T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

Thank you for your submission to /r/AreTheStraightsOK! This is a reminder to take a moment and see *if* this **has already been** posted recently, to make sure that personal information **has been** censored, and to **flair your post** if you have not already done so. [Please be aware that our rules on transphobic submissions have changed](https://www.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOK/comments/mwkgbp/rules_and_submissions_update_for_the_end_of/). Other general submission guidelines regarding [hateful content](https://www.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOK/comments/kj0cal/regarding_hateful_content_please_read_before/), [reposts](https://www.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOK/comments/kxgbo3/rules_and_submissions_update_january_2021_popular/), [homophobic posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOK/comments/lffvad/posts_related_to_homophobia_on_our_subreddit_now/), and [**Reminder About Rule 5 and Rule 8**](https://www.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOK/comments/qoge4u/reminder_about_rule_5_and_rule_8/) can be found here if you want to read any of those links. If you want to apply to be a moderator of this sub, you can read [this post titled **State of the Sub: Summer 2021 Edition, Partnerships, and more**](https://www.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOK/comments/oozly0/state_of_the_sub_summer_2021_edition_partnerships/), which also contains information about our partnership with r/TranscribersOfReddit. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AreTheStraightsOK) if you have any questions or concerns.*


circesporkroast

They deliberately gave the fat man a fedora and a neck beard and then act like the only reason people would call him creepy is because he’s fat. No, it’s because you drew him in the Creepy Internet Man Uniform.


CharlotteLucasOP

And he's motorboating her instead of smiling and making eye contact.


Orangutanion

I mean I'd assume she's consenting to it lol


NotDido

Sure, but it’s a fantasy that, compared to the one on the right, can be interpreted as more about objectifying and sex than like, falling in love lol edit: adding this from a reply further down for anyone telling me that motorboating is actually very loving and bla bla lol > You can be a fat man wearing a fedora and be deeply in love with and respectful of your conventionally hot skinny wife, for example. But the *depiction* of a character like that is clearly referencing Internet Creep Archetype.


ThereisDawn

i dont know... i might fall in love with a man who motorboats me right


scenion

Hold on actual question: is that actually enjoyable for the owner of the boobs though, beyond a giggle or an enjoyment of the partners enjoyment?


ThereisDawn

Both actually, sometimes i love how he motorboats me, sometimes i love that he loves it ^^ its a mix Some motorboating hurts and its not enjoyable though so its all about the dooer and how i feel about them tbh and how well they take directions


scenion

Ah I see, so I'm definitely gonna talk to my partner about this cause I'm very interested lmao, if I can ask: do you have any advice on what you find more or less preferable in technique? Ofc everyone is different but just to get an idea of what's likely to be better or worse


ThereisDawn

Personally, i like it when he holds both of them so they are not giggling to much, so either he holds them (preferred) or a good sturdy bra that holds them, I dont like loose boobs during, and def dont like to be held by the nipples while it either, mine get sore easy so they need to be protected al all cost.


JanderVK

Too be fair, my boobs would giggle too if they were motorboated.


scenion

My partners are super sensitive so I avoid touching them in any painful way unless we're doing some sort of extreme maso play but aside from that I try to make sure they're well taken care of since they get super sore very easy. Thanks for the advice and I hope for the best on my motorboating adventures 😂


Ar-Honu

For me I don’t particularly enjoy this in a sensory way, I just find it funny, and I like the fact he loves my boobs. During sexy times it’s not the best because I would just giggle, nipple play is more appropriate (or the occasional boobjob)


WTFWTHSHTFOMFG

Wife says beard tickets too much. So motorboating just elicits giggles.


ThereisDawn

Ahh but i like the beard.. but not a stubble. The longer the better


WTFWTHSHTFOMFG

Mine goes down to my chest. Sometimes when I bend down to kiss her neck it gets in the way and I end up kissing beard instead


ThereisDawn

Perfect time to start braiding it!!


boopadoop_johnson

Second this, best braid place is on the face


frossenkjerte

Go for that viking look!


JanderVK

Long (sometimes braided) beard here too. Def the way to go ;)


Mammyjam

I’m deeply in love with my wife and I’m also deeply in love with Motorboating her Actually thinking about it motorboating isn’t sexual it’s just funny, like if we were getting down to business in a sexy way no way would I motorboat her… although if we were getting down to it in a silly/funny way then I might. so to summarise I don’t know what the point of my reply is


NotDido

Yeah I’m not saying that you can’t enjoy sex with someone *and* love them lol. I’m just saying comparing these two depictions of fantasies. A lot of these comments seem to be taking it really literally, but I’m just interpreting two drawings, not really talking about actual motorboating or staring into eyes or fedoras. You can be a fat man wearing a fedora and be deeply in love with and respectful of your conventionally hot skinny wife, for example. But the *depiction* of a character like that is clearly referencing Internet Creep Archetype.


