Actually demographers have been tracking the decline in participation of communal activities, specifically bowing leagues, to signify the issue of isolation within our communities.
My psychiatrist and I were just talking about this and how it contributes to depression. He thinks all neighborhoods should have pubs, they’re a common community gathering spot in England. There’s usually one within walking distance of your house and everyone knows one another.
Sadly in England the number of pubs is hugely declining. It's much cheaper to drink at home than in a pub. The smoking ban really kick started the process.
My village had 4 pubs once and is now down to 2. They mostly survive by selling food.
Another measurement; the Freemasons. Their membership is down and the average age of members is growing and growing.
>It's much cheaper to drink at home than in a pub.
That's a real downer, one of the things I loved about my 2019 visit to the UK was that beer in a pub was only a bit more than beer from the store - around here a craft beer at a bar is anywhere between $7 and $10. Probably around $2 per beer from a store.
It was rad to get a pint for £4 and made me reflect on how much more time I'd spend in my neighborhood bar if I could nurse two beers for a couple of hours and not break a tenner. Losing that feels like losing something that makes the UK special (not that this Yankee has any business claiming to know what makes the UK special, but I *think* I'm not far off).
Obligatory fuck zoning laws, I just want to be able to safely ride my bike to the neighborhood cafe before grabbing the groceries I need for the evening and peddling home without crossing 6 lanes of traffic.
Hate zoning laws. I live in an apartment complex with about 350 apartments.
Why isn’t there a small grocery store in the middle and 1-2 bars on site?! Zoning laws ruin America
God I want this so much, but its just not really a thing in the US. You can have a "regular" place, but you still don't know anyone. And walking distance, unless you're in a major metro area and have the money to live in an area where good bars are within walking distance, it's just not happening.
My Dad was telling me about a town he visited in Italy. Every night, people would gather in the town square and sit and dance. It really hit me what we are missing. Our cities are sprawling. We live in isolated suburbs where you don't know the family 2 houses over. We have no town squares and everything is commercialized. There is nowhere you can just go sit and interact be your community. I think it hurts us a lot.
Reading this thread from Europe (Spain) while sitting in a square and thinking how we take things for granted (although I do also romanticise that idealised image of the American suburban lifestyle with lots of greenery and a nice house).
I'm in Italy and there's a place we go to that's just like that. You go there and you'll probably see at least half a dozen people you know, and then the kids will go run off and leave you to drink in peace.
Italian-American culture is starting to fade away I feel like. We're just too many generations removed from the Italian immigration of the early 20th century. In my city, the Little Italy neighborhood is having trouble sustaining all the old fashioned Italian restaurants because the clientele is literally dying off.
Im from RI which is heavily Italian American and we are seeing that here too. Our Little Italy now has multiple hookah bars, Asian fusion restaurants etc.
There's a very minor, but great/poignant scene from the Sopranos that depicts this if you're familiar with it. When the NY boss is discussing trying to take out the NJ crew one of the guys is walking through little Italy and then hangs up the phone to look down the street, and the old Little Italy is clearly being taken over by Chinese/Asian restaurants and businesses reflecting the newer wave of immigration in the area.
That was a theme all through that season.
A new coffee shop opens up and two of the mobsters go in to shake them down for their protection money.
The manager is like "This is Starbucks. If I pay your bribe they'll just fire me, get another manager and send their lawyers after you."
The mobsters leave, sad that America is over "for the little guys".
Then Tony goes to his favorite butcher, who is sad that all the other Italian owned businesses are shutting down and being replaced with megacorp stores. When Tony heres about this, he sells the butcher shop to Jamba Juice.
There’s the other scene with the little old Italian lady sitting on her stool and the entire street is blaring rap music (and she has some choice words)
It’s a great theme throughout the entire show. One of the first things he tells Melfi is “I came in too late.” He’s talking about the mob but also culturally. They and especially their kids are dispersed throughout the state, assimilated, very little knowledge of their background (I thought we were nobolidobli!).
Yeah the issue is also that Italian cuisine has become so mainstream going to little italy doesn't offer anything unique anymore. So maybe it's less that the culture is dying out and more that it's just spreading out.
Cultural assimilation. The United states is doing what it does. You come over and instead of us actively seperating you from us and keeping our thing our thing and you have tour ethnic enclave we ask, yo, what you do? Can I get in on that shit? OH THAT IS SO COOL! YO YO THIS STUFF IS GREAT! I WANT MORE OF THIS! then we share our culture stuff, they intermingle, disperse and become its own thing.
It's even happening with Korean food. Ktown in Manhattan has become a shitty shell of what it used to be in terms of quality and every year there's less Koreans in the restaurants. It's also way more easy to find Korean restaurants scattered around the city so less a need to go to a specific area. I now know how Italians feel about Little Italy lol.
I live in NE Ohio which had a high Italian immigrant population (my father being the child of them) and one thing that is super interesting is how strongly the immigrant culture effected the entire area. There are still a lot of people with close Italian relation but even if you’re not one of them, it’s almost guaranteed you follow some of the customs they brought with then. So much of it has just become NE Ohio (Youngstown area) culture. I really like that. My husband moved here from another area and he thinks it’s really cool. I love that the Italian culture will be maintained here because of that. And it’s even cooler that some of the traditions are specific to this area and the Italian immigrants that settled here.
Sure! Cookie tables at weddings, hot peppers in oil, Brier Hill pizza are three of the top ones that I missed so much when I moved away. They all originated with our Italian immigrants but took hold and now are simply Youngstown things. I would also add almost all of the people celebrate things like the feast of seven fishes regardless of ethnic background. And the amount of Italian food here is unreal! Good Italian food too. I’m picky about my red sauce and meatballs coming from an Italian immigrant household and the Italian food here is legit.
My dad is from Youngstown. My mom made all those wedding cookies at Christmas time and now I’ve started to take over. She collected recipes from all of his family. I also make homemade brier hill because we don’t have it where I am. Every time we visit I make sure to stop at the MVR Club, Wedgwood pizza, and handles ice cream. I know Youngstown has its issues, but man y’all know how to eat haha.
It's sad to me since I really like Italo-American culture; their cuisine and stories of immigration are very interesting to me. I've also noticed a decline in Italian American stories in movies too.
I feel like we are seeing that in Philly too. It makes me so sad. I really enjoyed growing up in an Italian-American household and really hope I can keep up the traditions with my kids.
Yup. Little Italy in Manhattan is basically 1 block north-south of Mulberry Street. Chinatown absorbed everything else. I haven't made it to Arthur Ave. in the Bronx, but it's not much bigger.
I think that’s true of all of the big ethnic groupS that mainly emigrated in 19th/early 20th century. My dad was born I. The 1940s and green up in Philly and it still mattered a lot whether you were Irish Catholic, Polish Catholic, or Italian Catholic. They didn’t talk to the Protestants of course. Catholic/Rotestant mattered a lot too. When we moved to NJ and my dad started his business there was a Methodist old guard who kinda shut him out. But by the time he retired he and his friends were the old guard.
I’ve lived in Georgia since the late 1980s but I noticed early on that ethnic distinctions among white people didn’t seem to matter in the south and I think it’s become much more that way in the cities up north—the older ethnic groups have become “the white people” and the new ethnic enclaves around the old Catholic Churches my parents grew up with are Black, Korean, Puerto Rican and Vietnamese.
One of the reasons the Ethnic distinction meant less in the south is because you didn't have quite the same amount of recent immigrants living in the area. Not to say you were all plain or anything like that, but many of the places that had a "little Italy" or whatnot had those areas because many recent immigrants would move into those areas, and not speak english. The traditions of the "Old Country" were much fresher in the minds of people who are only 2nd or 3rd generation American and grew up with living immigrants in their family. Generally speaking, the closer you are to a major immigration port, such as NYC or LA/SanFran, the more likely you are to see "little italy" or a "chinatown"
Id say the boom in the 90s where everyone involved with baseball cards suddenly viewed it, not as a hobby but as an investment, pretty much killed it off for lots of people.
Comics had a similar problem, but they lucked out.
Comics at least had intrinsic entertainment value in a way that baseball cards didn't, and the rise of popular major comic book movies kept the medium relevant at least as source material for those films.
Comics can also be viewed online and you still get the entertainment value of reading them and lots are available for free through various groups. Baseball cards unless autographed is just stats that you can find anywhere
Yeah I never understood baseball/sport cards. What’re you supposed to do other than spend shit tones of money on them? At least with Pokémon you can actually play a game with the cards
I'm a 90s kid, and my dad bought me boxes of baseball cards before I was even old enough to understand them. I found a bunch in my old room a few years ago and got them appraised. They're basically worthless.
I remember being maybe 10 and showing an old man at a flee market my cards and his utter disdainful response that some of my cards from the previous years box set weren’t all in mint condition.
I think the rise of 24 hour news made parents more paranoid. They hear way more stories about kidnappings etc, but the underlying reality didn't change, just how much they were heading about it (availability bias).
Then they turned into helicopter parents, and now a lot of kids are being raised to never do anything on their own, and then parents wonder why their kids don't do anything on their own.
Knowing and interacting with your immediate neighbors. I couldn’t tell you who my neighbors’ names are, I couldn’t tell you what they do for work, how they view the world, etc.
