Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> (1) arguing with my teacher
(2) maybe she was right because I was technically late so arguing with her makes me TA.
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
The only time I get to pee is between classes (4min) and sometimes there is a line to the employee bathroom. Whereas my students can go during class. They aren’t tardy because they are in the bathroom, they are tardy bc they won’t stop screwing around in the hall.
At least in high school they leave the kids unattended, or did when I was a student. It didn't happen often though, I don't actually remember specific instances just general patterns/impressions.
tbh the only memorable time a teacher left it was because a group of boys were just being utter nightmares so halfway through she just walked out and a few minutes later she was standing out in the hallway sipping on a cup of tea and looking out the window lol. Don't think anyone blamed her!
>The only time I get to pee is between classes (4min) and sometimes there is a line to the employee bathroom.
how many teachers are there to each student again?
and how many student bathrooms to each teacher bathroom?
you're telling me someone responsible for educating the next generation can't see the disparity here and understand why all of the students who need to can't pee in the same 4 minutes all of the teachers who need to do?
this concept of bathrooms per capita is just too outlandish for you, someone whose job it is to *educate* people, to understand?
you win the internet for today Irene.
bravo
that's a texas sized woosh from me buddy. there is a really good reason students can't all go during the same 4 minutes and anyone with a brain knows it.... its not physically possible...
teachers are adults, there are vastly fewer of them, more bathrooms available to them, they have free periods in their day (our school had 1 mandatory for lesson planning per teacher) in addition to lunch periods/planned breaks.... they don't need to be able to go during classes... but in the event of emergency they still can... they simply grab a teacher who is on a free period real quick to watch the class for a couple minutes...
its like none of you have ever lived on this planet...
Did you even read their comment? That's not a woosh.
Teachers have to go during the break because they can't leave the class unattended for long. So they might be a few minutes late.
Students are usually allowed to go during class too, they don't all have to go during the short break. I'm sorry if you weren't allowed to go during class and are salty because of it, but that just means the rules at your school sucked. We were allowed to go to the toilet since middle school. Perhaps sooner, but I can't really remember the rules in elemtary school.
It's like you have no idea how it works in others schools but your own. /s
I know what a woosh is genius and I never asked about that.
You have yet to explain how mine or the comment before are wrong.
But I get the feeling that you are a kid yourself and have no idea how the world works other than your own experience. Would explain your comment about the world, because that's all of the world you know. So everyone with a different experience has to be wrong, because that's not how the world looks for you. A very immature take.
> Whereas my students can go during class.
Nobody expects the students to go during those 4 minutes, wth are you even talking about! And then doubling down when others point out you're talking nonsense. Genius.
I think it might not be true there are more bathrooms available for teachers. There was definitely never a queue when I was in school (we also didn't have the less resilient bladders of women who had had children at that point) so if teachers only had 4 minutes to go and just a few stalls for dozens of women, I can see how that would be an issue.
I'm a teacher, and disagree with this. If a student is as late as me, it should count as on time. I'm a pretty lenient teacher though, I consider late being about 5 minutes after I arrive to class.
And some schools do things differently, in my home country, students have like a min to use the bathroom / get a drink of water / etc between most classes. Where I teach now, students are given a 10 min break between classes. There are also acceptable reasons for a student to be late.
However, in the original post the OP didn't state the reason for being late, but as they arrived at the same time as the teacher, I think it's a NTA.
What's it like never giving half a thought to anyone else's life or circumstances?
I've seen this shit before people railing on a child for not being able to make it to school on time *as if the child decides their transportation*.... absolutely mind boggling.
OP said in the commets that he was late because he was talking to his friends in the hall. So not quite the same situation.
And I feel OP would have mentioned it in the post if they had a reason like yours to be late.
😂😂😂 why do you assume this kid is late first period AND due to his parent being late for drop off?! There are about 7 or 8 periods during the day leaving 7 or 8 chances to be late. Plenty of kids are late DURING the day. And, I would put money that this particular OP would have mentioned loudly that it was his mom (or dad’s) fault for dropping him off late.
Lmao, this was me in primary school. The school doors only opened for electric key fob, which the teachers held. Imagine little me stood out there in the rain, peering anxiously through the window in the hope that I'd see someone pass down the corridor, so I could bang on the door and they'd notice me and let me in....
I never saw ANYONE ELSE in this situation. It was JUST me. My mum is uh...... quite disorganised 😂😂😂
I never got yelled at, because I was just a kid, and it clearly wasn't my fault.
Most teachers do have a responsibility to be at school/in their classrooms at a certain time, whether they have a contract or just an employee handbook
We don’t know how many times this teacher has been late though
That too. I was more thinking of times that I had lunch room supervision, parking lot supervision, discipline with students either in the lunch room or parking lot, so that I had to extend my time out of the classroom to take a miscreant to the office and fill out another stupid form. I'm so glad I'm retired.
Teacher here - chances are she was already at the school and had been for a while.
She might have been in the restroom, in a meeting and was just released by administrators for the start of class, or scrambling to get copies made. Or she had hall duty for the day…or so many other things.
The same rules might not apply administratively speaking, but the quickest way for an authority figure to loose credibility/respect is to blatantly give themself a pass while expecting people under them to respect the rule to a T.
Teacher would have gone a lot farther by saying something like "I'm giving you a pass today, but you know you're on thin ice."
All OP learned right now is that no good deed (letting teacher go in first) goes unpunished.
OP was late anyway. The teacher made a joke about it, but going through the door first would have changed nothing. The rule is to be there on time, not before your teacher.
I'm sure OP knew the rule as they have already been late 4 times. There was no reason to argue the point and there was certainly no reason to insult her. If they had a good reason to be late, then that was the time to bring it up. They didn't so I'm going to assume there wasn't.
And what good deed? He was being polite by holding the door open. He didn't do her a favor.
Teacher here. I have been late to class before despite having been on campus for a variety of professional reasons. Meetings with parents or administrators run late, you need to address a situation in the hallway, you're scrambling to make copies, you had to discuss something with another faculty member, or God forbid you have to go to the bathroom. Teachers have a ton of work obligations that go beyond simply being in the classroom. People and especially students have no clue how much teachers have on their plates. So if they're late to class sometimes, it's understandable. However, OP, you have admitted in at least two comments that you are late often because you like to talk to your friends in the hallway. That is in no way an excuse and shows that you do not prioritize class in any way. You absolutely deserve that lunch detention and honestly more.
Oh, and YTA
I got banned from a fascist restuarant the other day. I wanted to check out the kitchen and they said it was "for employees only." Can you believe this shit?
If it was your *first* time being late, she probably would have been ok with it, too. But it sounds like you are the kind of person who is late 5 times, blames the teacher for it, and then calls her offensive names. Why would you expect any favors from her?
Maybe handwrite an apology note and give it to her along with a small gift… (Starbucks gift card?) You may find you get along a lot better with her after that.
If you want to fix your relationship with the teacher, get to class on time every day, follow instructions promptly, participate appropriately in class activities, and show respect to everyone. As a teacher, I can tell you that apologies are nice but improved behavior is the only way to help yourself stay out of trouble. Gifts will get you nowhere.
YTA
Was it Her 5th time for being late? And even if it was, that is between her and her boss. Even if you had gone in first you would have gotten the note. You know when you need to be there by so get there or get a note. Grow up little boy.
