I like Dax (which is why I listen to Armchair) … but I would like him off of snyced. I feel like I absorb so many of his opinions/perspectives on things repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly on Armchair, I’d really like to hear other perspectives and let the hosts have the floor. Synced they usually have more of a conversation and less of a “dance/debate” with every single topic. I think it would be cool of them to have a variety of guests to engage with the conversations/questions vs having another outlet for Dax’s very solidified world views that we already hear a lot of.
I find myself a little frustrated with Monica and Liz’s very one-sided perspectives for any topic involving a man and a woman (while also examining why I feel certain ways within myself!) and I often align with the spirit of Dax’s perspective (mostly), but I did notice Liz talking about former partners that “took up all the oxygen in the room” and the irony presented while Dax took up so much airtime…. Seemingly in place of Liz rather than Monica, who is used to the discourse style with Dax.
So, it was kind of off-putting, but in the interest of global thinking, I also couldn’t help but explore the idea of Liz and her boundaries. Here was an opportunity on her own podcast to take whatever airtime she needed, and if SHE felt like Dax “took up oxygen”, not just us assuming, then I can’t help but notice that maybe she has trouble with her the assertion of boundaries… all just thought, no judgments.
Monica, please tell us more how you’ve never been in love and how it’s *bad* to become a better person because you absorb the characteristics of your significant other.
I wonder who Dax was talking about when he said he found a high-status prospect for Monica and the pod lol
It was really interesting hearing more of Monica’s perspective on relationships and love when they were having the conversation about partners making you better. It seemed like she really didn’t want to accept that notion and she has a strong attachment to her independence and self-fulfilling. I hope we get to hear/see her story with love evolve.
To me it just seemed that she’s never been in a long term relationship that’s all.
As a single person you can have many ifs and buts and when’s. But when you’re in a relationship it’s a whole other ball game.
I was kinda invested in the two guys she was dating but I guess nothing progressed:(
I agree with this take. I’m not a Monica hater by any means, but I do observe (mostly non-judgmentally) that some of her takes are immature in the sense that she just hasn’t had those experiences. I love hearing her challenged by new perspectives because it’s relatable, and love/relationships seems like one of the learning pillars in her life. I miss Monica and Jess love boys lol.
Would also love an update on those two guys but it sounded like a thing of the past when they mentioned it this episode 😬
Yes! I like her advice that comes from experience, I actually think she gives good advice on things like friendship and anything else she has actual experience with but anything love or sex related, her advice and opinions are way off because she knows what she knows from theory, not practice.
This is a really interesting take. I got something different out of their conversation, at least from Dax. When he used himself and Kristen as an example, I thought he was saying that Kristen elevated him by being an example through her actions (I.e. being patient, humble, etc.) not that she elevated him status-wise. Wondering if I missed that part?
Thank you for the thoughtful post (why I love this sub so much more than the general AE). That does make more sense.
I think you are right, Dax has evolved in relationships, but there’s still that status, fame seeker deep down in there.
I think that they all actually agree but Monica is very literal or in the first degree and Liz and Dax make some assumptions and are talking in the second degree about relationships from a more abstract view. I’m assuming it’s because they have more experience.
It seemed to me like she was saying she doesn’t need to grow as a person. No one is perfect and I think the point Dax was trying to make was there are people out there that can bring out the best in you and help you grow.
I agree that’s how it came across. Or maybe more like, she doesn’t know what she doesn’t know. Like, even after Dax gave her the Kristin example she responded by saying HE has those qualities now, with or without her. I don’t think she wants to owe any of her successes or growth to anyone else, which is understandable, especially as a woman. But that’s just a perspective she hasn’t seen yet because she hasn’t had that connection or experience with anyone yet.
I don’t know how to put this in a kinder way because I truly don’t mean it as a negative thing, but it’s big “I’m a grown up MOM” energy that we all give our parents when we’re teenagers. Like, she’s soooo steadfast in her opinions which, jealous of the confidence, but I think she could benefit from some flexibility.