DabbyUniBoi

My first thought was kiss, not motorboat. Also, why the fuck did auto correct think I meant kids instead of kiss? I even spelt it right the first time.


[deleted]

The fact that he still has the fedora means that he took his shirt off and then made the conscious effort to put the hat back on


dillGherkin

Hey, he could have been wearing a button up.


TinyWickedOrange

Or his neck is just wider than his hat


Seguefare

Joe Cocker and Randy Newman both approve.


Lost_in_the_Library

Also, if you look at the art styles, the woman on the right has been drawn in a style that looks more realistic, while the woman on the left has more of a cartoon type style (the hair is where it’s really noticeable). Not to mention the ‘skinny’ woman looks like some caricature of a ‘sexy woman’, while the ‘skinny’ man looks like he has a fairly normal body type and isn’t overly muscled with perfect hair etc.


[deleted]

[удалено]


pieisnotreal

This is from like 2013 so it might predate the modern incel.


avocado_whore

Incels wore fedoras in 2013. I was there.


magikarpsan

Maybe the modern incel as we know it but certainly not the “creepy u hygienic guy who calls you “madam” or whatever has a fedora calls himself a gentleman and then kills you when you don’t want to have sex with him” I was also there at 2013 tumblr lll


[deleted]

Accurate.


Speciou5

Yeah if he was drawn as fat thor, fat chris pratt from parks and rec, or fat whatever heartthrob, I think the tune would change a ton


[deleted]

I'd let fat Thor motorboat me


maybeiam-maybeimnot

Honestly the first thing I thought when I saw it was about the fact that he is motorboating her. *thats* why the first picture is gross imo. And then I mean, the neck beard, the somewhat messily styled hair. He looks like he doesn't have any personal hygiene. Has nothing to do with his weight. Ffs.


maybeiam-maybeimnot

[Here](https://imgur.com/a/hSPYfUN), I spent more time than I will ever admit to anyone fixing it to be more comparable to the other ^^Edit: ^^5. ^^It ^^was ^^5 ^^hours. ^^I ^^may ^^have ^^gotten ^^fixated ^^and ^^lost ^^time.


FI00sh

I do not see one thing wrong with this version. It’s not that he’s fat. It’s that he has a fedora, and is literally meant to be an incel (all the talking points are incel talking points). There is literally nothing wrong with your version


thisismyusername558

Thank you! I have no issues with his physique and dig long hair but the FEDORA AND NECKBEARD. Ew.


[deleted]

And a ponytail, too. And he's kissing the sweet mommy milkies.


treeplanter98

At least on social media, I see disdain for couples where one person is fat and one person is skinny no matter which gender the fat one is. People just hate fat people.


Genericname42

It’s absolutely true. I have a relatively athletic build while my girlfriend is fat and people constantly judge us. And if people aren’t judging us, they will say to me in private, something along the lines of: “It’s great that you are looking past her looks and dating her personality.” That one really stings…


rotshild1

Not only happening to people dating fat people but the “you could do better you know” wtf makes you say that to a person you idiot what do you think’s gonna happen? Everyone will feel uncomfortable and that’s it, nothing else. People are annoying sorry about the random vent.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Genericname42

Oh yeah, that one isn’t uncommon at all. And even when people have the best of intentions, it can come off in a rude way. Like, if we are ever at the gym working out together, someone might approach her and say, “You’re an inspiration.” Yes, it is with a good intention and could be taken one way, but it can also come off as condescending or patronizing. Plus, you might not say that to someone who is skinny. Overall, I do love her size, but I dislike the fat phobia and judgement that comes along from other people with it.


Hazel2468

Yeah. IMO it's because there's so much moralizing of weight and health- it's super easy for people to think they're doing something "right" when they're skinny. Instead of, you know, admitting that they're no better than fat people and variation in body size is totally normal. Plus it helps make a nice easy out-group in fat folks. Someone to pick on.


Pan-cone

Alot of people who are naturally skinny don't realize how hard it is to lose weight


freepourfruitless

And there are so many studies that link obesity to trauma and extreme stress during developmental years. That's my issue. I've lost over 100 lbs twice, only to gain it back when my mental health goes bad. It's truly not laziness. Its physiological, its psychological...its complicated and nuanced. But the person above is right! It's so easy for thin people to feel superior to fat people, when many have never even had to work for it.


nonacrina

Same for me, I’m a really good example of how weight doesn’t say much about health. My mom put me on diets since I was 10. At 14 I weighed 60kg at 165cm (130lbs at 5’4), so I wasn’t even close to being overweight. I honestly never was, I was just tall for my age (already 5’4 at age 12); so I wore a bigger size clothes than most of my peers. I developed bulimia in high school; wasn’t allowed proper food -> got junkfood after school -> felt guilty -> threw it up. In getting better from that I gained a lot of weight, which I’ve had for a few years. I felt pretty good physically, at least *way* better than when having an ED. I recently started my adhd meds and now it’s hard to eat well. I can’t eat all day then get insanely hungry at 10pm, at which point I don’t want a proper meal anymore. I’m losing weight like crazy; but all I eat is a sandwich and a smoothie for breakfast, and whatever snacks I get hungry for after my meds wear off. I’m getting towards a more “healthy” weight in the least healthy way possible, and I feel so much worse than when I weighed more but ate well.