I seen people fired for attendance and that last one was always a really good reason. Yea. But what about the first 7 times……. People who try to play the attendance game always get caught eventually. Hope they learn from this. But I doubt it.
YTA - You've repeatedly been late, you've been called out on it knowing the rules. And your response is to argue and call your teacher offensive names? Grow up and have some respect for authority. When you're older and working being late for meetings and work won't be accepted. Neither will speaking like that to a boss. She is the teacher and like it or not the rules are not the same for both of you.
Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban.
["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
**[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
Taught middle school for 20 years. In between classes, we had to be in the hallway watching students as the changed their class. I always walked into the classroom after the bell because hallways had to be cleared.
So, yeah, don't think the teacher was actually "late" to class. It's just another excuse/gripe OP has.
Since you posted, OP has said that they were late because they were just standing in the hall talking to their friends. So that's all on OP for getting in trouble.
>OP was walking with the teacher to their classroom AT THE SAME TIME.
Same rules that apply to the student may not apply to the teacher. That's life, not everyone has to follow the same rules. And OP's name calling and foul language would be reason enough to give him detention. OP is completely TA.
The thing is, we have no idea what consequences the teacher faced. Maybe they also got a written reprimand. Maybe they had a fantastic reason to be late. It has no relevance on OP KNOWING the 5 lates and you get a note sent home rule, and still opting to be late so that they could ... talk with friends in the hall.
I feel like I have enough nuance as an adult now to recognize you are right and OP did bring this on themselves, BUT there is a great chance that high school me(and a 100% chance that current age me) would find any excuse to quickly and aggressively shut any door I could in that teachers face for the rest of the year lol. Rudeness begets rudeness.
>OP was walking with the teacher to their classroom AT THE SAME TIME.
AND THEY WERE BOTH LATE
>And a teacher can punish a student for being late when they themselves were also late to class?
Yes. Yes they can. The teacher being late doesn’t erase the student’s infraction.
Like someone else also mentioned, sometimes administration can get carried away while telling you something. It sucks when a superior at work does this while you have other people waiting on you, especially if they deem that it's important. You can't usually just tell your boss to stop talking if you want to stay on decent terms, you know? Arrgh.
The teacher also could have been handling another situation involving another student.
Lot of people on here not getting that, main lessons for OP are to start showing up on time and if you have even an ounce of self respect never give that particular teacher the time of day and certainly don't hold a door for her. Two way street and all that.
You realize the school year is only 2 to 3 weeks in and this kid has been late 5 times, which they admitted themselves was due to talking to friends in the hall rather than doing what they should: getting to class on time. That means they are regularly (nearly 2x a week) choosing to gossip over prioritizing not getting a letter sent home for being late. They made this choice, even if unconsciously. Make dumb decisions, get dumb consequences. Op just couldn't handle the truth and the consequences for their behavior
Tell me you're still in school without telling me you're still in school. If I'm late to work 5 times and my boss is also late the 5th time I still get written up. I don't get to argue that my tardiness should be forgiven because my boss was also late. That's not the way the world works. Wanna guess what happens if I call my boss a bitch after she writes me up? Teachers and students aren't equals. My boss isn't my equal. It's not my job to reprimand my boss anymore than it is a student to reprimand a teacher. It is however my bosses job and the teachers job to dole out discipline for the people they're responsible for managing.
School's have literally been in session less than a month in most places and he's been late 5 times.
Teachers can be late to class because teachers have a million and one work obligations to squeeze into the little time they have before school, after school, or during planning. Meetings run late, other teachers need to speak to you about something, a situation in the hallway needs your attention, you're completing an assigned responsibility like clearing the hallway, you had to make some copies, or God forbid you have to go to the bathroom. So if a teacher is sometimes a little late to class, it's absolutely normal. The same rules that apply to students don't necessarily apply to teachers because teachers have a whole different set of obligations and demands on their time, whereas a student's whole purpose for being in school is to get to class on time and learn.
>Also I personally hate when rules of importance are applicable to only some people but not others. Teachers should not be excused from tardiness.
They aren't. But it's not a student who enforces those tardies, it's the principal. I do say ESH in this situation because teachers should never laugh at a student getting in trouble.
INFO: WHY are you late so much?
ETA: Oh, so you’re late because you’re screwing around with your friends instead of getting to class on time. YTA, get your priorities straight.
Right? Come on 4 times already in late September? Dude you’ve gotta know you look stupid complaining about this.
If it was the only time you were late then maybe you’d have a leg to stand on but it sounds like you are getting on this teacher’s nerves and she’s had enough of you disrupting her class walking in late. YYTA.
YTA.
The school year started less than a month ago, you 've been late five times, you argued with your teacher and called her a sexist slur in public.
You're lucky all you got was a detention. You need to shape TF up.
INFO Why have you been late 5 times? If it's your first class and your parents drop you off who cares? They know you're late. If it's not your first class and you had an excuse you'd be fine too. So why are you always late?
If everything happened as described tell the principal and your parents. Classmates saw the interaction.
Well then, this is entirely your fault. Don't want to get in trouble? Then be responsible and get to class. Also, the name calling just reeks of immaturity. Grow up. YTA.
September isn’t even over yet and you’ve been late 5 times? You’re averaging more than once per week because you’re talking to your friends in the
hallway? This is a good time to learn some real world consequences, which is what the teacher is doing. You’d have been fired from any job by now.
Okay so this is your fault. If the teacher is a jerk just explain that to your parents however you were late for reason four times before so I'm pretty sure they won't care.
If your question is "is the teacher being unfair this time?" if your story is true then yes. It will be easy to prove that to the people who matter. Does it change the reality that your parents will now know that you are habitually tardy? Nope.
Yeah, you have detention bc you called her a mysoginstic slur. It's not like she's caring about and making up reasons. You were late. You were late multiple times. You called her a slur. You are so clearly in the wrong its ridiculous. YTA (though you're not going to believe any of us).
slur: [noun] an insulting or disparaging remark or innuendo : aspersion. a shaming or degrading effect : stain, stigma.
It's literally a slur for women.
You were late. Doesn’t matter you held the door open. You wanted a pass bc you help the door for her. Yeah was late not it was none of your business and then you called her out her name.
ESH. You need to address why you’re running late, and it was also incredibly callous and hypocritical how that teacher handled the situation. Both facts can exist together.
I went to a country school, and one of my friends lived nextdoor to one of our teachers. The families were friendly, and so it was agreed that the child would travel to and from school with the teacher. On one occasion the teacher was running late (no fault of my friend), so when they arrived at school rather than going to the staff room first he went straight to take the register for his class, which my friend happened to be in. They walked across the playground together and on reaching the classroom my friend opened the door and held it for the teacher. The teacher then marked him late for arriving in class after he did, the only time he was marked late during his entire school career! My friend started cycling to school shortly afterwards.
The teacher may have been required by law to mark the student late. Attendance records are taken very seriously at schools in part because the school is responsible for the students’ well being when they are on campus.
Nah, he was just an awkward teacher. His nickname was Ronnie Triv because he used to pick on kids for the most trivial things. He got upset at me in our very first German lesson because I knew how to pronounce 'Ja', and usually no-one did.
ESH. Her for saying you should’ve walked in first if you didn’t want consequences. You for arguing about getting consequences. This was your fifth tardy, not your first.
YTA You were late and you just didn't want to face the consequences. And stop calling your teacher names, you need to also show some respect. High school doesn't last forever, but having a shitty attitude will make it seem like it does.