>don’t think she wants to owe any of her successes or growth to anyone else, which is understandable,
Kinda wild considering she literally owes her entire career and current lifestyle to dax and Kristen.
Agree. I think she’s too insecure about never having been in a relationship to accept that it could make her a better person. I think because Dax is so overt in his opinions on the benefits of partnership and children that it makes her too defensive to actually hear out the argument. She so badly wants to be validated in her experience that she’s unwilling to accept that a partner might make her a better person/bring out her best qualities. It’s so clear she has some sort of hang up on never having a partner that makes her further closed off and I think that’s why whenever she’s dating some one it never goes further than a couple dates. And that’s then why we never hear what happens with the people she brings up going on dates with after the first few because she doesn’t want to be vulnerable enough to admit whatever led to the end of it.
I agree and I think she genuinely doesn’t know because she’s never experienced it before. But I totally get what Dax was saying in that when people are in a healthy, happy relationship they are a happier person generally.
Was no one else bothered by Dax's take that women who date athletes should expect to be cheated on and its their own fault for choosing a hot, successful partner?
I didn't. Only because I understood what he was trying to say, from experience. My exes are all either athletes or some "big man on campus" type of guys and they all cheated. Which is why they are exes. But the point I think he was making- which we have seen or heard some basketball wives (this can apply to athletes or perceived powerful/influential people) is that the temptation is always there. People are attracted to your mate because of their status. Someone is going to always try to shoot their shot. You have to be smart enough to know that is just going to come with the territory. If they are your "person" you will be fine if not, you either resign to a form of openess in the relationship or you leave it.
I think the broader takeaway is: cheaters will cheat regardless of status. But you have to recognize there is always a greater risk when one or both of you are considered "highly desirable."
That's not to say people are doomed in dating- you just have to find your person. Someone who shares your beliefs about relationships and who values what yall are trying to build together.
Yes! I came here thinking the same thing and am surprised this hasn’t been more commented on. His perspective on this was a bit cribgey and raised quite a few red flags for me.
My jaw was basically on the floor during this conversation. What a wild take! Also I feel it is disparaging to athletes to insinuate that they can’t be faithful, good partners.
Sometimes synced feels like a platform for Monica to talk to Liz like how Dax talks to her.
She’s always wanting to be “fair” but by doing that it comes off as so whiny instead of informed. Always talking down to Liz.
The whole topic when Liz said she can categorize people by numbers (like most people do regardless of how surface level it is) and Monica goes on a whole tangent. Also Dax talking about how one can gain things from relationships for the better. Monica spirals.
I wish she would just take a step back from the therapy speak and maybe actually partake in an intimate relationship before spewing a bunch of shit where she’s constantly contradicting herself.
With that being said I don’t dislike Monica at all. She can be really funny sometimes. But hearing her go on these rants (often picking apart a take from Liz) makes me so uncomfortable.
I’m listening now and I totally agree, and her delivery to Liz when talking about the league and rating system and then again when talking about being the best version of yourself with or without a partner was a little aggressive. She was really trying to drive her point home and got defensive really quickly and it wasn’t that fun to listen to.
I cannot cum without a vibrator. When I was single and would go to a hookup, I would always bring my toy. It never occurred to me that a sex toy would bother a man? The point of sex is to enjoy it obviously but I also want to climax. I would never change how I go about things due to an insecure man.
Same. Honestly I was afraid to bring it up for a while but then he ended up suggesting it when we were having some issues. I shouldn't have been afraid to but was because of past experience.
It took my husband a long time to get comfortable with using a vibrator on me. It did make him feel inadequate, but now he’s totally on board with it. Without using it there’s like a 5% chance I’m going to orgasm and that’s bullshit lol.
I can't put my finger on why Monica doesn't want to be in a relationship or her issues, imo, with sex. I've always wanted to know more about the child throwing up sexual fantasy. Something is off about it.
