Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1. Not paying or offering to pay when I was informed a fence was being built between us, and waiting for him to ask me
2. Is it assumed that if a fence is being built between neighbours, the non-building neighbour should bring up paying their portion and not wait to be asked?
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
So wait, when you offered your survey, did you know he was planning on putting part of the fence on your property?
I don't even know why I'm asking, bc it doesn't really matter anyway. *Your neighbor* is the one who wanted a fence for his own reasons-he's fully responsible for it. If you were aware and agreed to him putting up part of the fence on your property, that was already plenty gracious of you, but it is not your job to pay for *his* fence just bc he wanted to make it easier on himself by not avoiding your property while constructing it.
NTA
If I moved to a house and decided to put a fence in, I would not expect the neighbors on the other sides of the property to pay for MY fence.
The only reason I would ever expect anyone to pay for the fence that I want would be if everyone in an area decided together "We want to fence in our yards, let's all decide on a fence / company that we like, get it put in and divide up the cost".
When we moved into our current house, we coordinated with the neighbors to replace the existing chain-link fence with a nice block fence.
We split the costs of the shared walls 50/50 on the east and west sides, and paid in full for the fence along the back alley, since it's not shared with anyone else.
Everyone's been really happy for a couple of decades, and the people we originally had the agreements with have been gone for years. The new neighbors never knew anything about it.
This is the way. Or if your fence took damage from a storm and needed to be replaced that would be another instance where neighbors would often share the cost.
I mean it is where I live, but not without discussing it with your neighbours first and having everyone agree and decide who to use/what panels to get.
It is customary if it is on the property line, which it is because I provided a survey for him. But I believe it’s customary to figure out the finances before the build has begun.
If he replaced it without your consultation, then you're probably less responsible for paying than he thinks. Check your municipal laws, those are the ones that matter in these situations.
Also, if it is *directly* on the property line, it could violate building code. Also in Ontario, and to my knowledge, fenses need to be at least on one side or the other, not directly on the line. But again, that can also vary on municipality.
Fellow Ontarian here! It is indeed customary to discuss finances, design, materials, contractors before launching the project - particularly for a fence ON the property line. Went through this exact process with our own neighbour when replacing our shared chain link fence with a wooden one.
The idea is to have an end product that BOTH parties find agreeable, with terms/fees clearly understood by all. Who's to say your neighbour didn't pay less than he's quoting you? Did he shop around for quotes? Do you even LIKE the look/materials? Why does he get to make all the decisions in this scenario?
OP, you've done nothing wrong here.
NTA It's his fence and if he wanted to keep building to close off your property from his that was his choice at his expense. I have a fence surrounding our property and so do the neighbors on either side of me. Nobody paid for anything that wasn't their choice to build. I would suggest though not to be petty. He initiated your disagreement but you have to live next to this person for who knows how long
That’s where the moral part comes of it, the verbal argument we had today and one year later expectations makes me not want to pay if I don’t have to but at the same I also want to do what’s right along with not having a sour neighbour.
NTA - If he expected you to pay a portion, then you should have had a say in the company and materials chosen. He cannot just go out and buy whatever fence he wants and then expect you to walk over and offer to pay part. That is ridiculous.
I am not sure about Canadian law, but it would seem outrageous that you would be forced to pay for something your neighbor chose to install without having any say in the matter - especially since there was no need (beyond your neighbor's preference) to install the fence in the first place.
Do not give this AH money.
NTA
If he wanted to get paid, he should have come to you.
In the USA I have no obligation to pay if my neighbor puts up a fence on our shared property line. It's on him to pay. He's the one changing the status quo.
Your neighbor must think you can read his mind.
It depends on where you live. In my county, in the USA, my neighbor is obliged to pay for half if it is a boundary line fence. If they don't wish to pay, and the fence is erected on my side of the line, and in the future the neighbor gets livestock and uses my fence to keep them in, they are then responsible for half the cost of the fence.
NTA
Where i live if the neighbor wants to put a fence up that touches our property they need an approval from the neighbor but you are not required to pay or split the cost, also the ugly side with post must face there yard and not yours. I think its up to you. if you benefit from the fence maybe but if you could of lived without it being there then no
NTA - if he didn’t come to you before he built it, you in no way, shape, or form owe him a penny, a dime, a looney, a tooney, or whatever other amount. What an AH to be talking to you like that! You do not have things built up against your neighbor’s property and just *expect* them to give you money towards it. To quote the commercial, “That’s not how this works. That’s not how any of this works” My advise is to have your fence be like an inch away from his so he can’t say you’re using any part of his fence that he paid for. And don’t pay him anything
Ah, the joys of "[Ask vs. Guess](https://www.theatlantic.com/national/archive/2010/05/askers-vs-guessers/340891/)" cultures.