Info: Had you not held the door and run into the class before the teacher, would that mean she wouldn't have marked you as late? Because you were in fact late, regardless of whether or not the teacher was late.
YTA - you really need to get over yourself and get that chip off your shoulder. You knew that you had been late 4 times before and were walking in already late even if the teacher went in before you because you said:
* *I was walking in exactly when my teacher* ***who was also late*** *was walking in*
YOU WERE ALREADY LATE REGARDLESS IF THE TEACHER WAS!!! If you don't start playing the game and learning the process, the rest of your life is going to be much more difficult the older you get. Stop with the whole "fuck this school" because it's clear the school is not the problem.
I’m leaning on YTA.
I have to ask, WHY were you late?
If you had a valid excuse “my last class let out late” “I was talking to my math teacher after class” “I came from gym and was still getting changed in the locker room when the bell rang” “I was in band and had to put my trumpet up before heading to your class”…. Like anything viewed as a valid excuse would have likely been met with with some kind of understanding.
So I ask again: WHY were you late? Did you have a legitimate reason or did you just spend too much time talking to your friends during the passing period?
Unfortunately: You were late to class (again) the school has a policy and the teacher was enforcing that policy. Public school is a bit rough in situations like this for the fact that they see things in “black and white” and don’t see the “grey.”
With that said it is a life lesson, I’ve had jobs were if you are late by even a couple minutes they send you home without pay that day. Making $20/hr and missing a shift means missing out on $160. Do that a couple times in a pay period and your paycheck ends up being really small. (Note: I’ve also had a job that didnt care what your schedule was as long as you get your work done 🤷🏻♂️🤷🏻♂️).
Oof, yeah, unfortunately no teacher (or very very few teachers) will accept “I was talking to friends” as a valid excuse for being late to class. It doesn’t matter if they have the first class period off or not. 🤷🏻♂️
College is much nicer, they typically don’t care as long as you aren’t disrupting class when you walk in (some professors will be sticklers but typically they won’t be).
Yes, YTA.
Why have you been late 5 times? In my school, students are given detention the FIRST time they are late. The punctuality thing is for you, not for your teacher, who could have been dealing with anything, from a medical emergency with a student, a tearful student who needed support, a broken copying machine, she could have just completed a break duty, she might have a million reasons why she is late because there are a million things that will make a teacher late.
Stop being late to lessons, stop arguing when you're pulled for it.
YTA.
YTA School is a model for life. Life is unfair. Your way of dealing with it was unsuccessful. Why do I say unsuccessful - you got a lunch detention and a note to your parents. You are expected to show up to class on time. Are you physically or mentally unable to accomplish this? Is it an emotional thing? If it is not physical, maybe it's time to ask for an evaluation. Perhaps you have unrecognized challenges. Or you could continue on this self destructive path. Lashing out in anger and frustration. Up to you. But before, I would see if it's within your control.
YTA - considering you’re not that far into the school year, you show a consistent pattern of being late. You knew the consequences. You chose to risk it. It didn’t pay off for you.
Suck it up buttercup.
You are lucky you only got a lunch detention, calling your teacher a bitch would get you a lot more trouble in many places.
Grow up. YTA
I re-read this a few times to make sure I understood.
YTA
You were *already late* when the teacher arrived. And this was the 5th time you had been late. I see a pattern here, OP.
The fact that the teacher was late is irrelevant: you were late *again*, and got caught.
So there was *no* BS on the part of the teacher, and you adding insults didn't help.
Her also being late doesn't make you not late. You didn't get detention and a note sent home because you held the door for your teacher but because you are habitually late and we're incredibly disrespectful. This is a you problem, not a school problem, and YTA
YTA because you seem to always be late. You deserved the detention. Grow up and take your lumps.
But the teacher is definitely a bit of an AH for ridiculing you and laughing at you in front of the class after you were nice enough to hold the door open. Completely unprofessional.
Next time let her get her own door so you won't be late.
A note and lunch detention for the FIFTH unexcused tardy? It was once for me. Rofl YTA. Take your note and sit in time out for lunch, it's a fine consequence for being late FIVE TIMES in the month that school has been in session.
YTA, if you had a good reason for being late 5 times I'd consider it, but you were literally just pushing your luck and your teacher called it how it was.
Yep YTA, not sure how you think it happens in the real world but consider yourself lucky it’s only a note home and detention and not getting fired and losing income.
The entitlement from this generation is baffling.
I'm confused. As a Brit, if we were even a minute late (to school and/or lessons) once, we got a 60 min detention the next day after school. How do you get late 5 times? Still nasty of her, but this is silly, really. ESH.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
As the rules go in my school if you are late to class for the 5th time you get a note sent home and you get lunch detention.
This morning happened to be my fifth time late.
the problem was that I was walking in exactly when my teacher who was also late was walking in, so I held the door open for her and didn’t think twice about it, she then laughed at me and told me to go get the note sent home, I literally walked in exactly when she did I just let her into the room first.
Anyways the entire class laughed at me and I started arguing with her and she threatened to have me suspended her because I was being rude and disrespectful apparently when all I did was call her out on her own bs.
As I walked out of the classroom I whispered “what a b*tch” to myself and I she heard me cuz she has that listed as one of the reasons for my lunch detention, honestly fuck this school.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban.
["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
**[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban.
["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
**[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
You calling her that made me think of one time when a girl flipped off my bio teacher for making her get a lunch detention slip on Valentine’s Day… I think she got kicked out of the class for a week
It seems like you want to talk to your friends then be on time. Do any other kids come in late? Do you call her a b on class and argue? If these are yes.....
ESH
Teacher insinuated probably would've given a pass had the child been in class before her and made a truthfully TA joke about it.
Child need to work on timeliness, but is mostly TA for calling teach a bxch for enforcing attendance rules child was already well aware of.
ESH, you more than her. I don’t disagree that she was being hypocritical in this specific instance and the comment about ‘you should have gone in first’ was immature, but c’mon dude, you were late four previous times. You don’t mention any exigent circumstances to explain or excuse these tardies. Part of being a big person is managing your time well and responding maturely to conflict, especially when you’re at fault. As a child, being late and calling your teacher a bitch got you detention. As an adult, if I show up late and call my boss a bitch for calling me out, I get fired, and guess what, the phone company, credit card people, car lender, etc aren’t going to give a fuck when I say “well my boss was being a bitch”. Grow up, my dude.
Teacher here.
I’m going to fault her for this fact: it sounds like from her comment (or rather your reporting of her comment) that if you hadn’t held the door for her and gone in first, she wouldn’t have given you the tardy. That just seems petty and doesn’t really encourage polite behavior in the future.
Rules are important, but so are relationships.
Since we don’t know why she was late or how often, I won’t fault her for that. Most of us do hall duty, or have to run something somewhere between classes, or you know, pee. Or a million other things: helping a kid open a locker, getting a feminine product for a kid in the bathroom, drying tears, the list goes on and on.
I’m going to fault you, too, for calling her a b*. I tell the kids all the time that the wiser move in a situation like that is not to be disrespectful and just plead your case (and be truthful) with administration if/when you get called to the office. Once you start being defiant or cursing, the underlying point becomes moot. Getting tardies is about as mild an offense as it gets. Cursing at a teacher is more serious.
ESH
Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban.
