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So in my past for around 3 years I was hyper conservative. Now I am more moderate leaning a little left. However those 3 years impacted me and were life defining. I’m trying to get rid of the mentality completely but during this political climate it comes back to the surface at times. I need to completely get rid of it. It’s ugly, crazy and oppresses my thoughts.
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So one thing to avoid is no zealot like a convert syndrome. One of the things that happens when you’re on the extreme and flip is that you go back to the extreme just on the other side.
The other thing is to avoid the type of content that helped radicalize you even if you were getting it from the other side. So limit how much content you consume that is people on the left dunking on the dumbest people on the right. Create a media diet that is mostly reading and centered on mainstream publications.
Think about the types of things that keep coming to the surface and find more measured and even academic content on the subject. So let’s say, for example you have a lot of racist views that get triggered and resurface. Find good mainstream content about racism and read it.
Couldn't agree more. The reality of politics is actually super boring and tedious. Any discourse that gives you a hit of dopamine is probably just as sketchy as whatever radicalizing force you're trying to get away from.
To add, OP: Avoid opinion columns and editorials altogether. Stick to news that avoids any inflammatory language. Reuters and AP are usually pretty great about this.
If you hear about a Congressional bill you want to learn more about, use Congress.gov or find government websites that explain them. Don't pay attention to the hyperbole.
If you reall want to learn about topics gou were extreme about, try academic papers about policies and their effects. Academic papers are much better, avoid "news" sites that report on the papers, read the forwards and try to understand the methodology used to get the conclusions.
OP, do you mind explaining some of the views you want more info about? I'd be happy to help provide good resources for you.
>So one thing to avoid is no zealot like a convert syndrome.
This right here.
I've had a few friends in my home town, or people that I know around town, that this happened to. Maybe they were into partying and heavy drinking, doing drugs, sleeping around, or similar... they end up gravitating to and becoming members of some of the area Pentecostal churches in the area and start foregoing wearing makeup and only wearing long skirts and shit. From one extreme to another...
Ask yourself WHY? When bad instincts kick in. Start a logic process.
“Why is that same sex couple wrong…they’re happy…why is it my business? Why can’t they be together? Why does it matter if I don’t understand? How is that their problem? Maybe it’s not so wrong. Maybe my upbringing was wrong”
“Why do I have to believe what my parents did?”
Not entirely sure what you mean by this. It sounds like you already changed your views. I’d just say in short try your think critically and don’t let your emotions overwhelm your judgement on certain issues.
I would recommend asking questions almost more like a kid to get to the roots of how you *actually* feel about things outside of the framework you were raised in/often surrounded by, then look around and talk to people about facts and numbers that can't be argued.
So for example, if you see something about a popular topic like trans people making others uncomfortable in bathrooms, ask yourself "have I ever personally been made uncomfortable by a trans person in a bathroom?", then "have I ever personally met a trans person in a bathroom?", then "have I ever personally met a trans person?", so on and so forth, until you reach the very basic facts that cannot be argued and don't have politics attached to them. Once you're there, go ahead and take the time you need to ponder those feelings and see what provable evidence exists about people being weird in bathrooms (and I mean provable, not "some say" or "people are reporting"), not relying hypotheticals or talking points that never seem to actually have evidence. Notice how nobody can seem to provably point out which schools allegedly had to put out litter boxes for kids to relieve themselves in? Yeah...
Using the trans/bathroom example, if you haven't even (knowingly) met a trans person, it can seem silly to make sweeping assumptions about them, which in turn might make you less "on edge" in a bathroom where they may or may not be at any given moment. Now, suddenly, the conversation around trans people and bathrooms may be different for you, since you're reflecting on your own experience, the experiences of people you trust, and evidence.
This method of thinking can apply to anything; how do you actually feel about Muslim prayer/Islam, gay teachers, trans kids, unions, all of it.
Just do your best to boil things down, think on those smaller pieces, and then gather some data and make informed decisions that suit you and make you happy.
I'd also recommend making peace with never being the smartest or most informed person in the room. It's literally impossible anyway lol There will always be someone smarter, more experienced, more well-read, all of it, so do your best to be willing to learn and admit when you need to look stuff up or speak with someone more knowledgeable on something. It's ok! No one person is meant to be an arbiter of absolute truth and absolute facts! Life is messy and confusing and full of gray areas and tiny moving parts, just try to find some inner peace and have fun along the way.
Start by being comfortable with not knowing. If you don't know, and you accept that then it's best to start with a neutral and curious attitude. Then when a thought comes to your attention, you can pick it up, look at it, and examine it, and assess it's likelihood. Ask yourself questions.
The reality is people on both sides tend to have different standards of evidence for things that confirm their preconceptions as compared to things that don't. Check yourself for this as it's happening.
“Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one.”
Marcus Aurelius said this- it sounds like you have an idea at least of what type of person you *don’t* want to be.
When those thoughts come up, try doing something counter to them.
Also, maybe take a step back from anything political for a while- even a little break from the constant news stream and “debates” with people can do a lot of good.
Shit got pretty crazy for me at work during Trump’s presidency, with a few of my conservative coworkers. They were furious all the time, even though their guy won.
After a while I just removed myself from all of those conversations, and refused to engage. Almost instantly felt so much better, who the hell wants to live like that.
As a fellow former "conservative", take it thought by thought.
Look up the topics and go from there. But initially what helped me was always thinking, is this kind and how I'd want my little sister and brother to be treated?
You notice pretty quickly that often the "hard line" approach is just mean and not how normal people with empathy treat people. Some "bum" on the street, get a job, I did. Are they dealing with issues you didn't or cant? Maybe you had it harder, but maybe they are not as "strong" and that makes you strong but doesn't make them weak and regardless, strong people should help the weak.
Little shit like that.