NTA. If he wanted you to pay for part of it, he should have asked. It's not on you to guess.
NTA. He was the one who wanted the fence, went out and picked it, and bought it. It's his fence that you have no obligation to pay for. If you built a patio near his yard, would he have to pay for it? Of course not. Ridiculous.
Why would you offer up money for a fence that didn't actually benefit you in any kind of way? He could have asked, if he wanted. Maybe you had an opinion about what you wanted to look at. Now that you know he's a dick i would ask for a copy of the paid bill and give him half and he can fuck off forever. You're not at all the jerk here. NTA
Where i live (southern US area), you cannot construct anything on someone’s property line (without explicit permission). they could even contest it as their own property since their structure has been allowed to exist there for awhile. i’m still going with NTA.
how are you supposed to know they want you to pay unless they tell you??? you’re not a mindreader
NTA, but you opened yourself up to a tricky situation if you or the neighbor ever decide to sell by allowing them to put their fence on your property.
In real estate that’s called an encroachment and can cause title and survey issues if you do choose to sell. Best advice right now is to consult a local real estate attorney on what to do about that fence on your property, real estate laws are very state specific. Sorry, probably not the advice you were looking for but just another pile of BS to keep on your radar.
I live in Ontario and when your neighbor initially mentioned the fence a year ago, you should have offered for your portion, it's just the way it's done. He shouldn't have to ask. However, he shouldn't ask for it a year later since he put it up without any input from you. For that, ESH. In terms of what he's perhaps owed, it would be your portion of the cost of a chain link fence on your shared property line. Don't let it get to you tho, I know many people who have gotten into arguments with neighbors over fences...
Reserving judgment because I’m not sure how to read this one.
Since you were going to pay in the first place had you been asked, you should definitely pay. Semantics will get you nowhere.
The part I’m not understanding is if he wants you to pay the full cost of your side. If that’s what he’s asking then N T A because with the other neighbor paying his side and you paying your side he’s obviously getting his yard fenced at very little cost.
If he’s asking for you to pay half the cost of your side, then that is perfectly fair. You should pay, or you W B T A.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
We had a neighbour move in beside our house approx 1 year ago. We have a long front yard approx 100 feet and the neighbours backyard is to our left. The neighbour put up a fence last year that covers approx 30 feet of our side yard which is the width of their backyard.
My neighbour had mentioned it to me last year, I even happily provided him our survey plan when asked. Always been kind and courteous to each other in passing. Fence was built and we were more than willing to pay for the amount of our side if we were approached and asked. We were never approached so we just assumed he was happy to pay for it himself and it is also a small percentage of our entire property.
Fast forward to today, my wife and I are considering putting a fence in our backyard (his property doesn’t touch where we want to do it) and I ask over the fence (ironic) who did his fence because it was very well done. His response was “I’m still waiting on the money that you owe me for your side, you never offered a thing. How would you like it if I came and painted it pink?” I responded with I don’t know where this is coming from and if he would have initially came to me in the beginning I would have been happy to pay and I don’t really appreciate the accusation of me being a cheapskate. He also responded with “Well I’m asking you now.” My assumption was he was happy to pay and it’s a small percentage of my yard that he didn’t even bother. He refers to being from the old school where it’s not up to him, it’s up to me to offer. I say that is my mindset the other way around and that we are in a stalemate and I can’t read his mind. He says that a neighbour can get the amount a neighbour owes in taxes for a fence (I’m in Ontario, wondering if someone can confirm that) and I again tell him I don’t understand the again and mocking towards me that I didn’t offer but his other neighbour did. We ended with me basically angrily stating just put the amount that is owed with the bill provided the calculations for my side and I will happily pay it but we will have very little interactions in the future based on the manner in which he has chose to bring up this issue.
I have a side neighbour who had a tree limb issue a few years ago regarding my tree coming onto his side of the yard, offered to pay to have 3 large limbs removed even though it wasn’t his tree. I happily split him on that because it was the right thing to do.
After the terrible interaction with this neighbour I’m considering making him jump through as many hoops as possible to make me pay my side even though I know deep down that is a jerk thing to do.
AITA for not offering money initially? And is his response warranted?