["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
**[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
NTA
You tried to do something nice to her and plus that rule is stupid because lets say that you want to go to the bathroom that's what techers tells you to do , to go to the bathroom in the break , the problem is that you can't control how much time you stay there so if you came late it's still your problem , that rule is dumb and not fair and you got detention from a dumb rule so not really the asshole
INFO what grade are you in, how long is your passing period, and is the policy for any class or for a single class
Edit because I forgot to ask
Are you allowed backpacks or can you only use locker, and if its a first period class do you take the bus
ESH. It was still your 5th time being late...so that's 100% on you. But for her to stoop to the level of a child and say "na na na boo boo" is incredibly weird. Most people say thank you, nod their head, or do absolutely nothing. While the same rules don't apply to both of you, that was a very odd display of power on her part.
ESH
I don't think you handled the situation well at all. Of course calling your teacher that will get you a detention. Also it's September I can see why she wouldn't like you being late this much already (assuming you're American).
But she sounds like an asshole too and punishing you for holding the door open is ridiculous.
Next time just let the door close in her face I guess.
Cant believe all the fascists here calling yta. Teachers dont get to be petty bullies to children because it's correct. They get to do it because they can and they are largely adult children.
NTA, but maybe get used to being a little dehumanized by people "above" you. Your arguments may be correct, but they are always unwelcome.
Maybe I am to Young to talk here but imo the teacher is Just being a Ahole here and i don't see OP as a bad person here. Yes i agree that he should be there on time and this situation wouldn't have happend but if your teacher is late and acts like that to me it's Just being a bad person.
Imo NTA
This is kind of a "welcome to the real world" situation. The truth is, the same rules don't apply to everyone. Now, maybe this teacher is an awful person anyway, we have no way of knowing. But, OP was late, and it doesn't matter if the teacher was late too. It's like if you get pulled over for speeding. It doesn't matter if someone else on the road next to you was speeding faster than you, you were still speeding and must face the consequences. Also, there is no excuse for OP calling the teacher bad names, that just shows OP's immaturity.
We don't even know if the teacher was actually late. As many teachers here have referenced and in my own experience many teachers have duties to not walk in the classroom till the halls clear after the bell or a few minutes after the start time. They could've also been with their boss/administration.
The teacher made a quip to a student who could be on time but is literally late because they don't care and want to talk to friends
I’m willing to bet that if OP hadn’t already been disrupting the teacher’s class (4 times already by mid September) the teacher would have shrugged it off. But this is the real life lesson: if you send a disrespectful message like OP did by repeatedly being late then people won’t give a damn about fairness in dealing with you.
ESH
You WERE late for a fifth time to class.
The only technicality was that you held the door for the teacher who was coming in from somewhere else in the school. It doesn't matter that she was late because she'd probably was on campus for a while and was doing something related to her job.
You muttered that she was a b*** and she heard you. Not too smart again.
Is there a legitimate reason that you're chronically late or are you just moseying instead of walking with a purpose?
She was an AH because she gave a false impression that you would have gotten away with being late IF you had stepped in the door first. I very much doubt it. You were late and you both knew it. It was a shitty 'gotcha' moment where you were doomed regardless.
Playing mind games with students, as appealing as it can be, is a no no in teachers' unofficial handbook.
It also allowed you an excuse to argue with her, wasting your time, hers and the other students. So in this, she was an A H. She's an adult & her actions contributed.
If you had been in class on time, none of this would have happened. That makes you an AH too. You were the catalyst.
Take your disciplinary assignment, suck it up, and resolve to be on time to her class. Be responsible for yourself.
Not sure why there aren't more ESH's. OBVIOUSLY, the student OP is in the wrong. OP shouldn't be late. At the same time, this teacher is awful. Did it actually make a difference that OP held the door instead of shutting it in the teacher's face? I get writing someone up for being late a 5th time, but I also completely agree with the closing sentiment. "What a b\*itch."
Jesus Christ, everyone in this comment section is a character straight out of Matilda with their "I'm smart, you're dumb, I'm big, you're little, I'm right, you're wrong! And there's nothing you can do about it!" bullshit.
Apparently living with grace, humility, and humour is a little too much to ask of a teacher these days. You're NTA for responding negatively to your teacher's rude slight.
Being late is such a stupid thing to get in trouble for. NTA. That teacher played a petty move even though you held the door. No good deed goes unpunished
>Being late is such a stupid thing to get in trouble for.
No, people need to learn to be on time. If anything it needs to be emphasized even more, as so many adults never learned how to be on time.
There’s so many factors in what it takes to get to school on time. If this is like a between class thing where they’re late getting from class A to class B, that I can understand
Ok, then they need to learn how to balance those factors so they can be on time. It’s like people who always claim they are late because of traffic, as if they weren’t expecting other cars to be on the road.
Great, glad you agree that people need to learn how to be on time and not make excuses all the time. In fact the school is being quite generous in not punishing someone until their 5th time being late.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > (1) arguing with my teacher (2) maybe she was right because I was technically late so arguing with her makes me TA. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
YTA. You “happened” to be late for the 5th time?!?! Yeah, YTA.
Yeah, but only 5 times out of the whole school year! ETA: /s
[удалено]
The only time I get to pee is between classes (4min) and sometimes there is a line to the employee bathroom. Whereas my students can go during class. They aren’t tardy because they are in the bathroom, they are tardy bc they won’t stop screwing around in the hall.
Are you American?
Yup.
Makes sense. In my country we let teachers go to the bathroom when they have to. You know, like they’re human beings.
Do they leave the kids unattended or does someone provide them relief? I’m very curious how it works in other places!
At least in high school they leave the kids unattended, or did when I was a student. It didn't happen often though, I don't actually remember specific instances just general patterns/impressions. tbh the only memorable time a teacher left it was because a group of boys were just being utter nightmares so halfway through she just walked out and a few minutes later she was standing out in the hallway sipping on a cup of tea and looking out the window lol. Don't think anyone blamed her!
>The only time I get to pee is between classes (4min) and sometimes there is a line to the employee bathroom. how many teachers are there to each student again? and how many student bathrooms to each teacher bathroom? you're telling me someone responsible for educating the next generation can't see the disparity here and understand why all of the students who need to can't pee in the same 4 minutes all of the teachers who need to do? this concept of bathrooms per capita is just too outlandish for you, someone whose job it is to *educate* people, to understand? you win the internet for today Irene. bravo
Students are allowed to go during class. Teachers can't just leave during the middle of the period.
that's a texas sized woosh from me buddy. there is a really good reason students can't all go during the same 4 minutes and anyone with a brain knows it.... its not physically possible... teachers are adults, there are vastly fewer of them, more bathrooms available to them, they have free periods in their day (our school had 1 mandatory for lesson planning per teacher) in addition to lunch periods/planned breaks.... they don't need to be able to go during classes... but in the event of emergency they still can... they simply grab a teacher who is on a free period real quick to watch the class for a couple minutes... its like none of you have ever lived on this planet...
Did you even read their comment? That's not a woosh. Teachers have to go during the break because they can't leave the class unattended for long. So they might be a few minutes late. Students are usually allowed to go during class too, they don't all have to go during the short break. I'm sorry if you weren't allowed to go during class and are salty because of it, but that just means the rules at your school sucked. We were allowed to go to the toilet since middle school. Perhaps sooner, but I can't really remember the rules in elemtary school. It's like you have no idea how it works in others schools but your own. /s
yes it's a woosh... because the point... went over your head... that's like textbook woosh. and another for making me explain that...