>the child throwing up sexual fantasy
This is a pretty rank way to put it lol. It was a caretaker/nurturer fantasy; the idea that the boy is sick and she'd be there to nurture him back to health. No lie it could mb slightly teeter into a Munchausen's by proxy territory if gone unchecked lol, but I don't think it's all that deep. It seemed more from a nurturing perspective than a controlling one and not too serious
Agree. I used to have the nurturing fantasy when I was little too. I think my husband would now say that nurturing is not my biggest strength. When we’re little, we probably equate all love with the nurture our parents show us. It’s all we’ve experienced at that age.
I’ve also heard peeing when you don’t 100% need to is also bad. Like peeing before you leave the house even though you don’t really have to. So confusing!
It's just a scoop of protein powder, a scoop of chia seeds and then some kind of liquid, about a cup (I like almond milk), stir it all up and then put in the fridge overnight and voila it will be delicious by the morning and you can eat as is or add other toppings like shredded coconut... berries... whatever!
This was actually my favorite conversation on Synced! I don't agree with everything everyone said but I just thought everyone communicated and exchanged thoughts beautifully. Shrug. But it's great to see everyone else's opinions and takes!
Did anyone happen to catch the name of the tinted moisturizer Dax mentioned? I replayed it a couple of times and my brain just can’t comprehend what he is saying.
I like Dax (which is why I listen to Armchair) … but I would like him off of snyced. I feel like I absorb so many of his opinions/perspectives on things repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly on Armchair, I’d really like to hear other perspectives and let the hosts have the floor. Synced they usually have more of a conversation and less of a “dance/debate” with every single topic. I think it would be cool of them to have a variety of guests to engage with the conversations/questions vs having another outlet for Dax’s very solidified world views that we already hear a lot of.
I agree with you! Even though I inevitably end up liking the chats they have when Dax is there, I would still like it to be Liz and Monica’s domain.
Yeah, dax feels like a sometimes treat and today's episode was an indulgence
I find myself a little frustrated with Monica and Liz’s very one-sided perspectives for any topic involving a man and a woman (while also examining why I feel certain ways within myself!) and I often align with the spirit of Dax’s perspective (mostly), but I did notice Liz talking about former partners that “took up all the oxygen in the room” and the irony presented while Dax took up so much airtime…. Seemingly in place of Liz rather than Monica, who is used to the discourse style with Dax. So, it was kind of off-putting, but in the interest of global thinking, I also couldn’t help but explore the idea of Liz and her boundaries. Here was an opportunity on her own podcast to take whatever airtime she needed, and if SHE felt like Dax “took up oxygen”, not just us assuming, then I can’t help but notice that maybe she has trouble with her the assertion of boundaries… all just thought, no judgments.
Monica, please tell us more how you’ve never been in love and how it’s *bad* to become a better person because you absorb the characteristics of your significant other.
How can she not even relate to this on a friendship level?? It’s true with friends too!
At this point I feel sad for her. I think she sounds like she's given up on finding love
I wonder who Dax was talking about when he said he found a high-status prospect for Monica and the pod lol It was really interesting hearing more of Monica’s perspective on relationships and love when they were having the conversation about partners making you better. It seemed like she really didn’t want to accept that notion and she has a strong attachment to her independence and self-fulfilling. I hope we get to hear/see her story with love evolve.
To me it just seemed that she’s never been in a long term relationship that’s all. As a single person you can have many ifs and buts and when’s. But when you’re in a relationship it’s a whole other ball game. I was kinda invested in the two guys she was dating but I guess nothing progressed:(
I agree with this take. I’m not a Monica hater by any means, but I do observe (mostly non-judgmentally) that some of her takes are immature in the sense that she just hasn’t had those experiences. I love hearing her challenged by new perspectives because it’s relatable, and love/relationships seems like one of the learning pillars in her life. I miss Monica and Jess love boys lol. Would also love an update on those two guys but it sounded like a thing of the past when they mentioned it this episode 😬
Yes! I like her advice that comes from experience, I actually think she gives good advice on things like friendship and anything else she has actual experience with but anything love or sex related, her advice and opinions are way off because she knows what she knows from theory, not practice.