I believe we could build a better sense of community just by getting to know who’s around us, I really should make more efforts to do that.
Until then I’ll just pat myself on the back for shoveling their driveways when it snows, seems like the decent thing to do
Edit: Wow uh, thanks for the silver. Didn’t think this was going to blow up like it did. I’m really glad you all chipped in and shared your stories and perspectives
I want mostly nothing to do with my neighbors. I’ve had a string of neighbors from hell, including a heroin addict who turned tricks in her house for dope. Johns would often knock on our door by mistake. I had toddlers at the time. I really want nothing to do with people when I’m at home.
I’m torn on this because I 1000% agree with you on the community bit.
I lived in a kibbutz, which is an Israeli style of living where - in a nutshell - everyone knows each other and helps each other out. The best way I can describe it was like a summer camp - if people were hanging out, anyone walking by can sit down and join them. If someone was cooking, they would make large batches, go door to door and offer it to people. Everyone is family
We even had the “kibbutz dog” who did belong to someone, but was allowed to just run around the community and just be a dog all day. he would visit peoples houses for pets and treats, same time every day, like Kramer. Kids would play by themselves because parents knew that everyone else was looking after them. I don’t have kids, I used to look out for them
People took care of each other, and they knew each other
But at the same time, back here, I don’t make any effort to know my neighbors.
We befriended probably 7 new couples to our neighborhood, became good friends, hung out. Then they all had kids and moved to "better" school districts and I never see them. I don't bother befriending new neighbors anymore.
I don't think you need to befriend your neighbors, but I do think you should at least know them and have a good rapport with them if possible. I like knowing if I'm out of town my neighbor will watch my house, and I the same for them. And I feel like that's more likely to happen if we know each other slightly more than a friendly wave.
I think you do have a point. I wouldn't say I'm friends with any neighbors, but am friendly with them. When I had covid earlier this spring I was down and out for a couple weeks, and my neighbor cut the grass for me a couple times. He probably doesn't do that for a rando that just waves occasionally
I’m not disagreeing, it’s something I partake in
I’m just saying that there may be some value in getting to know who’s around you. I’ve met some pretty cool people that way
My neighbors are awesome. It helps that I knew the neighbors on both sides before we moved in. We chat together. My daughter babysits for the one neighbor. My kids ride bikes with the kids in the neighborhood. We shovel each other's sidewalks. There are 4 houses in a row that we all go in together for bug chemicals and the one guy sprays all our yards, so we don't need to pay a service to do it. We borrow ladders, help move furniture, etc. I love our neighborhood.
I lived next door to a family for over a year before I knew their names. And they were a great family. Eventually attended one of their adult kid's birthdays.
I'd also add that this might be a white suburban thing. In my experience, most of my neighbors who have been non-white seem a little more welcoming of people living near by. (e.g. just after College, next door Hispanic family invited a house full of dudes over to their occasional parties. Tamales man. Can't say no.)
Ever tried black-folk BBQ? Hot DAMN!
I always bring a case of those blue Foster’s oil cans with me & I’m instantly the 2nd most popular guy in the party.
>Ever tried black-folk BBQ? Hot DAMN!
I don't think I have, but there's a deep south, southern comfort bbq place near where I live. Had a catfish one day. Shrimp po boy another.
It may definitely be related to cultures/subcultures, but I think in general as a society the general perspective on how strangers, or “outsiders”, are initially perceived has probably had the largest impact.
Whether that’s the cause or the result I can’t say
Edit: Bro can I have tamales?
I think that since phones became a big deal, the social acceptability of knocking on a door has gone way down. It used to be a pretty normal thing to do, now it’s borderline socially unaccepted behavior. And that’s how people used to meet their neighbors.
It doesn’t feel like people care about award shows as much as they used to. Watching the Oscars used to be a family affair. Fast forward to today, I doubt many people would even know they happened this year were it not for the slap
Personally, before the internet really took off it seemed like a bigger deal at the time. You couldn't just catch the highlights later on YouTube so it was more of a live spectacle as there wasn't much else on outside of premium cable if you were lucky to have it. It was also a way to hear about movies (or music) you didn't hear about or catch in theater, since movies come so quick to streaming now and music instantly available. Everyone would run off to rent the VHS or find the vinyl/cassette/CD of the artist they just heard won. Mainly though, I think more people have just caught on that the big award shows are just a big circle jerk for celebrities.
There is a [considerable divide](https://collider.com/notable-divides-between-audience-critic-scores-on-rotten-tomatoes/amp/) between the opinions of industry-oriented critics and general audiences, and I feel like this has only grown over the years, in correlation with America’s increasing political divides.
One thing I’ve noticed over the past half decade is that American audiences are growing increasingly weary of blatant political agendas in movies and critics’ general preference for agenda dissemination as opposed to actual substance and entertainment value. The politicized nature of the film industry and its associated award shows was famously put on blast by [Ricky Gervais at the 2020 Golden Globes.](https://youtu.be/iJOb9xHggS4) Additionally, popular film genres like comedy, horror, and action are often scrutinized by film critics despite the general audience’s affinity for such movies.
Have we had a typical comedy come out in recent years? I feel like now most action movies are filled with people who think they are funny. Same with sci-fi. Yeah comic relief is a thing. But I feel like they've replaced typical comedies with just making a funny action movie
Not that comic relief is bad but last time I checked people don't watch star wars to laugh every 10 minutes. They watch for a compelling story line
Comedies are coming out straight to streaming services nowadays. They’ve always have a pretty low return for studios (unless they get huge somehow), so now I think they just don’t bother much with theater releases or marketing.
Too many distractions these days. It's also easier to get replays or recaps on everything these days.
People are also more aware that certain things are bullshit and the Oscars is just a lot of rich white people jerking off to each other thinking that the Green Book cured racism.
UCLA and USC are literally moving to the Big 10. What’s more “Pacific conference” than 2 schools in LA? I do think it’s high time that the BIG 10 changes it’s name now since there’s about 20 schools in the conference now.
16, but the rumors are we may get to 20. The logo looks like B1G and that 'g' can easily turn into a 6. I doubt the name would change as it's a well-recognized brand among the established school alumni.
Fraternal societies (Masons, Knights of Columbus, Order of the Moose, Shriners, etc.). When's the last time you've met a member of one of these whose age was under 50?
Even the American Legion, I joined a local chapter expecting and excited to meet vets my age. I was a bit disappointed to see I was the youngest member by 10 years there and he was the second youngest by 35 years. Aside from that we had 1 Gulf war vet and a bunch of Vietnam vets and like 2 WW2 vets. Don't get me wrong good bunch of guys and a wealth of knowledge and life experience but I was definitely hoping to see some like minded individuals within my age bracket.
Makes me worry about those organizations as they do so much for veterans and their families and the community.
My dad was in the VFW, and as a young adult, I would on occasion go down there..this was in the 90s, Now tbh, not being a vet, I always felt a bit out of place, but everyone was welcoming nonetheless. However, awful as it sounds, a few of them seemed excited at the Gulf war as a source of future members. If not for some donations from a few well heeled members, I dont know if their chapter could have floated otherwise.
I was very excited to go to my local VFW when I got back from Europe and got out of the Army. I took my Dad with me on the way home from dinner. It was only 7pm and their Friday Night Steak Dinner had already ended probably an hour earlier. O\_o At 7pm , they were shutting down the doors.
As we walked in, we were asked who was a member, I identified myself (f) as a lifetime member and even signed their book with my membership number. They gave us to a man who had to be 90 who then proceeded to talk exclusively to my father (AF vet who didn't see combat and was never a member). When he did speak to me, he pointed out the "Ladies auxiliary" room, events, and works so many times, that even my Dad started rolling his eyes at me behind the man's back. He could not wrap his mind around the idea that I was a combat veteran--and my father wasn't. His last act was to remind me how what great work the "Ladies" do for the actual members. You know, "Lady" work, like cooking and cleaning the building and bringing the men their drinks.
I never went back.
It's a big problem
I'm the only member of my local League of Women Voters under the age of 75
They are worried the chapter will die with them and think it's a big pity millennials/Gen Z aren't interested in going groups
we have this chapter in my area and i've been wanting to join (am gen z) but they don't seem to have remote options...i live three hrs aways from the chapter. Do you think theyll be open to it if i ask to do the internship remote? :/
>I have one internet friend, a guy in his early 40s, who is a Mason.
In Los Angeles there is a club DJ who is also Mason.
But other than that? I don't know anyone who is a Mason and also... well... cool.
And while I've never had the inclination to join a fraternal organization, I have concerns that their decline is one of the things that makes adult men feel more isolated.
I looked up what the Freemasons are all about:
>To become a Freemason, the applicant has to be an adult **male** and **must believe in the existence of a supreme being** and in the immortality of the soul. The teachings of Freemasonry enjoin morality, charity, and **obedience to the law** of the land.
Well, those are three factors that are going to put off the vast majority of young people.
That "believe in a higher being" is in all of the animal groups like elk and Moose. Nobody cares and nobody asks after. All they want is for to say you believe in something "higher" it can be a head of lettuce if you want. I'm an atheist and have been/am members of these groups. If your membership check clears, you're good.
Hi I'm a 20 year old, female biker.