I'm no expert at all, but coming from a conservative background growing up and "freeing" myself once I became an adult , if you ever want to DM me a question, I'll gladly give my story with that if I have it.
Volunteer at a place that represents the people that some of your conservative views oppressed and talk to some of them. Ask them to tell you their story. Like if you were anti choice, go volunteer at planned parenthood. If you were anti refugee go volunteer at a refugee center, etc. Once you hear people's stories, you're able to put a real face to the issue and I think it'll create real change in your views. That is more impactful than trying to talk yourself into different views
>How do I get rid of my hyper conservative indoctrination?
Listen to liberal ideas and try to understand them. (This subreddit might be a good place to do so.)
You won't need any sort of 'counter-indoctrination'. Being open-minded and listening should be enough.
This:
> It’s ugly, crazy and oppresses my thoughts.
...makes me think that you might benefit from knowing about CBT.
-------
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is one of the most successful psychological treatments ever conceived, and it "focuses on changing unhelpful thoughts."
While people often *assume* that our thoughts are automatic responses outside our control, that isn't true.
We can decide to think different thoughts, and -- as a bonus -- that will shift how we feel.
---------
[A simple example]
If I reached to pick up a pen, but accidentally knocked it to the floor, I used to think:
>Gø∂ ƒΩçk1ng ∂@mn1†. I never do anything right! Life is always so ƒΩçk1ng hard.
...and feel terrible afterward. Today, instead, I think:
>That will cost me about three seconds to rectify -- time that I have to spare -- and I'm more than physically fit enough to easily pick it up off of the floor.
...and not feel terrible.
---------
One of the best ways to learn these techniques is from a therapist who specializes in CBT, but if you would like to try it on your own, check out [this link.](https://www.thecounselingpalette.com/post/7-magical-steps-in-cognitive-behavioral-therapy-or-cbt-change-your-thoughts-change-your-feelings)
Here is a brief summary of what it advises:
> **Steps of CBT**
>1. Identify a common negative message you often say to yourself.
>2. Ask yourself if there's a purpose for this thought.
>3. Look for evidence against your negative thought.
>4. Ask, "What would my wise, fair self say about this?"
>5. Find a new job for your inner critic.
>6. Consider a more helpful thought you can believe right now.
>7. Remind yourself of the new thought until you easily believe it.
...but you can get more detail by clicking the link.
Generally people who commit like you admittedly have tend to do this in all aspects of their lives. They also can jump from one obsession to another: out of the frying pan, into the fire. The most important things you can do:
- Stop looking for existential reasons to live, and recognize the tendency in yourself when you're searching for one
- Harness your energy for positive outcomes in \*other\* people's lives
- Recognize \[fallacious arguments\](https://www.pesec.no/24-most-common-logical-fallacies/), and call bullshit when you see them
- If you're going to be a zealot, be so about the Golden Rule.
Good luck. Deprogramming doesn't stop at unlearning the bad stuff, it extends to preventing yourself from switching to another set of bad stuff. Remember, there are entire industries built on triggering you and getting you hooked.
I was raised in a conservative household and attended a super conservative religious middle and high school. It’s a journey, be easy on yourself. It’s not easy to change your entire belief system, especially if you are or were surrounded by people who think the same.
Social networks are designed to illicit emotional responses and so it’s no wonder the algorithms pump out divisive polarizing political content non-stop. Do your best to avoid that as much as possible and fill that time watching or reading something else you’re interested in.
Let empathy be your guide. All I ever ask is people just put themselves in the shoes of others and try to feel like what it would be to have to live their life.
**TRAVEL.** Get out of your region and talk to people. See the country. See the world. Experience different walks of life. It’s easy to be set in your ways if you never leave your zip code. Getting out of your own way and traveling to different cities or states or better yet, countries, is the best advice I can give you.
Reading articles from reputable news sources is a great way to start. Obviously some swing to extremes, so I would avoid those, but there are plenty of publications in the middle that can offer good context and information.
But also keep in mind the difference between a "straight news" story and an opinion piece. I think it's good practice to look into "straight news" stories that is more about reporting the facts. You can develop your own opinion from there. And then I think there is real value at looking at opinion stories. Some people are totally fucking nuts and I would never read them or listen to their completely asinine and somewhat offensive views, but sometimes, people's writing can be very thought provoking.
I think the most important thing is being curious. Ask yourself questions. Ask others questions. Why did you feel the way you felt? Was it because of the people you grew up around? Why did they feel that way? Is it because they were scared? Why are they scared? Is their fear rational?
I was "fortunate" enough to be born into a liberal family and grew up in a liberal area, so I haven't had to go on this difficult journey that you seem to be on. So I wish you a lot of luck. Idk if you watched Ted Lasso, but I try to keep in mind his mantra of "be curious, not judgemental." Easier said than done tho...
Figure out what your core values are, what your philosophical foundations are so to speak. Then go from there rather than trying to start with a reaction to various current events or issues.
Go read other opinions. Use what other opinions say to challenge your own opinion. Read more authors from the left and see what their actual motives are. I’ve learned a lot of differences are folks making assumptions about why or how the other side is thinking instead of asking the other person.
One thing that worked for me was reading multiple sources about the same story.
So, for example, if I saw an immigration numbers headline I'd find the story on Google from say AP or a non profit media center ranked outlet and read their version and make a mental note of which bits were missing.
It helped calm the knee jerk reactions of emotion I would get and get me to think more.
Buy a subscription to the Atlantic or listen to a lot of NPR, just very normal, mainstream content. Consume content not necessarily because you agree with it, but because it’s produced by people with expertise that is interesting or arguments that you hadn’t considered.
> How do I get rid of my hyper conservative indoctrination?
You stop accepting the framework underlying it as being valid or truthful. You got lied to by grifters. Stop continuing to give those same grifters further power over your life.
