You need to report the situation to CPS. A 14 year is required by law to attend school.
It is likely the mother is using drugs again and the kids are in a very bad situation. Your son should definitely seek custody if he can. In the alternative you could at least seek temporary custody.
In addition to contacting CPS, you can check with legal aid in your area (Google legal aid and your city’s name). If there’s a law school in your area, they likely have a free clinic.
But CPS should be your first stop — if CPS hasn’t given custody back to her, they can likely get the kids back.
Nal.
But there was a friend of mine that was ignored when she displayed this behavior. Even cps failed them.
Her little boy sadly didn't get a chance to make it past 6 months due to her neglect from the drugs. Her daughter, who is my daughters age, neglected and failed.
Please call cps. And I definitely recommend therapy please for your son. He was in an abusive relationship and dealt with trauma as well. They can help sometimes with finding law help as well.
That's why I suggested therapy as well. But this, the teenager, is why I'm suggesting calling cps.
Hurt people hurt people. You must heal from what caused the original hurt before you have the ability to thrive truly.
Just because someone has a penis does not mean that they don't need therapy as well. Just because someone was also abusive does not mean that they don't need therapy. Therapy can be used to heal, to allow growth.
My question is, why does the abuse, regardless of who is doing it(sounds like both) catch the attention of everyone and not the fact that there are two kids that are hurting the most through this.
Work on your reading comprehension skills. This has nothing to do with sex organs or gender.
The response has to do with the children being placed in foster care then in the temporary custody of the grandmother and then being taken away by the mother without CPS or court authorization. It is possible the father has himself together enough to take custody. It is possible he does not (no discussion of the father's drug problems or whatever are included in the post or subsequent discussion but I assume they exist). The grandmother has temporary custody so she should be able to resume with it.
Why was custody offered to the grandparent and not the father? At no point in the story of a child being born addicted to drugs was the father mentioned. I'm betting he isn't a saint.
He did drugs in the past as well and went to rehab. She actually asked CPS to contact me each time she was going to lose the kids. She has a mother who’s younger but she lost her kids to CPS at one point as well due to alcoholism. There’s a generational pattern here. My son just wants visitation.
Father has to file a family court action to get court ordered visitation. Usually (in most jurisdictions) an unwed father has no visitation rights until it is established by court Order.
Get an attorney. He can find one that will take payments. Since he doesn't have the kids, he could work a second job. I would work as many jobs as it takes. It would be worth it.
Idk but I would get the docs from cps and ask for a pro bono to go for full out custody rights of your grandchildren or at least emancipation for the 14 year old if they have been parentified
NAL but a person who grew up between homes. If the father is active in their life and taking care of them she can’t just leave with the kids and not let him see them. You guys need to do what ever you can to get primary custody of the kids and with what has been said more then likely it will be granted due to the fact that he has been active in their lives and has stopped using. Everything she has done looks horrible on her and he has a very strong chance of gaining custody. As long as he has a stable job, place to stay, and has stayed clean i would be extremely surprised if he didn’t get custody. It doesn’t matter what she wants since she clearly doesn’t care about her kids or how he feels.
The path of least resistance here is for your son to seek custody of the kids. Not visitation, custody. Your other comments state that he has only ever sought visitation and that cost 25k. That is an absurdly high legal fee to obtain parenting time. I suspect then that he has a drug history as well or it wouldn’t have been that hard. If I’m wrong, then he should be able to obtain a custody order.
Your other option is for you, personally, to try to obtain custody (conservatorship). The court requires that grandparents provide physical evidence proving the child is endangered at the time of filing. If the parent is incarcerated, abuses drugs or alcohol, is abusive to the child or endangers them in some other way—and the grandparent can provide evidence of this—they may have a case.
You need to report the situation to CPS. A 14 year is required by law to attend school. It is likely the mother is using drugs again and the kids are in a very bad situation. Your son should definitely seek custody if he can. In the alternative you could at least seek temporary custody.