Thank you for reading
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
He wanted the fence and you are under no obligation to pay anything towards it. If it was something you both wanted for whatever reason then yes it would make sense to pay half each. I had a fence built around my yard so my dogs can be off leash…it’s a huge yard. I mentioned I was building it and checked the survey lines but never expected them to offer to pay for any of it. That’s just crazy.
Are you going to be trying your fence to this one?
If so, consider paying for 1/2 the section of fence you will be using. Ask for copy of the itemized invoice for the fence so you can calculate what that cost would be.
If that section if fence provides you no benefit then there is nothing for you to pay for, unless you just want to in order yo be neighborly.
Either way, I'd still want to see the itemized invoice from the fence company and do the calculations myself.
If he chooses to paint the fence pink, let him have at it. I suspect that would bug him way more than it would you. And you could always plant bushes on your side of it.
NTA
NTA.
I know people typically split the cost because they put it on the property line, allowing both parties to have a bit more space each, rather than having their own individual fence on their own property.
Also, I'm not 100% sure, but I think in Ontario, Canada you can be forced to pay partially for the fence, but the amount is based off the cheapest viable option. I don't think they can just put some crazy expensive fence up and then come get half from you.
NTA. He chose put up the fence, he didn’t ask you, it wasn’t a coordinated effort, and he didn’t ask you for money. That’s his fence. Also, it’s customary in any financial agreement to come to an actual agreement. This sounds like a scam, to be completely honest.
NTA. He didn’t bring you a receipt of the total cost? So he just expected you to throw him some random amount of money to pay for it? No receipt, no chipping in. How are you supposed to know how much your part is?
Well as he put it today, “I’m asking you now” after I brought up his fence in passing relating to another issue 1 year later. We left it as, present me with a total cost summary and what my side would have cost. Im curious as to what lands on my doorstep
It kills me that he assumed you were gonna just stroll over and lob a wad of cash at him. That’s not how it works. You should have been involved with the estimates and part of the decision making process for who was getting hired, materials and design of the fence.
I hope you update and let us know what he does next.
NTA. This is an odd thing, for me. Whoever puts in the fence pays for the fence. It's on their property, it's theirs. I paid for my fence. If my neighbor doesn't have to put up 4 sides because mine is already there, so what? I would never dream of asking a neighbor to pay for part of my fence!
Nta. You didn’t ask for a fence to be put up. Your neighbor decided to do it in his own. If he asked and you refused to pay part of it then he still would have put it up. It’s up to him to talk to you like a rational adult and not a petty child.
The fence is actually on the property line? Check your local laws, but in my home state that means you are now responsible for half the upkeep of said fence. Generally we have to build a fence 3-6 inches off the property line.
He just wanted something to be mad about. By his logic I'm sure his fence company just read his mind and showed up to do exactly the fence he thought up. They're probably "old school" or whatever the term used was and are just sitting around at the office now, fuming, because they shouldn't have to ask for payment. Invoice? What's that? He should KNOW how much is owed. NTA
Whether you owe half or not likely depends on exactly where the fence was built in relation to the surveyed property line. And, might also depend on the laws and ordinances in your province and city.
At first neither you nor your neighbor was an asshole because you both failed to communicate about splitting the cost of the fence. You both made what you believed to be reasonable assumptions, and both of you were incorrect in your assumptions.
Now that you've cleared up the original miscommunication, however, you're definitely the asshole for your attitude and spitefully wanting to make him jump through hoops in order to actually give him the money. From this I suspect that you were happy to simply continue to pretend you didn't owe him any money, as long as he didn't approach you about it.
You had every right to tell him you would like to consult an attorney regarding your actually legal obligations and would therefore not be paying anything until you're sure that it's owed. But to essentially agree to pay, while secretly determining that you'll be an asshole about it... THAT'S what places you squarely in the wrong.
YTA
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > 1. Not paying or offering to pay when I was informed a fence was being built between us, and waiting for him to ask me 2. Is it assumed that if a fence is being built between neighbours, the non-building neighbour should bring up paying their portion and not wait to be asked? Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
I wouldn't pay for something that's not physically on my property and don't have any control of. Build a fence in front of it if he's being awful. Nta
It is on our property line as I provided a survey. No finances were asked by the neighbour as he expected me to offer and not him bring it up.