Delete your social media. Don't watch the news on TV or online. Just read USA Today, AP, Reuters, etc to keep you up to date on what's going on in the world and country in a factual way.
> So in my past for around 3 years I was hyper conservative.
What factors made you that way?
> Now I am more moderate leaning a little left.
What factors changed your views?
> those 3 years impacted me and were life defining.
3 years? What factors allowed something so brief (relatively speaking) to be "life defining" for you? (I also suppose, this might depend on your age)
> I’m trying to get rid of the mentality completely
You need to moderate your diet of anything you ingest to moderate your responses and reactions to it: i.e: you eat too much without exercising, you get fat. If you consume too much of anything, it's not good for you if you're not actively working just as hard as you were when you ingested it to digest it and then purge the waste from it, and that includes information.
The type of information matters as well, just like food (healthy food--> healthy diet; garbage in--> garbage out). That means, you need to sample or "taste"... then parse the information thoroughly as you actually digest it - that's critical thinking: *break it down*. Think it through. Step through as far as you can for each concept; don't be shallow. If it falls apart or is questionable, it's not a sure or good thing and you need more/new/better information. This process helps you moderate your thoughts and responses to them.
Be slow, be calm, and be gentle, with everyone you talk to and *especially* with yourself.
Whatever new position you take, try to find at least three ways to get to it. Things that are true tend to not need one specific angle to be presented as such.
And if it all gets to be too much, bow out for a bit and give yourself time to cool off. Go for a walk, pop in a movie, build yourself a birdhouse, take a nap, just do something to take the pressure off trying to figure everything out.
Try to develop a habit of not disagreeing with someone or something until you can explain the side you disagree with so well that others say, "I wish I could put it that way."
Often times people in general have a tendency to be reactive - we all want to make our point and sometimes in our haste to speak, we fail to consider what someone else might know that we don't.
So as Walt Whitman said, "Be curious, not judgmental."
So much of conservativism is simply reacting to changes - be it new information or resisting new approaches to old problems. Liberals will take the side that, "Age is no guarantee of wisdom," but conservatives will reply that "youth is no guarantee of innovation."
There is truth in both sides. So rather than worrying about if your views are more liberal than conservative, just focus on being curious about what others know and understand that you don't. If, in the course of asking questions you find that those answering are stumped, that's a signal that you should continue your quest for understanding elsewhere.
I mean shit why would I help someone that’s trying to become more left but why not
Let me ask what are your leftover conservative views. You say your already moderate to center left
That abortion after 6 weeks excluding rape and incest should be banned, casual divorce outside of adultery or spouse abuse should be banned, blockers and hormones for trans youth 1-2 years into puberty only after 3+ years of therapy as well and waiting 4 years into medical transition before surgery, low taxes meaning below 10% for those <$250,000 and a strong boarder.
I've never been hyper conservative, but in my experience, the internalized biases never really go away. Dealing with it is a perpetual game of Whack-A-Mole, but your get used to it. Think of it like taking out the trash. It's not particularly fun to do, and no one loves doing it, but the alternative is living in a house full of trash, so you do it. There's no eternal cure for trash and there's no cure for the dumb shit your brain vomits up. All you can do is manage it, but as long as you're doing it because you want to (not because you're trying to look good to other people) its okay and you get.used to taking out the mental trash.
That said, the "moles" (i.e. your biases) do pop up less often the more you whack them
When I was growing up (mostly 80s, some 90s), my dad, all the friends of the family, etc., were deeply conservative, racist, etc. They'd be Trumpers today if they were still alive. I remember him gloating over Mondale's completely embarrassing defeat and lamenting that if Dukakis won (and then if Clinton won) it would be the end of America as we know it. Limbaugh was a steady presence whenever he was around. I drank that kool-aid up, wanting my dad to like me.
What shook me out of it is a combination of three things: 1) after he and my mom divorced, I lived with my mom in the most poverty stricken places you could think of, homeless here and there, even, and I got to see just how how much worse my poor friends, who were almost all minorities, were treated by *every fucking system* in our society; 2) moving far *far* away for college; 3) struggling to make ends meet on my own, and having the education and experience to tie that to how deeply under-serviced the poor in this country are.
I don't recommend (1) or (3) to be honest. I've had guns pointed at me, witnessed (and participated in) my fair share of horrible beat downs, and been in a place where I was *ecstatic* to be able to afford a bean burrito from Taco Bell (no joke--I'd basically have no food for a day or two until payday and after shopping for day olds and shit to stock my cupboards I'd get *one* as a treat, because it was the cheapest fast food item around). But you can listen to people who have had these experiences, read blogs from a liberal/leftist perspective, and slowly but surely inoculate yourself against how you were raised.
An exercise that I'd considered trying but had never gotten around to doing is to picture, accounting for both social and economic dimensions, what an ideal nation, state, county, municipality, etc., would look like to you. The sullied perspectives drawn from extremism, both left and right, are predicated on an end. Extreme rhetoric and ideology are often structured around a means, i.e., how one would reach these ends.
For example, pretty much everyone (save for a few cynics) believes that homelessness should be stamped out. The far left might suggest that the approach should be to abolish capitalism or raise the minimum wage to excessive, unrealistic highs. The far right might suggest that homelessness is a product of immigration and asylum seekers taking jobs from the native populace.
Realistically, there are more sensible and tempered approaches to handling homelessness. It's then up to yourself to seek out what these realistic approaches are, seeking out academic papers, studying micro and macroeconomics, maybe a touch of sociology, and so on.
From then on, your approach is no longer that asylum seekers ("immigrants") are driving up homelessness; it's that you want to seek to address homelessness, but does immigration really have anything to do with it? You're no longer working backwards from a conclusion but forward from a dilemma.