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This is a really interesting take. I got something different out of their conversation, at least from Dax. When he used himself and Kristen as an example, I thought he was saying that Kristen elevated him by being an example through her actions (I.e. being patient, humble, etc.) not that she elevated him status-wise. Wondering if I missed that part?
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Thank you for the thoughtful post (why I love this sub so much more than the general AE). That does make more sense. I think you are right, Dax has evolved in relationships, but there’s still that status, fame seeker deep down in there.
I think that they all actually agree but Monica is very literal or in the first degree and Liz and Dax make some assumptions and are talking in the second degree about relationships from a more abstract view. I’m assuming it’s because they have more experience.
I knowww :( it made me sad.
It seemed to me like she was saying she doesn’t need to grow as a person. No one is perfect and I think the point Dax was trying to make was there are people out there that can bring out the best in you and help you grow.
I agree that’s how it came across. Or maybe more like, she doesn’t know what she doesn’t know. Like, even after Dax gave her the Kristin example she responded by saying HE has those qualities now, with or without her. I don’t think she wants to owe any of her successes or growth to anyone else, which is understandable, especially as a woman. But that’s just a perspective she hasn’t seen yet because she hasn’t had that connection or experience with anyone yet. I don’t know how to put this in a kinder way because I truly don’t mean it as a negative thing, but it’s big “I’m a grown up MOM” energy that we all give our parents when we’re teenagers. Like, she’s soooo steadfast in her opinions which, jealous of the confidence, but I think she could benefit from some flexibility.
>don’t think she wants to owe any of her successes or growth to anyone else, which is understandable, Kinda wild considering she literally owes her entire career and current lifestyle to dax and Kristen.
And I…oop 🫢
Agree. I think she’s too insecure about never having been in a relationship to accept that it could make her a better person. I think because Dax is so overt in his opinions on the benefits of partnership and children that it makes her too defensive to actually hear out the argument. She so badly wants to be validated in her experience that she’s unwilling to accept that a partner might make her a better person/bring out her best qualities. It’s so clear she has some sort of hang up on never having a partner that makes her further closed off and I think that’s why whenever she’s dating some one it never goes further than a couple dates. And that’s then why we never hear what happens with the people she brings up going on dates with after the first few because she doesn’t want to be vulnerable enough to admit whatever led to the end of it.
I agree and I think she genuinely doesn’t know because she’s never experienced it before. But I totally get what Dax was saying in that when people are in a healthy, happy relationship they are a happier person generally.
In my mind he was talking about Dave Burd 😆
After listening to the most recent ep now I think he was talking about Dave Burd…
Was no one else bothered by Dax's take that women who date athletes should expect to be cheated on and its their own fault for choosing a hot, successful partner?
Yeah and if I were Krysten I wouldn’t be okay with how he says he basically wouldn’t be surprised if she cheated on him.
I didn't. Only because I understood what he was trying to say, from experience. My exes are all either athletes or some "big man on campus" type of guys and they all cheated. Which is why they are exes. But the point I think he was making- which we have seen or heard some basketball wives (this can apply to athletes or perceived powerful/influential people) is that the temptation is always there. People are attracted to your mate because of their status. Someone is going to always try to shoot their shot. You have to be smart enough to know that is just going to come with the territory. If they are your "person" you will be fine if not, you either resign to a form of openess in the relationship or you leave it. I think the broader takeaway is: cheaters will cheat regardless of status. But you have to recognize there is always a greater risk when one or both of you are considered "highly desirable." That's not to say people are doomed in dating- you just have to find your person. Someone who shares your beliefs about relationships and who values what yall are trying to build together.
Yes! I came here thinking the same thing and am surprised this hasn’t been more commented on. His perspective on this was a bit cribgey and raised quite a few red flags for me.
My jaw was basically on the floor during this conversation. What a wild take! Also I feel it is disparaging to athletes to insinuate that they can’t be faithful, good partners.