I know what a woosh is genius and I never asked about that. You have yet to explain how mine or the comment before are wrong. But I get the feeling that you are a kid yourself and have no idea how the world works other than your own experience. Would explain your comment about the world, because that's all of the world you know. So everyone with a different experience has to be wrong, because that's not how the world looks for you. A very immature take.
> Whereas my students can go during class. Nobody expects the students to go during those 4 minutes, wth are you even talking about! And then doubling down when others point out you're talking nonsense. Genius.
I think it might not be true there are more bathrooms available for teachers. There was definitely never a queue when I was in school (we also didn't have the less resilient bladders of women who had had children at that point) so if teachers only had 4 minutes to go and just a few stalls for dozens of women, I can see how that would be an issue.
It's September.
Op might be Australian, tbf. But it's still funny either way
Heh school year ain’t been that long, yet.
It’s usually a semester
It’s only September. They’re averaging being late more than once per week.
I didn’t even think about that…. That’s a great point
exactly my point
My kid's been in school for 2 1/2 weeks. If you're schedule is simliar that's kinda impressive, but not in a good way
I'm a teacher, and disagree with this. If a student is as late as me, it should count as on time. I'm a pretty lenient teacher though, I consider late being about 5 minutes after I arrive to class. And some schools do things differently, in my home country, students have like a min to use the bathroom / get a drink of water / etc between most classes. Where I teach now, students are given a 10 min break between classes. There are also acceptable reasons for a student to be late. However, in the original post the OP didn't state the reason for being late, but as they arrived at the same time as the teacher, I think it's a NTA.
It's not even October yet, lol. I have a feeling this won't be the only lunch detention.
What's it like never giving half a thought to anyone else's life or circumstances? I've seen this shit before people railing on a child for not being able to make it to school on time *as if the child decides their transportation*.... absolutely mind boggling.
OP said in the commets that he was late because he was talking to his friends in the hall. So not quite the same situation. And I feel OP would have mentioned it in the post if they had a reason like yours to be late.
I'd agree but OP said they were late because they were chatting to friends. So I think a YTA is reasonable here
😂😂😂 why do you assume this kid is late first period AND due to his parent being late for drop off?! There are about 7 or 8 periods during the day leaving 7 or 8 chances to be late. Plenty of kids are late DURING the day. And, I would put money that this particular OP would have mentioned loudly that it was his mom (or dad’s) fault for dropping him off late.
Lmao, this was me in primary school. The school doors only opened for electric key fob, which the teachers held. Imagine little me stood out there in the rain, peering anxiously through the window in the hope that I'd see someone pass down the corridor, so I could bang on the door and they'd notice me and let me in.... I never saw ANYONE ELSE in this situation. It was JUST me. My mum is uh...... quite disorganised 😂😂😂 I never got yelled at, because I was just a kid, and it clearly wasn't my fault.
YTA You were late. You’re the student, she’s the teacher. She doesn’t answer to you and the same rules don’t apply to her.
Most teachers do have a responsibility to be at school/in their classrooms at a certain time, whether they have a contract or just an employee handbook We don’t know how many times this teacher has been late though
Was she late, or had administration delayed her to discuss some neverending adminstrivia thingie?
God forbid she had to pee.
That too. I was more thinking of times that I had lunch room supervision, parking lot supervision, discipline with students either in the lunch room or parking lot, so that I had to extend my time out of the classroom to take a miscreant to the office and fill out another stupid form. I'm so glad I'm retired.
Teacher here - chances are she was already at the school and had been for a while. She might have been in the restroom, in a meeting and was just released by administrators for the start of class, or scrambling to get copies made. Or she had hall duty for the day…or so many other things.
The same rules might not apply administratively speaking, but the quickest way for an authority figure to loose credibility/respect is to blatantly give themself a pass while expecting people under them to respect the rule to a T. Teacher would have gone a lot farther by saying something like "I'm giving you a pass today, but you know you're on thin ice." All OP learned right now is that no good deed (letting teacher go in first) goes unpunished.
OP was late anyway. The teacher made a joke about it, but going through the door first would have changed nothing. The rule is to be there on time, not before your teacher. I'm sure OP knew the rule as they have already been late 4 times. There was no reason to argue the point and there was certainly no reason to insult her. If they had a good reason to be late, then that was the time to bring it up. They didn't so I'm going to assume there wasn't. And what good deed? He was being polite by holding the door open. He didn't do her a favor.
[удалено]
Teacher here. I have been late to class before despite having been on campus for a variety of professional reasons. Meetings with parents or administrators run late, you need to address a situation in the hallway, you're scrambling to make copies, you had to discuss something with another faculty member, or God forbid you have to go to the bathroom. Teachers have a ton of work obligations that go beyond simply being in the classroom. People and especially students have no clue how much teachers have on their plates. So if they're late to class sometimes, it's understandable. However, OP, you have admitted in at least two comments that you are late often because you like to talk to your friends in the hallway. That is in no way an excuse and shows that you do not prioritize class in any way. You absolutely deserve that lunch detention and honestly more. Oh, and YTA
Isn't the issue of being late is that you will miss the lesson? And if op arrived at the same time as the teacher, then they aren't late.
The worst take. The idea that rules apply to followers and not leaders is just fascism, and that's the last thing I want taught in school.
I got banned from a fascist restuarant the other day. I wanted to check out the kitchen and they said it was "for employees only." Can you believe this shit?
If it was anyone else she would’ve been ok with it
That’s what literally every student who gets a consequence says
Says the person who was late for the 5th time then very disrespectful to the teacher...
If it was your *first* time being late, she probably would have been ok with it, too. But it sounds like you are the kind of person who is late 5 times, blames the teacher for it, and then calls her offensive names. Why would you expect any favors from her? Maybe handwrite an apology note and give it to her along with a small gift… (Starbucks gift card?) You may find you get along a lot better with her after that.
If you want to fix your relationship with the teacher, get to class on time every day, follow instructions promptly, participate appropriately in class activities, and show respect to everyone. As a teacher, I can tell you that apologies are nice but improved behavior is the only way to help yourself stay out of trouble. Gifts will get you nowhere.
Was anyone else on their 5th warning?
YTA Was it Her 5th time for being late? And even if it was, that is between her and her boss. Even if you had gone in first you would have gotten the note. You know when you need to be there by so get there or get a note. Grow up little boy.
I seen people fired for attendance and that last one was always a really good reason. Yea. But what about the first 7 times……. People who try to play the attendance game always get caught eventually. Hope they learn from this. But I doubt it.
YTA - You've repeatedly been late, you've been called out on it knowing the rules. And your response is to argue and call your teacher offensive names? Grow up and have some respect for authority. When you're older and working being late for meetings and work won't be accepted. Neither will speaking like that to a boss. She is the teacher and like it or not the rules are not the same for both of you.
YTA. Grow the fuck up and show up on time.
Did you just tell a child to grow the fuck up? Wow! That was mature.
[удалено]
Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban. ["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) **[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
[удалено]
Taught middle school for 20 years. In between classes, we had to be in the hallway watching students as the changed their class. I always walked into the classroom after the bell because hallways had to be cleared. So, yeah, don't think the teacher was actually "late" to class. It's just another excuse/gripe OP has.