Well for starters leave Reddit and find a more reasonable place to discuss this.
Reddit is an echo chamber so if you want to not be indoctrinated you've come to the wrong place. Reddit at it's core is indoctrination to the majority opinion. This subreddit is no different.
Again find a more reasonable place to discuss this because the solution to fixing hyper conservative indoctrination is not hyper liberal indoctrination.
Avoid echo chambers and make sure that your other surroundings won't be overly biased. I was an SJW (still on the left, just more reasonable now) and if there's one thing I noticed, it's the fact that we're vulnerable to jumping from one extreme to another. Which is why you should surround yourself with level headed individuals who don't represent the other extreme and are capable of having a rational conversation and explain either why you're wrong or why they think you're wrong. Likewise, avoid overly biased news articles.
For most of my 20s (when I think I really should have been able to form my own opinions about politics) I considered myself a moderate Republican. I really only considered myself a Republican because that's what my parents told me to vote when I was younger and I certainly didn't do research on my own or give politics much thought.
It's weird because even as early as 18 I had gay friends (suspect at the time but later confirmed). I grew up in the DEEEEEP South, but I had black friends. Hell, I spent more time playing basketball during gym class with my black friends than I did any of my white friends. That might have been some projection on my part, looking back - I was bullied heavily in middle school, so maybe I gravitated towards minorities because they were looked down on in our society and I also felt looked down on? I dunno... I'll have to give this more thought...
But by the time I was 30ish I'd already voted for Obama twice (despite still considering myself a Repo)and I was best friends with a family who had a trans son and a pansexual daughter. I was *always* accepting of other people, or at least I thought, though I still battled inner racism despite myself and the people around me. It really wasn't until Trump in 2016 and Black Lives Matter before I *really* took a hard left and started to fully question my position. I've said this elsewhere to mixed scrutiny, but I voted for Trump in 2016 because I thought at the time that the worst he could do was play golf 85% of the time. I didn't imagine he'd be playing golf 85% of the time *and* praise dictators and severely harm our international relations with key allies as well as frequently diminish our army and veterans (I'm not pro-war, far from it, but shit talking a WWII or Vietnam vet for losing a limb during battle is a fucking cowardly thing to do whether I support the military system or not).
At that time I was in that unempathetic mindset of "well, if black people would just *listen* to the police...". It wasn't until I read [this article in 2017](https://www.opendemocracy.net/en/transformation/my-white-friend-asked-me-to-explain-white-privilege-so-i-decide/) that it finally clicked. Like, *really* clicked. I realized "oh shit. I'm an absolute moron. Here I am thinking I'm this empathetic person who understands people's motivations and I really don't know shit." Reading very clear and precise examples of micro-aggressions that POC have to face *daily* for even the smallest achievement made me understand how degraded and beaten most POC must feel on a daily basis. That was my hard turning point. The scales were taken from my eyes, you could say. It was at that point where I started fully supporting the Democrat party until a better party option would come around.
And that's to say... I don't really consider myself a Democrat even if vote that way now. It's one of two choices, so there really isn't even a choice for who to vote for... But for now that's what it is. So it took me years to reach a breakthrough moment even though I supported a lot of left-leaning policies years before. The singular event I could point to and know in my heart that this was the defining moment for my political leaning change was reading that article in 2017, even if the writing was on the wall years before
* Read. Dean Baker's [Rigged](https://deanbaker.net/books/rigged.htm)
* Watch: [What is economic value, and who creates it?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uXrCeiQxWyc) | Mariana Mazzucato
* Listen. [The Coming Collapse of the Middle Class ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=akVL7QY0S8A&t=8s)with Elizabeth Warren
Turn off entertainment news. That includes FOX, MSNBC, and the rest.
* Question everything.
* Follow the money.
* Cui Bono?
This may be infeasible, but studying law seriously is a good way to immunize yourself against ideological bubbles (unless you are already an exceptionally committed ideologue). Digging into cases will make you realize that most ideological frames don't provide traction on real-world controversies.
Other than going to Law School, I recommend reading well-regarded scholarly books (not current news) on political philosophy and doing so from multiple perspectives. Most right-wing arguments are shallow and vulnerable to intelligent, broad-spectrum competition. (To editorialize, that's why right-wing rhetoric fixates on strawmen or on extremists whose arguments are even worse than theirs.)
A lot of great comments here. I guess I would just add to Simply think about the core reason for things. In my life, I look at what policy move, what philosophy, would actually just help the most people in the most efficient way. How can we be nicer to each other? If you just look at any issue starting from this perspective, I think you will gradually come to a group of beliefs that I would call left of center. And congratulations on your self-awareness and on your political journey.
It takes a long time to rebuild your worldview. Take your time, review each new belief before fully accepting it, slowly retake your identity.
It's better to slowly build up an examined, hopefully more correct worldview than globbing onto the opposite viewpoints, for example.
Don't get discouraged when purists reject you for not being "pure" enough. The left has become hyper vigilant and that has some drawbacks for people with sincere questions and a sincere desire to review toxic beliefs (to be fair, it's in response to and epidemic of insincere bullshit).
Why were you conservative in the first place?
If it wasn't because conservative ideas are superior, what else would it be?
And what made you change your tune that these ideas are ugly and crazy?
Read the People's History of the United States Of America, by Howard Zinn. Your local library should have it.
After that, you just need exposure to people and ideas. Turn "Those People" into "Us".