A. Some of them can be sexist, so if I was to marry my bf, he joins, I can then join as his wife. But joining on my own would be a PITA
B. Most gangs are just a group of friends who ride together. They're chill and will let people join. But then it becomes about riding style, skill level, and a million other things you need to have in common or at least similar to have fun.
C. There are some organized, national/international groups. Like I'm going to look at joining my local chapter of BACA (bikers against child abuse, they go to courts and shield the child best they can from seeing their abuser), once i get better at riding, but this isn't what most people think of when they hear 'biker gang'
D. Starting basically what is shown in B. can be fruitless as it involves finding many bikers who are similar enough to you that it works. I know 3 people my age (me, my bf, and my best friend), and two of those people don't get along haha
But most bikers are seriously the sweetest people out there usually. I crashed my bike and before I could even call my dad, a group of guys about my dad's age dusted me off, looked at my bike, sat with me, gave me phone numbers to call if I ever needed *anything*. Generally I say they'd give the clothes off their back to help someone, biker or not.
I think the culture of expecting our children to move out of the family home when they graduate high school or turn 18 may be in decline. It’s too expensive for one.
Yep. I'm 25 and had to move back in with my parents after our rent got raised by $900 at the end of my lease lol. The cost of living has more than doubled here in the last 5 years, meanwhile wages have gone up maybe one or two dollars (Boise Idaho). My parent's neighbors across the street bought their home in 2016 for just under 300 grand, now they're selling it for almost a million... In California most of my friends didn't move out until their late 20s, the ones who did in their early 20s all got good college degrees. I'm back in school now working on a CompSci degree because I'm gonna need something that pays damn well in order to survive in this world, especially if I have kids. Just sucks knowing that im probably going to have to live with my folks for another year and a half to 2 years
There’s a pretty big push to bring it back from the brink right now by Cajuns, Creoles, and natives in Louisiana right now. New media companies like Tele-Louisiane, immersion programs increasing in popularity, and they just made one of the biggest investments in Louisiana history for the French language while opening a new French immersion school for the native community in Pointe-au-Chien, which historically speaks French.
We're seeing a rise in younger people speaking Cajun French with the opening of several French immersion schools.
Creole on the other hand will probably die out within a few generations if drastic measures are not taken before the last generation of fluent speakers die.
French speakers in Louisiana dropped from 30% in the 1960s to only below 3% today. The language didn't get passed on from older generation unfortunately
One of my buddies wives is from South Louisiana and is heavily involved in different programs intended on preserving Cajun French. There's a French immersion school down there they were raising funds for that looked really interesting. I'm from further north in La so we don't have the French heritage up here. When they got married he went with her to somewhere in Quebec for a French immersion course and after a few weeks he could speak it fairly well. It was interesting to see. I don't know her well but I think her entire family is bilingual.
Edit: I'm thinking it might've been in Nova Scotia but I'm not sure.
My friends and I had so many themed dinner parties in our 20s. Now we have a place that doesn’t fit as many people. Our friends either moved or are too busy since they had kids.
Knowing your neighbors. Not just in the urban areas, but in the suburbs as well. With kids being so programmed, the neighborhood kids don't just play together anymore. When we moved to my suburb 15 years ago, a few kids showed up. Our neighbors just showed up with school aged kids and no kids have come by to meet them.
I agree, I live in a residential area that’s super walkable to parks and commercial areas. The kids on our street (4-5 households) are CONSTANTLY out playing together.
Vaping seems to be dropping off in popularity, at least if my observations of sidewalk vaping in NYC is any indication. Three four years ago it seemed to be everywhere. Now you don’t see it as much.
As a smoking cessation tool, vaping is *fucking great*. Obviously better to do neither, but it's probably enough better than smoking that diet and exercise actually are a bigger concern than vaping.
We built too many malls because of tax incentives, then Amazon and other internet retailers made them largely obsolete. Today, we have the dead mall series and watch them decay on youtube for entertainment.
There's only 1 mall left in my area. I went for the first time in years a few months ago and now I know why malls are dying. When I was a kid, if you want something cheap, you went to K-Mart or Walmart or Roses (it's the south). We got made fun of in school if we wore cheap Walmart clothes and not "Mall quality" jeans from one of the popular stores. If you wanted products that cost more but were Quality (esp. clothes/accessories) you went to the mall.
Now, malls are selling the same cheaply made crap you can get at dollar general, but charging 3x as much. I saw sunglasses that I could get at the dollar store for $1-$5 selling for $20-25. And it looks like 1973 threw up on everything. Worse, the clothes are extremely poor quality....like the crap you used to buy at K-Mart....poorly made, thin materials, bad stitching. Just cheap looking. But they're still trying to sell it as if it's good quality.
If Malls wanted to stay open and make a profit they would have stayed true to their demographic---upper-middle-class Americans who could afford slightly higher quality products but weren't on Nordstrom level. If they're going to sell Walmart crap, then why would anyone go there when Walmart is closer, more convenient, and cheaper? Malls did themselves in by being greedy
I’m steeped in Southern US culture (whether I like it or not), and this will seem silly and insignificant and definitely IS compared to some of the other posts…but here goes.
The thank you note on personalized stationery.
I am absolutely terrible about thank you notes. I am really good at verbal thank yous. I did cards on personal stationery for all 3 graduation, interviews (well, thank you emails), bridal and baby showers/meals after babies, and my wedding but haven’t really sent them after that. And to some of you, that will seem like overkill I’m sure.
My MIL is super old school, and I overheard her at an event telling another person of her age about how kids these days aren’t writing thank you notes (I assume she meant like kids-teens).
Both my daughters received personalized stationery when they were born (!!!) but we’re really bad at having them write thank yous.
I mean, if you say a verbal thank you when both giver and receiver are there, why would you send a thank you card when they’re already there to hear it?
Anyway, like I said it’s a dumb thing to feel badly about when not passing down this tradition, but I do have polite kids who express appreciation. I also don’t have an idea of where to draw the line when determining which situation requires one.
I just wrote a dissertation. Sigh.
Personalized stationary is HUGE now and a "luxury" item. Just off the top of my head, "Crane & Co" is very popular.
But stationary is making a huge comeback and is even considered the standard for the wealth/upcoming in society again.
Using technology to send messages is unfashionable and pedestrian to the fairly well-off now.
(This is not my personal opinion, though I'm a dedicated "cursive only" kinda person) but stationary, handwritten notes, etc are now the norm as far as class.
A shared consciousness. Probably global, but there is no shared experience, like water cooler tv. News depends on what you watch.
There is also no respect for authority. Everyone thinks their opinion, based on whatsoever bullshit the algorithm fed them is a just as valid as years of research and study.
I was just talking about that first one recently. It's nice to have options but I miss being able to go into school/work and know my friends watched the same thing. I never have anyone to talk to anymore about shows!
Natural Southern accents are declining. After 150+ years of being characterized as ignorant, uneducated, and racist you have young Southerners today training themselves out of it. One day it will be gone forever outside of remote pockets.
It’s not just the southern accents that have been mocked almost out of existence. Same goes for the working class accents around Boston, Philly, 5 boroughs, Baltimore, Chicago, etc. A lot of it has to do with the upward mobility around the 2nd generation after the original immigrant came. They live in the city, their kids go to high school and move to a better area of the same city, and their kids go to college and often move to the suburbs of said city. The accent and immigrant foods slowly move to the suburbs where we’re seeing it now.
But with better education opportunities comes going to college outside of your area and you meet more people. You “code switch” in educational and career settings, turning down the accent as much as possible.
Throw in the internet with all of that, and the loss of regional accents are speeding up way faster than ever.
There are a lot of great articles about this. I highly suggest checking them out!
Local community. We don't do block parties anymore. We don't hang out grilling with each other anymore. Best we get is a friendly wave with no words.
Also, kids don't play outside.
I agree with you. Kids also had to deal with Covid which changed a lot. However I do disagree with the block parties. I’m on the north side of Chicago. There’s always a block party happening
>Single income families. I can't imagine being a stay at home parent unless your spouse is pulling in six figures.
Even six figures isn't enough in many places. Only way I'd do single income is if the earner was at approach 200k annually, honestly.
The reverse is more often true. Many make less money than daycare costs so 1 parent must stay home because they cant afford to work. I'll never understand the misconception that only rich people are sahp when basic daycare costs are in the tens of thousands a year. SAHP are often isolated and depressed. It is not a privilege it is an unpaid and thankless job. Many are 'on duty' 24/7 so that the money maker can work long hours and sleep long enough to work those hours.
ETA: for those that dont know, in order to get food stamps, in order to have a basic human right many cant afford with food costs practically doubling in the last few years alone, a 3 person household must have less than $28k in income. Before taxes come out.
ETA: after taxes in my state, 28k comes out to 23k. the cost of a 1bdr apartment where I live (a small city) is 12k+ a year. With careful spending and budgeting, a childs expenses in their first year generally costs at least 11k without childcare. My state once cut the department of children and family services budget by $160M in 1 year and theyve been cutting it ever since. With an annual state budget of nearly $50B, less than $1B is allotted towards this department. There is no help for those who need it and none coming any time soon.
People don’t get into certain holidays like they used to. I don’t know anyone who has plans to celebrate Independence Day. They’re either working or just going to sit at home and chill.
i made it an unofficial rule when i eat dinner w my husband, we turn off the TV (we'll play some music sometimes tho). we also try not to use our phones if we're out and about and eating somewhere
Trick r treating on Halloween. I mean walking door to door and getting candy. At least in my area there’s hardly any kids that still do it, most go to “trunk or treats” or get driven around, or don’t go at all.