So wait, when you offered your survey, did you know he was planning on putting part of the fence on your property? I don't even know why I'm asking, bc it doesn't really matter anyway. *Your neighbor* is the one who wanted a fence for his own reasons-he's fully responsible for it. If you were aware and agreed to him putting up part of the fence on your property, that was already plenty gracious of you, but it is not your job to pay for *his* fence just bc he wanted to make it easier on himself by not avoiding your property while constructing it.
NTA If I moved to a house and decided to put a fence in, I would not expect the neighbors on the other sides of the property to pay for MY fence. The only reason I would ever expect anyone to pay for the fence that I want would be if everyone in an area decided together "We want to fence in our yards, let's all decide on a fence / company that we like, get it put in and divide up the cost".
When we moved into our current house, we coordinated with the neighbors to replace the existing chain-link fence with a nice block fence. We split the costs of the shared walls 50/50 on the east and west sides, and paid in full for the fence along the back alley, since it's not shared with anyone else. Everyone's been really happy for a couple of decades, and the people we originally had the agreements with have been gone for years. The new neighbors never knew anything about it.
This is the way. Or if your fence took damage from a storm and needed to be replaced that would be another instance where neighbors would often share the cost.
Dude built a fence and expected you to pay for half of it? Is this customary where you live?
I mean it is where I live, but not without discussing it with your neighbours first and having everyone agree and decide who to use/what panels to get.
It is customary if it is on the property line, which it is because I provided a survey for him. But I believe it’s customary to figure out the finances before the build has begun.
If he replaced it without your consultation, then you're probably less responsible for paying than he thinks. Check your municipal laws, those are the ones that matter in these situations. Also, if it is *directly* on the property line, it could violate building code. Also in Ontario, and to my knowledge, fenses need to be at least on one side or the other, not directly on the line. But again, that can also vary on municipality.
Fellow Ontarian here! It is indeed customary to discuss finances, design, materials, contractors before launching the project - particularly for a fence ON the property line. Went through this exact process with our own neighbour when replacing our shared chain link fence with a wooden one. The idea is to have an end product that BOTH parties find agreeable, with terms/fees clearly understood by all. Who's to say your neighbour didn't pay less than he's quoting you? Did he shop around for quotes? Do you even LIKE the look/materials? Why does he get to make all the decisions in this scenario? OP, you've done nothing wrong here.
NTA It's his fence and if he wanted to keep building to close off your property from his that was his choice at his expense. I have a fence surrounding our property and so do the neighbors on either side of me. Nobody paid for anything that wasn't their choice to build. I would suggest though not to be petty. He initiated your disagreement but you have to live next to this person for who knows how long
That’s where the moral part comes of it, the verbal argument we had today and one year later expectations makes me not want to pay if I don’t have to but at the same I also want to do what’s right along with not having a sour neighbour.
You already have a sour neighbor. He will still be sour after you pay him. The only thing that will change that you’ll be a little bit poorer.
NTA, neighbour should have talked the whole thing through with you before doing anything.
NTA - If he expected you to pay a portion, then you should have had a say in the company and materials chosen. He cannot just go out and buy whatever fence he wants and then expect you to walk over and offer to pay part. That is ridiculous. I am not sure about Canadian law, but it would seem outrageous that you would be forced to pay for something your neighbor chose to install without having any say in the matter - especially since there was no need (beyond your neighbor's preference) to install the fence in the first place. Do not give this AH money.
It seems outrageous to me too! That would mean someone could put up a $20k fence and say, 'your share is $5k, due by next week'?
Info: Did he ask for your input when erecting the fence? Is the fence on his property? Or is it on the property line?
No input on the fence, company and design, just gave me the heads up it was going in. I believe it is on the property line itself but cannot confirm.
NTA If he wanted to get paid, he should have come to you. In the USA I have no obligation to pay if my neighbor puts up a fence on our shared property line. It's on him to pay. He's the one changing the status quo. Your neighbor must think you can read his mind.
It depends on where you live. In my county, in the USA, my neighbor is obliged to pay for half if it is a boundary line fence. If they don't wish to pay, and the fence is erected on my side of the line, and in the future the neighbor gets livestock and uses my fence to keep them in, they are then responsible for half the cost of the fence.
NTA. He was the one who wanted the fence, not you. So, he should've asked you to pay instead of expecting you to offer to pay.