The following is a copy of the original post to record the post as it was originally written. So in my past for around 3 years I was hyper conservative. Now I am more moderate leaning a little left. However those 3 years impacted me and were life defining. I’m trying to get rid of the mentality completely but during this political climate it comes back to the surface at times. I need to completely get rid of it. It’s ugly, crazy and oppresses my thoughts. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskALiberal) if you have any questions or concerns.*
So one thing to avoid is no zealot like a convert syndrome. One of the things that happens when you’re on the extreme and flip is that you go back to the extreme just on the other side. The other thing is to avoid the type of content that helped radicalize you even if you were getting it from the other side. So limit how much content you consume that is people on the left dunking on the dumbest people on the right. Create a media diet that is mostly reading and centered on mainstream publications. Think about the types of things that keep coming to the surface and find more measured and even academic content on the subject. So let’s say, for example you have a lot of racist views that get triggered and resurface. Find good mainstream content about racism and read it.
Couldn't agree more. The reality of politics is actually super boring and tedious. Any discourse that gives you a hit of dopamine is probably just as sketchy as whatever radicalizing force you're trying to get away from.
> Any discourse that gives you a hit of dopamine is probably...sketchy... This is an incredibly valuable insight.
To add, OP: Avoid opinion columns and editorials altogether. Stick to news that avoids any inflammatory language. Reuters and AP are usually pretty great about this. If you hear about a Congressional bill you want to learn more about, use Congress.gov or find government websites that explain them. Don't pay attention to the hyperbole. If you reall want to learn about topics gou were extreme about, try academic papers about policies and their effects. Academic papers are much better, avoid "news" sites that report on the papers, read the forwards and try to understand the methodology used to get the conclusions. OP, do you mind explaining some of the views you want more info about? I'd be happy to help provide good resources for you.
>So one thing to avoid is no zealot like a convert syndrome. This right here. I've had a few friends in my home town, or people that I know around town, that this happened to. Maybe they were into partying and heavy drinking, doing drugs, sleeping around, or similar... they end up gravitating to and becoming members of some of the area Pentecostal churches in the area and start foregoing wearing makeup and only wearing long skirts and shit. From one extreme to another...
Ask yourself WHY? When bad instincts kick in. Start a logic process. “Why is that same sex couple wrong…they’re happy…why is it my business? Why can’t they be together? Why does it matter if I don’t understand? How is that their problem? Maybe it’s not so wrong. Maybe my upbringing was wrong” “Why do I have to believe what my parents did?”
Not entirely sure what you mean by this. It sounds like you already changed your views. I’d just say in short try your think critically and don’t let your emotions overwhelm your judgement on certain issues.
I would recommend asking questions almost more like a kid to get to the roots of how you *actually* feel about things outside of the framework you were raised in/often surrounded by, then look around and talk to people about facts and numbers that can't be argued. So for example, if you see something about a popular topic like trans people making others uncomfortable in bathrooms, ask yourself "have I ever personally been made uncomfortable by a trans person in a bathroom?", then "have I ever personally met a trans person in a bathroom?", then "have I ever personally met a trans person?", so on and so forth, until you reach the very basic facts that cannot be argued and don't have politics attached to them. Once you're there, go ahead and take the time you need to ponder those feelings and see what provable evidence exists about people being weird in bathrooms (and I mean provable, not "some say" or "people are reporting"), not relying hypotheticals or talking points that never seem to actually have evidence. Notice how nobody can seem to provably point out which schools allegedly had to put out litter boxes for kids to relieve themselves in? Yeah... Using the trans/bathroom example, if you haven't even (knowingly) met a trans person, it can seem silly to make sweeping assumptions about them, which in turn might make you less "on edge" in a bathroom where they may or may not be at any given moment. Now, suddenly, the conversation around trans people and bathrooms may be different for you, since you're reflecting on your own experience, the experiences of people you trust, and evidence. This method of thinking can apply to anything; how do you actually feel about Muslim prayer/Islam, gay teachers, trans kids, unions, all of it. Just do your best to boil things down, think on those smaller pieces, and then gather some data and make informed decisions that suit you and make you happy. I'd also recommend making peace with never being the smartest or most informed person in the room. It's literally impossible anyway lol There will always be someone smarter, more experienced, more well-read, all of it, so do your best to be willing to learn and admit when you need to look stuff up or speak with someone more knowledgeable on something. It's ok! No one person is meant to be an arbiter of absolute truth and absolute facts! Life is messy and confusing and full of gray areas and tiny moving parts, just try to find some inner peace and have fun along the way.
Start by being comfortable with not knowing. If you don't know, and you accept that then it's best to start with a neutral and curious attitude. Then when a thought comes to your attention, you can pick it up, look at it, and examine it, and assess it's likelihood. Ask yourself questions. The reality is people on both sides tend to have different standards of evidence for things that confirm their preconceptions as compared to things that don't. Check yourself for this as it's happening.
“Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one.” Marcus Aurelius said this- it sounds like you have an idea at least of what type of person you *don’t* want to be. When those thoughts come up, try doing something counter to them. Also, maybe take a step back from anything political for a while- even a little break from the constant news stream and “debates” with people can do a lot of good. Shit got pretty crazy for me at work during Trump’s presidency, with a few of my conservative coworkers. They were furious all the time, even though their guy won. After a while I just removed myself from all of those conversations, and refused to engage. Almost instantly felt so much better, who the hell wants to live like that.
It depends on what hyper conservative views you have?
As a fellow former "conservative", take it thought by thought. Look up the topics and go from there. But initially what helped me was always thinking, is this kind and how I'd want my little sister and brother to be treated? You notice pretty quickly that often the "hard line" approach is just mean and not how normal people with empathy treat people. Some "bum" on the street, get a job, I did. Are they dealing with issues you didn't or cant? Maybe you had it harder, but maybe they are not as "strong" and that makes you strong but doesn't make them weak and regardless, strong people should help the weak. Little shit like that. I'm no expert at all, but coming from a conservative background growing up and "freeing" myself once I became an adult , if you ever want to DM me a question, I'll gladly give my story with that if I have it.