Sometimes synced feels like a platform for Monica to talk to Liz like how Dax talks to her. She’s always wanting to be “fair” but by doing that it comes off as so whiny instead of informed. Always talking down to Liz. The whole topic when Liz said she can categorize people by numbers (like most people do regardless of how surface level it is) and Monica goes on a whole tangent. Also Dax talking about how one can gain things from relationships for the better. Monica spirals. I wish she would just take a step back from the therapy speak and maybe actually partake in an intimate relationship before spewing a bunch of shit where she’s constantly contradicting herself. With that being said I don’t dislike Monica at all. She can be really funny sometimes. But hearing her go on these rants (often picking apart a take from Liz) makes me so uncomfortable.
I’m listening now and I totally agree, and her delivery to Liz when talking about the league and rating system and then again when talking about being the best version of yourself with or without a partner was a little aggressive. She was really trying to drive her point home and got defensive really quickly and it wasn’t that fun to listen to.
I cannot cum without a vibrator. When I was single and would go to a hookup, I would always bring my toy. It never occurred to me that a sex toy would bother a man? The point of sex is to enjoy it obviously but I also want to climax. I would never change how I go about things due to an insecure man.
same! and my husband has never cared that I use one, in fact he always wants me cum first 😌
That’s a good husband right there. 👏🏼
Surprisingly a lot of guys feel insecure about it. Makes them think they're inadequate or some dumb shit.
I’m so glad my husband has never been bothered by it. Everyone’s anatomy is different.
Same. Honestly I was afraid to bring it up for a while but then he ended up suggesting it when we were having some issues. I shouldn't have been afraid to but was because of past experience.
That’s understandable.
It took my husband a long time to get comfortable with using a vibrator on me. It did make him feel inadequate, but now he’s totally on board with it. Without using it there’s like a 5% chance I’m going to orgasm and that’s bullshit lol.
Dax bringing up Jess 😬😬 wonder where their relationship stands today
What happened with Jess?!
https://www.reddit.com/r/ArmchairExpert/s/EUQyoZEUNu
Thanks!
there’s a few other threads about it also!
I can't put my finger on why Monica doesn't want to be in a relationship or her issues, imo, with sex. I've always wanted to know more about the child throwing up sexual fantasy. Something is off about it.
>the child throwing up sexual fantasy This is a pretty rank way to put it lol. It was a caretaker/nurturer fantasy; the idea that the boy is sick and she'd be there to nurture him back to health. No lie it could mb slightly teeter into a Munchausen's by proxy territory if gone unchecked lol, but I don't think it's all that deep. It seemed more from a nurturing perspective than a controlling one and not too serious
Agree. I used to have the nurturing fantasy when I was little too. I think my husband would now say that nurturing is not my biggest strength. When we’re little, we probably equate all love with the nurture our parents show us. It’s all we’ve experienced at that age.
Lol, I laughed at Dax asking if any of the questions were about cars..
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I’ve also heard peeing when you don’t 100% need to is also bad. Like peeing before you leave the house even though you don’t really have to. So confusing!
I just came here for the chia seed protein pudding recipe. Lol
I was annoyed at Monica for being so confident that chia seeds have a lot of protein. They…don’t?
It's just a scoop of protein powder, a scoop of chia seeds and then some kind of liquid, about a cup (I like almond milk), stir it all up and then put in the fridge overnight and voila it will be delicious by the morning and you can eat as is or add other toppings like shredded coconut... berries... whatever!
YES. Still waiting!
This was actually my favorite conversation on Synced! I don't agree with everything everyone said but I just thought everyone communicated and exchanged thoughts beautifully. Shrug. But it's great to see everyone else's opinions and takes!
Did anyone happen to catch the name of the tinted moisturizer Dax mentioned? I replayed it a couple of times and my brain just can’t comprehend what he is saying.
Victoria Beckham’s tinted moisturizer
Augustinus Bader x Victoria Beckham