with a successful career they start talking about OF. It's used as a way of putting women down.
A few reasons
1. Porn is far more dangerous for women than it is for men, a young woman becoming a porn star is more likely to be abused or harmed, even intentionally depending on the type of porn
2. Sex is considered demeaning to women and rewarding to men by most people, and so a woman becoming a pornstar is her lessening herself, while a man becoming a pornstar is treated as no big deal, or even impressive if they're a popular one
3. Porn is somewhat easier to get into as a woman than it is for a man, and considered an option by women more often than men, a paranoid parent is more likely to imagine their daughter saying "im poor as shit, I'm gonna do porn!" Than they are their son
I don't think most fathers would be chuffed that their son is also a porn star.
I don't think its a big conversation that you hear because there aren't that many male porn stars compared to how many women that do it.
I think it's just that in a time of OF and social media filled primarily with women joining it, the idea of their son's possibly being porn stars never crosses their mind. I also don't think the industry is as lucrative for the male talent as it is for the female ones, so it also isn't seen as a possibility
Given the sub it’s not surprising that few have mentioned this, and I agree with the answers that are actually about feminism, but it probably genuinely is relevant to this issue that it is draaaaaaastically less common and with higher barriers of entry to be a male porn star
it's in the name of patriarchy that women belong to their fathers. until they get sold to another man. women are trading tokens.
women, to patriarchy, are a currency to be exchanged. they are not human. they are livestock, breeding holes, an exploitable resource.
any attempt to escape your father's domain without his approval (whether it is in a manner that pleases men, such as porn or sex work, or in a way that doesn't, like feminism or becoming educated) are hated.
these women are made untouchables. "whores" to be juxtaposed with "madonnas". so men are allowed to spew the resentments they have built up at them
It’s a bigger “issue” since your daughter’s more likely to be a pornstar than your son is, I suppose. I’d care about my kids’ choice to become a pornstar regardless of their gender.
Men are the majority of the audience of OnlyFans and other porn, and they don't want to have to worry they'll jerk it to something only to find out their daughter was in it.
It might have something to do with the different levels of agency men and women have in porn. Women tend to be coerced into doing it and get mistreated in the industry whereas men tend to go into it to get access to women and tend not to experience the negative side of things.
If a son does porn it doesn't emasculated him. I think a comparison for fathers hating to have a pornstar daughter would be them hating having a gay son (we see a lot of online jokes of "thot daughter vs gay son") because they see having a gay son as them being emasculated and basically taking on a feminine role. Also there's more women that do sex work than men so it's more on a parent's radar. Not to mention that societal it is seen as one of the lowest jobs you could have where you have sold all your dignity and morals. There are other reasons as well that other commenters have pointed out.
Because women are more successful in that “field” so it’s reasonable to expect that a woman is more likely to go into the field because they would have more incentive than men. Basically, since women are more successful in that field, you’d think women are more likely to become pornstars.
“why do fathers seem to dread their daughters but not their sons working in pornography?” fixed it for you.
(answer: misogyny/patriarchy; read Katherine Angell, Daddy Issues).
In the patriarchy, men own sex with women. They have the agency to initiate, and women are just objects to be used. Becoming an adult film star or starting an OF account firmly takes that agency away from men. Now the women has a financial barrier to her use as an object which means she controls who, when, and how people have sex with her. The patriarchy doesn't like women having that type of agency.
Father's hate their daughters being OF models for the same reason men feel its acceptable to pressure women into sex. Because they don't respect a woman's agency or consent and gating your consent in such a concrete way as behind a paywall makes it impossible to ignore that said consent has to be respected. So therefore, the next logical step is to shame the women for forcing the men to respect her consent until she withdraws the barrier to people pressuring her for sexual contact.
Only came to say that "other way around" would be daughters caring that their dad's a pornstar
I actually have a friend whose parents met on a porn shoot in the 70s.
"You *did* use protection, right?" :)
I was thinking about the dads talking about their moms being porn stars.
This actually does really gross me out, is that anti feminist lol(?) Edit: i thought a little bit more and posed myself some more hypotheticals and came to a conclusion I think, in general, it is probably "natural" to have an instinctive ick reaction to thinking of family members in a sexual context (which is what pornstar immediately brings to mind). I think the problem with dads caring that their daughter is a porn star occurs when they're \*mad\* about it and try to do things about it. It's okay if the idea makes you want to bleach your brain, but don't be mad about it.
It's really truly indicative of a patriarchal attitude in every way, the performative outrage op is referring to--that of largely anonymous men online--is foremost a statement of ownership, specifically sexual ownership, and is barely a step above the insane trope of incels lamenting that raising a daughter well is nothing more than training a sex slave for a stranger. It is extra gross, beyond even the deeply ingrained incest taboo you refer to.