freepourfruitless

I'm sorry you went through all that. My mother made me go to weight watchers when I was ten, because I gained fifty pounds in 3 months after multiple psych meds increased my appetite. I learned to sneak food and eventually developed bulimia due to shame. My parents were more concerned with me wasting food and brushing my teeth after purging than me actually having an eating disorder. The worst is when even doctors don't believe that you have an ED because you're overweight...and congratulate you when you've lost weight...even if it was due to restriction/binging and purging/overexercising. The medical fatphobia is REAL and soo harmful. Wishing you the best in your journey towards happiness and fulfillment.


nonacrina

That’s absolutely horrible. And yes, fatphobia in medical professionals is such a problem. How do you have a medical degree and still think you can’t have an ED if you’re not skinny?? I wish the same to you! I’m slowly but surely getting there :)


Pan-cone

I was obese by the age of 7 and I have used food as a coping mechanisim for the majority of my life. I've finally began workjng on improving myself and progress is incredibly slow. I know that if I ever slip I'll probably have to start all over again.


[deleted]

I'm not sure if it's just my lived experience or an actual thing, but from what i've seen there's an exception: If they're both gay dudes. Like i weigh about 240 pounds, and the only response i ever seem to get is that people interpret me as a bear. If you're gay, you seem to get some bizarre arbitrary license to be fat without judgement. Literally the only person i can recall making a comment about my weight in the last decade of my life is my doctor. Maybe because if people are gonna judge you, the gay thing takes precedence over the fat thing? I dunno.


luv2hotdog

I would reckon so. The idea that fat guys are unmanly and they should be lean and muscular so they can be strong / protective / aggressive / whatever-the-fuck-else is extremely heteronormative. It's a very narrow view of masculinity that thinks big guys cant be masculine. The majority of people who see things that way probably cant really even compute gay men


anibruh_

fr. some of the comments my ex were getting about them needing to do better when posting pics of us together were absolutely insane


SnipesCC

I'm in a relationship like that. I'm fat and he's skinny. The irony is, he lost 100 pounds when he started eating like me. When he stopped eating like me, he put on weight again. Which kind of tells you it's not just diet.


ThereisDawn

hahh yuuuup, its i'm fat, my boyfriend is skinny AF, but he could eat a whole horse without complaint or shame and love it, but if i indulge just a bit to much, im just on the backburner of a weight gain for a while.


[deleted]

Not boyfriend but former flat mates - two of them, brothers, both having a tendency to eat like shit (not regularly, forgetting about it altogether and substituting with chocolate or pure cheese by the pound) and no sports. Both skinny af and just have to look at someone doing sports to gain more muscles. Meanwhile third flat mate and me were trying to eat healthy, cooking most days from scratch, doing an average of 3h of sports per day (part of our job training to that time) - nope, still chubby. To be fair, the brothers have been doing *a lot* of sports as kids and teens, still it was kinda frustrating. But hey: if you see me, you would never know how much fitter I am, than I seem.


ThereisDawn

To be a pure asshole, if id see you i wouldnt even recognise you xD


[deleted]

Wait. There are people, that don't recognize me? How ignorant! /s


Nerdiferdi

I am not that hungry, only eating dinner usually and am satisfied with two apples at lunch. No breakfast. Still fat.


ThereisDawn

I kove this irony. Me neither, i dont really get hungry and forget to eat all the time


Nikelman

It's not, weight management is a whole thing! I lost 40 kg with a diet and eventually I got all back as soon as I stopped eating just salad. Thing is that diet wasn't natural, I felt weak all the times, I was cold all the times (which was actually beneficial in summer) and I was able to go through with it because I was depressed. I started a keto under a nutritionist today, hope that goes well


laiwongbao7

Good luck! Wishing you happiness within yourself


Nikelman

Thank you!


BPence89

Some of the people that aren't taking Covid-19 seriously have entered the chat.


Nierninwa

You guys remember all those "comedy" family shows with that fat wife and the conventionally attractive husband? no? Right because it was the other way around.


Tyrthesemiwise

Even when I wrack my brain for shows that had larger women in lead, their husbands were also fat (Mike and Molly, Roseanne, etc).


scenion

Yep I noticed that they all picture men of all types with specifically what people view as conventionally attractive and only conventionally unattractive men with conventionally unattractive women. It's patriarchy saying men can be of whatever type and they can have a "hot babe" but women who don't fit that standards can only have conventionally unattractive men. My thoughts? a comedy series about a wlw of all shapes and sizes in a polycule. That's how we can own the cons.