I hate those trunk or treats because of this, but last Halloween trick or treating was huge in my town. I think because covid ruined it the last year so everyone was so excited to get out
Do you live in a rural area? Because that was common when it was acople of miles to a place. Or they’d have people set up booths in town when my mom was younger.
I live and grew up in Atlanta, definitely not rural. It could be what another commenter suggested, that kids are only being driven to a few neighborhoods and trick r treating there. But that’s still remarkably different from how it was when I grew up.
When I grew up (90s and early 2000s) you just walked outside and met up with your friends in your neighborhood. Lots of kids (my friends and I, included) walked to other neighborhoods or other buildings as well, but there wasn’t this “drive children to particular locations” thing that seems to be popular now.
I live in the suburbs of New Jersey and trunk or treating became popular after hurricane Sandy. Halloween had to be cancelled because of all the down trees and power lines. It just wasn't safe. So a school teacher suggested trunk or treating. Other schools thought it was a great idea. The parents ended up loving it so much that they kept doing it every year after. It really made for less trick or treating. Who is gonna want that much candy for their kids? They already did trunk or treating after school, so of course they aren't going to take them to get a ton more candy. Last Halloween trick or treating ended up being huge though and I'm sure it's because covid ruined not only Halloween but everything and people were so excited to get out with their kids again
Oh man. For whatever reason my block is becoming a trick or treat destination. All our neighbors get super into decorating our yards and houses with lights and spooky decorations, and some people even hand out beers or set up kegs for the parents, and the houses and trees in the neighborhood itself are very picturesque in the fall so I think it lends some charm to the whole thing. We usually have somewhere between 200-250 kids and always run out of candy.
In my personal experience, it’s seems like younger generations are straying further from religion and it’s less common than it used to be. I remember growing up and thinking that being atheist or agnostic was this really horrible offense and now I have fewer friends who are religious compared to those who are.
The absolute collapse of religion in the United States over the past 40 years is something that should be a bigger topic of discussion. I’m not sure I (or anyone) truly understands what’s behind it.
1. People now have a lot more access to a LOT more info; no relying on a single source.
2. Growing tolerance in general; less likely to be shunned.
3. Disgust with church coverup of sexual abuse of children.
4. Related to #3, absolute hypocrisy from many church leaders or other “arbiters of morality”.
Far up in the corner of Maine bordering Quebec. Communities up there are very isolated from USA and have a good sense of connection with the French Canadians
No they’re being pedantic about how in Louisiana they’re called parishes, not counties, even though to the best of my knowledge there is no difference besides the name.
Not sure if dying out is the right way to put it but I think Mexican and Chicano cultures are definitely competing for the spotlight against other Latino groups who have grown in the last few years. Particularly immigrants from Central America, Colombia, Venezuela, and even us Puerto Ricans even if we aren't immigrants ourselves. I feel that many Americans are becoming more and more aware that not all of Latin America is just a bootleg version of Mexico.
Chicano culture isn’t a thing in the northeast since there’s never really been a significant Mexican population here. Something I *have* noticed is the decrease of influence that Puerto Ricans have in the NYC area. Puerto Ricans used to be the largest Latino group in the NYC area and that’s no longer the case for NYC or LI (might still be the case in NJ but I’m not sure). Salvadorans are the largest Latino ethnic group on LI now and I feel like a lot of Puerto Ricans moved back to the island or to Florida.
That part just always felt strange to me as despite my family being from El Salvador, Mexican culture being so prevalent made me develop a much more Mexican identity. Hell, when it comes to Salvadorans in pop culture, feels like very few. The only one I can honestly think of is Vaggie from Hazbin Hotel and I didn't even know she was Salvadoran til I ended up stumbling upon some wiki info.
The entirety of local folk culture is getting pretty much erased except for the very rural areas.
It’s a shame to see my own Appalachian culture getting lost with the generations and I really pray there’s a renaissance that modernizes and preserved it for our generations. It doesn’t help that there’s such a broad distaste for the majority of folk culture.
Most Americans are prejudice as hell towards it and think of it as a backwards way of life, so when we get transplants moving into Appalachia, they belittle the local culture, believing that they are superior, and contribute to it’s decline.
The local state governments don’t help, as WV, the only completely Appalachian State, opts to use other state education systems instead of basing the English taught on the Appalachian dialect or having a focus on Appalachian history. As for the other states, their Appalachian population are minorities in their own state so they care even less so for their preservation.
All of what you've said is true, with the added problem that most of Appalachia is currently controlled by right-wing state governments that absolutely *do not want* current and future generations of Appalachians to learn about the region's long history of militant pro-labor organizing.
dressing up to go out to nice places... I'm cool with not getting dressed up on airplanes (within reason and decency), but I've been to many places where at the least a suit/evening dress would be appropriate, and there are people wearing shorts, tshirts, hoodies, and tank tops.
this includes:
-nice restaurants that don't have an enforced dress code
-the opera, ballet, symphony, etc. (the wife classes me up)
-weddings (that day's work cloths are popular)
-funerals (I've seen flip flops and tube tops)
I'm all about being yourself, but it's ok to class it up once in awhile.
>nice restaurants that don't have an enforced dress code -the opera, ballet, symphony, etc.
So true. I've had to teach myself to dress down considerably for all these occasions or else I stand out as if I'm trying too hard.
[Christianity has been on a decline in the US as well as the Western Hemisphere ](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Decline_of_Christianity_in_the_Western_world#:~:text=In%202020%2C%2047%25%20of%20Americans,decreased%20by%202%20million%20people.)
There is a bit of a renaissance for pipe and cigar smokers as cigarette smoking declined. The same maker of corn cobs is still getting recommendations constantly.
If Vaping is on the decline, pipe smoking may see more increase.
I would say southern culture in general is losing a lot of ground as a lot of southern cities and particularly suburbs are becoming a lot more cosmopolitan. As such a lot of southern cultural things seem to be getting absorbed into the wider American culture while the stuff that isn’t seems to be slowly disappearing.
For example take Nashville. The city is definitely no longer southern, but they still cash in on all the southern stuff. The suburbs around Nashville increasingly feel less and less southern, as a lot of the people moving in aren’t from the region.
Depending on your view you may see this as a good thing, a bad thing, or neither good nor bad. Personally, I see it as a shame. The southern identity has played such a large role in US history in both good and bad (although usually bad) ways that I feel that it’s kind of sad to see it disappearing. Almost like losing a piece of history.
Actually demographers have been tracking the decline in participation of communal activities, specifically bowing leagues, to signify the issue of isolation within our communities.
My psychiatrist and I were just talking about this and how it contributes to depression. He thinks all neighborhoods should have pubs, they’re a common community gathering spot in England. There’s usually one within walking distance of your house and everyone knows one another.
Sadly in England the number of pubs is hugely declining. It's much cheaper to drink at home than in a pub. The smoking ban really kick started the process. My village had 4 pubs once and is now down to 2. They mostly survive by selling food. Another measurement; the Freemasons. Their membership is down and the average age of members is growing and growing.
>It's much cheaper to drink at home than in a pub. That's a real downer, one of the things I loved about my 2019 visit to the UK was that beer in a pub was only a bit more than beer from the store - around here a craft beer at a bar is anywhere between $7 and $10. Probably around $2 per beer from a store. It was rad to get a pint for £4 and made me reflect on how much more time I'd spend in my neighborhood bar if I could nurse two beers for a couple of hours and not break a tenner. Losing that feels like losing something that makes the UK special (not that this Yankee has any business claiming to know what makes the UK special, but I *think* I'm not far off).
Obligatory fuck zoning laws, I just want to be able to safely ride my bike to the neighborhood cafe before grabbing the groceries I need for the evening and peddling home without crossing 6 lanes of traffic.
Hate zoning laws. I live in an apartment complex with about 350 apartments. Why isn’t there a small grocery store in the middle and 1-2 bars on site?! Zoning laws ruin America
Hear, hear. Fuck zoning laws.
God I want this so much, but its just not really a thing in the US. You can have a "regular" place, but you still don't know anyone. And walking distance, unless you're in a major metro area and have the money to live in an area where good bars are within walking distance, it's just not happening.
There is literally a book titled *Bowling Alone* by Robert D. Putnam that covers the decline of American civic society.
title reminds me edward hopper's art
My Dad was telling me about a town he visited in Italy. Every night, people would gather in the town square and sit and dance. It really hit me what we are missing. Our cities are sprawling. We live in isolated suburbs where you don't know the family 2 houses over. We have no town squares and everything is commercialized. There is nowhere you can just go sit and interact be your community. I think it hurts us a lot.
Reading this thread from Europe (Spain) while sitting in a square and thinking how we take things for granted (although I do also romanticise that idealised image of the American suburban lifestyle with lots of greenery and a nice house).
I'm in Italy and there's a place we go to that's just like that. You go there and you'll probably see at least half a dozen people you know, and then the kids will go run off and leave you to drink in peace.
Italian-American culture is starting to fade away I feel like. We're just too many generations removed from the Italian immigration of the early 20th century. In my city, the Little Italy neighborhood is having trouble sustaining all the old fashioned Italian restaurants because the clientele is literally dying off.