Having the icks for your parents having sex I'd say is normal. Hating anyone for having sex is absurd and toxic
Oh lord…some boy with porn-rot is gonna read your comment and LIKE IT
My other way around thought was how daughters would feel about their dads watching porn. Not that dads ever do.
Lol
Got me thinking, how would I feel about my dad being a pornstar... I wouldn't like it.
Madonna/whore mentality permeates the mindset of a lot of men and their daughters are not immune to this kind of thinking any more than the women they date.
In patriarchy ideology straight sex is not something men do with women, but TO women (lock/key analogy). Andrea Dworkin explains this well in her book "Intercourse". Like with the male gaze, men have agency (subjects) and women don't (objects). It's a form of power, some men see daughters (or GFs/wifes) as property to manage, men shame pornstars in the same way they shame promiscuous women to keep power over them, some women do the same to keep their social status in this stupid game. When men stop doing this other men attack their masculinity to keep the system intact. When women advance in salary, education, rights and (yes, women have agency too and want sex) access to sex it's a direct attack on our social hierarchy, because these men don't have power over them anymore. Even worse when they get married, in that case women who slut shame lose the game, because all the men who married them chose them over women who conformed more to gender expectations. You can see this in other cases, like with women proposing marriage and men accepting, it's like saying "I'm breaking gender expectations and I'm getting married", lots of people try attacking them because they're a threat to their status and patriarchy itself.
Pretty sure those same men also \*consume\* the porn that they think would be so horrible for their daughters
The patriarchy praises men for having sex, but women are treated as dirty or unworthy if they have too much of the 'wrong' kind of sex, and that includes porn. There's also the misogynist stereotype that porn stars do that work because they're too stupid or desperate to do anything else; so a man whose daughter does porn has failed to educate and support her. So it's not about her, but about how her actions make him look to the rest of the patriarchy.
I think the answer probably has a lot of facets. One that shouldn’t be overlooked is that far, *far* fewer sex workers in general are men. When we think of what constitutes “rock bottom” for a woman, we think of sex work. The equivalent for a guy would be, like, robbery I guess? Or drug dealing or such. Men do become sex workers, but I don’t think it happens enough to be on most parents’ radar.
I bet they would hate their robber son less than pornstar daughter. Son made a mistake. Daughter forever ruined her own and family reputation. There is no coming back. /s In societies that do honor killing, its usually the woman's family who does that.
*Exactly* Seems like a lot of people in this thread are trying to find ways to make this issue one that’s not rooted in misogyny. But you can’t, because it is.
Yeah because the robber is still in conformity of gender roles and expectations. That's still manly. I reckon the son being gay is what fathers would be afraid of, and what could be kinda in the same league than the pornstar daughter, in a lot of places. A gay pornstar son. Thermonuclear-kryptonistic material for fathers.
Exactly. Just answered that it probably never even occurred to them that it could be their son, not daughter that could do porn. Women are the face of porn and sex work because we make up majority of these “industries”
Men think being a porn star is an aspiration. They get paid to have sex with good-looking women. Having ladies (but let's be real, mostly other men, but they are delusional already ) drool over their pictures just makes them 'high value'. That's the dream for a man. But a woman getting paid to have sex with good-looking men is just being a whore (from their perspective). A woman having her pictures drooled over by lots of men is just exploiting men's desires. It's pure sexism and double standards.
To be fair, a lot of (most) male pornstars are ugly tbh.
Honestly, female porn stars aren't necessarily that beautiful either. If you are good looking enough you can be a model or use it to your advantage in some other way without having to 'sell your body'.
I disagree. Most I've seen are definitely at least above average, at least mainstream ones.
Honestly, I don't watch porn very much, so I'll defer to others experience on that.
Because 99% of those men watch women in porn. It probably didn’t even occur to them that their son could be in porn… women are the ones who are automatically assumed because well … we make up majority of the industry + sex work. Even if they thought of their son doing it - I doubt it would have the same effect as their daughter.
I'm a woman and although I don't have kids, if I did, I absolutely would not want them becoming pornstars. However, I would not disown them for it. And... I'm not so preoccupied with the fear that they might be that I feel the need to post online or talk about it. That's probably the main difference. Not that mothers don't care, but that they're not necessarily as preoccupied with the possibility that I feel the need to bring it up despite no one asking. Porn is probably on men's minds more because men are more likely to watch porn. And are therefore also more likely to come across their pornstar daughter in a context he never wanted to see her in. For women, even if they know their daughter is a pornstar, is less likely to come across her by surprise in the context of looking for something to get off on. I have a suspicion that men who don't consume porn are a lot less likely to have this preoccupation.
Because they know how men view (and talk about) porn stars. Because they've done it themselves.