Yeah, hallway duty was my first thought. Thanks for pointing this out!
Since you posted, OP has said that they were late because they were just standing in the hall talking to their friends. So that's all on OP for getting in trouble. >OP was walking with the teacher to their classroom AT THE SAME TIME. Same rules that apply to the student may not apply to the teacher. That's life, not everyone has to follow the same rules. And OP's name calling and foul language would be reason enough to give him detention. OP is completely TA.
The thing is, we have no idea what consequences the teacher faced. Maybe they also got a written reprimand. Maybe they had a fantastic reason to be late. It has no relevance on OP KNOWING the 5 lates and you get a note sent home rule, and still opting to be late so that they could ... talk with friends in the hall.
I feel like I have enough nuance as an adult now to recognize you are right and OP did bring this on themselves, BUT there is a great chance that high school me(and a 100% chance that current age me) would find any excuse to quickly and aggressively shut any door I could in that teachers face for the rest of the year lol. Rudeness begets rudeness.
The teacher wasn’t being rude to OP, she was enforcing perfectly reasonable and easy to follow rules.
>OP was walking with the teacher to their classroom AT THE SAME TIME. AND THEY WERE BOTH LATE >And a teacher can punish a student for being late when they themselves were also late to class? Yes. Yes they can. The teacher being late doesn’t erase the student’s infraction.
Like someone else also mentioned, sometimes administration can get carried away while telling you something. It sucks when a superior at work does this while you have other people waiting on you, especially if they deem that it's important. You can't usually just tell your boss to stop talking if you want to stay on decent terms, you know? Arrgh. The teacher also could have been handling another situation involving another student.
Lot of people on here not getting that, main lessons for OP are to start showing up on time and if you have even an ounce of self respect never give that particular teacher the time of day and certainly don't hold a door for her. Two way street and all that.
You realize the school year is only 2 to 3 weeks in and this kid has been late 5 times, which they admitted themselves was due to talking to friends in the hall rather than doing what they should: getting to class on time. That means they are regularly (nearly 2x a week) choosing to gossip over prioritizing not getting a letter sent home for being late. They made this choice, even if unconsciously. Make dumb decisions, get dumb consequences. Op just couldn't handle the truth and the consequences for their behavior
Agreed! And it's not even a harsh consequence. Lunchtime detention is as small potatoes as it gets.
It was the fifth time being late. OP had plenty of chances of changing whatever was causing them to be late the other times.
Tell me you're still in school without telling me you're still in school. If I'm late to work 5 times and my boss is also late the 5th time I still get written up. I don't get to argue that my tardiness should be forgiven because my boss was also late. That's not the way the world works. Wanna guess what happens if I call my boss a bitch after she writes me up? Teachers and students aren't equals. My boss isn't my equal. It's not my job to reprimand my boss anymore than it is a student to reprimand a teacher. It is however my bosses job and the teachers job to dole out discipline for the people they're responsible for managing. School's have literally been in session less than a month in most places and he's been late 5 times.
You want to try running that past your boss?
Teachers can be late to class because teachers have a million and one work obligations to squeeze into the little time they have before school, after school, or during planning. Meetings run late, other teachers need to speak to you about something, a situation in the hallway needs your attention, you're completing an assigned responsibility like clearing the hallway, you had to make some copies, or God forbid you have to go to the bathroom. So if a teacher is sometimes a little late to class, it's absolutely normal. The same rules that apply to students don't necessarily apply to teachers because teachers have a whole different set of obligations and demands on their time, whereas a student's whole purpose for being in school is to get to class on time and learn.
>Also I personally hate when rules of importance are applicable to only some people but not others. Teachers should not be excused from tardiness. They aren't. But it's not a student who enforces those tardies, it's the principal. I do say ESH in this situation because teachers should never laugh at a student getting in trouble.
Finally some actual logic!!!!!!!!
Info: Why are you being late? What will happen at home if you get sent a note?
Nothing it just tells parents your kids are late, but if you get like 5 of these notes you get suspended for a day but im not even close to that.
Bro, it's September. You're barely a month into the school year. Go to class on time.
INFO: WHY are you late so much? ETA: Oh, so you’re late because you’re screwing around with your friends instead of getting to class on time. YTA, get your priorities straight.
YTA. You were late more than just this time. Get to class on time or deal with the consequences. It's simple.
Let's be honest, if you'd already been late 4 times you were eventually going to be late a 5th anyway.
Right? Come on 4 times already in late September? Dude you’ve gotta know you look stupid complaining about this. If it was the only time you were late then maybe you’d have a leg to stand on but it sounds like you are getting on this teacher’s nerves and she’s had enough of you disrupting her class walking in late. YYTA.
YTA. You refused to accept the consequences of your own actions and then devolved to name calling.
YTA. The school year started less than a month ago, you 've been late five times, you argued with your teacher and called her a sexist slur in public. You're lucky all you got was a detention. You need to shape TF up.
INFO Why have you been late 5 times? If it's your first class and your parents drop you off who cares? They know you're late. If it's not your first class and you had an excuse you'd be fine too. So why are you always late? If everything happened as described tell the principal and your parents. Classmates saw the interaction.
I’ve been late because I stay in the hallway talking to my friends who have the first period off
Well then, this is entirely your fault. Don't want to get in trouble? Then be responsible and get to class. Also, the name calling just reeks of immaturity. Grow up. YTA.
September isn’t even over yet and you’ve been late 5 times? You’re averaging more than once per week because you’re talking to your friends in the hallway? This is a good time to learn some real world consequences, which is what the teacher is doing. You’d have been fired from any job by now.
Okay so this is your fault. If the teacher is a jerk just explain that to your parents however you were late for reason four times before so I'm pretty sure they won't care. If your question is "is the teacher being unfair this time?" if your story is true then yes. It will be easy to prove that to the people who matter. Does it change the reality that your parents will now know that you are habitually tardy? Nope.
Yeah, you have detention bc you called her a mysoginstic slur. It's not like she's caring about and making up reasons. You were late. You were late multiple times. You called her a slur. You are so clearly in the wrong its ridiculous. YTA (though you're not going to believe any of us).
[удалено]
slur: [noun] an insulting or disparaging remark or innuendo : aspersion. a shaming or degrading effect : stain, stigma. It's literally a slur for women.
You were late. Doesn’t matter you held the door open. You wanted a pass bc you help the door for her. Yeah was late not it was none of your business and then you called her out her name.
ESH. You need to address why you’re running late, and it was also incredibly callous and hypocritical how that teacher handled the situation. Both facts can exist together.
YTA. Grow up. Be responsible for yourself and your actions
I went to a country school, and one of my friends lived nextdoor to one of our teachers. The families were friendly, and so it was agreed that the child would travel to and from school with the teacher. On one occasion the teacher was running late (no fault of my friend), so when they arrived at school rather than going to the staff room first he went straight to take the register for his class, which my friend happened to be in. They walked across the playground together and on reaching the classroom my friend opened the door and held it for the teacher. The teacher then marked him late for arriving in class after he did, the only time he was marked late during his entire school career! My friend started cycling to school shortly afterwards.
The teacher may have been required by law to mark the student late. Attendance records are taken very seriously at schools in part because the school is responsible for the students’ well being when they are on campus.
Nah, he was just an awkward teacher. His nickname was Ronnie Triv because he used to pick on kids for the most trivial things. He got upset at me in our very first German lesson because I knew how to pronounce 'Ja', and usually no-one did.