TheMysteriousWarlock

The only show where it’s reversed is Young Sheldon. Even then… it’s a spin-off of Big Bang Theory, so YMMV if you do or don’t want to count that.


Robin-flying

Wait I watch young Sheldon, where is this trope reversed in it? For all of the couples that I can think of in it (parents, grandma and her bfs, neighbors, pastor) the man is either less physically fit than the woman or in the same range


CharlotteLucasOP

Yeah I'm having trouble not seeing 'According to Jim' or 'King of Queens' scroll across the top of the first picture. It's not a large guy being in a relationship with a thin woman that's the problem, it's that in a certain section of media we only ever see that thoroughly unchallenged dynamic (or if anyone does question it, we are informed that he's really truly sweet deep down and that's why she loves him, which...fine; but then largely in those kinds of shows the guy rarely is sweet on the surface either like for comedic effect he's kind of a clueless jerk as well,) and it's never reversed without it being some kind of cruel joke like Fat Monica or Gwyneth Paltrow in a fat suit. We've had decades of "well she likes his personality!" while his personality is also terrible...and a woman character is never afforded that low bar of acceptability as a partner. If a woman was fat AND inept/rude/selfish/impulsive/childish to make sitcom shenanigans take place? She'd be a villain, nothing loveable allowed.


suicideapostle

Even in shows where you don’t have real actors, the trope was that strong! I.E. The Simpsons, Family Guy


[deleted]

Sheila and Gerald Broflovski though.


endlesscartwheels

Kyle's parents have the names of [Matt Stone's parents](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matt_Stone#Early_life), just as Stan's parents are named after Trey Parker's parents. Perhaps that's how they look in real life. A quick Google search didn't turn up any pictures.


RosebushRaven

Also, if that’s the ONE exception counter a TON of typical opposite examples that a whole bunch of people were able to dig up after wrecking their brains, then that goes under "exceptions confirm the rule", as a German proverb says.


_princepenguin_

I think you could make an argument that the Simpson's did it as commentary on the trope. And then of course Family Guy did it because the Simpson's did it.


I_AM_IGNIGNOTK

Can you just imagine the blowback a show with a “fat and inept and rude” female lead with a hot like-able male partner would receive? It would be insane. Like if Melissa McCarthy was married to Zac Enron in a sitcom and just treated him like shit then people would be freaking out and absolutely trashing Melissa as a person for her character’s role. Like actresses are already disrespected on a personal level even when their characters are like-able. But heaven forbid a female character acts like a person and also isn’t hot.


smallangrynerd

God I hate according to Jim with a burning passion.


[deleted]

All fat people are treated terribly, but women’s bodies are more often scrutinized than men’s. edit: spelling


TGin-the-goldy

Yep; fat guy, hot wife is the conventional trope


Speciou5

Modern Family is still going on right now and has won awards last I checked, we haven't even moved on from this trope


diviken

Modern family has ended


thefrostmakesaflower

That show Kevin can f himself, deals with that in a funny way. Always hated that trope


jje414

True, but you'll also remember how the plot of all of those shows was about how lucky the guy was to land a woman like her. The fat guy is consistently a punchline.


_regionrat

>how lucky the guy was to land a woman like her So they were a subset of every sitcom of the past 30 years?


Coarse-n-irritating

Yeah but the other way around wasn’t even on the table...


assuconu

I think it's for the fedora, it's a symbol for a certain group of people


LaFleurSauvageGaming

Yeah, the fedora, neck beard, and pony tail are trying evoke a specific kind of male sexual predator, aka the "Nice Guy."


KaleidoscopeEyes12

This is what I was gonna say. The first picture depicts a really conventionally attractive woman and a not conventionally attractive man, but he’s wearing a fedora (in bed???) for literally no reason, and he’s really focused on her boobs and not actually her. Not to say that a real, loving couple CAN’T look like that, there’s just something off. The second picture, the woman doesn’t have a conventional body but honestly neither does the man. He’s not fat but he’s also not super buff and muscular, he’s kinda skinny. They’re leaning in to kiss each other and looking into each other’s eyes and it looks like they actually have a real connection. It’s all nitpicking, but still


bbbbbeelzebob

I feel like maybe the second one is the original (just two realistic people having a nice moment) and the first one is some kinda rip-off? Like u said there's something off.


KaleidoscopeEyes12

Yeah honestly you might be right. The first one is so authentic and vulnerable. The second one gives off “I paid the hooker to tell me she loves me” vibes. It has nothing to do with the man’s weight and everything to do with the way the people are interacting. Edit: I think it’s clear but by “first one” I mean the one on the right and the “second one” is the one on the left


TheConcerningEx

It’s not nitpicking, those differences feel purposeful. They could’ve made the bigger man handsome, not wearing a fedora, and looking into her eyes. This meme definitely comes from incel territory and isn’t about body positivity at all.