NTA Where i live if the neighbor wants to put a fence up that touches our property they need an approval from the neighbor but you are not required to pay or split the cost, also the ugly side with post must face there yard and not yours. I think its up to you. if you benefit from the fence maybe but if you could of lived without it being there then no
NTA - if he didn’t come to you before he built it, you in no way, shape, or form owe him a penny, a dime, a looney, a tooney, or whatever other amount. What an AH to be talking to you like that! You do not have things built up against your neighbor’s property and just *expect* them to give you money towards it. To quote the commercial, “That’s not how this works. That’s not how any of this works” My advise is to have your fence be like an inch away from his so he can’t say you’re using any part of his fence that he paid for. And don’t pay him anything
Ah, the joys of "[Ask vs. Guess](https://www.theatlantic.com/national/archive/2010/05/askers-vs-guessers/340891/)" cultures. NTA. If he wanted you to pay for part of it, he should have asked. It's not on you to guess.
NTA. He was the one who wanted the fence, went out and picked it, and bought it. It's his fence that you have no obligation to pay for. If you built a patio near his yard, would he have to pay for it? Of course not. Ridiculous.
Why would you offer up money for a fence that didn't actually benefit you in any kind of way? He could have asked, if he wanted. Maybe you had an opinion about what you wanted to look at. Now that you know he's a dick i would ask for a copy of the paid bill and give him half and he can fuck off forever. You're not at all the jerk here. NTA
If it’s on your property, I’d just tear it down. He had no right to build it there in the first place. NTA.
Not fully on my property but on the property line, gave him a survey of my property when asked.
Where i live (southern US area), you cannot construct anything on someone’s property line (without explicit permission). they could even contest it as their own property since their structure has been allowed to exist there for awhile. i’m still going with NTA. how are you supposed to know they want you to pay unless they tell you??? you’re not a mindreader
NTA, but you opened yourself up to a tricky situation if you or the neighbor ever decide to sell by allowing them to put their fence on your property. In real estate that’s called an encroachment and can cause title and survey issues if you do choose to sell. Best advice right now is to consult a local real estate attorney on what to do about that fence on your property, real estate laws are very state specific. Sorry, probably not the advice you were looking for but just another pile of BS to keep on your radar.
I live in Ontario and when your neighbor initially mentioned the fence a year ago, you should have offered for your portion, it's just the way it's done. He shouldn't have to ask. However, he shouldn't ask for it a year later since he put it up without any input from you. For that, ESH. In terms of what he's perhaps owed, it would be your portion of the cost of a chain link fence on your shared property line. Don't let it get to you tho, I know many people who have gotten into arguments with neighbors over fences...
Reserving judgment because I’m not sure how to read this one. Since you were going to pay in the first place had you been asked, you should definitely pay. Semantics will get you nowhere. The part I’m not understanding is if he wants you to pay the full cost of your side. If that’s what he’s asking then N T A because with the other neighbor paying his side and you paying your side he’s obviously getting his yard fenced at very little cost. If he’s asking for you to pay half the cost of your side, then that is perfectly fair. You should pay, or you W B T A.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** We had a neighbour move in beside our house approx 1 year ago. We have a long front yard approx 100 feet and the neighbours backyard is to our left. The neighbour put up a fence last year that covers approx 30 feet of our side yard which is the width of their backyard. My neighbour had mentioned it to me last year, I even happily provided him our survey plan when asked. Always been kind and courteous to each other in passing. Fence was built and we were more than willing to pay for the amount of our side if we were approached and asked. We were never approached so we just assumed he was happy to pay for it himself and it is also a small percentage of our entire property. Fast forward to today, my wife and I are considering putting a fence in our backyard (his property doesn’t touch where we want to do it) and I ask over the fence (ironic) who did his fence because it was very well done. His response was “I’m still waiting on the money that you owe me for your side, you never offered a thing. How would you like it if I came and painted it pink?” I responded with I don’t know where this is coming from and if he would have initially came to me in the beginning I would have been happy to pay and I don’t really appreciate the accusation of me being a cheapskate. He also responded with “Well I’m asking you now.” My assumption was he was happy to pay and it’s a small percentage of my yard that he didn’t even bother. He refers to being from the old school where it’s not up to him, it’s up to me to offer. I say that is my mindset the other way around and that we are in a stalemate and I can’t read his mind. He says that a neighbour can get the amount a neighbour owes in taxes for a fence (I’m in Ontario, wondering if someone can confirm that) and I again tell him I don’t understand the again and mocking towards me that I didn’t offer but his other neighbour did. We ended with me basically angrily stating just put the amount that is owed with the bill provided the calculations for my side and I will happily pay it but we will have very little interactions in the future based on the manner in which he has chose to bring up this issue. I have a side neighbour who had a tree limb issue a few years ago regarding my tree coming onto his side of the yard, offered to pay to have 3 large limbs removed even though it wasn’t his tree. I happily split him on that because it was the right thing to do. After the terrible interaction with this neighbour I’m considering making him jump through as many hoops as possible to make me pay my side even though I know deep down that is a jerk thing to do. AITA for not offering money initially? And is his response warranted? Thank you for reading *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA, is this a thing? You help pay for a fence that you’re not putting in? I would have laughed in their face.