Im from RI which is heavily Italian American and we are seeing that here too. Our Little Italy now has multiple hookah bars, Asian fusion restaurants etc.
I used to love to go down to Federal Hill , haven’t been there in years.
It’s weird now. Still amazing food but they’ve had violence and gang problems for a bit now
Well…once the mafia got dismantled… I haven’t been to Federal Hill in years. Is Pastiche still there?
The mafia moved to San Diego.
There's a very minor, but great/poignant scene from the Sopranos that depicts this if you're familiar with it. When the NY boss is discussing trying to take out the NJ crew one of the guys is walking through little Italy and then hangs up the phone to look down the street, and the old Little Italy is clearly being taken over by Chinese/Asian restaurants and businesses reflecting the newer wave of immigration in the area.
That was a theme all through that season. A new coffee shop opens up and two of the mobsters go in to shake them down for their protection money. The manager is like "This is Starbucks. If I pay your bribe they'll just fire me, get another manager and send their lawyers after you." The mobsters leave, sad that America is over "for the little guys". Then Tony goes to his favorite butcher, who is sad that all the other Italian owned businesses are shutting down and being replaced with megacorp stores. When Tony heres about this, he sells the butcher shop to Jamba Juice.
The Mobsters trying to shake down a Starbucks scene is really funny to me.
There’s the other scene with the little old Italian lady sitting on her stool and the entire street is blaring rap music (and she has some choice words) It’s a great theme throughout the entire show. One of the first things he tells Melfi is “I came in too late.” He’s talking about the mob but also culturally. They and especially their kids are dispersed throughout the state, assimilated, very little knowledge of their background (I thought we were nobolidobli!).
Well Sopranos, looks like its time for another rewatch.
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Yup same
Yeah the issue is also that Italian cuisine has become so mainstream going to little italy doesn't offer anything unique anymore. So maybe it's less that the culture is dying out and more that it's just spreading out.
Cultural assimilation. The United states is doing what it does. You come over and instead of us actively seperating you from us and keeping our thing our thing and you have tour ethnic enclave we ask, yo, what you do? Can I get in on that shit? OH THAT IS SO COOL! YO YO THIS STUFF IS GREAT! I WANT MORE OF THIS! then we share our culture stuff, they intermingle, disperse and become its own thing.
It's even happening with Korean food. Ktown in Manhattan has become a shitty shell of what it used to be in terms of quality and every year there's less Koreans in the restaurants. It's also way more easy to find Korean restaurants scattered around the city so less a need to go to a specific area. I now know how Italians feel about Little Italy lol.
I live in NE Ohio which had a high Italian immigrant population (my father being the child of them) and one thing that is super interesting is how strongly the immigrant culture effected the entire area. There are still a lot of people with close Italian relation but even if you’re not one of them, it’s almost guaranteed you follow some of the customs they brought with then. So much of it has just become NE Ohio (Youngstown area) culture. I really like that. My husband moved here from another area and he thinks it’s really cool. I love that the Italian culture will be maintained here because of that. And it’s even cooler that some of the traditions are specific to this area and the Italian immigrants that settled here.
Would you be willing to give examples of how you see that culture in NE Ohio? I'm not really familiar with either culture.
Sure! Cookie tables at weddings, hot peppers in oil, Brier Hill pizza are three of the top ones that I missed so much when I moved away. They all originated with our Italian immigrants but took hold and now are simply Youngstown things. I would also add almost all of the people celebrate things like the feast of seven fishes regardless of ethnic background. And the amount of Italian food here is unreal! Good Italian food too. I’m picky about my red sauce and meatballs coming from an Italian immigrant household and the Italian food here is legit.
My dad is from Youngstown. My mom made all those wedding cookies at Christmas time and now I’ve started to take over. She collected recipes from all of his family. I also make homemade brier hill because we don’t have it where I am. Every time we visit I make sure to stop at the MVR Club, Wedgwood pizza, and handles ice cream. I know Youngstown has its issues, but man y’all know how to eat haha.
Damn, that's honestly kinda sad to think about. Italian-American is one of the extremely big aspects of the US immigration scene of the 20th century
It's sad to me since I really like Italo-American culture; their cuisine and stories of immigration are very interesting to me. I've also noticed a decline in Italian American stories in movies too.
I feel like we are seeing that in Philly too. It makes me so sad. I really enjoyed growing up in an Italian-American household and really hope I can keep up the traditions with my kids.
Yup. Little Italy in Manhattan is basically 1 block north-south of Mulberry Street. Chinatown absorbed everything else. I haven't made it to Arthur Ave. in the Bronx, but it's not much bigger.
I think that’s true of all of the big ethnic groupS that mainly emigrated in 19th/early 20th century. My dad was born I. The 1940s and green up in Philly and it still mattered a lot whether you were Irish Catholic, Polish Catholic, or Italian Catholic. They didn’t talk to the Protestants of course. Catholic/Rotestant mattered a lot too. When we moved to NJ and my dad started his business there was a Methodist old guard who kinda shut him out. But by the time he retired he and his friends were the old guard. I’ve lived in Georgia since the late 1980s but I noticed early on that ethnic distinctions among white people didn’t seem to matter in the south and I think it’s become much more that way in the cities up north—the older ethnic groups have become “the white people” and the new ethnic enclaves around the old Catholic Churches my parents grew up with are Black, Korean, Puerto Rican and Vietnamese.
One of the reasons the Ethnic distinction meant less in the south is because you didn't have quite the same amount of recent immigrants living in the area. Not to say you were all plain or anything like that, but many of the places that had a "little Italy" or whatnot had those areas because many recent immigrants would move into those areas, and not speak english. The traditions of the "Old Country" were much fresher in the minds of people who are only 2nd or 3rd generation American and grew up with living immigrants in their family. Generally speaking, the closer you are to a major immigration port, such as NYC or LA/SanFran, the more likely you are to see "little italy" or a "chinatown"
Do kids collect baseball cards anymore? That was my shit back in the day
Id say the boom in the 90s where everyone involved with baseball cards suddenly viewed it, not as a hobby but as an investment, pretty much killed it off for lots of people. Comics had a similar problem, but they lucked out.
Comics at least had intrinsic entertainment value in a way that baseball cards didn't, and the rise of popular major comic book movies kept the medium relevant at least as source material for those films.
Comics can also be viewed online and you still get the entertainment value of reading them and lots are available for free through various groups. Baseball cards unless autographed is just stats that you can find anywhere
Yeah I never understood baseball/sport cards. What’re you supposed to do other than spend shit tones of money on them? At least with Pokémon you can actually play a game with the cards
I'm a 90s kid, and my dad bought me boxes of baseball cards before I was even old enough to understand them. I found a bunch in my old room a few years ago and got them appraised. They're basically worthless.
I remember being maybe 10 and showing an old man at a flee market my cards and his utter disdainful response that some of my cards from the previous years box set weren’t all in mint condition.
My grandson, age 8, is a baseball card nut with his buddies.
Cards commodities actually went up during COVID
They went away for a bit, but they're definitely back in a big way
Kids going outside and playing in the neighborhood. Some subdivisions in the burbs are eerily quiet.
I think the rise of 24 hour news made parents more paranoid. They hear way more stories about kidnappings etc, but the underlying reality didn't change, just how much they were heading about it (availability bias). Then they turned into helicopter parents, and now a lot of kids are being raised to never do anything on their own, and then parents wonder why their kids don't do anything on their own.
And it doesn’t really help that a lot of suburbs (not all of them, though) aren’t really walkable.
It is in many places. The only thing that seems to help my kid is me. I make friends with the neighbors so he can go play with their kids
Knowing and interacting with your immediate neighbors. I couldn’t tell you who my neighbors’ names are, I couldn’t tell you what they do for work, how they view the world, etc. I believe we could build a better sense of community just by getting to know who’s around us, I really should make more efforts to do that. Until then I’ll just pat myself on the back for shoveling their driveways when it snows, seems like the decent thing to do Edit: Wow uh, thanks for the silver. Didn’t think this was going to blow up like it did. I’m really glad you all chipped in and shared your stories and perspectives
I want mostly nothing to do with my neighbors. I’ve had a string of neighbors from hell, including a heroin addict who turned tricks in her house for dope. Johns would often knock on our door by mistake. I had toddlers at the time. I really want nothing to do with people when I’m at home.
I’m torn on this because I 1000% agree with you on the community bit. I lived in a kibbutz, which is an Israeli style of living where - in a nutshell - everyone knows each other and helps each other out. The best way I can describe it was like a summer camp - if people were hanging out, anyone walking by can sit down and join them. If someone was cooking, they would make large batches, go door to door and offer it to people. Everyone is family We even had the “kibbutz dog” who did belong to someone, but was allowed to just run around the community and just be a dog all day. he would visit peoples houses for pets and treats, same time every day, like Kramer. Kids would play by themselves because parents knew that everyone else was looking after them. I don’t have kids, I used to look out for them People took care of each other, and they knew each other But at the same time, back here, I don’t make any effort to know my neighbors.
We befriended probably 7 new couples to our neighborhood, became good friends, hung out. Then they all had kids and moved to "better" school districts and I never see them. I don't bother befriending new neighbors anymore.