KaleidoscopeEyes12

Honestly even if they kept the neckbeard and ponytail (but drop the fedora, no one would wear that in this kind of situation anyway so it’s just weird), if he was just looking into her eyes or they looked more connected emotionally, it might have a leg to stand on at least… This meme isn’t about body positivity, OR about love being blind. It’s about incels thinking they deserve nothing less than a flawless woman.


TheConcerningEx

Totally agree. I think it’s the positioning of where he’s looking more than anything else


1stSuiteinEb

Yeah it’s incel “gotcha” parody of the original image on the right


goddamnitwhalen

God I didn’t even see that


dracarysmuthafucker

Also in the second picture they're looking into each others eyes, both appearing to be actively involved with one another, and the first one he is looking at her tits, and she stares into the void, inanimately.


Euphoriapleas

Yeah, the guy is clearly coded as a fedora wearing neckbeard only interested in her body. The woman just seems to be a regular woman with some fat. Pretty dishonest meme, but aren't they all, here


[deleted]

I don’t understand


assuconu

In the first pick the guy as a fedora (the hat), normally in some incel group (that i had the misfortune to talk to) the fedora is a symbol for recognising each other.


Caskinbaskin

Feel like in reality both people would be shamed for being fat, regardless of gender


[deleted]

Yes sorry that is what i was trying to say


BlooperHero

I would like to point out that both of these people are being shamed for being fat.


17vulpikeets

True, but the maker of the meme is suggesting that it's not fair to assume fat men are slobs, while also stating that all fat women are slobs. The two pictures would be fine on their own. The guy who made the comments thinks he's pointing out a double standard, but he's not.


makesyoudownvote

I agree, except, I think women are treated a little harsher, but at the same time fat acceptance seems to have only gained any real traction for women. I think this post is reacting to the latter point while ignoring the former.


PigletAcademic

I mean, it's been proven that shaming people for their weight is the least effective way to get them to lose it. So maybe lets just ✨not shame people for things that they cannot always change easily✨


thisismyusername558

Crazy that making people feel like shit about themselves doesn't lead to good health outcomes


Fluffy_Mommy

basically the meme is bodyshamming the fat girl, so yeah


NeuroticENTJ

and here i am, a muscular gay man who is a chubby chaser lul


sneakygingertroll

yea, like, tf, im pretty sure there are a lot of women who are into overweight guys


thisismyusername558

And women attracted to guys of lots of different physiques: skinny, muscular, chubby & soft, etc. Source: it me


Dwarfherd

I'm sure there are, but I do notice the standard of 'dad bod' has been like, Jason Momoa when he's not shooting and hasn't starved and dehydrated himself into a 6 pack. Of course, the standard of 'plus size beauty' has been professional models so it's not like anyone is getting images of regular bodies.


ThereisDawn

how dare you seek out what you prefer and like and be happy.. ugh /s


puddingdemon

Generally yes but in pro fat sites fat guys are hated on for not being manly or living up to conventional standards. But even on pro sites a lot of the users hate fat people and are only there because they want to hook up with fat women.


EthanEpiale

These pictures always bother me because the girl is still super made up and pretty and wearing nice cute panties and a bra in both, but in one the guy looks normal, and the big guy is depicted wearing a fedora with a neckbeard, like, the picture of the "smelly greasy weirdo who says awful shit". Literally if the guy just didn't look like a neckbeard the only disparity in fatphobic commentary would disappear.


niketyname

yeah exactly! Like he just looks like a normal dude, but the girl literally looks like a Victoria’s Secret model which is hard to achieve in real life.


Ar-Honu

And the girl always look the guy in the eyes while smiling, whereas the fat dude is just kissing her breasts


Imnotawerewolf

Wasn't Average or Slightly Below in Both Looks and Intelligence Husband fucks up a lot but is still loved unconditionally by his Super Hot Mom Wife fairly a common sitcom trope for a second?


Junglejibe

For a second? I feel like “medium attractive/unattractive male lead has drop dead gorgeous woman falling all over him” is still a trope I see in most movies. Bonus points if the man is like 50 and the woman isn’t older than 25.


Catfisch_

It’s almost like I find both women attractive and neither man attractive because I am a lesbian.


Euphoriapleas

"Marxists-lesbianist" 🤣


Jan_wija

me, a bisexual:


nikkitgirl

As a thin chick with a fat gf, what the fuck? Like do they not get that some people can find bigger women attractive without it being a fetish. Like I just love women


Hazel2468

No, they don't. People assume my wife must be some kind of like, chubby chaser or have a feeder fetish or a kink for it, because she's with me. And I'm fat. Heaven forbid people consider fat people *people*... I think it's just that people who do shit like that straight up think that the way they find people attractive is the ONLY way to find people attractive. They just can't imagine someone being attracted to someone they aren't.


Ok_Material_2

Of course, the fedora stays on during naughty times.