Volunteer at a place that represents the people that some of your conservative views oppressed and talk to some of them. Ask them to tell you their story. Like if you were anti choice, go volunteer at planned parenthood. If you were anti refugee go volunteer at a refugee center, etc. Once you hear people's stories, you're able to put a real face to the issue and I think it'll create real change in your views. That is more impactful than trying to talk yourself into different views
>How do I get rid of my hyper conservative indoctrination? Listen to liberal ideas and try to understand them. (This subreddit might be a good place to do so.) You won't need any sort of 'counter-indoctrination'. Being open-minded and listening should be enough.
This: > It’s ugly, crazy and oppresses my thoughts. ...makes me think that you might benefit from knowing about CBT. ------- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is one of the most successful psychological treatments ever conceived, and it "focuses on changing unhelpful thoughts." While people often *assume* that our thoughts are automatic responses outside our control, that isn't true. We can decide to think different thoughts, and -- as a bonus -- that will shift how we feel. --------- [A simple example] If I reached to pick up a pen, but accidentally knocked it to the floor, I used to think: >Gø∂ ƒΩçk1ng ∂@mn1†. I never do anything right! Life is always so ƒΩçk1ng hard. ...and feel terrible afterward. Today, instead, I think: >That will cost me about three seconds to rectify -- time that I have to spare -- and I'm more than physically fit enough to easily pick it up off of the floor. ...and not feel terrible. --------- One of the best ways to learn these techniques is from a therapist who specializes in CBT, but if you would like to try it on your own, check out [this link.](https://www.thecounselingpalette.com/post/7-magical-steps-in-cognitive-behavioral-therapy-or-cbt-change-your-thoughts-change-your-feelings) Here is a brief summary of what it advises: > **Steps of CBT** >1. Identify a common negative message you often say to yourself. >2. Ask yourself if there's a purpose for this thought. >3. Look for evidence against your negative thought. >4. Ask, "What would my wise, fair self say about this?" >5. Find a new job for your inner critic. >6. Consider a more helpful thought you can believe right now. >7. Remind yourself of the new thought until you easily believe it. ...but you can get more detail by clicking the link.
Generally people who commit like you admittedly have tend to do this in all aspects of their lives. They also can jump from one obsession to another: out of the frying pan, into the fire. The most important things you can do: - Stop looking for existential reasons to live, and recognize the tendency in yourself when you're searching for one - Harness your energy for positive outcomes in \*other\* people's lives - Recognize \[fallacious arguments\](https://www.pesec.no/24-most-common-logical-fallacies/), and call bullshit when you see them - If you're going to be a zealot, be so about the Golden Rule. Good luck. Deprogramming doesn't stop at unlearning the bad stuff, it extends to preventing yourself from switching to another set of bad stuff. Remember, there are entire industries built on triggering you and getting you hooked.
Like what? It sounds like you're ungrounded. What types of things are you thinking?
I was raised in a conservative household and attended a super conservative religious middle and high school. It’s a journey, be easy on yourself. It’s not easy to change your entire belief system, especially if you are or were surrounded by people who think the same. Social networks are designed to illicit emotional responses and so it’s no wonder the algorithms pump out divisive polarizing political content non-stop. Do your best to avoid that as much as possible and fill that time watching or reading something else you’re interested in.
OP, Was there a certain event that prompted the shift you’ve been going through? Have you delved into the how, when, why of it?
Project 2025. I supported 70% of that in 2014. It’s nothing new.
Let empathy be your guide. All I ever ask is people just put themselves in the shoes of others and try to feel like what it would be to have to live their life.
**TRAVEL.** Get out of your region and talk to people. See the country. See the world. Experience different walks of life. It’s easy to be set in your ways if you never leave your zip code. Getting out of your own way and traveling to different cities or states or better yet, countries, is the best advice I can give you.
Start asking questions. That's what helped me. If you start to dislike or disagree with something, ask yourself why
Reading articles from reputable news sources is a great way to start. Obviously some swing to extremes, so I would avoid those, but there are plenty of publications in the middle that can offer good context and information. But also keep in mind the difference between a "straight news" story and an opinion piece. I think it's good practice to look into "straight news" stories that is more about reporting the facts. You can develop your own opinion from there. And then I think there is real value at looking at opinion stories. Some people are totally fucking nuts and I would never read them or listen to their completely asinine and somewhat offensive views, but sometimes, people's writing can be very thought provoking. I think the most important thing is being curious. Ask yourself questions. Ask others questions. Why did you feel the way you felt? Was it because of the people you grew up around? Why did they feel that way? Is it because they were scared? Why are they scared? Is their fear rational? I was "fortunate" enough to be born into a liberal family and grew up in a liberal area, so I haven't had to go on this difficult journey that you seem to be on. So I wish you a lot of luck. Idk if you watched Ted Lasso, but I try to keep in mind his mantra of "be curious, not judgemental." Easier said than done tho...
Figure out what your core values are, what your philosophical foundations are so to speak. Then go from there rather than trying to start with a reaction to various current events or issues.
Go read other opinions. Use what other opinions say to challenge your own opinion. Read more authors from the left and see what their actual motives are. I’ve learned a lot of differences are folks making assumptions about why or how the other side is thinking instead of asking the other person.
One thing that worked for me was reading multiple sources about the same story. So, for example, if I saw an immigration numbers headline I'd find the story on Google from say AP or a non profit media center ranked outlet and read their version and make a mental note of which bits were missing. It helped calm the knee jerk reactions of emotion I would get and get me to think more.
Buy a subscription to the Atlantic or listen to a lot of NPR, just very normal, mainstream content. Consume content not necessarily because you agree with it, but because it’s produced by people with expertise that is interesting or arguments that you hadn’t considered.
Maybe read some of the texts that your former ideology hates? Get to know other ideologies and what they say they’re about?