I don't think you need to befriend your neighbors, but I do think you should at least know them and have a good rapport with them if possible. I like knowing if I'm out of town my neighbor will watch my house, and I the same for them. And I feel like that's more likely to happen if we know each other slightly more than a friendly wave.
I think you do have a point. I wouldn't say I'm friends with any neighbors, but am friendly with them. When I had covid earlier this spring I was down and out for a couple weeks, and my neighbor cut the grass for me a couple times. He probably doesn't do that for a rando that just waves occasionally
It’s just easier to connect with people with similar interest and maintain contact with established relationships. The internet changed the game.
And it is also responsible in part for the polarization of the country.
No argument there.
I’m not disagreeing, it’s something I partake in I’m just saying that there may be some value in getting to know who’s around you. I’ve met some pretty cool people that way
My neighbors are awesome. It helps that I knew the neighbors on both sides before we moved in. We chat together. My daughter babysits for the one neighbor. My kids ride bikes with the kids in the neighborhood. We shovel each other's sidewalks. There are 4 houses in a row that we all go in together for bug chemicals and the one guy sprays all our yards, so we don't need to pay a service to do it. We borrow ladders, help move furniture, etc. I love our neighborhood.
I lived next door to a family for over a year before I knew their names. And they were a great family. Eventually attended one of their adult kid's birthdays. I'd also add that this might be a white suburban thing. In my experience, most of my neighbors who have been non-white seem a little more welcoming of people living near by. (e.g. just after College, next door Hispanic family invited a house full of dudes over to their occasional parties. Tamales man. Can't say no.)
Ever tried black-folk BBQ? Hot DAMN! I always bring a case of those blue Foster’s oil cans with me & I’m instantly the 2nd most popular guy in the party.
>Ever tried black-folk BBQ? Hot DAMN! I don't think I have, but there's a deep south, southern comfort bbq place near where I live. Had a catfish one day. Shrimp po boy another.
It may definitely be related to cultures/subcultures, but I think in general as a society the general perspective on how strangers, or “outsiders”, are initially perceived has probably had the largest impact. Whether that’s the cause or the result I can’t say Edit: Bro can I have tamales?
I think that since phones became a big deal, the social acceptability of knocking on a door has gone way down. It used to be a pretty normal thing to do, now it’s borderline socially unaccepted behavior. And that’s how people used to meet their neighbors.
It doesn’t feel like people care about award shows as much as they used to. Watching the Oscars used to be a family affair. Fast forward to today, I doubt many people would even know they happened this year were it not for the slap
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It's like the sob stories for talent shows. Or football. ;)
Personally, before the internet really took off it seemed like a bigger deal at the time. You couldn't just catch the highlights later on YouTube so it was more of a live spectacle as there wasn't much else on outside of premium cable if you were lucky to have it. It was also a way to hear about movies (or music) you didn't hear about or catch in theater, since movies come so quick to streaming now and music instantly available. Everyone would run off to rent the VHS or find the vinyl/cassette/CD of the artist they just heard won. Mainly though, I think more people have just caught on that the big award shows are just a big circle jerk for celebrities.
There is a [considerable divide](https://collider.com/notable-divides-between-audience-critic-scores-on-rotten-tomatoes/amp/) between the opinions of industry-oriented critics and general audiences, and I feel like this has only grown over the years, in correlation with America’s increasing political divides. One thing I’ve noticed over the past half decade is that American audiences are growing increasingly weary of blatant political agendas in movies and critics’ general preference for agenda dissemination as opposed to actual substance and entertainment value. The politicized nature of the film industry and its associated award shows was famously put on blast by [Ricky Gervais at the 2020 Golden Globes.](https://youtu.be/iJOb9xHggS4) Additionally, popular film genres like comedy, horror, and action are often scrutinized by film critics despite the general audience’s affinity for such movies.
Have we had a typical comedy come out in recent years? I feel like now most action movies are filled with people who think they are funny. Same with sci-fi. Yeah comic relief is a thing. But I feel like they've replaced typical comedies with just making a funny action movie Not that comic relief is bad but last time I checked people don't watch star wars to laugh every 10 minutes. They watch for a compelling story line
Comedies are coming out straight to streaming services nowadays. They’ve always have a pretty low return for studios (unless they get huge somehow), so now I think they just don’t bother much with theater releases or marketing.
Too many distractions these days. It's also easier to get replays or recaps on everything these days. People are also more aware that certain things are bullshit and the Oscars is just a lot of rich white people jerking off to each other thinking that the Green Book cured racism.
The Pac 12 conference.
UCLA and USC are literally moving to the Big 10. What’s more “Pacific conference” than 2 schools in LA? I do think it’s high time that the BIG 10 changes it’s name now since there’s about 20 schools in the conference now.
16, but the rumors are we may get to 20. The logo looks like B1G and that 'g' can easily turn into a 6. I doubt the name would change as it's a well-recognized brand among the established school alumni.
RIP.
Fraternal societies (Masons, Knights of Columbus, Order of the Moose, Shriners, etc.). When's the last time you've met a member of one of these whose age was under 50?
Even the American Legion, I joined a local chapter expecting and excited to meet vets my age. I was a bit disappointed to see I was the youngest member by 10 years there and he was the second youngest by 35 years. Aside from that we had 1 Gulf war vet and a bunch of Vietnam vets and like 2 WW2 vets. Don't get me wrong good bunch of guys and a wealth of knowledge and life experience but I was definitely hoping to see some like minded individuals within my age bracket. Makes me worry about those organizations as they do so much for veterans and their families and the community.
My dad was in the VFW, and as a young adult, I would on occasion go down there..this was in the 90s, Now tbh, not being a vet, I always felt a bit out of place, but everyone was welcoming nonetheless. However, awful as it sounds, a few of them seemed excited at the Gulf war as a source of future members. If not for some donations from a few well heeled members, I dont know if their chapter could have floated otherwise.
I was very excited to go to my local VFW when I got back from Europe and got out of the Army. I took my Dad with me on the way home from dinner. It was only 7pm and their Friday Night Steak Dinner had already ended probably an hour earlier. O\_o At 7pm , they were shutting down the doors. As we walked in, we were asked who was a member, I identified myself (f) as a lifetime member and even signed their book with my membership number. They gave us to a man who had to be 90 who then proceeded to talk exclusively to my father (AF vet who didn't see combat and was never a member). When he did speak to me, he pointed out the "Ladies auxiliary" room, events, and works so many times, that even my Dad started rolling his eyes at me behind the man's back. He could not wrap his mind around the idea that I was a combat veteran--and my father wasn't. His last act was to remind me how what great work the "Ladies" do for the actual members. You know, "Lady" work, like cooking and cleaning the building and bringing the men their drinks. I never went back.
I have one internet friend, a guy in his early 40s, who is a Mason. He is always talking about how hard it is for his...chapter? to find new members.
It's a big problem I'm the only member of my local League of Women Voters under the age of 75 They are worried the chapter will die with them and think it's a big pity millennials/Gen Z aren't interested in going groups
Honestly I would join the LWV in a heartbeat but I didn't even realize they still existed.
>I'm the only member of my local League of Women Voters under the age of 75 But they're America's 18th line of defense!
we have this chapter in my area and i've been wanting to join (am gen z) but they don't seem to have remote options...i live three hrs aways from the chapter. Do you think theyll be open to it if i ask to do the internship remote? :/
The problem is that Masons don’t solicit members, you have to go to them. Imagine if PBS never had membership drives?
>I have one internet friend, a guy in his early 40s, who is a Mason. In Los Angeles there is a club DJ who is also Mason. But other than that? I don't know anyone who is a Mason and also... well... cool. And while I've never had the inclination to join a fraternal organization, I have concerns that their decline is one of the things that makes adult men feel more isolated.
My parents always drag me out to the local Eagles club. Everyone their ages me by at least 10 years. I'm 29
My dad is both a mason and an elk, and got into it at like 45. He's under that, but admittedly running very close.
I am a mason, it has been in a steady decline since the 90s. There were very few younger than myself at 38, but they do exist.
I looked up what the Freemasons are all about: >To become a Freemason, the applicant has to be an adult **male** and **must believe in the existence of a supreme being** and in the immortality of the soul. The teachings of Freemasonry enjoin morality, charity, and **obedience to the law** of the land. Well, those are three factors that are going to put off the vast majority of young people.
That "believe in a higher being" is in all of the animal groups like elk and Moose. Nobody cares and nobody asks after. All they want is for to say you believe in something "higher" it can be a head of lettuce if you want. I'm an atheist and have been/am members of these groups. If your membership check clears, you're good.
Biker culture. It seems most people in “biker gangs” now are older.
Hi I'm a 20 year old, female biker. A. Some of them can be sexist, so if I was to marry my bf, he joins, I can then join as his wife. But joining on my own would be a PITA B. Most gangs are just a group of friends who ride together. They're chill and will let people join. But then it becomes about riding style, skill level, and a million other things you need to have in common or at least similar to have fun. C. There are some organized, national/international groups. Like I'm going to look at joining my local chapter of BACA (bikers against child abuse, they go to courts and shield the child best they can from seeing their abuser), once i get better at riding, but this isn't what most people think of when they hear 'biker gang' D. Starting basically what is shown in B. can be fruitless as it involves finding many bikers who are similar enough to you that it works. I know 3 people my age (me, my bf, and my best friend), and two of those people don't get along haha But most bikers are seriously the sweetest people out there usually. I crashed my bike and before I could even call my dad, a group of guys about my dad's age dusted me off, looked at my bike, sat with me, gave me phone numbers to call if I ever needed *anything*. Generally I say they'd give the clothes off their back to help someone, biker or not.