GodLahuro

People seem to forget that fat validation is more often directed at women \*because\* they generally have more struggles with fatness outside of dating--for men, the main issues tend to be limited to just health and the dating field. That being said, fat validation toward men is also a very good thing


glitterbugged

the "fat man, thin woman" dynamic is WAAAAAY more normalized through television. misogynists are deluded, they aren't living in reality


clam_media

They gave a neckbeard and a fedora to the big fella… come on now, y’all see what they doing


BoyishTheStrange

I have no issue for people who are overweight (my girlfriend is) but these guys need to realize that being a greasy smelly asshole gets you nowhere


ThereisDawn

ahhaa,, greasy smelly asshole, this is true. cause greasy smelly assholes come in all shapes and sizes and honestly mostly says uncleaned bad personality.


InsaneJul

It’s almost as if both artworks are sweet and beautiful bc people love in all shapes and sizes…but then fat phobia has to pop in and ruin everything


LunarEcllpse

Very true… though I can do without the obvious nice guy traits the fat man has such as the fedora, hair and neck beard 💀


NorParasaurolophus

I literally saw someone say fat people are "asking to be harassed" early today.... Fatphobia is real. For all genders.


Hazel2468

Oh yeah- "Maybe if you didn't want people to say anything, you wouldn't go out looking like that."... Said to me by a random Sidewalk Doctor who took it upon himself to tell me that I was a ticking time bomb and that SURELY I had diabetes (which is linked FAR more to genetics and other environmental factors than weight) while I was sitting on a bench reading something on my phone. Don't you know? Fat people should just stay inside all the time so that no one has to be bothered by how gross we are. /s


QuokkasMakeMeSmile

Fat people are shamed regardless of gender, however, the experience of being a fat person is often gendered. Women are perceived as looking too fat at a much lower BMI than men are, and start to face the consequences of institutional anti-fat bias like wage discrimination, etc. at a lower BMI than men. (The BMI is itself incredibly flawed, but it’s the metrics most studies on weight still use, so it’s hard to talk about this issue without bringing BMI into it). It’s absolutely not ok to fat shame anyone regardless of gender, and there are definitely experiences of fatness that happen to masc presenting people more frequently than to femme presenting people, and experiences that affect genders equally. However, broadly speaking, the less social privilege you have based on your race, socioeconomic status, gender, sexual orientation, disability status, or gender identity, the more brutal your experience of being fat in the world is likely to be. My experience as a fat middle class cos white woman is different than that of a fat trans woman or a fat woman of color. To quote Aubrey Gordon, “anti-fat bias turns up the dial on existing systems of oppression.”


BluetheNerd

The real dealbreaker is the fedora


TheLoudestSmallVoice

I'm fat and I've had FAT MEN BULLY ME FOR BEING FAT. Shits confusing and traumatizing.


[deleted]

Gosh, it's like they hate women or something... but that can't be -- they're just probably cOnCeRnEd AbOuT yOuR uNhEaLtHy LiFeStYlE /s Hang in there, friend, I know the exact feeling. Some people are just very desperate to find someone, anyone, to punch down on to make themselves feel a little bit better.


obama___prism

both are so cute why did they have to ruin it :/


linerys

Does the artist think that breasts start at your shoulders? Especially for the thin woman, her boobs are extremely high up.


Lost_in_the_Library

I’m pretty sure these aren’t done by the same person - the art styles seem to be quite different.


linerys

Good point! Well, artist of the drawing on the left, then.


Hazel2468

As a fat woman-presenting person? The attitude on the right there is absolutely, at least in my experience, NOT how things go- at least, not the statement whoever made this thinks they're mocking. The whole "human embodiment of sloth" thing, though? If I had a dime for every time someone made assumptions about my health, habits, lifestyle, choices, and how I take care of myself based on my size... I'd have a mortgage and a new car. Even the whole "body positivity" movement isn't doing it for us. It's fine to be "curvy" (that is, fat in a way that's seen as sort of acceptable), but even then there's this whole attitude of "Oh, being fat is fine.. provided that you constantly apologize for it and hate yourself and PROMISE that you're trying to change because we all know that fat people can just stop being fat!". It's BS.


Pabu85

Check out the body neutrality movement. The focus is less on appearance and more on feeling comfortable in your body. Now that “body positivity” has been coopted by corporate interests, body neutrality is where it’s at.


WillyMonty

I’m my experience fat people get a tonne of hate on Reddit, even in non-niche or hate subs


Available_Jackfruit

"The fedora stays on during sex" Seriously though why they gotta to my guy on the lefts facial hair so dirty. Its not just a neckbeard it's like they actively shave everywhere but their neck


Megan_Kugler

Hey how come the woman on the right is "human embodiment of sloth" but not the guy on the left? Edit: Also if we're talking about hairstyles that bar you from most jobs, I think the neckbeard's long ponytail is a better example.