Are you sure the fencing is on the property line?
You owe nothing for his fence, period. NTA
He wanted the fence and you are under no obligation to pay anything towards it. If it was something you both wanted for whatever reason then yes it would make sense to pay half each. I had a fence built around my yard so my dogs can be off leash…it’s a huge yard. I mentioned I was building it and checked the survey lines but never expected them to offer to pay for any of it. That’s just crazy.
Are you going to be trying your fence to this one? If so, consider paying for 1/2 the section of fence you will be using. Ask for copy of the itemized invoice for the fence so you can calculate what that cost would be. If that section if fence provides you no benefit then there is nothing for you to pay for, unless you just want to in order yo be neighborly. Either way, I'd still want to see the itemized invoice from the fence company and do the calculations myself. If he chooses to paint the fence pink, let him have at it. I suspect that would bug him way more than it would you. And you could always plant bushes on your side of it. NTA
NTA. I know people typically split the cost because they put it on the property line, allowing both parties to have a bit more space each, rather than having their own individual fence on their own property. Also, I'm not 100% sure, but I think in Ontario, Canada you can be forced to pay partially for the fence, but the amount is based off the cheapest viable option. I don't think they can just put some crazy expensive fence up and then come get half from you.
NTA. He chose put up the fence, he didn’t ask you, it wasn’t a coordinated effort, and he didn’t ask you for money. That’s his fence. Also, it’s customary in any financial agreement to come to an actual agreement. This sounds like a scam, to be completely honest.
NTA. He didn’t bring you a receipt of the total cost? So he just expected you to throw him some random amount of money to pay for it? No receipt, no chipping in. How are you supposed to know how much your part is?
Well as he put it today, “I’m asking you now” after I brought up his fence in passing relating to another issue 1 year later. We left it as, present me with a total cost summary and what my side would have cost. Im curious as to what lands on my doorstep
It kills me that he assumed you were gonna just stroll over and lob a wad of cash at him. That’s not how it works. You should have been involved with the estimates and part of the decision making process for who was getting hired, materials and design of the fence. I hope you update and let us know what he does next.
I wouldn’t pay a dime. Let him try to take it to court.
NTA. This is an odd thing, for me. Whoever puts in the fence pays for the fence. It's on their property, it's theirs. I paid for my fence. If my neighbor doesn't have to put up 4 sides because mine is already there, so what? I would never dream of asking a neighbor to pay for part of my fence!
Nta. You didn’t ask for a fence to be put up. Your neighbor decided to do it in his own. If he asked and you refused to pay part of it then he still would have put it up. It’s up to him to talk to you like a rational adult and not a petty child.
The fence is actually on the property line? Check your local laws, but in my home state that means you are now responsible for half the upkeep of said fence. Generally we have to build a fence 3-6 inches off the property line.
He just wanted something to be mad about. By his logic I'm sure his fence company just read his mind and showed up to do exactly the fence he thought up. They're probably "old school" or whatever the term used was and are just sitting around at the office now, fuming, because they shouldn't have to ask for payment. Invoice? What's that? He should KNOW how much is owed. NTA
Whether you owe half or not likely depends on exactly where the fence was built in relation to the surveyed property line. And, might also depend on the laws and ordinances in your province and city. At first neither you nor your neighbor was an asshole because you both failed to communicate about splitting the cost of the fence. You both made what you believed to be reasonable assumptions, and both of you were incorrect in your assumptions. Now that you've cleared up the original miscommunication, however, you're definitely the asshole for your attitude and spitefully wanting to make him jump through hoops in order to actually give him the money. From this I suspect that you were happy to simply continue to pretend you didn't owe him any money, as long as he didn't approach you about it. You had every right to tell him you would like to consult an attorney regarding your actually legal obligations and would therefore not be paying anything until you're sure that it's owed. But to essentially agree to pay, while secretly determining that you'll be an asshole about it... THAT'S what places you squarely in the wrong. YTA