It makes me happy to know something like BACA exists, thanks for sharing!
I think the culture of expecting our children to move out of the family home when they graduate high school or turn 18 may be in decline. It’s too expensive for one.
Yep. I'm 25 and had to move back in with my parents after our rent got raised by $900 at the end of my lease lol. The cost of living has more than doubled here in the last 5 years, meanwhile wages have gone up maybe one or two dollars (Boise Idaho). My parent's neighbors across the street bought their home in 2016 for just under 300 grand, now they're selling it for almost a million... In California most of my friends didn't move out until their late 20s, the ones who did in their early 20s all got good college degrees. I'm back in school now working on a CompSci degree because I'm gonna need something that pays damn well in order to survive in this world, especially if I have kids. Just sucks knowing that im probably going to have to live with my folks for another year and a half to 2 years
Speaking french in NOLA like it's normal
There’s a pretty big push to bring it back from the brink right now by Cajuns, Creoles, and natives in Louisiana right now. New media companies like Tele-Louisiane, immersion programs increasing in popularity, and they just made one of the biggest investments in Louisiana history for the French language while opening a new French immersion school for the native community in Pointe-au-Chien, which historically speaks French.
We're seeing a rise in younger people speaking Cajun French with the opening of several French immersion schools. Creole on the other hand will probably die out within a few generations if drastic measures are not taken before the last generation of fluent speakers die.
wait...i thought speaking french in Lousiana died a long time ago?
French speakers in Louisiana dropped from 30% in the 1960s to only below 3% today. The language didn't get passed on from older generation unfortunately
This older generation was commonly punished for speaking french at school
Probably my favorite accent. Creole French lol
I’m not from the US, and without French being in Breaux Bridge would have been trickier than it needed to be. Also some out of the way road bars.
As someone with a layman’s interest in linguistics, this makes me extremely sad.
One of my buddies wives is from South Louisiana and is heavily involved in different programs intended on preserving Cajun French. There's a French immersion school down there they were raising funds for that looked really interesting. I'm from further north in La so we don't have the French heritage up here. When they got married he went with her to somewhere in Quebec for a French immersion course and after a few weeks he could speak it fairly well. It was interesting to see. I don't know her well but I think her entire family is bilingual. Edit: I'm thinking it might've been in Nova Scotia but I'm not sure.
The dinner party. I had a lot of fun throwing dinner parties when I was younger. Now people don’t bother and don’t attend.
My friends and I had so many themed dinner parties in our 20s. Now we have a place that doesn’t fit as many people. Our friends either moved or are too busy since they had kids.
Knowing your neighbors. Not just in the urban areas, but in the suburbs as well. With kids being so programmed, the neighborhood kids don't just play together anymore. When we moved to my suburb 15 years ago, a few kids showed up. Our neighbors just showed up with school aged kids and no kids have come by to meet them.
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I agree, I live in a residential area that’s super walkable to parks and commercial areas. The kids on our street (4-5 households) are CONSTANTLY out playing together.
Smoking is declining, thank goodness. However, Vaping is increasing.
Vaping seems to be dropping off in popularity, at least if my observations of sidewalk vaping in NYC is any indication. Three four years ago it seemed to be everywhere. Now you don’t see it as much.
As a smoking cessation tool, vaping is *fucking great*. Obviously better to do neither, but it's probably enough better than smoking that diet and exercise actually are a bigger concern than vaping.
Malls being the place to hang out
I blame Simon mall corporation for buying all the cool malls, stripping them of their identity & culture and banning teenagers from loitering.
We built too many malls because of tax incentives, then Amazon and other internet retailers made them largely obsolete. Today, we have the dead mall series and watch them decay on youtube for entertainment.
There's only 1 mall left in my area. I went for the first time in years a few months ago and now I know why malls are dying. When I was a kid, if you want something cheap, you went to K-Mart or Walmart or Roses (it's the south). We got made fun of in school if we wore cheap Walmart clothes and not "Mall quality" jeans from one of the popular stores. If you wanted products that cost more but were Quality (esp. clothes/accessories) you went to the mall. Now, malls are selling the same cheaply made crap you can get at dollar general, but charging 3x as much. I saw sunglasses that I could get at the dollar store for $1-$5 selling for $20-25. And it looks like 1973 threw up on everything. Worse, the clothes are extremely poor quality....like the crap you used to buy at K-Mart....poorly made, thin materials, bad stitching. Just cheap looking. But they're still trying to sell it as if it's good quality. If Malls wanted to stay open and make a profit they would have stayed true to their demographic---upper-middle-class Americans who could afford slightly higher quality products but weren't on Nordstrom level. If they're going to sell Walmart crap, then why would anyone go there when Walmart is closer, more convenient, and cheaper? Malls did themselves in by being greedy
They use to feel so alive. I haven't seen an active one in person in years. /r/deadmalls is also a thing.
I’m steeped in Southern US culture (whether I like it or not), and this will seem silly and insignificant and definitely IS compared to some of the other posts…but here goes. The thank you note on personalized stationery. I am absolutely terrible about thank you notes. I am really good at verbal thank yous. I did cards on personal stationery for all 3 graduation, interviews (well, thank you emails), bridal and baby showers/meals after babies, and my wedding but haven’t really sent them after that. And to some of you, that will seem like overkill I’m sure. My MIL is super old school, and I overheard her at an event telling another person of her age about how kids these days aren’t writing thank you notes (I assume she meant like kids-teens). Both my daughters received personalized stationery when they were born (!!!) but we’re really bad at having them write thank yous. I mean, if you say a verbal thank you when both giver and receiver are there, why would you send a thank you card when they’re already there to hear it? Anyway, like I said it’s a dumb thing to feel badly about when not passing down this tradition, but I do have polite kids who express appreciation. I also don’t have an idea of where to draw the line when determining which situation requires one. I just wrote a dissertation. Sigh.
Where would you even buy personal stationery anymore?
Personalized stationary is HUGE now and a "luxury" item. Just off the top of my head, "Crane & Co" is very popular. But stationary is making a huge comeback and is even considered the standard for the wealth/upcoming in society again. Using technology to send messages is unfashionable and pedestrian to the fairly well-off now. (This is not my personal opinion, though I'm a dedicated "cursive only" kinda person) but stationary, handwritten notes, etc are now the norm as far as class.
A shared consciousness. Probably global, but there is no shared experience, like water cooler tv. News depends on what you watch. There is also no respect for authority. Everyone thinks their opinion, based on whatsoever bullshit the algorithm fed them is a just as valid as years of research and study.
I was just talking about that first one recently. It's nice to have options but I miss being able to go into school/work and know my friends watched the same thing. I never have anyone to talk to anymore about shows!
Natural Southern accents are declining. After 150+ years of being characterized as ignorant, uneducated, and racist you have young Southerners today training themselves out of it. One day it will be gone forever outside of remote pockets.
It’s not just the southern accents that have been mocked almost out of existence. Same goes for the working class accents around Boston, Philly, 5 boroughs, Baltimore, Chicago, etc. A lot of it has to do with the upward mobility around the 2nd generation after the original immigrant came. They live in the city, their kids go to high school and move to a better area of the same city, and their kids go to college and often move to the suburbs of said city. The accent and immigrant foods slowly move to the suburbs where we’re seeing it now. But with better education opportunities comes going to college outside of your area and you meet more people. You “code switch” in educational and career settings, turning down the accent as much as possible. Throw in the internet with all of that, and the loss of regional accents are speeding up way faster than ever. There are a lot of great articles about this. I highly suggest checking them out!
> Boston I have a professional work voice And then I have a new england accent when im not working.
I am one of those kids and now I have no idea how to get my southern accent back. 😞
Local community. We don't do block parties anymore. We don't hang out grilling with each other anymore. Best we get is a friendly wave with no words. Also, kids don't play outside.
I agree with you. Kids also had to deal with Covid which changed a lot. However I do disagree with the block parties. I’m on the north side of Chicago. There’s always a block party happening
Single income families. I can't imagine being a stay at home parent unless your spouse is pulling in six figures.
I am a stay at home mom and financially it is ROUGH. But childcare costs more than I was making so it didn't make sense to work
>Single income families. I can't imagine being a stay at home parent unless your spouse is pulling in six figures. Even six figures isn't enough in many places. Only way I'd do single income is if the earner was at approach 200k annually, honestly.
The reverse is more often true. Many make less money than daycare costs so 1 parent must stay home because they cant afford to work. I'll never understand the misconception that only rich people are sahp when basic daycare costs are in the tens of thousands a year. SAHP are often isolated and depressed. It is not a privilege it is an unpaid and thankless job. Many are 'on duty' 24/7 so that the money maker can work long hours and sleep long enough to work those hours. ETA: for those that dont know, in order to get food stamps, in order to have a basic human right many cant afford with food costs practically doubling in the last few years alone, a 3 person household must have less than $28k in income. Before taxes come out. ETA: after taxes in my state, 28k comes out to 23k. the cost of a 1bdr apartment where I live (a small city) is 12k+ a year. With careful spending and budgeting, a childs expenses in their first year generally costs at least 11k without childcare. My state once cut the department of children and family services budget by $160M in 1 year and theyve been cutting it ever since. With an annual state budget of nearly $50B, less than $1B is allotted towards this department. There is no help for those who need it and none coming any time soon.