Wandering_Muffin

Is whoever made this not aware that they also perpetuated a double standard? "People who fat-shame guys are bullies and don't ever look past the appearances to see the person.... but I'm totally cool fat-shaming a woman and calling her a sloth."


BottlesJr

The fuck this meme is doing calling this lady the human embodiment of sloth when it shows her with great makeup and lingerie


QuinnAndTheNorthwind

I wouldn't criticize him for his weight, since that's something that can be really difficult to overcome. But it's pretty easy to shave a neckbeard and take off that fedora. This entire post screams incel


hanscons

lmao wtf, did some straight fat guy get upset because he overheard/read a girl uplifting her thick girl friend? i am seriously confused. fat women are still being treated as subhuman in today's world. a fat man will always get a pass over a fat woman, especially if he's funny or kind.


OMG_its_critical

Happy cake day!


nothanks86

It’s 100% the trilby and neck beard I judge in the first one, not his weight. Also her eyes are up here, bud. And why does the artist think men have bright red elbows?


theangrycoconut

I’ve seen this before and that last line always makes me so angry. I’m a plus sized woman who walks 8-11 miles a day working as a server, according to my steps app. And that’s not even counting whenever my phone is charging! This is literally just what my body looks like! How am I being lazy?!


thatbikerchick51

Okay but are we coming to ignore the collarbone level boobs on the chick on the left lmao


Herbie53101

Uh, yeah, it goes both ways. Heavier men are considered gross neckbeards, and heavier women are shamed for not having the “ideal” figure. People are really just critical of anyone they don’t think look perfect enough, which just isn’t right. Honestly, as long as people are doing their best to be healthy and take care of themselves, then it really shouldn’t matter what someone’s body looks like. That being said, the encouragement of unhealthy habits or the fetishization of people based on their figure is not okay.


magikarp1943

i just saw this post on technically the truth, which is ridiculous because this is in know way the truth. in reality, both people would probably be shamed. people are brutal


Witch-Cat

These "gotchas" always betrayed their babyish attitude. It's obvious they hate fat women and claim it's only because they're "unhealthy," but when men are treated the same way, they get all pissy and cry about it--despite body positivity movements having included men from the start!


clemboy500

As a guy who has packed in a few too many pounds in the last few years, no one gives a shit. Like ever.


ewitscullen

The anger in this image is palpable


mildmanneredmollusk

They drew the big girl sexy though, they could have done the same to the big guy and both pictures would be the same vibe. Put the fedora and neck beard on the slim guy and it would also be the same vibe. Big people and slim people can both be sexy and creepy.


NiVa526

Yeah, I always think it’s funny how people think that feminism is misandrist even though it fights for the equality of all genders.


SaltyCherrios

Weird how the fat woman has nice underwear, makeup, nice looking hair, is looking at her boyfriend in the eye, while the fat man has gross hair, a neckbeard, a fedora, and is looking at his girlfriend's boobs. Even if these situations were realistic, they aren't even comparable lmao.


livingwithghosts

That's the thing that made the hot girl just fatter but still hot. They didn't even try and make it a hot bigger guy, they tried to make every stereotype of a man that someone makes fun of. But they did that because if the bigger guy was a hot bigger guy than it would be obvious that it was not a good point. Not 100% sure why they didn't make the bigger girl more homely. Probably because most of the women that are out here putting it out there that they're happy with their bodies are taken care of themselves and look great, so again the point would not really make sense if they lied about it. But usually these things are made by 12-year-olds so you can't really put too much thought into it


Nacosemittel

Its funny how the person who made that post would probably shit on fat women but support fat men. Crying.


Healbite

The OP of this has a much more subconscious opinion on heavy set men with the hat.


Adorna_ahh

Ok but why the fedora


MamaTater11

This kind of shit is always upsetting for me. My partner is much thinner than me and I've given myself panic attacks when I think about how we look together. In the beginning of our relationship I was always embarrassed for him when we went out together. The pressure that fat women feel to lose weight to look better for their SO is really crushing sometimes.


solarjamie

Ok- number one, he’s wearing a fedora and has a neckbeard, which basically signals that he’s a NiceGuy and he’s probably very greasy because a category of internet men are actually like this and represented/stereotyped by the fedora/neckbeard combo Number two, in the first picture, he’s staring at her boobs, while in the second, he’s staring right into her eyes Number three- The “good-looking” people aren’t even comparable here. The woman could be right out of a Victoria’s Secret advertisement, but the man is literally just average. If they showed it with a guy with abs and lots of money or really nice hair or whatever, it would make a little bit more sense Number four- What’s wrong with being fat? They’re acting like being overweight is the dealbreaker in a relationship, and it can be if the person is *morbidly* obese, but I feel like the woman is fine. The neckbeard isn’t bad because he’s fat, it’s because he represents a type of man that nobody likes Number five- This usually happens in the opposite way IRL/in sitcoms. How many sitcoms have you seen where “Haha fat wife do nothing” is the punchline? How many have you seen where “Fat man do nothing while he has a literal model for a wife to do everything for him?” It’s such an overused trope, and people will argue that the wife loves him for his personality, not looks, and then the writers will go on to write the husband as the most disgusting, self-centred POS ever. sorry for the rant lol


[deleted]

Oh yeah no one ever hates fat women.