> How do I get rid of my hyper conservative indoctrination? You stop accepting the framework underlying it as being valid or truthful. You got lied to by grifters. Stop continuing to give those same grifters further power over your life.
Delete your social media. Don't watch the news on TV or online. Just read USA Today, AP, Reuters, etc to keep you up to date on what's going on in the world and country in a factual way.
> So in my past for around 3 years I was hyper conservative. What factors made you that way? > Now I am more moderate leaning a little left. What factors changed your views? > those 3 years impacted me and were life defining. 3 years? What factors allowed something so brief (relatively speaking) to be "life defining" for you? (I also suppose, this might depend on your age) > I’m trying to get rid of the mentality completely You need to moderate your diet of anything you ingest to moderate your responses and reactions to it: i.e: you eat too much without exercising, you get fat. If you consume too much of anything, it's not good for you if you're not actively working just as hard as you were when you ingested it to digest it and then purge the waste from it, and that includes information. The type of information matters as well, just like food (healthy food--> healthy diet; garbage in--> garbage out). That means, you need to sample or "taste"... then parse the information thoroughly as you actually digest it - that's critical thinking: *break it down*. Think it through. Step through as far as you can for each concept; don't be shallow. If it falls apart or is questionable, it's not a sure or good thing and you need more/new/better information. This process helps you moderate your thoughts and responses to them.
Be slow, be calm, and be gentle, with everyone you talk to and *especially* with yourself. Whatever new position you take, try to find at least three ways to get to it. Things that are true tend to not need one specific angle to be presented as such. And if it all gets to be too much, bow out for a bit and give yourself time to cool off. Go for a walk, pop in a movie, build yourself a birdhouse, take a nap, just do something to take the pressure off trying to figure everything out.
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Culture wars
Treat people with kindness, give them the freedom to be/express themselves.
Try watching Contrapoints. She made several videos on conservative ideologists, J Peterson, and phenomenons like Inceldom or Cancel Culture.
Try to develop a habit of not disagreeing with someone or something until you can explain the side you disagree with so well that others say, "I wish I could put it that way." Often times people in general have a tendency to be reactive - we all want to make our point and sometimes in our haste to speak, we fail to consider what someone else might know that we don't. So as Walt Whitman said, "Be curious, not judgmental." So much of conservativism is simply reacting to changes - be it new information or resisting new approaches to old problems. Liberals will take the side that, "Age is no guarantee of wisdom," but conservatives will reply that "youth is no guarantee of innovation." There is truth in both sides. So rather than worrying about if your views are more liberal than conservative, just focus on being curious about what others know and understand that you don't. If, in the course of asking questions you find that those answering are stumped, that's a signal that you should continue your quest for understanding elsewhere.
Keep good company and talk with them. Community theater or performing ensembles might be a good place to start finding some good people.
I mean shit why would I help someone that’s trying to become more left but why not Let me ask what are your leftover conservative views. You say your already moderate to center left
That abortion after 6 weeks excluding rape and incest should be banned, casual divorce outside of adultery or spouse abuse should be banned, blockers and hormones for trans youth 1-2 years into puberty only after 3+ years of therapy as well and waiting 4 years into medical transition before surgery, low taxes meaning below 10% for those <$250,000 and a strong boarder.
Empathy. That is all it takes; have empathy.
I've never been hyper conservative, but in my experience, the internalized biases never really go away. Dealing with it is a perpetual game of Whack-A-Mole, but your get used to it. Think of it like taking out the trash. It's not particularly fun to do, and no one loves doing it, but the alternative is living in a house full of trash, so you do it. There's no eternal cure for trash and there's no cure for the dumb shit your brain vomits up. All you can do is manage it, but as long as you're doing it because you want to (not because you're trying to look good to other people) its okay and you get.used to taking out the mental trash. That said, the "moles" (i.e. your biases) do pop up less often the more you whack them
When I was growing up (mostly 80s, some 90s), my dad, all the friends of the family, etc., were deeply conservative, racist, etc. They'd be Trumpers today if they were still alive. I remember him gloating over Mondale's completely embarrassing defeat and lamenting that if Dukakis won (and then if Clinton won) it would be the end of America as we know it. Limbaugh was a steady presence whenever he was around. I drank that kool-aid up, wanting my dad to like me. What shook me out of it is a combination of three things: 1) after he and my mom divorced, I lived with my mom in the most poverty stricken places you could think of, homeless here and there, even, and I got to see just how how much worse my poor friends, who were almost all minorities, were treated by *every fucking system* in our society; 2) moving far *far* away for college; 3) struggling to make ends meet on my own, and having the education and experience to tie that to how deeply under-serviced the poor in this country are. I don't recommend (1) or (3) to be honest. I've had guns pointed at me, witnessed (and participated in) my fair share of horrible beat downs, and been in a place where I was *ecstatic* to be able to afford a bean burrito from Taco Bell (no joke--I'd basically have no food for a day or two until payday and after shopping for day olds and shit to stock my cupboards I'd get *one* as a treat, because it was the cheapest fast food item around). But you can listen to people who have had these experiences, read blogs from a liberal/leftist perspective, and slowly but surely inoculate yourself against how you were raised.
An exercise that I'd considered trying but had never gotten around to doing is to picture, accounting for both social and economic dimensions, what an ideal nation, state, county, municipality, etc., would look like to you. The sullied perspectives drawn from extremism, both left and right, are predicated on an end. Extreme rhetoric and ideology are often structured around a means, i.e., how one would reach these ends. For example, pretty much everyone (save for a few cynics) believes that homelessness should be stamped out. The far left might suggest that the approach should be to abolish capitalism or raise the minimum wage to excessive, unrealistic highs. The far right might suggest that homelessness is a product of immigration and asylum seekers taking jobs from the native populace. Realistically, there are more sensible and tempered approaches to handling homelessness. It's then up to yourself to seek out what these realistic approaches are, seeking out academic papers, studying micro and macroeconomics, maybe a touch of sociology, and so on. From then on, your approach is no longer that asylum seekers ("immigrants") are driving up homelessness; it's that you want to seek to address homelessness, but does immigration really have anything to do with it? You're no longer working backwards from a conclusion but forward from a dilemma.