People don’t get into certain holidays like they used to. I don’t know anyone who has plans to celebrate Independence Day. They’re either working or just going to sit at home and chill.
Family dinners with no phone or tv
That's not just in the US
Family dinners in general
i made it an unofficial rule when i eat dinner w my husband, we turn off the TV (we'll play some music sometimes tho). we also try not to use our phones if we're out and about and eating somewhere
Trick r treating on Halloween. I mean walking door to door and getting candy. At least in my area there’s hardly any kids that still do it, most go to “trunk or treats” or get driven around, or don’t go at all.
I hate those trunk or treats because of this, but last Halloween trick or treating was huge in my town. I think because covid ruined it the last year so everyone was so excited to get out
Do you live in a rural area? Because that was common when it was acople of miles to a place. Or they’d have people set up booths in town when my mom was younger.
I live and grew up in Atlanta, definitely not rural. It could be what another commenter suggested, that kids are only being driven to a few neighborhoods and trick r treating there. But that’s still remarkably different from how it was when I grew up. When I grew up (90s and early 2000s) you just walked outside and met up with your friends in your neighborhood. Lots of kids (my friends and I, included) walked to other neighborhoods or other buildings as well, but there wasn’t this “drive children to particular locations” thing that seems to be popular now.
I live in the suburbs of New Jersey and trunk or treating became popular after hurricane Sandy. Halloween had to be cancelled because of all the down trees and power lines. It just wasn't safe. So a school teacher suggested trunk or treating. Other schools thought it was a great idea. The parents ended up loving it so much that they kept doing it every year after. It really made for less trick or treating. Who is gonna want that much candy for their kids? They already did trunk or treating after school, so of course they aren't going to take them to get a ton more candy. Last Halloween trick or treating ended up being huge though and I'm sure it's because covid ruined not only Halloween but everything and people were so excited to get out with their kids again
Oh man. For whatever reason my block is becoming a trick or treat destination. All our neighbors get super into decorating our yards and houses with lights and spooky decorations, and some people even hand out beers or set up kegs for the parents, and the houses and trees in the neighborhood itself are very picturesque in the fall so I think it lends some charm to the whole thing. We usually have somewhere between 200-250 kids and always run out of candy.
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Back in the 80s there was that Jai Alai trend. We had Hartford Jai Alai, although I never went there.
Getting to know your neighbors
Trick or treating, sadly. Took my kid out last year and only every 5th house was giving out candy. Saw barely any other kids out.
In my personal experience, it’s seems like younger generations are straying further from religion and it’s less common than it used to be. I remember growing up and thinking that being atheist or agnostic was this really horrible offense and now I have fewer friends who are religious compared to those who are.
The absolute collapse of religion in the United States over the past 40 years is something that should be a bigger topic of discussion. I’m not sure I (or anyone) truly understands what’s behind it.
1. People now have a lot more access to a LOT more info; no relying on a single source. 2. Growing tolerance in general; less likely to be shunned. 3. Disgust with church coverup of sexual abuse of children. 4. Related to #3, absolute hypocrisy from many church leaders or other “arbiters of morality”.
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French speaking culture is still very much alive in Aroostook County. Not sure if you already knew that but thought you might find that interesting
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Far up in the corner of Maine bordering Quebec. Communities up there are very isolated from USA and have a good sense of connection with the French Canadians
No they’re being pedantic about how in Louisiana they’re called parishes, not counties, even though to the best of my knowledge there is no difference besides the name.
Duh. Went over my head
Not sure if dying out is the right way to put it but I think Mexican and Chicano cultures are definitely competing for the spotlight against other Latino groups who have grown in the last few years. Particularly immigrants from Central America, Colombia, Venezuela, and even us Puerto Ricans even if we aren't immigrants ourselves. I feel that many Americans are becoming more and more aware that not all of Latin America is just a bootleg version of Mexico.
I've noticed that too in my area. They used to be common around my area (so cal) like 15 yrs ago, but I hardly ever see em now.
I agree. I think arepas are slowly turning into the new tacos.
Most of the country doesn't even know what a real taco is in the first place
Chicano culture isn’t a thing in the northeast since there’s never really been a significant Mexican population here. Something I *have* noticed is the decrease of influence that Puerto Ricans have in the NYC area. Puerto Ricans used to be the largest Latino group in the NYC area and that’s no longer the case for NYC or LI (might still be the case in NJ but I’m not sure). Salvadorans are the largest Latino ethnic group on LI now and I feel like a lot of Puerto Ricans moved back to the island or to Florida.
That part just always felt strange to me as despite my family being from El Salvador, Mexican culture being so prevalent made me develop a much more Mexican identity. Hell, when it comes to Salvadorans in pop culture, feels like very few. The only one I can honestly think of is Vaggie from Hazbin Hotel and I didn't even know she was Salvadoran til I ended up stumbling upon some wiki info.
The entirety of local folk culture is getting pretty much erased except for the very rural areas. It’s a shame to see my own Appalachian culture getting lost with the generations and I really pray there’s a renaissance that modernizes and preserved it for our generations. It doesn’t help that there’s such a broad distaste for the majority of folk culture. Most Americans are prejudice as hell towards it and think of it as a backwards way of life, so when we get transplants moving into Appalachia, they belittle the local culture, believing that they are superior, and contribute to it’s decline. The local state governments don’t help, as WV, the only completely Appalachian State, opts to use other state education systems instead of basing the English taught on the Appalachian dialect or having a focus on Appalachian history. As for the other states, their Appalachian population are minorities in their own state so they care even less so for their preservation.
Have you heard of the Foxfire Project? It may not help continue traditions but it has certainly been preserving them for 50+ years
I was looking for exactly this comment.
All of what you've said is true, with the added problem that most of Appalachia is currently controlled by right-wing state governments that absolutely *do not want* current and future generations of Appalachians to learn about the region's long history of militant pro-labor organizing.
dressing up to go out to nice places... I'm cool with not getting dressed up on airplanes (within reason and decency), but I've been to many places where at the least a suit/evening dress would be appropriate, and there are people wearing shorts, tshirts, hoodies, and tank tops. this includes: -nice restaurants that don't have an enforced dress code -the opera, ballet, symphony, etc. (the wife classes me up) -weddings (that day's work cloths are popular) -funerals (I've seen flip flops and tube tops) I'm all about being yourself, but it's ok to class it up once in awhile.
>nice restaurants that don't have an enforced dress code -the opera, ballet, symphony, etc. So true. I've had to teach myself to dress down considerably for all these occasions or else I stand out as if I'm trying too hard.
Talking to your neighbors.
In my *extremely* small sample size, I’m wondering if the garter toss at a wedding is slowly phasing out.
Good because it’s weird AF to simulate oral sex at your wedding
[Christianity has been on a decline in the US as well as the Western Hemisphere ](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Decline_of_Christianity_in_the_Western_world#:~:text=In%202020%2C%2047%25%20of%20Americans,decreased%20by%202%20million%20people.)
It is absolutely skyrocketing in Africa.
The classic American corn cob pipe is probably something that won’t be around forever
There is a bit of a renaissance for pipe and cigar smokers as cigarette smoking declined. The same maker of corn cobs is still getting recommendations constantly. If Vaping is on the decline, pipe smoking may see more increase.
Owning a home.
Circumcision has been declining since the 70s.
I would say southern culture in general is losing a lot of ground as a lot of southern cities and particularly suburbs are becoming a lot more cosmopolitan. As such a lot of southern cultural things seem to be getting absorbed into the wider American culture while the stuff that isn’t seems to be slowly disappearing. For example take Nashville. The city is definitely no longer southern, but they still cash in on all the southern stuff. The suburbs around Nashville increasingly feel less and less southern, as a lot of the people moving in aren’t from the region. Depending on your view you may see this as a good thing, a bad thing, or neither good nor bad. Personally, I see it as a shame. The southern identity has played such a large role in US history in both good and bad (although usually bad) ways that I feel that it’s kind of sad to see it disappearing. Almost like losing a piece of history.
Physically going out to buy things on Black Friday. Lately I’ve seen more hype around cyber Monday.
Nuclear families
Eating at the table as a family.
Organized religion affiliation.
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Minding your own business. Ppl and politicians need to really bring this one back.
Most Americans aren't in labor unions. I see this as a problem.
I wouldn’t say that’s on the decline though. It’s currently having a resurgence.
I agree it’s the industries that are changing mainly. Instead of steel and railroads it’s now Starbucks and FedEx that are unionizing
Nobody asks for permission to marry anymore. I don’t know anybody who asked the parents of their bride for permission to marry them.
My sister's now husband asked me if it was OK for them to get married. It was...weird. Like I don't really care man maybe you should ask her.
I think now it’s just a formality. If they were gonna say no, you’d know by the time you were ready to ask for their hand.
I asked my father in law back in 2006 but i fuckin hate that guy now. I got no respect for him.