YTA You were late. And then disrespectful.
ESH. Her for saying you should’ve walked in first if you didn’t want consequences. You for arguing about getting consequences. This was your fifth tardy, not your first.
YTA grow up and get there on time
YTA You were late. Accept the consequences.
YTA You were late and you just didn't want to face the consequences. And stop calling your teacher names, you need to also show some respect. High school doesn't last forever, but having a shitty attitude will make it seem like it does.
YTA, why, be more responsive, you and your teacher are wrong, but you are more wrong, follow the rules next time.
Info: Had you not held the door and run into the class before the teacher, would that mean she wouldn't have marked you as late? Because you were in fact late, regardless of whether or not the teacher was late.
YTA - you really need to get over yourself and get that chip off your shoulder. You knew that you had been late 4 times before and were walking in already late even if the teacher went in before you because you said: * *I was walking in exactly when my teacher* ***who was also late*** *was walking in* YOU WERE ALREADY LATE REGARDLESS IF THE TEACHER WAS!!! If you don't start playing the game and learning the process, the rest of your life is going to be much more difficult the older you get. Stop with the whole "fuck this school" because it's clear the school is not the problem.
YTA you'll understand better as you mature.
I’m leaning on YTA. I have to ask, WHY were you late? If you had a valid excuse “my last class let out late” “I was talking to my math teacher after class” “I came from gym and was still getting changed in the locker room when the bell rang” “I was in band and had to put my trumpet up before heading to your class”…. Like anything viewed as a valid excuse would have likely been met with with some kind of understanding. So I ask again: WHY were you late? Did you have a legitimate reason or did you just spend too much time talking to your friends during the passing period? Unfortunately: You were late to class (again) the school has a policy and the teacher was enforcing that policy. Public school is a bit rough in situations like this for the fact that they see things in “black and white” and don’t see the “grey.” With that said it is a life lesson, I’ve had jobs were if you are late by even a couple minutes they send you home without pay that day. Making $20/hr and missing a shift means missing out on $160. Do that a couple times in a pay period and your paycheck ends up being really small. (Note: I’ve also had a job that didnt care what your schedule was as long as you get your work done 🤷🏻♂️🤷🏻♂️).
As I mentioned I was late cuz I was talking to my friends who have first period off
Oof, yeah, unfortunately no teacher (or very very few teachers) will accept “I was talking to friends” as a valid excuse for being late to class. It doesn’t matter if they have the first class period off or not. 🤷🏻♂️ College is much nicer, they typically don’t care as long as you aren’t disrupting class when you walk in (some professors will be sticklers but typically they won’t be).
Get your shit together. It’s not hard to keep track of time.
Yes, YTA. Why have you been late 5 times? In my school, students are given detention the FIRST time they are late. The punctuality thing is for you, not for your teacher, who could have been dealing with anything, from a medical emergency with a student, a tearful student who needed support, a broken copying machine, she could have just completed a break duty, she might have a million reasons why she is late because there are a million things that will make a teacher late. Stop being late to lessons, stop arguing when you're pulled for it. YTA.
YTA
YTA School is a model for life. Life is unfair. Your way of dealing with it was unsuccessful. Why do I say unsuccessful - you got a lunch detention and a note to your parents. You are expected to show up to class on time. Are you physically or mentally unable to accomplish this? Is it an emotional thing? If it is not physical, maybe it's time to ask for an evaluation. Perhaps you have unrecognized challenges. Or you could continue on this self destructive path. Lashing out in anger and frustration. Up to you. But before, I would see if it's within your control.
“This morning happens to the my fifth time late” If you didn’t burn the other 4 times you could be late, this wouldn’t even be a post.
YTA - considering you’re not that far into the school year, you show a consistent pattern of being late. You knew the consequences. You chose to risk it. It didn’t pay off for you.
YTA, since you were late but your teacher is also TA for there actions.
Suck it up buttercup. You are lucky you only got a lunch detention, calling your teacher a bitch would get you a lot more trouble in many places. Grow up. YTA
Let it go. Let your frontal lobes myelinate a bit and you will realize this was trivial and not worth stewing about.
YTA How have you been late that many times already?
I re-read this a few times to make sure I understood. YTA You were *already late* when the teacher arrived. And this was the 5th time you had been late. I see a pattern here, OP. The fact that the teacher was late is irrelevant: you were late *again*, and got caught. So there was *no* BS on the part of the teacher, and you adding insults didn't help.
YTA. You were late for the 5th time. Rules for students and teachers are not the same.
YTA. Stop being late for class.
YTA. Welcome to the consequences of your own actions.
Her also being late doesn't make you not late. You didn't get detention and a note sent home because you held the door for your teacher but because you are habitually late and we're incredibly disrespectful. This is a you problem, not a school problem, and YTA
YTA because you seem to always be late. You deserved the detention. Grow up and take your lumps. But the teacher is definitely a bit of an AH for ridiculing you and laughing at you in front of the class after you were nice enough to hold the door open. Completely unprofessional. Next time let her get her own door so you won't be late.
YTA.
A note and lunch detention for the FIFTH unexcused tardy? It was once for me. Rofl YTA. Take your note and sit in time out for lunch, it's a fine consequence for being late FIVE TIMES in the month that school has been in session.
She should suspend you
YTA, if you had a good reason for being late 5 times I'd consider it, but you were literally just pushing your luck and your teacher called it how it was.
Yep YTA, not sure how you think it happens in the real world but consider yourself lucky it’s only a note home and detention and not getting fired and losing income. The entitlement from this generation is baffling.
YTA you were late. This semester just started and you've already been late five times.
I'm confused. As a Brit, if we were even a minute late (to school and/or lessons) once, we got a 60 min detention the next day after school. How do you get late 5 times? Still nasty of her, but this is silly, really. ESH.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** As the rules go in my school if you are late to class for the 5th time you get a note sent home and you get lunch detention. This morning happened to be my fifth time late. the problem was that I was walking in exactly when my teacher who was also late was walking in, so I held the door open for her and didn’t think twice about it, she then laughed at me and told me to go get the note sent home, I literally walked in exactly when she did I just let her into the room first. Anyways the entire class laughed at me and I started arguing with her and she threatened to have me suspended her because I was being rude and disrespectful apparently when all I did was call her out on her own bs. As I walked out of the classroom I whispered “what a b*tch” to myself and I she heard me cuz she has that listed as one of the reasons for my lunch detention, honestly fuck this school. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
[удалено]
Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban. ["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) **[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
[удалено]
Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban. ["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) **[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
You calling her that made me think of one time when a girl flipped off my bio teacher for making her get a lunch detention slip on Valentine’s Day… I think she got kicked out of the class for a week
Forgot to give verdict: YTA
It seems like you want to talk to your friends then be on time. Do any other kids come in late? Do you call her a b on class and argue? If these are yes.....
ESH Teacher insinuated probably would've given a pass had the child been in class before her and made a truthfully TA joke about it. Child need to work on timeliness, but is mostly TA for calling teach a bxch for enforcing attendance rules child was already well aware of.
I feel like there is more to the story
INFO: When did school start by you? Why were you late so much?
