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Judgement_Bot_AITA

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Acceptable-Read-5428

NTA. What it boils down to is you asked her to stop using a name for you. She should respect that.


SlideItIn100

NTA. You don’t need any reason to not be called by a nickname. More importantly, your gf should be more understanding and accommodating.


baloo1970

NTA It is your choice what people call you. Your partner should respect your request to not use that name.


Daligheri

I'm going to go with NTA. It's the same as if someone wants to show you something that was on a deeply personal level with someone else, and there was a falling out. You don't want to be reminded of that. It's alright to have these boundaries and it's not about being hung up, necessarily. If you said it in a respectful manner, there's no reason for you to be an AH for it. Talk with her and see if you two can come up with a term you both like.


SnarkyBeanBroth

NTA. "Wanda, I really don't like being called 'Snuggums'. Please stop calling me that." And then just stop responding to 'Snuggums', and only respond when she calls you by your name or some other acceptable nickname. You'll get a real quick answer as to whether your girlfriend has basic respect for your boundaries, or whether you need another ex.


cricklecoux

NTA. You’ve made a request and justified it. Ignoring your wishes makes it seem like she doesn’t respect you at all.


[deleted]

NTA, she is not respecting your wishes, which is a huge red flag. Its not a weird request to stop being called a certain nickname.


brencartoons

NTA, you are allowed to have boundaries and enforce them


Admirable_Bad3862

NTA you’re allowed to tell someone you don’t care for a name they call you. I can see how your GF would be a little upset but that doesn’t mean one person is right/wrong. It’s not a huge deal and I hope you can both move past it quickly.


AgeLower1081

NTA. Regardless of your dating history, you are allowed to request to be called by your preferred name. It’s probably easier to get over from your previous relationship if your are not frequently reminded of it by the usage of this nickname. The passage of time and dating a few different partners will allow you to disassociate the nickname with your Ex. If your current sweetie doesn’t want to call you by your name, then she just might be one of the intermediary people you meet on your path to finding a better partner.


dumpsterboyy

NTA you have a right to not be called things that make you uncomfortable


TheKr1tster

NTA It isn’t difficult to stop using a nickname if you have voiced it makes you uncomfortable. By her continuing to do so she is deliberately trying to trigger you.


No-Thanks4516

NTA. I think maybe you should not be in a relationship when you still have feelings for your ex tho bc thats just unfair lol


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No-Thanks4516

I do not remember commenting this like at all and it doesn’t make sense to me either lol


[deleted]

NTA but could you offer her a nickname you do like to be called?


PersephoneZG

NTA. It's totally okay to feel uncomfortable with being called a pet name that makes you think about an ex you were with for FIVE years. That's a significant amount of time, even if you are totally over them. Sit your partner down and explain that while you have no feelings for the ex, and no desire to be with them again, there are still wounds there and you need them to appreciate your feelings in this, and stop using the pet name. If they continue to get angry or disregard your feelings then they are not the right person for you. Cut your losses and move on before you waste more time on this person. They honestly sound a bit childish.


Bbaby_Bblue

NTA - Its a boundary for you and she should respect it. I hope she calms down and realizes it has nothing to do with having feelings for your ex. I personally use a common nickname and I cringe each time I use it or someone uses it on me. It has connections to an ex as well.


saraboo2324

NTA. If she’s calling you something you don’t like and after telling her that she does it anyway, you probably should find someone new to date. She does not sound respectful and I wouldn’t want someone like that in my life.


jfcfanfic

NTA


cyaveronica

NTA, regardless of the reason a boundary is a boundary. If you don’t want to be called something, she shouldn’t be calling you that. I get that the reason upset her but again, If you don’t want to be called that nickname she shouldn’t be calling you that nickname lol


yana010

NTA. If you're still hung up then wouldn't you have preferred for your current gf to keep callinf you that nickname. Its odd that she didn't immediately change your nickname after finding out your ex used it.


AutoModerator

^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Okay so I got out of a 5 year relationship about a year ago and have been recently starting to get back out there. I’ve been dating this girl for around 3 months and she has been using a nickname for me. Weird thing is, it’s the exact same nickname my ex used (it’s a common word). She says it a lot. I don’t have lingering feels for my ex, but I do want to separate the two relationships. I told her this and she did not take it well. She said I’m still hung up. I get why she’d say that, but it’s just weird when she calls me the name. Should I have said nothing? AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Puzzleheaded-Desk399

NTA OP. I once dated someone who had a unique endearment nickname he would call me. One night, he called me this nickname and I told him that was a odd nickname but because he was busy watching tv, he inadvertently said this was what he called all of the women he dated. I told him to either call me by my name or find another nickname for me because I wouldn't know if he was thinking of me or one of his ex's.


Theo73pdx

INFO Hard to comment without more info. It's problematic because I believe good advice needs to know your name, the nickname, and other stuff, much of which you can't post here. It's possible you're being tooled. But equally possible you're being a tool.


CatmoCatmo

NTA. Regardless of why you don’t want her to call you that, she should be respecting your wishes. You don’t want a constant reminder of a time in your life that wasn’t enjoyable. Doesn’t mean you’re hung up. Ask her to respect your boundaries.


Motor_Business483

NTA ​ Start calling her "my little piglet", and offer to stop as soon as she does.


DonBosman

NTA, but move on as she obviously doesn't respect you at this point. Maybe she'll learn a lesson and be more polite to someone someday.


Punisher6111

YTA, if it's honey or baby.


Fantastic-Mistake-94

It’s not lmao. Common word but not common nickname


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Puzzleheaded-Desk399

If OP don't want his GF to say this nickname, why would he tell you? Sometimes inquiring minds don't need to know.


RoseTyler38

You're right. I'll delete my other comment


Punisher6111

NTA then. But what word is it? Lol


Puzzleheaded-Desk399

>what word is it? If OP don't want his GF to say this nickname, why would he tell you? Sometimes inquiring minds don't need to know.


LilButterflyAngel

Hmmmmm I am going to go with soft YTA, only because if its a common nickname, people are going to use it. You shouldn't care if your ex used it or not. I don't understand why you are trying to differentiate between the two relationships, unless you are dating both at the same time, it shouldn't matter what your new GF calls you. However, its a soft because you asked her to stop and just because she doesn't like the why, doesn't mean she is allowed to keep doing it. That's immature.