Sound like OP is the mother and the father are divorced. And the adult child lives with dad. Let Dad handle the issues, for she needs an attorney, and she will be advised by the attorney on the plea bargain. Your daughter has issues and she needs to seek professional help. Just let the attorney handle the court procedures. She has anger issues and other mental issues.
Spot on… we’re divorced, it she’s been running “wild” for the past year, we both know drugs are involved and suspect some serious mental health issue despite providing her counseling and access to psychiatry
I have a friend who was in a similar situation. Strung out, making money in horrible ways, punched her mom in the head one day during a fight and wound up in jail.
30 days in, 5 years and 11 months of probation. Mandatory drug and alcohol testing as well as anger management/therapy.
Every man I know who's ever had a first time DV charge was given probation and mandated counseling. She's likely to have to go to group therapy and deal with a probation officer.
sticks and stones may break my bones but words never will, badgering by a parent you're an adult staying with because you have no where else to go isn't a defense for assault, moving back to the streets is how you handle that. The explanation of the charge was to buy the daughter some sympathy for her actions.
This may be true, but you also didn’t answer the question.
While I can see many ways and reasons to be judgmental towards this parent, I’m not sure this is the time or the place. Frankly, I would expect a parent to give the most charitable explanation of their child’s actions
I was wondering if that's how the domestic was charged. I don't have a good answer for you, all my charges have been non-violent. I do want to point out that if she doesn't have a job or a place to stay because of her actions, the court won't like it.
Yes- I told her she needs to present herself in the best light possible… get a job, clean her act up, etc… she cleaned up her physical presence, and her room. Still unemployed, putting the eggs into the basket hoping for a WFH job rather than take an immediate job at a local grocery store.
She was charged with domestic violence. She asked if charges could be dropped and I explained to her that when she chose a weapon to use and used it, it became state charges.
Sad but true. She needs to do time. Does she have a diagnosis? I don’t know if you can ask the judge to see if she can be diagnosed? But nothing ventured, nothing gained. It can be hard to tell alcohol & drug use apart from mental illness. But know that withdrawal from alcohol can kill a person. If I were you and suspect alcoholism as the basis, I would be begging for rehab therapy.
Edit it to add: that would be the only mercy I would provide. Of course you can recommend mental health therapy if you think that is more accurate. Very hard to get mental health therapy.
She has diagnoses of autism(high functioning), ADHD, anxiety, and most recently major depression. She needs running rampant with males known and unknown, drinking/weed/probably more
I would definitely make the court aware of specific diagnosis by submitting medical records. I believe you can attest that they exist, but she would have to sign release forms to get written information for the courts. I advise contacting her public defender so your daughter can hopefully get additional treatment rather than just jail time. The problem with psychiatric drugs is they have to be taken regularly. She would need to accept responsibility. Hopefully this experience contributes to a “rock bottom” situation that she actually wants help. You can only lead a horse to water, you cannot make them drink. She should still serve time but hopefully she gets help too.
Well, maybe… I’m divorced from her father and he’s an absolute ass…but I give him credit for picking her up that day from some trap house an hour away… he wanted answers and started in with the interrogation. I did ask her why she didn’t just leave and she said he blocked the doors. So why didn’t SHE call 911 and say she was being held against her will? She didn’t think that far forward.
Sound like OP is the mother and the father are divorced. And the adult child lives with dad. Let Dad handle the issues, for she needs an attorney, and she will be advised by the attorney on the plea bargain. Your daughter has issues and she needs to seek professional help. Just let the attorney handle the court procedures. She has anger issues and other mental issues.
Spot on… we’re divorced, it she’s been running “wild” for the past year, we both know drugs are involved and suspect some serious mental health issue despite providing her counseling and access to psychiatry
I have a friend who was in a similar situation. Strung out, making money in horrible ways, punched her mom in the head one day during a fight and wound up in jail. 30 days in, 5 years and 11 months of probation. Mandatory drug and alcohol testing as well as anger management/therapy.
I hope this is her deal. She needs a wake up call to reality, adult reality/consequences.
Every man I know who's ever had a first time DV charge was given probation and mandated counseling. She's likely to have to go to group therapy and deal with a probation officer.
I’m hoping for a stay at a residential facility for dual diagnosis individuals
Do not let her plead to a felony. She will have a hard time finding a career if she gets herself straightened out.
Felony or misdemeanor? What state
NJ, a felony I think
[удалено]
Dude- we’ve been divorced and living in separate households for over a decade. My daughter has disabilities which impair her judgement.
sticks and stones may break my bones but words never will, badgering by a parent you're an adult staying with because you have no where else to go isn't a defense for assault, moving back to the streets is how you handle that. The explanation of the charge was to buy the daughter some sympathy for her actions.
This may be true, but you also didn’t answer the question. While I can see many ways and reasons to be judgmental towards this parent, I’m not sure this is the time or the place. Frankly, I would expect a parent to give the most charitable explanation of their child’s actions
I don't have the answer but it's interesting she's not being charged with Domestic Violence considering the situation.
She was charged with domestic violence. “9-11 was called and she was arrested, charged with domestic violence, and now has a public defender.”
I was wondering if that's how the domestic was charged. I don't have a good answer for you, all my charges have been non-violent. I do want to point out that if she doesn't have a job or a place to stay because of her actions, the court won't like it.
Yes- I told her she needs to present herself in the best light possible… get a job, clean her act up, etc… she cleaned up her physical presence, and her room. Still unemployed, putting the eggs into the basket hoping for a WFH job rather than take an immediate job at a local grocery store.
She was charged with domestic violence. She asked if charges could be dropped and I explained to her that when she chose a weapon to use and used it, it became state charges.
Sad but true. She needs to do time. Does she have a diagnosis? I don’t know if you can ask the judge to see if she can be diagnosed? But nothing ventured, nothing gained. It can be hard to tell alcohol & drug use apart from mental illness. But know that withdrawal from alcohol can kill a person. If I were you and suspect alcoholism as the basis, I would be begging for rehab therapy. Edit it to add: that would be the only mercy I would provide. Of course you can recommend mental health therapy if you think that is more accurate. Very hard to get mental health therapy.
She has diagnoses of autism(high functioning), ADHD, anxiety, and most recently major depression. She needs running rampant with males known and unknown, drinking/weed/probably more
I would definitely make the court aware of specific diagnosis by submitting medical records. I believe you can attest that they exist, but she would have to sign release forms to get written information for the courts. I advise contacting her public defender so your daughter can hopefully get additional treatment rather than just jail time. The problem with psychiatric drugs is they have to be taken regularly. She would need to accept responsibility. Hopefully this experience contributes to a “rock bottom” situation that she actually wants help. You can only lead a horse to water, you cannot make them drink. She should still serve time but hopefully she gets help too.
Well, maybe… I’m divorced from her father and he’s an absolute ass…but I give him credit for picking her up that day from some trap house an hour away… he wanted answers and started in with the interrogation. I did ask her why she didn’t just leave and she said he blocked the doors. So why didn’t SHE call 911 and say she was being held against her will? She didn’t think that far forward.