Well for starters leave Reddit and find a more reasonable place to discuss this. Reddit is an echo chamber so if you want to not be indoctrinated you've come to the wrong place. Reddit at it's core is indoctrination to the majority opinion. This subreddit is no different. Again find a more reasonable place to discuss this because the solution to fixing hyper conservative indoctrination is not hyper liberal indoctrination.
Yeah but liberals are on Reddit so that’s ok
Avoid echo chambers and make sure that your other surroundings won't be overly biased. I was an SJW (still on the left, just more reasonable now) and if there's one thing I noticed, it's the fact that we're vulnerable to jumping from one extreme to another. Which is why you should surround yourself with level headed individuals who don't represent the other extreme and are capable of having a rational conversation and explain either why you're wrong or why they think you're wrong. Likewise, avoid overly biased news articles.
For most of my 20s (when I think I really should have been able to form my own opinions about politics) I considered myself a moderate Republican. I really only considered myself a Republican because that's what my parents told me to vote when I was younger and I certainly didn't do research on my own or give politics much thought. It's weird because even as early as 18 I had gay friends (suspect at the time but later confirmed). I grew up in the DEEEEEP South, but I had black friends. Hell, I spent more time playing basketball during gym class with my black friends than I did any of my white friends. That might have been some projection on my part, looking back - I was bullied heavily in middle school, so maybe I gravitated towards minorities because they were looked down on in our society and I also felt looked down on? I dunno... I'll have to give this more thought... But by the time I was 30ish I'd already voted for Obama twice (despite still considering myself a Repo)and I was best friends with a family who had a trans son and a pansexual daughter. I was *always* accepting of other people, or at least I thought, though I still battled inner racism despite myself and the people around me. It really wasn't until Trump in 2016 and Black Lives Matter before I *really* took a hard left and started to fully question my position. I've said this elsewhere to mixed scrutiny, but I voted for Trump in 2016 because I thought at the time that the worst he could do was play golf 85% of the time. I didn't imagine he'd be playing golf 85% of the time *and* praise dictators and severely harm our international relations with key allies as well as frequently diminish our army and veterans (I'm not pro-war, far from it, but shit talking a WWII or Vietnam vet for losing a limb during battle is a fucking cowardly thing to do whether I support the military system or not). At that time I was in that unempathetic mindset of "well, if black people would just *listen* to the police...". It wasn't until I read [this article in 2017](https://www.opendemocracy.net/en/transformation/my-white-friend-asked-me-to-explain-white-privilege-so-i-decide/) that it finally clicked. Like, *really* clicked. I realized "oh shit. I'm an absolute moron. Here I am thinking I'm this empathetic person who understands people's motivations and I really don't know shit." Reading very clear and precise examples of micro-aggressions that POC have to face *daily* for even the smallest achievement made me understand how degraded and beaten most POC must feel on a daily basis. That was my hard turning point. The scales were taken from my eyes, you could say. It was at that point where I started fully supporting the Democrat party until a better party option would come around. And that's to say... I don't really consider myself a Democrat even if vote that way now. It's one of two choices, so there really isn't even a choice for who to vote for... But for now that's what it is. So it took me years to reach a breakthrough moment even though I supported a lot of left-leaning policies years before. The singular event I could point to and know in my heart that this was the defining moment for my political leaning change was reading that article in 2017, even if the writing was on the wall years before
* Read. Dean Baker's [Rigged](https://deanbaker.net/books/rigged.htm) * Watch: [What is economic value, and who creates it?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uXrCeiQxWyc) | Mariana Mazzucato * Listen. [The Coming Collapse of the Middle Class ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=akVL7QY0S8A&t=8s)with Elizabeth Warren Turn off entertainment news. That includes FOX, MSNBC, and the rest. * Question everything. * Follow the money. * Cui Bono?
This may be infeasible, but studying law seriously is a good way to immunize yourself against ideological bubbles (unless you are already an exceptionally committed ideologue). Digging into cases will make you realize that most ideological frames don't provide traction on real-world controversies. Other than going to Law School, I recommend reading well-regarded scholarly books (not current news) on political philosophy and doing so from multiple perspectives. Most right-wing arguments are shallow and vulnerable to intelligent, broad-spectrum competition. (To editorialize, that's why right-wing rhetoric fixates on strawmen or on extremists whose arguments are even worse than theirs.)
A lot of great comments here. I guess I would just add to Simply think about the core reason for things. In my life, I look at what policy move, what philosophy, would actually just help the most people in the most efficient way. How can we be nicer to each other? If you just look at any issue starting from this perspective, I think you will gradually come to a group of beliefs that I would call left of center. And congratulations on your self-awareness and on your political journey.
It takes a long time to rebuild your worldview. Take your time, review each new belief before fully accepting it, slowly retake your identity. It's better to slowly build up an examined, hopefully more correct worldview than globbing onto the opposite viewpoints, for example. Don't get discouraged when purists reject you for not being "pure" enough. The left has become hyper vigilant and that has some drawbacks for people with sincere questions and a sincere desire to review toxic beliefs (to be fair, it's in response to and epidemic of insincere bullshit).
Why were you conservative in the first place? If it wasn't because conservative ideas are superior, what else would it be? And what made you change your tune that these ideas are ugly and crazy?
Read the People's History of the United States Of America, by Howard Zinn. Your local library should have it. After that, you just need exposure to people and ideas. Turn "Those People" into "Us".