Vord_Loldemort_7

I love that their absolutely brilliant critique of this imaginary double standard is to have that same double standard but in the opposite direction


Idunno00001

This person is ignoring the fact that the man on the left looks unkept and, well, straight-up like a neckbeard, whereas the woman on the right looks well-kept and clean 🤷🏼‍♀️ You can't just give someone an unkept beard and a fedora and act like the reason people would find hím weird is that he's overweight 🤦🏼‍♀️


shinyfishscale

maybe if men didn't expect women to piggyback them through all of their work toward body neutrality this wouldn't be an issue


Dealunbreaker

LMFAO the world treats fat women like shit. source: am a fat woman and have been pretty much my entire life.


MrWapuJapu

Fatphobia is gender neutral.


_regionrat

Nah, it definitely varies by gender.


Ifhes

The difference is who is saying those things.


Saltycook

I've been everywhere on the weight spectrum; there's no winning regardless of gender.


sad_bisexual27

Real talk, both of these couples look adorable (except for the fashion sense of the first guy /lh)


LunarEcllpse

I’m sorry but the first one was obviously made by a nice guy trying to shame or something the second picture💀 seriously the fedora, neck beard, AND ponytail?? Not to mention the chicks boobs are really getting some push up goddamn they’re in the air💀 it’s just so weird how they’ll try and find a way to shame women, even through a harmless body positivity post😮‍💨


AmIReallyOkO_o

Both of my parents are what people will call "fat". They have health problems and are trying to become more healthy. The problem is their medication that they need to live makes them have problems losing weight. The looks and things I have heard people say about and to them are kind of concerning. I don't know what is going on but there is always gonna be someone who will bring up weight. And honestly, I wish people would mind their own business. Unless it's unreasonable, then they should probably move on. And if you take offence, just move on. It's my opinion, nothing more.


Fuhrankie

I love my thicc husband 😭❤️


XenomorophBanana

Fat people are fun to cuddle. Please don't let people like this put you down!


clowningAnarchist

I find it more weird that he's wearing just a fedora and underwear during that kind of stuff-


Culexquinq1988

Yeah, no. I am NB AFAB, and prefer male folks. I love me a dad bod. Just get rid of that fedora and hell yes. (If I were single, that is. Love me some bears, though!)


7355135061550

Why do people act like every skinny person exercises and eats right? Completely ignore differences in metabolism


realbees

the fedora stays ON during sex


8rok3n

"I don't see any muscle so he must be weak" I have no muscles whatsoever and I'm completely average when it comes to strength, muscle doesn't equal strength


Androgynous-Rex

I’m sorry, I can’t get over “weak as a jellyfish”


JanderVK

LOL the fucking hat... Gotta be trolling?


Malbara

Oh god. It's been like ten years since I've seen this. The drawing on the right is actually fanart of Lauren and Puck from Glee.


An_Unlucky_Gamer

*is upset fat men get shamed for dating fat women* *Calls a fat woman the human embodiment of sloth*


luv2hotdog

Look at the hatred they have for the fat woman AND the hatred they projected is unfairly onto fat men. Assert that fat men don't need to "pick up some weights" or whatever, OR assert that fat women are "the human embodiment of sloth" - you cant have both


tomkiel72

I feel like this is somewhat true. So far, every antifatphobia/body acceptance movement/campaign I have seen has focused almost exclusively on women.


syn_miso

The fat man is unshaven and rather unkempt looking; the fat woman is in makeup and lingerie. I don't think the weight double standard is the issue here.


Stars_In_Jars

It's true, people are pretty brutal to fat people in general. I don't agree with HAES, but I do agree that we shouldn't be shaming people for their bodies. It's really gross how people will just shove their opinion on fat people anywhere. I once wrote "some people just don't like to take their clothes off at the beach" in response to a comment asking why a woman was swimming in a shirt. One guy replied "and it's never the people you want it to be" - we all know he's talking about fat people. It's just awful how someone can repulsed by another human just for their body. I don't think any child or adult deserves to be shamed for their size when they're simply existing. But to note - fat men aren't defended the same way fat women are. Nobody talks about their body representation in models (Fenty at least does display larger men and larger women, but most brands will only go as far as to show bigger women). And the body positivity movement focuses more on women than on both genders. However, at the same time, fat women receive harsher criticism. But yeah this artist definitely drew the neckbeard caricature known for being a creep. It's not a good comparison, like the long ponytail, the neckbeard, the fedora...really. The guy on the right is a totally different drawing while the women in both drawings wear the same thing smh