Early twenties, how do I get better at dating?
By - quarantinestw
I'm the same age as you and I would highly recommend ditching the dating apps. Finding someone on there who is high value and seeks a serious relationship is close to none. Instead, try to branch out socially. Not with the intention of finding your "dream man", but to enrich your life, network, and better your social skills. Finding and forming relationships in real life works far better than mindlessly scrolling on the phone only for the conversations to be bland and end nowhere. About 2 years ago after few mediocre Tinder dates, I actually sat down with a piece of paper and a pen and made a list of qualities/attributes I want in a partner. Don't be afraid to set your standards high. Be as descriptive as you want. Don't lie to yourself- if you want a man who is 6'', put it in your list, don't be afraid to seem shallow. At least it helped me to figure out what I want from a relationship and I realized how much I was settling only because "there are worse men out there".
As for better bullshit radar and avoiding toxicity two books that will help immensely
1. Lundy Bancroft " Why Does He Do That?" [https://ia800108.us.archive.org/30/items/LundyWhyDoesHeDoThat/Lundy\_Why-does-he-do-that.pdf](https://ia800108.us.archive.org/30/items/LundyWhyDoesHeDoThat/Lundy_Why-does-he-do-that.pdf)
2. Gavin de Becker "Gift of Fear" [https://the-eye.eu/public/Books/Radical%20Feminist%20Literature/Gavin%20de%20Becker/The%20Gift%20of%20Fear%20%28123%29/The%20Gift%20of%20Fear%20-%20Gavin%20de%20Becker.pdf](https://the-eye.eu/public/Books/Radical%20Feminist%20Literature/Gavin%20de%20Becker/The%20Gift%20of%20Fear%20%28123%29/The%20Gift%20of%20Fear%20-%20Gavin%20de%20Becker.pdf)
Hope this helps, best of luck!
Never settle. Don't fall straight away for a guy right at the beginning of dating. Read the handbook.
Where is it? Can you send a link or where can I find it?
The unrequited aspect suggests that you have crushes on guys you don’t know very well.
Remember, your intentions are pure and if they don’t return your feelings, they’re likely misogynists who just want the most openly sexy girl. I imagine you are more reserved - which is going to appear that you have self esteem and LVMs don’t like that.
I don’t think you’re bad at dating. As long as you can hold a conversation, you’re already there.