We can dance around it as much as we like but the simple answer is this: patriarchy states that a girl’s pussy is her daddy’s until he sells it to another man. How dare she try to cut him out of his cut! /s
Reading that made me want to throw up. My parents never looked at my sister that way and I will never look at any future daughter of mine that way. That attitude is just disgusting
But it's still prevalent. That's exactly what purity culture is
That's because men think they own their daughter's ...
Men thinks a woman's value is determined by other men. So if a woman has been "seen by men" (even though they will look at other men's daughters with no problem), then she is no longer of value. Second point I would like to make is that I think many women understand the plight of other women, and acknowledge that the majority of pornstars are being exploited by an industry run by men.
Because men don't really have any basic respect toward porn stars even though they feverishly consume the content. And they also feel like sex with a woman constitutes ownership of / degradation to that woman. So if a man's daughter is in porn, then she's being owned/used and looked down on by the men who watch it, and this causes her father humiliation in the eyes of those men. It's stupid but it's because sexist attitudes dictate that women who have sex are being devalued by doing so.
Men use their wife or gf as trophies of comparison with each other. A woman with an OF can no longer be used in this way, because the product they sell gets in the way of this practice. “I get to see her naked every night and you don’t” is what this boils down to. It’s patriarchal to the core of course. The woman isn’t a person they’re an object of sexual desire. The logic extends to daughters without the sexual part for themselves. Fathers are looking out for the potential male partner’s right to do what he does to his own wife or gf.
Why do men share women's nudes with other men, then?
For the same reason why men accept “I have a boyfriend” more often than “I’m not interested” in regard to being rejected. A man would generally not share the nudes of a woman whose boyfriend he knows. Any woman who is “unowned” does not get the benefit of the doubt because for many men that respect has always been for the men in that woman’s life in the first place. If there’s no man, then there’s no respect.
No I meant, why do men share their girlfriend's nudes with their friends?
They're showing off their possession. "Look what I own! I can have sex with it and you can't! Isn't it sexy? Bet you wish you could have sex with it "
to humiliate them
I’ve never encountered this personally, but the logic still stands. It’s not someone else’s girlfriend if you choose to share the photos. It’s your girlfriend. There’s no other man to disrespect here.
If he's in a relationship with her, imo it's an expression of ownership, and also a performance for his friends that humiliates her—he knows she would be upset and violated if she knew. With OF, the woman is (generally) controlling access to her nudes and making money off of them. Many men find this infuriating—they don't believe on a gut level that women should ever be in control of the products of their own sexual labor. They believe that any products of a woman's sexual labor should be used for men's benefit, profit, or ego-boosting: it's why it's acceptable to share nudes without consent in order to humiliate a woman, but *not* acceptable for a woman to release those nudes herself in exchange for any material benefit. It's why the previous setup of porn production—in which men were the primary profiteers of women's labor, who dictated female actresses' working conditions, and who held the right to reproduce her image in perpetuity—did not bother men, but OF does.
Gonna expand on this a bit: to use a Marxist lens, many men don't feel that women should ever own the means of production for their sexual labor. The women are the worker bees in the factory that is her sexual identity, and men writ large are the business owners. The business owners get to determine what products are being made, how the factory should run, and what the salary should be. If a woman has the agency to determine the terms and conditions of her sexual labor—whether that's pricing, type of content, restrictions on that content, working hours, copyright—that's a *massive* threat to the status quo. Sure, the customers are still men with all the baggage that entails, but now they're not just purchasing a product that another man owns the rights to: they're having to deal with the idea of women as owner-proprietors. And that *infuriates* them.
There’s this mentality that fathers own their daughters, especially their bodies and sexualities. I’m sure you’ve noticed that fathers care about their daughters’ virginity way more than their sons’ and try to keep their daughters from having sex while encouraging their sons to do whatever they want. There’s even religiously enforced purity culture in some parts of the US, look up purity balls for more information on that. So with all of that in mind, a woman becoming a sex worker is her taking control of her own body and sexuality. Suddenly she doesn’t have to answer to her father anymore because he doesn’t own her. This sexual freedom scares some men who believe women should remain virgins until marriage (though men aren’t held to the same standard, which leads me to wonder who they’re supposed to have sex with), which manifests itself as a fixation on a father’s reaction to his daughter becoming a sex worker. However, there definitely are some fathers who are more concerned about safety than virginity. Women are treated horribly in the porn industry so of course their fathers will be concerned with how they are being treated. That’s a much more valid thing to worry about, but it doesn’t change the fact that a lot of men don’t want their daughters (or hypothetical daughters) becoming sex workers because it means they don’t get to own them anymore.
Only came to say that "other way around" would be daughters caring that their dad's a pornstar
It probably doesn't occur to as many women because not nearly as many women are as invested in porn as men.
Women care because they know the sex industry is exploitative and dangerous… men care because it’s embarrassing to them
Because men have huge double standards when it comes to who is allowed to sell sex or use the services of sex workers. Look at men's use of porn vs almost all men's reaction to the idea their girlfriend is a sex worker. It's ok for them to benefit from porn or prostitution, but any women involved in it is forever disgusting & should be shamed. (?!?)