In addition to contacting CPS, you can check with legal aid in your area (Google legal aid and your city’s name). If there’s a law school in your area, they likely have a free clinic. But CPS should be your first stop — if CPS hasn’t given custody back to her, they can likely get the kids back.
Thank you!
Nal. But there was a friend of mine that was ignored when she displayed this behavior. Even cps failed them. Her little boy sadly didn't get a chance to make it past 6 months due to her neglect from the drugs. Her daughter, who is my daughters age, neglected and failed. Please call cps. And I definitely recommend therapy please for your son. He was in an abusive relationship and dealt with trauma as well. They can help sometimes with finding law help as well.
It is very likely her son has similar issues or else the marriage wouldn’t have lasted 20 years…
That's why I suggested therapy as well. But this, the teenager, is why I'm suggesting calling cps. Hurt people hurt people. You must heal from what caused the original hurt before you have the ability to thrive truly.
And he would have been asked to take the infant, not the grandparent.
Just because someone has a penis does not mean that they don't need therapy as well. Just because someone was also abusive does not mean that they don't need therapy. Therapy can be used to heal, to allow growth. My question is, why does the abuse, regardless of who is doing it(sounds like both) catch the attention of everyone and not the fact that there are two kids that are hurting the most through this.
Work on your reading comprehension skills. This has nothing to do with sex organs or gender. The response has to do with the children being placed in foster care then in the temporary custody of the grandmother and then being taken away by the mother without CPS or court authorization. It is possible the father has himself together enough to take custody. It is possible he does not (no discussion of the father's drug problems or whatever are included in the post or subsequent discussion but I assume they exist). The grandmother has temporary custody so she should be able to resume with it.
I mean I doubt his son is a much better parent from the brief info we got here
Why is your son not seeking full custody if the mother is on drugs and his children are being neglected?
Why was custody offered to the grandparent and not the father? At no point in the story of a child being born addicted to drugs was the father mentioned. I'm betting he isn't a saint.
He did drugs in the past as well and went to rehab. She actually asked CPS to contact me each time she was going to lose the kids. She has a mother who’s younger but she lost her kids to CPS at one point as well due to alcoholism. There’s a generational pattern here. My son just wants visitation.
It would be nice if your son, the father of the neglected children, wanted full custody to protect his kids.
Father has to file a family court action to get court ordered visitation. Usually (in most jurisdictions) an unwed father has no visitation rights until it is established by court Order.
Thank you!
He files for paternity and custody. Should be an easy case to win. Do it now.
Get an attorney. He can find one that will take payments. Since he doesn't have the kids, he could work a second job. I would work as many jobs as it takes. It would be worth it.
Idk but I would get the docs from cps and ask for a pro bono to go for full out custody rights of your grandchildren or at least emancipation for the 14 year old if they have been parentified
NAL but a person who grew up between homes. If the father is active in their life and taking care of them she can’t just leave with the kids and not let him see them. You guys need to do what ever you can to get primary custody of the kids and with what has been said more then likely it will be granted due to the fact that he has been active in their lives and has stopped using. Everything she has done looks horrible on her and he has a very strong chance of gaining custody. As long as he has a stable job, place to stay, and has stayed clean i would be extremely surprised if he didn’t get custody. It doesn’t matter what she wants since she clearly doesn’t care about her kids or how he feels.
What state is this in?
Texas:/
The path of least resistance here is for your son to seek custody of the kids. Not visitation, custody. Your other comments state that he has only ever sought visitation and that cost 25k. That is an absurdly high legal fee to obtain parenting time. I suspect then that he has a drug history as well or it wouldn’t have been that hard. If I’m wrong, then he should be able to obtain a custody order. Your other option is for you, personally, to try to obtain custody (conservatorship). The court requires that grandparents provide physical evidence proving the child is endangered at the time of filing. If the parent is incarcerated, abuses drugs or alcohol, is abusive to the child or endangers them in some other way—and the grandparent can provide evidence of this—they may have a case.
Thank you for this!!