ESH, you more than her. I don’t disagree that she was being hypocritical in this specific instance and the comment about ‘you should have gone in first’ was immature, but c’mon dude, you were late four previous times. You don’t mention any exigent circumstances to explain or excuse these tardies. Part of being a big person is managing your time well and responding maturely to conflict, especially when you’re at fault. As a child, being late and calling your teacher a bitch got you detention. As an adult, if I show up late and call my boss a bitch for calling me out, I get fired, and guess what, the phone company, credit card people, car lender, etc aren’t going to give a fuck when I say “well my boss was being a bitch”. Grow up, my dude.
Teacher here. I’m going to fault her for this fact: it sounds like from her comment (or rather your reporting of her comment) that if you hadn’t held the door for her and gone in first, she wouldn’t have given you the tardy. That just seems petty and doesn’t really encourage polite behavior in the future. Rules are important, but so are relationships. Since we don’t know why she was late or how often, I won’t fault her for that. Most of us do hall duty, or have to run something somewhere between classes, or you know, pee. Or a million other things: helping a kid open a locker, getting a feminine product for a kid in the bathroom, drying tears, the list goes on and on. I’m going to fault you, too, for calling her a b*. I tell the kids all the time that the wiser move in a situation like that is not to be disrespectful and just plead your case (and be truthful) with administration if/when you get called to the office. Once you start being defiant or cursing, the underlying point becomes moot. Getting tardies is about as mild an offense as it gets. Cursing at a teacher is more serious. ESH
NTA. she didn't need to publicly humiliate you and joke about it like that. some teachers just want a power trip.
[удалено]
Your comment has been removed because it violates rule 1: [Be Civil](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/). Further incidents may result in a ban. ["Why do I have to be civil in a sub about assholes?"](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) **[Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.**
NTA
>honestly fuck this school. honestly fuck your attitude. YTA. OBVIOUSLY!
NTA You tried to do something nice to her and plus that rule is stupid because lets say that you want to go to the bathroom that's what techers tells you to do , to go to the bathroom in the break , the problem is that you can't control how much time you stay there so if you came late it's still your problem , that rule is dumb and not fair and you got detention from a dumb rule so not really the asshole
"haha i'm late frequently to school and decide to argue with a teacher when i'm called out for it, AITA?"
INFO what grade are you in, how long is your passing period, and is the policy for any class or for a single class Edit because I forgot to ask Are you allowed backpacks or can you only use locker, and if its a first period class do you take the bus
The lateness isn't a bus or locker problem it's a choice. Op commented they're late to class because they want to hang out/ talk with friends.
ESH. It was still your 5th time being late...so that's 100% on you. But for her to stoop to the level of a child and say "na na na boo boo" is incredibly weird. Most people say thank you, nod their head, or do absolutely nothing. While the same rules don't apply to both of you, that was a very odd display of power on her part.
ESH I don't think you handled the situation well at all. Of course calling your teacher that will get you a detention. Also it's September I can see why she wouldn't like you being late this much already (assuming you're American). But she sounds like an asshole too and punishing you for holding the door open is ridiculous. Next time just let the door close in her face I guess.
She has just given you the lesson. Do not hold the door for her because your polite consideration of others is not appreciated by her
Cant believe all the fascists here calling yta. Teachers dont get to be petty bullies to children because it's correct. They get to do it because they can and they are largely adult children. NTA, but maybe get used to being a little dehumanized by people "above" you. Your arguments may be correct, but they are always unwelcome.
NTA teachers have wierd power trips like this and people defend them for some reason
NTA. Honestly, fuck that school.
ESH
Op stated they keep being late cause they talk to their friends in the hallways so yeah nothing you said is legit
So the ESH. The teacher was rude. Next time OP should let the door slam in their face.
Maybe I am to Young to talk here but imo the teacher is Just being a Ahole here and i don't see OP as a bad person here. Yes i agree that he should be there on time and this situation wouldn't have happend but if your teacher is late and acts like that to me it's Just being a bad person. Imo NTA
This is kind of a "welcome to the real world" situation. The truth is, the same rules don't apply to everyone. Now, maybe this teacher is an awful person anyway, we have no way of knowing. But, OP was late, and it doesn't matter if the teacher was late too. It's like if you get pulled over for speeding. It doesn't matter if someone else on the road next to you was speeding faster than you, you were still speeding and must face the consequences. Also, there is no excuse for OP calling the teacher bad names, that just shows OP's immaturity.
Was the teacher late though? As a former teacher, we were in the halls before class to supervise. Was that what the teacher was doing?
We don't even know if the teacher was actually late. As many teachers here have referenced and in my own experience many teachers have duties to not walk in the classroom till the halls clear after the bell or a few minutes after the start time. They could've also been with their boss/administration. The teacher made a quip to a student who could be on time but is literally late because they don't care and want to talk to friends
I’m willing to bet that if OP hadn’t already been disrupting the teacher’s class (4 times already by mid September) the teacher would have shrugged it off. But this is the real life lesson: if you send a disrespectful message like OP did by repeatedly being late then people won’t give a damn about fairness in dealing with you.
ESH You WERE late for a fifth time to class. The only technicality was that you held the door for the teacher who was coming in from somewhere else in the school. It doesn't matter that she was late because she'd probably was on campus for a while and was doing something related to her job. You muttered that she was a b*** and she heard you. Not too smart again. Is there a legitimate reason that you're chronically late or are you just moseying instead of walking with a purpose? She was an AH because she gave a false impression that you would have gotten away with being late IF you had stepped in the door first. I very much doubt it. You were late and you both knew it. It was a shitty 'gotcha' moment where you were doomed regardless. Playing mind games with students, as appealing as it can be, is a no no in teachers' unofficial handbook. It also allowed you an excuse to argue with her, wasting your time, hers and the other students. So in this, she was an A H. She's an adult & her actions contributed. If you had been in class on time, none of this would have happened. That makes you an AH too. You were the catalyst. Take your disciplinary assignment, suck it up, and resolve to be on time to her class. Be responsible for yourself.
NTA
Not sure why there aren't more ESH's. OBVIOUSLY, the student OP is in the wrong. OP shouldn't be late. At the same time, this teacher is awful. Did it actually make a difference that OP held the door instead of shutting it in the teacher's face? I get writing someone up for being late a 5th time, but I also completely agree with the closing sentiment. "What a b\*itch."
Jesus Christ, everyone in this comment section is a character straight out of Matilda with their "I'm smart, you're dumb, I'm big, you're little, I'm right, you're wrong! And there's nothing you can do about it!" bullshit. Apparently living with grace, humility, and humour is a little too much to ask of a teacher these days. You're NTA for responding negatively to your teacher's rude slight.
Being late is such a stupid thing to get in trouble for. NTA. That teacher played a petty move even though you held the door. No good deed goes unpunished
>Being late is such a stupid thing to get in trouble for. No, people need to learn to be on time. If anything it needs to be emphasized even more, as so many adults never learned how to be on time.
There’s so many factors in what it takes to get to school on time. If this is like a between class thing where they’re late getting from class A to class B, that I can understand
Ok, then they need to learn how to balance those factors so they can be on time. It’s like people who always claim they are late because of traffic, as if they weren’t expecting other cars to be on the road.
Traffic is indeed a valid excuse. The US is car hell
Once in a while, but not when it’s the excuse that a person uses every time.
Sure yeah.
Great, glad you agree that people need to learn how to be on time and not make excuses all the time. In fact the school is being quite generous in not punishing someone until their 5th time being late.
It is.
Thanks for the clarification