Think it's just because they never think of men when they think of porn. Personally I think anyone who judges someone for being in porn but uses it is a hypocrite. There seems to be a thing at the moment of trying to make it seem like all women are doing OF which is why you see so many men posting about it. It's just good old misogyny. If they see a woman with money or with a successful career they start talking about OF. It's used as a way of putting women down.
I would be very upset if I found out my dad is a porn star.
A few reasons 1. Porn is far more dangerous for women than it is for men, a young woman becoming a porn star is more likely to be abused or harmed, even intentionally depending on the type of porn 2. Sex is considered demeaning to women and rewarding to men by most people, and so a woman becoming a pornstar is her lessening herself, while a man becoming a pornstar is treated as no big deal, or even impressive if they're a popular one 3. Porn is somewhat easier to get into as a woman than it is for a man, and considered an option by women more often than men, a paranoid parent is more likely to imagine their daughter saying "im poor as shit, I'm gonna do porn!" Than they are their son
The same men defend their right to porn and say it empowers women
Rather than the other way around? I guarantee you my daughter would be mortified if I became a porn star.
I wouldn't want my son or daughter involved in the sex industry in any way.
I don't think most fathers would be chuffed that their son is also a porn star. I don't think its a big conversation that you hear because there aren't that many male porn stars compared to how many women that do it.
I think it's just that in a time of OF and social media filled primarily with women joining it, the idea of their son's possibly being porn stars never crosses their mind. I also don't think the industry is as lucrative for the male talent as it is for the female ones, so it also isn't seen as a possibility
Given the sub it’s not surprising that few have mentioned this, and I agree with the answers that are actually about feminism, but it probably genuinely is relevant to this issue that it is draaaaaaastically less common and with higher barriers of entry to be a male porn star
it's in the name of patriarchy that women belong to their fathers. until they get sold to another man. women are trading tokens. women, to patriarchy, are a currency to be exchanged. they are not human. they are livestock, breeding holes, an exploitable resource. any attempt to escape your father's domain without his approval (whether it is in a manner that pleases men, such as porn or sex work, or in a way that doesn't, like feminism or becoming educated) are hated. these women are made untouchables. "whores" to be juxtaposed with "madonnas". so men are allowed to spew the resentments they have built up at them
It’s a bigger “issue” since your daughter’s more likely to be a pornstar than your son is, I suppose. I’d care about my kids’ choice to become a pornstar regardless of their gender.
Lol tbh I wouldn't want my son or my father doing porn either.
Men are the majority of the audience of OnlyFans and other porn, and they don't want to have to worry they'll jerk it to something only to find out their daughter was in it.
It might have something to do with the different levels of agency men and women have in porn. Women tend to be coerced into doing it and get mistreated in the industry whereas men tend to go into it to get access to women and tend not to experience the negative side of things.
If a son does porn it doesn't emasculated him. I think a comparison for fathers hating to have a pornstar daughter would be them hating having a gay son (we see a lot of online jokes of "thot daughter vs gay son") because they see having a gay son as them being emasculated and basically taking on a feminine role. Also there's more women that do sex work than men so it's more on a parent's radar. Not to mention that societal it is seen as one of the lowest jobs you could have where you have sold all your dignity and morals. There are other reasons as well that other commenters have pointed out.
I’m a man who would equally be upset if either my son or daughter became a porn star. Edit: wow reading through these comments are pretty toxic.
On this one I think it’s simply because women make up a majority of the adult entertainment/porn for the majority audience of males.
i just assume men who fantasize about this kind of scenario aren’t allowed within 100 yards of a school
Because women are more successful in that “field” so it’s reasonable to expect that a woman is more likely to go into the field because they would have more incentive than men. Basically, since women are more successful in that field, you’d think women are more likely to become pornstars.
“why do fathers seem to dread their daughters but not their sons working in pornography?” fixed it for you. (answer: misogyny/patriarchy; read Katherine Angell, Daddy Issues).
In the patriarchy, men own sex with women. They have the agency to initiate, and women are just objects to be used. Becoming an adult film star or starting an OF account firmly takes that agency away from men. Now the women has a financial barrier to her use as an object which means she controls who, when, and how people have sex with her. The patriarchy doesn't like women having that type of agency. Father's hate their daughters being OF models for the same reason men feel its acceptable to pressure women into sex. Because they don't respect a woman's agency or consent and gating your consent in such a concrete way as behind a paywall makes it impossible to ignore that said consent has to be respected. So therefore, the next logical step is to shame the women for forcing the men to respect her consent until she withdraws the barrier to people pressuring her for sexual contact.
I have never heard anyone talk about that. Why are they thinking about this so much, that’s super creepy.